Date: Thu, 20 Dec 2018 20:13:35 -0500 From: James Heady Subject: With Love We Can Be Human--Chapter 15 With Love We Can Be Human By James Disclaimer This is a story which deals with sexual as well as romantic situations between teenaged males. There can sometimes be disturbing incidents of graphic abuse, violence and/or scenes of rape as well as dialogue concerning said subjects above-mentioned. Should you not be of the legal age to read such material, or should you be offended by such material then please find something else to read. Also remember to please donate to Nifty, as these donations from the public keeps these stories and related materials free to anyone in the public who wants to read them. Finally, I can be reached at jamesheady1985@gmail.com for those who wish to contact me regarding the story, or who have questions regarding it. With Love We Can Be Human Chapter 15 Brandon During Friday which closed that week of Torey staying with me after what happened the weekend before with Ethan, I went up to the center with Torey. Ryan was at Austin's house and Dana was having a sleep-over for the weekend with a few of her fellow female friends she was close with. Unless she, Austin and Ryan came up to see us, then it would just be Misho, Todor, Torey and I. Ethan continued to sleep in his medicated sleep and was improving, physically anyway, and things were starting to go back to normal, though there was still some sadness about what had happened. Once in Torey's room, I sat down after putting my bag beside the chair across from our bed. Torey sat down beside me after closing and locking the door. We kissed for a few minutes, then he turned so I could hold him in my arms from behind as I ran my hands up under his shirt to feel his silky stomach and gently rub and lightly pinch his nipples. That was the first time I explored that area with him and he was clearly enjoying it as he softly moaned, then moaned a little louder. I kissed the back of his neck, the backs of his ears and then had him turn his head so I could press my lips to his and deeply kiss him. We made out for a few more minutes, then just heled one another while we talked and enjoyed one another's company. I was happy more than words could say for being able to be with the love of my life and couldn't think of any other place I'd rather be at that point! 0000 Todor During that week, Misho had been moved back up to four counseling sessions a week rather than the two he had been decreased down to a couple of months before that. There were even a couple of nights he wanted to sleep by himself in his bed back in his own room. I was sad at knowing that he was going through the emotional hardships that were happening due to what he was facing for the first time in years, but also worried that he was afraid to share a bed with me. I was also worried that he was afraid that I'd try to push him in to things he didn't want to do. I was trying to think of how to talk with him about this as I sat there that Friday. He was in one of his counseling sessions that afternoon and I was writing in my journal while he was gone. We would talk during that week, but I could tell there was a wall up and it scared me and also made me feel sad for him. He was also quiet during that Friday morning as he got up to get a shower. He had slept in our room with me the night before and would let me hold him, but he was tense as we lay there and waited for sleep. Only in sleep did he relax in my arms, but sometimes I'd hear him yell out in his sleep. He had started sleeping back in our bed Wednesday night of that week and seemed to be having nightmares both nights. He'd wake up and I'd help him calm down. It worked, but he seemed to take longer falling back asleep and by that Friday morning, he looked exhausted. I hoped that Michael could reach him and that he would be able to take whatever advice and counseling he was giving him so he could get through this and be alright again. My thoughts were interrupted as I heard Misho call out on the other side of the door. I got up and opened it for him and he was standing there looking at me. He looked drained and also like he was trying to get over being back in that other place. I stepped aside and let him in to the room and then closed the door. He went over to the bed and sat down and motioned for me to do the same. I made sure my journal was locked away, then sat beside him and saw that he was holding something out to me. I looked at it questioningly. "It's for you," he said as he moved closer to me. I took the paper which was folded and I opened it and saw that it was a letter from him. Dearest Todor: I know it's been hard for you to see me going through what I'm trying to work through. I know it was hard for you when I told you I wanted to sleep by myself on Monday and Tuesday night. You gave me a look of understanding and a compassionate smile, but I saw and could sense the hurt, fear and sadness you were experiencing. I'm not and wasn't afraid of you, nor was I afraid that you'd try to take advantage of me being there with you, and I didn't fear that you would try to force me to do things I didn't want to do. I hope you know that. I needed some time to think and try to process everything that was and is happening with me. It's been hard going through all this. I'm scared and am just trying to take everything one day at a time, but it's more that I'm taking things one minute at a time and when that doesn't work, I'm functioning one second at a time. It's all I know to do. Your care and kindness towards me throughout the week as really helped more than you can know, I want you to know that. I don't know what's going to happen as the days go by, but I want to be by your side through it all and hope you'll be by my side through everything else that happens going forward. You're the best friend I could ever ask for and I feel connected with you more and more every day. When you kissed me the few times you did last weekend, that was more loving than anything I can say in words, as well