Date: Mon, 26 Jun 2006 21:11:32 EDT From: Heavensforlife@aol.com Subject: They Say- Chapter 27 **Standard disclaimer applies... contains depictions of gay sex. Continue at you own discretion.** They say that when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. They say to turn negatives into positives because negatives are opportunities in disguise. They say that every downside as an upside waiting for it on the other side. Jesse- There was someone new in the class. He came in a minute before the lecture was supposed to begin, everyone was already seated, and he handed a note to Brooklyn. He scanned the auditorium for an empty seat and ended up sitting right in front of me. He looked very European, not only his face and his curly hair, but in the way he dressed. His clothes were designer, probably from Italy or Spain, and they fit him perfectly. His body was tall and lean with about half an ounce of body fat. He sat tall in front of me and I couldn't help but stare at him. Even as Brooklyn began the lecture and tried to make eye contact with me, my gaze was steady drifting down towards the sexy guy in front of me. Finally, halfway through the class, I decided to do something about it. It's not like I'd taken down any notes about what Brooklyn was saying anyway, so I took out a pen and wrote down my name on a piece of paper and passed it to him. He replied a minute later on the back of the same paper with simply the words Marco. Nice to meet you. Marco. What a fucking sexy name, I thought. I smiled as I wrote another note on a different paper. Dinner? I didn't know how he'd react to how fast I was being, but I didn't feel like letting this sexy hunk get away, especially now that I was back at a comfortable part in my life. You're Forward. Where? He wrote in his reply. I smiled when I read it. You pick, I'll pay. I wrote. At this point, he looked back at me and I noticed for a brief second how deep green his eyes were. His bone structure was strong and his smile was to die for. Sounds good. Meet me after class. He wrote on the last note he'd passed. On the bottom was a little happy face with its tongue sticking out. On the back were two huge balls and a squirting penis. My cock jolted. "So if there aren't anymore questions, class is dismissed," Brooklyn announced. I stood up with my jacket hiding the bulge in my pants, walked out of the auditorium with a ridiculous grin spread over my face and managed to make my way out of the classroom without having to make eye contact with Brooklyn. Charles- I wasn't mad at Brooklyn. I wasn't upset or anything. In fact, I had no idea what I was feeling. I wasn't jealous, I wasn't disappointed, I wasn't indifferent. What ever I was feeling was completely new. He left for his usual classes and I lay there missing him. The conversation we'd had about me being afraid he'd leave me had ended with him lying on the bed beside me assuring me that that wasn't going to happen anytime soon. But moments after he left, I lay there, still afraid. This wasn't something that was supposed to bother me. I wasn't supposed to care what a guy I was sleeping with was feeling. It went against my philosophy. But Brooklyn wasn't a guy I was sleeping with. He was a guy that I cared about. A guy that I'd invested time and energy in, and that the payoff for that was great. I wanted him. And so I decided that if I wanted him, I'd have to let it go. He wasn't going to leave me unless he had a reason, just like I wasn't going to leave him for no reason. And so I'd bury it, not worry about it and move on like I always did. Zach- I tried his number three times and all three times it rang until it went to voicemail. "Are you coming to bed?" Shane shouted from the bedroom. "Yeah," I replied. "Give me a minute." I didn't want to go to bed. I wanted to talk to Tag. I wanted him to know that I'd moved on because I didn't know he was coming back and there was no way he could fault me for that. I also wanted him to know that he was being an unreasonable baby. I went through so many emotions that night. I was angry at myself for letting my guard and moving things too quickly with Shane. If I'd taken my time like I usually did, I wouldn't be so vested in Shane and going back to Tag would be easy. But the more I thought the more I got upset at Tag for putting me in this position. How could he expect me to be in the exact same place I'd been when he left. And not to start on the fact that the reason he was back wasn't because of some noble reason. He was fucking around with someone else. Why didn't I have the right to be upset and act like he was acting? Then I felt guilty, then indifferent, then too