Date: Tue, 24 Jul 2012 23:35:15 -0700
From: Stephen Johnson <gaysteveisgay@gmail.com>
Subject: Exploring

Standard disclaimer .. My story, not yours, respect that. If consentual gay
sex offends you then I'm not sure what you are doing here in the first
place, but read no further ... Support Nifty and donate to help keep this
amazing site running!

This is the story of my first gay sexual experience, it's completely
factual and happened yesterday.  I am 38.

I came out to my wife 2 years ago, a few months after we separated for the
last time. She'd called and wanted to talk over coffee, and after I few
minutes I could tell that she was trying to convince me to get back
together.  I knew I had to tell her the real reason I had left. I thought
that she'd freak out, call me a faggot, who knew.  She took it really
well.  In fact, I think it answered a lot her questions about our long
marriage and since then, we have been great friends ..

We got married young, I was 19, and we were together for 18 years.  In all
those years, I never once cheated on her.  I had thought about it a few
times over the years, but I was so buried in the closet that there was no
way I could convince myself to, not only cheat on my wife, but actually
have sex with a guy.  So, instead, I relied on a healthy fantasy life and a
LOT of gay porn.

Having come from a fundamental Christian upbringing and being active in
that religion up until my wife and I split, it was difficult moving past
the 'brainwashing' I had endured for 36 years.  I have only publicly been
"out" for about 8 months.  In that time, I had planned on finding a nice
guy, getting into a relationship and having that be the guy that would be
my "first" .. As a kid, I had messed around plenty with other boys, but
that was limited to fondling, and mutual jack-off sessions.  Nothing
"really" classified as sex.

During the past 8 months, I have also joined a couple of online groups that
were comprised of people like me, that had been in the same religion, were
gay and were free from that fundie nightmare.  I had even met a few in
person, and had become very close friends with them, but of course, given
my reservations, I kept landing squarely in the friend zone.  One of those
friends finally grabbed my shoulders one day, looked me in the eye, and
said "Go. Get. Laid! Whore it up a little."

That was hard for me to even consider.  I still had a "monogamous"
mindset.  I finally decided I would start trolling Growlr, Scruff and a
couple of the other Bear centric sites. I am large hairy guy, and I love
large hairy guys.  I was shocked at the reception .. I was constantly
getting messages from guys who wanted to "hook-up".  Having never done
anything, and being a little afraid of some things, I was a little too
reserved, and frankly turned off by the "come over and suck my dick" or "I
want to fuck you right now" messages.  Most of them were from "chasers"
too, which I just wasn't into.

Yesterday morning, I was sitting at my desk working, and I got a message.
I kind of sighed a little, wondering what excuse I was going to come up
with to not meetup with this guy.  To my surprise, a delicious looking
older bear was messaging me.  He profile shot was awesome, and instantly
interested me.

We exchanged the typical pleasantries, which was a nice change from the
normal hurry up and fuck messages.  I specified in my profile that I wanted
to massage and maybe do oral. So he asked if I like to meetup and exchange
massages, and "loads" .. I noticed he was from a city about 45 minutes
away, so I felt comfortable flirting a little, since I didn't think we
would meetup.

Turns out he worked in my city, so he was very close.  I felt a pit form in
my stomach .. What was I gonna do now? I heard the voice of my friend "Go.
Get. Laid!" and gave him my address.

It was early in the day, and he was coming by after work, so I had all day
to work myself into a frenzy... Was I really going to do this?  What if he
was weird, or tried to do things I didn't want to do.

Finally, the door bell rang.  For a minute I considered pretending I wasn't
home, but the excitement and thrill over powered it.  I opened the door,
and there stood before me a hunk of a bear.  Curves in all the right
places, and a beautiful goatee.. He came in and we chit chatted over a
beer.  I didn't really know what to do.  I had told him that I had never
done anything and this was all very new to me.  So thankfully, he took the
lead, and came over, stood in front of me, and began rubbing my chest and
shoulders.  Then he leaned in and kissed me.  Our lips locked, and our
tongues danced together to music that I thought only I was hearing.  I
couldn't believe it. I was kissing a guy, and not just kissing him, but
making out! I was making out with a gorgeous, delicious stranger of a man
that 5 minutes before I had never seen before.

We stood in the kitchen for what seemed like days, exploring each others
bodies with our hands while our tongues continued their newly found
pleasure.  I had a sudden, irresistible urge to take off his clothes! I
unbuttoned a couple of the buttons of his shirt, and my hands dove in to
rub his chest.  He had the most amazing nipples and I couldn't help but
play with them.  I realized if we stayed there much longer I'd have him
naked in my kitchen, which would be awkward if my roommate came home.

We moved into the bedroom, and the whole time walking back to the bedroom I
was in utter shock.  Was I really going to do this? As soon as the bedroom
door closed we locked lips again and I started removing his shirt.  Once he
was naked from the waist up, I took a moment to admire his amazing chest,
with the nipple piercings, and thought .. This gorgeous man is in my
bedroom and ready to pleasure me in ways I had never been pleasured.

He slid my t-shirt off, and resumed rubbing my chest and back.  Meanwhile I
grabbed his belt and unbuttoned his pants. I thought, this is it.  Once the
pants come off, there is no going back.  I dropped them to his feet, and
got to my knees to help him get out of them.  While I was on my knees, I
caught a whiff of him and my erection almost tore my shorts open.  I stood
back up and he started taking my shorts off.  I couldn't believe how sexy
it was to be undressing him and having him undress me.  We stood for a
moment in our underwear, and I was reluctant to take that last step, again,
sensing my hesitation, he took the next step and I was naked.  I hooked my
fingers in the waistband of his underwear and started slowly pulling them
down. I was on my knees again, and there right in front of me was this
magnificent cock. Inches from my face.  I was enthralled.  It had been 22
years since I was this close to another cock.

