Date: Tue, 18 Jul 2023 09:50:34 -0400
From: Rufus Jones <jonesrufus64@gmail.com>
Subject: To Places Unknown 1

To Places Unknown 1
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The Van Horne had docked in New York to pick up cargo and some new crew
since a few of us had enough of wandering back and forth from New York to,
well, all over the place. Cargo ships are like cities: vast and anonymous
with a crew whose only purpose was to make sure everything worked and that
the cargo was secure. In big storms, we had to constantly check to make
sure everything remained where it was supposed to be.

But there were long periods with not much to do, especially if the ocean
was calm. My previous roommate, Tom, had decided to call it quits. He
wanted to spend time actually relating to people rather than just hang
around with a bunch of guys talking shit and doing mundane work. I couldn't
blame him, really. I was twenty-eight and had been on the ships since I
left home at nineteen. Mostly to get away from my father who was and
probably still is, an asshole. His idea of a meaningful conversation with
his kids was to talk with his fist. So when I came of age, I told him to
screw himself and left.

But even though I couldn't blame Tom for leaving, I knew I didn't want to
go back to the real world -- at least not yet. I knew I was going to miss
the guy. We shared a little cabin -- among dozens of little cabins on the
ship. Ours didn't have once of those communal bunkhouse things and I was
sure glad of that. I like my privacy, and Tom respected that. We didn't
talk much, but we had a kind of easy thing going that made if really
comfortable. No big conversations, no fighting, no drunken nights. We just
worked and hung out playing cards.

So I missed the guy. I hadn't ever been in a relationship and I rarely had
friends. My dad taught me that it wasn't worth really knowing other
people. It didn't even cross my mind to wonder if something was missing. Oh
sure, I jacked off like any guy, but not very often, and frankly, I didn't
know what all the fuss was about. It felt nice and all, but after it was
over, there was just a sticky mess I had to wipe up with whatever I could
grab. Tom, on the other hand, seemed to have his hand on his dick all the
time. I asked him once what that was all about and he looked at me like I
had three heads.

"Man, it's about the chicks, right? I mean come on...you whack off, I hear
you sometimes. What goes through your head when your beating it?"

I realized I had no idea what he was talking about. I learned from Tom that
other guys actually think about sex with actual people. When I jerked off
it was just about the feelings. It was nice and passed some time and then
it was over. I started to wonder if there was something wrong with me.

So when Tom left, the only person I really talked to was gone and I
wondered who would replace him. And I felt lonely the second he was
gone. That surprised me since I hadn't missed any of the people I had left
behind before -- like my father and my brother, other friends on other
ships.

My brother is a good guy, don't get me wrong, but our way of dealing with
our fuck-up of a dad was to retreat to our rooms and never talk. I hear
that other siblings kind of band together if they're living with nut-bars
for parents, but that's not what Sid and I did. He's a year younger than me
and we were often mistaken for twins. But while I'm quiet and don't talk
much, he's the opposite. I think his way of dealing with dad was to turn up
the volume on his personality. We all have to survive however we survive.

So I was lying in my bunk the afternoon we were docked in New York. I knew
there was somebody replacing Tom, and I was uncomfortable. Who would it be?
I hoped he wasn't an asshole. It would be a guy. Women never take these
jobs and frankly, they would be crazy to. A woman in this place would get
eaten alive.

I was almost dozing off when the door to our little cabin opened and in
walked a tall guy with shaggy brown hair. His eyes were bright blue and he
looked about twelve.

"Hey, you must be Stu. Greg, nice to meet you." He walked over to the bunk
and extended a big, muscular hand. I looked at him for a moment, inwardly
groaning. Fuck. The chatty type. I could always tell. But I played nice
since we were going to be living at close quarters for who the fuck knew
how long.

"Yup, I'm Stu. You can put your stuff in the bottom drawer." I pointed to a
small dresser, which was the only other furniture in the room. You can't
fit much in a ten by twelve cabin except beds.

"Thanks man." He threw his bag on the other bed and sat down. "This is a
big fuckin' mother of a ship."

I had to laugh. "Yeah, and this is only medium sized."

His eyes got bigger. "Fuck...!" He looked around the cabin as if looking
for something. "Pretty bare these cabins, huh?"

"There's not much need for decorations around here."

He turned to me and laughed. "I guess. So...the head guy...what's his name?
Anyway, he said you would show me around and tell me what I'm supposed to
do."

I sighed inside. Fuck. "You've never done this before, I guess?"

He looked sheepish. "Naw. I just graduated from college and wanted to see
some of the world and this seemed like a good way to do it and make some
cash while I'm at it."

"Well you'll see a lot of cargo, and a shit-load of water. But yeah, when
we get to the next destination, you'll have a chance to look around before
we head off again."

This was true. I'd seen a bunch of the world I never would have seen
otherwise, so I got why he was there. I looked at his hair which was wavy
and hung down to his shoulders in a kind of budget rock-star kind of
way. Mine was always buzzed short so I was almost surprised. I decided to
give him a tour.