tired to feel anything. By the time I made the conscious decision to go to bed, Shane was fast asleep and snoring on his pillow. I took my clothes off, crawled under the cover behind him, and put my arm around him. Then I whispered, "I love you," and immediately fell asleep. Jesse- I lay there in bed not believing my good fortune from the afternoon before. I thought the day would suck, if only because I'd had to confront my fear of seeing Brooklyn again, but it ended up being one of the best days I'd had in a while. We'd met after class and decided I'd take him out to dinner tomorrow because he had a lot of registration and administration stuff to do that day. I told him that was cool and that I'd take him to a really great place. Talking to him was refreshing, not just because he had a sexy accent, but because it was light. He was funny, he giggled, he touched me somewhere every time he opened his mouth to say something. We flirted for all of 30 minutes before he had to say bye. I stood there and watched him go, a permanent grin on my face. Denton- "Oh shit," I muttered when I saw the single white flashlight make the slow walk from the police car to our car. Luke rolled down the window. "How's it going today fellows?" the officer said. The first thing I noticed were the cliché glasses he was wearing. The second thing I noticed was the bulge in his tight khakis. The third thing was the name on his nametag. "We're doing great officer... Holton," Luke replied respectfully. I flushed red with embarrassment as just as I was stealing another glance at the officer's prominent light stick; he shined the light in my face. I smiled up at him sheepishly as he asked me, "What are you fellows up to?" I tried my best to answer as assuredly as possible. "We're just heading up to Canada for the weekend." "I noticed that," said the officer. "I also noticed some illicit behavior going on while the two of you passed by on the freeway." I didn't say anything and neither did Luke. We just sat there waiting for the officer to continue. This time, when he started speaking, he put his leather-gloved hand over his crotch and squeezed. He spoke in a lower tone. "You do know it's illegal to perform acts of oral sex in a moving vehicle, right?" "We do officer," Luke replied. "Alright then," he said. "Since we're all aware of the law, what do you two think I should do about this discretion?" "Nothing, officer," I said in a timid tone. "It won't happen a guy." "Now what kind of officer of the law would I be if I let you two off without proper repercussion for your actions?" "A good one?" Luke replied sarcastically. He shined his light in Luke's face and said, "Step out of the car wiseass." Luke opened the door and got out of the car. He stood tall with attitude. I had no idea what was coming next. "Now you're little horny buddy in there did you the honor of getting your rocks off earlier, am I right?" Officer Holton asked staring Luke in the eye. Luke didn't say anything. "Am I right?" he repeated pressing his body up against Luke's, whose body pressed up against the car. "Yes," Luke replied losing his fire and realizing he may have made a little mistake. "Well then what say you get your wise ass on your knees and do me the same honor?" The cop took his glasses off to reveal that he was dead serious. I'd never seen Luke so submissive before. He got down on his knees, fumbling with his balance for a second. He reached up with his left hand to steady himself on the officer's thigh and with his right hand to unzip the officer's pants. "Watch what you do with that zipper, wiseass." I saw Luke's head tilt upward to look at the officer as he fished inside the pants for the cop's dick. "Is that what you want wiseass?" Luke didn't reply. With his leather hand, the cop roughly grabbed Luke by his tight ponytail and yanked his head back. "Tell me what you want wiseass." "It is," Luke said weakly. "What is?" "Your dick?" "My what?" "I want your fucking cock, you bastard," Luke replied refueling his attitude. The officer, obviously turned on by Luke's insolence smiled and released his head from his grip. "Alright then," he replied slowly. This time he was stroking the side of Luke's face. "Go for it." From the looks of it, Luke's philosophy was the sooner he got to it, the sooner it could end. He went down on the cop's dick with a gusto I'd never seen from anyone before, let along Luke. He tongued the officer's dick, long dicked it, deep throated it, kissed it and sucked it with energy that was foreign to me. The officer was obviously pleased with Luke's work because before long he was taking his gloves off, putting both hands on the