Date: Sun, 08 Dec 2019 13:44:30 -0500 From: mike shinhearl Subject: Why I needed help part 1 I was 22 years old the first time I entered a Adult Book store , I had heard that they showed X-Rated movies in a back room and being a horny 22 year old really wanted to see some females sucking big dicks. I didn't have a girl friend , I was a super shy guy that had a hard time talking to girls , I was somewhat cute , long black hair, blue eyes and skinny .This book store was 20 miles from my house and was in the city of Cleveland , I didn't know what to expect and was really nervous as I parked in the lot across the street trying to get my nerve up to go in. It must have been a rough area because there was quite a few black guys around and a few of them in the parking lot and they seemed to be eyeing me which really made more scared than nervous , why were they looking me like that I wondered , I did not want to get beat up so I thought about leaving but really wanted to see some girls sucking cock so I said fuck it and took a deep breath got out of my car and went into the store. I was walking across the lot and I thought I heard the black guy in the parking lot ask me if I was looking , I acted like I didn't hear him and hurried into the book store as I heard another black guy whistle at me and tell out " hey sweetness " , I was embarrassed big time , that was pretty gay I thought , I had zero interest in gay sex , especially with a black guy , disgusting , what white guy would ever have sex with a black guy. As I walked into the bookstore the thought of what just happened was fresh in my mind , my god , did that black guy want to have sex with me ? Nasty , like I would suck some black guy's dick , gross. Between what just happen and being in the bookstore my heart was pounding like mad , to the point where it was almost overwhelming. As I entered I took a scan around the bookstore , it was a dingy and old place with odd smell , not the nicest place , had that inner city feel to it which I was not used to. There were two big black guys working the counter who were eye balling me big time , which did not help my nerves. I quickly looked away towards the magazine area where there was three other black guys looking at the mags who were also eyeballing me. They were looking at me like I was a piece of meat and they were hungry dogs , they all looked at me like I was way out of place. I was starting to wonder if I made a mistake in coming here. I lived in a all white city , went to a all white school , did not know or never even knew any black guys , they were all blacks to me and now I'm the only white boy in a black dirty bookstore . I saw the opening to the movie section and quickly headed to it with my head down avoiding any eye contact with these blacks . I was just about to enter the darken room hoping the darkness would at least give me some comfort and get away from these blacks . As I was about to enter I heard a deep voice yell out , " Hey boy , you need to buy some tokens ". I was really embarrassed now as I had to walk back past the black guys in the store who were somewhat laughing at me like I was a fool white boy. I went up to the counter where the black dude was and he rudely said I needed at least five dollars in tokens , I wanted to be cool so I got thirty dollars worth . When I turned to go back the counter guy gave me grin and said have fun . I noticed the black guys were no longer in the magazine section , I knew they had not left so I figured they must have gone in back , fuck , I hope they don't bother me. I headed into the darkness of the back room hoping for some comfort in the dark room at least. What first hit me was the smell , bleach , cum and piss , it was nasty but some what intoxicating. It was dark and took a second for my eyes to adjust as I looked around there were many little hallway type areas with the movie booths located thru out and I noticed more black guys roaming around , I really felt out of place and now scared , a young skinny white boy in a room full of horny black guys all checking me out big time made me feel unsafe and uncomfortable. It was then that I realized it must have been a a gay bookstore. I started to quickly look for booth just so I could hide , what a mistake I made coming here , all these fags in here , black at that , not me. I couldn't wait to watch a movie with a white girl sucking some white dick. Most of the booths didn't even have doors , i found one with a door which was opened just little bit , I didn't notice a movie playing so I had thought the booth was empty and I entered to see two things , a totally naked black guy sitting there stroking his rock hard huge black cock and he was watching a movie showing a white girl sucking a big black dick , I stood there unable to move or take my eyes away from the movie screen to my right with this white girl swallowing this big black cock and to my left was this naked black guy stoking his disgusting black beast of a cock . He stared at my eyes hard as he grabbed the base of his cock and started shaking it hard back