Date: Fri, 14 Apr 2017 10:14:58 -0500
From: D B <donbon@gmail.com>
Subject: The Journey of a Lonely Heart part 5

The Journey of a Lonely Heart, Part 5 by DGB

This story is a product of my imagination, under my copyright, so no
reposting/publishing without my consent.  Hell has a special place for
copyright violators. If you are not of legal age or somewhere in which this
document is illegal, stop reading and think about what you've accessed.

Have you donated to Nifty? I have: http://donate.nifty.org/donate.html

If you enjoy the story, I'd appreciate comments to donbon@gmail.com.

*****************************************

Trevor lay awake in the darkness of early morning, trying to sort through a
swirl of emotions. He had lost a patient yesterday, a promising life at an
end. But the rhythmic breathing of the man holding him was proof of a new
beginning.

The news had spread quickly through the clinic, it always did.  He was
writing up notes between patients when a nurse told him.  Looking back now
he felt foolish for the way he had acted. Trevor couldn't remember all the
details, but he remembered abruptly telling Tiffany to cover for him as he
rushed out.  He resolved to go to the clinic today and make a point of
personally calling the patients he had left untreated yesterday afternoon.
What if something happened to them because he had left? Even worse this
wasn't the first time he had done this. But he knew it would be the last.

Derek shifted in his sleep, unconsciously tightening his hold.  "And that
would be my other problem," thought Trevor.  "What am I going to do about
Derek?"

He was scared by how much the man meant to him after only a week.  Not even
Tiffany had worked her way into his heart this fast.  It had taken nearly
three months as lab partners before they started to hang out socially, and
several more before he considered her a friend.  He could count on one hand
the number of serious dates he'd been on. Always just dates.

Trevor had never recovered from his first love, if one could call it that.
Kurt had been his roommate in college when he was a pre-med student.  The
university had randomly paired them together in the dorm their junior year,
the stereotypical mismatch of the jock and the nerd.  Kurt was blonde, buff
and popular. It wasn't unusual for Trevor to get back from the library and
find a sock on the doorknob, signaling that Kurt was screwing yet another
girl in their room.

Things had changed just before Christmas.  Trevor was up late studying for
one last exam before the holiday.  Kurt had come in drunk, complaining that
a sorority girl had left him with blue balls.  He had stripped down to
nothing but his tight boxer briefs and flopped onto his bed.  Normally Kurt
would just pass out, but tonight he kept whining about how bad he needed to
get off.

"I'll give you a blowjob if it will get you to shut the fuck up!" the words
left Trevor's lips before he could stop himself.

Up until that point he had kept his desires hidden, but now Kurt was just
staring at him across the room. "Fuck I knew you had to be gay since I've
never seen you with a chick.  Get over here and do it already."

That first time had been quick and dirty, Kurt holding his head as he
thrust into him.  He passed out shortly after he got off, still sleeping
when Trevor left for his exam.  Trevor had gotten a B, not because he
didn't know the material, but because he was too worried about what would
happen when he got back to his room.

But Kurt was already gone by the time he finished the test.  Kurt avoided
him after the holiday for a few days, but a week or so later they were
almost back to normal.  Friday night Kurt surprised Trevor when he brought
a pizza back to the room and suggested they watch a movie.  Trevor
swallowed two loads by the final credits, setting the stage for the rest of
the semester.

Looking back Trevor realized Kurt only used him to get off.  Oh sure he had
treated him nice enough, even letting him sleep with him now and then.
Trevor told himself that Kurt never asked him to go anywhere because he
respected his studious behavior.

The arrangement lasted until the end of the spring term when housing
assignments for the next year were published. If both roommates submitted a
request they could stay together, but Trevor had checked his letter to find
he had been paired with someone new.  Surely Kurt had just forgotten to
submit the request?

That night Kurt had simply said "The head's been great, but why would I
spend another year with you?" before he headed out to a party.  Trevor
slept in his car that night, and never spoke to Kurt again.

============================================

After that Trevor had focused on his studies, refusing to ever be used like
that again.  But every guy he had gone on a date with wanted something.
One kid thought he could score prescription pain killers, others wanted a
sugar daddy, but most just wanted a quick fuck.  He always felt guilty when
he gave into hormones and fooled around.

And then he met Derek.

It was Tiffany's idea to invite him over for dinner.  She had caught Trevor
watching him several times at the donor event, and said there was really
only one way to find out what kind of man he was.  So they hatched the plan
to casually invite him over.  And then Derek had shown up with his favorite
wine.  Only an attentive person would remember something like that.

Hell, Derek hadn't even known he was gay, thinking he and Tiffany were
married.  They had talked all night, and aside from some suggestive
flirting Derek hadn't even tried to get in his pants.  Of course Sunday had
been a different story, but he had stuck around to cuddle even after they
both got off.  Derek just felt right.

