Date: Sun, 02 Mar 2003 13:12:43 +0000 From: tim tim Subject: Chapter 35 of Coach's Assistant Hi guys, Here is another chapter of Coach's Assistant. Hope you like where I am going with the story. Sometimes I think I might end it sometimes I just feel the flow of new idea's to continue it. Your reaction to it keep it possible for me to get on with it so if you want to share your experiences while reading let me know. Don't forget to fill in the questionnaire on the website as I need your help with for example finding a good nickname for Nick and Francis. You can also be informed for new chapters bye sending in your e-mail address on the page that is mentioned for it (trying to get it to work at the moment). Then I started on my website also a new story named TOM. (www.geocities.com/timsfunplace) If you are not into these kind of stories then don't read on. I have no knowledge of any sexual preferences of celebrities mentioned in this story, all is based on pure fiction. Let me know what you think of the story, noway16@hotmail.com or bye ICQ: 36967366 Chapter 35, Coach's Assistant "Oh, no, you didn't!" were the first words out of my mouth as I woke up. The next thing I knew, a wet towel was thrown in my face. "Hmm ... that's no way to be woken up. I'm going back to sleep again," I said out loud. " Oh, no, you're not! We have 20 minutes before we have to go, so you'd better get out of bed and into the shower, Nick, or I'm going to bring the shower to you!" "I thought you knew several ways to get me up, Francis, but this is definitely not the way to persuade me to move." "I know, Nick. If I start anything else, you'll never get up ... shit, wrong words. Some parts of you will get up, while others will persist in staying in bed." "Oh, shut up!" "Hmm, you really seem to be a bit cranky this morning, aren't you?" "Maybe that's because I'm not used to being used as a pillow to sleep on," I whispered softly. "What was that?" Francis asked ... although I knew he'd heard me. "I think I'd better go down and leave you to your own devices. This may just be the best way to get you up. If you want a kiss, you'd better get downstairs before we have to leave." With that, he exited my bedroom, leaving me alone again. I didn't want to get up. I wasn't sure I could, but I knew I had too. I was still a bit upset with what had happened the evening before. It would be good to see the doc again on Tuesday, so I could discuss this with him. I ended up downstairs just 2 minutes before we had to leave. My lunch was already in a bag and we walked outside together. The rest of the day went by in a blink. Lessons seemed to be rather boring and I knew the exams were coming up only two weeks after the meet ... I just didn't feel like paying attention. My mind kept wandering towards how I felt last night, the way I love Francis, and the exercises I had to perform in two weeks. It was incredible: I'd never had such a busy end of school year and I was really looking forward to the vacation. Practice went totally wrong. I just didn't feel like I was there. I listened to everything my dad told me, but at one point, he just gave up, I guess. I saw both Alexei and Francis looking at me from a distance with faces that said, what is up with you? I tried to do some stuff, easier exercises, on my own but even that didn't go right. It went better ... OK, that is true ... but I just never seemed to time it all right. Even when Alexei showed up to help me out, there was no improvement. I heard his comments and his advice, but it just didn't work. "I think you'd better stop, Nick. There is no point in continuing, if your mind isn't into what you're doing." "Sorry, Alexei," I said. "No reason to be sorry, Nick. Just figure out what is occupying your mind and get it out of the way ... otherwise, I'm not sure you'll be competing next weekend." I didn't answer him but just left the hall. Back in the locker room, I sat down on the bench and looked around, not sure what was wrong. Well, I knew what was wrong, but that'd been there before ... but ... well, maybe I hadn't faced it before. The things that happened last night ... the feelings that had been triggered ... made those past memories all come back. I really hoped that the doc could help me with this, put it all in perspective. I hadn't talked with Francis yet about going to a session with the doc together, and I knew this wasn't the best time to ask. I had to resolve other stuff first. I just sat back with my head against the locker and closed my eyes. "What is wrong with you, Nick?" My father ... damned! I'd hoped he'd be too busy with the rest to come in to ask me this question so soon. " Nick, I'm talking to you. What happened out there? You know we can't have this happen in two weeks. You can understand that?" Shit, I thought. What little trust he has in me! Just once I perform badly in training and he's on my case already. This intensity was the reason I'd never started getting into his sport, because I just knew he'd never trust me enough to stand beside me as he'd always done with David. "Sorry, dad. I just couldn't concentrate. I think I have too much on my mind." "Well, whatever it is, son, you need to work it out quickly, if you want