Date: Wed, 18 Jun 2008 17:18:15 -0700 (PDT) From: Seth Barton Subject: Mourning_Sex {{DISCLAIMER}} This work is not to be reproduced (copied, edited, etc.) in ANY manner without EXPRESS WRITTEN CONSENT from the author, under penalty of LAW and EXTREME GUILT If it is ILLEGAL to read and or posses the following material for you, be it age (18, eighteen, ate teen), or is forbidden by your locality, you should direct your eyes to the BIG RED X in the upper right-hand corner of your screen and CLOSE THE WINDOW. You should also do the above mentioned if you are offended by such material. But if you meet the stated requirements for reading this, please do :) The following is a manifest of truth and fiction. Any resemblance to the characters may (or may not) be coincidence. {{Mourning Sex}} The mid morning sun seeped through the shades as I was awoken by a weight on my chest. My eyes slowly opened, scanning the room. As my gaze drifted downward, a large smile crept across my face. I could feel a hand slowly running down my side. "Morning sexy" my companion said, still mostly asleep "Good morning" I replied, stretching a slightly. "How'd ya sleep?" "Pretty damn good" he whispered as he lifted his head, looking at me with a sleepy gaze. I continued smiling as I rubbed the back of his head, trailing down his neck to the center of his back. As the rest of my body woke up, I could feel everything, and by the feel of things, we were both very naked. OH... I suppose I should explain how we got to this point ^_^' Firstly, a quick intro to the main characters involved. Hello! I'm Joe, a senior in high school. I'm 18, 6' 4", 187 lbs. I've got grayish eyes, short black hair, and lighter toned skin. I'm in alright shape, nicely defined from playing soccer, but my stamina is shit cause I smoke like a chimney haha. Despite that, I try to work out regularly to stay in the shape I'm in. Pretty much the average teen trying to escape and start anew. I'm Bisexual, but prefer guys because they don't do the PMS bullshit. Next up: Ben. A junior this year, 17 years old, 6' 3", 190something lbs. He has bright blue eyes, and shaggy brown hair, and about the same skin tone as me. He's a bit more defined than I am, due to him being in three sports (Soccer, wrestling and track) opposed to my one. Very nice figure in general, and on top of that, he's fuckin' HOT. There are too many things to say in this forward of sorts, so just assume he's pretty much perfect for arguments sake :) Followed by... Doug. My brother of no relation. He's been residing at my place after the subsequent divorce and death (in that order) of his parents. He decided to stick around to finish school with the ones that cared about him, opposed to his hellish grandparents. He's also a senior this year. 17, 5'11", he has short brown hair, which is always in a mohawk, and deep green eyes. He's my partner in crime in all things. We're co-captains of the soccer team, and are nearly identical in other things. He's a bit more high strung than me though. Then there's Dan and Tony, the Terror Twins. Not actual twins mind you, but they might as well be. They're both 18, Tony's a bit taller at 6'5", but Dan makes up the difference by being carved out of stone. We're convinced they were separated at birth, seeing as their birthdays are 2 days apart. They both keep their hair longer, both about the same shade of brown, about chest length. They're eyes are the same shade of slate blue, and their physical attributes are very similar. It's quite eerie catching them in the right light. This tale begins in the past, my sophomore year to be exact, so get a drink and enjoy. {{THE PAST}} I pushed my sunglasses up my nose as I stepped out of my cousin's car. "Oh good... sophomore year..." I thought as we reluctantly shuffled into the building. I pushed open the main doors to find a swaying mass of people gathered near the entrance. With a sigh, I cut through the crowd to the commons and waited for the first bell. I took an empty seat, and a few minutes passed before I felt hands on my shoulders. I turned my head to find Dan and Tony standing over me. "Heya" They said in unison. (It's really creepy, cause they do that all the time, without thinking about it!) "Hey guys, how's it going?" I asked, spinning in my chair to face them. "Could be better...you know...not being here" Dan said in his usual monotone as Tony nodded in agreement. "Seen the girls yet?" I continued, casually looking around. They were the only ones of the opposite sex I enjoyed talking to. "No sign of them yet, maybe they were smart and stayed home" Tony said. "Nah... they're parents would snuff them if they skipped" Dan added coldly. "Very true" Tony said, dropping into the seat next to me. Not two seconds had passed since mentioning them, and they appeared behind Dan. Cassi and Heather, the best example of best friends you'd find on earth. Cassi coolly wrapped an arm around Dan's waist as Heather took a seat next to Tony. "No Dougy today?" Heather asked in her bubbly tone, looking over all of us one at a time. "He's here somewhere...he was out of the house by the time I woke up." I said, leaning backwards on my seat. "So how'd that party go- OH MY GOD KNOCK IT OFF YOU TWO!!" Heather shouted at Dan and Cassi. They'd been friends with benefits since about 7th grade, and Heather was annoyed by this fact. All of us, save for Heather, grinned at this as the first bell began to blare. With a group sigh, we all stood up and began to shuffle into the gym. We took the long way into the gym, to avoid the mass of people. But in doing this, we had to walk past the freshmen. I looked them over as we made our way up the bleachers. "There sure are a lot of them" I muttered under my breath. "Agreed" Dan and Tony said in sync and the girls giggled. I kept scanning the new blood as we kept moving up, until my eyes locked with one of them. I stopped dead in my tracks and Tony ran into me. I zoned out looking at him until Tony brought me back to reality. I shook my head a few times and shot the kid another glance. He responded by cocking and eyebrow and looking away quickly. "You ok?" Tony asked, tapping me on the shoulder. "Yeah...yeah...I'm fine" I replied, regaining my wits. We took our seats near the top and settled in for the mind numbing assembly. It some how turned into a failed pep rally, if anything, it lowered our moral about being there, not raised it. After who knows how long, we were released to our classes under a shortened schedule. The day seemed to blur. Same shit, just more of it. Until German I. I had dropped Latin because of the mostly insane teacher, and, who speaks in a dead tongue? Dead people, that's who. I took a seat in the back of the room and prepared myself for more boring introductions. My eyes began to wander about as the teacher began to babble. "Don't know that one... Or that one... I think I saw him at Taco Bell the other day... all these freshmen..." I thought to myself as I continued looking around. "!! It's that kid again" Our eyes locked again. I slyly cracked a grin, making him turn a bit red and look away quickly. The rest of the class went on without incident, other than me stealing a few glances at the unnamed kid who kept looking back. "Not bad looking" I thought as the bell rang. I slowly gathered myself and waited for the herd to move out of the room. I noticed the guy had the same idea as me and stayed behind to avoid the mad rush for the door. Before making my exit, I shot him one last glance and headed out. Walking down the hall, I was quickly lifted into a bear hug by Dan. "What's your next class Joe?" he asked, squeezing the air out of me. "Gym" I gasped as he released his hold on me. "Excellent, mine too" he said, throwing an arm over my shoulder. We made our way to the gym, complaining about how much our classes sucked and how lame gym was going to be. Entering the locker room, we took an empty bench, where minutes later, Tony appeared. We were given the standard "This is what we'll be doingblahblahblah" for the first 20 minutes then were released to the gym for the remaining time to hang out. "Gah... there he is again" I muttered. "Hmm? Who?" Dan asked. "That kid" I responded, pointing at the guy I had kept looking at in German class. "He's one of the new kids on the soccer team" Doug said, manifesting behind me. "He's the one you took out yesterday in that slide tackle" "That was HIM? Damn... must've hit my head harder than I thought" I shook my head, trying to remember, but nothing came to mind. "So how was your day Dougy?" I asked, leaning into him. "Blah. Could be worse I suppose." He replied "We don't have any classes together" I said, frowning a bit "I know I know. No good" He sighed, dropping his head on my shoulder. "But whatever, you going to practice?" "Yeah, coach wants me to `set a good example' or something" I said, rolling my eyes "No one could set a better example... Hell, look at the varsity team this year, a bunch of morons." He replied with a laugh. "Yessir" I said, laughing a bit as well. "But I think we should split gym early, to `set a good example' Doug said slyly. "I completely agree." With that, we left the gym. On the way out, I shot another grin at the unknown kid, once again causing him to turn red again. On