Love in a Tent Near Lappeenranta
(A True Story of Two Finnish Boys' Search for the Truth)

"Jussi, what is the answer? Jussi?"

"Huh?" Jussi asked, coming out of his daydream. "Sorry, pardon?"

"I asked you what the answer was."

Jussi looked about the classroom desperately for some clue what the question was as his cheeks turned a bright red.

"Tomas?" the teacher asked.

As Jussi's classmate responded, Jussi quickly flipped through the textbook to find out what page they were on. This was not the first time he had lost attention in class, and if it was to continue the teacher was sure to contact his father, and then there would be trouble for certain. Jussi tried to concentrate on the lesson, but it was not easy for the fourteen-year-old, and especially in a course like Language. He even had difficulty concentrating in the subjects he was good at, like Geometry and Mathematics. His mind kept coming back to a brown-haired, blue-green-eyed schoolmate that had stolen his heart, and his mind. No, it wasn't a girl, it was a good-looking boy by the name of Antti.

Antti had introduced him to boy-boy sex during an overnight class trip a year ago, and Jussi could not get that experience out of his mind. The problem was, the same did not seem to be true for Antti. That was breaking his heart. A year had gone by now and Antti didn't even seem to notice Jussi was around. They were in the same school and level, but in different classes so the opportunities to be together were not that great. He knew Antti was popular with the girls, and he suspected the outgoing teenager was probably having sex with one of them, if not several of them. Antti was very popular with the guys too. He was that kind of boy, easy to make friends with. Jussi was quite sure Antti wasn't into having sex with guys, but if he was, he wouldn't blame Antti if he didn't mess with him. Antti could have his pick of the hottest and the best, so why chose him? After all, his one and only experience had been with Antti. Besides, Antti was fifteen.

"Jussi?"

Oh paska, he had done it again! This was going to have to stop. After class he stood before the teacher and listened obediently to the lecture about paying attention, and assured the teacher that no, there was not a problem that was pressing on his mind. Like he was going to tell the school's counsellor that he couldn't pay attention in class because he had the hots for one of his male schoolmates!

Having concluded that Antti was not interested in him, Jussi had tried to put him out of his mind many times in the past. One problem with that was that Jussi and Antti were in the same sports group, and that meant they saw each other in the showers twice a week. When Jussi had discovered that last fall, he had been delighted. However the first time they showered, Antti seemed to avoid him, and when Jussi glanced over at him, he turned his back, as if he did not want Jussi to see his body, which did not make sense considering the intimacy they had shared in the hotel room. The first time Jussi could understand as a coincidence, but the same thing happened the next time, and the time after that.

"Perhaps he is ashamed of what we did, or perhaps it is just me," thought Jussi. "Perhaps he does not want to have anything more to do with me." Jussi continued to glance over at the good-looking boy, however, and think about their one time together, and on occasion he saw Antti glancing at him too. At times like that he thought maybe there was still an interest, but invariably Antti would glance away. A few times it was Jussi who had to turn away before something embarrassing happened. To pop an erection in the showers in front of forty guys would be something he would never live down. Yet, the next week, Jussi found himself stealing glances again at the boy he loved and worshipped, even if it was from afar. Besides the two of them, there were thirty-eight other nude boys in the showers, but he had eyes for only one.

So it went for the year. By the time summer vacation rolled around, Jussi had given up hoping there would be any further contact. So it was a surprise to receive a call from Antti inviting him to come for an overnight camp out with him. He mentioned nothing more, but Jussi's heart, and his dink, leaped at the possibility that they might discuss old memories, and hopefully create some new ones. After Antti's indifferent treatment all year, Jussi figured that most likely nothing would happen, but he could dream. Even if nothing sexual did happen, he was satisfied just to have the chance to be with Antti for a day and a night.

That morning he showered especially long, and then picked out his best clothes to make a favourable impression. On the bus trip to Antti's his heart was pounding rapidly with excitement at spending some time alone with his friend, and his dickhead was itching with the thought of spending a night with him. They went to Antti's home first for a bite to eat, and Antti's dad gave them some mosquito repellant and money in case they wanted to stop at a hot dog stand. Jussi did have a hot dog in mind, but not the kind that you can buy from a stand. As the boys headed out, Jussi had great difficulty controlling his excitement, and had to occasionally slip his hand in his pocket and squeeze his penis to stop it from becoming erect.

Anticipating a two-man pup tent, Jussi could not believe the twelve-foot-diameter army tent that he found at their destination in the hardwood forest two kilometres from Antti's home. It had a kerosene lamp and even a log furnace with warm water. Emptying their backpacks and spreading out their sleeping bags, the two friends sat down cross-legged across from each other to chat.

Both boys enjoyed talking, and they had a lot of catching up to do since the class trip over a year ago. The next several hours were joyfully spent talking about teachers, school, and classmates as boys do all over the world. It was a wonderful time and not once was there a mention of what they had done on the school trip, but Jussi did not mind. Just being there with Antti was wonderful. As the temperature in the tent heated up, the boys began to take off their heavier clothing until they were sitting there chatting in only their T-shirts and pants even though it was early June.