and forth towards me , I watched as in slow motion a big blob of precum flung out and landed on my shoe and as I wearing shorts I felt it also land on my leg , my brain swelled like I took a hit of a drug. What the fuck , my dick started swelling up as I backed out of the booth , I couldn't think straight and needed to get my mind right , this was way to much for me. I headed down another mini hallway to a darken booth. I thought I heard what sounded like gagging or a choking sound as I slowly opened the door to a sight that ended up changing my life for ever , probably the only other white guy around was on his knees sucking some black guys huge hard cock. They didn't know I was there and I stood there transfixed on what was happening in front of me. I couldn't believe it , the white guy was on knees with a good size black guy standing over him feeding him a huge cock brutality fucking his face. I had a perfect view of it , that cock was so big and hard I could tell it was going way down the white guys throat . He was fucking his face and throat like you would fuck some sluts pussy as the black guy kept calling him a useless white fuck cunt and a little sissy bitch. The black guy shoved his whole cock down his throat and held it there then spit on the white guys face , he seemed to be getting off on the abuse . What is wrong with this white guy I thought , fucking disgusting . I stood and watched for what ever reason , I thought I would need to throw up but my dick was starting to get hard , what the fuck. It was then they noticed me , I thought they would be mad but they increased there pace , I couldn't believe this white guy could take such abuse. The black guy grunted and shoved his cock down that white guys throat as he stared right into my eyes , the noise he was making was like a crazed animal , I knew he was unloading that load into the white guys belly. I could tell the black guy liked doing this to a white guy while another white guy watched . I backed out of the booth , oh my God , did that white guy really eat the sperm from that black guy ? I had to find a booth to be alone,that was way more than anything I had ever experienced or even thought of , fucking faggots . I couldn't believe the white guy had done that . I wasn't sure if the white guy wanted to do that or maybe he was forced ? Maybe he was like me , just a white guy who happened to come in here and I had just witnessed a rape , not a normal rape , but a oral rape , the way that black guy fucked the white guys face and throat was not normal and who would actually swallow sperm from a black guy. When I got into the booth and closed the door and i wondered why is my dick so hard ? Not only was it hard but it never had been harder , I looked down and precum had soaked thru to leave a huge wet spot on my shorts. The booth I entered had a door but no lock and had weak hinges on it so it wouldn't fully close but it gave me some privacy which I really needed. I sat down on the small couch type thing and noticed how slimy the floor was , I didn't think to bring tissues with me so I figured everybody must just cum on the floor anyway , nasty , I'm going to have to throw these shoes away I thought . I saw the video screen across from me with a slot for tokens next to it and a dial with the different movies to watch and a separate dial for the volume . Seemed easy enough. I felt a little more comfortable being in the booth alone although I was a little worried about my dick being hard after the gay sex I had witnessed but I figured some straight white sex would make me alright . I put some tokens into the slot and unbuttoned and unzipped and pulled down my shorts reliving my hard dick which seemed kinda small after seeing those black cocks . The screen lite up and there it was , porn , it was like a drug to me. The first movie up was a white girl sucking a black dick , I switched the dial , the second movie was a black guy with a hugh cock fucking a white slut in the ass , switched again , the third movie a white girl on her knees surrounded by a group of blacks taking turns as she sucked them all . I switched to the next movie and it was a white guy sucking off a black guy , the next one was a real shocker , a white guy eating the asshole of a black guy , hardcore and close up. I watched this for a few moments with disgust not believing what I was seeing , the black guy was sitting on the white guys face , his hands spreading his asscheeks wide , his asshole opened and the white guy with his tongue halfway into it . This really made my dick swell , he was tongue fucking a Black's asshole . I felt like that was the hottest thing I ever saw , what the fuck. I turned the dial quickly , finally , a white girl sucking some white dick , something normal and after a minute of watching something boring. I was losing my hardon as I watched straight white sex , the white guys dick was puny and pasty . In the back of my mind was black cock and that black guys asshole , that thought made my dick swell again . O.k. just this once , I turned the dial to the white