Date: Sun, 24 Mar 2019 18:51:43 -0400
From: Stanley Wright <wrights841@gmail.com>
Subject: Gay > College > Finding Myself

Finding Myself
Chapter Two

Welcome to my story on Nifty. Please be sure to donate to this awesome site
where we get to share and enjoy our literary creations.

Disclaimer: If this story is illegal for you to read, please do not. It's a
tale of my adventures of embarking upon life as a recent high school
graduate, and finding myself. The experience is real, but the names and
locations have been altered. Enjoy!

I survived senior week pretty much unscathed. It was a great time, but I
never wanted to taste Jack Daniels ever again! Certainly my mind was
spinning from the actions that Patrick and I had started while sharing the
hotel room with 4 other jocky type straight or dl curious. What had come
over me? What in the hell was I thinking? Did I really want that, or was I
just caught in a moment.

While I had always been curious of my ass and did my own self explorations,
playing with my pucker, I never found myself yearning to get fucked. Until
senior week, I never felt another hand other than my own, exploring my ass
while filled with such lust. What a mind trip! In fact, in my mind, I
always envisioned any type of anal sex would find me fucking the dude. I
imagined it would be too painful to be enjoyable, but I'd be happy to sink
my dick in a nice tight ass. So I left the beach an excited confused free
adult. Well kinda...I was still 17. My birthday is in December, so while I
was a high school graduate starting college, I wouldn't be 18 until that
winter.

We all returned back home from the beach and resumed normal life. I was
settling into my summer routine with my job and figuring out my next steps
in life. I worked full time at a local park and things were in swing! Evan
did not go to the beach for senior week. He seemed content to roll into the
summer, coasting on the parent's dime. He also attended the vo-tech school
during high school, studying plumbing. I suppose he was supposed to be
groomed for employment? Instead, he and his friends, usually 3-5 single
guys that never mentioned a girlfriend, really enjoyed smoking pot and
drinking. That was fun once in a while...but not all of the time. We'd get
together along the way and hang out, and enjoyed his family's membership to
the local pool. Any chance to see him shirtless in his board shorts was a
good day for me.

As a skateboarder, he had a tight body with the v waist that emerged from
his waistband, on display for all to enjoy. He was pretty smooth with some
hair in his armpits. He had a slight treasure trail set in the middle of
that v, and I continually wondered what as at the end of that trail in his
shorts. It could've been the fabric, my imagination or the real deal. I
wasn't sure despite seeing him in his boxers before. But there seemed to be
the impression of a nice slightly chubbed dick, hiding beneath the
fabric. It was noticeable to me the last few times at the pool. Maybe I was
just horny! I would imagine Evan's dick during some of my jerk off
sessions, especially after spending an afternoon with him at the pool. I
imagined it to be uncut, about 7" with his hood. Medium thickness with a
slight constant chub arching his dick out and over away from his body like
a faucet. Just sticking out, waiting for some attention in my mouth. But
our times were always casual time with a friend that I appreciated and
admired. Still nothing sexual! He was just one that I secretly lusted after
as well. I always felt like my groups of friends could form the shape of a
star around me. With me in the center, each five points of the star would
be my different groups of close friends, as they all existed within their
own social circles and didn't overlap.

About two weeks after being home from the beach, Patrick had reached out
about going to a party with Michael and Sarah. I knew Michael vaguely from
mutual friends, but Sarah was just a face I recalled from around
school. Fake blonde, pale, black wardrobe and dark lipstick. Just rolled to
the beat of her own drum. I'd see her in the halls but we never had any
classes together or interactions and did not know each other. She was very
pretty despite her stark appearance.  I accepted the invite to the party,
figuring why not, this is the summer before college!

I planned to stay local, live at home, attend community college and work. I
was not a stand out student; therefore scholarships and going away to
college were not top of mind. But I really never dreamed of that whole
experience, and was content. I'd be in good company as I had friends with
similar plans as they navigated their next steps after high school. As it
turned out..Patrick, Michael and Sarah all were staying local and we all
became great friends after that party. A sorta dynamic quad always together
that summer. Social opportunities were rampant that summer and we always
arrived as a foursome, spending a lot of time together most of that
summer. It was awesome, and I became great friends with Sarah and Michael,
and even more so with Patrick. However; along the way, feelings were
starting to develop within the quad.

It was becoming obvious that Michael and Karen were taking a liking to each
other. I don't blame them. Sarah scaled back the stark appearance. She
actually wore clothes that weren't black, toned down the make-up and was
quite gorgeous. Dumb as a box of rocks, but she was a doll! Michael was a
hunk and recently broke up with his long term high school sweetheart right
before graduation. She was going away to college, he wasn't, and they
decided to end it. He had brown hair, and brown goatee, olive skin, always
wore a baseball cap and was a lacrosse player. What more can I say?
Although while I thought he was hot as fuck, he wasn't my kinda hot as
fuck. I certainly enjoyed his physical appearance, even that dark hair on
those tan sexy legs appearing beneath his lacrosse shorts. But he too was
not setting the world on fire with his smarts, so I was happy for him and
Sarah to explore whatever they stumbled upon. By August, the nights would
end earlier at times, leaving Patrick and I on the curb as Michael and
Sarah drove off. Some nights we would part ways, or some nights we'd head
back to my house. While Patrick and I continued to spend time together that
summer, the senior week thing was never mentioned. If you recall, Patrick
had his way of making jokes that could sometimes make you wonder. Like how
he would flirt joke with Tony in class. Perhaps a bit passive aggressive,
in hindsight. Regardless, senior week was never mentioned until one night
after getting left on the curb after an early night.