I stood back up again before I completely lost it and we stood naked
together and began exploring each others bodies with our hands.  I kissed
down his neck and check and engulfed his nipple in my mouth, while he
moaned loudly.  I was new at this, but I could tell that he was definitely
going to want me to work those nipples. I slid my hand down his stomach and
found what I was searching for.  His huge cock dangled, waiting for me to
bring it to life. I cupped his balls, and stroked his cock a couple of
times and he brought me back up to eye level and led me over to the bed.

My brain froze again, but only for a split second.  I was finally getting
comfortable.  The mix of nervousness, and excitement was melding into an
overwhelming anticipation for what was going to happen next.

We lied down on the bed facing each other and began kissing again.  Our
hands exploring every inch of each other.  My hesitation completely gone,
and the ecstasy had taken over.  I started exploring his body with my
kisses, moving slowly down his chest, stopping to work his nipples some
more, I could tell by his moaning that he was loving it, but my mouth had
other things in mind. I had fantasized about having a cock in my mouth for
as long as I could remember, and my moment had come. I slid down and stared
at his amazing cock for a split second before I engulfed it in my mouth.
My brain, exploded.  It was so much more amazing than anything I had ever
imagined.  The smells, the flavor, the feeling of this man's engorged cock
in my mouth was pure ecstasy.  I would have been happy to spend the rest of
my life sucking, licking and enjoying that cock.  My nose buried in his
pubes, feeling the head of his cock hitting the back of my throat, and his
prince albert piercing knocking against my molars.  I pulled my head off
sucking as hard as I could while I did.

Having watched a lot of porn, I always saw them bobbing furiously on the
cock, so I needed to try that.  I started pumping as fast as I could, while
my hand roamed up his chest and began violently twisting and pulling at his
nipples.  His whole body flailing, twitching and squirming while he moaned
and moaned.  I could tell he was loving it, and knowing that I was causing
that level of joy was enthralling! I never thought I would be able to
properly suck a man's cock, but as I did it for the first time in 38 years,
I felt like I was born to do it.

After a few minutes he grabbed me and pulled me up to him and in a rage a
passion we mauled at each other and our tongues intertwined. He flipped me
over and ran his hands down my back and I felt his face dive into my ass,
and then a feeling that I never thought possible washed over my body.  I
had no idea what he was doing for a minute, I only knew that I never wanted
it to end.  His tongue was pushing through my crack and entered my hole. I
wanted to squeal with joy .. his tongue shot in and out, in an out, in and
out and with each entry I thought I would explode cum all over the bed. His
hand slid between my legs and found my cock. He stroked it, and rubbed me
all over.

He flipped me back over and dove down on my cock and it disappeared into
his mouth .. his tongue worked my shaft and sent shivers up and down my
body, I was close.  I could feel my cum welling up, but there was no way I
was letting this end.  I pulled him off me and he came back up to my mouth
and we kissed.  I could taste my own cock, mixed with the flavor of his in
my mouth.  The flavors blended together in an orgasmic mixture of
experience and naivety.

He laid down on his stomach and I straddled him. I grabbed the massage oil
from the night stand and began massaging his back and shoulders.  My erect
cock was resting in the crack of his ass, and with each stroke of the
massage my cock would slide deeper while I fucked his crack.  I dripped
some of the oil onto my cock so it would slide easier.  I could tell he
wanted me to fuck him, but I just wasn't ready for that, but I pushed hard
against his hole, and I wanted to go all the way, but just could bring
myself to do it.

When I finished massaging him we kissed some more, I needed a moment to
clear my head and let the waves of pleasure subside a bit.  We explored
each others bodies again and I needed to have his cock in my mouth again.
So I dove down for seconds and worked his cock like there was nothing else
in the world that mattered.  My hand slid between his legs and I rubbed his
taint while working working my way to his ass.  My finger felt his hole and
without even thinking I shoved it all the way in.  Meanwhile my other hand
worked it's way up to his nipples and, by now, I had figured out that he
liked it rough.  I tugged and twisted at his nipples and finger fucked his
ass, while my mouth and tongue explored every inch of his delicious cock.

He writhed in pleasure.  I thought he'd buck me right off the bed.  I could
tell he was close, but I wasn't stopping until he made me.  He grabbed me
with both hands and pulled me up to him.  His passion overtaking him, he
kissed me roughly.  I loved the feel of his beard as he pawed and kissed me
all over.  He worked his way down to my cock and took it all in and began
pumping furiously.  I was on the edge, and couldn't hold it anymore.  I
warned him that I was going to cum. I held it as long as I could, and
screamed "I am going to cum!" and it just made him go harder.  He wanted
all I could offer him.  I blew my load all over the back of his throat and
I could feel him swallowing. I thought he would swallow my entire cock.  I
screamed in pleasure as load after load exploded from my cock.

When he finally pulled off, my cock was so sensitive I didn't think I could
stand anymore. I fell into an orgasmic stupor as he cuddled up to me and
lied on his back. I took both my hands and worked his nipples while he
furiously jacked his cock.  The harder I pulled and twisted the more he
moaned and his body started convulsing as he blew his load.  He moaned and
squirmed and twitched for over a minute as he came.

This man, my first, so amazing, so patient.  I felt as though I had known
him my whole life, and in that moment all that I had wanted in my life, all
that I had denied myself because of shame and religious guilt washed away
and was replaced with the most content and satisfied feeling I ever
experienced.

I had only known him for a little more then an hour, but I will never
forget him, or that first time.

Comments can be sent to gaysteveisgay@gmail.com