back of Luke's mouth and face fucking my former roommate like he hadn't gotten off in days. "That's it, wiseass... yeah, bud. Suck my mother fucking cock." Hearing Officer Holton moan and groan from Luke's touch was turning me on. Seeing the back of Luke's head bob back and forth was turning me on even more. With as little noise as possible, I released my straining dick from my pants and started stroking it to the same rhythm Luke was being face-fucked by the cop. "Oh yeah, bud, that's what I'm talking about. Long dick that bitch," he was encouraging. It's not like Luke needed much encouraging. He was going at it with no signs of stopping. "Fuck yeah, I'm about to cum, bud... awwwh... oh fuck." I saw Officer Holten's hips buck wildly as his cock lodged deep inside Luke's throat. In the all the time I'd known him, I'd never seen Luke look so submissive. Even when he'd blown me off, he made it known that that's what he wanted to do and it was purely for his enjoyment, whatever you got out of it was bonus. But seeing him on his knees swallowing this officer's seed was unbelievable. He looked so sexy, tight ponytail pulled back, head bobbing back and forth, hands gripped around the officer's hips for better leverage. The look on the officer's face told me that Luke was giving him the best blow he new how. I was surprised the sexy cop was still standing. After the cop had spilled every ounce of cum onto Luke's tongue, Luke stood up and smiled, opened his mouth and showed the cop that he'd snowballed some of his cum. The cop was still weak from the amazing blow and probably didn't realize what Luke was doing until he'd done it. He opened his mouth, leaned his head in and kissed the cop fiercely on the lips. The two of them swapped spit, and cum, for a few minutes, the cop getting into by putting one hand around Luke's head and pinning him to the car. I noticed that Luke was once again stroking the cop's dick and that it was getting semi-hard again. The cop moaned and continued tongue-raping Luke like he'd never been kissed before. As suddenly as he'd started, Luke pulled back, opened the car door with his non-stroking hand and slipped in, leaving the cop still standing there dazed and confused. "That was fun officer," he said rolling down the window and starting the engine. "Too bad we have places to be. Later." And he sped away, leaving the cop standing there, still dazed and confused, pants around his ankles and cock standing straight up. Jesse- The next day dragged slower than any day I'd ever lived. I woke up early, sat around waiting for classes that seemed like they took forever to finish. I walked around campus hoping that if I moved, time would speed up and my date with Marco would come quicker. The sun finally went down after what felt like a week and I made my way back to my apartment to get dressed. We'd decided to meet at the library at 8 for dinner and then take it from there. I checked my messages, listened to two from Matt seeing if I was ok. I'd told him earlier that I was ok and that I was going on a date and he seemed happy. The third was from the registration office about something or other so I deleted. The third one jolted me. "Hey, Jesse," it began. "This is Brooklyn. Look, I need to talk to you about something very important so if you could come into class early tomorrow, I'd really appreciate it. Later." The possibilities raced. What did he want? Should I call him back and find out? Instinctively, thinking that maybe he wanted to patch things up or something, I grabbed the phone and dialed the number. I didn't even think of the possibility of Charles answering until the heard the "Hello," coming from the other end. I didn't know whether to say something or not, so I just held there quietly until he repeated the welcome three times, sounding more agitated after each. He finally hung up and so did I, feeling like a complete idiot. I looked at my phone, threw it down on the ground and got ready for my date. Charles- "Dinner looks good," I commented kindly as I went into the dining room to eat. Brooklyn had gone all out, even pulling out long stemmed candles to add atmosphere to the dinner. "So do you," he said smiling at me. I felt good. I felt like we were trying. I also felt like we were trying to hard. Is this really what people that were dating did? We talked mindlessly about different things: classes, English, my major, his career, swimming. It was light banter, not heavy. We laughed a lot, joked a lot, made fun of each other. At one point when he was going on about Literary Classics and I was zoning out, I slipped my leg up his thigh. It was fun watching him squirm while trying