Date: Fri, 4 Dec 2020 14:13:29 +0000
From: Alain Mahy <amahy1957@gmail.com>
Subject: Voices 12

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No ssex in this chapter, but it will come back soon.  Stay tuned...



	A few weeks later, we heard that Fernando's studio was closed
completely.  Some friends of ours had even seen a van and several men
loading the technical equipment one day.  We guessed we heard the last of
Fernando.  What I didn't expect was that I would cross paths with Frederic.
My God!  It was not the same Frederic I had last seen at our house-warming
party.  It was only because he stared so intensely at me that I was
wondering where I knew that face from, and recognized him.  He had lost a
lot of weight.  The Frederic we had known always took care of himself and
with the job he did, his appearance was always perfect.  Little did I know
that Frederic was on the edge of collapsing and even had suicidal thoughts.
I didn't know why, but I went over to him and said hello.  He didn't answer
with words because he immediately started to sob and even fell on the
ground.  I kneeled beside him.  Something told me there was a nasty history
behind it all and I was convinced that Fernando was a big part of it.

	I helped Frederic back on his feet.  He couldn't look me straight
in the eyes.  I pushed him against a wall to make sure that he, at least,
wouldn't fall backwards.  His clothes were filthy.  He was not shaven and
most importantly, I smelt alcohol on his breath.  If you had told me he was
living on the streets, I wouldn't have had the slightest problem believing
it.  We were very close to a café with a terrace.  I led him to it,
sat him down and ordered the biggest breakfast they would serve and lots of
coffee.  The waiter looked suspiciously at me.  It didn't bother me.  The
breakfast was for Frederic as I had already eaten.  As soon as it was on
the table, Frederic devoured it.  I wondered how long it was since he had
had a decent meal.  His plate was soon empty and he looked with pleading
eyes at me.  He still hadn't said a word.  By the way he looked at me, I
ordered a second breakfast and it was gone at the same speed as the first
one.

	Several coffees later, Frederic seemed to relax a bit.  I knew he
had a severe problem.  It was obvious.

	-Do you want to talk about what happened? I asked.

	Tears were in his eyes again.  He looked ashamed.

	-Why are you doing this for me after what I did?

	-I have the feeling that it is not all your fault, I answered.  The
only thing you did was believing in someone who wasn't worth it... I
suspect.

	He nodded.  This was not going to be an easy conversation.  I hated
it when I had to get something out of someone.  I urged him to tell me his
side of the story behind his total decline.  He sighed several times.

	-I need a drink!

	-I don't think it is a good idea Frederic.  I want you to sober up
and tell me what happened to you before I can help you, if you accept any
help.

	-I don't deserve any help... from no one.  I am just a scumbag and
a drunk.

	-Frederic... everybody deserves a second chance, but I have to know
your story.

	He was shaking all over.  I could see he NEEDED a drink.  My God!
What had he gotten in to?

	-I'll buy you a drink after you tell me what exactly happened, not
before.

	He had again that pleading look on his face.  I stayed impassible
and he seemed to remember I was a man of my word.  He sighed again.

	-What do you want to know?

	-Everything!

	-Oh ...  Do you want me to start at your house-warming party?

	-It would be a good start, I answered.

	-Hmm...  That night we had a threesome with Flint.  It was great.
When Flint fell asleep, Fernando took me by the hand and led me to the den
where Flint wouldn't hear us.  He said he was madly in love with me and
wanted us to spend the rest of our lives together.  At that time, I felt so
lonely and wanted to hear these words from whoever it would be.  It
happened to be Fernando who said them.  I believed him and fell in his
spiderweb.  I knew later that it was a spiderweb and that he was a lethal
spider.  We dressed in a hurry and left Flint's place.  We ran away from
him.  Fernando talked me into moving away, to another city and even another
country if necessary.  Jeez... I saw myself on a tropical island living
what I thought was the love of my life.  We never reached any island.  We
just got to the next city.  Love makes blind people say and blind I was.
Our first month together was beautiful.  I had quit my job and knew I could
afford to be without one for a bit of time.  Fernando didn't work either.
We went to parties you can't even imagine.  Booze and drugs were the stars
of the night.  At first I refused, but Fernando was so insistent that I
gave in.  That was the first door to hell that opened.  Each night we drank
more and more and combined it with lots of cocaine.  I was paying for it
most of the times.  When one day I said I wouldn't pay, Fernando started to
beat me.  I fought back, but he was a lot stronger and fighting back made
it all worse.  The second time I said I had no more money, the beating was
even stronger.  It was a lie... there was not that much left on my bank
account, but he demanded it.  I said no and ended that night in hospital,
with Fernando next to me.  He apologized profusely and in the emergency
room he pretended I fell from the stairs.  The doctors didn't believe his
story and not even ten minutes later, the police was there to interrogate
Fernando.  He firmly stuck to the stair-story and as I was so afraid of
another beating, I confirmed it.