to learn anything from Alexei this week." This time, there was more passion and more concern in his voice ... if he was really being honest. When I looked up, I saw concern in his eyes. Maybe what I said suggested to him that there was really something wrong, something I was trying to deal with. "I see the doc tomorrow, dad, and I think he can help me with it." "Good. If not and you want to talk about it, just let me know ... promise?" "OK, I will." I was still surprised by the way he reacted. He'd started with a harsh question, but he really listened and what I said really opened his eyes. It seemed as if he was genuinely concerned at the end. "If you want to, you can go home, or just stay and wait until the rest are finished. I think we'll go on for another half hour or so." "I'll wait and see if I can join in for the concentration exercises Alexei is going to do afterwards." "OK. See you later then." I managed to do the concentration portion without too much trouble, although I could feel that I wasn't able to bring myself to the same depth as I'd done before the last meeting. But I tried not to worry about that, as there was enough time to work on that. We left for home and I went upstairs while Alexei and dad prepared dinner for us. David and Francis went to their own rooms. We all wanted a bit of a rest and I told Francis I had to do some more homework as well. I opened up the computer to see if there was any e-mail from Randy. I also wanted to send one to James. Even though there wasn't one from Randy, I wrote him one: Hi, Randy, No news from you yet, so I hope you're still planning to come to meet us this weekend. I'm not sure about a party or anything but I'm looking into doing something fun, so that is good. If you're coming alone, I think we can arrange somewhere for you to sleep here in the house, either in the guestroom with Alexei or on the couch in the living room. If your boyfriend is coming along, let me know so we can book a room in a hotel that's just one block from here. If we need to pick you up from the airport on Friday, then let me know as we'll probably practice till 6 or 7 p.m. If you're arriving early, I can find someone to pick you up. So there's no need to use public transit or get a cab. Hope to hear from you soon. Nick I sent it and wondered when I'd get an answer. Then I started one to James: Hi, James, It was really good to have you here with us this weekend and it is a shame you can't be here next one ... but we'll keep Alexei busy and out of the hands of other guys. So you should have no worries about that. I just want to remind you that, if you want to chat or anything, you can get in touch. I've been going through some rough times, too, just after we met the first time. I'm sure you can remember that meeting as well as I can. I never told you anything about how I felt about that and about what I did with Mike. I'm not exactly sure, but I think that your feelings are about the same as mine, and I've had a hard time coping with them as well. They are not negative feelings ... don't get me wrong, James. I'd be lying if I said that I didn't like the task we did together for Mike ... but ... well, I feel the need sometimes to do something like that still. With Francis around, I can't give into those feelings, as that would feel to me like I think you feel, that you'd be betraying him. Like cheating on him or something like that. But remember ... in the final analysis, we'll need to talk about those feelings. I'll have to do that with Francis ... something that is becoming clearer and clearer to me ... and I think you need to do the same with Alexei. I'm sure that he won't be too upset. Surprised? Yes, probably ... but not upset, as he's heard it before from me. I hope you don't mind me being open and frank about this ... but I got the impression that feelings like this were troubling you. I just want to make sure that you know that you're not alone in having them. So, looking forward to seeing you again after the meet. I'll make sure that Andy or Brian will contact you about how late they'll want to pick you up. Remember, you're always welcome to call me if you need to talk about this. A big hugssssssssssssssssssssssss from me ... and I think if Alexei knew I was writing you, there would one from him as well. Byeee Nick Wow! Writing that down had done more for me than a whole day thinking about it! I was sure that James was feeling the same as I was, and trying to deal with it all on his own, too. But I started to realize that talking with Francis about this all would be the best thing in the end. Maybe I should discuss it with the doc first and then see how I could move forward on it. I sat there for a moment before I turned the computer off and walked downstairs to see how far along they were in cooking dinner. We spent the evening together. Not once were my training results of that day brought up, but I could feel how everybody was skirting the subject, not wanting to address it but they all wanted to make sure I was OK in their own way. The next day, just after lunch and before practice, I went to see the doc. I was right about what I was thinking, as he gave me the advice I'd already decided was the right