to keep his train of thought. Then the phone rang it. "You better get it," he laughed, looking down at his lap. I smiled and got up to answer the phone. "Hello," I said. There was no answer. I heard the breathing on the other line and knew someone was there, so I repeated it again and again. I finally hung up. "Who was it?" Brooklyn asked. "Dunno," I replied. "They didn't say anything." "Check the caller ID," he instructed. So I did. I immediately got angry, not understanding what was going on. I didn't want to fight, I decided. I didn't want to yell. I didn't want to make a big fuss, but I didn't want to be there. I didn't want to look at him. I needed to think. I walked back into the dining room and Brooklyn immediately knew something was wrong. He looked up at me with big eyes, wondering what was going on. I didn't say anything because I couldn't trust myself. I wasn't sure what I'd do if I opened my mouth, so I did the next best thing. I clicked the phone to the last call received and threw it on Brooklyn's plate, spattering marinara sauce all over his chest. I glared, without speaking. He saw the number, then the name of the caller underneath it and knew exactly what was up. I didn't even give him a chance to stand up before I was walking out of the door, half expecting him to follow me. I didn't realize it would take that long, but by the time he made it out side to catch me, I was at the corner, barefoot, heading for the parking garage so I could get in my car and leave. I didn't turn when he yelled my name. I didn't turn when he said he could explain. I crossed the street and didn't turn back. Zach- "The blue one," I said. "The black one," Shane said. We were both sitting on the couch looking up at the Italian as he held up two different outfits. One was a blue and white Rugby with a huge lion stenciled on the shoulder. It was sexy, urban and showed he had some kind of style. The other was plain black cashmere that looked like it would hug his chest perfectly, but it was just black. It had no personality. "Guys," he said amazing Shane and I again with his accent. "You're gonna have to pick one. I can't wear both." "Ok," Shane said. "Just try them on again." I looked at Shane and he winked at me. Marco proceeded to take his wife beater off, stretching his entire body as he did so. The two of us sitting on the couch simply stared in awe as he stood before us in nothing but boxers, looking hella sexy as usual. He slowly put one shirt on, modeled around in a circle before he tried on the second. When he'd taken the second one off, we heard the door open and slam as Charles stormed in. He walked into the bedroom, slammed the door, and yelled a curse word. We all looked at each other, none of us knowing what to say. "Blue," Shane said, recovering first. I nodded in agreement. As Marco was putting the blue shirt on, Charles opened his door like it had no hinges and stormed out. He threw his keys to the wall and crossed the living room to the kitchen. Again we looked at each other, not knowing how to react. He came out with a beer in both hands, jumped the couch and sat down on the loveseat adjacent Shane and I. "What?" he asked, eyes blazing. "Aren't any of you fuckers gonna ask me what the fuck is wrong?!" We all joined in the chorus at the same time of "What's wrong?" or "What happened," or "Is everything ok." "Well," he began. "Let me just tell you that Brooklyn is a bastard and Jesse is a fucking prostitute. Ugh," he shouted slamming one of his beers on the coffee table, "I'm so stupid." "You aren't stupid," Marco said. I looked at him, too late to stop him from saying anything that would get his head bit off. Shane winced. "What the fuck do you know?" Charles said with his voice surprisingly low. "Everything is great for you. Look, let me guess, you're getting dressed for a hot little date that your gonna bang tonight without even knowing his last name. Am I right?" Please don't answer that, please don't answer that, I tried telling Marco with brain waves. "Yeah," he replied. "Which one do you think I should wear?" he held up the black sweater next to the blue rugby he already had on. "Who gives a shit?" Charles asked. "Zach, what am I going to do?" "What do you mean?" "I mean, I can't dump Brooklyn," he said thinking rationally again. "I can't dump him because the bastard pulled his little, 'I love you' shtick. Why the fuck did I fall for that shit in the first place?" "Because you love him," Marco said. I decided it was finally time to intervene before Charles snapped. "Ok," I said standing and going towards the Italian. "It's time for you to go do your hair. This way, come on, let's