Date: Thu, 28 Nov 2019 16:32:52 +0100
From: joniye@gmx.net
Subject: Hay and Straw Chapter 9: The Schism

Chapter 9
The Schism

Warning Heavy Raceplay!

I had begun living two lives. To the world, my fellow students, my family,
I was the straight, black academic with a beautiful girlfriend. But my
forbidden lust for white men kept growing and growing. I had failed
miserable in cutting Felix and the others out of my life. It was a sort of
schism between my official and my secret life. Six weeks had passed since
our return from the hay and straw class trip and our secret little games
had become a regular thing. Oftentimes we would meet at Felix's place after
school or late at night. Or at Chris' place, or somewhere
outside. Sometimes one of them would call me up to meet at a toilet stall
in the university. Sometimes we would all hang out together and things
would turn sexual. It had happened so many times by now, I lost track. Most
of the time it was either Felix or Chris, sometimes both, sometimes Ben
too. However, they all strictly assumed the dominant part during our
interactions. I was always the submissive. Always the one sucking their
dicks. Always the one getting my ass fucked. I was always the only one who
would never get off, who would never cum. It was never the other way
around. In fact, after all this time, after having had so much sex, I kind
of still considered myself a virgin, because, till this day, I hadn't
fucked anyone. I hadn't even gotten my dick sucked. All I knew was the
feeling of having white cocks in my mouth and being penetrated by them. I
felt deeply humiliated that this was the only sexual experience I knew
while the boys had received countless blowjobs from me and had dumbed load
after load into my ass.

I was still in a relationship with Jessica, but we saw less of each
other. Partly because she was learning a lot and because I was spending so
much time with the boys. She didn't suspect anything though. We still
haven't had sex. We only made out. I enjoyed the kissing, feeling her warm
body, her softness. It was so different from the rough treatment and abuse
I received from the guys. But still, something kept drawing me towards them
over and over again. And I was troubled that this thing we had had become
so regular, something quite normal. And I was worried how sex for me was
becoming inseparably entwined with abuse, humiliation and racism. And which
effects this might have on me.

Overall, we were kind of were a group again, like before hay and straw. We
met often. However, the dynamic had changed. I was at the bottom of the
hierarchy without doubt. I knew Felix, Chris and Ben were looking down at
me. I knew they saw me as inferior. They often displayed their white
supremacist convictions without inhibition. But mostly they looked down at
me, because the considered me a faggot. But I was allowed to hang out with
them. Drink beer with them. Smoke joints with them. As long as I knew my
place. And when it was time and they needed to get off, I'd suck them or
let them fuck me. Just as it pleased them.

It came to pass that we were hanging out at Chris' place on another Friday
night. Felix and Ben were there too. It was a hot summer night and they
were all just wearing boxer shorts. I was naked, as always. That has become
a given. Felix and Ben were sitting on the couch watching football while I
lying on the floor, licking their feet. I probably spend most of the time
we were together like this. Chris was on his computer, chatting with
girls. Once in a while he would show some hot chick he was talking to, to
Felix and Ben. They were stunning. I was jealous, Chris could apparently
have any girl. And in a sick way, I was proud at the same time. Proud that,
despite him being able to have any girl, I was allowed to serve his dick. I
know it sounds crazy, but this was how I felt.

Ben was rubbing his feet in my face as I heard Felix place his empty beer
can on the table. "And there goes another. Tom. Get up and get me a new
beer." I rolled to the side and got up. I had gotten used to serving them
in this way. They would never get their beers themselves anymore. They'd
just tell me to fetch them for them. I walked over to the fridge, got a
nice cold one for Felix, walked back into the room and handed it to
him. "Thanks, slave." Felix said. "Oh, and since you are here, you know how
these beers run trough. And I really don't want to get up. So..." he
unzipped his pants and pulled out his dick. I looked at him, slightly
confused. He laughed. "Seriously dude? Do I have to spell out everything
for you? Get your mouth on my dick and take my piss!" he said. My jaw
dropped. "Really?" I asked. He laughed. "Why, does it excite you? Well, I
don't care if it does or if it disgusts you. I don't want to get up, so you
will drink my piss right now. Oh and you don't want to spoil Chris good
furniture, so you better don't spill anything." He said.