the way to the soccer locker room we talked about what classes we had, and the fact we didn't even have lunch together. We shot the breeze for awhile in the locker room, changing slowly, killing as much time as possible. The others began to filter in, and practice went off without a hitch. Returning to the locker room I quickly stripped down and took a shower. I was supposed to meet Tony afterwards to get a ride home. As I returned to my locker to get dressed, I felt to make sure my lucky necklace was still on... and it wasn't. I grumbled as I shuffled back to the shower in my shorts, scanning the floor for my necklace. "AH-HA!"I proclaimed as I spotted my chain on the floor. I quickly slid over to it and knelt down t snag it. I caught some feet out of the corner of my eye and decided to see who it was. I stood up slowly, taking in the sight. "Nice legs... not a bad ass either" I thought as I continued to stand. As I stood all the way up, the person turned around. "!" It was the unnamed guy I'd been seeing all day. He looked at me somewhat confused. "Uhh... Hey there" I said, trying my best not to look down. "Hello" he replied nervously. "I'm Joe. Nice to meet you" I said "I'm Ben, you're in my German class" He responded. "Yep yep... Sorry for destroying you in practice the other day" I said, laughing slightly. "Ah don't worry about it" He laughed, extending a hand. "Well, see ya around I guess" I said, shaking his hand. As I turned to leave, I snuck a peek... and damn. All I can say is, nice. I returned to my locker and quickly got dressed and split for the parking lot, looking for Tony. He waved me down and I ran over to his car. He's slightly older than me, and got his license before me. AND, his parents bought him a decent car! The ride home was good, went on about our respective sports for a bit before making a quick stop at Taco Bell. Got some crappy tex-mex and blasted some metal through down town. After arriving at my house, we hung out for awhile, blankly stared at the TV and emptied the house of Pepsi. It was coming around 9 pm and Tony had to leave, so we said our goodbyes and I retreated to my room for the remainder of the night, where I passed out watching Tales from the Crypt on the SCREAM network. (Yes, such a thing exists). My alarm went off at 6, and I groggily sat up. "Son of a... Day two, commence" I groaned as I rolled out of bed and proceeded to the bathroom. I walked into the bathroom to find Doug brushing his teeth. "Morning" I yawned as I slid past him to the toilet. He spit in the sink and smiled back at me through the mirror. I sighed heavily as I took a piss. "How'd ya sleep?" he asked, reaching for his hair gel. "Pretty good I guess. What time did you get back?" I asked, putting my dick back in my boxers. "About one I'd say. I watched some of those Crypt episodes. How didn't you wake up? I thought I had it pretty loud" He replied, effortlessly forming his Mohawk. "Didn't hear a thing" I said, reaching into the shower and turning the dial to hot. I threw back the curtain, dropped my shorts, and hopped in the shower. "Oh yeah, Dan called while you were asleep" Doug shouted over the curtain. "I'll see him today, don't worry about it" I shouted back. "Ok, I'll see you at school then bro" I stuck my arm out of the shower and gave him the thumbs up as he walked out. I quickly lathered up and had a quick jerk off session. Even though we didn't share a room, we usually slept in my room. I came rather quickly, cause I hadn't jerked in a few days. I stood there in the post orgasm glow for a while, letting the water wash me off slowly. With a heavy sigh, I stepped out of the shower and toweled off, brushed my teeth, ran some gel through my already messy hair, and slid my boxers back on. I walked back to the room and flicked on the light to find Dan leaning on the wall. ". . . " ". . . " I narrowed my eyes in the silence. He did the same. ". . . And?" I asked, casting him a cold stare "Get dressed, we're going to breakfast." He stated, pushing himself off the wall "Uhm... Why?" I responded, walking over to the dresser. "Because it's your birthday tomorrow, and I won't be around" he answered "Hurry up, the girls are waiting" I rolled my eyes and groaned as I pulled out some clothes and threw them on. "Doug going too?" I asked as I poked my head through my hoodie. "He just went out for his run" Dan said, leaning on the door frame, crossing his arms. "And we have a new accomplice" he continued with a hint of devious in his voice. I cocked an eyebrow as I slid into my shoes and made for the stairs. As I reached the bottom, I saw Cassi, Heather, and Tony, talking with my mom. "Good morning!" they all said in unison. I groaned as I shuffled toward the door with the rest of them not far behind. "Got the SUV today" Tony said smugly. "It's nicer than your car" Cassi added, opening the passenger side door. "And we can all fit in it comfortably" Dan opened the back door for me and I slid onto the seat, dropping my head slightly. "You all know I'm not a morning person" I said with a large yawn "Yes, but we're all busy after school, and I leave after football today" Dan pouted. I sighed as I moved toward the window, but was blocked by something. Looking over to see what was in the way, I twitched as it registered who it was. "So... stealing young boys again Cassi?" I asked in a sly tone "Hm? OH! HAHAHA! That's Ben-" "Yes, I know who he is" "He's my cousin, he moved here a few weeks ago." She added. "I just want him to make good friends, cause he doesn't really have any yet" "I see I see..." I trailed off, looking him over. He's quite the looker, even asleep. All the talking woke him up. He sat straight up and looked around like he was somewhere he wasn't supposed to be. His eyes locked with mine and a look of utter confusion swept across his face. "Morning Ben" I said with a cheeky grin "Uh...Hi" he replied, still looking confused. "And... uhh... HAPPY BIRTHDAY...TOMORROW!" I smiled again and patted him on the shoulder as Tony pulled out of the driveway. I nodded off on Dan's shoulder for a bit until he shrugged me off when we arrived. "C'mon, we're here" We all piled out of the vehicle and stretched. As we started towards the door, I deliberately slowed my pace to walk next to Ben, casting him a sideways glance a few times before we got in the building. "Mmm... Perkins..." I said in a sarcastic tone. It was a better option than Mc Plagueriddens, but not for my wallet. As we were seated, the rest of them scrambled for seats, leaving the two on the end for Ben and myself. I narrowed my eyes, looking over them before leaning over to Ben. "I think it's a set up" I whispered in his ear. He nodded in agreement as we both shot sharp glares at Cassi. She returned her usual bubbly smile and we both face palmed at the gesture. A few minutes of idle chatter went on before the waitress brought us menus, and we all quickly decided on what to have. Standing up, I motioned for Cassi to follow me out of earshot. "So...this is a set up...yes?" "Well... no... yes... God I don't know. Like I said, he just moved here, and doesn't have any friends" She huffed, looking at me funny. "And, he has a huge crush on you" "What" "Mhm mhm" "How do you-" "I'm the cousin, I know everything" "Heh... clearly" "Could you at least give him a chance? He hasn't stopped talking about you since the first time he saw you." "Serious?" "Yeeeeep... He's crushing on you hard" "Well, uhh... Ok. But, I'd like to see if we even get along first, ya know?" "Oh that's alright, just... be nice, ok? I'd have to kill you if you hurt him" We both grinned at the remark... hers was a bit more serious though. She can be more intimidating than the terror twins combined at times. We walked back to the table just as our food was arriving. As I retook my seat, I inched closer to Ben, much to Cassi's delight. Everyone else clearly knew her plan. As I looked around, I kept catching the rest of them looking at us approvingly. Random chatter went on as we ate; not really wanting to go to school, but the clock was ticking. The past summer was busy for all of us. The girls went to Australia for some church group thing. They were gone for a month or so, leaving the Terror Twins and Doug around for me to hang out with. When Dan and Tony weren't working or hanging out with us, they locked themselves in Tony's basement and taught themselves how to play guitar. That left Doug and me to sit around most of the summer and do loads of nothing. We took to drinking, and, being only sophomores, we were inexperienced, making for many long nights. We decided not to be too late on the second day, so we threw some money on the table and prepared to leave, that is, until the server brought out something that resembled a muffin, with 16 candles on it. "Aww...You guys rock." I said with a laugh. All they did was laugh before singing an extremely loud version of Happy Birthday, loud enough where the rest of the place looked at us. It was a better start to the day then I ever would have expected. We all piled back in the SUV and quietly digested on the way to school. The rest of the day went along uneventfully. The only major difference, on my part anyways, was paying more attention to Ben. I snagged him at lunch and introduced him