girl sucking off those black guys , I got there at a great part of the movie , the cum shots. The white girls face was covered with her saliva and their cum , seven black dudes took turns fucking her throat then shooting their cum into her mouth , she didn't swallow until they all unloaded then she swallowed it all. My God , I was so fucking hard watching that , wondering what it would be like to be that girl , sucking all that black cock , what was it like to have it shoved into your throat over and over till it shot that thick load of nasty black cock cum , swallowing it into my belly. No please , I said to myself as I turned the dial to the asseating movie . What was wrong with me ? This is total faggot shit , even worse , this is the worst of worst . I became so hard I didn't care , and I didn't dare touch myself , I was going to make an serious mess on this floor ,the thought of the nasty floor seemed to make me harder or higher at this point because I was starting to feel a high or something euphoric . I took my shorts off completely as the asseating video started , I think it was a short video on a loop and not a full movie . The white guy was flat on his back and the black was on his feet squatting down with his ass over the white boy's mouth , the camera work was great as it showed that tongue way up into that black asshole , in and out fucking that asshole with his tongue to then he place his mouth and lips over the Rosebud like asshole and was French kissing and sucking out on it like you would kiss a girls mouth if you were in a sexual frenzy. He orally made love to that black man's asshole. It was making my dick so hard . I had to hear what they were saying so I turned up the volume to hear the black dude say " oh yea white boy , suck that black ass ". It was kinda loud and I was sure it was heard outside the booth , I left it turned up as the black went on about the tongue fucking he was getting and verbally abusing the white guy . I was sitting there wondering what It was like for that white guy , had to have been nasty , what would it be like to actually have your tongue shoved into a black guys asshole , eating It , sucking at It , French kissing a black guys asshole , making love to it. I was in a trance thinking of It . It was then the door slowly opened and I looked over to see a black guy standing there with his cock fully exposed stepping towards me looking at the screen then over to me , what must he have thought , a naked white boy looking sitting here watching this absolute nasty stuff . He was one of the guys that was in the magazine area when I first walked into the bookstore . He was a big guy , not fat but stocky with a black cock that must of been made by God himself . This thing was almost animal like , dark , big and fat with a big round head and a piss slit that looked like a canyon . He had it in his hand as he walked up to me stroking it pointing it towards my face , I'm sure he thought I was going to suck it for sure I mean who wouldn't ? A half naked white boy sitting there with a massive hard on watching nasty gay interracial porn with lust and fear in his eyes , drunk on black cock , but no way was I going to take it in my mouth , even though I thought about it . No way , that would make me a fucking queer , a faggot , a black cock sucking sissy white punk bitch , no better than that fag eating that Black's ass , that's not me . I was getting scared , what if he forced me ? He could if he wanted to what could I do , I was a skinny weak ass naked white boy , I was power less . He walked up to me and put his one leg in between my legs and his other outside my right leg , he was wearing shorts so I could feel his skin against mine . He got up real close to me aiming that beastly ugly cock towards my face to where the head was inches from my face , I must have looked like a fool , my mouth hanging opened just staring at the massive glistening head with that long wide piss slit with a big blob of precum dripping off it , wow , there was a lot of it just oozing out , I was so tempted to give it a wet kiss but no way , there is no taking that back . I just sat there like a fool staring at this thing equal to and just a inch from my face as he started to Jack it harder and harder the precum now being flung onto my shirt and naked leg , I was hoping I would get to see him cum on the floor in front of me but he had a other idea as he Jacked on it hard yet slow on his massive cock . I knew he was about to cum and I was waiting for him to turn towards the floor but it kept it aimed towards my face , I just stared at it as he started to squeeze the base of his cock hard and started to grunt like his was cumming but there was nothing until he released his grip . What happened next was a epic moment in my life , like a fire hose a torrent of hot cum shot out of that massive glistening piss slit hitting me square in the face , it splashed into my right eye socket , the next shot was even bigger and more forcefull than the first , that one went directly into my opened mouth , a hugh amount landed