We had gone to a party and indulged in some beer and a couple hits of a
joint being passed around. So we each had a buzz. Once we got back to my
house and were up in my room, Patrick was leaning back on my bed as I sat
in the computer chair. We had the black light on and incense
burning. Ahhh...life in the 90's! At one point Patrick was looking at me
and started laughing. I smiled and asked what was funny. Still laughing, he
put his hands up to his face and covered his eyes while shaking his head
side to side, like motioning No. I giggled and continued to smile while
perplexed, as he continued to laugh and finally uncovered his face
revealing a smile.

After a few seconds, he says "Can you believe that morning at the beach?
What were we thinking?" and giggled a bit. I smiled and agreed that it was
crazy for us to be so daring with the guys in the room.  Silence came
between us until he spoke again, a bit serious but not stern. Just matter
factual.

He stated "Stan, I've been very confused by you. I know that we have fooled
around and had some fun times. Hell, I've had some fun being sexual with
other guys too. But no one has invited me to fuck them, and I hadn't really
thought about it until you pulled me into your ass that morning. Now I
can't stop thinking about it. That sensation of the tip of my dick oozing
precum, sliding against your cherry. I'm surprised I didn't cum all over
your ass. It was incredible and I've been hoping that we'd try again. But
you've never mentioned it and seem to pretend it never happened. In fact,
this entire summer you've avoided me and my advances to have some fun like
we use to." Immediately my brain is panicking, as I had never thought that
deep into my actions of offering him to fuck me. Once senior week was over,
it was in the past, just like all of the random hookups that occurred that
week.

As I said, I never really desired to be fucked and to be honest; I had not
really been acting on any attractions or feelings all summer. While I did
ignore a few of his advances, I was simply having the best summertime with
a group of friends in the newfound freedom I was feeling as being a recent
graduate into life as an adult. Despite my sexual curiosities of guys and
strong attraction towards them, and the fun Patrick and I enjoyed during
high school, it seemed as though my desires were more to admire and wonder
about guys, such as Evan as I stroked my thick 6" dick to glorious orgasms,
versus pursuing anything with Patrick or any other guy, or even a
girl. Seemed easiest that way as I sorted through the feelings in my head.

I looked down at the ground letting his words sink in and try and calm the
panic inside of me. Slowly I look up at him, returning his gaze and
friendly smile on his face. I'm speechless for at least a minute, holding a
smile on my face. Finally I exhale and admit "You're right, I confused
myself Patrick. I'm not sure what came over me, but I was enjoying the
moment with you. When you reached around and grabbed my dick, it felt so
hard in your grip. To reach back under the covers and feel that thick dick
of yours, it unleashed something in me that I never experienced
before. Knowing the four other jock guys were sleeping in beds next to
use...it was fucking hot!" I pause and look around the room trying to
gather my thoughts. I glance at Patrick and he still has the silly smile on
his face, intuned with me and waiting for me to continue.

Patrick is also a very handsome guy. He's 5'11," medium complexion with
short black hair faded on the sides. He liked to dress preppy, but easily
could rock with the athletic casual look as well. As I mentioned, while in
school, his fashion style was very fresh, and that flowed into his summer
wardrobe as well. While he was put together very nicely and I found Patrick
sexy, smart and funny, along with his impressive dick, again I was not
feeling as thought he was my type. While I enjoyed our time at the beach,
and have jerked off to certain memories, the confused feelings almost made
me want to retreat from him. However; I've certainly yearned to swap
blowjobs with him and suck his big dick down my throat.

I miss having my lips wrapped around his hard flesh, fucking my mouth until
he blasts his 4 or 5 bursts of hot cum into my mouth. I will admit that I
always enjoyed the sensation of him shooting his cum into my mouth. The
element of surprise when that first blast hits your throat, tongue or the
roof of your mouth, with others to follow. Being the recipient of this
powerful release from a hard dick in your mouth as he emits a grunt and
slight squeal riding the orgasm that overcomes him.  That's awesome and
amazing..but in a 17 year old mind, it's overwhelming. Adding ass fucking
to that, and I was mindblown!

I look at him and begin to speak again "I've not brought it up since the
beach, because I honestly don't know what the fuck I was thinking. In that
moment, I really wanted to feel the strength of your long and thick dick
inside of me. I've never wanted it more than I did that morning. That's why
I kept pushing against your dick hoping my ass would open and let you in."
As I was talking my eyes wandered a bit but returned to Patrick as I ended
that sentence. Then I started laughing and said "I think we should've known
as high school graduates that we were going to need more lube than your
precum to fit that big dick in my ass." It was totally inappropriate, but I
felt the joke, and probably due to my buzz, found it funny. So I said it. I
wanted to lighten the mood and steer this conversation to a new topic but
Patrick didn't react.

Still looking at me, but with an endearing face, he reaches into his pocket
and pulls out a small bottle of KY and holds it into the air. Cracking a
smile on his face.

Thanks for reading and I welcome your thoughts at wrights841@gmail.com. I
can't change the story or the characters, but I could try and change how
the story is told. This is my second attempt at writing and composing a
story to share here on Nifty. - Stan