Young Volcanoes
~ by Billy Wright ~



Any and all thoughs are welcome:
billy.alexander.wright@gmail.com


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Chapter 13
Fuck Up part 1 (The Taco Place)


"So, this is it," you say, lying on the couch of your living room, your legs spread out with a cup of coffee between your hands.

"This is it," I repeat, taking a sip of my mug. "The end."

"The moment when you fuck everything up," I know you are saying that just to tease me but I must admit that the memory of it still pains me a little. "The moment that causes Armando to leave you, your sunflower boy."

"The end," I look through the window. The sunrise isn't far away.


***



A few months had passed since the day Armando had arrived on my doorstep with the sunflowers and dressed as a skeleton. We then had our perfect date -the second first date- and now we were not only used to having the other around and very much officially dating the other, it was a few days before Christmas when I took the next big step with him.

Armando and I were shopping at the mall, looking for Christmas presents. One of them for my mother, it was pretty last minute but I hadn't found time to buy hers. So, that day I called Armando and off we went. Then, when we finished, suddenly, while waiting in line, I recognized someone.

"Hold this," I gave Armando the presents we were about to buy. He just watched me, confused as I walked to the other side of the line where a boy was checking something in one of the aisles. I didn't know what to say, so I just went to the point. "Hey," I started.

The boy took a while to realize I was talking to him. "Hey?"

"Oh, sorry for interrupting you like this, it's just that..." I took a step back, looking away. "I just wanted to apologize. I... I don't know if you remember me but a few months ago, right before Halloween, I saw you and my friend, Morgan eating at the Taco place in the mall. I... well, I waved at him but right then you stood up and left."

The boy looked at me, "oh, yeah, I remember that day." He still looked confused.

"Well, I just wanted to say... sorry for interrupting your date with Morgan like that. He is only a friend, but still, sorry."

The boy started blinking, more confused than ever. "My date with Morgan?" He almost laughed. "Dude, I wasn't on a date with Morgan, he is my cousin. Besides, I'm straight. We were just hanging out."

"What?" Now it was my turn to look confused. "But then, why did you leave when I waved at you?"

"Oh, I was already leaving," the boy explained. "I was in a bit of a hurry, my father had just called me and you just happened to arrive as I was standing up."


***



"What?" You stare at me. "That's real? He was Morgan's cousin? Not his date?"

"Precisely," I reply.

"So... Morgan lied to you that day?"

"He did," I nod. "But it is a little more complicated than that. "I'll explain later."


***



I awkwardly returned to the line with Armando who gave me a curious look. I explained everything to him as we moved through the line, paid the Christmas presents, grabbed a cart and went to the parking lot. Armando found my story quite funny.

"So you just assume that every two guys sitting together are on a date?"

"I didn't assume that!" I defended myself. "Captain told me that was a date."

Armando gave me a suspicious look before shrugging it off. "And there I was this morning thinking going Christmas shopping would be terribly boring."

I opened my mouth. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Armando turned around and wrapped his arms around me. "It means that even the most boring, eye-turning, gut-wrenching activity, such as Christmas shopping, can actually be interesting when I'm with you."

I couldn't help but smile. He knew how to get into my heart. I shut him up with a kiss. In the young night, right in the middle of the parking lot, both wrapped up in winter wear. Life was perfect when I was with Armando.

"Johnny? Is that... oh!"

Armando and I quickly stepped away from each other when we heard that voice behind us. I looked around, confused. It took me a moment to spot my mother, walking towards us through the parking lot with her own cart in front of her.

When my eyes met hers, I almost felt like drowning. Yes, she knew I was into guys, or at least I assumed she knew, she was there when Armando gave me those sunflowers, and she saw me hang out with him after that but... I hadn't told her I had a boyfriend yet. Now, there she was, and she fucking saw us kissing. I tried to come up with an excuse, of a way to deflect, of...

"Good evening, m'am," Armando greeted her.

"Hey there, Armando," my mom replied, cautiously looking at him, then at me, then at him again. "Nice to see you."

"Nice to see you too," Armando replied, not an ounce of doubt in him. "We were doing some last-minute Christmas shopping but I don't recommend you get too close or else you are going to get a spoiler on what John bought you this year."

"Is that true?" My mother smiled, looking at me. "Did you just buy my Christmas gift today?"

