SIIN
We stopped at Al Bi'r but we managed to sell only a few pieces of cloth,
so we soon left it and continued till Ma'an. Here we sold our remaining
cloth, and also the youngest of our two foals. With the money we gained,
we decided to buy some of the jewellery they produced there: they were
not refined but had a simple beauty and we thought that perhaps we would
be able to sell them in one of the next cities or villages. Moreover
they took very little space.
Now the road turned decidedly towards the north. After a few days on the
road we arrived at Karak. Here we sold some of the jewels. While we were
buying some cooked food, we heard about a great salty lake in which
there was no kind of life but in which you could float without swimming
and without any effort. Amin, curious, proposed that we should go to see
it. We went along the tiny peninsula of El Lisah that stretched out into
the lake. The place was desolate, there were no plants and the soil was
of a dazzling whiteness. We were completely alone and on the lake no
boat was seen. We undressed completely and dived into the water: it
seemed almost to repel us, to resist. It was thick, oily and really one
could remain afloat in whatever position. It was indeed a strange
sensation. Amin splashed about in the water and entertained himself by
splashing me. After a while I too started to play with him. When a small
amount of the water entered my mouth, it tasted really salty and bitter.
After some time we got out and lay under the sun. My Lord had his eyes
closed and was enjoying the heat that was drying his skin. I rose on an
elbow and looked at him: his body was really taking good shape, he was
very beautiful, well developed in every part. To look at him was a real
feast for my eyes. By now he was maturing and he was no more a child but
a youth in the exuberance of growth. His chest was hard and well
developed, his stomach flat and slightly hollow, his sides slim, and his
legs firm. Hair had grown thick between his legs, around the beautiful
fully developed member and in his armpits, but had not yet thickened in
the other parts of his body and so his skin was smooth and glabrous and
now was starting to shine from the microscopic salt crystals, so that it
seemed a fabric of raw silk dusted with diamonds. I was lost in that
careful contemplation when I noticed that Amin had reopened his eyes and
was looking at me.
When he met my look, he just smiled: "Looking at me?"
"Are you sorry? Does it bother you?"
"We are more than friends. I do not feel ashamed with you."
"Your body is so beautiful..."
"Not as yours: you already are a man, I am not yet."
"You are becoming one."
I lay again. Amin, after a while said:
"If you were not one of my guards, Nadim, by now you would be with your
mind at rest in your village, probably married, with your children...
You never think about that?"
"No. In any case I would not be there any more. And I firmly believe
that it is Allah's will that I entered your service."
"Yes, it is certainly Him that gave me the luck to have you at my side.
You are the first fruit of my clover. Without you what could have
happened to me, what could I have done? Very likely I would have been
killed."
"No. Allah protects you."
"Surely, and you are His protection. Near you I have no fear. If it is
Allah's will, I will have my throne back... but in any case, more than
my throne, I do not want to lose you."
"I will never abandon you, my Lord."
"Because you swore it to my father? Because you are in my service?"
"No. In any case."
"Listen: I release you from your oath: if you wish you can go. You are
free to do what you like."
I rose and looked at him. He returned my look with seriousness...
Then I asked him: "Do you want me to go?"
"And you?"
"No. I will leave you only on the day you chase me away."
"It will never happen. But I was speaking the truth, before: you are
freed from any oath."
"Exactly: for this reason I choose to remain."
"Thank you, my friend," he said closing his eyes with a satisfied
expression.
After a while we dressed again, went back to our donkeys and continued
our journey. I was reliving in my heart that dialogue. No, I could never
ever abandon Amin. By this time we had been five years together. If I
tried to think what my life would have been without him, I could not
even imagine it. His presence alone gave a taste to my life. Sometimes I
felt that I should be able to show him what I was feeling for him, in a
better way than I had been, but there was no gesture, there were no
words that could express with accuracy and fullness my feelings. It is a
strange sensation when you become aware that the normal communication
means prove to be insufficient, inadequate for your purpose. I would
have liked him to be able to read in my mind, in my heart how strong was
my devotion, my loyalty. No, he was not only my Lord, he was much more.
Much more than a friend, much more than a brother. I could not find any
word which I could use, that could express all that he was to me.
We were now going back up the river that sustained the salty lake. Here
the vegetation was green and thick and after many miles of steppe, this
land was a relief for the eyes and the heart. We passed several small
villages and our commerce was going well. We were in the city of Qnaitra
when Amin had his eighteenth birthday. I led him to the local masjid,
explaining to him my tradition. He liked it and together we thanked
Allah. We left Qnaitra loaded with merchandise and headed towards
Dimashq ash-Sham, Damascus the Beautiful. At the town gates we saw
delightful little woods of apricot trees, fig trees, olive trees and
gardens with pulses and vegetables in plenty, magnificent rose gardens,
all irrigated with the waters of the Barada river.