as being the most sweetest thing you've ever done for me. It meant everything to me, everything! Your best friend and deepest love for always, Misho I put the letter down and wiped my eyes. His kind and loving words touched me deeply and meant more to me than anything. I wrote that to him after drying my eyes and he read what I said. "I'm glad you loved what I wrote to you," he said as he hugged me. "It was the best!" I replied with another note. He smiled and we hugged tightly for a long moment. After separating, I wrote another note, the note I wanted to write for all these months, then held it out for him to read. "I love you," it read. "I love you too Todor!" he cried as he cried tears of joy and threw his arms around me. We stayed like that as our tears fell, then even after they stopped and dried. I never wanted to let him go and I could feel that he felt the same way. 0000 Brandon That Friday night was closed with the most beautiful sunset I had ever seen. Torey and I sat out in the woods in a special place we found a while back. He was sitting in my lap leaned back against me as I held him wrapped loosely in my arms as we watched the sun go down for the evening. I felt peaceful and relaxed as we sat there and Torey was relaxed as well. "This has been a nice day," I said softly as I kissed the back of his neck. "It's definitely been nice," he agreed as he turned so he could kiss me gently on my lips. I returned the kiss, then we continued to watch the sun. We also talked softly about other things, and also about our love for one another, then after a while we just lapsed in to loving silence and just enjoyed one another's company. After the last couple of rays of sun were down, I turned Torey's head gently and pressed my lips to his. I kissed gently, then began moving my lips to work the kiss and he was kissing back just as deeply. We were soon lost in our kiss and we moved our hands under one another's shirts to feel one another's skin and it felt amazing! Our tongues were moving against one another frantically and my cock was a tight and iron-hard bar of throbbing metal between my legs and I felt like I could come any moment. Torey must have sensed this and I could tell he was close as well, because he broke the kiss and rested his head against my chest as we both worked at slowing our breathing as well as slowing down our rapidly beating harts! After calming down, I looked deeply in to Torey's eyes after taking his face gently in my hands. I smiled lovingly at him and he returned the smile. I kissed him tenderly on the lips, and he returned the kiss. "You're so beautiful!" I said as I hugged him tightly. "So are you!" he replied hugging me back just as tightly. I looked in to his eyes again as I rested my forehead against his. "As you probably noticed a moment ago, I was getting close to the edge, more than I had when we've made out like that before," I began. "I was wondering if we could go back to your room and'''." I was cut off as he placed an index finger gently against my lips then looked deeply in to my eyes for a moment. I saw love, need and desire all at once in his look and he must have seen the same in my own eyes. He then reached down and his hands went between my legs and gently pulled back the elastic of the shorts I was wearing. I felt my hart begin to beat hard and my body begin to shake with need, lust and desire for him. He lightly ran his fingers through my thick pubic hair, lightly brushed my inner thighs, then softly wrapped his hands around my hard flesh. I let out a long and loud moan of pleasure as he began lightly squeezing and relaxing his grip on my throbbing penis. He kept his right hand wrapped around my cock, then with his left hand took my balls in his palm, then rubbed them gently. He then began lightly squeezing and relaxing them in his hand which brought me closer. He noticed this, then let my cock and balls go. He removed his hands from out of my pants and wiped them on the grass. I repeated the same things to him he did to me and he was loving it, then after we stopped what we were doing, we kissed several times then just held one another close for a moment. He then looked deeply in to my eyes again and smiled. "Let's go to our room," he said softly. "I want to feel your warm and silky skin against mine, your lips against mine and our cocks against one another!" "So do I!" I said as we kissed hungrily for a moment! We then broke the kiss and after giving a moment for us to soften down there, we returned back to the house and after saying a quick goodnight to everyone, we went to his room to begin our loving activities for the evening. Once in his room, Torey locked the door and stepped in front of me as I stood by the bed watching him. He wrapped his arms around me and pressed his lips to the side of my neck which always made me tingle all over, as well as would make my balls throb and tingle. My cock would also jump several times and that seemed to make him happy when I would have those reactions. He kissed the other side of my neck then when I went to move so my lips would meet his, he stopped me and pressed his lips to my cheek giving me a long and moist kiss. He repeated this on my other cheek, then held me for a moment. "I figured we could ease in to things tonight," he whispered with his forehead resting against mine. I agreed and then I repeated the kisses on the same areas of his neck and face as he had done to me. He moaned and pressed his hardness against mine, then I helped him off with his shirt. I felt his upper body, really felt it; every inch of it. It felt like I was really feeling him for the first time and the feel of his warm and silky skin fed my love, lust and hunger for him! I took his right nipple between my thumb and finger, then rubbed it gently. He let out a loud moan of pleasure, then I pinched it lightly, then a little harder. I repeated this on his other nipple, then did it to them both at the same time. "That feels so good!" he said as he pressed against me harder. "I figured it would," I