Date: Mon, 17 Sep 2018 17:14:33 -0400 From: RJ Subject: Ruby Red Chapter 3 Ruby Red by RJ This story is a simple, multi-part fiction about love between a college student and a recent post-grad. If you have any comments about my work, or even just want to chat, please don't hesitate to message me. As always, please support Nifty in any way that you can. ~ CHAPTER 3 ~ "You're kidding, right?" "Nope." I stare at him open-mouthed for a while before I laugh. "You lost your virginity when you were 12?" "Yep." "To an older man?" "Yes sir." I sit up, looking down at him as I run my fingers through my hair, thinking. "Okay, but. Who?" "He was my neighbor. Babysat me after school when my mom had to work." "That's so--" "I know, I know," RJ says quickly, patting my thigh, chuckling slightly. He stays lying down against the pillow, looking up at me. "But I wanted it. Hell, I came onto him, really." Before I can respond, he reads my expression and adds "Listen, I know it was wrong, on his end, but it happened." That wasn't all that I was going to say. Honestly, I just wanted more details before I passed judgement: what the guy was like, why and how it happened, how it has affected RJ. But it seems like he's afraid of being criticized or something to that effect, so I go for a more lighthearted approach for now and say "No wonder you're such a slut," which just makes him laugh. We've been in bed for practically the entire day, only going downstairs briefly for a quick lunch break. After we had sex this morning, we napped a bit and, when we woke up, we just talked. Picked each other's brains. I was happy to feel the depth of our conversations increasing even after this newly-established bond between us. It made our talks flow even more easily from subject to subject as we lay naked under the covers, as if we automatically became more open with each other. We discussed whatever came to mind. Religion. Politics and societal issues. Snippets about our personal lives. Of course, naturally, we eventually landed on the topic of sex. Already I've learned a ton about his sexual history, him having done plenty of things that I haven't: group sex; many instances of public sex; circle jerks; an endless amount of hookups with people over a variety of ages, occupations, and social statuses; kinky and perverted roleplays; a bit of bondage. He even dabbled in prostitution when he was a teenager. I found his repertoire intimidating, but he was quick to point out the more-or-less eight year gap between us. "Okay, well, what about you?" he asks. "How'd you lose your virginity?" "I was 15. With a kid in my grade." "So, what was that, a few months ago?" he teases, and I nudge him with my knee in response. He smiles. He gives my thigh a squeeze before rubbing it up and down. "Boyfriend?" "Kind of," I say, reminiscing a bit. "It was a secret. I was out, but he wasn't." "Have you always been out?" I almost laugh. "I mean... I've never really announced that I'm gay," I say, looking at him. I shift so that I'm lying on my stomach perpendicular to his body, lifting my legs up and relaxing as I reach out and stroke his hair. "It's always been like, if someone asks, I tell them the truth." "Mmm," he hums, closing his eyes briefly when I run my fingers through his hair over and over. "Been the same for me. I never felt the need to really, y'know, come out. I just was." "Exactly." I smile softly. "But it was always kind of obvious, I thought. I think my dad just kept a blind eye to it for a while, or however he handled it." "It's not as obvious as you think it is," he says softly. "Really?" "I mean, I knew right off the bat," he says with a smirk, and I laugh slightly. "But I have a keen eye. To everyone else, you could really pass for a slightly flamboyant straight dude. There are plenty of those." I laugh, rolling my eyes. "I'm fine, but thank you," I say, leaning forward to give him a kiss. I pull back to get back under the covers with him, both of us on our sides, facing each other. "How long have you known you were bi? Or whatever you are." He shrugs. "I guess forever." He scratches his beard lightly, thinking. "I discovered, y'know, masturbation and porn at an early age. And I liked it all. Guy-on-guy. Girl-on-guy. I wonder if that had anything to do with it?" "What about girl-on-girl?" I ask. He frowns slightly, thinking. "Y'know, actually, I never got into lesbian porn." "Thought you liked it all," I tease. "Yeah, but if there's not a guy in it, I can't really picture myself in that position," he says. I feel his hands shifting under the covers before his fingers are on my stomach. "I'm not much of a voyeur, usually." "A man of action," I say, grinning. "Mhm. I'd watch you, though," he says softly, his fingers teasing at just the base of my cock. "What would you watch me do?" I ask slyly, and he grins, but before he can respond, there's a knock on the door. "Yeah?" I call out. "It's me." I recognize Ty's voice on the other side of the door. I pull the covers over us a little more, biting my lip as I look at RJ. "Behave yourself," I whisper before glancing at the door. "Come in." The door opens and Ty steps inside, looking around before his gaze centers on the bed. Then he sees RJ, looking surprised. "Oh! Sorry, I didn't know you, uh, had company," he says with a slight smile. Ty glances at me, pointing vaguely at RJ. "Is this...?" "RJ," RJ says, sitting up and holding out his hand. I roll my eyes as the covers slip off to his lap, revealing that he's shirtless. Ty is smart enough to imply the rest. Ty slides forward, leaning over to shake RJ's hand as he sits against the headboard. "Ty." He smiles in my direction before speaking. "Well, I just wanted to ask if you were still planning on coming tonight." "Did you talk to my mom about it?" I ask. "No, why?" I wince slightly, sighing. "Okay, well, you know I love you, but some of your friends are creepy." Ty almost laughs. "What? No they're not." "Yes they are. Two of them specifically." "How?" "The super tall Texan dude grabbed my ass and told me he wanted to bend me over the pool table while his friend sneered at me. At your last little get-together." Ty stares, stoic-faced. I can tell he at least knows who the tall guy is. "Please tell me you're kidding." "I'm not." He sighs through his nose, thinking something over for a long time. "Alright, well. I'll talk to him," he says, and I bite my lip. I know what "I'll talk to him" means. Either he's going to beat the shit out of Mr. Texas, or, at the very least, it means that the Texan will unfortunately not be able to make it to the party tonight. "Will you still come?" "Can't we just do a quiet thing for your birthday? You, me, and mom?" "This wasn't planned by me," he says, holding his hands up in mock surrender. "I have to show up, and I need my two best supporters." He glances at RJ for a moment before saying "Bring RJ then if you think you'll be bored. Or preyed upon," he adds with a smirk. Not a terrible idea. I glance at RJ, who looks down at me and then shrugs. "I'm up for whatever." I smile at him before nodding at Ty. "Tonight it is, then." Ty beams. "Great. Your mom and I are gonna leave here at 7, so be ready on time for once." "Aye aye, cap'n," I say, saluting him. He just rolls his eyes and casually waves at RJ, telling him it was nice to meet him before he heads back out and shuts the door behind him. "He's hot," RJ says as soon as he's gone. I