Runaway Chapter 18

"Tyler?" Brian said softly, gently touching Tyler's damp face. "Are you okay now baby?" he asked.

Tyler nodded and released a trembling breath. "I think so," he whispered. "For a minute, it was like I was back there. It was all going to happen again." A shudder shook his body. "But then I heard a voice, I heard your voice. I listened to the sound of your voice, until I could hear the words. Then I knew that everything was okay."

They both leaned against the leather car seat, facing each other and holding hands between their bodies. They were oblivious to anything or anyone else. Brian gently stroked Tyler's cheek as they silently gazed into each other's eyes.

A little while later, Tyler glanced around the inside of the car, suddenly remembering where he was. He sat up straight. "Sorry for ruining the evening," he said softly.

The others looked at him in surprise. Jackie was across from him and leaned forward to touch his knee. "Tyler, don't be ridiculous. You didn't ruin anything," she said sincerely. "You've had some terrible things happen to you in the past. But just remember, you're family now. And in our family, when things get tough, we pull closer together, not farther apart."

Tyler noticed the rest of the Littrells and both Richardsons nodding in agreement. Tyler smiled tentatively at Jackie. "I promise I'll try to remember that Jackie," he said quietly.

Jackie patted his knee and sat back. "Good. But don't worry. I'm sure we'll all remind you about it…constantly!" she added with a grin.

Tyler laughed and so did everyone else. The tension faded and Tyler sat back in Brian's embrace.

The car pulled up to the Littrell residence and everyone climbed out. Harold Sr. suggested gathering in the den for coffee.

"Dad, if you don't mind, I think Ty and I will pass for tonight," Brian spoke up. "It's been a long day." He turned to Tyler. "If that's okay with you Ty?" he asked.

Tyler smiled lovingly at Brian. "I think it's a good idea. I'm more tired than I thought." Tyler looked at the other people around him. "I do want to thank all of you for the birthday dinner." He inhaled deeply before continuing. "I can honestly say it was the best birthday I've ever had," he said sincerely.

One by one, the members of Tyler's new family stepped forward to hug him before they walked into the den. Kevin was the last one to move forward. He engulfed Tyler in his arms.

"Family protects family Ty," he whispered. "If my Cus does anything to hurt you, let me know and I'll set him straight, okay?" Kevin stepped back and looked intently at Tyler.

Tyler smiled and nodded. Kevin turned to leave and Tyler spoke up. "Although Kev, don't you think it's a little late for the straight part?" he asked innocently, but with a grin on his face.

Kevin laughed aloud and looked back at Tyler. "Maybe," he said with a shrug. "But I'd give it a shot anyway!"

"Thanks Kevin," Tyler said as Kevin left. He then turned back to Brian and found Brian smiling. "What?"

Brian shook his head and held out his hand. "I'm glad you and Kev are getting along," he said simply as he led Tyler up the stairs.

They walked quietly up to the bedroom. Neither spoke as they undressed. Tyler walked towards the bathroom then paused, turning to look at Brian. "Bri, would you…" his voice trailed off. Brian looked at him and waited patiently. Tyler inhaled deeply before continuing. "Would you like to shower with me?" he breathed the words out in a rush. Brian looked at him in shock, making Tyler blush. "Just to shower, I mean, and only if you really want to…"

Brian walked over to Tyler and gently lifted the lowered chin. "I would very much like to join you Ty, but are you sure?" he asked softly.

Tyler smiled shyly and nodded. "Yeah, I'm sure," he replied.

Brian smiled brightly and turned Tyler towards the bathroom, following him into the room. Brian went about turning on the water while Tyler finished undressing. He slipped into the shower stall while Brian undressed.

Brian could see Tyler tense when he stepped into the spray of water behind the teenager. "Ty?" he said softly.

Slowly Tyler turned around, but his eyes remained looking at the floor. Brian sighed. "Do you want me to go?" he whispered. Tyler bit his lip and shook his head. "I don't mind if you want to look at me, baby," he added. Tyler moved his eyes to Brian's legs, taking in the light brown hairs visible on his shins. Slowly he moved his gaze up, until he encountered Brian's obvious arousal then his eyes flew to Brian's face in trepidation.

Brian smiled tenderly at Tyler's expression. "Does it really surprise you that I'm aroused by being here naked with you Ty? You're so beautiful! I promise I won't do anything unless you ask. You know I wouldn't hurt you baby," he said honestly.

Tyler smiled at that. "I know." His eyes lowered again. "Its just…I've… I've never seen… I've never touched another…."

Brian stepped closer to Tyler, silencing his stutters. "Tyler may I hug you?" he asked softly. Tyler nodded and Brian wrapped his arms around Tyler's trembling shoulders. He held the younger man tightly, ignoring Tyler's gasp of surprise when their naked erections touched. "Tyler, there is no rush and nothing to be afraid of. You decide what will happen, just let me know. Okay?" he whispered. He felt Tyler nod against his shoulder. After a few seconds, Tyler put his arms around Brian and hugged him back. When Tyler finally began to relax, Brian released his hold and stepped back, looking into Tyler's face. "So how about we get washed up then get some sleep? It's been a long day huh?"