course of action. I then brought up the subject of getting together with Francis for a meeting, that I thought I was up to that now. We agreed that it might be better to wait until after the meet, so we could have a few joint sessions with the doc before the vacation period started. He also made it clear that it was going to take some time to get through it all but that I was doing great so far, so he was convinced it would all work out for the best. I could only try to convince myself of that and I think it worked. At least after that session, I could once again concentrate on the routines that I was scheduled to perform at the meet. I saw a smile coming back on my father's face, as he saw that I could manage at least to do them all again without making mistakes. But, at the same time, I knew that I had a long way to go to perfect them. I had lost two days that I probably wouldn't be able to get back. That evening, I was glad that they were all a bit more relaxed around me. I think we were too busy for Francis to notice that there was a lot wrong. He knew I'd been to the doc, so I think he thought that something insignificant had disturbed my concentration. He didn't say anything to me about it. On Wednesday, we had an extra long training schedule, just to make sure we'd make the most of Alexei's visit. We were allowed to skip our afternoon classes and we trained for the rest of the day. First, some technical bits, then more concentration and relaxation techniques, then another technical session. So, by dinner, I can safely say we were all pretty tired and I was not sure I could stand to see a gym for a few days. The knowledge that it would all be over in a few days kept me going. As we left the gym on Wednesday, we bumped into Peter and Andrew. Well "bumped' might not be quite right; I think they were there waiting for us to come out. " Hey, you guys! Care to join us for a snack and a movie?" "If you think you or the movie can keep us awake, that might be a good idea," I replied to Andrew's question. "Don't you think we should tell your dad, Nick?" Francis interrupted. I think he wanted to avoid a discussion with my dad about this afterwards. "Of course. I'll just go back in and tell him." "OK, go ahead, I'm hungry." He pushed me back into the gym. I had no problem convincing my dad that it was time we did something else for a change, so I was back to join the guys quickly. I only had to promise that we'd be back home before 10 p.m. I thought that was a bit early, but I wasn't going to argue with him about that. "No problem?" Peter asked when I walked through the door again. " No, as long as we're home before 10 and I think if we catch an early movie that shouldn't be a problem, will it?" "No, I think we'll make it on time," Andrew replied. So we walked in the direction of one of the larger cinemas in town. It had about ten big screens and showed various kind of movies. "What do you guys think about The Discovery of Heaven?" Andrew asked. "Sounds good, but I'd probably say that about anything at this point, Andrew, as long as I can sit down," Francis replied. "Oh, are you that tired, my baby?" I said, patting him on his back. "You know I am, Nick, and I think you feel the same." Andrew bought the tickets and came back with us to the food court where they (Peter and Andrew) got some hamburgers with fries and Francis and I went more towards salad stuff. "So, what have you guys been up to lately?" Andrew asked. "Well, training, and thinking about training, and feeling that we've been training ...," I started. "Beside that, you fool." "Oh, well, we had a nice time at Andy and Brian's place last Sunday. We relaxed a bit and enjoyed a sauna." "Wow, you didn't!" Andrew said. "I've always wanted to try something like that once. How was it?" So over the next 15 minutes we talked about what a good time we had and how it felt and, of course, how we were dressed. If that wasn't on everyone's mind about going to a sauna, then I am not sure what they were thinking about. "So, you liked it Nick?" Peter asked. "Yes, I did, and I think we need to find ourselves a nice place where we can do this together. I think you'd like it, too." "Sounds good to me. Maybe in the week after your meet, just before the exams?" Andrew proposed. "OK by me and ...." "Well, I can see the look on your face, Francis, so you don't need to say a lot. I'll see if I can find a nice place and keep you informed." "Good, so you're going to be able to join us this weekend for a nice relaxing time somewhere?" "Yes, I though we'd agreed on that already, Nick." "Did you hear anything from Kathy, Nick?" Francis continued. "No, not yet. I'll have to call her tonight to see if she did that." "Good. I'd love to go back down there again together with friends," Peter said. "OK, guys. The movie starts in about 10 minutes, so let's go." Not a lot was said during the movie and I was right: both Francis and I had a hard time keeping awake. Not that the movie was bad, not at all, but still it was a long one. The young guy in it was cute, especially at the end when he didn't wear more then a very short, tight white towel. A nice movie with a good performance from the English actor Stephen Frye, too. We went