	It costed Flint an eye and an arm to continue.

	-I was in hospital for three days.  Fernando didn't come to see me
once.  When I was released, I went home.  I couldn't believe what I saw.
The place we rented was completely destroyed.  You have to know that the
lease contract was on my name.  I couldn't face the situation and came back
here.  I went to my old apartment that was mine.  When I arrived I saw the
front door was open and entered to find a totally empty space.  All my
furniture and belongings had gone.  I went to my bedroom where I had a safe
with some money in it.  It had been broke open and was empty as well.  The
only thing I thought I could do was to withdraw some money from my bak
account, but it was only then that I saw that my bank card was not in my
wallet anymore.  I went to my bank.  My account was empty and he had even
used my available credit.  I owed the bank five thousand.

	I couldn't imagine what it was to have to live such a situation.
Frederic took a deep breath and continued.

	-A few days later I was arrested.  The owners of the apartment we
had rented were suing me for the repairs.  The bank was suing me for the
unpaid credit and I didn't have a penny to buy some food.  I had to face
trial and was, of course, condemned.  That was when I started to sell my
body, doing blow-jobs and let me fuck in the darkest alleys and most filthy
hotels.  I needed the money for food, booze and cocaine.  My apartment had
been seized by the court but as there was still a mortgage on it and after
paying the owners of the other apartment, the bank and so on, there was
absolutely nothing left for me.  As I had no place to live, I wandered on
the streets.  Came the moment that I couldn't even have a decent shower and
that made that my sex-clients deserted me as well...  So, thanks for the
breakfast.  Can I have a drink now?

	I didn't know what to do, but bought him a drink anyway.  After
that, I made a conference call with Filip and Flint, explaining them what
had happened.  The story Frederic had told me was so incredible that I
didn't think he could have invented it.  I believed him.  Filip and Flint
were so stunned that they couldn't utter a word.  Finally, Filip said to
bring Frederic home and let him have a decent shower or bath, as well as
some clean clothes and that we would talk about the whole problem at noon.
So I did.

	In the bathroom I told Frederic to strip and to step in the shower.
He obeyed without any resistance.  It was only then that I saw the numerous
scars and marks on his body.  I was horrified.  It only confirmed what he
had told me.  I suddenly felt so dirty when thinking about the fact that I
had let Fernando fuck me.  I came to realize that we had not known Fernando
at all.  I left Frederic to his shower, prepared a new razor to shave and a
toothbrush and also had some clean clothes for him to wear.  While he was
showering, I prepared the lunch.  I dressed the table for five people as
Fabio was always lunching with us.

	Filip and Flint showed a lot of empathy but not to the point of
hugging or kissing.  I warned Frederic that he would have to face Flint as
he was living with us.  Frederic became really nervous and was shaking all
over again.

	-Relax Frederic, Flint will not harm you and doesn't hold it
against you what happened.  Let's say he is not happy the way Fernando and
you acted, that's for sure, but he is one of the good guys, I can assure
you that.

	Despite his earlier question of why I did what I did, Frederic
became more confident and started to trust me... I think.  Filip and Flint
both had had time to think about what to do, even if there was no immediate
answer.  To Fabio I gave a quick short version of the facts so that he
would know what was going on.

	I wouldn't say Frederic was his old self when he came out of the
bathroom.  He was clean and shaven and with clean clothes on he was
... presentable.  He was not the handsome man we had known when we bought
the house, but at least he didn't look like a beggar or a vagabond.  Even
with two complete breakfasts in his stomach, he still devoured whatever was
on his plate.  It would make him gain some weight and that was not a bad
idea at all.