"Well, it is a little bit last-minute," Armando replied. "But I promise you, you are going to love his present," then, leaning forward a little, he whispered. "I helped him choose it. Besides, perfection takes time."

"It does," my mother replied, smiling. "Actually, Armando, wanna know a secret?" Armando leaned forward again, and so did my mother. "I just bought his gift today too!"

And both of them started laughing. I was speechless, what had just happened? For a second it seemed that my mother had just found out we were kissing -when she didn't even know we were something- and now, Armando and my mom were just laughing as if it was nothing. Maybe I worried about nothing.

"Would you like to join us for dinner?" My mom asked then.

"I would be honored," Armando replied, gracefully. Then, the three of us kept walking through the parking lot.


***



"I was really surprised that my mom and Armando hit it off so easily, they genuinely liked each other, even when I wasn't around, they joked around and talked. Like, really talked."

"Well, I don't know Armando but your mother has always been someone special," you reply, as if you could perfectly picture the scene. "But it does seem like you didn't see it coming."

"Who could see that coming?" I complained. "But a lot of things changed suddenly around that time. I started dating Armando, you had your big fight with Mom, I turned 16 and got the blue car as a gift... it was sudden, so sudden."

It was true, everytime I look back at that time I remember the warm, cozy times I was in but also the confusion, the excitement, the rush of feeling the world spinning around me faster than ever before.

"Anyway, a few weeks later, when January came around...."


***



That day, I was at home with Armando sitting next to me. He was finishing some homework while I was searching for a band we had both fallen in love after seeing them live as a part of our last date. We still loved having big dates but now, with things more serious between us, we also learned to enjoy the quiet moments with each other.

"Dear, John," I suddenly heard Armando's voice, calling me. I looked up from the computer and right at him, smiling. I always seemed to smile when I looked at him.

"Yes?"

"I went to the mall the other day," he said, intriguing, mysterious. "I saw Morgan. He was at the Taco Place in front of the Japanese restaurant Buch works at."

"You talked to him?" I wasn't sure where he was going with that.

"I did, yes," Armando hadn't stopped taking notes in his notebook. "Nothing important but when we talked he was rather surprised to see me. Too surprised, I'd say."

I tilted my head. "Too surprised?"

Finally, Armando lifted his head from the notebook and looked straight at me. He had a sly smile on his lips. "You haven't told him or Buch about us, have you?"

I opened my mouth but stumbled through the words in my mind so I just shrugged innocently.

"Actually," Armando kept going on, "the other day your mom mentioned that you don't hang out with them as you used to before."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"If you are naturally drifting apart, then no. That happens, it's life," Armando closed his notebook. "But if you are... I don't know, avoiding them or something, just because you're dating me... then yes, dear John, it's bad. I don't want to break up a friendship with your friends."

I made an innocent face but Armando didn't soften his look, he was being serious.

"Okay, yeah, I may have been keeping them on pause. I just... I don't know, I just wanted to enjoy this thing we have for a little while, besides things got very weird with them last year. You know, the whole they-paid-you-to-date-me thing and finding out that you and Captain used to date, so... no, I haven't told them about us."

Armando stayed quiet for a second. He looked away and closed his notebook. For some reason, that only made me more nervous. I didn't know what to expect but when Armando opened his mouth what came out was: "I understand." I was a bit surprised by that. "It's natural, after all that happened with them paying me. I think it's only natural. But you forgave them, right?"

"Yes," I replied.

"Well, then let the past be the past," Armando made a cute grin. "And, it's cool that you wanted to enjoy me for yourself a little while but we started dating in November. We've been dating for... what? Two months now, right? Almost three. Maybe it's time to let your friends know that you have a boyfriend."

Just hearing those words makes me excited. "I like it when you say you are my boyfriend."

"Well, I am." Armando stretched his arm and laid it over my shoulder. "Maybe we should... I don't know, go out with them and eat somewhere, the four of us."

"Go out and eat? But you already know them."

"I know, I know. But they are part of your life, right? I mean, they are your friends. You three are the Booze. And I want to be part of your life. So, I don't know. Wouldn't it be cool if we all got along?"

I think about it for a moment. "Wouldn't it be weird? You know, considering..." I try to tiptoe around the subject but there is no good way of saying it so I just decide to be frank. "Considering Captain and you used to date?"

"Don't worry about Morgan. He and I dated, yes. But I don't care about it and I doubt he cares about it, too. In fact, I'm surprised if he even remembers."

