Date: Tue, 21 Dec 1999 10:55:24 EST
From: SSch191950@aol.com
Subject: The Knife That Twists Within 12

It's been a while since the last upload and I want to apologize for it.
I can only hope you haven't forgot about me and didn't lose your interest.
Have a merry Christmas!

Stefan


The Knife That Twists Within
by Stefan

Part 12


Marcus had just got out of the car as both men arrived. He smiled at them.

   "This is Ben," Nicholas introduced him and Marcus stretched out his hand.

   "Hi Ben. I've heard a lot about you."

Ben's ears began to glow. "Indeed? What terrible things he has told you
about me?" he grinned.

   "All good, Ben. Can we give you a lift somewhere?"

Ben shook his head. "No, no, it's not necessary. It's been a pleasure for
me Mr. Weidenbruch." And to Nicholas, "See you tomorrow, Nick. Have fun.
Bye."

He waved briefly and walked slowly away.

Marcus watched him go. "He's a nice lad, honey, you are right." He turned
to Nicholas. "Try not to fall in love with him, promised?"

Nicholas laughed. "I promise."

   "Sebastian called", Marcus said, "Simon didn't turn up yesterday, but he
seemed to be well-known in the club." He took Nicholas' bundle and put it into
the car. "But there's something else. He deals with drugs."

   "Drugs? Shit. Which drugs?"

   "Ecstasy and cocaine. Perhaps harder drugs, too."

Marcus looked a little depressed, and Nicholas briefly touched his hair.
"We'll find him some day. Don't you think so?" he said. "But then what do we
do? Take him home with us? Perhaps he's addicted too."

   "Don't know right now. Let's think about it when we've found him, ok?"
Marcus smiled at Nick. "Now, what exciting things have you learned today?"

   "Oh, we went on a trip to the Schinkel museum along with the architecture
students to have a look at his sculptures."

   "Indeed? It's like a school-outing, isn't it? And Frank?"

   "I tried to find out something, but it seems as if nothing happened up till
now between them. Then Ben told me something strange about how he's looking
for a strong man to take control of him. What could he mean?"

Marcus didn't answer.

   "Do you think he meant it sexually? Rough sex?" Nicholas waited for an
answer.

Marcus shrugged his shoulders. "Could be." He grabbed Nicholas' hand. "What
would you like to do now?"

   "You don't have to work?"

   "It's all done. I have to prepare the next exhibition, but it's a bit
difficult for me because of the recent fire, you know."

He began to walk with Nicholas along the street stopping several times in front
of shop windows.

   "Do you mean all the guys won't display their paintings with you because of
the fire? But I think, the attacks concerns me rather than you!"

Marcus smiled at Nicholas' face in the shop window. "But I have some paintings
from several young guys in my workshop. Do you want to have a look at them? Or
choose the best for me?"

Nicholas' face lit up. "Of course. I'd like that."

Marcus squeezed his hand. "And I'm sure between my bookshelves we can find
some books about Schinkel. I love him, too."

He pointed at the glassware on show. "What do you think about the beer
glasses? If you're going to share my house in future we'll need some glasses
for you." Marcus winked. "Come."

Ten minutes later both came out loaded with parcels and walked back towards
the car.

   "Did I ever tell you that I attended the same school?" Marcus asked.

   "No, you didn't!" Nicholas suddenly stopped and stared at the imposing
portal of the Academy. "Look, there's Frank," he said in a low voice. Marcus
spun around.

   "Where?" He looked across to where a medium-sized, slender, good looking
man with straight and very fair hair was coming down the steps.

Marcus narrowed his eyes to small slits.

  "And there is Ben."

Frank. So this was the man who had caused Nicholas so much hurt and pain.
Hate boiled up in Marcus' guts and he quickened his steps. He felt the urge
to confront the man face to face.

  "Marcus, stop it." Somehow Nicholas voice reached his ears from the
distance. He appeared at his side and firmly grasped his upper arm. "What
are you going to do?

   "I want to say a few words to that asshole."

Ben had noticed that Marcus was coming up to them and stopped. Frank's and
Marcus' eyes met and their looks were icy like crossing blades. Frank sized
Marcus up speculatively and decided to come closer. He put one arm around
Ben's shoulder and dragged him along with him. Nick saw that Ben would have
liked to vanish into thin air and he felt the same but it was too late to
flee.

   "Hi, Ben," Marcus said quietly, "now I see why you preferred to stay here."
His eyes wandered to Frank's grinning face. "I'd be a bit more careful, if I
were you in your choice of friends", he said slowly. "I guess the public
prosecutor would like to know what you are doing with dependants."

   "What do you mean? I am of age." Ben said.

   "This may be, Ben, but it doesn't alter the fact that you and this man are
pupil and teacher."

Ben's face all of a sudden looked full of hatred at Marcus and Frank let out
a husky laugh.

   "Thanks for the advice. I know what I'm doing. Nevertheless thanks for the
tip."

His grin was relaxed and Marcus wondered briefly if Frank was either very
stupid or had some influential backing from someone.

   "You are welcome with the tip," he said his gaze never leaving Frank's
light blue eyes. "Still keen on hard core sex?"

Nicholas almost squashed Marcus' hand.

   "I only hope you know what you're doing, Ben. But, after all as you say,
you are of age."

Marcus left both men alone and, still holding Nicholas' hand, dragged him to
his car and got in. Without a word they drove away.

But Ben stood petrified and watched the black car disappear.

   "I didn't realized that it could be dangerous to be with you," he croaked.
His mouth felt dry.

   "I don't know what you mean." Frank's voice was as calm as ever. "It isn't
forbidden to visit your teacher's home."

   "But to have sex with him, right?" Ben's eyes sparkled with anger behind
his thin glasses. "Do you know Marcus Weidenbruch?" he continued, "And what
did he  mean about "hard core sex"?"

