Tripod Chapter 37

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Tripod - Chapter 37

"What if no one likes me? What if they're like the kids at my old school and just think I'm some freak from another planet?"

"Chill, Asher. My friends already love you."

"Maybe they just say that `cause they're your friends. The others are just coming `cause you asked for a favor to help out the weird kid."

"Asher, this isn't a pity party. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You're smart, funny, and even though you're my brother, I gotta say, you're pretty cute, too. You'll do fine. Yeah, maybe these kids are here because my friends asked them to come over. But they know your story and they want to help you. No one was bribed to come here unless you think free pizza and one of my cakes is a bribe. They're here for you."

Asher took a deep breath and looked at himself in the hallway mirror for the tenth time that morning. He ran his fingers through his dark brown hair, trying to get the perfect it-looks-like-I-just-woke-up-but-it-took-an-hour-to-get-everything-awesome look. He was wearing one of the outfits that Ashley helped to style for him.

"Who's coming again? I don't want to mess up."

"Brandon, Darius, Braden..."

"Not just them," Asher interrupted, "I wanna know about the kids I haven't met."

"OK, first let me finish with the ones you know. There's Connor and his boyfriend Seán from the gymnastics team..."

"The boy with the nice butt," Asher giggled, "I met them both at the Rainbow Center when I met you."

"Mounds of perfection. That's Seán," I laughed. "And now, the ones you don't know: Seán's twin sisters Maeve and Aoife who, according to Seán, know everything about celebrities, shows, and movies. There's Eddie the world's nicest boy genius and his sister Reggie who's as nice as Eddie and super smart, too; Darius's sister Ariana, who knows a lot about music; and there are a couple of gay kids who are friends of Ariana but who go to our school. I don't really know them. They're a couple of years younger than me."

It was the Sunday before Christmas, a typical December day in the Midwest--intensely cold and cloudy, perfect for hanging out inside. Asher's coming-out party was scheduled to start at 12:30.

I'd asked Brandon and Braden to arrive a little early. I wanted Asher to have some people that he already knew with him before the unknowns rolled in. Brandon picked me up in his usual embrace. Braden made a beeline for Asher and they gave each other a bear hug.

"So, ready for your introduction to high school society?" Brandon asked.

"Oh, God! I'm so nervous," Asher said. "You make it sound like I'm being introduced to the royal family. But I guess I'm open to meeting a handsome prince."

"You look nice," Braden volunteered.

Asher blushed and broke into an intense smile, scooping up the terse compliment from his handsome, blond friend like a pearl from an oyster. Even though there was nothing romantic between the two, it was clear that Braden and Asher had a mutual admiration society going.

Seán and his contingent arrived right on time at 12:30. Mom opened the door and ushered them in. As she took their coats to hang them up in the entryway closet, I caught Asher glancing over to check out Seán's butt. He tried to be discreet but his eyes widened ever so slightly as they focused on the target. Connor glanced over at us at that exact instant and one corner of his mouth curled up into a sly grin.

While the others were still handing off their outwear to Mom, Connor walked toward us, looked Asher in the eyes, and said, "I can see you already know prime beef when you see it."

Asher turned beet red. "I'm really sorry. I didn't mean..."

"Dude, Seán's ass is legend. I don't mind. And Seán's used to it. Enjoy the view!" Connor reached out for a fist bump. Asher responded but avoided eye contact.

Seán, Maeve, and Aiofe spotted Connor and walked over to join the group.

"Why'd you run away so quick, KBB? Did Seán forget to shower?" Maeve asked snarkily.

Asher looked confused, "Are those your initials? Do you spell Connor with a K?"

Connor laughed, "No. It's Connor with a `C.' My last name is Kim. They call me KBB because they think I look like I'm in a Korean Boy Band."

"Is that good?" Asher asked sheepishly.

"Oh, jeez. We've got work to do," Aiofe said. "By the way, the best way to tell Maeve and me apart is that I've got a freckle on the tip of my right ear and Maeve doesn't. But we usually wear our hair down, so you're screwed." She and Maeve let out a screechy laugh that caused us all to wince.

"Take your nails off of the blackboard," Seán implored.

"We're just kidding, Seán," Maeve interjected, "Asher's kinda hot, actually. Too bad he plays for your team. We'll be gentle. We've already got his homework assignments prepared. Lots of binge-watching. He can text us the quiz answers over the break."