Tyler nodded, and smiled shyly at Brian before grabbing a washcloth. He surprised Brian though, when he turned with the soaped cloth and began to wash Brian, starting at his neck and shoulders. Brian stood passively, allowing Tyler to touch and look at his body. Tyler proceeded slowly down Brian's chest before moving behind him and starting down his back. He quickly washed over Brian's firm buttocks and down his legs, before returning to the front. Tyler worked slowly up over Brian's shins and thighs. He paused when he reached the groin area and simply gazed at Brian's erection. Without meeting Brian's gaze, Tyler gently washed through the crease where thigh meets groin, and around below the testicles. He tentatively reached out and grasped the wavering erection and carefully washed it, ignoring Brian's sudden inhalation of air. When he was done, Tyler released the aroused flesh and stood up, finally meeting Brian's eyes.

"Was that okay?" he asked hesitantly.

Brian smiled broadly. "That was wonderful Ty." He reached out to take the cloth from Tyler. "May I do the same for you?" he asked. Tyler's eyes widened in surprise and a brief instance of panic, before he nodded slightly. "If I do anything that makes you uncomfortable, tell me okay?" Brian said intently. Tyler nodded again.

Brian carefully followed the same path Tyler had used, starting at Tyler's shoulders and working his way down and around before finally reaching Tyler's groin. He knelt before the young man and looked up at him. Their eyes met at Brian slowly reached out and grasped the semi erect organ. Tyler inhaled sharply and tensed. Brian froze and waited, carefully watching Tyler's face. After a few seconds Tyler nodded slightly and relaxed a little. Brian quickly finished washing Tyler then turned him into the spray of water to rinse off.

Brian stood and gently wrapped his arms around Tyler's waist, once again meeting his hazel eyes. "Did you like that?" he asked quietly.

Tyler smiled shyly and nodded. He leaned forward and gave Brian a quick kiss. "Thank you. I… I thought I might not like it…you know, feeling your hands on me…reminding me…but I knew it was you, and I didn't feel scared, I felt safe." He kissed Brian again and hugged him tightly. "You make me feel safe and loved," he whispered. Brian felt his heart soar at the words; grateful Tyler was beginning to accept his love and help.

Brian broke the embrace, smiled brightly and pulled Tyler out of the shower. "You are loved Ty, and I'll always try to make you safe. Now come on baby, lets get some sleep." They dried themselves off and walked back into the bedroom.

Both men pulled on fresh boxers before climbing into the large, comfortable bed. Tyler quickly rolled over to snuggle against Brian's side. "Thank you for the wonderful birthday," he murmured and kissed Brian's cheek.

Brian smiled and wrapped his arm around Tyler, hugging him close. "You're welcome Tyler," he whispered as they both quickly drifted to sleep.

Brian woke up late the next morning and when he rolled over, found that the bed beside him was empty. He sat up and listened but couldn't hear Tyler in the bathroom. Deciding that Tyler must have gone downstairs already, he climbed off the bed and went to take care of morning business. Freshly dressed he trotted down the stairs and into the kitchen. He stopped suddenly when he noticed his Mom and Tyler over by the counter. He watched them mix up the ingredients for chocolate chip muffins and put the mix in the little paper cups, before putting them into the oven.

He grinned, pleased that Tyler was getting along so well with his Mom. "So do I get to taste the first one?" he asked as he continued into the kitchen. The two cooks turned around and smiled.

"Good morning Brian," Jackie said, walking over to pour a cup of coffee from the coffeemaker.

Tyler walked over to Brian and gave him a hug. "Morning Bri," he said softly, adding a kiss to Brian's cheek.

Brian returned the hug then pulled back to gently kiss Tyler's lips. "Morning baby. How did you sleep?" he asked, wondering if their shower activities the night before had given Tyler bad dreams.

Tyler gave Brian a brilliant smile. "I slept great, sweetie," he replied with a shy grin. Brian smiled at the term of endearment.

"Sweetie huh?" he asked softly.

Tyler nodded. "To me you are the sweetest person I've ever met," he replied seriously.

Brian kissed his cheek before he walked over to the counter and sat down on one of the stools. He gratefully accepted the coffee from his mom. "Thanks mom." Brian took a sip of the hot liquid. "So you two have been busy I see," Brian commented, looking around the kitchen.

Jackie smiled. "I was making muffins and Tyler came down. He wanted to learn so I showed him what to do. I think he'll make a great cook," she added.

Tyler blushed. "Thanks Jackie," he said shyly.

"Its true," she said then glanced at her watch. "I'm meeting your Dad for lunch in town Brian. Tyler, if you will watch the muffins and take them out in fifteen minutes, I'm going to go upstairs and change."

Tyler nodded. "I'll watch them Jackie, promise."

She smiled and left the kitchen.

They sat quietly for a minute before Tyler reached over and covered Brian's hand with his own. "I…I just wanted to thank you," he said softly, causing Brian to look at him.