said as I moved my mouth to his chest. I lightly kissed the middle of his chest and all over it before moving to each of his nipples and kissing them over and over again. I stopped then took one of them between my lips and began massaging it with them, then rubbing it with my tongue which really drove him crazy! I did all this to his other nipple and he was really hot now. I could see the lump in his shorts jumping and I knew he was close! I stopped so he could calm down; actually I needed to calm down as well! My cock was jumping, throbbing and was so hard that it almost hurt! I stepped back and waited for a moment while we both calmed down. Once cooled off a bit, I stepped forward towards him again and he helped me off with my shirt and repeated everything with my nipples that I had just done with his. It felt amazing and I was quickly becoming addicted to the feel of a warm, wet mouth licking, kissing and sucking on my nipples! No wonder he was close to creaming his shorts as I stimulated his nipples a moment ago! It was fucking great! After a few minutes of him sucking and gently bighting down and releasing my nipples, he stopped and I helped him off with his shorts. We only had our shorts and boxers on, but those would be gone soon. He stood there as I took in the tent in his boxers and how the head of his cock was slightly peeking through the fly with precum leaking from the slit. It was a beautiful sight and I felt my mouth watering at the thought of tasting him! I reached out and pressed the palm of my hand to the cloth-covered cock and began rhythmically squeezing and relaxing my hand around his cock. He moaned loudly in pleasure and was breathing heavier than he had been before. I then reached in through the fly in his boxers and lightly brushed my fingertips against his balls which got him even hotter! "Fuck!" he growled through clenched teeth. "You're so fucking good at this!" "Thanks," I said smiling lovingly at him. After removing my hands from his cock and balls, I allowed him to help me off with my shorts and he did what I had done with him. It felt so good and I felt closer to coming than I had been within the last few minutes! After another moment of him rubbing my balls and squeezing and relaxing on my cock, he stopped and helped me off with my boxers. I helped him off with his and we stood before one another naked and ready to feel one another skin-to-skin and ready more than ever to let out our feelings and our cum on one another! Torey put his arms around me and I held him as well. We stood there like that for a long moment and I knew he was trying to calm down. I was doing the same and then he lifted his head from my chest and looked deeply in to my eyes. "Would you like to take a shower with me?" he asked then pressed his lips tenderly to mine. We kissed deeply for a moment, then I looked deeply in to his eyes. "I'd love that!" I said then kissed his cheek. "Did you want to come in the shower, or wait until we were back here in bed?" "Once we're done with our shower," he replied. "Sounds good," I said as I took his hand and lead him to the bathroom. Once finished with our shower, we returned to the bed. I had washed every part of his body, and he did the same for me. It felt great to feel all of him and to have him do the same to me! We sat down on the edge of the bed and I admired his naked body and loved the creamy color of his skin. His hair was beautiful as well as it shined in the lamp light. His hair at this point was a little shaggy and I loved that look on him. I reached out my hand and rubbed his back feeling the smooth texture of his skin. It made me want him even more. He reached out and did the same to me and he lightly slid the tips of his fingers up and down my back making me tingle all over. "Oooh!" I moaned. "That feels really good!" "I'm glad you like that," he said. I did the same to his back and he moaned, then moved closer to me. We wrapped our arms around one another and my lips found his and we began kissing hungrily! His lips tasted great and when his tongue began rubbing against mine, I felt my balls throb and tingle as well as my cock jump several times. After we made out for a few moments, I laid down full-length on the bed and Torey did the same. We lay on our sides touching one another, feeling one another's bodies and enjoying our time together. Torey then rested his head on my chest for a few minutes and I just held him as he calmed down. After a few more minutes of silence, he lifted his head and kissed me softly on my lips, then motioned for me to turn so that I was lying on my back. "Since we're already really fired up," he began. "We should probably jack off so we can last for a while. I plan on us going for a long time tonight." I smiled and turned over on my back. "Don't like the idea of coming too soon?" I said smiling at him as he moved closer and looked deep in to my eyes. "We could come quickly sometime," he said. "But I want us to make love for as long as we can tonight. That's what we're doing, making love for the first time, and I want it to really last!" He kissed me deeply and held the kiss for a long moment, then let me go. "That's exactly what we're doing," I said softly as I held him close. "We're making love and tonight's our first time. It feels real, but also feels like it's almost a dream too. You get what I'm saying?" "Yeah, I really do," he said then stroked my hair lovingly. We kissed again, then he had me move so that he could get on my left side. "What were you wanting to do?" I asked once he was lying beside me on my left this time. "I stroke my cock with my left hand so I wanted to do that to you with the same hand," he answered. "I'd love that!" I said. "I jack off with my left hand as well, so this will work out good!" He kissed me, then wrapped his hand around my cock. He felt up and down its length, rubbed the palm of his hand on my balls, then moved his fingers behind my balls and lightly brushed the area behind my sack which felt amazing! It felt even better with him doing it