straight home after the movie was over. We agreed that I would call Andrew and Peter about the exact plans for Saturday evening. "Francis, do you want to join me in my room for a while?" "Are you sure? I thought you wanted to go to sleep." "I know, but I'd like to talk with you for a bit. With everything going on, we haven't done that lately very much." "OK, you don't think your dad will mind? It's almost 10 p.m." "I know, but I told him we'd be up for another hour or so and he was fine with it." "OK, let me change in something more comfortable and then I'll join you." I opened the door and went into my bedroom. I was still not sure how things would go that evening, but I knew that it was important to talk about this with Francis as it was part of how I felt. His actions last night had made that clear to me. It was something that I couldn't deny any more. Looking back at my talk with the doc, I was surprised that he agreed with my plan, or even that I was able to talk with him about my feelings at all. At first, I found it strange to talk with him about this stuff. But at some point I was able to tell him more, first about the things that happened with me when my mother left and what that had done to my confidence about life and everything. Then, slowly, we started to go deeper into things that happened to the point of the attempt to kill myself. I managed to talk about the events with Mike and the doctors, but it was not easy. First, it felt like I was telling a story that had not happened to me, but with the right questions my shrink made me go beyond that point. To be able to do that was testimony to his success in dealing with me. The trust that had started to build up between us was very important and he gave me the feeling that I was safe with him. So, when today I went deeper into the feelings that I had, he was very open about what he thought about what I'd said, and he didn't try to make my feelings insignificant or anything but he respected them. I'd thought that his answer would be that I couldn't know how I felt because I was so young but he didn't say that and was very respectful about what I said. Together we came to the conclusion that I needed to trust Francis on this point and that he needed to know how I felt when he did certain things to me. I never thought I'd ever be able to talk to him about my submissive feelings, but the subject had been bothering me in the past few days and I felt that I needed to get it out of the way. The shrink said that I could wait forever to talk to him, but that it would be something that would always be an issue between us. We agreed that I would try to tell Francis a bit tonight and that we could go into things in greater depth when we had our meeting. I knew that I needed someone else around if I was going to talk about those experiences with Francis, someone uninvolved and neutral. I sat down on my bed and waited for Francis to come back. I waited and my eyes were focused on the carpet for some time. Lost in my own thought, I didn't hear him come in. A slight tap on my shoulder made me come back to the real world. I looked up into his face. "Welcome back, Nick. Some deep thoughts?" "Sorry I didn't hear you come in. There's just so much to think about." Nothing was said then for a moment. I think he was waiting for me to continue but I just had no idea how to proceed. He sat down beside me on the bed. I realized he was dressed in a tight black t-shirt. The sculpted lines of his body showed up perfectly in it. He was almost ready for bed, as he also wore red boxer shorts. Hmm, pretty sexy, I thought. When I looked back to his face he smiled wryly. "Hmm, you like what you see, Nick?" I started to blush. He seemed to have seen what I'd done but, when I looked back to him, I saw a big smile on his face. "Don't be embaressed about it, Nick. So you wanted to talk? Has this got anything to do with what's been bothering you during the last two days?" "I think so, Francis, but I'm not sure where to start." "You know you can tell me anything, Nick. I love you. There is nothing more that I want more than to share your joys and your problems. That is what a relationship is all about, sharing feelings, positive and negative." "I know, Francis, but you know I have little experience with this, and we haven't really talked a lot about us, you know." "Yes, I know the feeling. It seems there is always something else to keep us busy, such as your decision to get involved with the gymnastic stuff. We talk about what is happening immediately in our lives, but we can talk about important stuff as well. I just want to know what is happening to you, what your thoughts are about what's happening. And, if I see you worried, I always hope you can share it with me." "I know that, but there is a difference between knowing it and being able to do it." "Well, you can give it time. There's no need to hurry." "No, Francis. I think I need to talk with you about this. I had a good session with the shrink today and he helped me quite a bit with it. But that is not enough. I need to tell you about it." "Good. Well, I'm here to listen and to help you with whatever is bothering you." I just let my head rest on his shoulder while I