	Filip decided to postpone the appointments he had that afternoon
and to take Frederic to our family doctor.  The most urgent thing was to
have a complete STD test done as he had admitted selling his body and not
always in the most hygienic conditions, plus that he couldn't afford to buy
condoms.  Filip asked our doctor to get the medical report when Frederic
had been in the hospital.  And last, but not least, Filip wanted our doctor
to send Frederic to rehab for cocaine and booze.  Frederic was sober enough
to realize he was given the chance of a lifetime and accepted whatever the
doctor and Filip decided.

	That same afternoon, Filip drove Frederic to the rehab center after
the doctor's visit.  The program was hard and Frederic knew he had to
accept if he didn't want to end in the streets again.  We were not allowed
to visit him the first two months, but yes, we were allowed to pay the
expensive bills.  We hadn't hesitate a moment to accept that
responsibility.  As we paid the bills, we were entitled to receive a weekly
update of how Frederic was doing.  These reports were in the typical
medical terminology that we didn't understand very well.  Our doctor helped
us to translate that medical jargon into normal understandable language.
In short, Filip did well.

	The first two months went so fast and on the first Sunday we were
allowed to visit, we were first introduced to the head of the rehab center
who gave us some instructions about what was allowed and what not.  After
that we had to go to a kind of big room where patients and visitors could
meet.  When we saw Frederic we were stunned.  He had gained some weight and
he was almost his old self again.  He had a bright smile on his face and
genuinely seemed happy to see us.  He first hugged me and then Filip.  He
politely asked Flint if he could hug him as well.  Flint accepted and
Frederic had a few happy tears rolling down his cheek.

	We sat down at a table near the window that gave us magnificent
views on the well maintained garden.  We were served coffee or lemonade.  I
thought that first visit would be a bit awkward, but it wasn't.  Frederic
had recovered a kind of self-confidence.

	-I first and foremost want to apologize to you guys, for all the
harm I could have done to you.  Flint, my sincere apologies because you
were the first to suffer because of my actions.  And I want to thank you
for all you did and still are doing.  I can assure you I'll get my life
back together and will repay you every cent you paid for me.  I insist on
it and won't take no for an answer.  And last, I want to tell you that I
won't disappoint you in any way.  Here, they make you realize how you got
to the point of needing the center, how to accept it and how to do the
necessary to not fall again in the past errors.  I will do everything that
I can to make you proud of me and my future behavior.

	That little speech got us all emotional.  It was so obvious that
Frederic meant every word of it and I was convinced he would indeed get his
life back together like he promised.  I crossed my fingers that that center
would continue the good work they started.  After his little speech,
Frederic told us about how life was at the center and how difficult it had
been at the beginning.  He qualified the first three to four weeks as hell,
till he realized what he was there for and the damage he had caused.  All
the time he had been on his own after Fernando got all he could and that he
was on the streets, slowly going down hill, he wasn't himself anymore.  He
had recuperated part of his self-esteem and took proud in his achievements.
He told us how he remembered the day I had found him and how he had
appreciated the help he had received and still was receiving.  We were
happy to hear and see his evolution in only two months time.  He was even
worried what Fabio was thinking of him and certainly would appreciate
seeing him so he could apologize to him as well.  All in all, we were happy
for every cent we were spending on Frederic's recovery.

	Leaving Frederic behind was a bit hard although we knew it was best
for him.  The program Frederic was following was a six-months one.  During
that time we often went to visit him, making him feel that he had friends.
At first we were only allowed to visit on Sundays but with time, and
Frederic very good behavior, we were allowed almost any day.  As Frederic
had requested, Fabio started to come along as well though he didn't
understand why Frederic had asked it.  I had to persuade him, telling him
it would be a benefice to Frederic's complete recovery.  I didn't know if
Fabio accepted because I was his boss or if there was another motive.
Frederic appreciated Fabio visiting him.  That was when we realized that
Frederic was really his old self again : someone with respect towards
others and gratitude for what people did for him.

