Date: Mon, 10 Nov 2008 00:42:32 -0500
From: lila_is@live.ca
Subject: Steppin Out -/highschool/Book 3/Chapters 19-20

This is a series of works of gay erotic fiction. If you are offended by
such material or if you are not allowed access to it under the laws where
you live, please exit now.

This work is copyrighted by the author and LBL Services Canada. 1990-2008

and may not be copied or distributed in any form without the written
permission of the author, who may be contacted at: lila_is@live.ca

Any and all celebrities mentioned in this story have no affiliation to this
piece of writing and I make no claim to their person as my own. All
Mentioned places and people are factious and any bearing resemblance to
anyone person or place is purley coincidental

***********************************

INTRODUCTION:

Steppin' Out (Book 3) On the straight and Narrow - Copyright 1997-2008
By Lila Mosher Full series already E-published on line, if you wish
to read it all in it's entiriety please Mail Lila and ask for the link thanks.

A love lost, a love gained, two families
become closer as a third is added
to the extended family tree Aikrii and Mani
have created for themselves. Even through
the sorrow each love thrives to florish
to the best it can be. A tear jerker so
be sure to have lots of tissues!


***********************************

Thanks to ALL who have mailed me already due to book 1's listing, the
responses are amazing, I can't believe some have already ready all THREE
books!  (on line) The books main web site has hit an all time high of
45-50000 page hits respectivilly each month and it's mainly due to the
listing here in Nifty, thanks Also note if you read the books on line
there IS a forum for fans to post comments in :D So please by all means
use it to have your say about what you read or mail me :D either way is great.



Please enjoy book 3 ...keep watching here for
the next chapters to be posted, ALL will be
listed here in due time, thanks again everyone!!!

PS summer vacation is almost over and to those
who read all my stuff on line so far, I WILL
be back to writing SOON (2nd week of September)
so keep your eyes out on the series main web site
you'll see book 4 and 5 getting compleated :D
enjoy what I have now and PLEASE post in the
forums I LOVE to hear from fans, really I do! :)

Lila


Chapter 19 -- What happens now?
*****************************

She picked up Faith and balanced her on her hip as she ran the bottle under
the tap to warm it.  She chattered to her daughter happily. Faith was
babbling away happily right back at her mom.  Sefron walked in with Mani
who was talking about Matt and the next session that was planned.  It had
been a rough month. Becky had been killed during the attack on Matt and her
back in August.  She was shot and died before anyone could get her to the
hospital, Matt had such sever head injuries that he had to have surgery to
repair damage to his brain and a fractured skull.  The young men who had
been in cahoots with Mike when he was selling drugs around Matt and Becky's
school, who had both been involved in the attack had gotten off on a
technicality.  It pissed Mani and Aikrii off to no end, that the young
offenders system in Canada allowed for such atrocities to happen. Her
funeral was a somber one and it made for a very depressing two weeks
after. Not even her real parent's showed for it which was just as sad. A
young life had been lost and Mani's family was devastated, Aikrii taking it
the hardest since he did get quite attached to his foster daughter, the
young lady had brought them much in the short time they had known her. The
after effects still hung over Matt's head as well.  Two times he had to be
admitted to the hospital due to suicidal attempts. His depression had been
getting worse as each day went by but recently Mani noticed a change. Matt
still refused to talk but he did write down things, thou without
emotion. He didn't cry, he didn't smile and he didn't respond with emotion
of any sort. Jeff and Kolten were beside themselves trying to figure out
how to make things better.

"I really have no idea how to get him to speak again, it's been hell on all
of us."

Mani said to Sefron who along with Dante & because Sefron was working more
often at the Do-jang decided to obtain course in youth counseling and was
now working with Mani to get Matt back to his old former exuberant self.

Mardi was the one who suggested something Mani didn't think of.

"Ever consider the fact that Matt misses Becky so much his heart is
broken?"

She looked at them and she was serious.

"What here is left that is part of Becky that Matt could relate to or care
about as much?"

Mani looked at her and his eyes widened as the obvious to Mardi dawned on
him.

"Zack!" He smiled.

He had never thought to add Zack into the picture. Maybe an outing or
something where Zack was with them would help. He knew Matt liked the boy
and there was the tie to Becky and hopefully Matt would see it to. He
smiled at Mardi and thanked her. Sefron walked over and he kissed his wife
and his daughter.

"Takes a mom to see the obvious sometimes I guess."

he said smiling again as he pushed a stray strand of her hair from her
face.

"Na, just a observant after thought. I'm sure Mani would have figured it
out sooner or later."  She said smiling up at her hubby.

Faith reached up to him and said "Dada" He looked down at her and took her
in his arms.

"Well, well looks like someone here has learned a new word." He gave her
cheek a happy squish and smiled at her as she giggled.

"Yeah she started that this morning. I didn't think she knew what she was
saying but I guess she does."

Mardi chuckled. Aikrii walked in then with Zack tucked in his arms he was
signing to the little fella who was once again memorized at the sounds
Aikrii was producing. Faith then looked and grinned like mad she loved
listening to singing to and most of the time it was her mom she heard, but
she seemed to enjoy hearing Aikrii sing as well. She reached to him as he
got closer. Sefron chuckled.

"Think you can handle two?"

Aikrii grinned and scooped her up in his free arm and looked at the little
angel who was reaching for his hair which had grown a lot in the last
year. Her tugging made him realize it may be time for a trim.  Faith then
turned her attention to Zack in his other arm.

"bey-bey!" she squawked as she ran her hand down his cheek and planted a
sloppy kiss on him.

"Yes Faith, baby. Gentle now ok." He said to her as he balanced her back to
her side of his arms.  Aikrii was impressed she was talking very early for
one so small but it wasn't all that much of a surprise, Aikrii had heard of
little ones learning to speak earlier and earlier heck he'd seen it on TV
many times.

She looked at her mom who had her bottle and beamed.

"Ba!" she screamed happily making Zack jump and then cry. Faith got worried
and pouted.

"Oh it's ok hun, go to mama I'll fix this."

He passed her back to her mom and then consoled Zack who was only startled
so he settled fast.


"She's sure learning fast." Aikrii said smiling.

"I think it's because we always talk to her non stop or someone is singing
so she's picking up on stuff super fast, Sefron reads to her every night
to."

"Guess that helps." Aikrii looked down at Zack and kissed his forehead.  He
was starting to drift but still had his pout on. Aikrii adored that little
boy.  Mani walked over to Aikrii and kissed his cheek.

"I think someone needs to go lay down and get a nap." Aikrii said as he
looked at Mani.


"Yeah he's falling asleep in your arms" Mani said chuckling as he looked
down at his son.

"I meant you," Aikrii poked in.

"Hunny, you look like hell. Matt is going to come around you're stressing
on him and it effecting your sleep."

Aikrii ran his hand through Mani's hair and looked into his eyes.

"I know it's been tough but he won't get better if you get sick to ok."

He then kissed his nose and passed Zack's now sleeping form over to his
hubby.