I gave him a weird look. "How could he not remember? You are great,"

Armando blushed a little. "Thanks, dear John. But I bet Morgan doesn't think so. Well, maybe at first. See, he was good at dating, we went to the movies, had a picnic, and even went mountain biking once. He was really into sports. Oh, and he liked gifting me things, flowers mostly but I think I still have a heart-shaped necklace and a framed photo he gave me too; it must be in one of the boxes in my attic."

"Sounds like he was into you."

"I don't know, but when it all ended he was... meh."

"Meh?" I say. "So, you two dating and breaking up... wasn't a big deal?" Armando waved his head. I persisted. "Because, when Buch told me something had happened between you two he made it sound like a big deal. Maybe Captain didn't show it but he may have had a rough time after you left him."

Armando laughed at that. "I don't think so, Johnny."

"Why?" I was confused.

Armando, my boyfriend, however, gave me a comforting look. "I don't think Morgan had a rough time because I didn't leave him. Morgan left me."

"He left you?" I was surprised. For some reason I had always thought it had been the other way around. "Why?"

"Yeah, well, we weren't the greatest couple. We weren't satisfied with the other's company. The problem, I think, was... another guy caught his eye." Armando raised his head, thinking. "He didn't cheat on me, but he broke up with me so he could chase some other cuties. So, as I said, I bet he doesn't really miss me."

Those words got buried in my mind. Captain and Armando's relationship wasn't at all like I had imagined. It sounded a lot more uneventful than what Buch had led me to believe. In my mind, Captain didn't want me to date Armando, because he was still into him. Didn't Buch say something like that? I was about to ask but then, another question came to my mind. "When did you two dated?"

For that one, Armando took a second, thinking. "Before high school."


***



I said nothing in response. However, I kept thinking and replaying that conversation in my mind. I didn't know why but something didn't quite fit and I didn't know what it was. It all got to a point that, in early February, at school, I asked Buch and Captain to go out with me so we could speak. My intention was to find that thing that didn't fit and to invite them to grab a bite with Armando and me.

We went to Buch's house after school but that reunion produced no results. I told them Armando was my boyfriend so that was out of the way, still... I managed to invite them to go out with me and Armando. I decided to go to the Taco Place Captain liked.

A few days passed until, finally, the day of the Taco place arrived. To say I was nervous would have been an understatement. There wasn't a good reason why, but having my two best friends sitting across the table from my new boyfriend was, for some reason, very shocking to me. I kept picturing it as an interview, a combination of two important but so far separate parts of my life. I had never had a relationship like this one before. I always said I was waiting for the one, for me to fall for someone, to really fall. Well, this was it. I had fallen.

"Are you sure about this?" I asked Armando as we both walked through the mall towards Taco Place. Every step we took made me a little more self-aware: I was walking with my boyfriend, holding his hand.

"They are your friends," Armando said with a smile. I didn't know how but he didn't sound worried at all. "And I'm your boyfriend. Besides, you already told them the other day, didn't you? See? There's nothing to worry about. Morgan gave you his blessing and Buch will surely make us all laugh."

I didn't respond but I held his hand more firmly in mine. We kept walking until the Japanese restaurant and that Taco Place came into view. Even from a distance, I could see Captain and Buch sitting there, their black and red hairstyles standing out from the crowd.

We kept walking. When we got closer, I felt their eyes falling on us. First on me, then on Armando, and finally over our hands, holding each other. I had already told them we were a couple when I visited them at Buch's house but, still, this felt like a first impression.

"Johnny!" Buch greeted us as soon as we entered the Taco Place. "How are you, sister? And... oh my God, is that Armando?" He joked, faking surprise.

I smiled at Buch. I had forgotten how easy conversations are for him. Mentally, I thanked him; his jokes made it a little easier for me. To my side, Armando and Captain were also laughing.

"Buch, Morgan," Armando turned to them. "I'm glad to see you again."

"You too," Captain replied as we took our seats at the table. It was in the outdoor section of the restaurant. There weren't too many people out there so the air didn't feel crowded or uncomfortable. I relaxed as soon as I sat down.

"You too," Buch repeated before stretching his hands across the table. "And, just to be clear here, we are sorry about everything that happened."

"Both of us are," Captain completed. "Particularly to you, Johnny. That thing we did wasn't... the nicest thing to do. Sorry."