"You look pretty normal," Aoife began. "How come you don't know anything? You a `special needs' kid?"

"Aiofe!" Seán said annoyed. "Don't be basic."

"I come from a really religious background," Asher said. "We weren't allowed to watch much on TV and I had no internet. Jaime and my new mom and dad have shown me some fun shows and videos, but I guess Seán thinks you guys are experts on what's popular now."

"Yeah, Seán did tell us you got thrown out of your house for being gay," Maeve said. "That's so last millennium. I thought our parents were losers that way but they surprised us when Seán came out. Not like, `Awesome, son! Go suck lotsa cock!' but they were respectful."

Seán blushed. "You two are gonna give Mom and Dad a nervous breakdown."

"That's the plan!" Maeve and Aoife screamed in unison.

"We know Brandon, but who's this young hottie? Asher's boyfriend?" Aoife asked.

"Maeve!" Seán moaned.

"This is my brother Braden," Brandon volunteered.

"Hey," Braden mumbled and smiled weakly.

"You gay, too?" Aoife asked.

"That's enough!" Seán screamed, surprising all of us.

"Nah, I like girls," Braden volunteered, "Asher's my friend though. We have a lot in common and `cause he's gay, we'll never have to fight over someone we both want to hook up with."

We all laughed and Brandon broke into a huge smile, clearly proud of his brother's response to Seán's sisters' intrusive questions.

"It's fucking frigid outside, Jaime. Got any coffee?" Maeve asked.

"Sure. We can make some. Hey, Mom, can you make a pot of coffee?"

Mom gave me a thumbs-up from the kitchen. Maeve and Aoife headed to the kitchen to chat up my mom and wait for the coffee.

By then, Darius and Ariana had arrived with two other kids in tow. Darius grabbed Ariana's and the other kids' coats and hung them up, already feeling like one of my family members, not waiting to be invited.

All four walked over to us. The first of the two new kids was a little taller than Darius. His face could be described as kind, the type of kid you'd feel comfortable approaching. He was black with medium-length locks and with a wispy, mustache trying to make itself known on his upper lip. He was dressed in baggy jeans and a gray hoodie. The other kid was tall but a total twink. He was white with a thin and apparently hairless body that had been slipped into a skin-tight body suit. He was accessorized with a silk scarf and platform shoes. Two ice-blue eyes surveyed the room from his boyish face. His short hair had been bleached blond with blue tips added. His nails were painted blue.

Darius planted a kiss on my lips, causing Ariana and the new kids to break into broad smiles.

"Hey, dudes," Darius began, speaking to my group, "this is my sister Ariana."

Then he gestured to the black kid. "This is Ozzie. His pronouns are he/him." And turning to the white kid, "And this is Bentley who uses any and all pronouns, right?"

Bentley waved at us rapidly and nodded, "Yas, queen!"

We all waved hello.

Asher looked uncomfortable.

Darius turned to his crew and gestured toward my group, "This is my boyfriend Jaime. And this is Asher, Seán, Connor, Brandon and I'm guessing that this is Brandon's brother, right?"

"Yup, I'm Braden."

"Do you go to our school?" Ozzie asked.

"Next year," replied Braden.

"Cool," Ozzie said, "Asher, what kind of stuff do you like? I hear we're kinda starting from scratch. Where do you come from?"

"I'm from here. Born in Chicago. Grew up in a religious community. I never really got to see or do anything that a regular kid my age would do, so I guess I don't really know what I like yet. I know I like math but that's probably not gonna get me a lot of friends."

"I really like math, too," Ozzie said, his eyes sparkling.

"Oh, God," Bentley began, "Another gay nerd. I had hopes for you. You're cute and you dress pretty nice but you'll probably spend your free time with your nose stuck in a book like Ozzie."

Adriana's head whipped around and you could see arrows shooting out of her eyes directed at Bentley.

"Listen, bitch," she seethed, "just because you can recite every song from every pop diva from the last twenty years doesn't make you special. Your parents have given you nothing but support since you put on your first pair of heels at age three. This kid got told he was worse than dead and then thrown out. He's trying to figure things out and we're here to help him, OK? By the way, your manicure is awful and that nail color looks like shit on you."