We entered the town: we could not stop admiring its opulent beauty. The
splendid Omayyades Masjid, the beautiful stronghold, the enormous bazaar
full of life, sounds and smells. We admired the shining blades, the
turkish carbines of steel inlaid with noble metals, the precious tissues
of silk and satin, the ceramics, the enamelled glasses, the rich carpets
coming from all parts of the world: it was indeed the town of my
childhood dreams, the marvellous kingdom. Almost all the houses seemed
to have no windows towards the streets and that seemed to us strange,
but then we understood that all had windows towards internal courtyards,
shaded and cool. We visited Nuur ad Din and Salah ad Din's mausoleum. We
wandered in the town for hours and hours, never sated with what we were
seeing. At evening we asked for hospitality at an inn that displayed a
sign saying that they also offered accommodation.
We knew that the town was part of the great empire of the Sultan Abd Ul
Hami'd residing in Istanbul. Amin was really impressed by all he saw and
at night, when we withdrew to our room, he said:
"How big and marvellous it all is. Mine was a really small kingdom,
tiny, and yet to me it seemed big... You see how many things one has to
learn in life. Humility is a great virtue and you can never have enough.
My palace seemed to me a marvel, but then what will the palace of a king
so great to possess thousands of cities be like? I would wager that the
great king has never even heard of my kingdom!"
"All that makes you sad?"
"No. It just helps me to see things more clearly. Certainly it is Allah
that desired all this in order that I could learn from it. Allah is
great!"
Again I admired my Prince and Lord. If he had been in his small kingdom,
he would have surely been an unique Shaikh. I prayed to Allah to help
him to retrieve what was due to him. As if he had read my thoughts, Amin
continued:
"Who knows when the time will be ripe so that I may claim what is due to
me? How will I know?"
"Confide in Allah: He will certainly make you understand."
"Of course. Perhaps before He has to teach me other lessons! But on that
day you will be at my side: you will be my Grand Visir. You will share
with me the glory: it is a promise."
"I am just the son of a donkey breeder..."
"No, you are my strength and my support. You are sharing my exile, you
are ready to share my misfortune, you will share also my glory on that
day when Allah's will returns it all to me. This I swear. May I rot in
hell forever if it is not this way."
"Not for that, believe me, not for that will I be always at your side."
"I know! And that is why I am sure about what I say."
"But you can certainly find more able, wise, cultivated, intelligent
people than me."
"That may be, but I will never, ever find someone worth even a nail from
your foot. In you I have full trust, as I can not have and could not
have in any other."
I took his hand and kissed it with emotion, then murmured: "I hope never
to disappoint you..."
"You only hope, but I am certain, my sweet Nadim."
SHIIN
We stopped in Damascus for almost a month. Then, with a new load of
beautiful and precious merchandise, we continued our journey. We arrived
at Nebek where we sold some goods, then we continued for Hassié: our
commerce was profitable and we had put aside some gold coins. On leaving
Hassié we were going towards Hims, a bigger city, when we stopped to
consume a light meal. We had tied our three donkeys to a small dry tree
trunk by the side of the road and we were seated on two rocks to eat. As
usual we were continuing our trade: we had to gain much money to be able
to buy the wonderful powder weapons of the Turks so that we could give
arms to some men and go take back again the kingdom. Nobody had rifles
in our land and if we could buy enough, we would succeed easily in our
project: men and carbines were the key to success. We were talking
quietly when I saw Amin spring to his feet and look towards the east. I
too stood up and looked: I could see a cloud of dust heading for us.
"Mounted men... they seem many... could be trouble..." I said.
When we were in Damascus we had heard that in those lands there were
several badaawin's gangs that raided villages, assailed caravans and
plundered passersby.
"Yes, they could be. What is the best thing to do? They are approaching
quite rapidly..."
"Let us hide the gold and continue to eat..."
"You think we would not have time to go back to Hassié or to try to
reach Hims?"
"Race horses like those are much faster than our poor little donkeys.
With luck, they will not notice us or be interested in us... If we try
to flee, they will definitely come after us."
We hid almost all the money we had with us under one of the big stones
we were sitting on, then we resumed eating as if nothing was happening.
But we kept a wary eye on the dust cloud that was growing larger and
closer, and that inexorably approached. Soon, about forty mounted men
reached and surrounded us. A man with a short trimmed, black, pointed,
goatee beard, who was evidently their chief, reined in his horse in
front of us and questioned us with arrogance:
"Aren't you scared of us? You continue to eat as if nothing is
happening?"
