J. H. P. Cash, 367

When I Were Nowt But a Lad 4

But it wasn't Iain who gave me my first experience of sex in the comfort and privacy of a bedsit. Mike, who had been a monitor in my Junior House when he was in the Lower Sixth, was now a monitor in my Big School house. Although I'd had a kind-of non-sexual crush on him the previous year, and had sucked him off once, we'd not done anything since I'd moved up to Big School. (OK, I had a "non-sexual crush" and had sucked him off? I mean that I had been very aware of liking and admiring him the previous year, and would be happy when he was on duty for the day, but it really wasn't a consciously sexual thing. I didn't wank off thinking about him or anything. Of course, I now realise that it was, in part at least, sexual, but at the time I would just have thought of it as regarding him as a smooth older boy. Even, I think, after I'd sucked him off.)

In my Big School House I still thought of Mike as one of the smoothest monitors, but neither of us had made any attempt to repeat the episode of the previous year. I suppose that I was probably more aware of him as an object of sexual interest, since I was by then actually starting to think of older boys more explicitly in those terms. But his bedsit wasn't in our dorm and opportunities never seemed to arise. At that time I don't think that I would have planned consciously to set out to "seduce" any other boy. I'd just be aware of some boys in a different way than I would be of others, and if circumstances arose... [I wonder if this is true? I think so. It was different later, but I think it's true for the time I'm now describing.]

ANYWAY... Mike was one of the older boys who paid court to Dab once he'd started getting over Steve. Sometime in the summer term, after the Drying Room encounter I described previously, Mike visited Dab after Lights Out and they had a quiet chat. Dab tended, even at 14, to get a bit giggly when excited by an older boy, so when Mike left the dorm I asked what he'd been giggling about. Mike had said that he'd be back to wake Dab up after the dorm was asleep, and take him back to his bedsit. I told Dab about sucking Mike off the year before and he asked if we'd done anything together since. I said no, but we agreed that Mike was really smooth.

The next morning Dab's bed was empty when I woke up at First Bell. He joined me at the washbasins in our dorm a few minutes later, grinning but also a little anxious. He told me later in our study that he'd had to leave Mike's bedsit in South Dorm just as all the boys there were waking up. No one had said anything, so he thought that he might not have been spotted (South Dorm was also separated by wooden partitions, so his exit would only have been visible briefly from either section). He also told me, "Mike still likes you." Apparently he had asked Mike about the sucking episode and Mike had confirmed the story. Dab had told Mike about what he and I had been up to.

"He might be interested in doing some more with you." Dab smiled.

"Wouldn't you mind?" I asked.

Charlie laughed and said, "He's got plenty of other Seniors after him; why would he mind?"

A few nights later Mike came into out dorm after returning from the Senior Club. This was a bar within the school at which Sixth Formers of 16 and above were allowed to drink (beer, in moderation, with parental agreement) - instituted quite recently because it was thought better to have older boys drinking on the campus rather than going into local pubs. The place was run by its members with a few masters supervising. I can't remember if there was a specific limit on how much you were allowed to drink, but there were severe penalties for drunken behaviour. Mike was relaxed but not pissed. He sat on the edge of my bed and said hello to Dab before turning to speak to me. I could smell the beer on his breath as he leaned over and spoke to me. He'd been smoking too. I realise that this will be difficult to understand today, but I found his breath very exciting. It made him seem even more manly and smooth. I wanted to kiss him right away. I didn't.

We agreed that Mike would come back later to wake me and I'd go to his bedsit. He told me not to wank before I went to sleep. That was difficult, but I managed it.

Mike woke me after midnight. He was now in his pyjamas. He told me quietly to wait a few minutes and then come to his bedsit. By the time I got there, Mike was back in his bed. I closed the door behind me and as I was about to approach the bed Mike told me to stay still. He switched on the little reading light over the head of his bed and told me to take off my pyjama top. When I did so, he smiled at me and then told me to take down my pyjama bottoms. I did, and Mike said "Excited already, eh?" when he saw my stiff dick. I tried to cover myself, but Mike told me to put my hands by my sides and come over to him. I stepped out of my crumpled bottoms. He was propped up on one elbow, his chest bare. He reached out with his other arm and placed his hand flat on my chest. His hand ran down and he grabbed my cock and balls quite tightly. I put my hands on his wrist but he told me to put them back by my sides. He pulled back my foreskin and I nearly reached to stop him again.

"What would you like to do?" Mike asked.

"Um, well... Whatever you like, I suppose" I replied.

"Anything? Really?"

I knew of nothing but the obvious basics. Rimming was the naughtiest thing I could imagine - or games with piss in the showers. I just shrugged and said, "Yeah, I think so." He was slightly scaring me. This wasn't quite the decent, cheerful, friendly monitor I knew.

He pulled back his bedclothes, turning onto his back. He was naked and his cock was hard. He pushed my flank and said, "Lick my balls." I moved down the bed a little, bent over and licked his balls while he ran a hand over my shoulders and down my back to my arse. Then he cupped the back of my head and told me to lick his dick. His hand stayed firmly but not aggressively on my head.

Mike said something about my having sucked him before and asked if I wanted to do it again. I just nodded and said "Yeah". He sat himself a bit higher against the bedsit wall at the head of his bed and told me to get up between his legs. I knelt between his legs and bent down again to suck his cock. He put his hand on the back of my head again, and held his cock up with the other hand, guiding it into my mouth. I was still a bit scared, I think. This all seemed a bit serious.

I sucked Mike for a little while, until he pulled me up and said, "I don't want to come yet."

He drew me up beside him and pulled the bedclothes back over us. Suddenly this became the much more cuddly, affectionate encounter that I had expected. Mike played with my cock and pulled me against him. When he kissed my neck I knew it was okay to kiss him back, and started kissing his neck and face. It had been exciting when he was being more demanding, but I was much more relaxed now, 'though still very aroused.

I don't remember very much more about that bit - only that it was my first proper experience of snogging and holding and stroking with a considerably older boy - a Big Boy. At one point Mike said that Dab had told him that Kemal had bum-fucked me and asked if I wanted him to bum me. I said yes, but Mike said that we'd leave it 'til another time. This time he just wanted me to suck him off. I was quite pleased by the idea that there would be "another time".

I set about sucking Mike's cock again and when he asked if he could come in my mouth I looked up at him and nodded. I remember this particularly as the first time that I swallowed a Big Boy's spunk. he wanked me off as we lay side-by-side kissing.

I don't remember now whether Mike and I had "another time" before I first had sex with Iain - I kind-of think we did, but again I didn't get fucked. Iain was the first Big Boy to fuck me, a little later that summer term.

I started writing my sexual memoirs at the request of an online undergraduate friend who had been to an all-boys private day school at which there was little sex between the boys. He was keen to hear about "what went on at boarding school".

Thanks to all those who have emailed to say that they are enjoying these memoirs.

Email: spelchek@hushmail.com