Frank shrugged and began to walk over to his car. "I have no clue why Nick
told him. Listen, Ben. This Nick once was very much in love with me and tried
to get into a love affair with me. But as Weidenbruch said rightly - I could
lose my job having sex with a pupil - no matter if female or male - so he
tried to blackmail me, saying I had seduced him if I wouldn't be willing to
fuck him. But I have some family connections with the ministry which would
protect me from any false accusation, so eventually Nick gave up and left the
Academy."

He smiled at Ben. "So do you want to come with me?"

Ben was more than confused. He tried to think clearly, remembering the day he
had met Nick in the hall, heard Nick saying he had had Frank as his teacher
before, and the way he said this: stern, with disdain in his voice. Now, which
was true and which wrong? Nick in love with Frank? Hard to believe. And more
the mention of hard core sex struck him.

Quickly he said, "Sorry Frank. I forgot, I have to deal with something. See
you tomorrow." He turned to go.

   "Hey," Frank called after him. "Don't let them make you feel unsure of
yourself, do you hear me?"

Ben smiled weakly and went away.



Marcus calmed down slowly. "I don't think that was a good idea", he said.
He looked quickly at Nicholas' reserved face. "I know I told you not to
interfere, but I had to go to him. I would have choked otherwise."

   "It's OK."

   "Now it's obvious Ben is interested in Frank and it seems vice versa."

   "Hmm. Did you mean that seriously? You'd bring a charge against Frank?"

   "Not normally. Of course not. Only if he did nasty things to Ben, like with
you." He sighed. "It was stupid. I only want to give him a fright, but I guess
I failed completely."

Nicholas said nothing and Marcus was alarmed.

   "I'm sorry, baby. I guess you'll have a row with Ben tomorrow."

   "It's OK." Nicholas said once more.

   "That guy is as slippery as an eel," Marcus said then.

   "You mean you don't understand how I could fall in love with him, right?
Well, I guess Ben at the moment can see the side of Frank I saw back then, the
friendly, endearing side. But I can't stop him from making his own mistakes."

   "True. Oh shit!" Marcus slammed the brakes. He had almost driven through a
red traffic light. Nicholas touched the silver coin around his neck.

   "Do you think it works?"

   "What?"

   "That." Marcus looked at the ribbon and the shining medal.

   "Perhaps. You mean because we haven't had any more mysterious calls or
other accidents happened?

Nicholas nodded.

   "Knock on wood!" Marcus tapped his head and Nicholas grinned. He leaned
over and whispered "Forget about that shit Frank. It's over. I like Ben,
but..."

   "But?"

   "I don't want to think about it any more today. You said I could choose the
paintings for your next exhibition?"

Marcus nodded.

   "Then let's go to the workshop."


				

Kay pushed away his empty plate and patted his full belly.

   "You should cook more often," he said then and emptied his glass of wine.

   "If I did you'd become fat as a doughnut and me too. Come eat some more of
the pineapples." Sebastian hold out the filled spoon. Kay opened his mouth,
took it and chewed.

   "I think I'm going to burst!"

Sebastian leaned back in his chair. "So you wanted to talk with me before you
went to work. What was it about? I remember vaguely that you reproached me for
only having sex on my mind, wasn't it?" His green eyes pierced Kay's brown
ones.


   "Yes. Something like that."

   "Well, I thought you liked it."

   "Who doesn't?"

   "Wrong answer, sweetie." Sebastian still gazed into Kay's eyes. "I wanted
to know if you like sex with me."

Kay began to grin and lightly pinched the bridge of his nose.

   "Do you want me to show you how much I like it?" He leaned over the table
and dipped a finger into the pot of cream. He held it under Sebastian's nose
"Can you think of any use for this?"

Sebastian's eyes began to glisten.

   "Sure." He licked the finger clean and rose from the table.

   "Show me, baby. And don't forget the cream!"



   "What about a holiday?"

   "Holiday?" Kay still panted and wrapped his legs around Sebastian's waist.
He didn't want to lose his cock so soon. He noticed a little trace of white
cream in his sandy hair and wiped it away.

   "Yes, holiday," Sebastian repeated. "Or do you think I can stay here
forever? My home is in Rome."

   "Oh." Kay seemed to be disappointed. "Does this mean you are inviting me on
a trip to Rome?"

   "Yes."

   "Great! Of course I can have holidays. But not right now, you understand,
they must find a replacement."

He wriggled under Sebastian's heavy body. "But what's about Simon? Do you want
to give up the search?"

Sebastian frowned. For a moment he had completely forgotten Simon.

   "OK, give it a try this weekend. But I cannot play Miss Marple for ever.
Sure I want to help Marcus but ... I have to care for my job. I have some
projects going on there."

Sebastian shifted a bit and his cock slipped out and Kay felt emptiness. Of
course he wanted to spend his time with his lover and to do it in Rome would
be most exciting, but he too had a job to do and he would be disappointed to
give up the search for his brother. He couldn't. Not now.

He felt Sebastian's hot breath at his ear and realized he had said something
but hadn't heard. Quickly he asked "You wanted to tell me something about the
funny things standing downstairs. What's that strange little tree with the
gems hanging from the branches?"

Sebastian looked for a moment confused. "Oh, you mean the poison-tree. They
were used in the middle ages. The stones had the task to track down the poison
what was probably mixed in the dishes or to neutralise them. The gems would be
taken one after another from the tree and plunged into the dishes or wine of
kings and noble men. They believed the stones would began to sweat or to
change their colour as soon they came in touch with poison."

   "Indeed? Now, that's most odd. Hadn't they something like a food taster?"

Sebastian nodded. "That in addition." He grinned. "Any more questions?"

   "Yes. Can I stay here?"