"Scared, sir? Why in the world? We are just two travelers, we have done
no ill to anyone."
"You know who we are?"
"No, sir. Are we perhaps in your territory?" I said in a humble voice.
The man dismounted, seized my clothes at chest level and pulled me to
him:
"Don't play sly, boy. Here everybody knows who we are."
"Sir, we are strangers, we are coming from the Higiaz..."
The man stared at me, then looked at our donkeys: "What are you
carrying?"
"A few pieces of merchandise to exchange in the markets, to earn a
living, for me and my brother..."
"Let's see what interesting goods you have..." he said without letting
go of me and made a sign to one of his men who got off his horse, went
near our donkeys and opened the bundles we had put down on the ground by
the animals. He scattered all our belongings then said to his chief:
"Just a few small things, but not bad."
"Good, take them!" the chief answered.
Amin, at that point said: "Sir, I pray you, it is all we have. How can
we make a living if you keep from us everything we own?"
"And who told you you will still need something?" the man said, bursting
into spiteful laughter, then, whilst the other had gathered all our
belongings and brought them back to his horse, he approached our donkeys
and laid a powerful blow on the neck of the foal, who collapsed, dead.
Amin jumped toward him shouting: "Noooo!"
I blocked him as the man turned, his bloodied blade in his hand, raising
it again but this time aiming at Amin. So I jumped on my Lord making him
fall down and lay on him so that I was shielding him with my body and in
my mind I beseeched Allah to protect him. I felt the stroke landing on
my back, then I heard the noise of the horses hooves, the scared
donkeys' brays, then darkness came down over my eyes and I fainted.
When I came around, it was almost night. I could not see Amin. I tried
to move, but felt a shooting pain in my back. I gritted my teeth, tried
to turn and a little further away I saw the unmoving body of my Lord,
lying prone on the ground. I tried to see if there was blood, but my
eyes could not focus on his image and the light was too dim. Then I
tried to call him but from my throat went out just a wheezing rattle and
again I lost consciousness.
When again I opened my eyes, I was looking directly into bright sunshine
and had to shut them immediately. I heard voices, horses pacing and
feared that the predators were back to finish us. Then I realised they
were speaking a different language: I could not understand what they
were saying. Again I half opened my eyes turning my head slightly to one
side: they were soldiers, dressed as those we had seen in Damascus,
soldiers of the Great Sultan.
At that point I tried to speak and said: "Where is my brother? Is he
alive?"
One of the soldiers turned towards me and speaking Arabic with a strong
foreign accent, said:
"Yes, he is living, he is here nearby. The one who is worst is you, he
was just trod on by horses hooves."
"Where is he? I cannot see him!"
Then I heard Amin's voice: "I am here... we are out of danger, Nadim. I
too cannot move, probably I have a broken leg."
"Don't you worry. We have found you in time. Now we transport you to
Hims, that is on our road. In there they will cure you."
They loaded us on two horses and at last I could see Amin: his face was
swollen and bruised, and he had a split lip, but smiled at me. They
carried us to Hims and entrusted us to the soldiers of the little local
garrison, then continued on their way. The soldiers laid us down on one
of their straw- mattresses and one of them went to call a doctor to heal
us: I had a bad wound across my back and was bleeding very badly. I once
again lost consciousness. I came around three days later. The first
person I saw was Amin who smiled at me and whispered:
"Welcome back, Nadim, how do you feel?"
"Not bad... very weak."
"You lost so much blood... I was afraid I would lose you. But Allah has
been merciful. The doctor says that they did not damage any vital organs
and that if you remain still, in one month and a half you will be able
to stand up."
"And you? You have a broken leg?"
"Happily no, no broken bones. You saved my life... I was really scared,
thinking to lose you..." he repeated and a tear rolled down his cheek.
He lightly caressed my face, bending on me, and put a light kiss on my
lips, rising immediately and drying with the back of his hand that
lonely tear that betrayed his emotion.
"I am alive, I am living, I did not leave you. I promised that to you,
is it not so?" I said smiling sweetly at him.
During the following days Amin went back on foot to where we had been
attacked to retrieve our gold coins. With those he paid our food and my
care. I did not want him to do this: he had to conserve them for his
plan. But he answered me that this also was a lesson from Allah. There
was something much more precious than his war: it was my life, my
health:
"You see? I relied on gold, on wealth. On the contrary I must have my
trust just in Him. Now I understand. No more plan, therefore. No more
dreams until the time is right."
Two months and a half passed, but in the end I was fully healed. The
money was almost ended. We were asking ourselves what we could do now,
when something happened that radically changed our lives.
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