I gave him the quick tour, since with a ship this big, a detailed one would
take a week. We saw one of the cargo bays which are like fucking football
stadiums, especially when they're empty. I showed him the mess hall, the
lounges, the bathrooms. All the usual stuff on a ship like this. He seemed
eager and excited and it was almost infectious. I remember feeling that way
when I first got on a ship.

I introduced him to some of the guys and I noticed he had an easy way with
people and they liked him right away, even the old crusty ones who hated
everyone. I realized this boded well for him being my roommate. He seemed
to be easy to get along with and on a ship like this, that counts for a
lot.

We had dinner with some of the guys and then called it a night. Tomorrow
morning we had to get up really early because they were going to start
loading this fucker of a ship which took ages and we had to make sure
everything went smoothly.

That first day was a blur. Greg shadowed me and watched what I was
doing. He was keen and kept his eyes open. He was learning fast and within
a few hours, was actually being helpful. Another good sign. So the days
passed and eventually the ship was loaded and we left New York bound for
Southampton. Once the ship left the crew could relax after a shit-ton of
work.

Later, after we ate, Greg and I collapsed in our beds. I had a feeling he
would want to talk and all I wanted was to shut my eyes and be
gone. "Night." I shut off the light over my bed and turned on my side away
from him.

I woke up a few hours later and just stared at into the dark. I could hear
something and I knew right away what it was since I got used to Tom doing
it. Greg was jacking off. It's a total give-away and if someone thinks it's
not obvious, then they're pretty dim.

I listened for a while for some reason. I occasionally listened to Tom, but
for reasons I didn't think about, I lay there, the soft rhythm kind of
putting me into a trance. I realized I was getting hard, which was weird. I
ignored my cock and tried to fall asleep, but I couldn't. After a while, I
heard a quiet grunt and I knew he was done and I could relax. I fell
asleep, wondering why I needed to relax.

The next morning when my alarm went off, Greg was already up. He was lying
in his bunk reading.

"You read?" It was obvious, but no one on these ships read books.

"Yeah. It relaxes me."

"What is it?"

He held up the book. The cover had some kind of painting on it and said
Howard's End. I had no idea what that was, but it looked like something I
would never read. I decided not to say anything.

He looked at me for a moment. "You don't read much, I guess?"

"Naw. I read what I had to in high school, but after that...well I had
other things to worry about."

"Like what?"

He was the inquisitive type it seemed. "Oh you know. Trying to be an
adult. Deal with shit."

I hoped the conversation would end. "Shit?"

I sighed. I felt like I had to answer. He clearly was just asking and I
also realized I kind of wanted to say something after all. "Oh, my
family. I mean get the fuck away from them. Or at least my father. He's an
asshole."

He looked serious for a moment, glancing down at his hands. "I hear you. My
dad's a Christian asshole, which is way worse, if you ask me."

I laughed. "So you get it."

"I guess so."

It felt nice that we shared something. He looked over at me again, putting
his book down.

"So what do we do now?"

"You mean the ship? Well, not much. There's a schedule in the kitchen for
the rotation. You remember -- checking the holds, checking with the engine
rooms, that kind of shit. It doesn't take that long. I think you and I are
on for tonight."

"So we have the rest of the day to hang around?"

"Pretty much. You can read your book, we can play cards. There's a room off
the mess area with some weights and stuff if you're feeling like letting
off some steam."

"Cool." He picked up his book and started to read again.

"You had breakfast?"

He turned to me and said "Yeah. I went down a while ago."

"Well, I'm going to eat. Want anything?"

"No thanks."

I went to get breakfast and talked shit with some guys for a while. I
looked at my watch and it was ten but I felt like a nap, so I came back to
our cabin.

Greg was still reading, which surprised me. Whenever I read, which was
probably once a year, I could only manage about ten minutes.

"Hey. I'm going to take a nap. Don't mind me."

I lay down on my bed and closed my eyes and was asleep in seconds. On a
ship like this with shifts that could start at two in the morning or four
in the afternoon, you sleep whenever you feel like it.

I slowly became slowly became conscious and felt like I had been asleep for
ages. I lay with my eyes closed. Then I heard it. He was jacking off
again. In the middle of the day with me right beside him. I was kind of
stunned. The soft rhythm kind of lulled me almost back to sleep, but some
part of me wondered what I was supposed to do if I woke up. I turned my
head a little and opened my eyes just enough so that I could see Greg.

He was lying in the same position, his book beside him. His pants were down
around his knees and his shirt was off. He had his right hand on his cock,
which was surprisingly big. He was a slim guy, with not very much chest
hair. He had his head thrown back against the wall as his hand slid up and
down his dick. His other hand was fiddling with one of his nipples and his
breathing was heavy and loud.