go." I pushed him into the bedroom and closed the door behind him. "Thank you," Charles sighed as I walked back to the couch. "Ok," I said looking at Charles when I sat back down. "Now, you can't get blame yourself for falling for him. You can't help these things." "I know that, Zach," he said. "But listen. A month ago this would have been so easy. Cut ties, no worries, nothing. But I know that won't work this time. I can't go on doing something when I know it's not what I really want." "Then decide what you want," I said. "I want to be in control of myself again. I don't want to have to care, I don't want to get excited when I see him and sad when I don't. I want to have control over how I feel." "But you think its too late, right?" I said. "Like hell," he said looking pathetic. "Well it's easy then," I said soothingly. He snorted a laugh. "You said it yourself, you no longer have control. You can't fight the way you feel. You can't help whom you love, Charles, you just can't. And you're gonna go on and in a week a two, you're gonna think you're fine, but you aren't. And you might meet someone, and you'll be happy and everything will be great, but that thing you really want, instinctively will still haunt you. Brooklyn will still haunt you because you still want him, no matter how hard to bury that. So I say you work on it, fix it and don't put yourself through that. Just go back to Chris and make it work." I caught myself too late. I'd already said it. Shane looked at me with doe-eyes, like he was confused. Charles looked at me like I'd just confessed to murder. There was nothing left to say. "Good advice, Zach," Charles replied. "I'll call Brooklyn." He looked at me sympathetically, sighed and stood up. "That's really good advice," he said staring me in the eye, letting me know that I needed to follow it as well. Jesse- The night was a blast. I forgot about Brooklyn and Charles and all the crap I've been through the entire semester, and I had a blast. Matt had told me to have fun and not to worry about anything, it felt great to take his advice. We met up at the library steps and I was the early one. I didn't have to wait long because a couple minutes later, there he came, looking tall and skinny. His olive skin looked smooth and soft against a blue and white striped Rugby shirt. His package and ass looked great barely hidden under tight navy flat-fronts. His curly hair was a like crown around his face accenting his dark features. He smiled at me and I smiled back, the first step in a long night of flirting. As we walked to the car, he touched me every time he spoke. Not inappropriately, but affectionately. It was sweet. He'd laugh at something I said, and he'd grab my shoulder. He'd reply to a question and he'd graze my arm. He'd ask me a question and he'd take my hand while he did it. "So what do you think so far?" I asked when we made it to the restaurant. "About what?" he asked looking me straight in the eye. The way he did that was intimidating at first because I had nothing to hide behind. But I got used to it and I looked at him back. "Everything," I said. "About school," he started. "I think its filled with too much drama and not enough learning. My roommates always have some kind of a problem or other, and I've only been here a few days." I smiled. "About Texas," he began again. "I think it's nice if not a little too hot. About you," he continued. "I like what I see so far." "Well then I should show you more," I said sexily. "Are you saying we should skip dinner and go straight to sex?" he asked. "I would have put it a little more sensitively, but sure, why not?" "Let's go then," he said scooting out of the booth. "I hate American food anyway. I'll have to cook for you next time." "What I'm hungry for isn't on the menu," I whispered in his ear as we walked out of the restaurant. "My roommate is home tonight," he said. "So we should go to your place." "That's fine with me," I replied as we got into the car. Looking at how sexy this Italian was, I couldn't wait to get to my house any faster. Zach- "What was that about?" Shane asked when Charles left for his bedroom with the phone in hand. "Huh?" I asked blankly. "That look," he responded. "What look?" "The look Charles gave you when he left." "I'm not sure I know what you're talking about," I said uncomfortably. I knew exactly what he was talking about. "I'm not as stupid as everyone thinks," Shane said as seriously as I'd ever seen him. "What was the look about?" "No one thinks you're stupid, Shane," I said in an attempt to keep the conversation about him and away from me. "You do," he said, still serious. "No I don't," I said firmly. "I