It grew dark and eventually the two boys found nothing more to talk about. As they sat there in silence, listening to the hiss of the kerosene lamp and the night sounds of the forest, Jussi looked over at Antti. The shadows played over his face, highlighting his cheeks and making his blue-green eyes sparkle, like the ocean he figured. How he loved that face and that sensuous smile that seemed to always be on his lips. He felt a mad urge to reach over and stroke Antti's long, clean, disorderly hair.

"You remember the time we had on the class trip, when we were alone in the hotel room?" Antti finally asked softly.

Jussi looked down at the floor of the tent, and after a pause, replied in a whisper with a catch in his throat, "Sure I remember. I figured maybe you had forgotten it. I figured . . . maybe . . . well, that you were ashamed of what we did."

In the silence that followed Jussi thought he was going to die. Had he said wrong? He dare not look up at Antti in fear of what he might see in his eyes.

"I could never forget the best time I ever had," Antti finally replied. Jussi dared to glance up, afraid this might be some cruel joke. Antti's eyes stared back at him honestly, but there was a seriousness in them too, almost a coldness.

"You have never said anything."

"It is something I have had to think long on, Jussi. It is not easy for me to say . . . to admit to myself . . . that I am bi," Antti confessed. The boys stared at the floor of the tent again. It had become a fascinating focus of interest in their embarrassment. They could hear their hearts beating in the silence. "This past winter has been particularly hard for me as I have tried to sort out what is happening . . . to figure out what direction my life is going."

"I did not know," Jussi replied, his heart yearning with sadness for his friend. "This is not something I have really thought about, if I am bi or gay or straight. I never thought about what we did like that, like in those terms that is. I just never thought of it meaning those things." Jussi thought for a moment before continuing, "whether I am bi or something is not a problem for me. I just know that I liked what we did. I liked it a lot, and so I just figured so what?"

Jussi was truly amazed at the idea of their encounter a year ago meaning more than that, and he considered it now as the two boys sat there staring at the shadows on the tent floor. "So," Jussi began at last, daring to raise his head and look at his friend, "what do you think now?"

"Sure I am at peace now with myself," Antti replied, raising his head also and looking Jussi in the eyes. The serious, hard look that had been there earlier was gone. Back was the happy, horny look of a young teenage boy that Jussi remembered a year ago. The two friends stared into each other's eyes for what seemed an eternity. Jussi's heart skipped several beats with the hope that there might still be something between the two of them, but felt heavy with the fear that there might never again be that special feeling.

"So, what do you think now?" Antti finally asked. "You disgusted with me for what I did in the hotel room?"

"Never! I waited all winter for you to say something, for you to notice me. When you did not, I figured that I had disgusted you. I figured maybe you did not have a good time, or maybe you thought that having sex with a boy was wrong. There are many who would be disgusted to know what we did," Jussi said, his voice trembling and his deep blue eyes close to tears as the words that he had been holding back came tumbling out.

"You were wrong. We were both wrong," said Antti softly.

The two friends broke into shy smiles at the same time. The tightness that had been gripping their hearts began to fade away.

"You really did like what we did?" Antti asked.

"It was the best thing that ever happened to me," Jussi replied eagerly. "To feel another boy's body against mine, to feel his hot breath on my face, to touch his hard cock, these are things I dreamed about but never thought I would ever know until that night."

"It was my best time also," admitted Antti.

The two talked of that experience, of their curiosity and worries up until that evening alone in the hotel room, of their secret desires and fears, and of the joy when it happened. They talked of how they had felt afterwards, of how they had wished it would happen again, but also of their guilt and even shame. They wanted it again, but each was afraid what the other might think, and what the other might say. They were afraid of the other's rejection. They talked of the glances in the showers, of how the sight of the other's naked body was arousing, but how each had turned, and how each had assumed it was because the other did not like him looking, not because it was to prevent popping an erection.

"Hey, Jussi, I do believe you have become horny. Look at your pants!" Antti suddenly said with a wide grin. "Se nousta tanaan!" Antti had a wonderful grin that made you grin too when you saw it.

"That it has made a tent is not a surprise for me."

"They why are you as red as a brake light?" teased Antti.

"I think you are not so cold either," Jussi replied. "You only hide it better."

"You have that right, man," said Antti. Standing up, he pushed down his pants and stepped out of them. His young hardon stood up tall and proud, eager to be seen, eager to be touched. To Jussi, seeing the naked teenager standing there in the dim light of the kerosene lamp, the shadows hiding his young testicles and highlighting the contours of his knob and giving his naked body a sensuous, forbidden look, it was like looking at a young Finnish god. "So, you can see I am horny too, and I'm hoping you will also let me see your cock."

Jussi stood up on trembling legs, his loins feeling so weak he was not sure he would be able to stand, and he slowly pushed down his pants. The two boys stood there looking at each other's nakedness, each feeling the tension building as the kerosene hissed and a gentle night breeze blew outside the tent. The air was filled with the freshness of a summer's night, with the scent of pine and alders and the dankness of the damp moss on the floor of the hardwood forest.