slap his side, looking up at him. "Excuse me?" "What? He's hot. And your mom is hot. You all are hot." I blush, rolling my eyes. "Can you not?" He laughs, sliding back down with me. "What's with all his face tattoos?" I shrug. "A couple are from when he used to be in a gang. And then some are from prison." "Well damn, now he's even hotter," RJ says after a pause, grinning. "God, I fucking hate you." "You don't think he's hot?" "How about we not talk about this." I pinch his nipple playfully and he winces, covering it with his hand immediately. But he continues teasing. "You think he's hot, don't you? Do you call him daddy too?" I burst out laughing before I push him away, turning around. "I'm never calling you that again." "Don't make threats you can't keep," he says in my ear, sliding closer and pressing up against me. His arm slides around me snugly as he kisses my neck. I smile. "Actually, that gives me an idea." I reach forward, leaning out of his grip for a moment to grab my phone off the nightstand. I show him what I'm doing as I go to my contacts and click on his name, changing it from "RJ" to "Daddy" and adding a few stupid, extremely gay emojis. "Now will you leave me alone?" I ask, looking at him. He laughs, rolling his eyes. "You're lucky you're cute," he says, grabbing my chin and tilting my head more towards him as he leans down and kisses me. RJ goes back to his apartment for a few hours to shower and get changed, and also to give me some time to finish the homework that I never did last night. I get as much as I can done by the time 7 rolls around, quickly showering and getting dressed in something simple. When I make it downstairs, RJ's already here, talking with Ty and my mom. He smiles when he sees me, accepting my hug with a firm embrace. Ty makes a sly comment, saying how they're always waiting on me, and I just flip him off as I take RJ's hand and lead him to the car. It's not that long of a ride to one of the local bars -- a slightly dingy place with some questionable-looking characters, but most of them are pretty nice. I always get offered a drink since I've been dubbed Ty's boy, and of course, since it's Ty's birthday party, I get extra-special treatment. But tonight I pass, focusing on RJ, keeping him close to me at all times. We spend most of the time keeping to ourselves, playing pool together and chatting and trying to guess what crimes each person here has served time for. After a while, a heavily-tattooed straight couple come up to our table. I recognize the guy but cannot for the life of me place his name. "Hey, buddy!" he says. Clearly he knows me. "Darlin', this is Jake, Ty's kid. Or step-kid. Or... how does it work?" "Legally, it doesn't," I say with a smile, and it makes them both laugh. I shake her hand as she introduces herself as Debbie. "And this," the man says, pointing towards RJ, "is Jake's boyfriend. RJ, right?" I look between them with my eyes wide. "Uh..." I feel like I'm caught in a cross-fire, unsure which direction to go. The man seems to catch on to the possibility that he might have said something semi-out of bounds. "Did I get that wrong? Ty mentioned--" But RJ swoops in next to me, a hand on my back. "Nah, you got it right. Nice to meet you," he says, shaking each of their hands. Debbie and her man ask if they could play a round, since we've been playing a while, and RJ says he doesn't mind at all, quickly offering up the space. We walk away from the table and head towards the bar. RJ orders a drink for himself. "Sorry about that," I say softly, sitting on the bar stool against the wall. He remains standing next to me, between my legs and the adjacent chair. He looks at me. "Why are you sorry?" "Just... Well, it was awkward, I guess." He grins slightly. "Are you embarrassed of me?" "What?" I laugh. "Quite the fucking opposite, actually." I tug on his shirt lightly. He chuckles, his hand on my lower back again. "I know we didn't necessarily talk about it," he says, tipping the bartender for the whiskey she just placed in front of him. "I just figured it'd be easier to go along with them." I nod a bit, watching him take a large sip. "Right." He licks his lips and winces slightly as he swallows before clearing his throat and looking at me. "I don't mind being your boyfriend, y'know," he says. "If that's what you want. I don't care what we call it. I'll be whatever you want me to be." "Nice and simple, huh?" I say with a smile. "I told you I'm very easy-going." I scoff. "Or just easy," I tease, and he pretends to look offended. I laugh, poking his chest. "Come here." He grins and leans down to kiss me at my request, and I hum for a moment before pulling back and licking my lips. "Fuck, whiskey is gross." He laughs. "You'll have to get used to it, kid." "I'll try," I say, stopping his drink from reaching his lips. I kiss him again, and he kisses back, our lips smacking a little louder than usual, which just makes me giggle a bit. RJ grins loosely against my lips. "God, I love kissing you." I reply with a few more kisses. We're slightly out of the way, where most of the crowd won't see us canoodling. For the most part, all they'd really see is RJ's back. We make out slowly, the kisses deepening slightly. RJ's hand slides down into my jeans, right into my underwear, grabbing my ass. I moan slightly, clutching onto his belt to hold onto something. Then I squeal against his lips, feeling his fingers teasing my hole. "Stop, you're gonna get me in trouble," I say, my face warm. "No I won't," he says, his fingers moving in circles. I can feel an erection coming. "I hate you," I breathe out, looking around. I whine slightly, trying to resist grinding against him before I push his face away with my hand. He stumbles slightly, pulling his hand away from my ass, and I take a breath as he laughs. "I could smack you right now," I say, adjusting my shirt. He simply sits on the stool next to me, facing me. "Do it." I can't tell his expression, nor properly place his tone, so I raise my eyebrows a bit and stare for a few moments. "Why do I feel like you actually want me to?" He grins slightly, shrugging as he takes a sip of his drink. "I mean, as long as you don't knock me out or anything," he says with a laugh. "A nice, sexy bit of slapping." "Seriously?" I laugh. "You like getting hit?" "Sure. Sometimes I like getting a little, uh, roughed up," he says, his other hand sliding up and down my thigh. I bite my lip a bit, picturing all the things I could be doing to him right now. "I knew you were secretly submissive." He laughs, shaking his head. "It's no secret," he says. "And it's no secret that I like both. I mean, really... How much fun can you really have if you don't play on both sides of the spectrum?" Before I can inquire further, my mom comes up behind RJ, making a relieved sort of sound at finding me. "I need you to do me a favor," she says, rummaging through her purse for money, looking mildly flustered. "What favor?" "Janet is a fucking idiot and never picked up the cake like she promised," she says, rolling her eyes and swearing as she tries to count her bills. I laugh. "Where from?" "Claire's, on Elm." "Is it under his name?" "Yeah." I watch her struggle looking for more money for half a minute before I stop her, standing up. "I'll just pay for it, mom, it's no big deal." "Really?" She looks instantly relieved, leaning in and kissing my cheek before she hands me her car