think you're funny. I think sometimes you say random things and I think you think outside of the box. But I don't think you're stupid." "Then why would you take a look from Charles and try to convince me that it wasn't a look?" he said. "Because it wasn't," I replied. "Ok," he said, leaning back onto the couch and crossing his arms. "I'll just sit here and be stupid, pretty-faced Shane while you continue on with your life, getting 'looks' from everyone and not sharing them with me." "Fine," I said growing slightly irritated. This guy wasn't as dumb as we all thought. "We need to talk." "About what?" "Ok," I said sitting up straight. "I need to talk and you need to listen." "Ok." "Before I met you," I started. "I knew this guy and we fell in love and I really, really loved him like crazy." "Tag?" "Listen," I bit him off. "No, not Tag. Chris." "Ok," he said. "But then I found out he was married and so I dumped him. Probably the stupidest thing I've ever done." "I think I've heard this story." "Ok," I said. "So fast forward to the look that Charles gave me." "What does Chris have to do with how Charles looks?" "Listen," I said irritated. "Sorry." "So," I explained. "I probably never fell out of love with Chris, even though I wanted to because there is no way I could ever get involved with a married guy. And so I tried not to love him. And I thought dating Tag would do the trick, but it didn't, and I thought dating you would do the trick." "But it didn't," he finished for me as I trailed off. "I understand." "It isn't even like that, Shane," I explained. "If I'd met you at the beginning of the semester we'd be great right now. There is nothing wrong with you or how I feel about you. We have fun, but..." I hesitated. "You don't have to explain," Shane said shakily. "So what does this mean?" "I genuinely don't know," I replied. "I don't know. I don't want to make a decision." Shane stood up off the couch and looked me with sad pathetic eyes. My heart lurched. "Well you're gonna have to," he said. He walked our the door looking like his entire world had crashed in on itself. The guilt I felt was unexplainable. I never wanted to hurt Shane or Tag, but I never asked to be hurt by Chris. I had no idea what to do, but I knew whatever I chose to do, I'd have to do fast because Shane wouldn't wait forever. Jesse- He was fucking gorgeous. I'd never seen anything like him. His body was lean and skinny, but muscular at the same time. He had intense eyes and when they looked straight at you, they seemed like they were on fire. His hands were like lazers, everywhere they could reach as fast as they could go. He didn't even wait for me to close the door behind us before he had me pinned to the wall and was raping my face with his long hot tongue. I could hear him moan from deep within as we kissed roughly. I brought my hand up behind his head and ground him closer to me. His hands were all over the place. They felt my chest, my abs, my back, my ass, my crotch, my legs. I didn't know how he got to so many places without releasing his tongue from mine, but he did and it was amazing. Without taking a single second break, we backed up into the bedroom, not bothering to turn the lights on. It was insane. His clothes flew everywhere first. His shirt came off, then his belt, then his pants. Then it was my turn. Our lips never separated once until it was time for my shirt to come up over my head. And when we did take a break from the passionate kissing, I was instantly taken away by how he stared at me. His eyes were deep, electric, and powerful. He had me in his hands and he knew it. He picked me up gently, still looking me straight in the eye and tossed me backwards off the bed before climbing on top of me. He moved slowly, like a cat, and lingered his body just above mine before diving in for the kill. He went back to ravaging my face with his own, turning my tongue into his personal chew-toy and my body into a rubbing lamp. Slowly, he moved his body up and down the length of mine, letting our torsos, chests and crotches feel every inch of each other. Our bodies began sweating, causing a thin layer of lubricant to allow us to feel each other's every move. I was in a completely different place than I'd ever been. He picked up the pace, not letting go of my lips, but began pumping his body and up down as well as over mine. Our dicks were battling each other for domination and the more his thrust into mine, the harder the both of us got. Then he stopped. He stopped moving, stopped kissing, stopped staring intensely. I felt like my world had stopped. I looked up at him confused, begging him with my eyes. I wanted it and he