Bentley looked as though he/she/they had just been kicked in the teeth.

"I'm really sorry. That was really mean of me. I'm not a total asshole, just a bitchy femboy sometimes. Honestly, I was kind of nervous coming here and started to chip off my nail polish. I got bullied a lot and meeting new people makes me stress. But I finally decided last year that I needed to be myself no matter what, and jeans and hoodies just didn't do it for me. So, here I am, feathers and all. By the way, if anyone can get you turned on to some great music, it's Ariana."

"I got bullied and beaten up at my last school for being a Jew. No one knew I was gay. I was looking forward to starting at Evanston West but you think I'll get bullied?"

"Not for being Jewish," Bentley said, "There are a lot of Jewish kids at this school. No issues there. Most gay and lesbian kids get left alone, too. It's harder for trans and non-binary kids but it's a lot better than it used to be. You'll be fine. We'll stick together."

"Can I ask you something?" Asher began. "Please let me know if I'm being rude. I've never really gotten a chance to talk to someone like you. The kids at the Rainbow Center just ignored me. But wouldn't it just be easier to act more like a boy? Do you want to be a girl?"

Our group was getting fidgety, clearly uncomfortable with the questions Asher was asking.

Bentley surveyed the crowd and raised a hand as if to quiet the masses. "It's OK," Bentley responded calmly. "I'm not trans. I don't feel weird about my body. But for me, trying to act like a typical boy feels just like that, I'm acting. It's not me. It feels strange to me. I know, sometimes I look like I'm putting on a show but even when I'm just hanging out, I feel comfortable with girly stuff. I like to paint my nails and dye my hair. I mean sometimes I feel good in jeans and a sweatshirt, but most times I like to dress up, at least a little."

"Do you act like a girl in bed?"

"Asher, you don't ask those kinds of questions," I cautioned, knowing that Asher didn't really know the boundaries yet.

"I'm so sorry," Asher blushed.

"I know you're just curious, and you're not asking to make me feel bad, so I'll tell you. I'm totally vers."

Everyone in our little group tried to be discreet, but you could see the wheels of incredulity spinning wildly.

"Oh, puhlease," Ariana replied, "who are you trying to kid?"

Bentley whipped around and pointed a badly-painted nail right at Ariana. "Zip it, gurrl. I know, you think I'd be a total twink bottom but I like to top, too. Really! I mean it. I'm no slut. I've only been with a couple of guys, but I've tried both top and bottom and I like both.

Bentley turned to Asher and asked, "Has anyone sat you down and explained the difference between sexual orientation, sexual preference, gender identity, and gender expression?"

"No," Asher said, shaking his head.

"Jeez, Jaime, what kind of a brother are you?" Darius teased.

"I guess I'm nothing but a miserable failure," I replied, actually feeling badly that I hadn't taken the time with Asher to talk about it.

Asher leaned over and gave me a hug.

"You're the best brother, Jaime. Don't say that."

Bentley took a deep breath and began, "OK, here it is. Sexual orientation means the gender or genders that you're sexually attracted to. Sexual preference is the stuff you like to do in bed. Gender identity is whether you feel on the inside like a female, male, or somewhere in between and whether you feel OK with the sex parts you were born with. Gender expression is the range of masculinity or femininity that you show to the world.

"I'm a boy who pretty much only likes sex with other boys, so I'm gay. I like any and all sexual positions, so I'm versatile. Believe it or not, I feel like a boy and I'm happy with my penis and body just the way it is, so I'm cisgender. I kind of move around between masculine and feminine. I don't usually wear dresses and I don't wear full makeup, but I'll wear this catsuit and put on eyeliner and nail polish. I guess you'd say I'm gender fluid. Does that help?"

"It helps a lot. That was really nice of you. Thanks," Asher replied.

It was clear that everyone was still kind of shocked that Bentley topped too, but they let it slide.

"Not to change the subject, but I made you a playlist of a lot of different types of music that kids listen to," Ariana volunteered. "Give me your number and I'll send it to you. Pay attention to the names of the artists. If you decide you like someone, check out more of their music, OK?"

"That's amazing!" Asher gushed. "I can't wait."

"We're gonna head into the kitchen to make sure that Maeve and Aiofe aren't getting into trouble," Seán said.

"Grab some pizza while you're there," I replied.