I was kind of amazed that he was just doing it in the middle of the
day. And I was also amazed and in ways that I didn't understand, that I was
getting hard again. I decided to do something because I could feel myself
getting panicky. I cleared my throat and stretched my arms above my head as
if I was just waking up. His movements stopped.

I sat up, rubbing my eyes. I turned to him and decided to be cool. He was
sitting there holding his cock looking at me with a little smile on his
face.

"Oh I see you've been busy."

"Yeah. Sorry. I kind of hoped you would't wake up."

I chuckled. "It is like, the middle of the day."

"I know...but when the urge hits you...right?"

I didn't really understand, but I decided to be fine with it. I had to tear
my eyes away from his cock which was drooling into his fist. "I guess..."

"You mind if I finish?"

That got me. What? He was going to jerk off in front of me? "Uh...maybe I
should give you some privacy..."

"Oh come on. It'll just take a minute."

And he started to jack off again. I kind of froze on the bed but I couldn't
take my eyes off him, off his cock, off his chest. He started to pump and
little harder and his other hand was playing with his balls. I felt my own
cock getting rigid in my pants and I had to squirm a little so it didn't
get all bent out of shape. I wasn't used to having a hard-on in the middle
of the day, in my pants. This was supposed to be in the dark with nothing
on.

I kept watching him. I didn't know what else to do. His breathing was
getting ragged and his mouth opened a bit. His was tugging on his balls as
his hand slid on himself and then, with a gasp, he lifted his hips and
moaned as shot after shot of cum spurted out onto his neck, his chest. Some
even landed on his chin. When the last spurt poured out he turned to me
with a smile. "That was great." And he sighed and closed his eyes.

I was still frozen to my bed. I didn't want to move because my cock was
like iron in my pants and I couldn't imagine it wouldn't be obvious. What
the fuck? I was turned on and I had no idea why. I was never turned on like
this. I decided to play it cool.

"I hope everyone had a good time over there."

He laughed. "Sure did. You know how it feels."

The thing was, I didn't. Watching him pull his body up and just cover
himself with cum was not something I had any experience with. And in front
of someone...what was that all about?

"Yeah, sure. Good times." I tried to sound light and jokey. I was
sufficiently nervous that the blood finally left my cock for other
places. I had been staring at my hands and then I looked up to see him
licking the hand that was holding his cock. He was licking off the gobs of
cum from his fingers. I was stunned. People did that? It had never occurred
to me that someone would want to actually put in their mouth. But even
more, the idea kind of excited me. Again. My cock was getting interested,
so I decided to get up and move.

"Well, after all that excitement, I'm going take a walk. See you in a
bit. Don't forgot, we're on a six."

I looked down at him. His eyes were closed and he was just lying there,
covered in his cum. Then he said, "Sure. Have a good walk."

I walked for a while, trying not to think about what I had seen. But of
course it was all I could think about. I wasn't grossed out, which
surprised me. I wasn't angry, or annoyed. My cock was telling me there was
something interesting about it and that was the most confusing thing of
all. I had never given a second's thought to my sexuality. It's not like I
assumed I was straight. I didn't even get that far. The only thing that
seemed clear was that from time to time, I would jerk off. But never with
an actual person in mind. But watching Greg...was...interesting. The
thought sat for a moment, then I quickly distracted myself by decided to
check the state of the nearest cargo hold.

Part of me knew I was avoiding something, but a part of my brain that,
after a lifetime of not thinking about things, was really good at changing
the channel in my head. When I was a kid, it was my dad, in high school it
was getting by and trying not to be obvious and now...it was Greg. The
thought kept coming back. And his cock.

I came back close to six and he was dressed and ready to go. "Hey. It's
time for our shift."

He smiled his smile and we left. I could tell he was thinking something,
but I decided to take no notice. We worked mostly in silence for the next
number of hours. At this point in the trip, there wasn't much to do, but we
had to do all the inspections and make entries that we had done them. It
wasn't rocket science and Greg caught on fast.

We had some dinner and sat around with some guys playing cards and having a
drink. Greg continued to get along with everyone and was a bit of a ham. He
told jokes and stories and got everyone on his side. I started to
understand the approach he took that was different than mine. Whereas I
kept to myself and tried to be invisible, he set out to win everyone over
and he was successful. I wondered how bad things had been with his dad to
make him such a social genius.

I'm a cheap drunk, so after a couple of gin and tonics, I was feeling
loose, but a bit dozy. We went back to our cabin, talking more easily, and
I even got into the joking. It was fun and Greg was so easy to be around.

I flopped on my bed and put my hands behind my head, staring at the
ceiling. I heard Greg get onto his bed, then I heard his voice. "Hey man, I
hope you aren't freaked out about earlier."

I turned to him and our eyes met. Was I freaked out? I don't think that was
the word. "It's cool," I finally said. "You do your thing. No problem." I
realized I mostly meant it. Of course he didn't know, and I didn't want to
know, that I was actually kind of turned on by it.

"I'm glad. I was worried." He stopped for a moment. "You could always join
in if you're into it."

To Be Continued