   "Of course. As long as you want to. Tell you what. Tomorrow I'll buy myself
some leather gear to keep me warm on your motorcycle. I'll freeze my ass off
if I ride with you another time."

   "Old man."




The next morning Marcus shuffled into the kitchen to clean the table. He had
taken Nicholas to the Academy and was just returned. He smiled at the memory
of last evening when Nicholas had so easily chosen the right paintings and
drawings for the next exhibition. The lad really had the most marvellous taste.


Just as he finished clearing away the plates and cups and putting them into
the dish washer he heard Anna unlocking the door from outside.

The next minute she stood reproachfully in front of him and looked at the
empty and clean table.

   "You shouldn't do that, Marcus. It's my job."

   "Good Morning to you too, Anna." He watched Anna taking off her coat and
slipping into her apron. "You know I am old enough to do some cleaning by
myself," he continued.

Anna didn't answer.

   "Ah, come on, Anna. Stop sulking." Marcus said in a good-humoured tone,
"see what I've left for you: the whole house. You can mop up, clean the
windows, make the bed, do the laundry, iron the shirts, go shopping for some
grocery. Have I forgotten anything?"

Anna couldn't help but smile. She was never able to be cross with Marcus. To
her he was still her big child and sometimes she was amazed to find him a tall
and handsome man. "Will Mr. Sebastian be coming again? With his boyfriend?"

She spoke slowly as if she had to sort out the words in her mind. For fifteen
years she had known that Marcus was gay but she couldn't quite get used to it.
She would much more enjoy the house if it was full of children and a wife she
could spoil. But this would apparently never happen. She sighed and opened the
fridge.

   "Here," Marcus held out a sheet. "I have made a list of what we need. And
by the way, if Sebastian comes or not shouldn't bother you. I know you cannot
forgive him in "making me gay", right, Anna?"

His look was serious and Anna flinched a bit. She protested, "I never thought,
..."

   "It's OK. I know, you only did your job."

Anna bit her lips. He would never forgive her for this. She recalled briefly
the morning fifteen years ago as she stepped into Marcus' room to wake him up
and found him and ... this Sebastian in an embrace she never wanted to see
again. And shocked as she was she had to run to his parents to tell them her
new discovery. All these years it had stood unspoken between both of them -
Marcus and her - and that he mentioned it now all of a sudden made her feel
slightly dizzy. Unsteadily she grabbed for the sheet of paper.

   "Iceberg lettuce, tinned tomatoes, spaghetti, oregano, rosemary, Parma ham,
asparagus, smoked salmon?" she read out loud.

   "What shall I do with all these things?"

   "Nothing, Anna. Just buy it. And don't buy the wrapped salmon, pick some
fresh from the fish shop."

Anna looked confused at Marcus. From the fridge she pulled out the casserole
with the stuffed cabbage leaves from two days before and held it accusingly
under Marcus' nose. "Our little Nick is pretty spoilt, isn't he? Since when
you don't like my cabbage leaves?"

   "Of course I like it, but he had other things in mind."

Unnerved he sat at the kitchen table. "Come on, Anna, I don't want to have an
argument with you. After all, you are here to serve me, and if I say I want
tinned tomatoes then just do me the favour, OK?"

   "Yes." Anna took the cabbage leaves, wrapped them in old paper and threw
them into the trash bin. "If that's what you want. So what am I going to cook
today?"

   "Nothing. Just do the chores, please. I have to make some calls and be out
of the house soon."




Nicholas saw Ben coming down the hall and waited until he was near enough.
"Morning, Ben. I want to apologize for yesterday afternoon."

Ben didn't even give him a glance as he swept by. Nicholas was confused and
then a bit angry. "Hey, I'm talking to you!" he called after him. Ben turned
and came back. "So what do you want to say? Say it and then let me go."

His hazel eyes were almost black and the glasses mirrored dangerously the
light from the hall windows.

   "Of course it wasn't right of Marcus to ask you such things, I mean,"

   "You mean about rough sex? Indeed, I don't understand what he meant by
it. I am not keen on Sado-Masochism or something if that's what he meant."
He came even closer. "And Frank told me some interesting things about you."

Nicholas stepped back. "What things?" His voice trembled a bit.

   "You know very well what I'm talking about."

Nicholas ran his fingers through is hair. "Tell me," he said.

Ben was amazed. "You want to hear it? You have forgotten all about the
blackmail attempt and that was the reason you left the Academy?"

Nicholas thought he had missed something.

   "Blackmail?" He raised his left eyebrow. But then he had to laugh. "That's
absurd!" He shook his head in disbelief. This Frank was incalculable and ...
baffling in his fantasy.

   "Ok, Ben," he said more calmly. "Tell me all about the blackmail." He
grabbed Ben's arm and dragged him into a corner of the hall. "I would hate to
lose you as a friend on account of Frank."

   "Nick. I can understand you were in love with Frank. I am too. But it's
not right to blackmail somebody you love actually to get love from him. That's
absurd, as you said rightly."

   "So I have blackmailed him, aha. And why should I have done it? What was
the reason?"

   "Of course you wanted to complain to the police. Intercourse with
students."

Slowly it dawned on Nicholas. That bitch Frank!

   "OK," he said loudly. "Now, what you are going to do? Go and visit Frank
at his flat and get fucked by him? I wish you great pleasure." He lifted his
hands as if to repulse him. "No, no, don't worry, I won't tell anybody and
Marcus won't either. Have fun."

He stepped closer again. "One thing: he's not what he seems to be, you are
blinded by love, let me tell you this. I like you very much. But if you think
I could do such a stupid things as to try to blackmail Frank I'm sorry for you.
Now if you wish you can begin a hot love affair with your teacher, right?" He
paused a moment and peered intently into Ben's eyes. "Stop wishing, Ben. It
could come true." And with this he left Ben and went into the work room.