"Thank you, guys," I smiled. Both of them had already apologized but hearing them say that made me feel better. Especially having them say it together. "Really, I appreciate it. And even though it was a bad thing, in a weird way, I'm glad you did it because that is how I met Armando."

"No matter what happened, I'm satisfied now." I felt Armando squeezing my hand a little bit. "I'm glad I met you, dear, John."

My instinct made me lean a bit to kiss him but I stopped in time, realizing Buch and Captain were in front of me. Armando noticed, though, giving me a discreet wink. I tried to think of something else so I turned to my friends.

"Oh, and Captain, thank you," I said then, suddenly remembering. "You know, for being understanding about me and Armando, about you know..."

Captain shrugs it off. "Don't worry, I just want you to be happy, Johnny."


***



"He said that?" You cut me. "He actually said that? `I just want you to be happy?' Really? Buch said Morgan had such a big issue about Armando that you couldn't go after him until after the Halloween Party but now, he just says that?"

"Yeah, he said that," I reply. "Don't interrupt."


***



"You know, you don't look half-bad together," Buch mentioned a little bit later, looking at Armando and I. "I'm glad one of us, at least one member of Booze, is in a relationship that lasts more than two weeks. About time."

"Two weeks?" Armando murmured, giving me a look.

I turned away from him. I had already told Captain and Buch about me dating Armando but I had left out all the details. I took a deep breath. "We've been dating for more than two weeks," I corrected Buch. "Armando and I have actually been dating for about three months. Ever since November to be precise."

"What?" Captain and Buch exchanged a look. "And you didn't tell us?"

"Oh, so that is why you wanted us to come here," Buch added cheekily. "Is this your big I-got-married-in-secret moment?"

"I didn't get married!" I replied. "If I had gotten married I totally would've told you."

"I used to think so but now with this secret relationship I'm not so sure, sister," Buch gave me a fake stern look before smiling and taping Captain. "But, we can't blame him. I mean, we did pay someone to date him."

"It was my idea, yeah, but you helped," Captain told Buch between laughs. It was the first time he had talked in a while.

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?" I joked. "And you wonder why I didn't invite you to my secret wedding."

We all laughed. "It's okay, I don't blame you," Buch leaned towards the table. "Why on Earth did you choose this restaurant?" We all laughed a little bit more. If the evening carried on that way, I was going to end with my cheeks hurting. "Don't get me wrong, I like tacos but you know, I work right there," he pointed to the sushi place across, not six meters away.

"Don't look at me, it was John's idea," Armando said, deflecting.

When everyone looked at me, I raised my shoulders. "I chose it because..." then, instead of answering I raised my hand and called the waitress. She gave me a quick look before walking towards our table.

"Ready to order?" She asked automatically as if she was reading from a tired script but then, her eyes landed on Captain. "Oh, hey Morgan. The usual?"

Buch gave me a very indiscreet surprised look before turning towards Captain. Armando and I just smiled, enjoying the show. In the end, we just ordered the 4-person jumbo taco extravaganza combo. The waitress went away without writing down our order in her notebook.

"That's why I chose this place," I said then as if I had just performed a magic trick. "See, ever since I found out Captain loves this place I've wanted to try it."

"Loves it?" Buch started laughing, giving us all quizzical looks. "Morgan doesn't even like tacos, sister."

All three pairs of eyes landed on Captain. "What?" He defended himself. "They have the best hibiscus tea in the city, plus the salsa is good."


***



"Hibiscus tea?" You let out, raising your hands. "That is the worst excuse I've ever heard and I used to date your father."

I laugh. "Well, yeah, it's a bad excuse but Captain used to go there frequently. That's where I bumped into him before Halloween, remember?"

The expression on your faces tells me how that doesn't convince you at all. "Okay, yeah, I remember," you say, mocking me. "Morgan used to go to the Taco Place a lot, so much, in fact, that the waitress knew him by name. But, somehow, Buch, who works ten steps away, never noticed. Okay, super believable. Now, continue."

I don't fight you, I just roll my eyes.


***



When the jumbo taco extravaganza combo arrived at our table, the four of us were equally amazed and horrified by the enormous mountain of tortilla and sauce we had in front of us. Yet, we were all so hungry that we all took a piece and started digging. Even Captain, who didn't like tacos.

Naturally, Buch was the one who carried the conversation. "...no, really," he said. "No matter what we talked about before you two started dating, Johnny would never shut up about how amazing your first date was."