to a few more people, and found out a lot more about him. Over the next two years, we became nearly inseparable. On some level, we clicked. And it was great. The summer before my junior year, we started going out, not really caring who noticed or not. {{The Present}} We had just won the season's first soccer tournament and were returning to school. As I stepped off the bus, adjusted my shades as I walked to my car, really wanting to get home. I got to my car, and was shoulder tackled by Ben. "Joe, check your phone" he said, putting me in a bear hug. "Easy killer...I can't really do that with you holding me up" I said as he dropped me back to my feet. After digging in my pockets for my keys, I opened the passenger side door and popped open the glove box. I glanced over at him as I snagged my phone "You alright?" I asked, noticing the look of confusion on his face. "Just check your phone" He said with a hint of nervousness in his voice. "I got a few messages, but they're all staticy" I fell into the seat as I flipped open my phone and twitched at the long list of the things I missed. Two texts from Dan, one from Tony, and three calls from mom. "What could you make out from you messages?" I asked, nervously. "Uhm... Sounded like `Come Home', but I don't officially live at your house yet" He said with a laugh "Hmm...Lets go." I said, sliding over the center console and starting the car. "Any ideas?" Ben asked, breaking the silence. "Not a damn thing" I answered, biting at my lower lip. The ten minutes seemed to take forever as the sense of urgency crept in. "...Ben" I said, my voice unsteady. "Yeah bud, what's up?" He replied, looking casting his usual warm gaze on me. "Just so you know..." I stopped myself, trying to choose the right words. "I love you... I've been meaning to say that for awhile now...I just haven't had the balls to say it" There weren't really any other words to say it. "I love you too Joe" he said, putting a hand on my shoulder. I glanced over at him and smiled. "It'll be ok, I've got your back no matter what" "That means a lot... Thanks Ben" I said as we pulled into my driveway. As I ripped the key from the ignition, I felt Ben's arm slide over my shoulder as he pulled me into a hug. "Whatever happens, I'm here for you Joe" I sighed as I buried my face into his neck "Don't worry, it'll be alright." I didn't want him to let go. Ever. The feeling I was getting was degrading into something awful. If only knew how awful it would be. I slowly opened the door, preparing for what all the fuss was about. Ben had an arm around me the whole time from when we got out of the car. As the door opened, it revealed a collection of people gathered in the kitchen. Namely, Tony, Dan, My parents, and a few of Doug's friends. It was relatively quiet save for the muffled sobs of Doug's ex girlfriend. "Ok... What's all this about?" I asked, my level of annoyance and fear skyrocketing. Dan and Tony simultaneously slid over and attached to me and Ben. Dan whispered the news to me, and I nearly choked. "Joe... Dougy died" It was a good thing they were all standing there, or I would've collapsed. My knees got all shaky, my vision went kinda blurry, and I felt like I wanted to puke. Those words kept repeating in my head as I stumbled to my room. I sat down on my bed and they quickly surrounded me. Tony and Dan on my sides, and Ben kneeling in front of me. They kept talking at me, but I couldn't really hear what they were saying over the destructive words on repeat in my head. After all the noise in my head had stopped, I realized what was going on as I fought back the tears stinging at the back of my eyes. I blankly looked at Ben, and he instantly hugged me. I'd never felt more destroyed in my life. One of my few constants was gone, and it fucking hurt. "He doesn't look so good" "No he doesn't" "What's the plan...you two are older, you've gotta know something about this" "Nope, not a thing" "Sorry, this is a first for us too" "God I feel worthless...some boyfriend I am" "Hey...knock that off, you're a good boyfriend. He's been a lot happier since you two have been together... And, we wouldn't allow anyone else to be with him" "Serious?" "We don't joke about that sort of thing... He's kinda really important to us" "Maybe...we should give them some alone time? Eh Dan?" "Sounds like a plan, for now, I'll call you later Ben" "Ok, talk to you then I guess" With that, Tony and Dan left us alone. As I heard the door close, Ben pushed me backwards, laying me out on the bed. "Joe... c'mon... say something" Ben whispered in my ear as he laid down next to me, sliding an arm under me and pulling me on top of him. I tried to get out all the words that were swarming around in my head, but I couldn't. All I could do was fucking cry. I once again buried my face in his neck as his hands ran up and down my back. He tightened his hold on me as time went on. A while later, mine and Ben's mom popped in the door. "You boys ok?" My mom asked, sitting down next to me. "Could be better" Ben replied, wiping the tears welling at his eyes. "Well, we're taking the kids out to dinner, you two want to come along?" she asked, rubbing my back. "Not really feeling to social" He said as I nodded in agreement. "Ok then. We'll see you later then" Before they left, Ben's mom came over and gave us both a big hug, trying to console us in any way possible. Her heart was in the right place, but to be honest, it meant nothing. She's a bitch. "I'm telling you now mom, I'm staying with him till he feels better" Ben said in a commanding tone "But what about-" "No, I don't care, he's what's important to me" He said, hugging me tighter. She let out a heavy disapproving sigh as they left the room. "Ben..." "Yeah?" "I love you" "Love you too Joe, love you too." After a few minutes of silence, Dan slid in the door with a sly grin on his face. "Come downstairs" he said with a devious tone. "Hmm...no. I don't trust that grin" Ben said mockingly. "Just do it before I drag you down there by your toes" He said, narrowing his eyes. "Fine fine fine... whatever." "You too Joe" I groaned in response as we sat up. I shot a glance at Dan as he held the door open for us. Rolling my eyes I reluctantly got up and went down stairs with Ben close behind me. Walking into the living room, I found Tony sprawled out on the couch, with five shot glasses on the coffee table. He sat himself up as we all entered the room. "I see five...but there are only four" I muttered as I sat down next to him. "You know who it's for" Tony replied, leaning on me. "But you're drinking for two tonight" "Heh...suits me fine" I said, eyeing the glasses "So, what's in them" "Three guesses" "Looks light-ish...Beam" "No" "Mr. Daniels?" "Wrong" "Captain?" "Nope" "I give...what is it" "Apple Pie" "... Shut the fuck up, where did you get your hands on some" For those of you that don't know what it is, imagine a 180 proof shot... that tastes like apple pie. Not the slightest taste of alcohol what so ever. And from that, you can gather that it gets quite dangerous drinking it, seeing as you forget rather quickly that you're drinking damn awesome moonshine. "I asked your dad before they left, he had no objections" "Bastard was holding out on us... Doug wanted some last weekend" "well, he has all he wants now, we can be sure of that" After that, it was quiet for a bit and Ben sat down next to me, sliding a hand around my waist. I eyed the shots as Dan threw in a CD. I winced a bit as the first song started to play. "Of all the stuff I have...you picked this..." I said, dropping my head. "Seemed...right I suppose." He replied, glancing over the case. "Isn't this-" "Likferd... Burial in Norwegian" I sighed. "It IS fitting though..." "Yes...but...Damnit" I buried my face in my hands "Leave it on" "You sure?" "Yeah" We all slowly reached for a glass as the song came to an interlude. Looking at one another, we raised our glasses as the song began to build up again "For one of the best guys on earth... Besides us that is" Dan said in an awful toast "Hahaha... Glad to see your ego hasn't been effected by this" Tony smirked as we clinked our glasses together. "To Doug, and to us" The song fell into utter chaos (as most of their songs do) as we all knocked back the shots at once. We thought about it for a second before we all looked at the one remaining glass. "Joe should drink it" "Hell yeah he should" "Do it" "You just wanna get me drunk don't you" "You need to loosen up bro" "A few more of these and I'll be quite loose...wow...that sounded dirty" We all broke out laughing as the CD kept going on full. After we settled down a bit, I grabbed Doug's shot off the table and looked at it for a second. The last bit of daylight shot through the blinds as I downed it. The night went on, and after about half the bottle of apple pie, we decided to turn to something less... potent. Namely, the bottle of cheap whiskey my dad likes. We had a few mixers, told a few stories, and hung out like we hadn't all summer. As the night was wrapping up, the parents returned and gave Dan and Tony rides home. "Joe lets go to bed" Ben slurred, slumping onto my shoulder. "That sounds great" Throwing my arm over his shoulder, I slowly stood us up and wobbled over to the stairs. The room was spinning