"For what baby?" Brian asked gently.

Tyler raised his eyes and looked at Brian. "For last night, for not pushing me." He glanced back to their hands. "It was…it was nice to be able to look at you…and touch you…without being afraid. I'm so tired of being afraid, Brian," he murmured.

Brian slid off the stool and stepped closer to Tyler, putting his arms around him. "I know Ty. I wish I could just snap my fingers and make it all better. But I can't. It's going to take time. But," he lifted Tyler's chin so their eyes could meet. "It will get better. I promise."

Tyler smiled slightly and nodded. They remained in an embrace until the timer went on the stove. Tyler pulled out of Brian's arms and walked over to the stove. Using the hot pads he pulled the muffins out of the oven and set them on the counter.

Brian pulled out a couple of plates, knives and butter. The two sat side by side and ate three muffins apiece. When they were finished, Brian turned back to Tyler. "Ty, do you still want us to talk to Dr Armstrong about finding a therapist?" he asked quietly.

Tyler stared blankly into space and chewed his bottom lip for a minute before nodding. He finally looked at Brian. "I think that would be a good idea. Will you come with me?"

Brian smiled. "Of course! Why don't we go shower and change? I'll give Kelly Armstrong a call. She's a GP, so maybe we could go see her and have her give you a check-up?" Brian suggested.

Tyler nodded. "Okay."

They returned to the bedroom and took turns showering. Brian called and was able to set up an appointment with Dr Armstrong for early afternoon.

By the time they were both dressed, Brian decided they would head into Lexington for the doctor's office.

Less than an hour later they were both sitting in the waiting room, while Tyler filled out a form. Brian sat beside him, but didn't speak, letting Tyler do the entire form himself. Tyler handed the completed form back to the receptionist then returned to his seat.

A few minutes later, the nurse came out. "Tyler Johnson?" she asked.

Both Tyler and Brian stood and walked over to her. She didn't question Brian's presence and led the two men back to a cubicle. Tyler sat up on the exam table while Brian used one of the chairs.

"You okay?" Brian asked.

Tyler nodded. "Yeah, just thinking about last time," he murmured.

Brian walked over and stood between Tyler's legs. He put his arms on Tyler's shoulders. "Try not to baby. Things are so much better than back then. Think about us, instead," he added, grinning when Tyler smiled.

The door opened suddenly and both men turned to look, relieved to see Kelly Armstrong entering with a folder. She looked up and smiled at them. "Hi there guys! Its good to see you both." She shut the door and walked over to them. Brian moved back to the chair, letting the doctor approach Tyler. "Its especially good to see you Tyler up and around. How are you feeling?" she asked, sitting down on the stool and looking directly at him.

Tyler glanced at Brian then down to his hands. "I…I'm okay. Most of the time," he added softly.

"What do you mean, most times?" she asked gently.

Tyler shrugged. "Um, I guess you could say I've had a couple of meltdowns," he said, finally looking at the doctor.

Kelly smiled encouragingly. "Can you tell me about them?"

Tyler licked his lips and looked down again. "Last night, Brian and his family planned a birthday dinner for me. After, we had to sneak out the back because of fans." He paused to inhale deeply. "The alley we were in brought back…some ugly memories," he said softly, unable to go into more details.

"Of your rape?" the doctor asked quietly. Tyler nodded. "Was there another time you had flashbacks?"

Again Tyler nodded. "Um, a couple of days ago." Tyler looked at Brian, unsure how much information to give. Brian nodded slightly. "Um, Brian and I were…we were kissing on the bed and …I'm not sure what happened. I…I just panicked. I couldn't move, I couldn't tell Brian to stop…I couldn't do anything," he added, his voice quavering.

Kelly reached out and touched Tyler's knee. "It's okay Tyler. It's over. And everything you're feeling is normal considering what happened to you." She looked down at the form Tyler had filled out, giving him a chance to compose himself. "I see you would like to get a referral to a therapist. I really think that's a great idea Tyler. I have someone in mind that I think would be good for you. You also want to have a physical? We can do that right now." She stood up before continuing. "Why don't Brian and I step out of the room and let you get undressed? Then I'll give you a quick check up and give you the therapist's contact information."

Brian waited for Tyler's response, completely willing to remain if Tyler asked him. He was a little surprised, but happy when Tyler didn't.

"Okay," Tyler agreed. He looked at Brian. "You'll stay in the waiting room?" he asked nervously.

Brian smiled and walked over to hug Tyler. "I promise."

Brian and Kelly walked out into the hall to give Tyler some privacy.

"You're doing a good job with him Brian," Kelly said suddenly. Brian looked at her in confusion. "You give him support, but YOU don't cling. Making him feel secure and letting him make his own choices is a big step. It's wonderful that he trusts you so completely. Often, victims of rape and abuse have problems trusting people."

Brian nodded. "I'm glad he trusts me. I guess its because I was the one who found him, and I've been there for him ever since."

"And you love him," Kelly added. "And I do believe there is power in love."