knew that for a fact. "Let's fuck," were the only two words spoken of the night. I nodded weakly. He pinned my hands behind my head on the headboard with one of his massive hands and with the other, lifted my ass off the bed. Like a king kneeling powerfully before me, I saw his every move as I felt his every move. He gently loosened my hole with his two longest fingers, using both our precum as lube. The feeling was intense and amazing. He wasn't watching what he was doing, instead looking right into my eyes with the same fire that had turned me on before our clothes were even off. He smiled wickedly, sexily, lustily at me as I was powerless to do anything but lay there and feel him take me to heights unknown. Before I knew it, I felt the most intense feeling I'd ever felt in my life. His cock was slowly making an assault on my loosened whole. Never did he take his gaze off mine. Never did he take his hand away from mine. I was totally hypnotized under his control. His dick filled me up slowly until his body was right over mine and his cock was buried in me to the hilt. I moaned loudly, not daring to take my eyes away from his. He smiled down at me triumphantly and I nodded, this time signaling him to fuck me anyway he wanted. Neither of us uttered anything but incoherent moans and groans. He needed no direction, everywhere his dick thrust sent a wave of pleasure through me. He kept his face close enough that I could see his eyes and feel his breath but far enough away that I still had to long for his kiss. His paced got faster and harder, more powerful, and I got hotter and weaker, submitting every inch of my body to his use. And he used it. His long thick cock filled my ass in a way I hadn't been filled in months. Every time I felt I wanted more, he gave me more. And every time I felt I couldn't handle anything else, he slowed down. I didn't know what I'd missing all this time until I felt his cock swell inside of me. He let out an animalistic growl. His eyes closed and his face became inhuman, distorted by pleasure. Seeing him look so sexy above myself and feeling his cock pulse inside of me sent me over the edge. I'd never felt the kind of orgasm I felt that day. I felt like my insides had been turned out and that every sensory gland in my body was on fire. I let out a scream of pleasure as wave after wave of his hot cum filled my ass and spurt after spurt of my hot cum oozed out of the crevice that our joined bodies created. I wondered if I looked as hot as he did when my cock pulsed and my body instinctively took control. I decided there was no possible way that I could even come close to looking that hot and as he dismounted my body and lay beside me, I reveled ever inch of his incredibly gorgeous beauty. I was in some kind of sexual heaven. Charles- He called and left a message saying we needed to talk. I didn't call him back. I just lay there thinking about the same old same old. The Italian came in to get dressed, luckily didn't say anything to me about his date, and left saying he'd most likely be back really late. When I finally decided to call him, it was only because I was tired of thinking and coming to no conclusion. So I dialed the number and he answered on the first ring. "Is this gonna work?" I asked him. "I don't know." "Why is it so hard?" I asked. "I don't know." "Is it supposed to be this hard?" "I don't know." This time I didn't ask anything. I just sat there with the phone to my face. "I don't want it to be this hard, Charles," he said softly. Over the phone, his voice was barely inaudible. "What do we do? And don't say you don't know." "Well I don't," he said, his voice finally rising to something I could hear. "I just want us to be us." "Well I'm not sure about you, but me doesn't usually get involved in relationships like this," I said. "I know." "So you do know something," I joked. "I know, Charles," he continued seriously. "I know that I really like you, I love you. And I care about you. And I think about you when I shouldn't and I smell things you've touched. And I count down the hours till I'll see you again and I don't want to hurt you." "And all that isn't enough?" he didn't answer so I continued. "Cuz I feel the same way, except ten times worse. And I don't know how to sort these feelings cuz I've never had them before." "Me either," he replied. "So what do we do?" I asked again. "We do us," he said as if he was unsure. "We just do what we do and we stick with it. We don't think too hard or try too hard. We just do what we do." He paused and I didn't say anything so he added finally, "And if that isn't enough, then we rethink our plan. All I know is that I want