slightly, but I didn't really mind it. Making our way to the top of the seemingly infinite stairs, we nearly tripped over each other getting through my door. I sat him down on my bed and swayed over to my dresser to empty my pockets. I threw my wallet on top and suddenly felt arms around me. "I'm sorry" he whispered, dropping his head onto my shoulder. "For? I don't remember you fucking anything up ever" I said, whipping my belt out of my jeans "About Doug... and being a shitty boyfriend" "Shut up, you rock. I know it, you know it, Dan and Tony know it. Hell, my PARENTS know it." "..........." I turned around and looked him straight in the eyes. I put my arms around him hugged him. "It's ok. Not right now, but eventually it will be. And, you're an awesome boyfriend." I leaned in and kissed his forehead and smiled. "A damn cute one too" He sadly looked at me as I walked him backwards to the bed. He was hurt more than he was letting on. His eyes were telling me all the things he wanted to say but didn't. Dropping next to him, I slid my shirt off and threw it across the room. He leaned over and buried his face in my neck as he started crying. My boy was hurt, and it hurts just as much to see him like that. Putting my arms around him, I laid him down and rolled him on top of me, rubbing his sides. "It'll be ok" I said, tightening my hold. "But for now, let's sleep, cause we both need it. Good night Ben, love you" {The Next Day} "One...Two...Three" We were ripped from our comfortable position and stood up. As my eyes shot open and things came into focus, Dan and Tony were holding us up. My mini hangover kicked in as my balance steadied and I put my hands to my eyes, blocking the light. "What the FUCK" we both groaned in unison "We're going swimming. Think of it as a little party" "No more parties" Ben said, falling back on the bed "How are you two even walking right now...you drank more than we did" "Clockwork liver" Tony said with a chuckle. "Get dressed, we're supposed to be there in like twenty minutes" "Who's all going, and why are we" I hissed, sitting back down on the bed. "The girls, Corey, Tristan, Ashley, and some other assorted people" Dan said. "Assorted? How assorted, oh, and, what time is it" I said, still holding my head. "It's 12:17. And you'll have to find out, the girls set this up" "Oh good...give us a minute" "We'll be downstairs" I stood up and looked around as they shuffled out the door. Sometime during the night I lost my pants, and Ben lost everything but his briefs. My eyes scanned the scattered clothes as I tried to remain standing. I looked back at Ben and smiled seeing he fell back to sleep, or at least looked like it. "I don't think they'll leave until they know we're going" I said groggily, sitting down next to him. All he did was groan and roll over, putting his head in my lap, making himself more comfortable. "Please don't hit me with your vicious morning wood." He said sleepily. I grinned at his comment, flexing slightly, making my hardon nudge the side of his face. The way it was positioned, it was about to pop out the leg of my boxers. I glanced over at his crotch to find he was in the same condition. I ran a hand down his side and dig a few fingers into the waistband, slowly moving it to his stomach and stroking the trail of hair leading downwards with my thumb. "Shame we don't have the time" he said with a chuckle. "Yeah it is, but let's get ready. Need some shorts?" "Yeah and clothes in general. I was sweating really bad last night, and would rather not smell like whisky and BO" "Haha ok" Slowly standing up, Ben pulled me with him and we went over to my dresser to find something to wear. I pulled out two pairs of board shorts and tossed one over his shoulder as he dug through my clothes. He looked over at me and ran his hand over my cheek, rubbing the stubble. "Could use a shave there Joe" "Jealous?" I asked in a mocking tone. He grinned and stuck his tongue out at me before walking off to the bathroom. {Later On...} I squinted as I stepped out of my car. Being more hung over of the two of us, I had Ben drive us to the beach. It was nice and quiet due to the lack of moronic tourists. I scanned over the beach. It was warm that day, and a few local families were out enjoying the beach, something they probably didn't do all summer. As my eyes continued to wander, I found a familiar group of people a ways down the beach in the shade of some trees. As we approached, I was nearly taken out by Tristan. Tristan's my true rival on the soccer team. Where as Doug was more of a brotherly push now and then. I've known him since second grade, and we've always tried to out do each other in EVERYTHING. "Mr. Joe, how's it going" he said, catching my fall. "Meh... you know...could be better" I replied, steadying myself. He took me out of earshot and nearly broke down. I'd never seen Tristan like this. He was always the one with the brave face. His explosion of sorts shocked me. "But enough about me, how are you really doing buddy... you were a lot closer than I was" "Well, to be honest, really fucking shitty. I really didn't want to come today." "That's understandable. How's Ben doing?" "This is a first for him too, so it's a bit rough" "Yeah... It sucks. But you're lucky you have Ben and Dan and Tony." He said, lowering his voice and hanging his head. "You have Corey... don't you?" He looked at me with a glare that could bring down buildings. I literally took a step back at his response. I cocked an eyebrow in total confusion. "We... really aren't friends anymore" "What?! Why?!" He stepped next to me and told me the whole story, nearly bursting out in tears. Apparently, they had a huge fight over one of the dumbest things ever, a girl (no offense if any of you may be reading this). I tried to calm him down some, but I don't really think it was working. "Dude, bros before hoes." "Not very brotherly to snake the girl I was trying to get in bed" "I know... but you two are like...connected at the hip, more so than me and Ben in ways... go make up, you need him right now, and I'm sure he needs you too. It's just that your egos won't allow you to think properly... or should I say your equal levels of pride and cockiness." We both cracked a grin at my grasp of the situation. "I know I've never...openly... told you this before, but thanks. You're a good guy, no matter what people say" "They say stuff about me?" "No, but that's how that saying goes" he say, playfully jabbing me in the arm. "Wouldn't want anyone else for a rival" I said, returning the punch "Same here dude. Same here." "Now go talk to Corey, I'll talk to you later" As we walked back to the gathering, Tristan threw an arm over Corey and took him aside. I smiled a bit as I took a seat next to Ben. He dropped his head on my shoulder, looking a bit pale. "You ok?" I asked, nudging him "Yeah...it's really hot, and I'm thirsty... and I don't wanna be here" I put my arm around him and kissed the top of his head, pulling him closer. We all sat around chatting for awhile before Dan stood up, addressing the group "Well, it just got very warm, so I'm gonna jump in" He shot me a glance suggesting I should do the same. I faked a smile as he headed off to the water. "C'mon guys, why else are we here? Sure as hell isn't for the scenery" Tony added before walking off. A small uproar occurred as the decision became unanimous. I exhaled slowly as I stood up, watching as everyone went off to the water. I looked back at Ben and frowned. "Not feeling so hot huh?" "Not really..." "Well...maybe some water will make you feel better, or at least rinse the sweat off, c'mon." I pulled him to his feet and we took our time getting to the water's edge, slowly undressing. I barely got my socks off before Dan snuck up behind me and quite effortlessly threw me over his shoulder. He's slightly taller and got about thirty pounds on me. I think he's slightly better looking than Tony, but Dan has one main advantage: being carved out of stone. It took me a second to get my bearings, but it was too late. We were in the water, and before I could even think of a way to avoid him, I lifted again and dragged further out. As I surfaced I tried to ready myself for the next move, but it was masked by the huge splash from Tony cannon balling off the dock. Before I knew it, I was pulled under. This was like a goldfish fighting a shark, totally futile. This went on for awhile before I finally got a decent footing on the lake bed and launched myself to shallower water, where they couldn't sneak up on me. By this time, Ben had joined the fray. Our game of extreme water...tag, I guess, went on for quite a while. As the sun was sinking, we all were quite worn out. The Terror Twins retired to the beach to get the last few rays as Ben and I made our way to the dock, sitting down at the end. The beach had pretty much cleared out except for the few of us remaining. Tristan and Corey wandered off hours ago, and the girls were tanning further up the beach, out of blast...I mean splash radius. "This was fun" Ben said, panting slightly. "Yeah... it was nice." I replied, looking over at him, trying to fake a smile. "You know..." He started, scooting closer "...You don't have to throw on that fake smile for me" He continued, kicking