Date: Tue, 1 Jan 2008 22:41:12 -0600 From: charles Turner Subject: Henry Lee Henry Lee had been kicked out of the college where he was hoping to study forestry for seducing the Dean's nineteen year old son. It wasn't punishable by prison time since both boys were underage and hadn't been caught in action, but it certainly didn't please the Dean. Up until the time he had gone to the college Henry Lee had remained a virgin except for a few times with his own hand, for years he had been uncertain whether he would ever act on his desire to have other men pleasuring him, particularly allowing him the pleasure of their butts. He had made it through a year and a half of his classes before he met Eric, in earlier centuries the boy would have been called a quadroon, his father was a white ball of fat and his mother was a short thin mulatto. The mixed racial background was a handicap for Eric in the conservative Christian college where his father had decided to create their home. Eric and Henry excelled at many activities, but socializing was not one of them. If the students had been exposed to a little more fine art they would have seen the resemblance Eric had to Donatello's David and perhaps Henry Lee would have had competition for his affection. Henry Lee and Eric met in the required physical education classes, because neither had many acquaintances and didn't excell physically they usually ended up paired together when it was an activity like handball or two member teams or buddy sports like diving and swimming. After their freshman year the boys found they could talk to the other without too many obstacles between reticence and truth, they would spend an hour or so after class in the student lounge drinking coffee and talking about the professors they shared. Henry Lee's family was poor and he was attending the school on a state scholarship, there weren't many opportunities for him to go home on weekends or holidays so he and Eric often spent partial days together on holidays and vacations when the small mountain school was otherwise deserted. Thanksgiving weekend of the boys' sophomore year the Dean and his wife went on a second honeymoon, leaving Eric with the president of the college and his wife. It was the first time in Eric's life that he wasn't completely under an adult's thumb and he stayed in the dorm with Henry Lee until late on Friday night and ended up locked in the building. The following morning the president of the college found Eric in Henry Lee's arms with his hand wrapped around his friend's rigid dick. The one night of subdued passion was the beginning of a month of losses for Henry Lee. He was expelled from the school without a hearing, a chance to explain the unspeakable or proclaim his love. Waiting at the bus station for the bus back home Eric found him and promised to stay in touch so that one day soon they could continue the exploration that had resulted in his defloration and more pleasure than he had ever expected to have in his life. Henry Lee wasn't home even a week when his father was told he had the choice of being laid off or moving to northern Georgia to continue his job as crew chief in a granite quarry. Other than his wife, the company would only move one other family member and she wouldn't go to Georgia unless they took her aged father along, the family ws too poor to move Henry Lee on their own. His mother and father had accepted Henry Lee when he came home from school disgraced, but were of the firm opinion that the time had come for him to move out on his own. He couldn't stay in the family home since it didn't belong to them, but if he wanted to live thirty miles from the nearest neighbor he could live in his grandfather's house, he had a family homestead contract with the federal government that had bought the land for a nature preserve. The young man was still trying to get past the heartbreak of his first love gone bad and chose to move high up on the densely forested mountain and live in the one bedroom cabin by himself for at least a year. Wanting the best for their son, father, mother and grandfather promised Henry Lee that they would send him a small amount of money every month so that he could supplement a diet of wild game with store bought provisions. Arrangements were made with a distant cousin of his mother that lived in the closest town to truck the food stuffs out to a distant fraternal cousin that would be his closest neighbor. It was a simple arrangement of a grocery list and supplies being taken to the intermediate one month and the goods arriving the next. During the summer he would fetch the goods by tractor and a small wagon that his grandfather left behind, in the winter he was able to use the tractor as a snow cat to get the food and roam however far he needed, to find meat. The existance of a hermit would be miserable for most people, but Henry Lee found that he was happier living alone than he had ever been when surrounded by family or school mates. Days he spent either hunting or patroling the mountain to be certain that there were no trespassers on the preserve, a job that his grandfather had agreed to do for the government. Evenings and nights he spent attempting to write a maifesto that proclaimed the value and honorable nature of same sex relationships. On the odd day or evening when missing Eric overcame his good intentions he allowed himself to sink into a funk that permitted no intrusions. Cut off from society and the small towns surrounding the mountain range Henry Lee wasn't aware of changes occurring in the world. He never heard about the Vietnam War, hippies. LSD, Baby Boomers, or the prison built at the base of the mountain on the side away from his grandfather's house. In the first twenty years he spent alone Henry Lee spoke once a month and then he was mostly monosylabic, speaking to his father's cousin only when asked a question. Living in the world without Eric was more than he was willing to face. Surprisingly for a vital, otherwise healthy man Henry Lee had lost all sexual desire on