"Take him and you two go get some sleep ok. I'll be up later to check on
you I have to talk to Troy anyway about a new prototype we're working on."

Mani sighed as he cradled his little fella, Aikrii was right. He did need
sleep.  He smiled as he hugged Aikrii quickly and headed up to their
room. He crawled into their bed and tucked a few pillows on one side and
laid Zack down putting himself on the other side so Zack wouldn't fall off
the bed if he rolled. Snuggling in he passed out quickly with this little
fella holding onto his finger for dear life and making sucking nosies.
**************************************************

She hadn't had a dream like this in a long time. Selina could feel the
pull. Her new place was amazing and she was enjoying the freedom to come
and go. Nye was working a lot lately and yet it was a good thing for him he
loved to DJ it was second to her and he had said so.  When the stresses of
Becky's death hit Nye it hit Selina as well. Matt was one of her favorite
kids when she worked with her dads at the pool. She had cried off and on
for a week after Becky had died and seeing Matt turn into a shell of what
he use to be, it troubled her to no end. She dreamed of his existence, his
former self trapped in the back of his mind. screaming to escape, the image
of him like a rat stuck to a live trap came to mind a few times to her as
she envisioned him trying to pull itself free only to scream in agony as
the goop pulled him down. The goop was depression she could see it oozing
all around him and like anyone who had a heart she could feel herself
trying to get to him in her dream with oil, trying to loosen the sticky
mess from him and let him break free.  Nothing seemed to work thou.

She would cry and then hear Cleo in the back of her mind. "He's not going
to make it."

"But he HAS to!" She'd yell back at Cleo & Cleo would almost always appear.

"He will free himself in his own way Selina, you can not help him."

She would look at Selina in a very disturbing yet sad way.

"He'll be ok won't he?" She never got an answer as it was always the same
damn dream.  Soon as Cleo would speak she would be blown away by a strong
breeze. Her cries on the wind too faint to hear. Selina sat up bolt right
sweating and cursing again.

"Fuck!"

She ran her hands through her long hair pissed Her connection to Cleo was
weaker now than it use to be.  She knew it was because her and Nye's
connection was now stronger than ever. She looked at the clock.  It was
close to three AM that meant Nye would be home from Hoppers really soon
since his gig would be over.  She got up and slipped her slippers on her
feet and padded her sleepy bottom out of her room and down the stairs, on
the first landing she stepped over the newest edition to her home, their
dog Flip which Nye had sent up to him from his parents place, his dog to be
precise, Flip was sprawled out spread eagle across the landing, she looked
over her shoulder after stepping over him and said

"Daddy's coming home."

The dog bolted up straight and his tail started going a mile a minute. He
followed her down the stairs.  She went to the kitchen flicking on the hall
lights as she went so Nye could make it without tripping over
anything. Flip sat at her feet as she took some milk and warmed it in a
sauce pan. Nye always needed to have this if he didn't do it she would if
she was awake but it always relaxed him.  She heard the door click.

"I'm in the kitchen hun" she called out.

He walked in visibly tired.

"What are you doing up this late?"

he asked her as he kissed her cheek and hugged her around her waist. Flip
stood on his hind legs leaning his front paws against Nye's leg eager for a
pat from his owner. Nye looked down at him and reached for him to getting
his hand cleaned by an eager pup.

"Damn bad dream again. I wish I could figure it out but Cleo keeps leaving
and I can never hear her answers."

She passed him the mug of warmed milk which he took and he walked with her
over to the sofa. He sat and she snuggled in against him as he sipped his
drink.

"Maybe she thinks you're best to not do anything." He said, "When she was
alive there were things she to wouldn't get involved with only because she
knew her limits.  Maybe perhaps this is a limit?"

Selina didn't like that concept one bit and her brow furrowed.

"Well I certainly won't take that concept hun sorry, love you but this is
one thing I won't stay out of, I want to help Mani and Matt and dad."

She turned and looked at him.

"I always help in some way it's my nature."

Nye loved her nature and pushed her hair from her worried face he kissed
her forehead and said

"I understand that sweetie but think about it this way. Cleo tells you in
your dreams he has to free himself right?"  She nodded yes.

"Well if this is something he has to do then you should let it be, if you
decide to get involved then your doing it for the wrong reasons. Maybe
thats what Cleo is trying to tell you."

She sighed and thought about his thoughts for a moment and considered it
and sighed again.  'Dammit, he could be right' she thought. He could feel
her tension ease. Maybe he got his point across, he had noticed how
stressed she had been over the whole situation and personally he felt this
wasn't something she needed to be involved with.

"I know how much you want to help everyone hun, but it doesn't make you bad
because you couldn't this time ok."

He pulled her close and kissed her forehead again. He hated to see her
worried and upset.

"Come on I need sleep and I think you might to."

He stood, reached down for her hand and helped her to her feet, kissing her
as she reached lip level.  He walked still holding her hand to the counter
deposited his cup and then gently tugged her hand and headed up to bed.

******************************************************


He looked at the IV going into his arm. The mind numbing drugs pulsing into
his hand.  A band-aid to fix his sorrows. He had tried again to hurt
himself all because of his head injury and his depression that ate at him
like maggots on a rotting corpse.  Mani was back and forth that last month
trying to make him function again. Nothing worked at first. Those boys
ruined his life, his dreams, his love. He looked at the IV again. Yes the
system let him down, this much he knew. Like the drugs going into his body
the system cycled things in and then it was pissed out again later only to
continue polluting the area over and over again.  He was learning how to
comprehend things around him thou and how to use the processed info to his
advantage. His thoughts thou numb from the drugs were still quite clear. He
didn't talk but he did manage to communicate. Mani believed he was getting
better, he was happy to know this.  He had relayed he wanted to go back to
school. Mani felt this was a good thing and encouraged him to get better so
he could go back.

Matt looked at his hand again the IV stung. He waited the Doctor would be
in soon to remove it and he knew he would be going back home. Jeff was
walking in the door when he decided school was where he would be happiest
at. No more stinging he thought.  Jeff leaned down and without saying a
word he kissed his nephew on his head. Matt faked it...  he smiled which
made Jeff beam. Matt hated deceiving anyone but he wanted out of this hell.
He hated the hospital.

"You ready to go kiddo?" Jeff asked his nephew.

It was nice seeing the boy smile it had been a long time. He watched Matt
nod his head and smile again thou the smile didn't last. Jeff nodded at the
Doctor who removed his IV and then prescribe new medication for Matt to
take to help control the pain in his skull from the past surgeries and the
fracture which would still need another two more weeks to heal
properly. Matt got up and stood. He reached for Jeff's hand and leaned
against him. Jeff felt he would need more support than his arm to lean
against. Mani had told Jeff to keep close contact to him as he would need
it stimulation was a good thing so he knows he's still here. Touch. Talk
and show emotions even if it's mild anger. All of this to make sure Matt
understood that he could do this to. Mani wasn't quite sure how badly the
skull fracture and the injury to Matt's brain had affected him but he
didn't want the boy too confused. Jeff picked him up and patted Matt's
back. Matt felt like a child. He snuggled in he did feel good. He relaxed,
it was a matter of minutes and he was asleep.