hugged him gently. I think I needed that contact to build up the courage to start saying the things I wanted to tell him. "I don't know if I can tell it all now, Francis, but I'll try to give you at least an idea what happened and why I've been so distracted the last two days. It all started Sunday evening, Francis, or even Sunday afternoon with my talk with James ... but that has to wait for another time to tell you about." I saw Francis looking strangely at me as I paused for a minute to find the best point to begin. "Sunday evening, we were together in my room, as you'll remember." "Yes, but nothing strange happened then ... or did I miss something, Nick?" he said softly. "Well, nothing you probably could have noticed but ... well, I had fun a lot of fun as you might remember but there was more." "More?" Francis said softly again. "Yes ... well, more in a way that we hadn't previously tried ... more in a way that upset me, Francis. I really enjoyed the way we made love last Sunday evening." "Yea ... well, you know I like to play and have fun ...but that's something we've done before." "This will be difficult to explain, Francis. It had nothing to do with what you did ... or maybe it did ... but more with the feelings it awoke in me." I just looked at his face to see if there was any reaction to what I'd said. "Go on," he said, looking worried but also interested and concerned. "Well, when you started to ... ah ... squeeze my dick and later on when you started to make me cum for a second time, it gave me feelings that I didn't had for some time, but which I also liked very much. You know that I have been talking with the shrink during the last few weeks about what happened with Mike and I'm not sure if that is part of the reason why I felt like I did." I just then realized that maybe what I'd said was true. Did the talks with my shrink about Mike trigger the feelings again, or was there something else? I continued. "At first, my feelings were very confusing. I couldn't keep them back, so I just let myself go with the rhythm and flow of what you were doing. I think that is the reason why you didn't notice anything. But during the night and the next morning, it started to bother me more and more because I had no idea where these feelings came from or what I could do about them. I never wanted to be in a situation like the one I'd been in with Mike. At the same time, it did it, and the memory of doing it gave me very special feelings. Maybe I can give you one example: the moment you started to squeeze me, you hurt me a little bit at ...." I wanted to continue but I saw some tears form in Francis's eyes. "I never meant that, Nick," he said softly in a shaky voice. "Don't worry, Francis. Maybe pain was not the right word but it was a pain that also gave me pleasure, pleasure that made me harder and very horny." This time I saw him looking at me with a big question mark on his face. I knew this was difficult but I never thought it would be this difficult. "You know, Francis, that we have talked about what happened with Mike. I thought that I did it because I was forced into it, but now I am just not sure anymore. I'm not sure that I can explain it any clearer, but it is something that I thought about a lot after Sunday evening. I talked with the shrink about it, and he said it was something that I needed to share with you. I really wanted to talk with you but, I must be honest with you, I was a bit afraid of your reaction. I hope you'll give me time to explore these feelings, and I hope you won't be angry with me if I want you to stop ... well, doing stuff if I get confused or anything." At this point, I stopped looking at his face and stared down at the ground. I was afraid of his rejection. A hand was put under my chin and he slowly brought my eyes back up to his. "Whatever keeps you busy ... whatever happens to you ... whatever scares you ... or whatever you decide you like ... I can only find out about things if you speak with me. So never worry about telling me anything while we're making love. Slowly we'll get to know each other on every level, and then saying things will be less necessary ... but if there is anything that you don't like, tell me, OK?" "So, you're not troubled by this at all?" " No, Nick. The only thing that troubles me is when you shut me out and you don't talk with me. Then I can only worry about what's happening and I can't help you with it. So talk to em whenever you feel like it." I gave him a big hugssss. "Sorry, Francis, but with all that's happened, this is not easy and ... well, you know I was so surprised with it all, there was no way I could get it out." "I'm glad the shrink was able to help you in this situation. But, as you know, it's important to talk with someone about these sorts of things ... so just make sure you do. Then I'll be alright and when you want to talk to me, tell me when you're ready for it." "So, you wouldn't mind going with me to the shrink after the meet to talk about all this, Francis? I'm not sure I could talk about it all without him being there, but if you don't want to go, then I can try to do it with you alone." "Well, whatever you like. If you want the shrink to be there, that's fine. Maybe