keys. "Thank you so much. I'd get it myself but Ty doesn't want me to leave him alone." "Not a problem." I smile, taking the keys and glancing at RJ. "Up for a drive?" We head out of the bar and I sigh, breathing in the fresh, almost-nighttime air. The sun is setting, so it's still decently light out as we cross the parking lot to get to my mom's car. But as we walk, I'm thinking about what RJ said. I remember when I was riding him this morning. I could see it then, the submissive part of him coming out. Frankly, thinking about it is only turning me on. My big, strong man, giving up control. "Hey, wait," I say as he's about to hop into the passenger seat. He looks at me with an inquisitive expression before I come up to him and push him hard against the car, the door shutting. "What the--?" And then I kiss him, giving him no time to recover. I kiss him hard, wildly, passionately. I grip his body tight to mine, and after a moment, he kisses me back with equal ferocity, clutching onto me tightly, his fingers digging into my back a bit when he tugs on my shirt. I push back against him and take a breath, pausing for a moment before I look up at him, giving as steely a glance as I can muster. "Get down," I say, and he looks at me for a moment before the slightest grin appears on his lips. He quickly obliges, getting to his knees as he slides his jacket off and tosses it to the ground. At first, I'm surprised he didn't question me, didn't wonder "Right here? Are you sure?" But then I remember his general taste for adventure. This is up his alley. For me, it's new. My heart's racing as I open the passenger side door to mostly block the bar's view of us. I feel him messing with my belt and fly and by the time I look down, he already has my cock out in the open air, nearly fully hard. He licks his lips, wasting no time getting to work. I moan, holding onto his head as he works his magic, alternating speed and depth and then easily taking me all the way. I feel like I'm already working up a sweat as he blows me. I pull on his hair, tugging him away from my cock sharply, a thick string of spit connecting my lips to his head. "You look so fucking hot right now," I say, slapping his face with my wet cock. I rub it along his facial features and he closes his eyes, letting out a little moan. I watch him hurry to undo his own belt and fly and pull out his cock, jerking himself off. "Look at me, Rueben," I say, and he does, opening his eyes and staring right up at me, his face flushed, already panting against my cock. I run my dick against his lips slowly and then bite my lip. He asked for this, right? I slap his face with my palm. Not too hard, but hard enough to get the point across. He doesn't make much of a sound -- just grunts slightly and then looks right back up at me, jerking himself off even faster. I run my fingers over his lips now, sliding my index and middle finger and having him suck slowly on them before I remove them and quickly slap him again. This time, it's a little harder, and he moans out before looking back up at me. I consider asking if this is okay. Maybe we should have thought of a safe word or something. But I'm sure he would have stopped me by now, right? And then, before I think of what to do, he whispers "Again." I grin slightly, stroking his cheek and then giving him another decent slap before I grab my cock and slip it into his open mouth. He takes it, only choking once in surprise before he finds a rhythm. I hold the back of his head, fucking his mouth at a steady pace, listening to his moans and those lewd wet noises. I pull my dick away sharply with a loud pop. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, breathless. "Fuck," he whispers, licking his lips. I turn around, slipping my pants enough to reveal my ass. I hear him say "Oh fuck yes" before he grasps my hips and pulls me into him, eating me out intently. I push his hands away, making him just use his mouth. I grind against his tongue, moaning out, steadying myself on the door a bit as I stroke myself. Eventually I reach back, gripping his hair and pulling him deeper into me. Between my legs, I can see his hand working up and down his cock at a quick pace. I make sure he eats me out for a decent amount of time, and make sure he does it well, getting me nice and wet. Because when he does, I have him stand up. I guide him to the back of the car, having him lie down across the back seat. I quickly straddle him, my back facing him, spitting copious amounts of spit into my palm and onto his cock before I lean back, hold him up, and sink down onto him. I wince. Maybe I should take this slower. There's no lube after all, and even though spit seems to be working fine, I still need to adjust. But at the same time, I'm too turned on to care. I want to show him what I'm capable of. I arch my back a bit so my ass sticks out nicely for him, because I know he's watching. I know he's watching his cock disappear between my cheeks every time I go back down. I feel his hands on my ass, gripping and pulling and giving it a smack every now and then. I moan out, pushing up on the car ceiling as I grind down into him to get nice and deep. Soon, I feel his hand run up my back and then around the front of my neck before pulling me down against him. I moan out, feeling him shift a bit, probably to get his feet into a sturdy position because within seconds, he starts thrusting up into me. I hover my ass a bit, moaning out, definitely working up a sweat by now. I feel it sticking to my shirt. I get a little nervous too. I can no longer see if anyone's coming, or is at least within earshot. It makes me anxious, but it's an anxiety that is accompanied by excitement. Thrill. We could totally get caught right now. Someone could walk by, peek over the adjacent car, and see RJ sliding his hand from my neck down to between my legs, gripping my cock, jacking me off as he fucks me. They'd see me moaning, clenching my eyes closed and teeth shut, bucking my hips a bit. They'd see me shoot my fourth load of the day, all over the front of my shirt. I relax a bit after my orgasm since RJ stops thrusting, and I need a longer time to recover. It's hot in the car, and my cock is absolutely spent. RJ keeps stroking me lightly, kissing my neck softly before he lets go. I take a deep breath and let it out slowly through my nose. "Did you finish?" I ask. "No," he says, chuckling a bit. I groan. "I have absolutely no energy for you," I say, tilting my head to look at him. "You're gonna have to do all the work." I pat his cheek. He smirks slightly, letting out the smallest chuckle before shifting. He pulls out and then slides out from under me. In an awkward shift of positions and disentanglement of our limbs, followed by a few laughs, he finally gets on top of me. I stay lying down against the backseat as he wraps one of my legs around him, holding the back of my thigh as his cock rubs against my crotch. Using the cum that's still on my dick and all between his fingers, he lubes himself up a bit before sliding slowly into me. I whimper, gasping slightly as he fills me, clutching onto his shirt with a tight fist. "Your shirt is a mess, by the way," RJ says with a laugh as he starts to thrust. "Your fucking fault," I spit back, grunting and moaning softly. I reach back and grab his ass with one hand, digging my fingers into it, and he bites his lip in response. We lock eyes for a bit