For the next two hours Ben didn't say a word. He followed Frank's instructions
but did no more then was demanded. Nicholas left Ben alone and spent more time
with Kalle and his struggles with the right implementation of the coloured
circle. He gave him tips how he could smudge out a strong and wrong coloured
line and the result was enlightening for Kalle.

Of course Frank didn't understand the strange behaviour of both young men and
wondered what was going on. During the break he approached Ben and asked him
to come after the lessons to his flat. Ben agreed.

Five hours later Ben stood in front of Nicholas' paintings. He knew he would
never be able to draw lines so freely, to fill them with the correct colours
and it seemed to him as if Frank's ice-blue eyes pierced him from the wall.

   "Our Nick has a great talent. Am I right?" he heard Frank's voice behind
him.

   "Yes, you are right." He sensed Frank's body-heat behind him and smelled
his aftershave. "I believe you've had a row with your friend, haven't you?"
He put one hand on Ben's shoulder.

   "Come, turn around."

Ben did and gazed into Frank's blue eyes. "I guess he told you I'm a liar and
everything I said was my own invention, right?"

Ben nodded and Frank grinned. "But I swear he was in love with me, perhaps
still is and is only jealous because now you are with me."

Ben swallowed. "At least he promised me he wouldn't tell anybody about you
and me. About us."

Frank stepped even closer. "So what is between you and me, Ben?"

   "I don't know," Ben dropped his head. But then he looked up again. "What's
between you and me, Frank? I don't know how you feel, but I..." He lifted his
hands to Frank's shoulders, outlined the upper arms and let them rest at his
waist, just above the belt of his trousers. His fingers weren't trembling as
if he was no longer afraid, but firmly gripped the body and fumbled with the
belt, unfastened it and pulled down the zipper of Frank's dark blue jeans.

Frank's eyes widened. He didn't like it when somebody else took the initiative
over him, so he pushed Ben's hands away.

   "Is that what you want, you little slut?" he hissed.

   "Yeah," Ben answered with the same voice. "Do it."

Frank took him by the arm and pulled him away to his bedroom. Ben was amazed
when he saw the pictures filling the walls, pictures of strong men in heavy
leather gear, unzipped trousers, showing their erect, large cocks, jerking
off with distorted, extreme facial expressions, but the longer he looked at
them, the more excited he got. He pulled at Frank's T-Shirt, ripping it as he
did so, and struggled to get rid of his own jeans. Frank tore down his pants,
took off his glasses and his grip on Ben's balls was painful.

He sat on the unmade bed and with one long and deep rush he sucked his penis
into his mouth and Ben cried out in pain because Fran'ks fingers were
squeezing his balls, creeping further to find his hole and trying to pierce
it. He struggled to escape but the sucking mouth sent so much pleasure through
his body that he couldn't scarcely move and tried to spread his legs to avoid
the burning pain as Frank shoved his finger into his arse hole.

But then something flushed through his mind and he dove his fingers into
Frank's shoulders and pushed him away. Frank's teeth grazed the sensitive
skin of his penis and once more he suppressed a cry. Frank fell backwards
onto the sheets. Naked and somewhat vulnerable he laid there, his legs spread
and ready for Ben.

Before Frank could think clearly, Ben was over him at full length, spreading
his legs even further and pushing a spit-wetted finger into Frank's hole which
caused Frank to give a sharp gasp and he shouted, "Stop it, man! I'm not the
one who get's fucked!"

He tried to escape but Ben's finger pushed deeper and the pain increased.
"You never get fucked?" Ben's face was flushed and he was hardly aware of
what he was doing or saying. He only felt the wriggling, fighting body under
him and he felt such a desperate urge to shove his cock deep into Frank's
bowels that he almost lost his mind.

Almost.

With a jolt he rose and released his grip on Frank's body who used the
opportunity to creep higher until he reached the top of the bed where he sat
with his knees pulled to his chin and stared panting and full of hate at Ben's
swinging, erect cock between his legs.

Ben slowly regained consciousness. His face turned bright red, then he jumped
from the bed, gathered his clothes and disappeared into the living room. After
two minutes Frank heard the door slamming.

Ben ran aimlessly through the overcrowded streets, hardly aware where he went,
but occasionally registering the odd looks of people who stared into his
tear-stained face. He wiped them away and stopped suddenly. One deep sniff
and he cleared his nose. What had actually happened? Why had he stopped and
fled? What was wrong with the encounter? Wrong in that he was willing to fuck
Frank but he didn't like it?  He had to think about this, perhaps talk to
someone about it. Ben had always thought of himself as a bottom but suddenly
the urge to lie on top of the strong-minded Frank with his complacent grin and
to feel him helpless beneath him had turned him on so much that he had almost
exploded. Slowly he walked on, past rushing people on their way back home,
doing shopping, looking forward to meeting their families.

The setting sun was hidden behind thin veils of clouds.

But had he ever wished that sex could be so ... rough? More than just passion?
Nicholas' words flooded through his mind ... "he's not what he seems to be"...
how could he have known?

But then all was clear to Ben. He dabbed at his forehead, wiping away the
sweat which had built up there. Nick must have been through the same
experience. Of course he was in love with Frank, that might be true. But the
rest was surely wrong, Frank was lying. He hadn't tried to blackmail him, but
Frank had obviously lost his control and the fuck had been painful - more than
painful. So painful indeed, that Nick had left the Academy to be as far away
as he could from his abuser.

Marcus was certainly the complete opposite; he radiated warmth and his smile
was open and genuine. "What a jerk I am!" he shouted out loud. People looked
at him uncomprehending but he grinned and bared his teeth. Now he was in the
mood to turn back to Frank's flat and shout into his face what an arsehole he
was.