Jeff was surprised to say the least but he took him home. Matt Slept all
the way home and when Jeff woke him Matt was startled. Jeff kept that in
mind Matt's third emotional response.  Maybe things were looking up after
all. He smiled at Matt.

"It's ok kiddo, we're home. Ok."

He turned off the truck and slid from the seat and went to the passenger
side.  Matt reached for Jeff's hand and slid from the seat to walking. He
didn't remember the house all that well. He knew it was important but he
didn't remember it. Matt looked around and spotted what was now the shed,
he went to the door and opened it and looked in and turned back with a
confused look on his face.

"The house is over here now Matt. I know there's things you won't and don't
remember but they will come back in time ok."

He reached out to him again. Matt remembered a lot of stuff. Like Becky
dying. He remembered the attack.  He didn't however remember his mother. He
was scared of that woman and he didn't know why, but he knew he should be
he just didn't know why. He had forgotten who Selina was thou, she still
visited a lot.  She always looked so sad it bothered him. He had forgotten
Kolten who also seemed saddened to but he learned he did like him. He
remembered a few of his friends from school. The doctors said that Matt's
memories were like that of a shattered cup that had been glued back
together. It was there, it was tangible but there were pieces missing that
had been in retrospect "swept away" some might return but many would have
to be learned again or replaced. Matt entered the house and some things
flooded back.  Mani was there and he smiled at him he remembered Mani and
Dante was there as well. He did remember him as well. When Matt looked
again he saw a small child Mani was holding. He walked over to Zack and
picked him up into his arms and hugged him. He remembered Zack. A true
emotion came through when he picked up the baby. He cried and everyone saw
it. Mani held back he was concerned for both boys.  He looked at Matt.

"Do you remember who this is Matt?"

Matt shook his head yes. He reached over to the counter where there was a
pen and paper.  He wrote. 'Becky -- Zack.' His eyes held true sorrow,
something Mani had been trying to help Matt cope with.

"I'm sorry if bringing Zack here is making you sad Matt. Do you need time
to yourself?" He asked him.

Matt shook his head no. He wrote again. "Not sad at Zack being here. I'm
sad cause he won't have his mom to help him."

Mani bit the bullet hoping this offer made Matt happy again.

"Would you like to help me with Zack then? I know Becky would approve of
you helping Zack. To protect him.  Do you think you can do this?"

Mani waited hoping this would encourage him to get stronger. It always
seemed that if a child had a reason to make something else smile or feel
stronger they learned that there was love at the other end when they took
care of something living. Most therapists used pets. Mani was using his son
but only because he was a direct link to Becky and Matt's sorrow over
loosing her. Matt smiled again and nodded.  Mani was pleased. He looked at
Jeff and smiled to.

"I have to talk to your uncle. Can you feed Zack his bottle?"

Matt nodded and too the bottle Mani had sitting in a warm glass from him
and walked to the sofa and sat down to feed Zack who was happy to guzzle
the offered meal. Mani took Jeff out of ear shot.

"I think he's coming around it will be VERY slow. It's not going to be
easy. I don't even know how much damage was done but the thing is he's now
showing emotional reactions to his surroundings."  Mani sighed. "I wish
this crap hadn't happened Jeff, with everything going on now."

Jeff nodded and sighed to. "It's ok Mani, it's just how things happen. I'm
kind of thankful Matt doesn't remember his grand dad. It will be easier
when the loss comes around for him at least. For me it's going to be a kick
in the teeth."

Mani rest a reassuring hand on his friends back.

"Your tough you'll do what needs to be done. For now keep an eye on him
ok. If you have problems call me.  He's welcomed to come to the house to. I
think his interaction with Zack will get him talking again ok."

Jeff nodded. He was worried but he was happy to see Matt's subtle changes.

"I'm off for now" Kolten called out as he walked down the stairs. Jeff
walked to his boyfriend and hugged him.

"Call me if you need a pick up ok." He kissed Kolten and smiled Kolten in
turn chuckled.

"I think Selina will be more than happy to dump me back here when we're
done.  I won't be long promise hun ok." With that he was out the door Mani
just watched the whole scene.

"He's off to help Selina with a house project." Jeff clarified.

"Ahh, look out you might loose him for a few weeks if thats the case and
not because of Selina but because of my brother, don't ask me why but the
boy is pretty interior savvy." Jeff chuckled

They walked back out towards the living room and they could hear
humming. Mani looked and noticed Zack was memorized. Music, well humming
was what had his attention now. Matt was doing the song he remembered from
when he and Becky had spent together. The piano songs she had played, this
song from what Mani could remember was the Phil Collins one called Do you
remember and for some strange reason it seemed to suit the mood he could
feel coming from Matt. Zack babbled as Matt hummed.  There was no words but
that didn't seem to matter to the baby, he just enjoyed the noise.  He
gripped Matt's thumb. The boy smiled at the infant as he continued to
hum. Mani was very happy to see this interaction. It was always a good
thing to see. He looked at Jeff and told him to make sure Sandy knew of the
progress and that their regular psychiatrist should still keep seeing Matt
as often as possible. Jeff nodded understanding the importance of making
sure the utmost best was done for Matt in his recovery. Mani entered the
living room as he finished the song and Zack finished his bottle.

"Thank you very much Matt, you've been a very big help."

He looked at the boy who was still holding the infant. Matt passed him the
bottle which was now empty and propped Zack on his shoulder and patted the
little ones back, it wasn't long before Zack burped so loud that even Matt
jumped. It made him laugh. He pulled Zack back and smiled at him. He would
protect this little one for Becky. No matter what. He passed Zack to his
dad and smiled. He reached for his paper and wrote 'Thank you' on it and
passed it to Mani, who smiled.

"Your welcome Matt. If you want to visit just call and ask ok and we'll
both be back tomorrow ok."

Matt nodded he was feeling better now and he still had one thing to ask
Mani.

'School?" he wrote

"You can go back if you want to yes. Do you think you can handle it?"

Mani was concerned but he was asking on his own so Mani would encourage him
to do what he needed to to feel normal again. Matt nodded his head
yes. Matt wanted to go back.  What he needed was there. What he wanted was
there. His means to an end to his torment was there and he knew it. School
was a perfect spot to be. Books, friends and endless noise.
*********************************************

He returned and noticed the stares. The pity. He knew he was where he
wanted to be. He observed things around him. His teachers let him have more
'leash' so to speak. Freedom was something he took advantage of though
while there. At home his uncle and his uncle's boyfriend hovered over him
always concerned. He hated that. He scoffed at a monitoring teacher at
lunch and without saying a word he walked away giving her the finger when
he was chastised for his behavior and not answering her when she asked a
question. It was another student who told her he didn't speak anymore, she
said there was no excuse and sent him to the office, it was when that
happened he finally got pissed and yelled. Not words just a scream. He was
being treated no differently here than at home. He just wanted to be left
alone. Left to do his work to think, to ponder things he had no control
over He wrote to the principal as he was sitting in the office waiting to
'talk' to the man whom he had never met.