the day he boarded the bus to return home. None of the dreams he had earlier in his life about enjoying the pleasure of making love to other men intruded on his solitude. Even when working on his manifesto, thinking about Eric he had only the slightest twinge of desire, never enough to cause him discomfort not demand relief. Years passed with the only recognition by Henry Lee being the seasonal addition and removal of chains on the tractor. He turned forty-one without realizing the number of years that had passed. It was December of 1999 when Henry Lee received word that his parents had been in an automobile accident and were in a hospital, not expected to live. For the first time in twenty five years Henry Lee left his mountain retreat, with his relatives he rode to Georgia, arriving too late to speak with either parent. Having lived alone for twenty five years he was now truly alone. Providentially his mother had placed her father's money in an account for her son so Henry Lee would never need to leave his mountain aerie to make a living. He was amazed by all the changes that had occurred in the world, but wasn't intrigued enough to spend an extra day off the mountain. It was while riding back that Henry Lee first saw the prison that sat at the southern base of mountain ridge where he lived. The imposition of civilization into his corner of the world might have registered with him if he had known that shortly after the new year broke escaped prisoners were going to change his life. There had been very little room in the car to tote many of his parents' possessions back to the mountain, his mother's cousin had bundled all the paperwork she found together and some pictures. Henry Lee had found he could wear clothes his father had left, so he had packed up what would be useful on the mountain. The rest of what was left in this world was given to a local charity. At the funeral there had been less than forty people, most of which had worked with his father in the quarry. There were many expressions of condolence but not one person from their new life in Georgia knew that Henry Lee had truly lost his parents twenty five years earlier when they left him on the mountain. If he hadn't been at his mother's cousin's home when the message arrived he wouldn't have taken the time to see them off this earth, having already taken his leave the day they packed their truck and drove south. Returning to his mountain Henry Lee once again revelled in the peace and quiet that thirty miles and a blanket of snow guaranteed. For a week he only left the cabin to make his way to the outhouse. A heavy wet snow had fallen while he was gone and the paths and roads he used were impassable like they often were for much of the winter. The work he had done during the year stocking up food and wood let him burrow under quilts his foremothers had made and go through the paperwork retrieved from his parents' house. There was very little that interested him in the stash, but he knew that he should try to get through it all in case there was anything that threatened his life on the mountain. It was on the third evening of reading that Henry Lee found the letters that his mother had never forwarded to him that had been written by Eric. 12/8/1975 H.L Life here on campus without you is miserable. My parents have made me a virtual prisoner in the house. I am being punished for the one chance I have had in seventeen years of finding love. I hope your reception at home has been better. If you are doing well and still want to meet me on New Year's Eve like you said at the bus station I will figure out a way to escape the oppressive life of a Dean's son. Please let me know what to do. To the first and only, Eric Over the many years he spent alone he had been depressed on many occassions, but reading the words of his only lover the tears that had remained bottled up for twenty-five years flowed over his cheeks. Henry Lee had been afraid to write to Eric at his parents and had waited for word from the only man that had ever fulfilled his dreams before responding. Part of what had broken his heart had been that Eric hadn't gotten word to him about what he hoped would be their future together. 12/24/1975 Dear H.L., Why haven't you returned word to me? There is only a week until the night we agreed to meet, I feel deserted by the lack of word from the man who took my virginity and my love. My father watches my every movement while I'm not in class, yet I have been by the mail boxes in the student union that hold unclaimed mail, twice. What is holding you back, my love? Do you not love me the way I love you? I hope you know that I have remained true to you and will not give up what is yours to another. If I don't hear from you my love I will try someday to find a wife. To the one and only, Eric That night Henry Lee sleep restlessly wondering why his mother had never given him the letters that would might changed his life. By the time the sun rose and Henry Lee rose to tend the fire he was angry at his mother and the unnecessary course of solitude his life had taken. Not once in twenty-five years had the man felt any anger, not towards Eric, his own family for moving away or even the dean that felt he was protecting his son. As the hours progressed his anger increased and the cabin that had fit perfectly for all those years was too small to hold him. With barely enough clothes to keep him from freezing during the day Henry Lee blundered out into the cold and snow blinded by the anger that needed an escape, he tried spliting wood but the physical exercise was not enough to diminish the pain. Finally he grabbed a gun from a rack of old rifles and shotguns his grandfather had left in the cabin and set out to kill, what he killed didn't matter to Henry Lee, all that mattered was the desire to wreck vengeance on the world. The sun had begun to set and the only shots he had taken were wild. The turkeys that had flown out of the lowest branches of a small stand of young oaks had all escaped his anger. Even overwhelming