Date: Thu, 15 Dec 2016 02:19:05 +0000 From: Harry Scott Hayden Subject: "It Has Always Been You" - Chapter 29 - Contemplating @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ A disclaimer: This story is fictional. Some of the things that happened or will happen to Michael and Nick. Parts of the characters are fictional as well. All other characters were made up and any similarities are just coincidental. This is a gay romance between teenage boys, there may be sex, but for the most part, it's about their true love of each other so if that offends you, please discontinue reading. Also, if it is illegal for you to read such material, you have been warned. I hope you're enjoying it and that the story draws you in wanting more. If you have any suggestions or concerns, do not hesitate to email me at harryscotthayden@outlook.com Thoughts and suggestion are always welcome and may or may not be implemented. Concerns will be considered and addressed as much as possible. AND, if you enjoy the stories on Nifty.org, please give a donation to help cover their expenses. While the site is currently free, donations only from loyal fans can help keep it that way. Any amount will help. @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ Waking up on a Sunday morning, feeling drained of his emotion, Mikael did not have the strength or energy and even making any effort to get up from his bed and live his life as he normally did. His body energy was depleting away from his body and he felt so lifeless. It was all due to the effect of unforeseen emotional turmoil, that had happened to him the day before. He was dumbfounded with what Nick had done to him and had looked at every single angle of their so called relationship, if they ever have one, where did it go wrong and where does it lead to. He knew where he wanted it to be and had been trying to fulfill it to his fullest abilities. Was he asking too much of Nick? What he wants, was for Nick to be truthful and sincere with him in regard of what did he really means to Nick. He had loved Nick honestly and truthfully, but with Nick, it took a turn for an indecisive behavior which deepens the cut and agony to Mikael heart and feelings. Mikael mind was kind of messed up, as he had thought that everything was doing fine after they had a heart-to-heart talk and sealed it with heavy make out session on the couch in the living room. Promises were made between them as they would not want to have any more problems, complication and anticipation in sorting out the path of their love life and for them to be together. They were sure of what they wanted and had vow to make it happen by actually working out of any possibilities on making it a reality. They both knew it would be tough and would not be easy, but they are thrilled to make it and try to resolve any discrepancy like any adult would do. But all seems to have gone hay-wired after the other day commotions. He felt so disappointed and heart broken with the way Nick had betrayed him. He had always doubted of Nick sincerity, since the day they had made promises to each other. With all that had happened, it made him realize that he was not loved at all. Nick had played him very well indeed. All that thoughts and assumptions were what his mind had wanted him to think and feel. As yet, his heart had a different perception and views with all that had been going on. Mikael will never know why did Nick do this to him after all the sacrifices he had done for Nick. Lots of times he had shed tears down his cheeks longing for Nick to love him truthfully. Will he ever felt regret of meeting Nick in the first place? Is it wrong for him to fall in love with Nick at all? Why did he feel so hard for Nick? He never felt this way towards anybody throughout his high school, not until the day he met Nick in the school office. Mikael was sure that Nick is someone special that had caught his attention intentionally. He was not sure why was he still be here standing, waiting for Nick to love him. Definitely not sure why was Nick still be there standing at all, if his intention was only to hurt him, day and night. Mikael tried to understand and maybe had to accept that his love for Nick, had been taken for granted and he was used, over and over again by Nick. It was totally unfair on Mikael's part. Mikael had thought that Nick had totally forgotten about their impending date that day, and without Nick be known or realizing it, Nick was hurting him. If he was just strong enough, he would like to go away forever from Nick, as he knew Nick would be happy without him for the rest of Nick's life. Whatever to how he feels, Mikael still could hear Nick's father, Mr. Cornelly, words to him. Let Nick explained to why and what made him do what he did to Mikael, before Mikael could take whatever action warranted. Other people might wonder, why does Mikael be so caught up with Nick. Looking at Mikael situation, he might as well just flip Nick on his back, and fuck the shit out of him. Then just ignore him for one or two weeks and just see how Nick would react and feel to that. Nick deserved to be taught a lesson and to taste his own medicine. Only then he would realize how heart wrenching to be hurt like the way Mikael was feeling at that moment. Would Mikael have the strength, the courage or even the hearts to do that to Nick? The one person who has the abilities to capture Mikael's heart to love? Ever since he was outed of his sexuality, he had been brazen to every snicker, jeers and names calling with an open mind. Not even Jason, his so called bully, could ever bring him down anymore. As an outspoken person as he is, he still has a soft part in his beings when it comes to Nick. Nick had impacted him so much and not even Drake could make him feel that way. He felt so mellowed and sad thinking about it. Prior to that, he had forced himself up to wake up from his bed and took a well-deserved refreshing shower and make himself clean and fresh, to face the day. After getting himself dressed up with a simple cargo pants and a white tee shirt, he went down to have breakfast. He was going to be alone all day as his father had to work. He was moping while eating his breakfast. Once eaten, he washed his plate, cup and utensils and then went to the living room to watch some television. He was not really watching any particular show on the television as his mind was still, contemplating with what was going on yesterday that had made him confused about Nick action and reaction. He had so much wanted to confront Nick so badly, as he kept on asking himself why was he loving Nick so much. Even though, he already knew Nick character was like that towards him for the first time they make love. Is Nick was pretending to be in love with him and was expertly playing with his words just to make him sound convincing? He was really getting caught with all of Nick. As much as he tried to out focused himself away from Nick, the memories of the good times they had spent together was making him to smile. He could not help himself when tears started to develop in his eyes and as much as he tried to prevent it from falling on his cheeks, the overwhelming feelings of sadness that was within him cannot be contained anymore. Slowly, droplet by droplet of teardrop's falls gently down his handsome face. His thoughts, feelings, emotions were directed at Nick. He wanted to hate Nick so bad, but at the same time he was longing for Nick love and embraced. He was not sure for how long he had been sitting on the sofa in the living room, just sitting there staring at the television while his mind was working extra hard. Nonchalantly, he was snapped from his daydreamed and moping, when his front door was pounded vigorously. He wondered who could it be, banging on his door at this time of day. It could not be his father, as he has his own keys to open the door. Lazily he stood up from the couch, wipe off any tears, stain from his eyes and cheeks, and proceeded to walk in a zombie like manner to the front door. He opened it gently when he felt the door was swung pushed hard and someone came rushing in and grabbed him into a tight hug while sobbing on his shoulder. He was shocked when he realized it was the person he hated most yet he was deeply in love with........ NICK! @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I have created a mailing list. If you would like to be added to it and to be informed of new submission, please contact me at harryscotthayden@outlook.com . Please let me know that you read it on nifty.org . @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@