                           ~~~


   "Nick? Are you here?" Marcus had just unlocked the door to his house.
Because he heard nothing he ran upstairs taking two steps at once. He found
Nicholas kneeling in front of the fireplace with  the marble bust of Augustus
between his knees and outlining with his fingers the delicate carved, young
face. Marcus stood in the doorway and stared at him. "Don't do this again,
Nicholas! I was scared shitless as I waited and waited and you didn't show up!"
His voice had a mixture of relief and anger.

But then he knelt beside him. "Is something wrong?"

Nicholas looked up and shook his head. "I'm only confused."

Slowly it began to dawn on him that he had upset Marcus and his face became
pale. "Shit, Marcus. I forgot that you always pick me up. I'm so sorry." His
eyes were dark with unspoken pleading.

Marcus let his breath out in an audible sigh. "Ok, honey. But promise me you
won't ever do it again. I had almost a heart attack! I saw you under a car or
in the ambulance or kidnapped!"

Marcus had to laugh and Nicholas joined him for a while, but then his face
became sad again.

   "So why are you so confused, tell me."

   "It's Ben. I told you that we had a row yesterday and I haven't spoken to
him for almost the entire day.  And then he disappeared and I guess he went
to Frank's place. Frank didn't show up today. Called in sick."

   "Sick?"

Nicholas nodded.

   "But what's about Ben? Still not talking to him?"

   "But yes. I pestered him to tell me what's going on, but he wouldn't give
me an answer!"

   "Hm." Marcus' hand stroked over the cool and smooth surface of the marble
bust.

   "And then I called my mother," Nicholas words came to his ears.

Marcus waited for Nicholas to continue, but he remained silent.

   "What about your mother?" he asked softly.

   "She's unhappy because of me."

A little moan escaped Marcus throat. "Darling, it's not your fault." He
grabbed Nicholas and pulled him into his arms. "Your parents quarrel because
of you, right?"

Nicholas' sniffed a bit. "Why can't he accept me for what I am? I do no harm
to anybody I just ... I just love a man, that's all."

   "Shh," Marcus stroked Nicholas' hair. "I know how you feel. I know it. I
had the same fight with my parents years ago."

He lifted Nicholas' chin and looked deep into his blue, blurred eyes. "It will
be all right some day, believe me. Of course you aren't doing any harm. It's
just ... it's ... society which demands couples of a different gender. But
this shouldn't bother us. It is as it is. And I'm very happy as it is."

He wiped a tear from the corner of Nicholas' eye. "Better? I'm with you and
there's nothing to be afraid of. Some day your father will see that you haven't
changed, that you are still the little boy he always loved. And perhaps then
he will like me too."

   "But it isn't only that you are gay, Marcus. You don't fit with us. Fit
him. His upbringing. He thinks rich people are useless."

Marcus laughed. "Well, some of them are indeed useless. But many spend their
money doing useful things. I give a good part of it to the Academy you're
attending."

   "Do you?" Nicholas was surprised. "You didn't mention that before."

Marcus laughed quietly. "I don't belong to those rich people who show their
charity on a large label around their necks, or deduct from the taxes what
they have done. I do it because I enjoy it."

Nicholas smiled. "That's a good thing. I'm happy about it." Marcus stood up
and massaged his aching knees.

   "Well, there's nothing we can do for the moment for Ben, so you'll see him
on Monday. I guess it'll all clear up, don't you think." He pulled Nicholas
to his feet. "Do you think he slept with Frank?" he asked then.

Nicholas shrugged and looked unhappy. Marcus planted a quick kiss at his lips.
"Come, let me see a happy face again. We are invited to Sebastian's this
evening."

   "Sebastian?" Nicholas' voice sounded a bit shrill.

   "Not in the mood?" Marcus frowned a bit. "He'll soon be going back to Rome
and taking Kay with him for holiday or so he told me on the phone."

   "And Simon?"

   "Well, he promised he'd make a last try this weekend, but then he's off."

   "And Kay will give up, too? I can't believe it."

   "Honey. Kay will return and in the meantime we can search around a bit. If
you want to, that is."

   "Of course."

Marcus smiled. "Now what shall we do until then?"

He bent down to lift the Augustus bust and put it back on the mantelpiece.
"How's your hand actually?"

Nicholas stretched and closed his hand. "All right. Almost like new."

   "Good! Then show me what you have learned today."

   "Ah come on, don't play teacher, Marcus. I've had enough of it today."

He embraced Marcus and began to kiss his lips, pushing him into the bathroom
and saying half laughing, "We have to prepare for the big dinner, darling."




Kay, in Sebastian's well-equipped kitchen, eyed the ingredients for the dinner.
It was almost 7:30 pm; Nick and Marcus would arrive at any minute. Curiously
he lifted the plate what covered a bowl and found dark green plants,
resembling Schachtelhalm.

   "Hands off!" Sebastian called from the door. He stuffed his pale green
shirt into his tight trousers and embraced Kay from behind.

   "Are we going to eat THIS?" Kay asked, "I'm not a rabbit, you know."

Sebastian laughed. "I doubt that rabbits would eat this."

He chewed at his earlobe with the golden ring. "What sort of replacement has
the shop found for you? Cute as you?"

Kay laughed. "Perhaps! Haven't seen him."

The bell rang at the front door and Sebastian rushed to answer it.

Nicholas couldn't decide if he was pleased to see Sebastian again, but as he
stood in front of him and sensed the erotic feeling his body was oozing, he
felt slightly weak in his legs, but Kay's cheerful greeting made him forget
this.

Kay dragged him into the kitchen and looked at his hand. "Where's the bandage?"

    "Gone. It's almost ok. I can draw and write again."

   "Good news." Kay beamed and looked him up and down. "You have put on a bit
of weight, sweetie."

Nicholas frowned. "Is it bad?"