and I had done most of this stuff to myself when jacking off. After he stimulated that area, he began stroking my cock up and down slowly. It felt amazing and I felt waves of pleasure flowing over me! My hips began to move as he began picking up speed. My cock began feeling more and more good, and as I produced more precum, the moist sounds got louder which excited Torey more than he had been! "I love that sound!!" he said smiling hugely. "Me too!" I said hardly able to get the words out. He got faster and then he did the thing that would bring me over the edge faster than anything else! He took my left nipple in his mouth and began massaging it with his lips, rubbing it with his tongue then lightly grazing it with his teeth! This got me closer and then he began nipping it several times with his teeth! He wasn't doing it hard, but doing it enough so that I could tell he was using his teeth! It didn't hurt at all, but got me even more hot! "Oh fuck!" I yelled. "I'm close! I'm so fucking close!" He stopped his oral stimulations on my nipples, then moved his mouth to my ear. "Yeah Brandon!" he said softly. "You're getting closer now!" "Oooooh!" I moaned loudly. "I feel like I'm gonna bust!" "Yeah babe!" he said in a lustful whisper. "Let yourself go!" "Ooooooohhhh!" I moaned again as my orgasm began deep inside. "That's it lover!" he said. "Let yourself go and just let it happen!" He began sucking and nibbling on the top of my ear and that combined with his stroking sent me over the edge! "Oh fucking yeah!" I yelled as I began coming! I felt my cock shoot off blast after blast of thick hot cream! My body was thrashing all over on the bed and my hips lifted up in the air as I let my orgasm over take me! It felt more amazing than I could say in words and I never thought it could be as good as it was! After I got out the last drops of cream, I relaxed my body and focused on slowing my breathing. I never felt anything like that before! Even jacking off didn't feel that good! It was good to be sure, but this was better! Torey was rubbing his hand through the cum that was soaking my stomach and when I opened my eyes to watch him, he was licking some of it off his fingers. "How is it?" I asked. "It's great!" he said as he moved his mouth to my stomach. I figured he was going to taste more of it and I was pleasantly surprised when he began licking and sucking more of it up! He was cleaning me off in the best way imaginable! He licked all of it up, then began licking it off my cock which felt even better! He then licked up a large amount which had collected in the area between where my sack and thigh met and then he used his boxers to soak up a little which had got in my pubic hair, then I was clean. He lay back and I began jacking him off. He loved it and I was enjoying the moist sounds as my hand slid up and down the length of his cock rubbing the precum all over. I continued this and began doing the same to his nipples as he had done to mine. In short, I did to him everything he had done to me. He was thrashing hard all over the bed as I loved him with my hands and mouth, and he was yelling for more and how good it felt! It was making me hard again knowing the effect I was having on him! He was getting closer and I repeated on his ear what he had done with mine, then he yelled that he was coming, then threw his hips up in the air as he came hard! Thick streams of cum shot out of his cock like fireworks and landed all over his stomach, chest and all over my hand! It was a wonderful sight! I cleaned him off like he had done with me and his come was thick, slightly salty and tasted great in my mouth! After he was all clean, we lay there kissing, touching one another gently and hugging tightly. I felt even closer to him in that moment than ever before and he told me once we were under the covers and calming down from the hours of love-making we did, that he felt the same way! Once we lay there for a bit after our mutual jacking off, we began kissing tenderly, then long, tender kisses turned to deep hungry ones. I then moved Torey so that he was on his back and I began kissing all over his face, his neck then moving down to his chest where I kissed all over his chest, then I stimulated his nipples for a long moment, then stopped after a while so he could get his breath back! "You love using your mouth on my nipples don't you!" he said smiling hugely at me as I held him while he calmed down. "I do," I replied. "I love how it gets you almost to the edge and how it gets you even more hot." "I love what it does to you when I do it back to you as well," he answered. I then moved to his stomach where I kissed all over it, then I kissed up and down each of his sides which really drove him crazy! He was moaning loudly and I went back to kissing his stomach all over, and he was thrashing wildly on the bed and I kept it up until he had to have me stop since it was getting to be more sensitive for him. After a few minutes, he turned on his stomach and motioned for me to move behind him. "Do you want me to do your back and shoulders?" I asked as I moved behind him. "Yeah," he said smiling back at me. I planted kiss after kiss all over his shoulders and back and then bathed everywhere I kissed with my tongue which made him even more hot! He tasted good and I then moved my tongue down to his cheeks and began tongue-bathing the smooth skin. He moaned loudly, then I reached up and gently spread his cheeks apart. "Oh wow! Are you'''?" he began, but was cut off as I moved my face between his cheeks to gently graze his rosebud with my tongue. "Oh my god! Yeah! That feels so fucking great!" I hadn't ever really thought of that part of guy-on-guy sex in the couple of years before Torey and I got together, but at that moment, I felt a strong desire to explore him there with my mouth. I kept moving my tongue all around his rosebud, then began sliding my tongue up and down his crack getting him nice and wet down there. He was moaning and twisting from side-to-side as I continued loving his ass with