before he leans down and kisses me hard, working his hips at a moderate pace and matching the tempo with his mouth. I kiss him back eagerly, sliding my hands up the back of his shirt and scratching his back. He moans against my mouth, getting louder and louder until finally, he makes his cute orgasm moans that I've grown so fond of already. He gives me sharp thrusts as he cums inside of me, inhaling sharply through his teeth before finally relaxing, expelling a deep breath. After a long pause, I speak up. "I'm a little upset." He looks at me. "What? Why?" "Because. I wanted you to cum in my mouth," I say, smirking a bit. He grins. "Really?" He licks his lips, looking at mine before his eyes flick back up to my eyes. "Sorry. There's always next time," he says before kissing me gently twice. He slowly pulls out of me with a moan and then starts to slide out of the car, standing up with his jeans still at his thighs and his cock hanging semi-hard between his legs. A long drop of cum hangs from the tip as he pulls up his jeans, his cock just sticking out from the open fly. Before he can put it away, I sit up, lean forward, grasp his cock, and lap up the cum. I suck on the tip once before looking up at him, enjoying the intrigued look he's giving me. "I hope you're satisfied after all that," I say, tucking his cock into his underwear for him. "Because I need a break. I'm officially in recovery." He laughs, helping me to my feet. "You started this." My legs are sore and I stumble for a moment, but he holds me up and then helps me with my pants. He squats down before sliding them up, not missing an opportunity to grope my ass as he pulls my pants over it. "Was I okay?" I ask. The question slips out before I can stop myself. He arches his eyebrow. "Were you okay?" He looks down as he adjusts my cock in my briefs for me and then buttons my jeans. "I don't think you realize what a hot little fucker you are," he says as he fastens my belt and then zips up my fly. I smile. "Sorry. I swear I'm not needy, I just... wanted to try something new." "I'm glad you did. I'm totally going on record and saying that was probably the hottest public sex I've ever had," he says, tugging at the hem of my shirt. I laugh. "Probably?" "Top three," he says, grinning at me before stepping back and adjusting his own shirt. "Do I look like I just had rough sex in the back of your mom's car?" "Kinda," I say, reaching up to fix his hair. "You look sleepy." "I am," he says, sneaking in a quick kiss as I pull away. "Your shirt is a bit of a statement, though," he says, chuckling as he leans down to pick up his jacket. "Here." He helps me into it, before zipping it up in the front. "Won't I look dumb with this zipped-up?" "Gotta hide the evidence," he says before looking around the parking lot. It's gotten a bit darker since we came out here. "We should go get that cake." "Fuck!" I had totally forgotten about the cake. I wonder how long we've been out here. Hopefully not too long. "Get in," I say, pushing him into the passenger side, and he merely laughs as I make him hurry. Twenty minutes later, we make it back to the bar with the cake in hand. I wanted to look as inconspicuous as possible but as soon as we walk in, someone shouts "Hey, the cake's finally here!" and a bunch of people cheer, looking in our direction. I roll my eyes and hear RJ laughing slightly beside me as we look around. Then, Ty and my mom come up to us. "Where were you guys?" he asks, beer in hand. "You missed my birthday toast. I said such nice things about you, you would have cried," he adds, poking my chest, and I laugh. "We had to get the cake," I say, gesturing to the giant rectangle cake in RJ's arms. "Carrot cake, just how you like it." "Oh hell yeah," he says, standing in front of RJ and peering into the box for a moment before beckoning him to one of the tables. "Come on, set it down over here," he says, and I watch Ty and RJ head towards the opposite side of the bar. My mom nudges me. "So is there a reason it took you guys so long?" I bite my lip, shrugging. "You know how traffic can be. And the cake wasn't even ready by the time we got there." She looks at me, arching her eyebrow. "Uh huh." She grins slightly, tousling my hair before heading over to join Ty in cutting the cake. I lean against the nearby pool table and just observe. I watch RJ set the box down and open it up in a dramatically slow fashion before people crowd around the cake, snapping pictures of it. It is a pretty well-made cake after all, with intricate patterning and the like. Ty likes that kind of stuff. I chuckle to myself as pieces of the cake start getting passed out before I notice RJ slip out of the crowd, walking towards me. "Hiding?" he says, grinning. "Not very well." He has a small plate and a piece of cake in his hand, and he holds it up as he gets closer. "Got you a slice." "I think I'm okay," I say, smiling but declining. "Good, because it's really for me." He smirks and leans against the table next to me, taking a bite as we observe the cheery crowd in silence. "You alright?" he asks after a bit. I look up at him. "Yeah, why?" "I don't know, you just look super pensive." I nod, smiling. "Strangely, I feel incredibly calm." Then I laugh slightly. "Maybe I'm just tired." He rubs my back affectionately. "We can get out of here soon, if you want." "I'd like that," I say, leaning against his shoulder a bit. He kisses the top of my head before finishing off his cake, and I close my eyes as I rest against him, just listening to the bustle of the party, feeling completely at ease with him. That easiness stays with us. Our relationship develops so organically over the next month that for the most part, we just follow the flow, taking everything as it comes and relishing in every moment. We never really discuss what we are, and never sit down to hash out what the rules are. Somehow, it's worked for us, simply by reading and responding to each other. For all intents and purposes, when other people ask, we just say we're together, but I think that fits well with us. Because both of us don't want to pressure the other into something so defined. After all, we're both still raw from the strictness of our past relationships. Often, I think back on my relationship with Toby. What a strange guy he is. The tall, handsome, clean-cut, "normal"-looking guy that's a bit fucked up on the inside. The thing is, I never really figured out if he was intentionally terrible to me. It was nearly a year of him challenging every decision I made, sometimes just for the sake of conflict. Making me feel inferior. Always needing to know exactly where I am but never reciprocating and telling me what he's doing. Calling me ugly. Hitting me when he was drunk and then apologizing profusely the next morning, going on and on about how much he adored me. Everyone loved Toby except my strangely-perceptive mom. With RJ, everything is different. We are equals. He is kind and patient and doting. We give each other space when we need it. He's empathetic and understanding. The opposite of Toby. And I know it's still early, but sometimes you just know about a person. Maybe it's the ease of it all, even as our lives become a little more integrated. We fall into a flexible pattern of seeing each other, get along famously with each other's friends and family, always keep each other in mind when we want to either travel or lounge around all day or