Kay laughed. "No, no. It looks good. Very sexy!" He gave him a light tap on
his tight buttocks and Nicholas squealed a bit.

   "Look what we are supposed to eat." Kay lifted the plate again and held a
green Schachtelhalm in front of Nicholas' eyes.

   "Heavens, Kay! Put it back and get back into the living room," Sebastian
shouted grinning. "Ask Marcus what he wants to drink."

Kay disappeared and Sebastian turned to look into Nicholas' embarrassed face.
Sebastian stepped closer. "How are you?" he asked softly. "How's your hand?"

   "Good. All is well."

   "I'm sure Marcus told you we are off to Rome next week?"

   "Yes." Nicholas threw a shy look to the other man. "And what about Simon?
Marcus said we could both look for him until Kay returns .... he will return,
yes?"

   "Would you miss him?"

   "Sure I would." Nicholas wanted to go badly but Sebastian's broad back
blocked the entrance. Sebastian sensed that Nicholas was uncomfortable and
asked, "I hope you will tell us all about the Academy, Nicki, will you?"

Nicholas nodded and was relieved when Kay showed up again and asked what he
wanted to drink.

   "And what do we do with these?" Kay asked as soon as Nicholas had gone.

   "You can go and bring me Marcus while you amuse  Nicki." He held back Kay
at his belt. "It doesn't mean I want to find both of you on the carpet doing
naughty things, understand?"

Kay burst out in laughter and rushed away.

While the water boiled, Sebastian took the very thin veal fillets and covered
them with a slice of Parma ham and basil. Marcus put spaghetti into water and
watched Sebastian's skillful hands.

   "Nicki seems to be a bit confused, have you noticed?" Sebastian asked while
he put the shrimps into the hot garlic-oil to roast.

   "Yes, I know. It's because of Frank and all that shit."

Sebastian looked at him. "Oh yes, you mentioned it. So how does the story
of Ben and Frank continue?"

   "We don't know. This morning Frank was off sick and Ben wouldn't speak to
Nicholas. But he too was very confused as it seems."

Sebastian shook his head. "Must be a real arsehole this Frank. I can't
understand how a man could fall in love with him."

   "Think what you're saying," Marcus said, "Nicholas was in love with him
too, have you forgotten? I guess he wears something like a mask. He's
agreeable to everybody but only if you know him better you can see what's
behind that mask."

   "I understand. And you believe that Ben has had a look behind it, yes?"

   "Yes."

Sebastian pulled out the shrimps, took the strange, green stems and threw
them into the oil, shoved them back and forth while Marcus poured out the
spaghetti.

   "Put it in the big bowl, please. It's finished already."



   "Now explain to us please what this is," Kay said eyeing the dishes
standing on the round table in the living room.

Sebastian filled his plate full of spaghetti, added the green stems and
covered it all with shrimps.

   "Have a taste."

Kay picked it up cautiously and chewed at the crispy consistency. Then his
face lit up. "It's salty and fishy, but great!"

Marcus and Sebastian laughed, "Now you, Nicki."

Nicholas found it very strange but tasty. "What is it?"

   "Passepierre algae, looks indeed like thick Schachtelhalm."

   "Algae?"

   "Yes, algae. You can mix it with sweet carrots too, it's delicious!"

Kay munched at his spaghetti and his plate was empty in no time.

Sebastian wiped his mouth, drank a bit from his wine and asked, "Now, Nicki,
tell us a bit of your lessons. Learned a lot?"

   "Um, yes. It's all right."

   "That doesn't sound too delightful." He exchanged a look with Marcus.

   "You know about Frank, yes? Well, it's not pleasant to work with him again,
as you can imagine."

Kay stared at him with pity in his eyes. "Has he molested you again?"

   "No. It's .... can I have some more of this algae, please?"

Sebastian put some on his almost empty plate. "It's ok, Nicki, you don't have
to talk about it, if you don't want to. I only want to know if you are
enjoying the lessons, no matter who the teacher is. What about your
classmates?"

   "Ok. Some of them recognized me from the exhibition."

Kay raised his eyebrows. "So they know you are gay?"

Nicholas nodded.

   "Is that a problem?"

   "No. Absolutely not. There's a guy "Walt", actually Walter-Udo, who is the
nephew of the minister for culture. But he can't draw at all."

Kay laughed, amused. "So? And what does he do if he can't draw at all?"

Nicholas shrugged his shoulders. "As long as he gets preferential treatment
from his uncle and he supports the Academy nobody can do anything about him."

Sebastian rolled his eyes. "Everywhere's the same. If you have the right
connections you can do what you want. Nobody can touch you."

Marcus nodded.

   "But what's about you? You support the Academy too," Sebastian said,
"can't you use your influence to dismiss this Frank?"

   "How can I do that? I'm not the headmaster of the school. And anyway I
don't like doing such things. They must solve their problems for themselves."

Nicholas stared at Marcus. "But that's an idea, Marcus. If he did bad things
to Ben then you could give him the sack."

Marcus looked uneasy. "Let's wait and see what happens, honey. We can think
about it later, ok?"

   "Any new strange incidents happened in the meantime?" Sebastian asked.

   "No", Nicholas answered. "Fortunately they seem to have stopped. Perhaps
it was all stupid coincidences, don't you think so?"

   "Certainly I hope so." He emptied his glass. "Now, everybody ready for the
second course?"

   "Phew, so soon?" Kay patted his stomach. "I'll have to wait until there's
some more room for the next course."

Nicholas drank his lightly sweet and fruity tasting Californian wine and
slowly felt himself relax. He looked at Sebastian who had combed back his
glossy, sandy hair and rolled up the long sleeves of his pale green shirt.
He still remembered the feel of his body, the soft fine hair of his chest and
legs stroking his own skin and felt a stir in his groin. His cheeks coloured
briefly and he looked away, but Sebastian had sensed the look and looked
questioningly into Nicholas turned face.