on both of my lips and deep onto my tongue , there was so much of it and the taste was so nasty but I surprisingly didn't feel the need to throw up . The third shot landed on my lower lip and chin , it felt hot , the forth ,fifth and sixth landed onto my shirt then onto my hard as steel dick which made it slimy as I grabbed it . I could feel the slim of his cum on it as I stroked it once as I stared at this beautiful , I mean nasty sight in front of my face when my cock exploded. Where as when he unloaded it was like a fire hose , mine was more like a garden hose , it was almost like a steady stream of my cum shooting up and landing in the same spots as his just landed , I couldn't believe the intensity and amount of it . My cum landed on the same path as his , up to my forehead onto my nose , across my upper lip into my mouth and onto my lower lip and chin and my shirt intermixing and blending with his . My face was covered with our cum and I could taste it in my mouth , I could taste the difference between his and mine on my tongue , his was way nastier , way stronger with almost a burning sensation . I was having a out of mind experience , like a state of europa , something I can not explain . The visual sight was crazy , me sitting here with all this cum on my face , shirt saturated with cum , my hard dick coated with a black man's cum and being in a darken booth with a glow of a nasty gay porno showing with a large black man standing close to me with his hard cock in my face . I was staring at this massive black cock head right next to my face and mouth , his long and wide piss slit was full of a hugh blob of cum , NO , I thought to myself . No , don't do it , I wanted to give it a kiss so bad , NO , that would make me a fag , I hate fags . Just this once , it was to fantastic of a sight , I wanted to kiss and taste and feel it on my lips and in my mouth , I couldn't resist . I leaned over and opened my mouth , just a kiss , just this once , just a quick mouth open , tongue out French kiss . The sensation that flowed through me was indescribably the moment my opened mouth kiss came in contact with that cum covered cock head as my lips slid over it and my tongue went right into the piss slit and slurp out the blob of cum onto my still coated tongue . I was slurping and kissing and swirled my tongue around it when I noticed another black guy behind him with his cock out and hard just as the movie ended I started to come off my high and I realized what was going on,WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING ? ON MY GOD, I'M A FAG , A FUCKING QUEER . Oh man , I have got to get out of here , as I moved my head back and removed my mouth from this black guys cock head and with all the cum on my lips there was multiple strings attaching us . I was coming to my senses and realized the epic mistake I made , what was I doing ? What did I do ? This is not me , I like girls , I'm not gay , not a fag . I had to go . I backed off , I had to put my shorts back on but they had fallen onto the cum covered floor , fuck , I could feel the wetness on them as I slid them on over my nasty cum soaked shoes which came into contact with the inside of my shorts pant leg , as I slid my shorts up quickly I feel the nasty wet cum on them , inside and out . It was beyond nasty but I didn't care i just had to go , I left my underwear and moved quickly past the two black guys into the hallway to head out of here . I was spitting all the cum out of my mouth as I headed out of here , thankfully , I was pretty sure I didn't swallow any , but there sure was a lot . I was in a different state of mind now , what is wrong with me ? I walked past all the black guys on the way out , they almost were forming a line as I headed towards the safety of the lighted way out of here , I entered the lite magazine area ,almost out of here . As I entered right there was a interracial couple , white girl , black guy , the girl looks right at me and starts to laugh out loud at me , I forgot , the cum on my face , her boyfriend gives me a funny look . I must have looked like a fool and a queer . I head towards the door as I look over at the counter at two guys working there and see they are checking me with a intense stare and grins on there faces as I hit the door the one yells out , " and another one is born , see ya soon " . No fucking way , I'll never be back here , all I want to do is go home and take a hot shower , brush my teeth for a hour , burn my clothes then go find a girlfriend . This is not me . I get through the door , outside into the bright sunlight , safety , let me get back to normal , clear my head . I'm starting to feel the cum on my face and can really taste it in my mouth , nasty . There's a few people outside the bookstore hanging around , I made eye contact with another white girl who looked like a meth head , she gives me a weird look but I don't care I just headed across the street to my car to get the hell out of here forever , I'll never come back here . I cross the street and head towards my car when I see the black guy