my mouth. Finally after a few more moments of that, I moved him on his back again and moved so that I was resting on top of him, but making sure that my full weight wasn't on him. I rested some of my weight on my elbows as I situated my cock against his. His bent up towards his stomach and so did mine which made for easy maneuvering! I wrapped my arms around him and he wrapped both his arms and legs tightly around me as I began to grind my cock against his. He was thrusting against me hard and it felt great, his penis sliding up against mine! It also felt amazing when our cocks pressed against one another as we thrust against each other again and again, bringing one another closer and closer! I could also feel our stomachs get more and more slick as our precum flowed freely and more and more heavily as we got closer to our second climax! After a couple more thrusts, Torey broke the kiss we were holding and pressed hard against me and let out a loud yell as he came between us with his seed flowing between our hot bodies! Mine joined his seconds later and still we thrust against one another, unable to stop! Torey rolled so that I was on my back now and he was thrusting against me and after a few minutes, we came again! I never felt so good than in that moment on that night! Under the covers after a slower, but yet more powerful bonus climax, we shared warm and soft kisses while holding one another tightly at first, then we relaxed and just lay there looking deeply in to one another's eyes. "I love you Torey," I said then kissed him tenderly. "I wanted to say that to you for a long time." "I love you too Brandon," he replied and kissed me back. "I've wanted to hear that from you for a while as well as say it to you." "You're the best," I went on. "You're a good friend as well as an amazing lover and boyfriend!" "You're all of those," he replied back. We kissed again, then lay there looking deeply in to one another's eyes. Soon though, I felt Torey relax a little more and he rested his head in the hollow of my neck and he was asleep quickly. I was right behind him in sleep seconds later. It was the best night of my life! 0000 Stoyan Denev It was Friday night and my parents were out. I was reading on the front porch of our home and that was helping me a little. The night sounds were also helping to relax me. The crickets were peaceful and the breezes relaxed me a little more. My family came here to the United States two years before I was born from Bulgaria, and my father Risto was a doctor at Sangger University Hospital and my mom Elisaveta worked as a nurse at the same hospital. They both enjoyed their jobs and it allowed for us to live a comfortable life. I should say though that this "Comfortable Life" is comfortable only in terms of whatever material possessions one can buy. A life made comfortable by good friends and knowing that you're loved and valued by kids and adults other than your family is a different story though. I was born blind from Glaucoma that they found when I was a few months old and while I had some vision in the beginning for the first few months, the Glaucoma I have destroyed my vision quickly. It's an eye condition in which fluid in the front of the eyeball can't properly drain out of the drainage passages and it continues to build up in the eye causing eventual damage to the optic nerve and eyeball and eventually can cause partial or total vision loss. Total blindness was to be my fate, this didn't bother me growing up. I had a few friends, a boy and a few girls I'd hang with when I was in elementary school. To them, my blindness wasn't a big deal. They were with me from eight years old up until the end of this past year before I turned 14. I always figured that I liked boys when I was between eight and nine years old. Thinking about them without their shirts made me feel excited emotionally and I'd feel weird feelings down there when this would happen sometimes. I didn't think too much of it, but when I was 12 and started going through puberty, I knew that I was gay. I didn't think my friends would accept me in the beginning since they were a little more religious than was my family and I. We're religious and believe in God, but my former friends had an idea of God that was more the Pat Robertson sort of God who hates gays and thinks that doctors who perform abortions should be at best sent to prison, and at worst killed. So I didn't tell them about my feelings for a while. I kept quiet until shortly before the end of this past year. I started seeing other kids come out at Sangger High so I figured that my friends might begin to be more open-minded about it. They would be friendly to other kids who were openly gay or so it seemed. So on a cold day in November, in the middle of the month, I sat them all down at my house when my parents wouldn't be home. That was risky on my part as I think about it, because there could have been the chance that any of them could have gotten violent with me should they have freaked out even more. They didn't freak out at all when I told them. What there was instead, was a long silence. One of the girls spoke up. She was one who didn't mind sharing her beliefs more vocally than the others. "Okay Stoyan," Danielle said. "I can deal with you and the blind thing, but this. You know what the Bible says about men having sex with one another. I talked about this a few months ago at lunch. A couple of my other friends were at the table with us and you heard it all." "I know today they say it's normal," Dianne the second girl added. "But maybe you're just confused. It's not like you've ever had a girlfriend before." "I know who I am," I said beginning to feel my face burn and I began to feel like I could cry. "You never talked much about girls when we brought it up before," the third girl Lisa added. "I guess it makes sense now. So you said you knew when you were 12. Don't you think it was a little selfish of you to not tell us?" "I was worried about how you might act," I began. "I was worried that you might act this