And Derek had picked up the tab for Mexican food so he couldn't be after
money.  He had bought Chinese last night too, without expecting anything in
return.  He showed up unannounced, "I need you to understand I'm here for
you no matter what," he had said.

Trevor knew he would never forget those words, or how cute Derek looked
saying it.  The big man was trying to act all macho but was obviously
worried he was about to get thrown out of the house.  Trevor probably would
have if Derek hadn't run for the guest bedroom.

Trevor didn't know if he was angry or something else when he went to the
bedroom. He opened the door and looked into Derek's eyes and recognized the
look he had seen so many times at the work; a grief stricken parent
powerless to take away their child's pain.

In that moment Trevor finally understood what Derek was after. Him. Just
him.  His tears had been for far more than just his lost patient.  Trevor
had shed the shame he had held since that night with Kurt so many years
ago.

The alarm clock jolted Trevor from his thoughts. He shut off the offending
noise as Derek groaned awake.  Trevor rolled over to kiss him good morning.

"Ungh is it morning already?" Derek grumbled.

Trevor couldn't help smirking, "I'll make coffee while you're in the
shower."

Derek just grunted as Trevor left the room.

================================

Twenty minutes later Derek stumbled into the kitchen freshly showered,
heading straight for the mug Trevor had just poured. Derek inhaled deeply
before taking several large sips.  "Gee, good to know where I rate," Trevor
teased.

Derek finished the mug before setting it on the counter.  "Sorry, I've
never been a morning person until I get my fix," he said, pulling Trevor
into a tight embrace, stealing his breath away with a kiss.

"That's better," Trevor smiled, "I guess caffeine is the way to your
heart."

"You don't need coffee."

Derek had gotten cuddlier by the end of the second cup.  "You need to get
to work and I should get ready," Trevor said as he noticed the time.

"That reminds me... I need to tell you what happened yesterday."

Trevor remembered the text, "That's right you said you had some news."

Derek thought for a moment before he started, "I didn't want you to worry
so I didn't say anything earlier in the week, but the foundation has a
policy against staff and board members dating.  I was ready to resign if I
had to, but Robyn discussed it with the leadership team yesterday and
they're recommending to change the policy with no disciplinary action." He
hung his head before continuing, "Tiffany confronted me after the meeting
and was pissed I hadn't told you."

Trevor started to giggle, causing Derek to look up. "Robyn called me Monday
to give me a heads up before she discussed my personal life with everyone
else.  I offered to resign my board position too just so you know.  I
honestly thought you knew."

"Well aren't we a pair," Derek grinned before stealing another kiss.

"I'm sorry last night wasn't the most romantic," Trevor paused, "and I
invited Tiffany and Ryan for dinner tonight earlier this week. I mean, I
had planned to ask you too..."

"I sort of packed enough clothes to stay more than one night," Derek
blushed before continuing, "wishful thinking I guess."

"Good so I'll see you tonight.  Now get out of here before we're both late
to work."

=====================================

Trevor was only 5 minutes late, surprising Tiffany when he walked into
their lab.

Tiffany started, "I wasn't expecting you today.  Are you sure you're up to
it?"

"Completely," Trevor answered. "Derek came over last night... well I'll
tell you about that later. Anyway this morning I realized no matter what
happens on any given day I still have other patients counting on me, and
I'm going to do my best to never let them down again."

The pair got to work in the lab as Trevor filled her in on his evening.  He
kept him morning revelations about Kurt to himself since he had never told
Tiffany the whole story.  It was just one of those subjects between friends
that was avoided by silent agreement.  Trevor thought that maybe one day he
would be able to tell Derek.

Trevor's phone dinged with a text notification, "I was thinking about this
morning. Hope you didn't feel like you had to invite me/pressured into.  If
you need a night alone or with Tiffany let me know and I can just head home
after work, no hurt feelings."

"I need you to defend me! Those two will gang up on me," Trevor fired back.
He thought a moment before adding, "I really do want to see you tonight."

"I can't wait XOXO," popped up in response before Trevor could put his
phone down.

Trevor couldn't help but giggle.  Derek may act like "Mr. Confident"
professionally but he was a basket case of nerves when it came to their
relationship.  Maybe there was something he could do to change that.

"Hey Tiff, are you guys still coming for dinner tonight?"

"We don't have any other plans; do you still want us to?"

"Of course.  I'm going to head out at 2 this afternoon to grab groceries
and a few other things.  Derek is coming over when he gets off work so head
over whenever."

=======================================

Trevor had just put a box by the trashcan when Derek pulled into the
driveway, so he waited by the kitchen door for his guest.  "What did you
get on your jeans? It looks like you had an accident."

"Well hello to you too," Derek gave him a quick kiss. "A waiter spilled
coke on me at lunch. I've been sticky all afternoon."

"You've got time to grab a shower if you want before Tiff and Ryan get
here."