to be with you." "Ok," I said. "Only you," he added. "And I want you to only be with me." "Ok," I replied, not taking a second to think. It was an easy decision and I was happy to make it. I had officially turned into what I'd avoided turning into for 18 years. I was a boyfriend. Zach- I made the phone call late that night. I didn't hesitate. As soon as I mustered the courage, I didn't back down. I took out my cell phone, dialed the number out of memory and waited. Ring. I wanted to hang up, but I forced myself not to. Ring. I thought about what he'd say. He'd say I was too late. He'd say that I'd waited too long. He'd say that it didn't matter, that he'd moved on. Ring. He wasn't going to answer. It'd three rings. He'd seen my number and he wasn't going to answer. I should hang up. If he didn't answer after the next one, I would hang up. Ring. That made four. Or was it three? Maybe he was asleep. Maybe I should hang up and try again in the morning. Or go by the library tomorrow and just talk to him. "Hello?" I heard the voice I'd never forgotten. "Hi Zach." "Hi," I said sheepishly, like I'd done something wrong. "I was just calling you." "For what?" he asked. Why was I calling him? I thought. What did I want? "I, umm," I began. "I just," and before I could stop them the tears started flowing with the words. They went hand in hand. I confessed that I'd made a mistake. I confessed that I was sorry for letting him go. I told him that I forgave him for lying to me and I told him I wanted him back. And after I'd said everything I could and cried every single tear that was inside of me, I sat there. I waited. I sat there and waited for him to say something. "Zach," he began. "..." Jesse- "That was fun," he said as he lingered by the door for a few extra seconds. "Yeah it was," I responded. "I still owe you a dinner," he smiled. "Yeah you do," I replied. He kissed me, said goodnight, and left. I was floating. As soon as the door closed, I felt empty again. But I didn't feel as empty as I'd felt in the past because I knew that I'd see him again. He'd call me. And then I felt a different kind of empty. I needed something to eat. I checked the fridge. Empty. I looked at the clock. Late. There was only one place still open this time of night and so I grabbed a sweater, but on a pair of jeans and made the dash to After-Hours. As soon as I walked in I noticed him sitting here, brooding. I looked at him, his back semi-turned to me, drinking away, not paying attention to what was going on around him. He must have been the only one in the joint. I said hello to the bartender, ordered two drinks and made my way to the booth. "Can I sit down?" I asked. "I'd rather you didn't," he said saucily, like he'd had one too many. "I bring gifts," I said laying a cup down next to him. He looked up at me, his eyes red, I assumed from forcing back tears. He looked crushed. "What do you want? And who the fuck are you?" "I'm Charles' old roommate," I replied, taking this grand opportunity to invite myself to sit down. "And I couldn't help but notice that you were his new roommate." I paused as he continued to look at me pathetically. "And I wanted to know what happened to you." "First, I'm not Charles' roommate anymore, I'm Zach's," he said. "And second, I don't really think what happened to me is any of your business." "No," I replied quickly, "I know that. And I didn't mean to intrude at all. The thing is, they both screwed me over a while back, and I just wanted to make sure they didn't screw you over as well." He muttered something incoherent under his breath, averted his eyes for a few seconds and then looked back at me. "It isn't like that," he said finally, sighing. "It probably isn't," I said. "And I shouldn't have come over here." I got up and pondered walking away. I sat back down and looked him square in the eye when I added, "But let me tell you something. Whatever Zach or Charles did to screw you over, like they did me, they shouldn't be able to get away with it. Do something, and if you love them enough, get them back. Otherwise, make them pay." With that, I stood up and headed straight for the door without looking back. I was just about to put my arm on the door handle, losing hope that this little kid would pick up the bait when I heard his voice say from behind me, "Hey wait. Let me tell you what happened, and you can tell me what to do." I smiled. They say that every negative is a positive in disguise. They say that when life gives you lemons make lemonade. And since they also say that revenge is sweet, what better way to flavor that lemonade life just gave you. Comments always welcome at Heavensforlife@aol.com