way and sure enough, you are." "So now it's our fault," she shot back. "You need to stop blaming others for what you're doing. You lied to us." "I didn't lie about anything," I said beginning to get angry. The only guy Tanner in our group finally spoke. "I guess it makes sense why you always tried to dress quickly in the locker rooms after swimming," he began. "You didn't want us seeing how awake you would get thinking about us. I'm sure it was frustrating not being able to look at our naked bodies and perv on us like that." "I want you to know," Danielle said speaking sharply. "I won't support this! You can either change this and become straight, keep quiet about it or I'm done with you!" "I can't help who I am," I said close to tears now. "So you're a victim now," Tanner said. "It's like my dad said, everyone's a fucking victim these days. You know what Stoyan, I'm not supporting this bullshit! These girls here are talking about you getting treated or cured for your fucked up attractions, whatever the hell that means. I'm like my dad, knock the fucking shit out of dick-sucking fags like you. Sorry Stoyan, but I won't have you at my house for the weekend like we usually would having to worry about whether or not you're going to come in my room and try to give it to me up the ass you sick fag! I'm out of here!" He slammed the door as he left and I didn't think he'd wait for them as they all walked here since my house is close to the school. I waited for a moment after the door slammed and the girls got up as well. "Since you didn't say anything," Danielle began. "I guess we have our answer. You're not going to be normal?" "Get out!" I yelled as I jumped up from the table so hard that my chair fell back and crashed to the floor. "I guess normal to you is cutting it off with a friend you've known for a long time just because they're a little different than you!" "Don't yell at us," Dianne said. "You knew our religious beliefs long before this, so don't play the victim with us." "I just thought you could look past that with me," I said beginning to lose the battle with not crying. "God's laws aren't negotiable," Lisa said. "You can look past my blindness, but not me being gay," I said as my hands tightened in to fists as I tried to hold back my tears. "Those are two different things," Danielle said. "Nice try fag." Then they were walking out of the house and seemingly out of my life. I set my chair right and almost fell on it as the strength left me. I lost control and began sobbing hard! Later that night when I said I wasn't hungry when my dad came in to let me know dinner was ready, I hoped he'd go and eat with mom. I was on my bed with my face in my arms after having broken down again while they were getting dinner ready. My dad didn't go back in to the kitchen though, but came over and sat down on the edge of my bed and touched the back of my head rubbing my hair softly. "Are you sick?" he asked. "I'm just tired," I said looking away from him. "You look like you've been crying," he said as he laid down and held me. "I'm fine," I said trying to not cry again. "Did something happen at school?" he asked. "No, just something I'm going through right now," I said looking away again. "I'll be fine, but I guess I could tell you later." "Okay, but I can let you rest if you want," he said kissing me on the forehead. "I'll come down to dinner in a moment," I said. He held me for a moment, then left the room. I went in the restroom that was in my room, one of the reasons I picked this room when we moved in to this house a few years ago. I washed my face and tried to get my thoughts together. Somehow I got through dinner and spoke a little so that my parents wouldn't be completely freaked out. After dinner, I went back to my room and fell asleep for the rest of the night only waking up long enough when my mom woke me up to get changed in to my sleeping clothes later that night. I fell back asleep after that and didn't wake up until the next morning when my parents were gone having left to go to breakfast which is something they did every other Saturday to have some alone time to talk and enjoy one another's company. All through that morning, I did my chores, but also worried about my parents finding out that I was gay and I also worried about my former friends telling them, and doing it in ways that could cause problems between the three of us. By the time they got home, I had finished cleaning my room and felt almost nauseated when they got home. We said hi to each other, then after they settled in, I asked if I could talk to them for a few minutes. They agreed and we sat on the couch as we did when having family meetings. "Are you doing a little better?" my dad asked. "I know you seemed upset last night." "I was worried when you wanted to skip dinner before coming down for it," my mom said. "I know that you wouldn't miss having your favorite meal and so I wasn't sure what to think." "I had a lot on my mind," I said feeling like I could start crying again. "You can tell us whatever it is," my dad said putting his arm around me. "You don't have to be afraid to tell us whatever it is you want to say," my mom added taking my hand in hers. "Is it something that's happened recently," my dad asked. "Yeah," I said as I felt tears filling my eyes and my lips started trembling badly. "Stoyan," my mom said voice filled with concern and worry. "What happened? It'll be alright, just tell us what it is." "I lost my friends!" I yelled out as I began crying again. "They're gone and they're never coming back!" They held me as I sobbed about as hard as I did the night before after my friends left the house. "You lost your friends?" my dad asked as they held me between them. "Did you guys have a fight? Maybe they just need a few days to calm down or maybe you all do?" "No!" I said sobbing harder. "They don't want me back!" They held me as I cried hard enough so that I couldn't speak for a few minutes. I knew they were worried for me and I hoped that I could calm down enough to tell them everything