at the water with his feet. "But I-" "No you don't" he interrupted, putting a hand on my back. He moved his hand down my back and around to my side, pulling me closer. He rested his head on me as he slid his hand down the side of my trunks. I tilted my head to rest on his as we sat and watched the boats go by for awhile. The sun was quickly setting and wind picked up eerily. "Before we go, I'll tell you again, like I will everyday for who knows how long." He started, kissing my neck "I love you, and I'm here for you no matter what" I exhaled heavily as the words filtered in. I felt a lot better that Ben was with me, I'm sure I would have been a total wreck without him. "Thanks" I whispered. "We should probably go dry off and get some food before it rains again." He said, removing his hand from its comfortable position. I nodded in agreement as we stood up. We wandered off the dock and past Dan and Tony, informing them of our plans. They were getting ready to split as well. As we were walking up the beach, Cassi grabbed my ankle as I went by. She motioned for Ben to keep going. "What's up" I asked, kneeling down. "Is he doing ok?" she asked."His mom called me to check cause apparently he won't answer his phone" "Well, his phones somewhere in my room... and I wouldn't pick up either" I said, lowering my voice. "Yeah, me either, but she's all worried about him" "She knows he's with me, so no need to worry. We're taking good care of each other. Tell her that If you talk to her." "I never had any doubts, but I'm sick of her spamming my phone damnit" "Hahahaha... well, we're gonna split. See you tomorrow?" "Yeah, probably. Oh, by the way, I know it's a bit soon, but your mom called me and told me she was making arrangements. Sounds like the whole deals gonna be on Tuesday." "Hmm...Alright. I'll talk to her when I get back, but we're going for food right now." "Ok, I'll call you tomorrow at some point." As I caught up to Ben, he was drying himself off at the car. He tossed the towel over to me as he got in. I dried off and slid my jeans over my still damp trunks and dropped into the passenger seat, looking over at him as he started the car. "You ok Ben?" "Hmm?...Yeah, I'm fine." "Where you wanna go?" "Well, I have like 5 bucks." "I'll pay for you" "No you do-" "Shut up, where do you wanna go." "I don't care... Arby's sounds good." "Ok then" I said with a smile. "Let's go" Without another word, we burned out of the parking lot. A few minutes later we made a quick stop at Arby's and got some food before going to Ben's house. "I'll be back in a second, need some clothes." "Ok" He hopped out of the car and ran up the sidewalk as I went around to the driver's side. A few minutes later he reappeared with a duffle bag. He opened the passenger door and threw it in the back seat before sliding in, reclining the seat as far as it would go. "Ready?" "Yeah... as fast as possible." My eyes narrowed as I looked over at him. He looked back and shook his head. I decided it would probably be better not to ask what happened inside, so we left without mentioning it. The ride back was quiet aside from the white noise of the radio. I kept glancing over at Ben, and he kept looking more and more upset. Just as we got to my house, I felt a hand on my leg. "Ben, just wait till we get up to my room, ok? Pretend you're Tristan and slap on a fake smile for the parents." He slowly nodded as we stepped out of the car. I waited for him at the door while he grabbed his bag out of the back. I went to open the door, only to be scared half to death by it being thrown open as I grabbed the knob. It was Tristan, beer in hand, he threw his free arm over me and drug me to the living room. As we turned the corner, I saw Corey and my dad sitting on the couch in a deep conversation over what was left of the whisky. "Good... I won't have to drink it if you two do" I said, taking a seat next to Corey. "Ah, Joe, good to see you." He said raising his glass at me. "And..." he started, leaning in, whispering in my ear "Thanks for what you told Tristan today, you got us figured out pretty good" "Heh, no problem. He was having a bit of a hard time today, and figured he needed you just as much as you needed him" "Bingo" "So, how you doing buddy?" "Blah. Nothing really describes bleakness well." "Very true... Oh, Dad, Cassi says the service and crap is on Tuesday?" He nodded in response as he took a big sip of his drink, motioning for me to have one as well. I declined, seeing as we drank far too much the night before. A few minutes past and Ben appeared, still in his...err... my swim trunks. He sat across the room in the empty chair and shot me a glance. I frowned at this and motioned to the whisky. "You need to loosen up" I said with a grin. "I will if you will." He replied, dragging the chair closer. "Sure I will... Line `em up Corey" I shuddered as Corey poured the shots, remembering the headache I woke up with. I looked up at Ben and his face was blank. I leaned over the table and put my hand on his knee. His blank stare continued. "You ok?" "Hmm? Yeah... just kinda out of it." "Alright, just making sure." I KNEW he wasn't alright. I just knew he wasn't. I sighed as I leaned back, snagging one of the shots on my way. We all took a second to reflect before knocking the cheap liquid back. My mind was at war with itself. I didn't know which to be more concerned about. Tuesday, or Ben, or myself. None of the other showed how bad they were feeling, which was good. Trying to stay strong for one person was enough at that point. A few shots and stories later, I could tell Ben was ready to call it a night. I glanced over at the clock, and it was already 11:30. "Yo dad" "Yesssssssss" He said in a snaky tone. "Mind giving these two a ride home? I'm mostly in the bag." "Sure thing." "Thanks." I stood up and motioned for Corey and Tristan to do the same. "You guys both have my number, call if you need anything, ok?" "Yeah" "Gotcha" "Alright then, see you guys...Monday...If I feel like going to school." I said, giving them both a hug. "Dude, you gotta go, we have to practice for the next game" Tristan protested. "I don't need practice" I said in a sarcastic tone "And if you do, you're slipping as my rival" "Pfffft, be there anyways" "Haha ok ok ok. We'll see." I walked them out and threw dad my keys. Corey and Tristan waved as they got in my car. I yelled at them to make sure my dad didn't get pulled over or any of that fun stuff, and that the CD player was empty. Watching them leave, I felt Ben press up against me as he dropped his head on my shoulder. "I'm sorry" "Once again, you did something wrong?" "No, for being a buzz kill." "You seem pretty buzzed to me hahaha" "And...wait...shut the hell up you know what I meant!" "Haha yeah. I only did it cause you weren't looking too good" "Heh...I guess I owe you one." "You look ready for bed." "Yessir I am." "Then let's go." I kicked the door shut as I walked Ben backwards, poking him in the gut with a finger. He tried to smile, but it came out as a bad grin. As we got upstairs, I went to my dresser to empty my pockets. "You look tired too." He said, sprawling out on the bed. "Just mentally" I replied with a sigh. As I unbuckled my belt, Ben pressed up to my back, dropping his chin on my shoulder. Even reeking of the lake, he was sexy as hell. I leaned back into him as one of his hands slid down my midsection while the other rubbed my right pec. (Note: I never did put my shirt back on after the beach). "You sure you're ok Ben?" "No...not really." "Say anything you need to." "...I don't think I deserve you..." "Pfffft, don't say crap like that. I think we had this discussion last night" "But... You've been taking care of me like all day, and I haven't done shit for you." "Ben, you know you don't have to. I know you care." "But its-" "No. Doesn't matter now." I interjected, leaning back more, walking us to the bed. We fell side by side. After staring at the ceiling for a few minutes, I rolled onto my side and slid a hand over Ben's chest. "It'll be ok...Sometime, it'll be ok." I said, rubbing his chest. "I don't like feeling like this. It really sucks." He replied, snaking his arm under me, pulling me closer. "Heh...I don't think anyone likes feeling like this. But... I meant what I said in the car yesterday Ben." "I meant what I said too." I rolled him on top of me and held him tight. He buried his face in the side of my neck as I moved my hands down his back. Then, he completely lost his grip on his feelings. He went on for about an hour about anything and everything that was bothering him. Such as `the girls piss me off' and Tony's better at soccer than me, BUT HE PLAYS FOOTBALL' and anything else that bugged him about his situation. And, much to my surprise, not a word of me was spoken in the rant. The only thing me related was him inching my shorts down throughout his monologue. "Damn dude... feel better that all that's off your chest now?" He took a deep breath and nodded, making himself more comfortable in my arms. "Like hell you don't deserve me." I said in a joking tone, rubbing his back some more. "I don't think I'd want anyone else with me now." "Not even-" "Nope" "But you didn't even hear who I was gonna say" "I know" I smiled as he looked up at me. "I love you