anger was not enough to make him stupid, feeling the temperature beginning to drop Henry Lee headed towards the cabin. He was still out of sight of his place when he heard an unusual noise, a pack of dogs baying lower on the mountain. He didn't hate dogs, but he had more than once shot stray dogs that wandered onto the mountain because they chased the wild game from the preserve to areas where poachers could kill. For Henry Lee to hear a pack of dogs was a warning that the food supply on the mountain was in danger if he did not act. Hunting dogs is a difficult business, they are much like wolves and can cover a lot of territory in a short while. They can remain hidden if they wish and may turn on the hunter if surprised or feel they are in danger. Henry Lee hated losing one wild animal to the dogs but the darkness that was descending would bring more coldness than he was equipped to stand. Warming up in the cabin Henry Lee heard the dogs coming closer and closer. Throughout the quick dinner he fixed, he wondered why a pack of dogs was that far away from humans. Angry as he was he knew better than to start out in complete darkness, the moon that had been poking through the clouds when he entered the cabin had disappeared, taking his chance to search for the dogs with it. For the first time in twenty-five years Henry Lee was awakened by noises in the night, the dogs interrupted his peace over and over again. With morning close the disturbances had made him give up on going back to a sound sleep so Henry Lee trudged from the cabin to the outhouse. In the dimness he tripped over a shivering Bloodhound that pranced around the front of the outhouse, looking up from the ground he saw two more dogs guarding the door. In all his time on the mountain Henry Lee had never seen a dog wearing a vest, so the orange vests on the three dogs drew his attention. When he saw that the dogs belonged to the Bureau of Prisons he slowly put together what was happening. After a quick piss against a tree he stumbled to the house through the deep ground cover and grabbed a loaded rifle. He didn't think a prisoner would be too much problem this morning after being out in the bitter wind and freezing snow all night following a long hike the previous day. When he threw open the door to the outhouse he found not one but three escapees huddled together on the filthy floor. The prison issued red and white jumpsuits they clutched around them had been shredded by the run through the forest and fields. The three men looked up at the rifle with almost no hope. Their escape had left them worse off than they started and the rifle poked towards their face was more unfriendly than any they had seen in the hands of the guards. Henry Lee had to swat at the dogs with his rifle to keep them from attacking the three men. He didn't know their crimes, but he was a man of compassion and couldn't stand to see humans mauled by hungry animals. Patiently keeping the dogs and men separated he managed to get them all into the warmth of the cabin. He understood by looking at the shackles around the men's ankles that he needed to be firm in his control of the situation and not allow them to get a jump on him, yet he wanted to let them warm up and dry off. Looking at the shredded jumpsuits Henry Lee ordered the men to toss them aside and turn with their backs to the fireplace. The exposed flesh of three men, all younger and fitter than himself, jarred Henry Lee. The hibernating desire for another man that lived within him woke, the realization that he was thinking of sex and dominating the men that he now held prisoner surprised the man whose every prior thought of sex had been connected to love. With the prisoners warming by the fire Henry Lee fixed a breakfast for humans and dogs alike, he wasn't much of a cook, but he knew any hot food and drink would be welcomed by all his visitors. Finally over their meal Henry began to learn why the men had tried to escape the prison. Surprisingly it wasn't freedom they wanted but decent treatment, the prison was a nightmare of abuse. Prisoners were beaten, starved and abused, physically, mentally and sexually by both guards and other prisoners. The prison warden seemed not to care as long as there were no riots and any deaths could be explained. Henry Lee felt bad for the prisoners but was wise enough to know that they might be trying to con him. The stories they told of how badly the guards treated the prisoners and the prettiest man's tales of repeated rape by both guards and other prisoners were too vivid to have been completely false, Henry Lee knew that he would have once lusted after the man's tight butt and muscular body. Henry Lee didn't want to know why they were in the prison but the men confessed that they had been sentenced to serve their time for growing and selling marijuana. When Henry Lee had been in school there had been marijuana available on campus and much discussion about whether it should be legal or illegal; he had never partaken, not because of the legal questions but because he didn't like the smell of the smoke. The prisoners were still telling him about the times they had been beaten for trying to escape the gangs that ruled the cell blocks when the dogs let them know that there were people outside. It was a quick decision of his part, but he couldn't see what else to do. When Henry Lee went to the door he carried the rifle he had held onto the entire morning. He wasn't the Rifleman, but Henry Lee had learned to shoot the rifle from his hip, an unusual position that didn't seem threatening to the men circling the cabin. It wasn't until he put a shot into the ground in front of the men that they stopped. There were demands made for the return of the prisoners, demands that Henry Lee was certain would entail more abuse of the men so he made a demand that the warden come to the cabin to retrieve them. As a gesture of his seriousness Henry Lee let the dogs out the door with the men's jumpsuits threaded through their collars. Locked in the cabin with three