'I am not answering anything if it means I have to speak. If I am forced I
shall remove myself from this school and find other educational means. I
should be allowed to function as a normal student who has made a choice to
not speak. Just consider me one less student you or any other teacher will
have to think "damn I wish they'd just shut-up and sit still." and no one
can say teachers don't think like this I was one of them kids who use to
have teachers say this about me lots when I was younger.  I will continue
to do my work and function to the necessary level to keep teachers off my
back.  If there are issues please talk to my uncles I'm sure them hovering
over me anymore than they do now will help the situation even more.'

He waited as he watched one student get hauled into the office he had hand
cuffs on in front of him and a police officer was holding him. He was
forcibly shoved into the seat next to Matt.

"Don't even think of so much as twitching got it Frankie?"

The officer said to the baby faced boy with the black and green hair,
caramel eyes and freckles.  This kid to Matt didn't look bad hell he looked
like a freaking grade four student.  It was then this kids face registered
to him. He was one of the mugs that worked with Mike.  He wondered if this
kid remembered him. He gave the boy a squinting look.

"Carol just here to pass in the release forms, his mom was arrested this
morning and she said he's got the weapon here."

While the officer spoke to the secretary about a locker search and a few
other things the boy looked over at Matt and snarled.

"What ya lookin' at ya fucking fag. Like my pretty eyes?"

The kid was quite crude. Matt gave him the most vicious look. He then
wrote. 'Fuck off asshole" on the paper.

"Oh poor baby can't speak? Must be one of them retards huh?"

Frankie was nasty but he was also stupid to. He didn't realize Matt could
talk if he so chose to. Frankie leaned against him making Matt
uncomfortable. He pushed the boy away from him. He wrote again, he didn't
like using the word he was going to use being he had gay relatives but he
had to get the point across.

"Look who's calling who the fag...Missy pissy with the baby face, back off
boy before I fuck your face up."

He produced the pen knife he always carried and showed the boy beside him
and wrote again

"Who do you thing is gonna get blamed for the weapon, it's my first time
here... YOU'RE the one in cuffs so back off!"

Frankie's eyes registered admiration not fear. "You got balls boy, I like
you."  He snickered. He shook his head and said "Pen me." He wrote
something really fast and folded the paper and shoved it into Matt's
pocket. He whispered

"Go get that and hide it for me and there's a BIG treat in it for you."

He then jumped up and ran from the office Matt squawked in shock as the boy
bolted.  He wasn't sure just what happened but he knew that boy was up to
no good and Matt didn't like him one bit. The officer noticed he had taken
off and flew out the door to to go grab the boy again. It was then the
principal called him in to his office to talk to him.  Matt got up the
drama from Frankie's exit forgotten.  ************************************

He was disappointed in the meeting and Matt still refused to speak. It was
somewhat apparent he was more depressed today than he had been in weeks at
least from what the principal could see. Quinn re-read Matt's note. The boy
in question sitting in front of him looking quite sullen.

"Matt giving a teacher the finger because she asked you to 'speak up and
answer her' isn't a very good way to go about fitting back into the
curriculum here." He sighed,

"I understand how you're feeling about the situation being frustrated and
all but this attitude really has to stop, otherwise I shall have to bring
your uncle into this and it's not something I really wish to do."

Quinn looked over at Matt who just stood up, placed a note on his desk and
walked out the door.  He picked up the note and looked at it.

All it had was "I'm done" Quinn didn't understand what he meant over the
"I'm done" note but he picked up the phone and called Jeff to talk to
him. It was going to be a long week Quinn just had a funny feeling this
wasn't going to get any better.

*************************************

He walked down the hall holding his books,
watching. Staring. Listening. Absorbing everything, the taunts, the stares,
the whispers. He knew they either pitied his loss or they taunted it
because he wouldn't speak anymore. He walked into the computer room and
flicked on a machine.  He always come here after school or at lunch time if
he had nothing better to do. He wrote as he usually did. One hour
everyday. He placed his student card into his pocket and head the rustling
of paper. He looked and realized that the note that the nasty Frankie kid
had written to him was still there. He pulled it out and read it and his
eyes got wide. He read it again and picked up his books. He turned off the
computer and made his way down the halls he tried to blend in. Not much
luck when so many knew who he was. He made it to the basement of the school
away from prying eyes. He slipped out the back service door and walked
across the baseball field and to the dugouts. He walked to the spot that
was written in the note and pushed away the board on the ground. Sure
enough under that board in the sand was a hole, it held a wooden box. Matt
picked it up. It was heavy. He opened it and he got the surprise that
Frankie asked him to hide for him. He beamed. He knew this was a good way
to get what he wanted now. He very carefully took the precious cargo from
the box and put it in his kit bag and placed the box back where it was
recovering it. He left with Frankie's treasure and returned the same way he
had come out. He made it to his locker and flipped the latch opened and
placed Frankie's precious treasure into his own locker. This little trinket
with its well designed wooden handle would make for a great way to get
Frankie to do a few tricks he wouldn't do without it. Mat chuckled to
himself he knew returning to school was a good choice. He went home happier
than he had been in days, a total opposite to what Quinn had relayed to
Jeff only a few hours earlier. Jeff met him at the door to talk to him and
Matt only hugged his uncle and smiled.

"I'm ok." He said so quietly Jeff thought he was hearing things. Jeff was
stunned. Matt spoke.

"Oh my god! Matt! You're speaking!"

Matt sighed, his uncle was so happy, hell he could see he was thrilled.
Jeff hugged his nephew. Matt just smiled. He spent the supper evening
speaking very little but speaking none the less, and very quietly. Matt
figured a small vocal sacrifice was enough to keep his uncle happy. Future
disappointment would always over rule his spoken words soon enough, it
never failed. He wondered if his plans for returning to school would go
unnoticed by Mani. He was glad he went back.  Matt looked at Jeff, his head
lowered he spoke again.

"I will not speak to those who look down on me uncle. I will not speak
unless it's important.  Please respect my wishes."

With that he placed a note he had already written and he got up and walked
out of the room.  Jeff was a bit disappointed but happy at the same
time. He understood Matt's wishes but the reasoning is what confused
him. He walked over to the coffee table and bent over and retrieved the
note Matt has left and opened it.

'I've gone to spend time with Zack.'

Jeff was kind of surprised he left a note about that instead of just
speaking to him.  He looked out the window to see Matt bike away. He leaned
against the frame of the window and hoped his nephew was really as ok as he
said he was.

**********************************

It took Matt thirty minutes to bike to Mani and Aikrii's place and when he
got there he was anxious to see Zack. He leaned his bike up against the
wall under the bathroom window area and walked to the front door. He went
to knock when the door opened unexpectedly.

"Oh!" he said startled.