I finished the taco in my mouth before talking. "Well, it was a pretty awesome first date; very... satisfying. At least it was to me. The best first date I've ever had."

Armando turned towards me. "Even better than our perfect date? Our second first date?"

"Second first date? Do tell. How was it?" Captain asked. He hadn't eaten many tacos, opting instead for devouring the side dishes.

"Amazing too," I said and mindlessly grabbed Armando's arm. "He took me to a paintball match against a thirty-year-old lesbian couple called the Skull Crackers, so yeah. I know, I couldn't be making this up if I wanted."

"So, naturally, the Skull Crackers... cracked you." Buch took a big chunk of taco into his mouth, trying to make us laugh.

"They did," Armando replied, too honest, too directly for my taste. "But my dear, John here saved me during the match..."

"Let me guess," Buch suggested. "He jumped between a bullet and you?"

"Not but he did save me..." Armando replied sincerely. I wouldn't have minded if he had exaggerated things a bit or would've told it in a more hyped up way but no such thing, he just stayed true to what happened. "He shouted as a distraction and saved me. But it didn't work because we kissed after that so yeah, that gave the Skull Crackers a chance to... crack us."

I tried to move forward.

"After that, I took him to an ice-cream buffet," Armando continued. "So you can imagine how happy he was. The perfect date."

"Still, not better than the first one," I added. "That one was really something."

"Really?" He challenged me. "I liked the second one better. I mean, I liked the first one too but back then things were... a little fucked up."

"Well," I faked a smile, trying to save the moment. "It was a little fucked up, but we all enjoyed that first date, right?"

"Dear, John, I was paid to fake a smile with anything you said, literally that was the point... that no matter how amazing or how much the first date sucked, you had to think it was special," Armando said, casually. God, there he was again, being too direct and on the nose for his own good. "Yeah, it turned out I did end up having fun, but all that time I couldn't get the money thing out of my mind. That's why I like the second one best. It was honest and real."

"No matter how much it sucked? What are you...?"

"At least you have two awesome dates to compete!" Buch intervened, avoiding things to escalate. I knew Armando was telling things as they were but man, his words hurt like fucking hell.

"I like your second date," Captain then said, again talking for the first time in a while. "Yet, you still haven't told us what you did on your first one. All we know is that you also ate ice cream then."

I glanced at Captain. "Oh, for as much as I want to brag about our first date, I think I like it being kind of a secret," I said. It sounded kind of douchy but I really didn't want to bring those memories again, much less after what Armando had said. "But thank you, Captain, really. I mean, for not minding me dating him."

"Oh, Johnny, stop thanking me for that," he said with a warm smile on his face. "You two really like each other, how would I interfere with that?"


***



"Okay, that's it," you leave your mug on the table and stand up. "You can't have it both ways, Johnny."

"What are you talking about?"

"What am I talking about?" You look at me, perplexed, almost annoyed. "Your story, all the things Morgan is saying... they don't make any sense!"

I sit back and drink my coffee. You take that as a sign to continue.

"Okay, so, you kept telling me that Buch didn't let you talk to Armando sooner because Morgan would get mad. That's why you waited until after the Halloween Party. But now you are telling me that Captain was all good and dandy and I support love, it is okay for you to date my ex, it doesn't make sense. So which is it? Did Captain care or didn't care about you being with Armando?"

I stay silent, drinking my coffee.

"Well?" Your arms are rising to the rhythm of your breathing. Your whole body is, in fact. Are you really that perplexed?

I move the mug away from my lips and give you my widest smile. "I've been waiting for you to notice it."

Your face changes completely. "You have?"

"Of course I have. I mean, it doesn't make sense, right?" I stand up too. "Why would Buch say that it was a big deal for me to date Armando, to the point of telling me not to go see him... but, at the same time, both Captain and Armando literally said, it's not a big deal for them?"

You start walking around the living room. "Besides, when you told me that Morgan let go of Armando and gave you his blessing to date him... I thought he gave up rather easily. I mean, what? He just heard you were into him and said `okay, you can have hiim?' That doesn't sound, at all, like someone who cares about his ex."

"Exactly!" I nod at you. "Besides, if he cared so much about Armando, why in the world would Captain choose him to fuck me?" I shrug ironically. "It was all Captain's idea, remember? If you mind or care about someone, you don't send that same person to fuck your friend. That makes no sense."

"I did think that was weird, to be honest."

