Saturday


- JACKPOT!!! And I'm not even gonna PRETEND to feel the least bit guilty about what I did today!!! I'm feeling soooo GOOD right now! I'm tingling from head to toe, and I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs and jumping around like a toddler locked in a sugar rush right now...JUST to burn off some of this excess energy!!! I mean, my body is like...'vibrating' right now!

won't lie...a big part of me and Lee having LOTS of sex today was mostly because of Brandon and Stevie. I mean, I couldn't get it out of my head! Not even for a minute! It just kept invading my every thought! Over and over and over again. I actually had a dream last night that Lee and I walked into my school cafeteria...and I saw Brandon and Stevie, like...LAUGHING at us! Like...actually LAUGHING! And I know that it was just a stupid dream...but it really HURT, you know? Even after I woke up....my chest felt sore from the ache of knowing that my Brandon didn't care anymore. Knowing that he was probably spending this weekend, trying to find places to have long hours of hot passionate sex with Stevie! I knew Brandon's body like the back of my hand. (Hell, more like the palm!) And it made me wonder if Stevie was now exploring that same erotic terrain with his lips and tongue...his fingers touching all the sensitive areas of my ex-boyfriend's body. If he was tasting the fruit that I once tasted for myself. If Brandon whimpered and wiggled for HIM the way he used to for me. It was MADNESS! I couldn't take more than three breaths without feeling severely hurt by it.

I don't WANT some other boy getting the chance to snuggle up to the love of my whole LIFE!!! I just....ugh...it hurts so *BAD* to think that his love is so far away from me right now. So distant. Now that he's just....'gone'....I have to admit...I want him back. I REALLY want him back.

But...you know....whatever.

I'm trying really hard not to care. Because there someone out there who loves me just fine. And I didn't have to go over there, crawling on my hands and knees, BEGGING, to get a piece of it either. So...if this is goodbye to my first true love...then so be it. The more he and Stevie do it with each other, the easier it'll be to forget all about him. I don't give a fuck! I GAVE him his chance to come back to me! I DID! Stevie thinks he's gonna hold this over my head forever...but it's not gonna happen. Despite his little egotistical ramblings...I'm gonna come out of this better than ever. AND with a hotter boyfriend than I've ever had before! So fuck the two of them! He can have him. Let them get all cuddly and sweet...I don't care anymore either.

:(

I really don't. I'll bet they're not even HAVING sex right now. They're probably...like...just...

Oh who am I fooling? They're probably having sex.

But fuck it, right? Because I'm having sex too! It's not like I'm just sitting here all alone, waiting for him to give a shit about me again. I've moved on. HE'S moved on. There's nothing else to think about. I just hope he remembers who loved him FIRST...

...And that he doesn't think...you know...that it was a waste of his time...

....loving me....

ANYWAY...enough of that bullshit! TOTALLY not the highlight of my day!

So I was literally shaking myself to pieces after I woke up this morning! I mean...I didn't have a whole lot to really WORRY about after yesterday! After all the little flirtatious encounters I've had with Lee...I actually got my chance to put my mouth on that luscious boner of his and suck on it HARD! I was waiting all MORNING for him to call me so I could go over there! I took one of those 'extra' clean showers so that I would totally be ready for anything...and I mean ANYTHING...that he wanted to do to me today! Seriously! I wanted the full experience, and wouldn't settle for anything less!

So...I waited...and I waited...and I WAITED....and finally, I'm like, "What the FUCK???" You know?

So I get on the phone, and I call Lee's house, and he answers like he's 'surprised' to hear from me. I'm like, "I thought you were gonna call me today?"

And he says, "Yeah...I got scared." Which is RIDICULOUS...especially for somebody like Lee! And we both giggled a bit before I asked him if I could still come over. And he's like "Hold on a sec, ok?" And I hear him holler out to his mom, "Ma! What time are you leaving?" And she mumbles something back, and then Lee comes back on the phone, and he's like, "Wait about an hour, k? Then...you know...we'll be alone." Which is soooooo sexy when you hear Lee's voice say it!

I didn't know what to DO with myself...so I was just like, "Mmmm...ok." And I was smiling soooo wide, and Lee's voice was all soft and sensual when he said goodbye. Like he was totally WAITING for this you know?

So I went over to Lee's house exactly when he told me, and when he opened the door, I was already diamond hard in my pants!

He actually kinda smiled at my aggressive approach, stepping up to him until our crotches were almost touching. I was looking him right in his eyes, and I grinned and asked if his mom had left yet. And he's like, "Yeah. About 20 minutes ago..."