Joe." "Love you too Ben... now take those trunks off, I don't need my bed smelling like the lake." He shook his head as he hopped up and dropped them to his ankles and flipped off the light. I stretched out as he got back in bed, leaving him no choice but to snuggle up next to me (not like he wouldn't have anyways). He laid his head on my chest and put his arms around me. I pulled him on top of me again and moved my hands down his back, burying a few fingers in the waistband of his briefs. As he was making himself more comfortable, he moved his hips forward, grinding against my crotch. I could feel his package through my shorts, and it felt like he was more than a little excited. "I just want you to be ok Ben, it really hurts to see you like this." I sighed as he tightened his grip. The next day was a blur. We didn't do anything but stay in bed all day and have a four hour jack off session. Nearing nine o'clock, Ben's mom called the house and told him he had to go to school the next day, so we went to bed early in comparison to what we'd been doing the last few nights. He woke me up before he went to school and said he'd call me at lunch. I went back to bed until he called like he said. "Hey babe" he crackled over the weak cell phone connection "Hahaha...never called me that before. "How's the day going?" "Meh...it's ok. Lots of people aren't here, I'm all alone" "Not even Dan and Tony are there?" "Not even Cassi and Heather. I think I saw Corey, but I was running late and didn't think too hard about it." At that moment, the Terror Twins and the girls burst in my room. "I found them..." "Huh?" "They all just appeared haha." Tony snatched the phone from me as Dan stood me up. "Get dressed, we're going out, and tell little brother we're gonna steal him" Dan ordered as he threw some clothes at me. Tony nodded as he passed along the message and I heard Ben yell YES over the phone. I sloppily threw my clothes on and we ran out of the house. Tony and the girls piled into the SUV while Dan and myself got in my car. "Dude...you don't have this yet." He said, pulling a CD out of his pocket. My eyes widened as I saw what it was. "You put that in NOW!" I said as I started the car."But first, pass me my shades... it's fuckin' bright out here" He laughed at me as he threw me my shades and popped the CD in. With a flick of my finger, I cranked it as we pulled out of the driveway. The drive to school went by fast with the newly acquired metal, which was good. It didn't give me a chance to think about how I was feeling. It was a nice break. As I was trying to find a parking spot, Dan had me stop so he could get out. "I'm gonna go find Ben, just park in the visitors spot." I nodded as he hopped out. He must've been on something cause it seemed like 5 seconds before he was back. He slid in the back seat, letting Ben sit in front. As he got in, he leaned over and kissed my cheek and smiled. "How ya doing Joe?" He asked, making himself comfortable "And damn you need to shave" "Still jealous?" "As always." Dan chuckled at the remark, scratching at his insane sideburns. "You shut up back there!" "Oh you love it. But, more importantly, how you holding up little brother?" "I was really lonely all day...where were you guys?!" "We played Halo all night...sorry" "Bastards..." "But enough about that, let's go" We got honked at by Tony and followed him out. The rest of the day was spent driving around to random places and hanging out. By the time the sun was going down, we had ended up at the park, goofing around in the play ground. I took a seat on the merry-go-round and watched everyone else for awhile until Ben came and sat with me. "Well...is it working?" he asked, leaning on me "Hmm?" I replied. "Is this getting your mind off things?" "Oh...yeah. Really well actually. What about you?" "Doing just fine." We sat there and watched the others for awhile, and we both noticed Tony was missing from the picture. We heard the bars of the merry-go-round creak. Turning around, there was Tony, with an evil grin on his face. We both stared at him as he spun us around, faster and faster. A few minutes went by before the rest of them came over and jumped on. Tony had obviously been working out or something, because even with five of us on the thing, he never broke a sweat or slowed his pace. After a few more vicious spins, he jumped on, riding it out till the end. "The sky needs to make up its mind" I grumbled, looking up at the swelling clouds. "Yeah it does. It's done this like every day this week" Ben added. "It's foretelling tomorrow" Dan said in an eerie tone. "No kidding...ugh." As the wheel slowed to a stop, we all sat there and took in the sunset before it was swallowed up by the clouds. A few minutes of quite went by before anyone said anything "Guy's..." Ben started, lowering his voice. "Thanks. I'm sure this would all really suck if I didn't know all of you." "And I'm sure it would really suck if we didn't know you" Tony said with a smile. "Heh, thanks bro." "No problem kiddo." My cell went off, and it was my mom, telling us to come home before the weather turned destructive. Without much hesitation, we all made for the vehicles. "You staying over again Ben?" "What do you think?" I smiled as we got in my car. We waved goodbye to the others as the burned out of the parking lot. A few minutes passed with us just sitting there in the silence. "Tomorrow's gonna suck." Ben said, dropping his head. "Mhm mhm" I nodded. "How was your day until we stole you?" "It was really lonely... And that was about it. I wanted to call you earlier to make sure you were ok." "Heh... I went back to bed after you left. And see? You're a damn awesome boyfriend." I said, leaning over and kissing him. "I dunno...I still feel worthless" "Ben...Seriously. Don't beat yourself up over it. We're all going through the same thing right now. We all feel a bit powerless I think." "But you and Tony and Dan are taking it like troopers... and I just feel so weak." He dropped his head into his hands and leaned against the dashboard. I rubbed his back a bit and reassured him the best I could. "You just wanna go to home and chill?" "Yeah...that sounds good." I pulled him in for a quick hug before we left, trying to make him feel better. "I've got your back. No matter what. Promise." "Thanks Joe." We left the park as the sky went black. I took my time getting home, cause I knew Ben wasn't doing so good, and wanted to give him a chance to vent if he needed it. Mom called a few more times, but I ignored it, we'd be home soon enough. Somewhere along the long ride home, Ben cranked the stereo, blasting the CD Dan left. He decided he was gonna burn a copy for himself when we got back. As we returned, we were greeted by the parents. "And just where do you two think you're going?" "Drinkin" dad replied. "You kids drank all my whisky" "You two going to school tomorrow?" My mom asked, digging through her purse. "I dunno. I might go to pick up Ben afterwards, but I seriously don't plan on it." I replied. "Well... I don't wanna go either damnit" Ben said with a sigh."But you all know how my mom is" "I'll just call you in sick" "Wow...thanks other mom!" "Not a problem dear" We waved them good bye as they got in their car. We retreated up to my room and sprawled out on the bed and watched The 300. About halfway through we go a lot more comfortable and fell asleep before the ending credits, wrapped up in each others arms. The next day came too soon for either of our likings. My mom woke us up at about 2 so we could start getting ready for the worst day of our lives thus far. I took a frighteningly cold shower, and Ben's advice to shave. "You bring enough clothes buddy?" I asked, walking back into my room with a towel around my waist. "Yeah." He replied groggily "I don't know if I can do this." "I don't know if I can either... But I'm going to anyways. Shower's free. You could use one." "Thanks." He said, slowly standing up. "Behave Ben hahahah" I shouted as I heard the bathroom door close. I dropped onto the bed and laid back, staring blankly at the ceiling for awhile before I got dressed. Ben came back awhile later. "Dude...mohawk." "Uhh...what?" "We should get mohawks...right now." I gave him a puzzled look as he sat down next to me. "How awesome would that be? I'm sure Dougy would approve." "I'm sure he would...heh...sure. But at least put some shorts on first, I'm sure my mom doesn't wanna see your junk." We laughed it off as he threw on a pair of my boxers. We informed mom of our plan and she had a good laugh over it as well, and within the hour, we both had mohawks, which looked damn awesome by the way. Doug would be proud. {Later that Day...