Each time he was confused at his nearness and he asked himself if he would
rather have Nicki as his companion to Rome or Kay. Kay was so different from
Nick, so cheerful and without that sense of sadness, but Nicholas' melancholy
had something touching. He knew very well that Nicki could be thoroughly happy
and carefree but there was something in his upbringing and environment that
had made him sad, serious and in a way more adult than Kay perhaps ever would
be.

Sebastian poured himself more wine and drank before he got up and went into
the kitchen to look for the veal. There he threw all his scruples to the wind
and just decided he wanted to enjoy the evening. A relaxed evening amongst
friends.

He heated the pan with some butter and oil and put the fillets in, took out
of the fridge the already cooked spinach and warmed it a bit in a saucepan.
It didn't take long before everything was ready and he carried the plates into
the living room.




The evening was cold and a nasty wind was blowing which drove clouds across
the sky as Frank went upstairs from the underground to the day-bright
illuminated railway station, Zoo. Large walls full of neon signs dazzled
both him and the tourists on their way to several restaurants, Irish pubs
and peep shows. Briefly a big yellow bus disturbed his gaze at the big Zoo-
Palace cinema where young people stood in a queue to watch the announced film,
"Shakespeare in Love" as Frank read narrowing his eyes. He passed sex-cinemas,
an Asian food shop, a Turkish Kebab-seller and the stench of garlic followed
him until the next corner where he crossed the street to get into the large,
grimy station hall. It had been recently freshly renovated, but it still
couldn't hide what it was: the most famous prostitution centre for whores and
male hustlers, heroin junkies and dealers.

Frank cautiously touched the long, red scratch across his left cheek - a nice
keepsake from Ben last night. Frank laughed grimly to himself. Ben! He had
returned after the failed pass and as Frank looked into his angry face he knew
that he hadn't returned to get fucked by him, but to argue.

He never had been so randy for someone like Ben in the past months and
Nicholas had been the last of his pupils he had fucked. But Ben was something
special, apparently innocent outwardly but he could be steel hard if he was
crossed. And he had let Frank feel it. He wasn't sure how much Nicholas had
told him, but Ben certainly knew something that only Nicholas could know or
he had simply guessed correctly.

Frank turned right to the toilets and entered the long passage which was
soiled with filth, paper towels, a pair of old shoes, a torn umbrella and he
smelled the sharp stench of urine covered by the citrus smell of the air
freshener.

Ben had asked him bluntly if he had done the same with Nick as he wanted
apparently to do with himself ... rough sex without mercy and if he would
get his satisfaction from this.

Frank giggled. If he only knew! If somebody knew that he fucked Walter-Udo's
uncle, the big shot in the ministry! And that certainly without mercy but with
whips and leather masks ...

Frank sighed suddenly. But this was becoming less now, Herbert, Walt's uncle,
was afraid for his job and his reputation so Frank had to find another guy
with whom he could indulge his fantasies.

Ben had insisted on an answer and when Frank had admitted he had had fun with
Nick, Ben had flipped. He had attacked him all of a sudden and the results
were bruised ribs, where Ben's foot had hit him and the long scratch in his
face. But after the first pain had subsided, Frank was got up from the ground
with a very hard cock but it was too late to throw Ben onto the bed and to
fuck him like mad, because he had already slammed the door behind him.

Frank passed several hustlers standing in small groups in front of the door
to the toilets. He eyed them but nobody seemed to catch his interest. He
entered a lavatory, had a piss and washed his hands as his look in the mirror
fell on a single guy standing in the corner and seeming to be watching him
carefully.

Frank began to grin and the guy reciprocated. He sized him up and down and
saw he was dressed neatly in jeans and a T-shirt under a thin wind cheater
although he seemed to be cold. His brown, curly hair hung over his eyes and
when he smiled, two deep dimples appeared in his cheeks. Frank turned and
stepped closer to the boy.

   "You want stuff or a fuck?" the lad asked, his small face suddenly serious.

   "What stuff?"

   "Anything you want."

   "What about cocaine?"

   "What about both? Stuff and a fuck?" the lad said. "Two hundred."

   "Whoa, boy. Are you sure you are worth it?"

   "Depends on what you want me to do. I do anything."

Frank began to tremble and the erection in his trousers grew.

   "Anything?" he echoed. "Give me the stuff first."

The boy pulled out a little plastic bag full of white powder and handed it
to Frank. He opened the bag carefully, dipped his finger in and tasted. "Good."
Then he gazed deeply into the lad's brown, a bit dark ringed eyes. "Want to
come with me?"

   "Where?"

   "My home."

The boy looked him up and down. Everybody had warned him never to go with a
stranger but this didn't matter to him. He had nothing to lose anymore.

   "Full night? Three hundred."

   "Ok."

Both went along the dirty corridor, passed neglected young girls with hair
all colours of the paint box, sleeping curled together with their big dogs
or sitting on the floor and inhaling their pot.

   "Simon!"

The young lad turned to another boy. "Where are you going?"

   "Be back tomorrow. Don't worry. Hope you find somebody soon." He waved
and carried on.

   "So your name is Simon. I'm Frank."

   "Hi Frank."



Frank's mind was clear as a bright summer meadow, he could see the colours
changing their brightness, glowing in the darkness of his mind and exploding
into fantastic formations. This time he had certainly taken too much of this
damn cocaine; he could scarcely manage to think as he lay outstretched on the
dishevelled blankets of his bed. He tried to figure out what the time was,
certainly shortly before dawn. He peered at the other side of the bed to find
Simon lying there, in a rather contorted position he knew he was alright, only
tired after their long night. He felt a slightly twitch in his penis as he
touched it. Certainly over-taxed. Frank grinned. But this boy was insatiable.
His cock rose again and Frank didn't pay attention the little pain it caused.
He heaved his body up and rolled onto his side, watching the uncovered, small
body next to him, crept over him, lifted his legs apart and shoved his cock in
one smooth motion and without care or thought deep into Simon's bowels.