"We're kinda hungry, too," said Brandon. "Lead the way."

Seán, Connor, Brandon, and Braden stopped to say hi to Eddie and Reggie, who'd just arrived, then continued their walk to the kitchen.

Eddie and Reggie spotted us and headed over.

"Sorry we're a little late," Eddie said.

"We were putting up the Christmas stuff and lost track of time," Reggie added. "Hey, Ozzie, I didn't know you'd be here."

"Yeah, Ariana invited us along. Do you two know each other?" Ozzie asked.

Each girl shook her head. I took a minute to introduce everyone to Eddie and Reggie.

"You're boyfriends with Tyler, right?" Ariana asked Eddie. "Darius has been saying nice things about you guys. Is Tyler coming?"

"Nah, he had to work," Eddie said. "He works Friday nights and weekends at the Multiplex."

"Ozzie and I are on the math team together," Reggie said. "Ozzie won the grand prize in the geometry division at our last event. He's rated number one in Cook County."

"There's a math team?" Asher asked. "I'm still working on algebra. I've got a lot of catching up to do but I've got Braden and another great tutor helping me out. Maybe I'd be ready next year to try out."

"That would be amazing!" Ozzie said, just a little too enthusiastically. "I could help you out studying." Asher was clearly having an effect on Ozzie.

"Can you sing? We can always use more boys in the musicals. Lots of gay kids there. The cast parties are fab-u-lous," Bentley volunteered.

"Spoken like a true drama queen," Ariana said.

"Actually, I can sing," Asher replied. "They always said I had a really nice voice in synagogue but I've never really seen a musical before. I have no idea if I'd be any good. I only know Yiddish songs."

"Wanna give us a sample of what you can do?" I asked.

"Jaime! No. I'd be too embarrassed," Asher cringed.

"Come on, Asher. It doesn't matter what the song is. We'd love to hear you," Eddie said, giving Asher's shoulder a squeeze.

The rest nodded their encouragement.

Asher opened his mouth and filled the room with a beautiful, strong tenor. I'd heard worse professionals. We had no idea what the words meant but everyone in the room turned around and stood there with their mouths hanging open. The song was clearly full of love and the melody, really emotional.

"Asher, what the fuck was that? Where did it come from?" I asked.

"I'm sorry. Was it really that bad?" Asher winced.

"It was amazing! Where'd you learn to sing like that?" Bentley screamed.

"I've just always liked to sing but never sang for anyone here because I only know Yiddish songs and figured you wouldn't like them."

"What's the song about?" Eddie asked.

"It's about a boy who's gone away to study at the yeshiva and how much he loves his family and misses them. I can kind of relate," Asher said, a small tear forming at the corner of one eye.

"I had no idea what you were saying but I felt everything. You could get any part in any musical you wanted," Bentley said.

"I'm really hungry. Can we go eat now?" Asher asked, trying to divert attention from himself.

We all headed into the kitchen to grab some pizza. When we'd all eaten our fill, Asher invited the younger kids down to his room to hang out and play video games.

The older kids stayed behind in the kitchen.

"Jaime, this was an amazing idea. Asher looks like he's having a blast," Mom said.

"I had a lot of help," I replied.

"Thanks to all of you," Mom added, "I know it's a busy time of year and you took time to help Asher out," which brought on lots of smiles and nods from my friends.

***

Asher dove headlong into his pop culture assignments. Within a couple of days, he was singing along to a bunch of hits and spent hours binge-watching a number of series on any number of streaming services and broadcast channels.

A few days later, sitting around the breakfast table, Asher said, "There's some really nice music I've been listening to. Some make me happy and some make me want to cry but there's also a lot of crappy stuff, too. Why do people listen to songs with lots of bad words and songs that make fun of other people?"

"You know, Asher, that's a really good question," Dad responded. "I think that for some people, they think the bad words reflect the way people speak in real life and that making fun of other people or treating them disrespectfully is cool and that it somehow makes the singer seem more powerful. I don't agree but that kind of music is very popular now."

"I think that Ariana wanted to give you a range of music so that you could decide what you like and what you don't. Being able to compare different styles, even if you don't like some of them, gives you a way to measure one song against another, don't you think?" Mom asked.