"Matt?" Mani said he was shocked to see the boy there he wasn't expecting
him he in fact was going to go for a walk with Zack.

"I'm sorry I didn't call, I wanted to see Zack" He said in a whisper as he
looked over at Zack in the stroller.  Mani was bowled over, but kept his
emotional shout for joy to himself. He was so happy to hear him speaking
again.

"Sure come with us, we were just going to go for a walk"

Mani pulled the house door closed and then pushed the stroller out onto the
drive way as he waited for Matt to join them.


"Can I carry him?" Matt asked

Mani didn't have an issue with it and he'd still take the stroller in case
Matt got tired. "Sure if you want"

He unstrapped the little fella and passed Zack to Matt and then proceeded
to walk with Matt still pushing a now empty stroller.

"I'll talk to you Mani, I'll talk to Jeff, but I won't say anything if it's
not important enough for an answer and I will not speak up when I am
threatened. I really only came to see Zack because I needed to feel full
again." He smiled down at the infant.

"My heart felt empty today so I needed to be here." his response was sullen
but words that Mani was pleased to hear since he was vocalizing his
feelings and giving them words.  It was always a step in the right
direction when that happened with ones he worked with.

"Matt, are you writing when you feel depressed like I suggested?" Mani
asked him knowing the answer would be yes but he wanted to be sure that he
would still speak. Matt didn't thou.  True to his word he refused to answer
something that wasn't important enough.

"I'm sorry, I guess it's not important enough to answer when I know the
answer is already a yes right?"

Matt nodded in agreement. He then snuggled the baby into his arms and
started to hum to him again a song about remembering only this one was
Sarah McLanahan's 'Will you remember me'. Mani smiled as the young fella
hummed the tune. They walked for a good forty minutes before Matt put Zack
back into his stroller and then asked to push him. Mani asked him how
school was going and Matt just shrugged his shoulders. "It's school." he
answered. "But I am happy to be there, even if people stare or pity me."

Mani looked over at him. "Do you really think they think this?"

Matt looked at him like his question was the stupidest thing he could have
asked.  Then very quietly he spoke.

"The boys who killed Becky walk the halls of the very school I attend Mani,
One was hauled into the office in handcuffs because he got into trouble
with the police. He'll be out again come tomorrow."

He looked at his councilor

"Of course people pity me, they stare and wonder why I am still there. I
hear things in the bathroom, people wondering how come the boys who tired
to kill me haven't made the attempt to finish it. I hear rumors that they
are planning to anyway."

He ran his hands through his hair.

"I hear lots when I don't speak. I think more." He stopped and
sighed. "Sometimes I wonder why I lived.  Then I see Zack. I am here
because I am to make sure those boys never hurt him again, they already did
once by taking his mom away." he hung his head frustrated and missing
Becky.

"It's just not fair but things will work out they always do don't they
Mani, even you said fate has a odd way of making things balanced, or right"

'I'm sure things will work out just fine Matt." Mani said he placed his arm
over the little fellas shoulder and they walked back to Mani's home. They
chatted and it made Mani feel better about him speaking again.
**********************************


He got out of the car. He waved good bye to Mani who had drove him home and
dropped off his bike. The time he spent with Zack was cherished. He had
written in Zack's baby book before he left. He never had done that before
but he did because he felt it was the right thing to do, he just hoped Mani
didn't get too upset over it all when he found out. He spotted his uncle
who had walked out the door and stood there with his hands in his
pocket. His uncle was a nice guy. Matt felt he looked a lot like him or
that maybe Jeff would have looked him him when he was younger.

"Hi, how was your visit" he asked his nephew.

"A moment for Mani to remember" Matt said,

as he put his bike against the shed before joining his uncle on the porch
of his home.

"I'm tired" He hugged his uncle tightly.

"Thanks and sorry." Matt let go and walked away to his room slowly. Jeff
was a bit confused but thought about Matt's words, maybe he thanked him for
being understanding and maybe the apology was for the apparent stress that
Matt's depression had on the whole house. Jeff scratched his head it wasn't
like it was necessary thou, Jeff had to take the good and the bad it's just
how things were. Still standing out on the porch he looked up at the sky as
the dark crept in, the fall was making the days shorter but the evenings
were beautiful.  Kolten walked out then and slid his arm around Jeff's
waist. He placed an arm over his shoulder.

"He's speaking I see." Kolten said

"Yes, but only when he feels like it. I have no intentions of pushing it."

Jeff said as he walked with Kolten over to the porch swing. They
sat. Kolten leaned against him tucking his legs up beside him.

"You think thats the best thing?" He asked Jeff.

"For now." He sighed "All any of us can do is our best and hope that Fate
does make sure things balance out like he pointed out."

"Have I told you I love you today?" Kolten said as he looked over at Jeff.

"No, but thanks I did need that." Jeff hugged him and leaned his head
against Kolten's

"I love you to, thanks for being here." Jeff had his hand and stroked his
palm. Kolten smiled.

"Come on hun I think it's time we crashed." They did so quietly.

All the while Fate watched the home where sorrow slept. He crept to the
source and frowned.  He wanted to change the outcome he really did but his
big brother future refused to budge his little sister destiny also said she
couldn't do anything either. They all had to agree on the balance and this
time fate lost out and he'd once again be blamed for the outcome.  He
frowned. He stroked Matt's soul and took the hope he had in it and floated
off.  Even if he couldn't save him he would make sure that his siblings
wouldn't screw up Zack's life. He would made sure all of Matt's hopes went
to him. Becky's future was taken away, Matt's had a destiny as well be
dammed if anyone would mess with this child he had a promise to keep to
Aikrii and his family and this little boy was part of it.

***********************************************

He woke that morning. He heard nothing. He moved quickly. He felt
nothing. He moved quietly.  He wanted for nothing. He was free now. He made
it to his locker and grabbed his stuff.  He watched quietly as the masses
walked by. Frankie flicked by winking and making kissie faces calling him
his pansy.

"Meet me I know you got it."

Frankie shouted back as his other friend yanked on his arm. Matt knew where
they would go.  He knew he would be in trouble, but he didn't care
anymore. He waited for the bell.  Everyone was now in their class. He
walked slowly to the spot he would meet them.

Frankie cornered him first. "I knew you'd come pretty boy."

he sneered and grabbed Matt's bag. Matt only smirked as Frankie rifled
through the bag only to come up short on what he was looking for.

"Where is it pretty boy?" He stood slowly looking at Matt.

"Not so brave now are you." Matt said coldly.

"Oh fuck!" Frankie's friend who had recognized Matt knew now that the boy
wasn't retarded from the beating like that had heard. Jamie grabbed
Frankie.

"You shouldn't never had told him to get it for you!" he yelled.

"Come on Matt, it was an accident. We had to do what Mike said, if not we'd
have been toast."

"So you killed my girlfriend and beat me so bad I couldn't bear to speak
for nearly two months?"

He walked forward as they backed up. The two who had did the damage were
trying to get into the open.