I didn't say anything. I got on my knees in front of Felix, who was sitting
on the couch, legs spread apart. I submissively moved my head towards his
crotch and took his soft dick in my mouth. I kept it in there without
moving and waited. After a few moments I felt Felix releasing a stream of
warm, bitter piss in my mouth. He sighed in relief as his bladder was being
emptied. I struggled to swallow fast enough, as more and more piss was
being jetted into my mouth. I knew, if I spilled anything, they would
probably beat me up. But it was just so much piss coming from Felix'
dick. He had been drinking a lot of beer that night. "That's it" Felix
said. "You're nothing but a fucking toilet." I felt Chris and Ben watching
me, as I allowed Felix to humiliate me once again. I could feel Felix'
stream subsiding and I drank up the last gulps of piss, that were still in
my mouth. I pulled out his dick after he had stopped pissing and looked at
it. It was still a little wet, so I liked the last remains of piss off of
it. I went on licking him, hoping this could turn into a blowjob. I softly
began to suck. But Felix pushed my head aside and stuffed his dick back
into his pants. "Enough fag, you'll get my dick when I need to pee again!"
he said. Ben and Chris laughed.

"I'll have mercy on you, Tom." Chris said, turning back to his
computer. "These chicks on here have been making me crazy, my dick is
semi-hard the whole time. I'll let you suck me while I chat with these
bitches." Chris said. "Just crawl under my desk and stay there where I
don't have to look at your stupid monkey face." He said. Felix and Ben
laughed. How did they keep coming up with taunting ways to degrade and
humiliate me? And why wasn't I putting a stop to this? I had had become
such a slave for cock, that I just couldn't help it. I would endure
anything, as long as I was able to continue to suck their sweat white
dicks.

So I did as I was told, crawled underneath Chris' desk as he pulled down
his boxers, dropping them to his ankles. As this was all he was wearing, he
was now sitting naked in this chair, expect for a base cap on his head. He
looked so fucking hot. Again, I was kind of proud, that he would let my
suck his magnificent cock. Even though he wouldn't look at me while I was
doing it. Even though I'd be virtually invisible, hidden under his desk
while he was concentrating on some random hot chick. Even though I was just
a warm mouth he would feel on his dick while being complemented by who
knows how many girls, how hot, handsome and masculine he was. I still was
happy, that I would be allowed to suck that beautiful white cock of his. So
I went on, sucking his dick while he was totally ignoring me. Once in a
while he told me to suck my balls, when he felt like he was getting to
close, but didn't want to cum yet. Sometimes I could tell by myself, by
paying attention to the contractions in his dick. Then I would move away
from the head, lick his shaft or dive into his full bush of pubes and lick
the base around his cock. I could do this for hours.

"Fuck, I need to pee too." Chris said. "Just piss into the nigger's
mouth. He's already on your dick anyway" Felix responded without taking his
eyes off the TV. "You want that nigger?" Chris asked from above the desk,
not looking at me. I could only see him from his stomach below. I took his
dick out of my mouth and said "Yes, Sir." I could hear him chuckle. "Good
boy. Stop sucking me then. Just take my dick in your mouth and wait for
it." He said. I did as he said, just as I had did with Felix earlier. And
again, after a few moments, I felt Chris' piss jet into my mouth and just
as I had swallowed it from Felix and I was now drinking up Chris' piss
directly from his dick. After I had swallowed everything up I resumed
sucking his dick, which had gotten soft during the pissing. But it didn't
take long to grow hard again, thanks to my thick moist lips. I knew I had
good lips for sucking dick.

I listened as Chris was commenting on the different girls, and Felix and
Ben answering. No one asked me of course. I was feeling so ashamed. I
should be sitting next to them, one of the bros checking out chicks
together. Commenting, laughing, having fun. But that was not my place
anymore. I had been reduced to nothing more than a warm mouth under a desk,
simply providing pleasure to Chris, so he could get off. I was pulled out
of my thoughts as I suddenly heard familiar voice coming from Chris speaker
phones. Chris must have turned on the video chat. It took me a while to
fathom it, but it was Jessica.

 "Hey beautiful!" I heard Chris say. "How are you doing?" "Oh, not much and
you" she responded. "Not much either, just hanging out with my boys Felix
and Ben!" Chris said. "Is Tom with you?" she asked. "Of course not, I
wouldn't be calling you if he was here!" Chris said and I could virtually
hear that he was grinning by the way the words sounded. I was startled,
confused and hence stopped sucking him. What was going on? What business
did Chris and Jessica had video chatting with one another? I looked over to
the couch, which I could see from underneath the desk. Felix and Ben kept
watching football as if nothing was going on. As if this was somehow
normal. But what was even normal these days? I knew Chris was flirting with
all these girls. Was Jessica one of these girls? But how could that be? She
was mine! What the hell was going on? I wanted to pull myself off of Chris
dick, put he firmly pressed my head into his crotch, making me swallow his
entire shaft deep in my throat. He held me there as I was struggling to
breath. He shortly looked down at me and I nodded, signaling that I had
understood. He let go of my head and I continued sucking. Jessica
apparently didn't notice the little incident. They continued talking, and
their conversation was becoming ever more flirtatious and salacious. I knew
I had to keep on sucking Chris otherwise he would get violent on me, but I
just could not believe what was going on. I was sucking the guy who was at
the same time flirting with my girlfriend. Could this get any more fucked
up?