And I'm like, "Yeah? So we're alone?" And I stepped closer, to bump my hardness against his. GOD....I was SOOOOO fucking HORNY for him at that moment!!! Ahhhhhh!!!

He's like, "Maaaaybe...hehehehe!" Lee has a really cute giggle! And he looked and smelled so good! I couldn't keep my hands of of him, and he teased me a bit by moving away from me. But he eventually got hard too, and he took me by the hand to lead me into his bedroom. I was trembling inside, but I didn't DARE stop, or even slow down! Not for Lee! He's too fucking adorable to back away from. And after last time, I didn't want to waste a single moment of isolation before his mom came back home.

We kissed in the middle of his room, and my head was spinning out of control. Lee's lips are so unimaginably soft! You have no idea! I can't even find the words to express how amazing his kisses are. It's like, 75% of the whole sexual experience...just feeling his erotically moist lips against my own. And when he broke the kiss, to start getting undressed....OMIGOD!!! I got sooooo excited that I forgot to take my own clothes off! He had stripped down to his boxer brief underwear, crimson colored ones this time...he looked at me, still dressed, still mesmerized by seeing just a little bit more flesh than I'm used to when it comes to Lee...and I think he got nervous. He was like, "Billy? Dude...if this is too...'forward'...or, like..."

And I nearly shouted, "NO!!!!" And I RIPPED my pullover t-shirt off of my shoulders so fast that I nearly broke my own fucking NECK! And when I raced over to hold him again...oh WOW!!! Lee's skin is like MAGIC! Every touch was electric! Every movement was poetry! Omigod...Jimmy's depiction of him didn't even BEGIN to prepare me for the lovely tenderness of his touch. I'm surprised that I could stay conscious! And then...he reached for the waistband of his undies, and I tried VERY hard not to gasp, but I couldn't help myself! This was like...the main event here, you know? So he pulls them down, and he has the cutest little neatly arranged bush! You know? It's like...baby hair! Hehehe! And he has the cutest penis on Earth, of course! Imagine a world where one boy could have Lee's penis, Sam's heart, Brandon's eyes, Simon's brain, Bobby Jinette's ass, and everything else is Jamie Cross!!! Hehehe, wow...that boy would totally get RAPED everywhere he went! LOL!

Sorry...ANYWAY....

So I'm SPEECHLESS at the sight of seeing Lee naked for the first time! God, he's sooo HOT! And he's taking off his socks, one by one, and his balls are dangling...and I get to see his ass, which is smaller than I thought, but SO sweet and tight! And once we're both completely stripped of everything, he walk over, and he just....he holds me really close, so our bodies are touching...ut he's not kissing me or anything. He just kinda...'looks' at me. And it's like the most heart melting, most romantic look ever. I totally didn't expect that. It took me by surprise, and I kinda...got emotional over the whole thing. And finally, he leaned in, and he kissed me deeply on the lips. I fell limp in his arms, and he backed me up to lay on the bed, and he got on top of me, and we just kissed, and whimpered, and grinded into each other until our whole bodies were tingling with sexual excitement.

My mind kept wandering back to the fact that this was LEE that I was rolling around naked with. It was weird. It was like I had to keep telling myself that it was real! But every time that I really accepted the notion that one of the most adorable boys walking the face of the planet was naked and sliding his hardness up against mine while sucking on the side of my neck....I'd nearly explode and I'd have to try to hold it back. Which was hard to do...because Lee was VERY good at what he was doing to me! Just kissing ALONE was enough to cause an eruption if I didn't pause every few seconds to come up for air. Nobody kisses like Lee does. Nobody. My GOD, his lips are like...the Holy Grail of boy-lips! If only I had the words to describe what it's like to kiss and suck on them...I could put it here. But I don't...so I guess my memory of them will have to suffice, as opposed to this written record.

I remember REALLY wanting to taste him before he shot off. Or before I shot off, for that matter. Because I'm sure this building orgasm was going to cause me to pass the hell out once it leaves me. So I lightly roll Lee on his back, and I pull away from his amazing lips...but he, like, sits up, and grabs the back of my head to kiss me some more. Like he doesn't want to stop. Hehehe, it was so cute! But when I wrapped my fingers around his hardness, he closed his eyes and laid back down on his pillow, pushing his hips up into my hand. He moves really sexy, you know that? And his thighs are really smooth. I kissed my way down, and I felt some warm fluid rolling over the back of my thumb. So I licked it up, then sucked on the head of his shaft. It had the cutest little rosy blush to it. And again...that sweet taste of warm honey. So I moved my hand out of the way, and for the first time ever, I slid that delicious piece of meat into my mouth and sucked on it for all I was worth. Oh GAWD...oh....oh GAWD it was hot! The skin on his shaft, has, like, NO hair or anything on it. So it's really smooth when it slides against your tongue. And it quivers between your lips. Mmmmm...and the slit at the top is just wide enough to swipe your tongue through it. And when he rolls his hips, it's like the sexiest motion ever. Like...porn star movements! Hehehe! It was SO hot!