"You smashed in my skull I had to have three surgeries to fix the damage, I
still get headaches so bad I pass out."

Matt reached behind his back and felt the wooden handle. He tugged out the
precious object Frankie wanted hidden so badly. Now Matt had the one thing
that had gotten these two boys off from the murder of his girlfriend.  The
very gun Jamie had used to shoot her with. He held the weight. It was a
beautiful gun. An old time western one with a very nice carved wooden
handle. He lifted it and pointed it at Jamie.

"You shot her so you go first. This will fix one wrong"

Matt didn't even think he just pulled the trigger and watched the boy hit
the floor.  The gun didn't feel like anything in his hands it recoiled and
Matt just looked at it and with Frankie staring in total shock he turned
the weapon on the other boy.

"No man don't do this." He cried as he pissed his pants the yellow ribbon
of urine running down his leg and across the floor

"You didn't give me a chance to speak, neither of you let her run, why
should I give you anything more?"

Frankie screamed as he watched the trigger get slowly pulled. He went down
so easily. Matt looked at the blood. He watched Frankie gurgle and sputter,
pink foaming bubbles flowed out of his mouth as he tried to speak. Matt
stuck his finger into the hole in Frankie's chest making him scream without
sound.

"Now we're even!" He got up and noticed that there was a police man and the
principal was standing by them they were speaking to him. He couldn't
really hear anything except the rush of blood in his own head. Matt raised
the gun and the officer reacted by screaming

"Drop the gun!" Matt still couldn't hear him. He pointed the gun to his own
head. The last thing he saw was the fear on his uncle's face as he pulled
the trigger, taking his own life.  ****************************************


NO! MATT!! NO!!! NO!!! Jeff screamed as Kolten and Quinn pulled him back
from the scene.

"Jeff he's gone, there's nothing you can do!"

Kolten was crying to but trying his damnedest to keep Jeff from the middle
of the mess that had played out in the schools back mud room.

Police had swarmed the place. Students were released and sent home. News
media were now in the fray of things and people were checking out web pages
and other things that Matt had done trying to dig up as much dirt as they
could to make him look like the crazy bad kid in all of this mess. It was
Mani would found the truth scrawled in Zack's baby book a week later.


Chapter 20 -- Here's to the future
*****************************

The funeral was over, and another child was gone from their family. Aikrii
was holding up pretty well through most of it, but Mani was a mess because
he felt it was his fault for not seeing the signs. He wasn't sleeping all
that great either and it made for a tense time at home. On Jeff's end
Janice blamed Jeff for the mess and Jeff blamed himself as well but Kolten
was the strength there and he was the one who helped Jeff understand it's
not his fault no one could read Matt's thoughts and no one knew just what
his medications had done to him either. The news on TV tried to make Matt
seem like a messed up kid but it was Matt's family and close friends,
teachers and more who corrected the misconceptions on who the real Matt
Wonder's was.

Mani was watching one such news piece when Aikrii sat beside him. They both
listened to what was being said.

"He was a great kid, he was one of the strongest swimmers in our group when
we were all together, he loved Becky and those boys took away the one thing
he loved more than swimming."

Jayed's face showed the remorse of a friend who missed someone she cared
about, she was standing beside John who put in his own words.

"People who think he was bad are wrong, he was a good guy he just did what
others couldn't do, he got justice his own way and I can't say I don't
blame him one bit!"

It was apparent John was mad at the news he'd been hearing. One of Matt's
teachers threw her own words in.

"A beautiful boy who lost his voice when he lost his love, His heart was
shattered by the actions of two who felt drugs and ill gotten gains was the
way to go, Matt tried to protect the students here at this school by
turning them in. Then in a tragic turn of events these two were released
due to a poorly set young offenders act, they were allowed to take away the
only thing he cared about. It's a shame that the only way he felt he could
keep the school and everyone else safe was to remove everyone from the
picture. Far as I'm concerned I will miss this wonderful child.  He did
what he thought was right."

She walked away with Jayed and John. The news reporter who continued on
with the story. Mani looked at the TV and spoke.

"Is it always when one is gone that the 'good words' are spoken of that
person?"

He sighed it had been a week and he was still feeling so shitty. Aikrii
reached out to him and pulled him back and hugged him.

"It's not your fault remember, he made his choices. He did what he had to
do Mani. You couldn't have known what he was thinking you didn't live in
his head."

He hugged Mani harder. "You're a good person for being there for him when
he needed you. Now he's with Becky."

"I just feel so bad about this all, poor Jeff and Kolten, Sandy is
devastated and no one has told Jeff's dad yet, I think the blow would kill
him. I wish none of this had ever happened, I was hoping the connection to
Zack would have helped."

He sighed and got up. He walked over to Zack who was sleeping in the play
pen looking down at the beautiful baby boy he sighed again and looked over
at Aikrii.

"I am trying so hard to protect other peoples kids, what the hell makes me
think I'm going to do any better with Zack if Matt's one of my examples?"
Aikrii was stunned to hear Mani speak like this.

"You know what your a great person and there's proof of this."

Aikrii got up and walked over to the book shelf. He pulled out Zack's baby
book and flicked to the first pages of Becky's written words.

"Mani and Aikrii are such a perfect dads, they love you so much Zack, I can
picture you guys in years to come working on your first car, or them
helping you get ready for your first date.  I thank god every day for
bringing these people into our lives."

He showed Mani her words. "See..." He waited to see what Mani would say but
he just sighed.

Aikrii put the baby book down on the couch and took Mani's face into his
hands looking into his depressed violet eyes.

"She trusted us before she passed, she loved us for who we are flaws and
all, she knew back then we will do right with all we can for Zack so stop
questioning the what ifs. All anyone expects is for us to do our best." He
kissed Mani on his forehead.

"No one expects perfection, no parent or person is perfect. We wanted
children and this is how things are. We have to take the good with the bad
and hope we do right by Zack just like Becky trusted us to do."

Mani looked at his loving hubby; who with sad eyes said the words he never
thought he'd ever hear one of the strongest men he's ever known say.

"I'm scared to fail Aikrii." He put his head down on Aikrii's shoulder and
sobbed, not just for Matt but for Becky to and the thoughts that he might
not be good enough for Zack.  Aikrii thought a moment and pondered his
words before realizing the one thing even Mani himself would say. He very
gently pushed Mani off his shoulder and looked at him.

"I love you, you know this right?"

"Yes" Mani said.

"So if you feel you've failed before we even get started does this means I
failed to?"

Aikrii kept looking into his eyes searching his hubby's eyes for an answer
he was hoping Mani would find on his own.

"No you didn't fail."

"Don't you mean WE...and Why not?" Aikrii looked at him with much
seriousness.

"You can't fail something you didn't start." Mani said.

"BINGO! WE haven't even started to really raise Zack yet dear, how can you
feel WE failed if WE haven't even started?"

Aikrii stressed that they were a team. He saw the shock in Mani's eyes. The
one person who should have seen this was coming to the realization that
Aikrii was right and that the best was only beginning.