} The weather was fitting to our mood. Grim overcast threatening a downpour at any moment. The far off thunder stirred up memories of all the storms we used to watch from my window. This wasn't going to be easy. As we walked up to the funeral home, I was bit shaken by the number of people that showed up. People I knew didn't know Doug, and people I knew he didn't like. My anger rose as the faces began to register, but I promptly forgot they existed as Dan manifested and pulled us into the adjoining alley. "How's it going boys?" He asked, leaning up against the brick wall and lighting a cigarette. We both groaned in response as he passed me a smoke. I blankly stared at the pavement as he lit mine for me. "I have a feeling this is going to suck." Ben said, sliding over next to Dan. "Yeah...it won't be fun, that's for certain." He said, taking a long drag of his cig. "Tony and the girls are already inside. You two go to school today?" "Fuck no" I hissed, expelling a huge cloud of smoke. "Mom called us in." Ben answered, laughing a bit. "Heh...nice... But, let's get this over with" Dan said, pushing himself off the wall. "Oh...nice `hawks too" We all sighed heavily before making our way in a side door. The atmosphere was stifling from the number of people and the humidity from the oncoming storm. We wandered about the back rooms trying to keep ourselves collected. I was doing an alright job until my dad appeared and dragged us to the main room, sitting us in the front row, just a few feet from Doug's casket. Almost instantly, Ben and Dan had their arms over my shoulders as we sat down. My mental state quickly degraded as I looked over the closed casket. I dropped my head to hide my fast approaching tears. "Don't lose it yet Joe. Stay with us for a bit." Dan said, rubbing the back of my head. I couldn't even talk for the fear of completely losing my grip on my feelings. My head felt like it was spinning and I felt like puking on one of the unworthy people there. I took a few deep breaths and sat back up, looking at Dan and Ben as the service started. Everyone had something to say about Doug. Cassi, Dan, Tony, Heather, even Ben... But I couldn't find any words that could convey what I was feeling. All I could do as they spoke was sit there in silence with my head in my hands, wishing I wasn't there. After Ben's speech I nearly lost it. As he sat back down, I immediately buried my face in his chest. He didn't say anything as I put his arms around me. I could feel him holding back. As things wrapped up, I made a quick exit out the side door and slid up against the wall. I was so pissed off and upset I didn't even notice I was standing next to Tony until he held out a cigarette. I dropped my head as I took it from him and lit it. "This. Fucking. Sucks." Tony choked out. I nodded in agreement as I took a long inhale. We stood there, not saying anything until Dan appeared and instantly put me in a bear hug. "Dude...Joe" He couldn't even finish his sentence before he broke out in a torrent of tears. I almost lost it as well, but I had to stay collected for him. A few seconds passed before I drug Tony into the hug. We'd been through a lot together, and now it all seemed so fucked up. We took a quick walk around the block to get our heads back on straight, and I power smoked my cig, which lead to a nicotine buzz. As we turned the corner to the funeral home, I spotted Ben hunched over the railing on the stairs. I jumped up the stairs and took the spot next to him. "You look like you feel about the same as I do" I said, throwing an arm over his shoulder. "Heh...yeah...It all kinda hit me after my speech" He said, dropping his head. "Well, we aren't quite done yet... So just hold out a little longer ok? For me?" I said, pulling him in close. He nodded as he stood himself up. After a long hug, we made our way to the parking lot where Dan and Tony were waiting at my car. We all piled in, rolled down the windows, and cranked the stereo. Even though it was overcast, I put my shades on anyways. We burned out of the parking lot and made our way to the cemetery, flying past Cassi and Heather, and racing Tristan and Corey down the back roads to the far out graveyard. The actual burial passed in a blink. The site was under an extremely old oak tree, which lead to some humor. As the last rights were being read, a bunch of spiders fell from it, causing some girly screams and some muffled chuckles. The only other notable thing was the moronic biker-gone-pastor, who really got on my nerves. As the service came to an end, we waited for the others to leave to say our goodbyes. "So...what's the plan." Ben asked, breaking the silence "My mom wants me home tonight" Tony said with a sigh. "Yeah, mine too" Dan added."What about you two?" "I dunno... Ben's mom is being a bitch, so I'm not letting him go home" I said with a big smile. We all laughed a bit as we started for the car. Amazingly, the rain held off until we left the cemetery, and as we arrived at the funeral home, a wicked downpour ensued. Thunder, lightning, the whole deal. "Ok, we're out. See you guys later" the twins said as the hopped out of the car and bolted for their vehicles. "Forgot his CD again" I sighed as I watched them pull out of the parking lot. I looked over at Ben and put a hand on his head. He wasn't doing too well. His usual warm eyes were as cold as the rain falling. I slid my hand down his neck to his shoulders before leaning over and hugging him. He dropped his head onto my shoulder and started to shake slightly as I held onto him. "Just a little longer buddy, ok?" He nodded as I let him go, reclining the seat as far as it could go. As me made our exit I took one last look at the funeral home and shook my head. The rain didn't let up as we got back to my house. As we walked in, I spotted a note on the fridge: Boy's, won't be home tonight, BEHAVE. A grin crept across my face as I read the note aloud. "Pffft...do they know who they're talking to?" Ben asked as he unearthed the remaining apple pie. "Apparently not." I said, snagging two shot glasses. "Grab some citrusy stuff too" he added, grabbing a bottle of vodka. "Not messing around today huh?" "Hell no... I think we need this" I smiled at him as we made our way to my room. Ben threw in some metal we hadn't listened to in a long time and cranked the stereo before taking a swig of the apple pie. He grinned at me as he passed me the bottle. Without hesitation I grabbed the bottle and knocked back a huge shot of it, wincing slightly. We finished the apple pie in no time flat, and threw in a crappy horror movie. The night went on with a sad undertone. Before the next round of shots, Ben stopped what he was doing, turned down the TV, and sat on my lap, putting his free arm around me. "You already know this" He started, talking a bit slow from the booze "But I fucking love you, more than you can comprehend." "Oh I think I do... cause I fucking love you that much too." We slid back to the wall and I propped myself up in the corner. I slammed the rest of my drink and tossed the plastic cup at the trash can, missing it completely. "How we doing?" I asked, sliding my arms under his and putting my hands on his stomach. All I got was a groan as he dropped his head backwards onto my shoulder. "You did good today Ben. Did way better than I did" "I dunno, you didn't flip and kill anyone, so I think that's pretty good" "Heh. Thanks. But seriously, how are you holding up?" Once again, all I got was a groan as he rolled over, pressing his face into my neck and sighing. I moved my hand up his back to the back of his head. "We made it through...and you don't have to hold back anymore" I whispered, holding him tighter. At that moment, we both lost it. We sat there, mostly drunk and out of our minds with sadness, for what seemed like hours. My eyes hurt, my heart hurt, and I in general hurt. "I love you Joe." Ben choked out between sobs. "Love you too Ben" I said, trying to wipe away some of his tears. "Joe...I think I wanna sleep" "That sounds like a good idea. Better change out of the funeral clothes first" "Haha yeah, probably" He slid off me and out the door. Sighing heavily, I stood up and walked over to the dresser and started unbuttoning my shirt. I came to the last button, and felt a pair of hands move around my waist and untuck my shirt. Ben pressed up against my back and dropped his chin onto my shoulder. "You look to incredible right now...I couldn't help myself" He said in my ear, undoing the last button of my shirt "Lemme help you with that belt" he continued, taking hold of the buckle. "Heh...sure" I said with a grin, dropping my arms. He fumbled around with the buckle a bit before getting it off, quickly ripping the belt from its loops. With his hands freed up, he popped the button on my pants open with one hand and unzipped the fly with the other. I closed my eyes as one of his hands slipped down my shorts, slowly following the trail of hair downward. "You wanna finally do it?" I asked, putting my hand on his "Yeah" he replied, kissing my cheek. Up to this point, after a year of being together, we'd only gone as far as blow jobs. Mainly because we were always busy and or passed out with other people in the room. Not very fitting for our first time if you ask me. I gasped as he took my stiffening cock in his hand. Moaning a bit, I leaned back into him. He started to stroke me as I peeled off my shirt. Running his free hand up my chest, he flicked at my right nipple with his thumb before moving his hand back down and pulling me back onto the bed. We fell back, with me on top of him. I quickly kicked off my pants and Ben slid my boxers down to my knees. I sat up and turned around, straddling him. His eyes had returned to their normal state by this point. He smiled up at me as I pulled of his shirt and undid his pants, throwing them in the