Trevor hurried to finish prepping the lasagna, slipping it into the oven
just before he heard the shower turn off.  He dried his hands before
heading to the bedroom where Derek was standing with just a towel wrapped
around his waist.

"Hey babe, I was just about to come looking for you," Derek said. "Where'd
you move my bag? I swear I left it sitting in the corner."

Trevor suddenly felt nervous, unsure of his plan, "I know last night didn't
exactly go the way either of us planned, but you being here meant more to
me than you'll ever know."  Trevor paused for a moment trying to find the
right words, "You said you needed me to understand you were here for me no
matter what but I didn't really get what you meant.  Then you sent me that
text this morning to make sure I was ok and that you hadn't pressured me
into inviting you back tonight, and that's when it clicked. I realized I
need you to understand how much I need you, here, with me." Trevor's eyes
were glassy with tears while he waited for the other man to react.

Derek crossed the room and wrapped his arms around the smaller man, "It's
ok, I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere."

Trevor let himself be calmed by the hug for a moment before he continued,
"I unpacked your bag into the two dressers drawers on the left.  I cleared
some space for you in the closet too, but you have to share the bathroom
drawer, I mean, if you want."

"Oh I want. I definitely want."  Derek moved his right hand to cup Trevor's
head, using his thumb to gently wipe a tear from his boyfriend's cheek, his
left arm pulling them close. "I love you Trevor Smith."

"And I love you Derek Evans," returning the kiss with fevered passion.

His confidence restored, Trevor let his hands roam along his prize, the
towel dropping to the floor as they pressed their bodies closer
together. Derek moaned into the kiss as he felt a hand caress his ass, a
gentle whimper as a finger slid down his crack.

Neither man moved when the doorbell rang.  `Fuck," Trevor groaned as a
sharp knock echoed through the house.  "I'll get the door while you get
dressed."

He stole a quick final kiss before heading for the door. "It took you long
enough." Tiffany said, "I was beginning to think you were indecent."
Trevor's blushed showed just how close to the mark her barb had been. "Oh
my, perhaps we should come back in 5 minutes," she finished, dramatically
fanning herself.

Trevor wasn't going to let his partner have the upper hand this time, "Is
Ryan only good for five minutes? You know you could get him drugs for
that."

"Hey hey hey! Leave me out of this you two," Ryan interjected.  "And you,"
he said looking at his wife, "play nice."

Feeling just a twinge of guilt Tiffany started again," Trevor you know I am
just teasing.  After Ryan you are the most important man in my life.  I
just want you to be happy."

"I am," Trevor replied with conviction. "I've fallen hard for Derek, and
who knows what tomorrow will bring, but right now he's made me happier than
I have ever been before."

Walking into the living room in time to catch the tail end of conversation
Derek added, "and you make me happy too."

The two men shared a quick kiss as their guests looked on.  Tiffany's eyes
searched the kitchen, something seemed off. "Is that a new coffee machine
by the mixer?"

Trevor smiled, "Yeah I bought a Nespresso machine this afternoon in
self-defense, someone tends to be awfully grumpy in the morning before his
caffeine fix."

Derek took Trevor in his arms and pulled him in for a deep kiss, not caring
that they had an audience. "Welcome home," Trevor whispered when they broke
apart.

Derek just leaned in for another kiss, hoping Trevor could feel his
emotions.

Ryan broke the moment, "Well someone is getting laid tonight."

=====================================

All four had fun that evening, just enjoying each other's company. When
they had moved the conversation into the living room Tiffany just smiled
when Trevor sat in Derek's lap.  She observed her best friend had changed,
alight with the glow of love. A few minutes after nine she turned to Ryan,
"let's head home before these two start going at it on the couch.  If you
play your cards right, they won't be the only ones getting lucky."

Ryan quickly departed with his wife, leaving the lovers to finish cleaning
up dinner.  Trevor started to wash dishes while Derek retrieved the empty
wine glasses from the living room.  Derek sat the glasses down and embraced
Trevor from behind.  He bent his head forward to slowly trail kisses along
the smaller man's neck.

"I know we haven't really talked about it, but you can finish what you
started in the bedroom whenever you want," Derek whispered in his ear. "I
haven't let anyone else in years..."

Trevor shuddered, his lovers bulge pressed into his backside igniting a
need a deep within him. He shut off the faucet, "I haven't either.  We'll
both need to start slow."

Trevor spun around to see Derek face filled with anticipation.  They met in
a passionate kiss before heading for the bedroom, turning off the lights as
they went.

Hours later they drifted off to sleep, having claimed the other as their
own.  Trevor and Derek were home.

*************************************************************

I hope you have enjoyed reading this story.  I give a heartfelt thanks to
those of you that sent me a note of encouragement, and for letting me
indulge in a bit of storytelling.  This feels like it might be the end of
the tale, but I'm not ruling out more if I can find the right words.  I
might try to give voice to some of the other characters in my head too :-)
-DGB