"That's good thinking," I smile. I then look at myself and remember I am still only wearing my underwear. I shake my head, getting back on topic. "So, the question is: if Captain didn't really care about me dating Armando, why did Buch make such a big deal out of it?"

You raise your shoulders. "Maybe he got confused, or maybe Morgan told him something about..."

I say no with my head. "Remember, Buch said that he and Captain were best friends and that they told each other everything... but Captain never told Buch that he had dated Armando. Buch said he found out on his own."

"Then that's why he thought it was a big deal," you complete, full-on detective mode. "If you never keep secrets but suddenly keep one, it must mean it's important. No wonder Buch blew it out of proportion."

"Precisely, so the question isn't: why did Buch say it was such a big deal?" I say, walking towards you. "It's: why did Morgan didn't want Buch to find out he had dated Armando?"

We both stop for a second and stare at each other. Somehow, this is no longer a story but a case, Sherlock and Watson style. Well, maybe not quite like that but the clues were there, waiting for us to find them.

I look out the window and see the deep blue sky starting to become a little lighter in tone. The sunrise isn't far away.

In front of me, you take a seat again, taking occasional sips from the mug. That position you are in right now was the position I found myself in that night at Taco Place. While Armando, Buch, and Captain talked, I started thinking about all these things, this mystery dancing around my head.

Finally, you raise your head.

"Johnny," you call me. "Now that you mention it, what's up with Captain and that restaurant? He clearly frequented Taco Place but Buch, who worked ten steps away, never noticed? How does that make sense?"

"It has an explanation," I reply. "But also, do you remember the first time I saw Captain at the Taco Place?"

"It was when you saw him with his `date'," you don't even hesitate. "But when you ran into him before Christmas he said he wasn't dating Morgan, but that he was his cousin so, that raises the other question - why did Captain lie and say he was having a date?"

"Yeah," I indulge you. "Why?"

You think about it for a second. "That's not so hard to guess. If that was his cousin, not his date, then Captain clearly lied to make you feel guilty so you'd go to the party. He was pretty insistent about it too."

"And why did he want me at the Halloween party? He could've just gone with Buch."

"No, he said Buch would only go if you went."

I give you a smile and drink the last of my coffee. It is funny how we've been awake all night and yet, I don't feel sleepy at all. We both stand up to refill our mugs before returning to the living room with a fresh batch of coffee.

I take a glance at the window. We are in the blue hour, that time before dawn where the sky dyes the world in a pale blue. It has always reminded me of the ocean.

"Okay," you say, taking a seat. "So, Captain didn't want Buch to know he had dated Armando. He also wanted Buch to go to the Halloween party and he frequently visited the restaurant in front of where Buch worked, right?"

"Right," I sit down too. "Now, I have two more questions for you: when did Armando and Captain date, and why they broke up?"

"You told me just a minute ago," you reply, taking your hands to your head. "Armando said they dated before high school and they broke up because Captain fell for someone else."

I give you a smile, a knowledgeable, magical smile. "And who else did Captain date before high school?"

"Well, you said he used to have a girlfriend but that wasn't such a big deal for her because you said he cheated on her with..." You pause, leaving your sentence floating in the air, unfinished. I see you as your eyes grow wide and your jaw drops, the loose ends starting to fit in the picture. It only takes you a second but it feels like you've discovered a whole new continent. "Buch," you say, finally. "Was this all about Buch?"

I don't respond, I just stretch my arms as if I was the circus host, showing all the animals, magicians, and tricks before your eyes. This is the show, my story. And now you are witnessing it all.

"But," you make me pause my thoughts. "Let's say Captain dated Armando and then broke things up with him to go date Buch. That would only prove that Captain used to feel something for Buch - not that he still felt something for him at the Taco Place."

"I thought so too," I say, remembering my own thoughts when I was sitting with my friends and boyfriend at that Taco Place. "But then it hit me... the Halloween Party."

"What about it?" you ask. "Yeah, maybe Captain wanted Buch to go but he didn't do anything with Buch at the party so it doesn't prove anything."

"Are you sure? Because I recall that I told you Captain tried to kiss Buch and you dismissed it as something some people do when drunk. Captain did make a move at the party but Buch didn't return the kiss because he was..."

"He was with the phone guy he had just met," you complete. I love the excitement in your voice. "He was with the asshole."

"Yeah, Buch's attention was elsewhere. So, what did Captain do then?"