that had happened to cause my friends to leave in the first place. Eventually I did calm down. "You said they don't want you back?" my mom said. "What happened exactly?" "I told them Yesterday that I'm gay," I began. "Please don't hate me!" I began crying again and they held me a little tighter this time as I worked through my emotions. They slowed then stopped and I was held between my parents as I tried to gather my thoughts. "So you are gay?" my dad asked, but there was kindness in his voice. "Yeah," I said. "We had wondered between the two of us," my mom said as she hugged me and kissed the top of my head. "What made you wonder?" I asked. "I think part of it was just how you never seemed to show much interest in girls," my dad said. "You didn't say much about girls you might have liked, but then also didn't really seem interested when I'd ask about if you started liking girls yet. I know I've asked you that a few times, especially within the last few months as your body has started changing. I can figure now that that probably made you feel uncomfortable." "It's okay," I said. "I just wasn't sure how to tell you." "I think somewhere deep in my mind I guessed that you were gay," my mom said hugging me again. "You being gay doesn't change anything about how I feel about you." "I want you to be happy," my dad added. "Since you're gay, I want to know that you'll be alright with who you are, but I also want to know that you'll be treated well by whoever you pick as a boyfriend whenever you decide to start dating. "Thank you," I said hugging them both. "I would like to know what happened between you and your friends though," my mom said and she was using her tone she did when she wanted to be supportive, but still wanted me to tell her what was really going on. I knew it well. I told them everything, and I didn't leave anything out. When I got to the last part of it when the guy in our group called me a fag, my dad sat up and I could feel his energy change. I knew rage was flowing through him. "I knew that boy's father was a hateful Bastard, who knows what other kinds of Bullshit he's been filling his head with!" he said punching his fist in to his open hand. "Risto!" my mom said. She didn't shout or yell his name, but I knew she wanted him to calm down. "I'm not going to hunt that boy or those girls down," he said. "I'm not going to go after their parents either, but I'll at least let them all know that unless they're prepared to apologize to you, then they're not welcome here again." "Could we just let it go for a few days?" I asked. "How they treated me was bad I know, but it's only been since last night. Maybe they need time to calm down." My dad was silent for a long moment. "Okay," he said. "If you see them at school on Monday and they begin treating you well again, then I'll let it go, though they'll be apologizing to you as well as to your mom and I." "Thank you," I said relieved. We all three hugged again and I went off to my room to lay down for a bit. 0000 The memories faded as I sat there on the steps. Danielle, Dianne, Lisa and Tanner hadn't gotten back in contact with me for the past six months after having cut it off with me so I was alone in school save for when interacting with classmates with whom I'd do work as well as with teachers. Aside from that though, the days in school at that point were lonely and books were the only thing that were keeping me going, well that and my faith. It was still lonely and I missed having a friend or friends to share things with and wondered if I'd have close friendships again. This also kept me some nights from sleeping. I was growing more and more tired and it was harder to get up in the morning, I don't mean actually waking up, but finding the strength to physically get up and start my day. I hadn't told my parents about this yet. There were a couple of days where recently I was starting to feel a little better, but Yesterday was one of those days of feeling depressed as Hell and I didn't get out of bed until 11:00 A.M. long after my parents had been gone for work. I was hoping things would get better soon, but I felt like I could lose the strength to go on more and more as the days would go by. 0000 The nurses and doctors checked on Ethan that Friday night when all of the center was asleep and long after Brandon and Torey fell asleep. Dr. Martin the Neurologist ran his tests and a couple of the other doctors ran their tests, then they all talked in one of the consultation rooms. They were disturbed to see that though Ethan's coma was drug-induced, it seemed that most of his body was in a deeper coma than even the drugs would put him under. They all questioned, but none wanted to say what was clear in a less scientific way. Ethan must be giving up. They all knew what had been done to him and a couple of the doctors knew more about what had happened to lead to him being sent to the center in the first place and it was no surprise to them that he was most likely losing the will to fight and come back to everyone. They finished their reports and conference, then went home for the night all of them wondering about Ethan's fate. 0000 Brandon Saturday was warm and sunny as Torey, Todor, Misho and I ran on the track in back of the center. We had been doing it for a little under an hour at that point, and I was feeling my muscles in my legs burning. It was fun and I felt free as I ran. Everyone else seemed to be enjoying themselves as well, and we agreed to keep it up for possibly another hour. As I past everyone as I ran back to the starter's line again, I saw Misho slowing. "Sure you can keep up?" I called to him smirking at him as I said it. He flipped me off and smirked back as we both got to the starter's line again. "The loser has to buy something for us all depending on who finishes last," he said as he opened his water bottle and drank from it. "Oh, that's how it is, is it?" I asked. "Yeah, that's how it is," he said giving me the biggest smart-ass look he could come up with. "What did you have in mind?" I