just need someone around. It's all easy and simple. Sometimes I worry that it's too good to be true, so I always be sure to catch myself. And I always remember, it should be easy. My first relationship was hard. Terribly hard. Now it serves as a lesson. I don't hold back, but I remain careful. Open, but aware. I still get little flutters of excitement in my chest when I see him. Mostly because he tends to surprise me. I'm in the studio, sketching with a few of my classmates, Khadija included. We chat and draw, most of us trying to catch up on all the work we're behind on. In the middle of laughing at one Khadija's jokes, I feel hands on my sides. I gasp before I recognize that grip. It's surely RJ's. I tilt my head back and look up at him upside down, smiling widely. "You fucker," I say, laughing. He grins. "How about a hello?" He leans down and kisses me softly before pulling away. He says hi to Khadija as well, giving her a side hug and kissing her cheek before he grabs a chair. "What are you doing here?" "Do I need a reason to see you?" he asks, pouting playfully as he slides a chair over to my station and sits next to me. I tap his lip with my pen, smiling. "No, but I'm sure you have one." He laughs. "I had to drop my sister off at her lessons, which is right around the corner," he says, putting an arm around me. "Plus, my phone is dead, and Mom invited us to dinner. So here I am, extending a formal invitation." I smile. His mom is the ultimate mom – a short lady, slightly overweight, brilliant chef, radiant energy, constantly doting and fussing over her children. She's absolutely adorable. And RJ's evident love for her is extremely attractive to me. She, as well as RJ's little sisters, all welcomed me with exceedingly open arms when I met them. Already, they make me feel like family. "What time?" He checks his watch. "'Bout an hour," he says, looking back up at me. "Working on anything interesting?" His eyes flicker over to some of my half-finished sketches. "Not really. Been lacking inspiration lately," I say, shuffling through some of the pages. They're all rough drafts of the human form, but nothing really fleshed out. And the deadline is coming up. "You can't draw a man's body by now?" he asks with a grin. "I'm offended." I almost laugh, but then think of what he's implying. I should be able to draw at least RJ's body from memory. And I probably could, but if he's here... "Wait," I say, pausing and then looking at RJ. He looks at me all confused-like as my mouth splits into a grin. "Go stand over there." Who better to inspire me than him? I point to the empty space across my station, biting my lip. He half-smirks. "Seriously?" "Please? It'll only take a few minutes." He sighs through his nose and says "Fine," standing up and walking over. I check him out a bit. He's wearing a crewneck, shorts, and boots -- an outfit I find strangely sexy. He turns to face me, crossing his arms. "What am I supposed to do?" "Just stand there and look cute," I say, biting my lip as I tear off a fresh piece of paper and do a rough outline. As I start with his silhouette, I say "Take off your shirt." He looks around. There are half a dozen other students in here, mostly quiet as they work on their own projects. But a couple of them are peering over at us. "For why?" "I need your body, and your shirt is too thick." He rolls his eyes, grabbing the hem of his crewneck and slipping it over his head with one fluid motion. Khadija whistles, making all of us laugh and RJ blush. "How `bout the shorts next?" someone calls out. "Relax, ladies," I say, trying not to laugh as I sketch RJ's upper body. I don't like how it looks when he's standing, so I have him sit on a nearby stool and pose a bit. I even stand up and go over to him, moving his limbs around until I get him to hold something I like. "That's almost perfect," I say softly, chewing on the end of my pen before I shrug. "But they're right. The shorts gotta go," I say in a playful tone, trying not to smirk. A couple of the girls squeal in laughter. RJ stares up at me a bit, his face a little red still. But then he stands up, looking down at me with an almost challenging stare. "You really wanna do this?" I just arch my eyebrow in response, grinning. "Fine," he says, undoing his belt as he stares at me. Then he drops his shorts and I hear a few girls gasp and laugh, Khadija whispering "Oh my god" before I look down and realize RJ's naked. He's not wearing underwear today. I look back up. "Uh... You..." RJ just shrugs, kicking off his boots and socks and shorts before sitting completely naked on the stool. He gets back into the previous pose, looking at me. "How's this?" he says. The way he's looking at me feels like a bit of foreplay. Power play, even. We're both trying to prove something to each other, or maybe one-up the other. How, I'm not entirely sure, but that's just how it feels. It's enough to make my cock stir slightly in my own shorts. I nod, swallowing thickly and ignoring the girls as I get back to my station and sketch. It really is perfect. His pose, his musculature, the sexy way he's staring at me, almost glaring. The nudity helps with the rawness of the sketch and by the time I'm finished, I have my first sketch finished and the rest of the project planned out. "Okay, perfect," I say, setting my pen down and stretching my fingers. I smile at RJ. "Thanks, babe." He stands up, and of course I can't help but watch his cock, even heavy-looking while soft, swing as he grabs his shirt first, pulling it on, taking his time. And then he pulls on his shorts. He leaves them undone as he puts his shoes on, his luscious pubes still on display. I try to ignore the girls as I pack up my things, and by the time I'm finished, RJ is dressed and ready to go. "Hope you enjoyed the show, ladies," I say to them. I hug Khadija goodbye and wave to the rest of them as we leave, and they all laugh and say bye to both of us. "You were getting cheeky in there, big guy," I say as we walk to his car. "You were asking for it, little boy," he teases, pushing me playfully before quickly grabbing my shirt and pulling me into him. He leans down and kisses me before we continue walking. "My intention wasn't to show you off," I say. "Uh huh," he says disbelievingly with a laugh. "You used me." "Okay, maybe a little, but you saw how they reacted." "More like heard," he says. "I try not to look at them." "They're not your type?" I tease. "No, it's because they always look at me weird." "Huh?" "Your art friends. Except for Khadija, really, she's the only normal one." "Well they're just a bunch of horny, pretentious art students," I say, patting his butt. "You inspire lust." "Ha ha," he says. I just smile, taking RJ's hand. "I think you made Khadija's day." He glances at me. "Why?" I chuckle. "She's been dying to see what all the fuss is about." "What fuss?" he asks before adding, "You tell her about us?" I look up, blushing slightly. "Sorry." He just rolls his eyes and grins. "Even I don't kiss and tell." "Sometimes I just need something to brag about," I say, giving his ass a slap. We banter all the way to his mom's house, arriving just as she's finishing up cooking dinner. I'm totally distracted by all the delicious smells as we enter the kitchen before I hear a little motherly squeal and see her bustle towards her son. She smiles broadly at the sight of RJ, kissing both his cheeks after he hugs her. Then