Simon woke and gave a sharp gasp but since he still was filled enough with
semen and lube it didn't hurt too much. He lay there and watched Frank's red,
sweating face, the ice blue eyes closed, heard him grunting, felt him moving
frantically in and out and suddenly Simon felt nausea. He almost threw up all
over his body and the blankets. Frank didn't notice, he shoved his cock deeply
into Simon's body and with a loud cry he came, frozen for a moment and pulling
out his cock a moment later. He lifted his body from Simon's without a look or
word, stood up and went with tottering legs into the bathroom.

Simon slowly got some peace. He felt cum dribbling out of his abused, sore
anus and the nausea increased. His head was still swimming with pot and
cocaine. Suddenly he jumped up and rushed into the bathroom where he vomited
into the toilet. He heard the water splashing from the shower, rinsed his
mouth and then tried to clean his crack a bit. Then he shuffled back into
the bedroom and discovered Frank's wallet, lying at a sideboard. He took the
money, counted it, dressed and left the flat.



Marcus awoke in the arms of Nicholas' who had him tightly pressed around his
body from behind. He felt his body warmth and was happy that every morning he
could wake up with his young lover. Carefully he turned on his back and held
one of Nicholas' hand in his. He began to think about Kay and Sebastian and
knew that both of them were getting on well together.  Marcus decided his
friend was more happy than he had been for ages. He was glad about this. Very
glad. Kay was a charming lad and in love with Sebastian it seemed. Certainly
both would have a great time in Rome. Marcus was even a bit envious. He too
would have liked to have had a short holiday with Nicholas, no matter where,
the main thing just to be alone with him, without annoying Anna, who always
put her nose into every matter she thought was her concern. Well at least for
the weekend they were free from her presence and he knew that Nicholas was
looking forward to this time.

He felt Nicholas stirring and murmuring quietly words he didn't understand.
Marcus squeezed the hand he was still holding and whispered, "Morning, angel.
Have you anything special in mind for today?"

He peered at the pulled curtains and could see some tiny sunbeams seeping
through the blinds. "It seems as if the sun is shining. What do you say to a
little trip outside the city?"

   "Huh?" Nicholas muttered sleepily and stretched his body. "Ask me again
when I'm awake."

Marcus smiled. "Ok, sunshine. While you are deciding whether to get up or not
I'll make us coffee, allright?"

He planted a kiss on Nicholas' forehead and stood up.


                                   ~~~

The sweat ran down his back and made his new white T-shirt sticky. The mood
in the 'Nightfactory' was at its height and Simon had already done good
business. Together with the contents of Frank's wallet he had earned a small
fortune.

He leaned against the damp wall in the farthest corner of the room and watched
the dancing men, most of them had already taken off their shirts and vests and
Simon asked himself how many of them were available for a one-night stand.
Real couples seldom came to this club - the same as in every club where Simon
sold his stuff and ass. At the memory the pain returned. He didn't think that
he would sell his ass tonight - or tomorrow night. The mere thought of Frank's
insatiable cock made him sick, but the rustling notes, well hidden in his belt,
were compensation enough.

He smiled as familiar faces passed by but wasn't in the mood to follow them.
At the moment he felt depressed. How had he ever thought that this life he was
now leading could him make forget his own death warrant he had black on white.
It was only a matter of time before the disease would break out and then Simon
wanted to be prepared. He hadn't the intention to languish until he died.
Never.  He couldn't forget his sorrow by becoming a hustler and dealer and
the encounters with all the strange men had only added to his sorrow. In a
few months time he had seen all, men in their middle age, stroking with
trembling hands over his buttocks and penis, sucking him off fervently and
leaving more money than he had demanded. Young, dashing managers or business
men coming for a short fuck between two conferences or during their lunch
break. It all depended on which place he took up his position. He always had
chances, so long he looked good, his clothes were clean, the hair glossy and
his complexion healthy. With the money from his deals he was able to rent a
little flat and he played with the thought of advertising in the newspaper to
welcome his clients at home.

Simon sipped at his Coke. This Frank must have been insane. He had fucked him
without a condom - over and over again. Perhaps the stuff was responsible,
perhaps not. Anyway. Simon didn't care. Everybody was responsible for his own
life. Probably he would never see him again.

Simon narrowed his eyes and tried to focus on someone who looked familiar. He
peered over the backs of the dancing men to the bar, saw him talking to Alfred,
the barkeeper. The flickering light shone on his sandy hair. He had his arm
around another young man's waist and Simon made an almost instinctive step
forward to get closer until it was clear to him. It was Kristian, his brother,
he was pretty sure. If it were possible, Simon became more hot and he suddenly
felt a lump in his throat. And the other man was Sebastian... Simon wondered
briefly how both had came together.

But then the memory of Marcus was so overwhelming that he had to turn his
face. Without hesitation he left the club.

   "Where, did you say?" Sebastian concentrated his gaze over the heads of the
dancers into the darkness of the opposite walls.

   "Come, let's go. He's certainly somewhere there." Kay dragged him with
him, first across the dance floor, along the wall and then to the toilets.
They disturbed couples in tight embraces but Simon wasn't there. Kay once more
pulled out his picture, but was told Simon had been there until a few minutes
ago but now nobody knew his whereabouts. They parted and searched for another
twenty minutes, occasionally turning back to Alfred, but Simon seemed to be
gone for the night.


To be continued			

That's all for this year I'm afraid. I would love to hear from you, so why
not send me email? Take care,
Stefan