asked. "ice cream always works," he said. "So what you're really saying is that you want some ice cream after this since your sad little body can't take the heat," I said with mock sadness. "I was going to say that the one who finishes last can get a consolation prize for themselves," he began. "But if you're going to be like that then, then you have to sit and watch us enjoy." "You're so kind and giving," I said laughing. "I know I am," he said. Todor and Torey were coming up to where we were standing and Todor held out a note in my direction. "He's that desperate for ice cream?" it read. "Really? I know he's addicted to sweets, but damn." "Not as addicted as I am to real "Sweets"," Misho said looking at Todor and licking his lips suggestively while trying to keep his smirk going. "Okay, so when you're not obsessed over ice cream, then it's sex," I shot back. "What else is there in life?" he said laughing. We ran with his challenge in mind and I ended up slowing while the rest hit the finish line. I caught up to them a couple of seconds after so it was clear who was going to be the ice cream man for the day. "Lucky you Brandon," Todor's note read as he held it up smirking at me. "I thought you're supposed to be the nice one of the two of you," I said faking hurt feelings. "I'd expect this from Misho, not you." "Surprise. Bitch!" his second note read and above it he had drawn a smiley face with the smile being more of a smart-ass smirk. "Okay, I'll buy you your ice cream once we get cleaned up," I said laughing. We got cleaned up and went out to an ice cream store that was a couple of blocks from the house. Once there, we went in and I got everyone's orders then we sat down after I paid the guy behind the counter. Everyone thanked me and even Misho thanked me without his sarcasm. It was good as well, I hadn't ever been there and was really enjoying my first time there. "I'm amazed at all the flavors they have here, I said. They all agreed and I took another bight. I had a bowl of Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough and it was one of my favorite flavors of ice cream, but it was even better at the place we were at. Then Misho was back up to his tricks. He was sitting to my left and Todor was to his left. Torey was on my right engrossed in a bowl of Chocolate ice cream with big chunks of chocolate chips throughout it. I felt Misho's hand as it was above my head, and I moved my hand up and he had his right thumb on the top of my head while he had his spoon in his left hand. "I told you I'm not under your thumb," I said moving my head down, but his thumb was still there. "Things have changed today," he said smiling at me. "Oh, I see how it is," I answered him. "I agreed to buy you ice cream if I lost our race and this is how you act." I was laughing while trying to keep a reproachful tone in my voice. Todor reached up and moved Misho's hand off my head and I could see the smile he had as he did it. "Thank you Todor," I said. He gave a thumbs up which was his way of saying "You're welcome." Rather than having to take time to write it out. "I'm not sure what we're going to do with you Misho," Torey said after swallowing some of is ice cream. "I'm beyond your guys' help," Misho said laughing. "Of course you are," I said hitting him playfully on the shoulder. We finished up, then went back to the center. I was glad to see that Misho was starting to be back to himself and he definitely seemed to be doing better that day. Once back at the center, Michael was there to greet us. He asked us to come in to the office with him and once there, he told us about how Ethan's coma deepened in spite of the drugs. He said that the doctors thought that he was giving up and so they suggested that his friends should start coming to visit him now. They were desperate to try anything at this point. "So would you guys be able to visit him and just talk to him," Michael said. "Maybe he can't hear you, but maybe he can." We all agreed and went to the clinic to sit with Ethan for a while. Ethan lay among the hospital equipment. It seemed that you couldn't see him that well, that's how small he was. He was connected to tubes and various monitors, and a breathing tube was in his mouth and down his throat breathing for him. He looked even younger than 13 and I stood there looking down at him and felt like crying. "Hi Ethan," I said as I tried to hold back my tears. "I'm here and a few of my friends are here to visit you. The doctors said that we could come and visit you since they've done all of the testing and other things they needed to do. They just wanted a little time to go by before you started getting visitors. We're here for you and you'll always be safe with us." Torey and Misho said hi to him, then Misho read Todor's note to him as well. We sat there for almost an hour telling him about our day and about anything else we could think of, then one of the doctors came in and said they needed to examine him. Everyone else cleared out of the room, but I stood there looking down at Ethan. The doctor had let me take a moment to say goodbye to him before leaving the room. "You're one of the best friends I have," I said softly leaning close to Ethan's ear and taking his hand in mine. "You're one of the best, and you shouldn't be here. You didn't deserve what happened to you and my friends and I all love you. We'll always be by your side and will always do everything we can to protect you. I love you." I kissed him on the cheek and then walked out as the doctor went in to do what he needed to do. Author's Notes I figured that this would be a good place to stop. Though this last scene was rather sad, I wanted there to be some happiness among the boys after the scenes with Stoyan who's going to play a big part in one of the story lines going forward. This will be the last chapter before the holidays start up. Once I get back from being out of town the week after next, we'll continue with the next chapter. So everyone have a really happy holiday and I'll see everyone in Chapter 16.