corner, revealing his very swollen tool in his oh-so-tight briefs. I got off him and kneeled at the edge of the bed, between his legs. I looked up (or down...whatever) his body and slowly ran my hands up the insides of his legs, sliding a hand up one of the leg opening. His cock was straining against the fabric of his briefs and he was leaking a bit of precum. I withdrew my hand and put both at his sides, hooking my fingers in the waistband. Pulling them down slowly, his cock sprang out. "Looking pretty stiff there" I said, wrapping a hand around the base. He threw back his head as I stroked him slowly before lowering my head over it. He put his hands on the back of my head. I took a breath before taking all 7½ inches of Ben into my mouth. I heard him moan as he hit the back of my throat. As I worked my way up and down, all I heard were whispers of `Oh God' and `Joe that's amazing'. He began to breathe more heavily, squirming a bit as I continued to use his cock as a pacifier. "Aww Joe...go-...Fucking amazing" I hummed, running a hand up his flexed abs. His breathing increased as I sucked harder, paying special attention to the underside of the head. He started to thrust into my mouth as he ran his fingers through my mohawk. A few minutes later, his whole body tightened up and he forced my head all the way down, burying my nose in his neatly shaved pubes and grinding my chin into his balls. I nearly gagged as he exploded in my mouth, blasting the back of my throat with four large loads of cum. Amazingly, I got it all down. I licked him clean as he lay there completely out of breath. "Fucking...wow. Where'd you learn how to do that?!" he exclaimed as I pulled myself up next to him. All I did was grin as I rolled on top of him. He put his arms around me and lifted his head to kiss me. Before I knew it, our tongues were at war. All the grinding made him hard again within minutes. The way I was positioned, I felt his cock creep up the inside of my leg and come to a stop once it reached my hole. By this point I was oozing precum all over Ben's stomach. He rolled me over and broke our makeout session and began working his way down, kissing random places on my neck and moving down to my chest. I tensed up as he ran his tongue over each of my nipples then straight down my chest where he tongued my belly button. He dropped his chin onto my abs and dragged the slight amount of stubble he had down to the base of my cock, looking up at me with a sly grin. Without hesitation, he took my 8 inch tool in his hand and ran his tongue down to the base and up again, causing me to shiver. He shot me one last glance before he took me in his mouth. Waves of pleasure radiated over me as Ben tried to mimic what I did to him. He was right, complete and total euphoria. This was one hundred times better than anything he'd ever done before. My eyes rolled as he went up and down, very slowly. His hands wandered over me, exploring every inch within his reach. His touch was electrifying as he moved like a piston on my cock. "God damn Ben...Gah... Please don't stop" I said between moans. At that comment, he withdrew with a loud slurp. His eyes slowly locked with mine like the first time we met, and a feeling of pure lust shot through me. He barely had a chance to stand up before I hooked a leg around him, bringing him down on top of me. I rolled us over and we started making out again. "I wanna fuck you REALLY bad" I whispered in his ear, running my hand down to his cock. "I want you to too" I kissed him again before standing up. I forgot how drunk I was when my equilibrium tried to level out. Somehow, Ben jumped up and caught my fall. "Where ya going?" "To get some lube, be right back." I stumbled over to Doug's room and rifled through his desk. I twitched as I found a picture of the both of us in the drawer. I took a second to think of when the picture was taken, and laughed at the situation. But back to the matter at hand. I looked back in the drawer and found his bottle of KY. "Heh...thanks Doug" I dashed back to my room to find Ben sprawled out on the bed. Sitting back down, he sat up and wrapped his arms around me, took a firm grip on my dick and snatching the lube from me. I groaned as he started lubing me up, stroking me slowly. As he finished, he slowly pulled his hand away, running it up my chest to my chin. Tilting my head, he locked lips with me again as I turned around and got on top of him. He wrapped his legs around me as we continued to furiously make out, grinding against each other. "I want you in me...NOW" he said, adjusting himself. I grinned at him as I sat up. Reaching over for the lube, I told him to roll back on his shoulders so I could lube him up. "This is probably gonna hurt like a bitch" I said, rubbing some of the KY on and around his hole."But they say it goes away after awhile" His eyes rolled and he gasped as I slid two fingers in. He dropped his legs on my shoulders as I started to slowly drive my fingers deeper. Ben started to twitch a bit as I got into a rhythm, forcing a few moans out of him as I got down to the third knuckle. "You alright?" "Yeah...oh god...ahhh... C'mon Joe" I pushed his legs up and had him hold them to his chest. I applied some more lube to his hole and my cock and positioned myself. "Squeeze me if it hurts" "I'd squeeze you anyways" I spread his legs and moved forward, putting the head of my cock against his hole. As I began to push forward, he wrapped his legs around my sides and put his hands on my shoulders. As I got the head in, he yelped and bound me with his legs, forcing me in faster that I planned. The feeling was mind numbing as he clenched his ass muscles around my cock. He was so tight my advance was slowed. "Just relax Ben" I whispered, dropping my head next to his. Following my instructions, he stopped clenching so tightly, and I slid all the way in. We lay there for awhile, taking in the moment. As the strangle hold on my dick died down, Ben looked up at me. He smiled and kissed my forehead. "Ok...I'm ready" I pulled back slowly, causing him to jerk and squeeze me again. I pulled it almost all the way out, then pushed back a bit faster, making him squirm beneath me. My rhythm started off slowly, taking the time to let Ben get used to the new feeling. I could tell he was adjusting well by the huge grin on his face, and his rock hard cock rubbing against my stomach. As I quickened my pace, he grabbed the back of my head and pulled me down, locking lips with me again. Every thrust sent tingles all over my body. I must've been hitting a sweet spot, because with every movement, Ben moaned a little more and tightened his grip around me. "Joe I- holy shit. Joe, I love you" He managed to get out between grunts. "I love you too Ben" I said, kissing a few places on his neck. I increased my pace a bit more. I had a pretty good idea of where his g-spot was at this point, and made an effort to hit it every time. He ran his hands down my sides as I continued pounding him, resting his hands on my hips. His moans increased ten fold. "I think I'm gonna cum...no, defiantly gonna cum" "What a coincidence, so am I" We started making out again as I forcefully thrust as deep as I could. He was doing his part by clenching his ass in time with my movements. I inhaled his scent and it made the room spin, it was great. We were both slick with sweat and fueled by the insane amount of testosterone in the room...the amount of booze we drank didn't hurt either. I couldn't hold back anymore. With one final thrust, I buried my cock in him and exploded, pumping load after load of cum into him. This was also enough to set Ben off. He took my hand and put it on his dick. I wrapped my fingers around it and stroked him once, causing him to shoot a huge load all over both of our stomachs. I collapsed on him, totally spent. My cock was super sensitive in the post orgasm glow, causing me to shudder as I pulled out. Running his hands up to my shoulders, Ben locked me in his grip. "That...was fucking amazing" He whispered in my ear as I tried to catch my breath. "Heh, thanks. You weren't bad yourself" I replied, snaking my arms under him. We laid there for awhile in each others arms. He slid out from under me and turned the light off, and threw in some random movie. Getting back into bed, he curled up next to me and put his head on my chest. "Ok, I'm really gonna sleep now. I love you Joe" "I love you too Ben. Good night" I kissed the top of his head and made myself more comfortable before drifting off to the best sleep I'd had in days. The mid morning sun seeped through the shades as I was awoken by a weight on my chest. My eyes slowly opened, scanning the room. As my gaze drifted downward, a large smile crept across my face. I could feel a hand slowly running down my side. "Morning sexy" Ben said, still mostly asleep. "Good morning" I replied, stretching a slightly. "How'd ya sleep?" "Pretty damn good" he whispered as he lifted his head, looking at me with a sleepy gaze. I continued smiling as I rubbed the back of his head, trailing down his neck to the center of his back. As the rest of my body woke up, I could feel everything, and by the feel of things, we were both very naked. Comments, encouragement, etc can be sent to the following: antiversum@yahoo.com