she pushes him aside playfully to get to me, and I laugh, sinking into her warm embrace. "I'm so happy you two could come tonight." "Of course, Ma," RJ says, about to steal a sliver of garlic bread off the rack before she slaps his hand. "You wait like everybody else," she says sternly, and I chuckle as RJ rubs his wrist. "Careful, she hits hard," he says with a laugh, reaching up to grab plates and glasses to set the table. I help with the silverware and any food she wants to bring to the table with us. I look at the spread: homemade garlic bread and a veggie/mashed potato casserole of sorts. RJ's mom's specialty. It smells absolutely divine. "It's just us tonight, by the way," she says. She mentions that both of RJ's sisters won't be home in time for dinner, which RJ seems a little upset about but quickly perks up at the sight of the food. "Better dig in then," he says, licking his lips as he sits down. I offer to get everyone drinks before I take my seat. We fill up our plates and start eating, RJ's mom immediately striking up a conversation about the local politics. I don't know much about what's going on in local government, so I only chime in when called upon, and keep it vague as to not sound stupid. Not that she has ever made me feel that way. But eventually, the topic switches when RJ's mom asks "So, honey, what are you going to do for your birthday?" I look at RJ curiously as he speaks. "You know, I've been thinking. Grandma's been bugging me to come up, so I've been toying with the idea of driving up maybe Friday and staying into Saturday or something. Or maybe I'll even leave tomorrow." "Can you take off a day from work?" "I have Friday off already so it wouldn't be a problem." "A wonderful idea, then. The more time you can spare her, the better," she says, nodding in agreement as she sips her water. "She misses you." "I miss her too," he says, smiling. "Wait wait," I say, and they both look over at me. "When's your birthday?" RJ bites his lip. "Saturday." "That's in three days!" I look at him, surprised. "Why didn't you tell me?" "I really don't care about my birthday, babe," he says with a shrug. Before I respond, his mother chimes in. "It's true. Hasn't since he was little," she says, reaching over and rubbing RJ's hand. "Though I suppose it's because you had to grow up fast." "But, aren't you going to do something?" I ask. He shrugs. "Yeah, I mean. I'll probably come back Saturday afternoon. Maybe we could get dinner or something?" he asks his mom, and she smiles, nodding and saying that she'll tell the girls. "And I'm fully willing to bet my life savings that Stevie has something stupid planned that night," he adds, looking at me. "And I'll need you for that." I laugh a little, though I was hoping for more alone time. Already, I'm planning something in my head. "Alright," I say softly. We finish up dinner and help with dishes before saying goodnight to his mom and heading out. RJ drives me to my house and stops outside, looking at me. I don't take off my seatbelt just yet. "So you're thinking of leaving tomorrow?" I ask. "Yeah," he says. "Sorry if it seems last minute, I only just got the idea today, when she called this morning." "How far away is it?" He shrugs. "About a three hour drive, upstate." "Damn." I bite my lip a bit, looking at him. This would be the first time that we've been separated a bit, and it does make me a little sad -- but I think it's because I want to spend some of his birthday with him. Maybe it's selfish of me, but even if he doesn't think it's a special day, it's still special to me. "Well, I'll miss you, that's for sure." He grins. "You gonna survive the next few days without me?" "Barely," I say, laughing. He looks at me for a while, clearly thinking something over before he speaks. "Well, in the interest of survival, why don't you at least stay over tonight?" I perk up a bit. "Yeah?" "Yeah. Go grab anything you'll need and then we'll go back to my place. We can relax in bed. Watch a movie." "How about a massage?" I tease, stepping out of the car. "Baby, I'll massage you wherever you want," he says, looking me up and down with a slight grin, reaching out to grab me. I laugh and shut the door before he can, hurrying up to my house. I pack some overnight things along with clothes for tomorrow and any books that I'll need for class. When I get back to the car, it's a quick drive to RJ's apartment. We say hi to Stevie, who's in the living room with two other friends, but we pay little attention to them. Instead, we head straight to RJ's room. He shuts the door behind us, sighing and stretching a bit. I put my things in a collective pile before kicking my shoes off and hopping on the bed. I pat the spot next to me. "C'mere." He laughs. "Gimme a minute, I just wanna get some clothes together," he says, heading to his closet. "You know my grandma only approves of button-ups?" he says. "Really?" "Yup. Button-ups and fucking khakis. Ten extra points if you wear a whole ass suit." He pulls out a snazzy three-piece from his closet, a tie draped over it. I look at him, open-mouthed. "Put it on," I say. "Right now?" "Yes. I've never seen you in a suit." "So?" "So?" I rest on my side. "What's sexier than a man in a suit?" He laughs. "More like what's more uncomfortable than a man in a suit?" "Just put it on," I say, biting my lip. "Please?" He sighs, hanging it on the doorknob before taking off his crewneck. "The things I do for you," he says, tossing his shirt at my face. I laugh a bit before I hold onto it, feeling its warmth. Wanting to put it on, I swap my shirt for this crewneck. It feels soft on my skin, and cozy from his body heat. When I look back up, he's down to his underwear, sliding on the button-up first. He glances at me, grinning. "Cute shirt." "Thanks, it's new," I say, showing it off with a laugh. "Not gonna lie, it kinda turns me on when you wear my clothes," he says, finishing with the buttons and pulling on the slacks. "Yeah?" I grin a bit, taking off my shorts as well so that his crewneck and my underwear are all that I'm wearing. Even though the shirt is too big on me, I feel a little sexy myself. I watch him dress himself still, tucking in the button-up and then throwing on the jacket. My mouth waters a bit as he smooths himself out. It's a stylish, dark, well-tailored suit, simple-looking from far away, but the super-thin pinstripes along the jacket and trousers glimmer slightly if they hit the light just right. The lighter shirt underneath pops nicely, making him look sophisticated with a hint of edgy. Fuck, he looks so sexy. "You forgot the tie," I say, gesturing towards it on the floor. "Ah, shit," he says, bending over to pick it up. "Here," I say, beckoning him over. I sit up on the edge of the bed on my knees, taking the tie from him and putting it on him, fully aware of his intent gaze. I take my time with the tie, wanting to do it right the first time, and when I finish, he looks perfect. I run my hands down his torso from inside the jacket, biting my lip. "I'd make you wear a suit 24/7 if I could." He laughs. "Would you now?" "I'm dead fucking serious," I say softly. "My loins are literally on fire." This only makes him laugh harder before he steps a little closer, kissing me gently as his hand creeps up the inside of my leg and rubs against my crotch. "Oh shit," he says, groping me and chuckling, feeling how hard and warm I am. "You weren't kidding." "I