Then you know what he does??? He moans my name, and rubs his hand through my blond hair...and then he rolls to the side a bit, and I feel this warm, wet, sensation completely swallow my boner in one gulp! And he's REALLY getting into it, and he's squeezing my ass, and just seconds before I start passing the point of no return, he pulls me so I'm on top of him! Like, straddling his face. And I start trying to suck faster because I can't hold it any longer! I mean, my whole BODY was trembling...just trying to hold it for a few seconds longer! But he's really kneading my cheeks, and I hear him whimper, and he tastes so good, and he's making those really hot circles with his hips....and I can feel his heavy breathing from his nostrils on my balls...and I just push deep into his face and let go! I couldn't HELP it! And even while I was squirting, the thought that it was *LEE* that was swallowing my load ran through my mind and made the orgasm even WORSE! Or umm....better? Whatever!

Anyway, he's totally swallowing it, and seconds later, he stiffens up, and I hear him make the cutest noise ever, and then it throbs, and I catch a mouthful. I had to hold his legs still, just to keep him from slipping out of my mouth. Wow...he came pretty hard. By the time he was finished, he was totally spent, and we both had to just...lay in that position for a while before we could move round face to face again. The whole afternoon was just...it was amazing. Lee is AMAZING!

And we did it TWO more times after that too! Hehehe, GOD he's cute! I mean...it's different when you look at him like, 'yeah he's cute, but it's not like I can do anything about it'. Now it's like, 'he's fucking HOT AS HELL!! And I can suck any part of him any time I want to!' Hehehe!

Funny thing though...while it sounds like everything was perfect...there was ONE thing that was off. Just...I mean...it's not a big thing....

Well, we were laying there, right? And kinda talking and smiling and all. Lee is AWESOME to cuddle with naked. His hands never stop moving over your body. And he keeps giving you little kisses here and there. He knows just how to make you feel really loved, you know? So...we're talking, and with a little smile, I'm like, "You know...you should have just told me. We could have been doing this every day for the last few weeks, hehehe!"

And he's like, "Told you what? Hehehe, I always thought you were cute, I just...you know. You didn't seem like you'd be 'available', you know? I like you, Billy. I didn't wanna screw that up."

So I'm like, "So you wait until I'm drunk to take a chance? Pervert." I was totally kidding, but he gave me the weirdest smile.

He's like, "Drunk? Is this about the party?"

And I'm like, "Yeah. C'mon...you KNOW..." But he gave me this blank look. So I said, "You DO know what I'm talking about, right?"

And he's like, "Does this have anything to do with this whole 'putting you to bed' idea?" And he smiles at me, so I give him a pinch and a kiss.

And I say, "C'mon, quit screwing around. Hehehe! I know it was you."

But Lee looks at me seriously, and he's like, "Billy....um...I didn't put you to bed that night. I mean...I didn't even find out you were passed out until much later. I went looking for you, but your friend Trace said you were taken care of."

'Taken care of'? Umm...wow....

So...I mean, does this put Trace in the running for the guy who kissed me that night? I mean...does it matter? SHOULD it matter? Do I have a new boyfriend right now? And if so....am I missing out on somebody else?

I was almost TOTALLY convinced that it was Lee once he kissed me, but...if he's not the one...who is it?

I need to work this out more.

No. No, you know what? I'm gonna leave this alone. It's driving me up the wall as it is. I've got someone really hot to take Brandon's place...and that's...that's where it's gonna stop. It's good enough for me. It's BETTER than 'good enough'! It's freakin' fantastic! Not to mention that I spent the whole day having the sexiest sex EVER! So....so yeah! I'm gonna just...

Not worry about it anymore.

Who cares at this point.........right?

See ya later

-Billy

The "Kiss Mystery" List

~Brandon~

Bobby Jinette

Trace*

~Lee~

Jamie Cross*

~Simon~

~Jimmy LaPlane~

Sam

Randall*

~AJ~