"It's hot today, why don't you take you top off?" Chris asked Jessica
through the video chat. "Chris, your friends are right there!" she
said. "So, didn't stop you last time" he said, laughing. "Come on, just a
little peek." He begged. "No, forget it!" she said. That's my girl, I
thought, still with Chris' cock in my mouth. "I'll show you mine if you
show me yours." He said in a coy voice. I could hear her giggle. I knew
that giggle and I hadn't heard it from her for a very long time. "Well,
okay..." she said. Okay? Okay what? I panicked. I could feel Chris big
muscular hand push me off of his dick as he was standing up, proudly
presenting his fully-erect manhood to my girlfriend. I was in shock. I
could hear Jessica giggle again. "Why are you hard?" she asked. "Cause you
are so hot! Come on, show me your perfect boobs, Baby!" Chris said into the
camera. No! Jessica is not going to show him her tits. It can't be. "Wow,
you are so gorgeous, Babe! I love how smooth your breast look!" he said. I
was panicking. But I couldn't move. I was like frozen. My heart was feeling
like it was being squeezed.

"Do you like this dick?" Chris asked. "Stop it!" Jessica said, giggling
again. "I know you do!" he said, as he began jerking it. "I know how much
you like big white cocks, Jesse!" he said and Jessica, giggling again. "I
sure do, but hush! Don't tell anyone!" she said. Chris laughed and very
briefly looked down at me cowering underneath the desk, while his muscular
tall body and his magnificent big cock were triumphantly towering over
me. "Oh don't worry, Babe, who would I tell?" he said, with an arrogant
smile. I was in complete shock.

Chris turned back to Jessica. "Jesse Baby, just looking at you makes me
wanna cum so badly!" he said. I thought girls would be disgusted by such
blatant sexualization. And Jessica usually was totally appalled by this
kind of talk. But now I could hear her speaking in a whispering tone into
the microphone. "Do it for my babe!" she said. I couldn't believe it. "Will
you do a little striptease for me?" Chris asked. "Oh, and please, sing that
sexy song while you do it." I was freaking out. What the hell was going on?
But before I had time to realize what was happening, Chris sat down again,
his dick now once more in front of my face an out of sight of the
camera. And I did the unthinkable. I grabbed his hard cock and jerked it
several times. And as I heard Jessica's sweet voice coming from the
speakers, seductively singing, knowing she had begun to strip for Chris'
eyes only, I took his white cock back into my mouth and began to suck him
off while he was watching my girlfriend's sexy body. I could not sink any
lower, I thought to myself.

"Yeah Jessie, play with your titties, just like that, you are so fucking
hot, girl" For Jessica it must have looked like Chris was jerking, because
he had his hand under the desk. But actually his hand was on my head,
reinforcing his power over me as I was sucking him off. This was so crazy:
Jessica, dancing and posing naked for him to turn him on. Me sucking his
cock to make him cum. Two black bodies, male and female, submitting to the
lust, pleasure and entertainment of this arrogant white man. "Oh baby, you
are so fucking hot, I'm gonna cum!" Chris screamed and next thing I knew,
he was unloading in my mouth. And I swallowed it desperately, hungry and
full of shame. How could I have let this happen? I should have gotten up
immediately. Stand up to him, Punch Chris in the face and claim what was
mine. But only didn't I do that. Even worse, I made Chris cum while he was
watching my girlfriend on cam. He had turned me into something like a
cuckold. And he had, beyond doubt, made me endure a new level of
humiliation I could not have imagined before.

I was still lost in my thoughts as he pulled his dick out of my mouth and
pushed me away with his right foot, making me fall over. "Good night, babe,
talk to you soon." Chris said into the camera, his lips forming a kiss.
"Good night, handsome." I heard Jessica giggle and then I could hear her
log off. Everyone bursted out in laughter immediately. "Dude, I can't
believe you did that. That was a little cruel, even for my taste." Felix
said. Chris laughed. "It's not like I planned this." He said. "Hey Tommy,
sorry about that, but your girlfriend is just so fucking hot." He said to
me. I was still in shock. I slowly stood up and held on to the desk. "I
can't believe this." I stuttered. "Dude, sorry man, I know this was kind of
sick. I guess you must be hurting now and shit. But, if it's any
conciliation, it was fucking awesome for me!" Chris laughed. Ben shook his
head. I was shacking. I was overwhelmed by what had just happened. My two
neatly separated worlds got mixed together in a complete mess. I felt the
schism breaking. I felt like everything was falling apart under the
arrogant laughter of these white boys. My head was spinning, I was drowning
in confusion, as the sound of Ben's voice and his zipper opening suddenly
pulled me out of my thoughts. "Yo slave, get on my dick, gotta piss!"