"Dammit, I'm sorry hun, you've been so patient with me." he hugged Aikrii
tightly.

"I still feel shitty over this thou."

"The sorrow is expected Mani, but you of all people should know that's
expected all we can do is our best. Even you taught me this, and the only
way we can fail is if we don't even start or bother trying."

He hugged Mani back who was relaxing now, Mani was realizing that Aikrii
was learning to be stronger though the very teachings and understanding he
himself gave to Aikrii over the time they had been together. He smiled as
Aikrii continued.

"I'm not about to give up before I started just because I'm scared of what
'might happen', I love our son way too much to even consider that option
and I much rather do it together with you than alone"

Aikrii smiled back at him and Mani happily kissed him

"You know you're right and I love you for that. Thanks for bringing me back
to the ground, I needed that." He hugged him tightly both now smiling with
comfort knowing they had each other to lean on when things got tough. Zack
then made his obvious wakeful presents known to them. Mani chuckled and
picked him up. They both sat on the couch with Zack once they got a bottle
for him and Mani was flicking through his baby book when he came across the
words Matt had written and it sent a shiver through him.

'I am sitting today while I am here with you and I keep pondering a promise
I made to your mother Zack.  To always look out for you. I loved her very
much and it hurts me to no end knowing I can never be with her again. I see
two people in my life who took your mother out of ours. I think it's time I
protected you from those people. Please do not ever blame yourself when you
get older for what I do to make things justified, it's just my way of
making the world right. I will always love you.  I hope Aikrii and Mani can
forgive me for whatever ends up happening since I'm still not too sure how
things will turn out. Should I not walk away from all of this I will give
Becky a hug from you all.  God bless you little boy, you got two wonderful
people in your life and I know Aikrii and Mani will turn you into a
wonderful person when you grow up. Your mom picked the best ones for you
because she trusts them so you should always do the same ok. - Matt.'

Mani passed it over to Aikrii who read it to. They both were shocked. Matt
had somewhat planned the events that lead up to his apparently unplanned
suicide.

"I don't think he planned on killing himself." Mani said once he reread the
words Matt had left behind.

"Poetic justice as far as I'm concerned." Aikrii said knowing that from
news footage that the gun Matt had used was the same one that had killed
Becky. They also knew that Frankie who was one of the two who was involved
in Becky's death had given Matt the gun, but apparently Frankie didn't know
who Matt was at the time. Mani had to agree with Aikrii thou ironic as it
was, justice was served but at an expense no one had ever expected.

Aikrii sighed and looked at his son. You have three guardian angels looking
over you now, I'm sure of it.  He kissed his head as he babbled and all
three snuggled on the couch enjoying each others company.
***********************************************

He awoke sort of groggy but in a good mood, he looked over and Selina was
still sleeping. He felt so blessed being able to have the second chance he
had been given with her. He slid closer to her and snuggled against her.

"Mmm," She murmured "Morning hunny." she said as she rolled over in his
arms and looked at him.  He kissed her nose making her giggle.

"Good morning sunshine, how did you sleep?" Nye asked her.

"I slept ok." She stretched and her feet came in contact with a wet cold
nose.

"AHH!" She gasped as she pulled back her feet and giggled. "Flip your nose
is freezing!"

Nye looked down at his dog who was just staring at Selina for putting her
foot on his nose, he was still wagging his tail thou. Nye chuckled then
looked back at Selina

"I'm glad that amuses you hun" She said as she pushed his hair back from
his face. Nye slid up and straddled over her looking down.

"Watching you smile amuses me to." He said as he lowered his lips to hers
making her grin under him. Her arms wrapping around his neck and fingers
flow through his hair.

He pulled back and looked at her smiling and said "Thank you beautiful"

"For what?" she said

"Giving this broken heart a second chance at loving a wonderful person such
as yourself" he said

She smiled and whispered "Anytime my love, you needed me as much as I
needed you thou so remember that."

"Ahh right the two souls who had half meeting to become one. I seem to
recall someone saying this."

She chuckled at the words that Cleo had put in one of her diary entries,
the last few months before her diary stopped working both read them
together each night. It had put both of their lives in perspective and
Selina appreciated all that Cleo had done for them. It was a surprise to
her that she still had the spiritual connection she did with her. She
looked at Nye and asked him.

"So when do you want to actually get married?"

She had asked him this before and yet there wasn't a date set yet. He
pondered a moment and looked at her.

"What would you think is a good day?" He asked her

"I asked you now stop flitting around on the question." She pushed herself
back so she was looking at him better.

He smirked and looked at her and said "How about next year..." he pauses
and waits for her to get mad about his delay, he so loved teasing her. He
smiles as he hums.

"Nye!" she says pulling his hand from his face. He giggles. "Ok! Ok!" He
puts his hands up in defense "Don't beat me now." He chuckles
again. "January sixteenth" he responded making her smile

"Great a date now I can tell Charlene" She laughed as he looked at her
confused.

"Why does she need the date?" he asked.

"Can't make it down if she has no idea when it is, besides I don't want her
planning her wedding near ours you know." She chuckled when Nye's eyes
bugged out.

"Since when did Duncan propose to her?" Nye asked.

"He hasn't yet but plans on it tonight, I was talking to him yesterday
about the ring I helped him pick out."  She said laughing again at his
shocked look.

"Yes I helped him, I want to see my aunt happy and I think Duncan can do
that for her."

She smiled again and ran her finger along his jaw and purred sweetness to
him. She leaned in and kissed his jaw line. He groaned and leaned his head
back letting her closer to his neck. She nipped him and he gasped.

"Good god Selina..." He whispered huskily as she nibbled making him
shiver. She always did have a way with him when she was loving him. She
giggled and ran and finger seductively down his chest.  He shivered again
as he reached for her hand and hung on to it close to his heart.  He leaned
in and against her making her lean back further into the feathery pillows.

"You drive me wild you know that right?"

He said looking into her beautiful blue eyes as he ran his knuckles of his
free hand across her jaw line and down her neck and across her breast. She
gasped as her nipple puckered from the contact and goosebumps danced along
her skin. He watched and smiled at the reaction he could get from her body.
He kissed the pink peak and felt her squirm as fingers snaked through his
hair.

"Mmmm..." Her vocals were limited at the moment but he could fix that
easily enough and he proceeded to do so by sucking on that delicate pink
bud.

"Ahhh..." She arched and pulled his hair he chuckled heartily as he
continued to tantalize her sensitive skin.  Her whole body tingled with the
wondrous sensation he was coaxing from her body, his fingers caressed and
ran up the side of her breast and up her arm and to her fingers twining his
with her own. He crept forward and kissed her soundly as he met her heated
need with his own. Pushing ahead she felt the wanted intrusion and panted
in delight as he joined them as one, she arched as they danced together,
sensual bliss bringing them closer to the brink they were climbing
together. A throaty growl made Selina realize he was peaking and she
gripped his forearms as he picked up his pace she locked her legs and hung
on as he brought her to the top, she arched again screaming his name as she
climaxed her quivering body bringing him up and over the top, he to shouted
in euphoric release, releasing his liquid heat into her body. He was sated
now and slowed his pace gently setting on top of her, breathing in rapid
succession laying kisses on her face in adoration.  She glowed with love
for him and smiled as they floated back to earth. Both now satisfied they
drifted back into slumber wrapped in each others arms. She dreamed, Cleo
came to visit again and she was smiling her best smile. Selina noticed
something different about Cleo. She had wings now and Selina was impressed
and asked her why she had wings now.