he can even give me some advice on the situation with my mother. You're not the only one that is bothered by stuff, Nick," he said, giggling, so I knew he didn't mean that in a very serious way. We sat in silence for a while, just enjoying each other. "You're really OK with this, Francis?" "Yea, Nick, I am. You know I always wondered about it. I have no idea what you feel when stuff like that happens to you, but I'm not surprised that it all came back to haunt you. I think I read somewhere that feelings like you had can be very strong. You don't have to be forced but even with partners playing, it can happen. So I think I always knew that one day you would open up and talk with me about what happened with Mike". "Oh ...," I said, not able to say more then that. "So you stop worrying about me and I'll do the same about you. We'll just go with the flow and see where it brings us. As long, Nick, as you're open with me and tell me if I need to stop doing things." "I thought that I was going to drive you away from me by talking about it. Like last time in the shower. I'm sure you've done things with Brian that we haven't done yet and I think you want to try them as well but ...." Tears started to run over my cheeks. "Shush, Nick. That will all happen when we're both ready for it, so don't worry. I'm happy just with being with you and having fun." "I know, Francis, but some parts of me want it, I really do ... but others are just very scared of it all." "Well, just don't force it and let me know whenever you feel you're ready for it." "Thanks. You are wonderful, Francis." "So, will this make it easier for you to perform at the meet in ten days, Nick?" "I hope so. Although today was pretty exhausting. I'm not sure if I can keep this up for another nine days." "Don't worry. That's something that probably won't happen. I think we'll have a few more days like this and then, after the weekend, we'll probably go easier on and maybe even do nothing for the last two days or so." "Ah, well. That sounds good, as I'm sure I could use some rest before the meet." "We will and I'm sure we'll have two great weekends coming up. First, Randy's visit and the party we're going to hold on the Saturday and then the weekend afterwards, celebrating our victory." "Oh, don't you think you're being a bit too hasty, Francis? Let's just try to do our best and I'll be happy if we finish in the top three." "Hmm ... never, Nick, aim for anything less than first place or you'll never be able to get there." "You think so?" "Well, that's what I've been told many times, and that advice helps me to keep focused on stuff." "Hmm. If everyone thinks that way, it doesn't work, does it, as there can only be one winner." "Oh, yea ... smartmouth, Nick," he said laughing and pushing me back on the bed. I saw that this time Francis was checking me out and, to be honest, that was not very difficult to do. As usual, being close to him had given me a boner ... not a very big one yet but it was there. "Ahhh. You're starting to wake up again, Nick, now that it's almost bed time. I thought you said you'd no energy left anymore?" I blushed a bit. "Well, you know me ... always some energy left to keep it up around you." He laughed again. "Yeah, smooth talk. But, to be honest, I'm a bit tired myself, so I think we'd better go to sleep now and don't misuse your father's hour to do stuff we know he won't like. I think that I might even fall asleep beside you if we did anything." "Oh, yeah ... first make me hot and then walk away! That's easy. Well, that leaves me with only my hand to help it to go down again, I guess," I said with a lot of mischief in my voice. "Oh, you think that whining at me will help? Sorry, Nick, but I'm stronger than you and I want to hold off until we have some real time to play, such as Friday evening. That'll be more fun." "Ahhh. Is that the plan? Well, maybe I'll see if I can do the same," I said, smiling at the thought of having a good time on Friday. "Well, good night, Nick. Pleasant but dry dreams," he said just before he kissed me on the lips. He wanted just to give me a light kiss but I had other plans. I made sure that my lips attached to his a bit harder. Slowly he opened his lips for me and I started to do some research with my tongue on the inner side of his cheeks ... first slowly and then a bit harder. At the end, I had to stop as I need to breathe. He looked at me, smiled, and then said, "If you think that that would change my mind, then you are wrong, Nick. Goodnight." He walked towards the door and I did a soft wolf whistle when he bent forward a bit to get the door handle. He looked back, smiled again and repeated, "Sweet dry dreams, Nick." He left my room and I thought, damn!!! Here I was, hard and horny and Francis had more or less told me he wouldn't do anything about his hardness, so how could I do anything about mine? Well, I'd better not and wait until Friday, just like he was going to do. I stood up and started to undress. I got into my bed and it didn't take me long before I was in dreamland. * If you want to read more go visit my website at: www.geocities.com/timsfunplace or let me know what you think of the story, noway16@hotmail.com or bye ICQ: 36967366