	We also noticed that Frederic was wearing new clothes.  Where he
had gotten them form was a mystery, but I guessed some of them would be on
the monthly bill we paid.  He wore them with pride and dignity and I
thought several times he could be on a catwalk of any fashion-show.  It
seemed he had also visited the hairdresser as he was wearing a quite modern
look.  Yes, he was truly handsome and even attractive.  With a smile and a
wink I asked him if he had found a new love.  Frederic laughed it off.

	-Do you really think I could go down that lane again?  Please Al,
after what I have been going through, love a man again is the that last
thing on my mind.  I can accept whatever friendship comes my way, but I
don't feel ready to trust anybody.  I guess that is an issue I will have to
work on.  The psychologist here tells me I have to do things at my own
rhythm and that there is no need, for the moment, to hurry things.  One
thing is sure: nobody will ever have the opportunity to beat me again.  We
are asked here to do physical exercises and I chose self-defense.

	I was truly proud of him and it just confirmed he was a good guy.
OK, he had done some stupid things.  I was sure he wouldn't commit such
mistakes again.  A few weeks later he told me that he had volunteered to
help with some groups and that he loved what he was doing.  I suggested
that he could maybe start studying again, maybe psychology or social work.
The mere suggestion brought a spark in his eyes.  It was as if it had never
crossed his mind before.

	-The first thing I will have to do when I get out of here, is to
find a job and be independent.  There is a department here that looks for
jobs for people who are almost at the end of their rehab.  I will also have
to find a place to live.

	It made me think and I would have to talk to Filip and Flint about
an idea I had in my head.  Frederic was showing that he wanted to recover
an honorable place in society and was doing all he was asked for.  He
deserved a little help more.  While I was preparing our dinner, Filip and
Flint sat at the kitchen island, sipping some chilled white wine and I
thought it was the best moment to suggest my idea.  I first told them how
well Frederic was doing at the center and that he started to think about
being independent again and finding a new job.

	-His problem is of course to find a place to live.  I was thinking
that maybe, if you two agree, we could clean out the attic.  It is spacious
enough to refurbish it into a cosy living space.  There is already a toilet
and that means that water pipes reach the attic as well as water drainage.
Installing a bathroom and a kitchen wouldn't be such a hard work.  Finding
the necessary furniture for living and dinning room would be easy and
finding a bed and a closet would be just a piece of cake.  As to give him
responsibility, we could charge him a little rent as to not making him feel
we do some charity work.

	-That is a brilliant idea Al, Filip said.  It would also allow him
to not be left on his own after what he has been through.  We could tell
him he has to pay rent only once he has a job.  We can contact the guy who
did some works here before we moved in.  He did a very good job and
finished all in the required time.  If you remember well, he was not that
expensive.

	-I know a friend's girlfriend that has a secondhand shop of
furniture.  I am sure we could get good prices with her.  At the company we
will soon have our yearly sales of out-dated computer things.  They change
them because the accountant says it has to be replaced, but the computers
and other devices are in perfect working order.

	We had about six weeks to transform the attic and it was the first
time where we would really know if the sound-proof room was really
efficient.  Fabio would be our best reporter on this as there was quite lot
of noise in the house with the workers installing bathroom and kitchen in
the attic.  Consequently, I had to forget about translations and
concentrated on recording the voice-over for several more documentaries.  I
also had two audio-books pending of recording.  In less than three weeks,
all the big works were done.  We only had to bring in the furniture we
bought and make the attic a cosy living space.

	The week before Frederic was released from the center, he was very
nervous and excited.  During six months the center had been his home and
even though he longed to be able to get out, he also was a bit apprehensive
of doing so.  We hadn't told him about the attic.  We wanted it to be a
surprise, but he surprised us even more as he had found a job.  In fact, he
was not leaving the center completely.  His volunteer work had been so much
appreciated that the staff had offered him a paid job.  When he told us, it
was like a kid telling us he received something for Christmas.  He had a
week off before starting his duties after leaving the center.  Everybody
thought it was to give him time to find a living space.  We went to get him
that last day and brought him home.  He mentioned he had to hurry to find
an apartment.  That was when we blindfolded him and led him up the stairs
and opened the door to his new private quarters.  I took off his blindfold.

	-If you want it, this is your new apartment.


To be continued...

All comments welcome at amahy1957@gmail.com