told you." I grab onto his tie and kiss him more. We start off slow, very slow. I think initially we were just going to kiss and tease each other and let that be that. But then gradually, with more wandering hands and firm grips, the passion increases. We get a little more grabby with each other, and the moans start to get a little more insistent. Soon, his hand slips up the crewneck and then into my briefs, fondling my cock and making me moan. I swear softly against his lips. I swallow thickly as he pulls away, hooking his hands into my underwear and sliding them down my thighs. Then he pushes me back onto the bed, looming over me with a slight grin before he leans down to pull off my underwear completely. I can sense the dominant side of him tonight. He stands, rubbing his crotch slightly, and I can see him feel out the length of his cock through the thin trousers. He beckons me over to his groin with his finger, and I oblige, biting my lip. I kneel in front of him, looking up as he unzips his fly. As he reaches inside, I swallow again, looking down and watching him slowly pull out his cock. I automatically lean forward to take him into my mouth but he stops me, his hand on my forehead. "Easy, tiger." He strokes himself slowly in front of me and I know he's just teasing me, tempting me, and it's working. I keep having to swallow the spit that accumulates in my mouth, staring transfixed at his cock before finally, he brings me forward. He slides deep into my mouth, right into my throat, and I choke but hold steady, moaning around his manhood. He holds my head still as he thrusts back and forth in slow, long strides. I feel his hand on my back, bunching up my shirt in a fist and pulling it up a bit so that my ass is on display for him. I picture him grinning as he leans over and gives my ass a solid slap before grabbing it. He lifts one foot onto his bed and then starts fucking my face a little faster, whispering "That's a good boy" as he does. I steady my breathing as best as I can, my face surely flushed, often gagging slightly on his cock. Eventually he stands up straight again, and pulls back enough for his cock to slip from my lips, and I pant, looking up at him. He takes off his jacket and loosens his tie a bit before nodding slightly, giving me the go-ahead. As he rolls up his sleeves and starts unbuttoning his shirt, I reach out and lift his cock to my mouth with my palm and then work him over at my own pace. I reach into his slacks, groping around for his balls until I can get them through the fly and out in the open air. I be sure to give them some attention, kissing down his wet cock and lapping at his balls with relish, taking in his scent. I moan, sticking my tongue out and letting it slide all the way up his shaft until I can suckle on the tip. He pulls away, and I realize his shirt is fully open before he leans down and kisses me, my face cupped by his hands. He guides me back up to my knees while slowly making out with me, offering lots of slow but deliberate tongue, and I go wherever his hands tell me to go. He puts his hands on my upper arms and turns me around, wasting no time in pushing me back down on the bed and then lifting my ass up in the air. The crewneck slides off my hips a bit, my ass in perfect view. "Fuck," he whispers, running his hands slowly over each cheek, his thumb gently grazing over my hole and causing me to moan. I hear his pants slide down his legs and he shifts a bit. I look back, and see he's only wearing the unbuttoned shirt and tie, totally focused on my ass as he strokes himself. "Reach back and stroke your pussy, baby," he says, and I do so, reaching up between my legs to paw at my hole slowly. I moan, both for him and myself because I can't help it. I feel him spit down onto my fingers as I rub, which makes it nice and slick. I tease myself gently for a few minutes before he says "One finger." Moaning softly, I push my middle finger past the ring, making my hole pucker a bit as I penetrate myself. I don't see the slap coming, so I cry out in surprise and pleasure when he spanks me. I hear him shift again and then feel something warm and wet on my balls, followed by the scratchiness of his facial hair. His tongue surprises me, sliding smoothly over my balls and taint and up to my hole. Wanting to give him better access, I move my finger away as he eats me out, kissing lewdly on my hole. It doesn't last too long though. This whole time, he's been slowly stroking himself, and finally, he's close. He pats my ass and I look back at him standing up. He snaps his fingers and points to the floor, and I take that as the signal to get on my knees. I do so quickly, sitting on my heels and looking up at him expectantly. His fingers comb through my hair before holding as he strokes himself faster and faster until he grunts and gasps. I open my mouth, and most of his load hits my tongue, but I have to close my eyes from the warm ropes that splatter across my face. He lets out a long sigh, humming deeply before I swallow and then take the head in my mouth, sucking softly. He chuckles a bit, watching me as I get the last few drops out. "You're beautiful," he says, and I don't expect him to make that comment. I feel my face warm up even more, and I laugh softly. "Shut up." He grins and pulls me up to my feet, kissing me once before he laps up all the cum off of my face. "All clean," he says with a grin, but I just whimper slightly, my cock throbbing. "God, you make me feel so needy." He laughs. "What else do you need, baby?" I arch my eyebrows a bit before I glance down between us, my cock as solid as stone. His hands follow my eyes, sliding down to grip me very tightly. I stand on my toes, gasping. "You're so fucking hard," he says. "Fix it," I say, whimpering slightly in his grip before he lets go. He grabs the hem of my shirt and starts tugging up while saying "You're gonna fuck me." I look at him once the shirt is off. "I am?" He tosses it to the floor, licking his lips. "You are." He swiftly drops to his knees and takes me into his mouth, holding my hips as he rocks his head up and down my length. I moan out, swearing, and then he hums in surprise before popping off of my cock, looking up at me. "Actually, idea," he says, swallowing spit. "If you don't make a sound for the next, say, five minutes, you can fuck me." I blink. "What happened to `You're gonna fuck me,' huh?" I ask. He shrugs, smiling, stroking me lightly. "C'mon, it'll be fun." He kisses my thigh. "I just wanna test your limits." "Five minutes is a long fucking time, dude." "Alright, alright. Three?" He grabs my phone from out of my shorts pocket and hands it to me. "Time it." I bite my lip a bit, thinking it over before nodding and opening the stopwatch. He grins widely and I take a huge breath, trying to compose myself. I almost fuck it up right at the beginning, because he swallows me entirely, totally showing off. I stop myself from moaning though and just breathe deeply as he works over my cock, using lots of throat and teasing my balls with his fingers. He does this thing where he deep-throats me and then opens his mouth, extending his tongue so that he's lapping at my balls at the same time. I nearly cum right there, on the very fucking edge, but I hold back. Unfortunately, I can't hold back my moan. Most of it is stifled but a whimper still escapes. He looks up at me and then slides smoothly off and licking his lips. "I think I won," he says. I check the timer. 