"I guess so. Same thing with the movies and TV. I've seen some amazing stories, even some with gay kids and Jewish people but some of those shows where they stick people on desert islands and then they decide who they want to date, oh brother. And the ones with all of those rich housewives who wear lots of makeup and who are always getting into fights and screaming at each other? I'll be happy never to watch another episode. At least I know what the kids are talking about now."

"Did you text back to Maeve & Aiofe and Ariana to let them know what you've been up to?" I asked.

"Yup. Aoife couldn't believe I didn't like those housewives shows. She said all the gay guys love them. I guess I'm still the weird one."

"She's just being bitchy. Although I have to admit that some of the episodes are fun."

"Oh, God, Jaime. Are you serious?" Dad asked.

"Tyler loves the whole franchise. Eddie can't stand it. It's one of the few things they can't agree on," I said.

"I've been texting with Reggie every day. She's really nice. Just wants to make sure I'm doing OK. Even Bentley texted to say hi. He's growing on me. I didn't like him at first, but I think he's actually a pretty nice person. I've been texting with Ozzie, too. He said that us gay nerds have to stick together. I had to ask him what a nerd was."

"I think Ozzie's got a thing for you, my brother," I laughed.

Asher blushed.

"It's just nice to have people who want to be my friend again. I love your friends, Jaime, but I need some of my own, too."

"So, Dad, when are you gonna let us in on this year's holiday theme?" I asked.

"Well, I guess it's about time to spread the word. Christmas is just a few days away. This year is a pre-Columbus Christmas. I know. Makes no sense. There were no Christians in the Americas before Columbus. But everyone needs to use ingredients in their dishes that were present in the Americas before Columbus arrived."

"That's really cool, actually," I said. "Squash, peppers, tomatoes, beans, turkey, salmon, trout, sweet potatoes, potatoes, corn, and my favorite, chocolate! What about grasshoppers and guinea pigs?"

Asher's eyes went wide with terror. Mom and Dad just laughed. I'd eaten grasshoppers in Mexico and they're actually pretty tasty.

"You're just kidding, right, Jaime?" Asher asked, his voice trembling.

"Maybe, maybe not. Ever had grasshopper pie, Asher?" I laughed. I thought Asher was going to gag.

"Eating bacon was one thing, but I'm not gonna eat bugs!" Asher groaned.

Dad gave me some side eye, then turned to Asher "There aren't any grasshoppers in grasshopper pie, Asher, just mint and chocolate. It's just called grasshopper pie."

"I'm good then," Asher replied, notably relaxing. "Do I get to help?"

"Of course!" I replied. "No one gets away without contributing something.

"Hey, Dad, can we only use pre-Columbian ingredients?" I asked.

"No. You can supplement but I expect you to push yourself. Maybe a pumpkin pie sweetened with agave instead of sugar and with a cornmeal crust instead of wheat flour?"

"I love a challenge. You think Mama Bernice will make her sweet potato pie?"

"Actually, I was gonna ask her to do sweet potato biscuits and a savory corn pudding. You and Asher will have sole responsibility for desserts this year. Your Uncle Julio and Aunt Ximena are going to work with Abuela Zyanya to make traditional Oaxacan tamales. That leaves Mom, my dad, and Abuelo José in the kitchen with me to cook the other savory dishes."

"What about Alte Bubbe Esther?" Asher asked, anxious to see the woman he'd quickly become very attached to.

"I think we're going to give her a pass in the kitchen from now on. She's been looking kind of frail and it's too much work for her, but she'll be here. I know she loves talking to you, Asher."

"She's an amazing person. Her Yiddish isn't great, but she tries hard. I really appreciate it. So much love in that little body," Asher beamed.

"Jaime, is Darius going to help in the kitchen, too, or is he just going to show up for dinner?" Mom inquired.

"He's gonna come over on Christmas Eve. I didn't know what we'd be cooking but I figured we could always use an extra pair of hands to help prep the night before, so I already invited him," I responded.

"Mmm. You're such a bad liar, Jaime," Mom laughed. "The fact that Darius can help out in the kitchen is just a cover to get him over here early. I suspect you'll be putting his hands to a lot more uses than just peeling potatoes."

"Busted," I smirked.

"I think we'll order in dinner that night. It's way too much work to cook dinner on Christmas Eve then have to cook another massive meal the next day. What do you boys feel like?" Mom asked.