You take a second to reply. "He got super drunk and registered you and him into the costume contest. He was fighting for Buch's attention." You say, suddenly illuminated. "But if he was fine with Buch breaking up with him before high school, why try to get him at Halloween? What changed?"

"Well, this is what I was thinking while sitting at the Taco Place," I respond. "Tell me, why did Captain and Buch didn't work? How is Buch?"

"Buch," you scratch your chin. "Basically... he's a playboy, you said he has never felt truly committed to anyone, and even after dating someone, after a few weeks he'd just look for an excuse to break up with them."

"Buch is the non-falling-in-love type, exactly," I say, moving towards you. "So picture this: Buch and Captain go on a date. Captain notices that Buch is incapable of committing and they split. He feels okay because he wasn't the problem, it was Buch's commitment issues. But then, in high school, say Buch falls in love. Now, that changes everything because it either means Captain was the problem or that Buch has made some progress on his issues. So, Buch is ready for a second date."

You move the mug in your hands, thinking. "That would make sense but Buch never fell in love with..." I stand up and show you my body in a more or less comical way and point towards me. "Anyone. Buch never fell in love with anyone."

"Oh, he did," I blush a little by knowing you are looking at me. "Don't you remember? At his house, Buch confessed he had fallen a little for me."

"You are right! In San Valentines, he said he felt something for you and that you even agreed to exchange chocolates. So Morgan saw Buch falling for you, realized Buch was ready for a relationship and wanted him back."

I leave my mug on the coffee table. "Yes, and... remember the gifts Captain gave Armando?"

You close your eyes for a second. "Flowers, a picture frame, a neck..." you open your eyes in a second, letting them grow wide as you realize the truth. I am smiling, of course. I was just as shocked as you when I connected the dots.

"A necklace," I complete.

"A necklace! Didn't Buch say that he received a necklace on San Valentines and he never found out who gave it to him..."

I nod. "He assumed it was his mother because she called him that day."

"But the necklace had a B, right? Of Buchannan." You look at me and, by the way, your face starts shifting, I'd say you found something in my eyes. "Only that you mention that it didn't look like a B at all, it looked like..."

"A heart." I take out my phone, showing you an old picture of Buch wearing that necklace. "It's a heart."

You look at the screen but slowly your eyes set on a small infinite space, your thoughts and ideas are running wild inside your head. You look around, a little confused, maybe you didn't realize when you stood up. Slowly, you take a seat again. You are speechless.

"How does it feel to solve a mystery?" I tease you, drinking from my mug.

"Morgan had been in love with Buch all this time." You recite with an excited smile on your face. I nod, proud of you. You are like a kid with a big piece of candy but instead of enjoying it, your expression turns serious again. Then, you turn to me. "Maybe that is why they paid Armando to fuck you in the first place."

"What?" I almost spit out the coffee. What are you talking about? "That doesn't have anything to do with..."

"No, think about it, Johnny," you interrupt me, moving to my side. "Buch falls for you, you two agree to give each other chocolates for San Valentines. Captain, realizing Buch is finally ready to fall in love, gives him a necklace. However, it leads to nothing because Buch thinks it came from his mother. So, no big deal."

"No big deal," I repeat.

"But then Buch and you keep giving each other chocolates every month. Suddenly, you are an obstacle for Captain. You are standing between him and Buch. Now, you weren't in love with Buch so it would've been easy just to introduce you to some boy to mess around with but you never do stuff with people you don't like, you are the nun of the group so to force you out of his way he..."

"He paid Armando to date me."

"Precisely."

Now it is me who doesn't know when I stood up. So I just let myself fall to the floor. I had never thought about that, never fully tied all the loose ends.

"I had never thought about that," I say, perplexed. "Just to get me out of Buch's way? That is why all of this started? Man, if he had just asked I would've backed away."

You laugh a little. "He couldn't even confess his feelings to Buch but you expect him to tell you? Remember, you were the obstacle."

"I never thought about it like that," I say. "Back then, while we were at that Taco Place I only figured out that he was into Buch. I never put together that he being into Buch was the reason the whole paying Armando thing started in the first place."

"What did you do once you found out?"


***



After we were all full, there was still some jumbo taco extravaganza left on the table. The hour was getting late but we were having a good time. At one point Armando's phone rang and he excused himself from the table. I seized the moment to look at Buch and Captain.