2 minutes and 42 seconds. "Fucking hell." He laughs and stands up, kissing me deeply. "You can fuck me anyway," he mutters against my lips, and I almost miss it. But he gives me a look and I know that's what he wants. I grin slightly before starting to pull off his shirt, and then I decide against it. "You know what? Leave the shirt on. And the tie." I lick my lips a bit, running my hands over his torso before going around him and pushing him onto the bed. He chuckles a bit, getting in the center of the bed on his stomach, looking back at me. He wiggles his ass playfully and I bite my lip. "Eat up," he says, grinning. I grab the lube from his nightstand and then climb onto the bed, getting behind him. I run my hands over his cheeks, spreading them, getting a beautiful glimpse of his pink little hole and the little bit of hair around it. I tease his hole, just barely touching it, practically tickling him with my index finger, and he moans, lifting himself up. "Now you be quiet," I say, leaning down to bite one of his cheeks. I kiss slowly inward, getting closer to his hole, but I pull away at the last second, doing little more than blowing on his hole and grinning at the whiny sound he makes. I pop the cap on the lube, pouring some directly onto his ass, and he gasps in surprise at the cold liquid. "Fuck," he says, looking back as I rub the lube in with my thumb. "You're not gonna--?" "Nope," I say. I grin a bit, knowing it's one of his favorite things to have done to him. Honestly, his ass is so edible-looking that I'd love to eat him out right now. But I feel like withholding a bit. I ease my thumb into him and he bites his lip. "You don't deserve to have your ass eaten tonight," I tease. He lets out a noise that's a mix between a laugh, a moan, and a whine as I finger him. I switch, using my index and middle finger on him for a bit before I can't wait any longer. I need to be inside him. I mount him and immediately sink my cock deep into his body. He grunts, clutching onto the bedspread tightly. I catch my breath before I start thrusting, going at a good pace right off the bat. "God, you're so tight," I grunt, pushing down on the small of his back as I work my hips in long strides. He just lies there, moaning and taking it, and I grin slightly, loving the feel of him, even just the sight of him under me. I grab onto his shirt for support, holding the back of it in my fist as I pick up the pace. I see him reach under him, probably to touch himself, and I stop, pulling his hands away. "Nuh uh," I say, grabbing his hands and pulling his arms behind his back. That gives me an idea. I let go of him and then pull out before I sit on his back, leaning over and having him lift up his head a bit so I can undo his tie. "What are you doing?" he asks, but I don't respond, quickly slipping the tie off of his neck and then getting back behind him. I grab his wrists, bringing them behind his back and then using the tie to bind them together with a sturdy knot. "Now you won't be tempted," I say, grinning before sliding my cock right back into him. He moans out, but I see him smiling, letting me use his body how I want to. I watch my cock rock back and forth between his thick cheeks, loving the wet, dirty sound of fucking. I tease him, too, pulling out fully and then thrusting all the way back in, and repeating this multiple times until I notice him biting on the sheets. Then I give it to him good, lifting his ass up and holding his hips as I thrust hard into him, bucking with intent. My orgasm creeps over me slowly, building gradually until finally, it tips. I try to keep thrusting as I cum but barely make it a few more times before my cock slips from his hole and just slides up between his cheeks, spewing cum all over his ass and lower back, even up his shirt a bit. I pant, swearing softly, grinding my cock slowly back and forth until I pull away and just enjoy the sight of RJ tied up with his ass presented to me, cum all over him. "This is a good look for you," I say, chuckling. He pants a bit, looking back at me. "You gonna untie me now?" he asks. "No." Instead, I grab him and roll him over onto his back. His cock, mostly hard, rests against his stomach, and I pick it up slowly in my hand. "I'm not finished with you." "Oh God," he moans out as I grip him firmly. I grab the lube, lubing him up liberally before I use both hands to stroke him, working both the base and the tip at the same time. His hips thrust up into my fists and I can't help but enjoy this. He says my name over and over as I work his cock, switching up speeds, firmness, stroke style, and overall intensity, keeping him on the edge of orgasm for nearly ten minutes before I decide I shouldn't torture him any longer. I use one hand to work every inch of his cock smoothly, rotating my wrist and milking the load out of him. He cums hard, shooting it high in the air before it lands all on his torso. "Wow," I say, laughing slightly as I slow down my hand to a gradual stop. I let go, watching his chest rise and lower, his eyes closed. He doesn't say anything, probably still recuperating, so I take the initiative and clean us up, grabbing one of his shirts from his hamper and wiping off my fingers before I come over to him and clean the cum off of his body. "You alive down there?" I say after I finish. I toss the shirt back into the hamper. "Mhm," he says, and I notice a soft smile on his lips. Then, after a pause, he laughs slightly to himself. I look at him curiously as I roll him onto his side. "What's so funny?" I ask, undoing the tie around his wrists. He sighs a bit, lifting his arms up and stretching out his wrists a bit. "Nothing," he says, glancing at me. "I'm just remembering how sweet and innocent you used to be." He grins my way. "I've created a monster." I can't help but laugh. He has a point. I wonder if I would have ever explored my more dominant side, or any other side for that matter, had I not met him. "Is this going to lead to an apology of some sort?" "For what?" he says with a short laugh. "Corrupting me," I say, lying down next to him with a smile. He chuckles, wrapping his arm around me, shifting my body so that we're facing each other. He kisses me. "I'm not sorry." I giggle a little. "Let's at least have a moment of silence for my innocence and youth," I say. "They lived a good life," he says, nodding before we fall into a small fit of laughter. He holds onto my side a bit as we calm down, breathing softly, both of us more or less studying each other's faces. I notice his eyes focusing in on different facial features, so I do the same, tracing his jaw, nose, and lips with my fingers playfully. And then he speaks up again. "I love you." I freeze up for a moment, and when I look into his eyes, I try so desperately hard not to smile like a fool when I see the way he's looking at me. It's the first time either of us have really said those words. Even though we may have felt it while it was unspoken, there's something so solidifying and validating about hearing it out-loud. I know him. I know it's probably hard for him to say -- it's something he confessed to me early on, something that was an issue with some of his past relationships. So I know it means a lot. And I know he means it. I grin, not at all surprised at how naturally the words come out of my mouth. How earnest they are. "I love you, too."