"You know . . . I would . . . well, like to feel your hand around my cock."

Jussi reached out slowly, eager in his heart but not wanting to seem too eager, and wrapped his fingers about the teenage boy's knob where the foreskin of his uncut cock clung tightly. He slowly drew the skin back, exposing the boy's tender, sensitive head. Jussi looked down at it eagerly, lovingly. It was the most beautiful thing in the world. Jussi reached over and cupped Antti's tender, full nuts with his other hand. As he gently rolled them between his fingers, he felt Antti's cock jerk excitedly in his hand.

Antti too reached over and took his friend's hard jaykistya in his hand. He held it tightly. It was strange to hold another's cock even though he held his own daily. It was so different, so . . . exciting, . . . and so right. It had taken Antti a winter of contemplating and soul searching to admit that, to admit that at least for now, he enjoyed holding another boy's prick, and doing things with it. To hold each others' most private and delicate organ had to truly be the sign of true friendship, and to have sex, had to be absolute friendship. Antti began to ease his fingers up and down his friend's stiff, hot organ.

"Hey, lay down on your back," Jussi said with a huskiness in his voice. "I will do something for you. Something I have thought about all winter."

Antti lay down on his back, eager to do anything with his friend. Jussi crawled over to him, and taking his hardon in his hand, he began to work his fist up and down the shaft slowly. At the same time he bent his head and gave the gorgeous knob a lick. It was the most delicious thing he had ever tasted, and he eagerly continued to lick the sponge head as he slowly jerked on the shaft. Antti groaned approvingly. Releasing his hold, Jussi continued licking down the shaft, savouring the boy flavour, and even more, savouring the delight of knowing he was bringing pleasure to his friend. He could lick his stick forever, but he was soon distracted by Antti's balls. He ran his tongue over them, licking the saltiness from his folds of skin and inhaling the pungent aroma of hot boy-sexuality emanating from his groin. The aroma was even stronger than the oil from the kerosene lamp.

Antti was squirming now, and breathing heavily, like a cat in heat. He reached down and ran his fingers through Jussi's short, light brown hair. Jussi was certain he even could hear him purring as he slipped his mouth over the cockhead and began to suck and lick the fifteen-year-old's beautiful knob. He caressed the tender nuts that held the cream he wanted to taste, and he stroked the soft buttocks as the boy beneath him raised his ass and gasped and squirmed in an ecstasy that only boys can know. Soon Antti was jerking his hips up and down and squirming left and right uncontrollably with his pending climax.

Jussi sucked harder and licked the hot knob as if gone mad as he squeezed Antti's smooth buttocks tightly. With a lunge, Antti groaned and exploded in Jussi's mouth. Jussi swallowed the offering of boy cum eagerly, hungrily, loving the taste, loving being able to share Antti's climax, and most of all, loving that he had been the cause. It took several minutes before he reluctantly allowed his mouth to slip off the boy's cock.

Taking Jussi in his arms, Antti drew his naked body close to his and the two boys kissed hotly, horny breaths blowing into each other's lungs. Antti reached down and grasped the stiff organ that had pressed against his stomach in their embrace, and then eased Jussi down onto the sleeping bag on his back. He looked down at the boy only six months younger than he. His athletic build, his cute face and short light brown hair, his bewitching deep blue eyes that flashed when he became angry, how many times had he formed that picture in his mind when he had jacked off at night. And now he was there on his back before him, waiting for him with eager anticipation, with a knowledge of the pleasures that Antti could bring.

He kissed and caressed his young suck-buddy, working his way from his lips down his neck, over his smooth, hairless chest and over his flat young stomach. He took the hot boy organ in his hand and licked it tenderly, carefully, knowing that after what had happened, Jussi would be quick to cum. He caressed his nuts and kissed them. He ran his tongue along the inside of his thighs, and then up his hot, aching stick and over the knob already leaking precum. He licked up the sweet, clear boy nectar, and then slipping his lips over the knob, he began to gently suck on the sensitive, aching bulb of cockmeat. Soon he too was receiving the unique gift of hot, fresh boy cum, and he swallowed it as eagerly as had Jussi.

They made love again later that night, slower, more tenderly, more knowingly. Afterwards, the two teenage boys lay locked arm in arm, the hot scent of young boys in rut, and the musky aroma of freshly spent boy cumm, filling the warm tent and escaping out into the night air to mingle with the scents of the forest, with the other scents of nature. A feeling of contentment and fulfilment, and of that special bond that only boy lovers can know, filled their minds and bodies. The two boys, at peace with themselves and with the world, dozed off, smiles on their cock-scented lips, and fingers loosely holding each other's sticky boyhood as they dreamt of love and lust and the good fortune that had brought them together.


Author's Note: This true story as related to the author by Jussi and Antti occurred in the early summer of 1997 and follows the first experience the two boys had a year earlier (In a Hotel Room in Turku). Comments can be sent to the author J.O. Dickingson at authorsix@hotmail.com. All comments will be forwarded to Jussi and Antti (with addresses and identification removed if requested).