"I earned them through you my friend." Cleo said kissing her forehead.

"I am here to thank you and bless your union with Nye. I will be around for
your wedding but for now I am here as a last visit you two are strong now
and I am pleased to say you no longer need my guidance."

She looked down at her friend and Selina looked back a bit saddened at the
news but happy to know that Cleo would be moving on. "I will always miss
you." Selina said with a tear in here eye.

"As I will you my dear, please pass on my love to Nye and the rest, Oh and
tell Mani and Aikrii to read their son's baby book." Cleo chuckled.

"What for?" Selina asked looking confused "Because He left a message for
them."

Selina followed her pointing finger and who did she see but Matt descending
from the heavens.

"Matt! Oh my Matt!." She cried and ran forward to him and hugged him. He
looked amazing with wings but they weren't like Cleo's. They were Earth
tone brown.

"Matt how come your wings are brown?" She asked as she looked over at Cleo
who's wings were a white blue and shimmery.

"I killed someone Selina, justifiably yes...but I still killed someone and
then I killed myself...  I still do not understand why I did it I just
did. So there for this makes me a fallen angel"

Selina looked confused. "Huh?"

"Heaven is a misconception Selina, Everyone dies yes. But not everyone gets
their wings, not everyone goes to heaven or hell right away. Some need to
earn redemption. Others feel the need to help their earth bound families to
move on with life and then there are others like me. We're still good just
things ended badly.  So if I want after a year of limbo servitude I can
return and try again. My soul will be one with another who has lost the
will to go on, or with one who is young and pure of heart and in need of
guidance as they grow" He looked at her and smiled.

"So like a rebirth or reincarnation." She said mulling over the concept

"Actually it's called a Consoul, where two souls connect as one. I will
merge with someone who has lost the will to move on but should move on or
with one who is young of heart and in need of guidance as they grow and
thats because Fate says it's so and brother Future and sister Destine will
it to be such. In doing so I am giving that person a second lease on life
many speak about. Thing is they are getting that second lease and so am I."

He impressed her with his new found knowledge and she was impressed to
learn this to. Being a spiritual person she now realized why she was able
to pick up on souls as easily as she did. Most good 'fallens' were most
likely people who are reborn into the ones she loves now and respect as her
family.

"I understand now." Selina smiled again and held his hand. "How will I know
you've moved back?"

Her question was what made Cleo step forward.

"Matt has chosen to serve his one year as a guide for you in my place. Your
new connection will be with him and then Becky who will be here after he's
gone back earth bound."

Cleo waited she could see the questions already

"How come I don't get to see Becky first?" She asked and Cleo knew this was
going to be one of her questions.

"Becky was a mother, in being one she sacrifices a bit of her own soul to
her child. It takes a lot of time for one to become whole again. She is in
a mending period for now. Once she's healed then you shall see her again
but she can only be here if she has a full soul."

"Oh I didn't know that. I thought where Matt was here...she'd be here to."
Selina was a bit disappointed.

"Like I said, Heaven and Hell is over rated Selina, I like what I see here
and how it works, it's just too bad no one knows how it really works and
trying would make you an outcast."  Matt chuckled at the ironic thought
behind his comment but it was true.

"Once I spend my year here I get to return I have asked to be the guiding
soul to Zack."  His statement was a shock to her but a welcomed
though. Matt would live on in Zack's soul.

"WOW!" was all she could say.

Matt blushed "I was lucky to get it considering I should have been turned
down, but I was told because of the words I left Zack in his baby book I
should be the one to guide him proper so he doesn't make the same mistakes
I did."

"I think you'll do an excellent job" Selina said to him. She reached for
his hand and walked with him It was different being the only non spiritual
yet spiritual being amongst the angels. Matt looked at her and gave her
hand a squeeze

"It's time to go back. Remember the baby book ok." He kissed her forehead
this time, She watched Cleo fly away waving and smiling and then Matt
faded. She could hear the whispers of thank you on the wind.  Smiling
Selina knew it was time to awaken and did so on her own. She looked up at
the sunbeam floating across her room to the floor to neatly rest on the
edge of her desk where she had her round glasses sitting on her book she
was reading yesterday. Looking at it she noticed at the seam that her
glasses let a shadow fall which created a heart at the seams. It was
priceless to her eyes.

She rolled over and looked at her beautiful husband to be. Kissing his
forehead she gingerly removed herself from their bed and padded out the
door of their room and down to the house phone. Picking it up she called
out and asked for Aikrii. She filled them in on details of her dream and
was happy to know they had already found what Cleo had mentioned which she
was happy to know. She let him go and rested against the counter and
whispered to the heavens "Thank you Cleo and welcome back Matt"

She hugged herself as she watched out the window, with a cup of coffee in
her hand. Deer walked by and looked in at her. A blue Jay flitted by and
Cardinals also called out to their songs. It was getting cooler but it was
so very nice. She heard Nye upstairs moving about. He came down to greet
her and to get some coffee Snuggling up in behind her he asked her if she
had picked out her dress yet for the wedding since she had asked about the
date and all. She confirmed she had. He was happy to hear this since it was
now creeping on to the beginning of September and he didn't want to be
rushing to get their plans done.

"Is four months enough time my love?"

he asked her as he held onto her waist and rocked with her while watching
the fauna stroll by in their yard.

"Yes baby four months is plenty of time." She turned and kissed him and
said

"If you wanted I could have things done by tomorrow." She giggled as his
eyes got wide.

"You wanna marry me that fast?" He said chuckling.

"Sure why not, your a dream given to me by an angel and everyone knows
angels are always right."

She snuggled in knowing that her 'angels' had many plans for the immediate
future and she was looking forward to all that was to come and knowing that
Matt's soul would keep Zack on the 'straight and narrow path' as he grew up
preventing mistakes of repeated history was one she was hoping to be able
to watch for many years to come with Nye at her side. Her urge to paint
came over her and she kissed him and said one word.

"Painting" and he knew it was time to let her do her magic. He let her go
and they started this new day knowing that there was a future of many more
to come.

******************************************************

This is the end to book three but book 4 will continue on with Sam and
Xaviers story. and book 5 continues on with Aikrii and mani and how raising
a child can be a beautiful yet trying time.  I hope all my readers enjoyed
what's been posted so far.

This series is published on line books 1-3 (4 in the works) if intrested
mail Lila for the direct link to my series main web site so you can read it
all

lila_is@live.ca