from the parking lot from earlier , the one that ask if I was looking . He was heading right towards me trying to intercept me before I got to my car , we both got there at the same time . Now I was scared , this was one tough and mean looking black guy , he had that ex con homeless look to him . He looked clean , was wearing a grayish white t-shirt and what must of been a old pair of light grey sweatpants and because of the bulge of his cock , no underwear . They were worn thin and I could really see his cock dangling and swinging around . He confronted me . " Hey baby , looks like you had a good time in there " , he said as he grabs my arm and sees the cum on my face . I look him up and down with total fear in my face . He smells like beer and weed and then I noticed all the dry piss stains on his sweatpants , nasty . I pulled my arm away and get into my car , this seems to anger him so I locked my door. He stands there with a angry look on his face . " Come on baby , suck my dick for me " . " I'm clean bitch , I just took a shower at the shelter ". As he said that he pulls his large black cock out and shows it to me as he walks up to my window . I'm scared of this guy and know I should pull away but I sit there and stare at his black uncut cock as he rubs it on my window , he pulls back his foreskin and rubs his cock head all over showing me another wide piss slit . Why is my dick starting to swell again , fuck . " Sorry ", I yell out , " I have to go ". He stepped back and turns around and pulled down his sweats showing me a beautiful black ass , he bends over and reaches back and spreads his ass cheeks showing me his dark asshole , my god , I find it to be another sight that I can't look away from . " Come on bitch , give it a kiss ", he said as I stare as if I'm in a trance . He pulls his right leg out of his sweats and puts it up on my front fender spreading his ass wider and leans back pressing his wide open ass against my window pressing it until it's completely flat and and exposed to me like a high gloss picture right there in my face . He was making his black hole twitch on my window , it was like a suction cup , it was , it was , beautiful , my god , why do I want to kiss and suck and stick my tongue in that black hole ? Fuck , my dick is hard again and my mind is filling disgusting thoughts , I have got to get out of here . I just stare at this beautiful black hairless ass spread out in front of me and lean over and kiss the inside of my window right where his black asshole is , swirling my tongue around the glass , what the Fuck is wrong with me ? " Open the window bitch " he said as he turns around facing me , he puts his sweats back on but aims his semi hard cock towards me , " Fuck you cunt ", he yells at me . He steps back aiming his cock towards my window and let's loose with a torrent of piss . I just sit there staring wide eyed mouth opened not believing this is happening , I should be disgusted but my dick is hard at the sight of that strong stream of piss flowing from that black cock splashing into my window , I'm transfixed on it . The stream slows to a trickle , he then spits on my window pulls his sweats over his cock and again yells , " get the Fuck out of here you useless Fuck " , he looks really mad so I decided it was time to go . He flipped me off as I drove away giving one quick glance at his crotch as I see a fresh wet piss stain , he looked like he wanted to beat the crap out of me . I'm glad I'll never be back here . I could feel the cum drying on my face as I look into the mirror , wow , my face looked completely glazed with blobs on it , I looked so foolish . As I hit the freeway I finally feel safe and cannot wait to get home and shower and go find a girlfriend as I feel so ashamed , my mind swimming with what happened at the store and parking lot . Oh my God , does that make me a fag ? I had black dick in my mouth , it was just the head it but I licked and kissed and s!urped on it , I tasted the cum from it , so much of it on my face and in my mouth and it made me hard and I feel I want to do it again , do more , Fuck , I'm a queer . I look at the cum on my face in the mirror , I like it . I think of that black ass plastered against my window that black asshole in my face , I want to French kiss it , NO , stop thinking that I tell myself , think of girls and pussy . The taste in my mouth takes my mind back to black cock , I want to swallow a black guys cum , NO , stop thinking that , but my harding dick can't deny it , I'm a black cock slut ,I just don't know it yet . I think of that white guy getting throat fucked , I want a black guy to do that to me . That guy pissing on my window , I wish I had opened the window . NO , NO , NO , please no , stop thinking that , I'm not that , not a fag , fucking queers , I hate them , doesn't matter , I can't escape the thought of black cock , I'm going back . Just this once . This is my first time writing a story , some of this is true . Please let me know what you think . My return trip lead me to some crazy situations . olrvdk1329@att.net