"What a catch you found," Buch congratulated me as soon as we were alone. I took a peek at the necklace hanging from his neck. "Although he says `satisfied' a lot, that's a bit weird, isn't it?"

"Thanks and maybe, but I like him," I replied, not really paying attention. "But, Buch, I just realized something. Do you mind if I speak to Captain in private for a second?"

Buch gave me a confused look but a second later he changed it for a comprehensive one. "Sure, sure, sister, go ahead." He said while standing up and walking towards the sushi place. Not ten seconds had passed and he was already striking a chat with the cashier. He was really good with people.

"What was that about?" Captain asked me as soon as we were alone. He had been the quietest of the four but his face seemed curious now. "What did you realize?"

In my mind, all of the pieces I put together were rushing before my eyes. I felt like a detective putting them together but now, with Captain in front of me, I was feeling more like a medic, about to give bad news. I took in a long breath of air. I looked him in the eyes and, without beating around the bush I just said: "You are in love with Buch."

"What?" That was his first reaction. In his face, you could notice the surprise and the awkwardness he was feeling. Of course, denial was his first reaction. "In love? Come on Johnny I..."

I cut him. I reached out and held his hand firmly in my palm, squeezing a little. He closed his mouth. In my eyes, he could see how serious I was. "Why haven't you told him?"

Captain opened his mouth but no words came out. I felt his hand tremble in mine.

"You two dated before so you know he is in fact attracted to you," I said, trying to sound as calm and warm as possible. "Yeah, he is Buch so he has deep commitment issues but if you've waited this long and are still in love with him, then... go ahead. Tell him what you feel. He may not be ready for something serious but, hey, what if he is?"

Captain looked to the sides, then over my shoulder. He was trembling more and more each second. "I don't think he..."

"You don't know that," I interceded before he lost all courage. "Besides, if he says no and doesn't date you... how different is that from now?" I gave him another gentle squeeze with my hand, comforting him. "See, whenever we have a choice which's worst outcome is ending up the same as how you started, then it is a risk worth taking."

Captain made a sad face, lowering his head. I knew I was saying the same words he had repeated in mind countless times. Yet, he needed to hear them from someone else.

"What if he doesn't want to be my friend anymore?" He replied, scared.

"You already dated once and you are still friends," I said. "Besides, he is Buch; he is friends with everyone. And we are the Booze, remember? I'm here for you, he..."

I then saw Armando coming back to the table, I was still holding Captain's hand in mine and I didn't notice it until a second too late. Armando saw me but he said nothing, giving me a comforting smile instead. My boyfriend knows Captain and I are just friends, he knows how important they are to me.

I wanted to keep talking but Armando was there now, so I just looked at Captain and spelled "tell him," with my lips. Captain didn't react. There was an expression of worry and shock on his face.

"How was your phone call?" I turned to Armando then, trying to seem normal.

Luckily, Armando appeared to be engrossed in his own world. Not only that, he was excited. "Dear John, you are not going to believe this. Remember the thing you told me at the ice-cream buffet? That there is this place in the woods you used to go with your mom and dad?"

I nodded in surprise, guessing where this was going.

"Turns out that little town is called Laketown, pretty original name if you ask me," Armando gave me the widest of smiles. "So, guess what we are doing in two weeks?"

"What? Really? Wait, two weeks..." I took out my phone, typed in my password, and opened the calendar. Armando was looking at the screen. "So... we are going to spend February the 14 in the woods where my mom and dad used to go?"

"Happy Valentines!" Armando stood up and hugged me. I was genuinely surprised and more than excited about that. "I hope you are satisfied, dear, John."

"Oh, I'm so much more than satisfied."


***



"The woods," that's all you say. We are both sitting quietly in the living room, the blue sky is about to turn yellow and orange. Yet, "the woods," is all you say.

"So you know where this is headed," I reply. The memories of Armando and me in the forest, the shitshow, the way it all went down, they all pop up into my mind, forcing myself to relive it.

"I know," you say, surely thinking the same. "But why did you fuck up?"

I sigh. It is not a memory I'm particularly fond of, yet, that is where the story ends. "Armando... he took something of mine."

You stand up, looking at the window, ready for the sunrise. "What did he took?"

I stand up and follow you, looking out the window, read. "Well..."
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If you feel like chating, I'm here:
billy.alexander.wright@gmail.com

Oh, and don't forget to check my other stories:

* Us, For You
* Starboy

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