"What about Middle Eastern? Falafel, shawarma, baba ghanoush?" I asked. "I mean, it's kind of the food that Jesus ate, right?"

"Uh, that's a bit of a stretch," Mom said.

"How about Chinese food? Alte Bubbe says that's what Jews eat for Christmas"

All of us laughed.

"You nailed that one, Asher," Dad said. "On Christmas, when I was growing up, we'd either have Southern cooking or Chinese, depending on whether we were hanging out with my mom's family or my dad's. Chinese it is then."

***

Dad and I had spent the morning of Christmas Eve going through all of the recipes, checking to see what we already had in house and what I'd need to buy. Asher had spent the time downstairs binge-watching yet another show on Maeve & Aoife's list and Mom was checking on all of the plates, glasses, and utensils we were going to need.

At 2 PM on Christmas Eve, I swung by Darius's place to pick him up. We were headed to the supermarket armed with a long list of ingredients to pick up for the next day's dinner.

Rather than just sending a text to Darius that I was parked outside, I decided to head inside to say hello to Darius's family.

"Hey, stud. I'm ready," Darius said, a backpack slung over one shoulder and his winter coat at the ready.

"Can I come in for a second?" I asked.

"Sure. Everything OK?" Darius asked, looking concerned.

"Absolutely. I just wanted to say hi."

"I think Mom's in the kitchen. Dad's parked in front of the TV watching football and Ari's in her room."

"Send Ari a text to come down and let's round up your folks," I requested.

"You're scaring me," Darius said, eyeing me suspiciously.

Within two minutes, Darius's family was gathered in the living room, each having said hi and sitting down.

"God, everyone looks so serious," I said.

"I know that you don't celebrate Christmas. Honestly, we really don't either, at least not like in a religious way, but I just wanted to take a second to thank you for supporting Darius and me and making me feel like part of your family. I also especially wanted to thank you, Ari, for what you did for Asher. The kid is so happy. He's been walking around the house singing and can't wait to go to school in January. He was so scared and now he's not. And I've gotta say, you are fierce. The way you stood up to Bentley. Anyhow, the last few months have been the best of my life so far and I just wanted to tell the people who've helped make it that way."

"Bentley's OK," Ari began. "They're still finding themself. I think they thought it was cool that Asher asked them all those questions. Anyhow, Bentley's pretty connected at school and they'll watch out for Asher. And Jaime, Darius is really happy, too. Thanks for helping him come out."

"I can't imagine what would have happened if I'd decided not to cook Korean food back in October. Clueless Darius never would have gone to the supermarket searching for gochujang," Yasmin smirked.

"We're really pleased that Darius met you, Jaime. He's got a totally different energy now," Javid added. "And Happy Holidays to you and your family."

"That's the right expression," I laughed. "We celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa. Any excuse to get together as a family and eat."

First Yasmin, then Javid, and finally, Ariana leaned in and gave me a hug. As she leaned in, Ariana whispered, "Check your cell phone after you leave."

Darius and I hopped into my mom's car. I started the engine to get the heater going. I could see his face was wet. I leaned in and gave him a kiss.

"That was so cool what you just did. My family really does love you, you know," Darius smiled.

"My great grandma has always told me that you never know what day will be your last, so don't wait to thank people for their kindness and to tell people that you love them. She lost her whole family in the Holocaust. She said that she would give anything to be able to tell her mom, dad and sister how much she still loves and thinks about them. I can't even imagine that pain."

Darius pulled me into a hug and we held each other tight for what seemed like forever.

"I sure got what I was wishing for for Christmas," I said, with a big smile.

"'Dear Santa, I've been a very good boy this year. Please send me one furry, Persian, pre-law wrestler with a big pee-pee. Thanks, Jaime.' Was that it?" Darius quipped.

"Santa's got a data breach. That's it word for word," I smiled and leaned in for a kiss.

Before we pulled out of the driveway, I reached for my cell phone and checked for text messages. Just the one from Ari:

Bentley clued me in on your nickname. Now I really know why Darius is so happy. 🍆😆. Anyhow UR a great kid and Im glad UR my bros BF.

I burst out laughing and showed the text to Darius.

"I'm gonna kill her," he screamed, then burst out laughing himself.

End -- Tripod Ch. 37