prisoners Henry Lee wasn't very comfortable but he refused to be part of their mistreatment. Even with the shackles on their legs and Henry Lee holding a rifle the odds were in favor of the prisoners if they had only known that he wouldn't shoot them. He had warned them that he would, but it was bluster. For the entire day and all night the men outside called threats and demands towards the house, none of which Henry Lee answered, he had made his demand and the move was up to them. On the second afternoon the sound of a helicopter buzzing the forest searching for a place to sit down disturbed the quiet that had settled around the cabin. An hour passed before Henry Lee was hailed from the clearing in front of the cabin where the men chasing the prisoners had built a fire to stay warm. When he looked out the door a new person had joined the group, he wasn't dressed like the others, he wore a leather overcoat and a fur hat. Through the collar Henry Lee could see that the man wore a tie around his neck so he assumed that this might be the warden. After a few minutes of talk the warden was invited in and Henry Lee agreed to leave the door open so they could be seen from the yard. Only upon dropping the coat and turning towards Henry Lee did the warden recognize the man standing in the cabin as his one-time lover. The man with the rifle had changed very little other than to begin showing age in the skin of his face and hands while Eric had gained two hundred pounds, lost his hair and now wore thick glasses. He was not surprised that Henry Lee did not recognize him, he often didn't recognize himself in the mirror while getting ready for work. That after twenty-five years he was once more face to face with the only person that had ever really meant anything to him made his knees weak and he sank into the solitary armchair in the cabin. When the lightheadedness passed he looked around the room, wondering how the boy that had so much promise had fallen so far. Seeing the warden was once more alert Henry Lee introduced himself, Eric wanted his lover to see through the years and recognize him so all he let himself be known as was the prison warden. Once Henry Lee motioned to the men kneeling in front of the fire Eric knew that he was safe and began to listen as Henry Lee spoke more in five mimutes than he had said for twenty-five years. Eric revelled in the sound of the voice that once had coaxed him to bed and convinced him to open his legs to accept the boy's love. Disregarding the seriousness of the situation his body responded in a way that it hadn't the opportunity since that one night. As the prisoners began reciting the worst of the abuses they had suffered in his prison Eric understood that he had not done his job in many years and was in many ways as alone in the world as Henry Lee, despite being married and having three children. For hours the warden listened to the men and when he bean to believe the stories they told walked to the cabin door and called for the helicopter pilot to join him inside. Shocked into action Eric once more took control of his employees and arranged for the men to transferred to Hickman prison until his own prison was once more safe and properly operated. It was while listening to the second call the warden made on his satellite phone that Henry Lee first heard him say his name. The lack of a physical resemblance to the boy that had shared his body and held his heart kept Henry Lee from making an immediate connection. But, hearing the name spoken by another man gave him an unexpected jolt. Waiting for clothing to be retrieved from the prison and watching the warden take charge of the men that had been tracking the prisoners listened and watched the man. It didn't take long for him to begin hearing the international inflections that he had once found so appealing in his lover and seeing many small but mermorable nuances of his movements that had been hidden by the extra two hundred pound. When Eric sat at the table to write out the orders necessary for the prisoners to be accepted at the new prison Henry Lee watched careful hoping to recognize the odd habit Eric had shown in his letters of extending the loops of his g's and y's to the next line. Only once the prisoners were out of the cabin did he take Eric by the hand and bare his soul. For the second time in their lives the men found themselves overcome with the passion that only men can know for each other. True to his word Eric had never taken another man, so he was not much of a better lover than that single night twenty-five years earlier. Neither was Henry Lee, a self-imposed virgin. But their desire to please the other allowed them moments of great tenderness and high ecstasy. Throughout the night they spoke of the love that had never died and plotted and planned a future. When the helicopter arrived to take away the orders the warden had written that night Henry Lee woke to find Eric's hand in the same place it had been the morning the President of the College had found them. They dressed to greet the pilot. On the porch Eric spoke words that Henry Lee had hoped not to hear. The only person he had ever loved was returning to his family. Eric could not abandon his sons to a life without the love of their father. Silently Henry Lee watched as the warden boarded the helicopter and flew away without ever looking back. The devastated loner turned back into is cabin without even closing the door. Henry Lee sat at the table with his back to the dying embers that had survived the freezing night looking out the door at the receding copter. An hour at a time, year by year the pain of having lost Eric poured from his eyes. The cold breeze flowing into the cabin froze the tears on his cheeks creating a human icicle joined to the table by the growing sheet of ice that built up until Henry Lee was disguised as if he hid behind a fun house mirror. Only after two months had passed was he found, frozen in the same spot where he had sat to watch his lover leave him for the future of two unknown children.