Date: Sun, 7 Jan 2024 18:13:27 +0000 From: Bill Drake Subject: Naval Tradition Revised 48 Naval Tradition REVISED EDITION Bill Drake (billdrake@hotmail.com) with Corporal Cody NOTICE: THE FOLLOWING IS FOR ADULTS ONLY. It is gay erotic fiction explicitly depicting sexual acts between men, including male relatives. If that offends or disturbs you, read no further. Thanks to all the great work that the Nifty Archive does and the writers it publishes. Please consider supporting them with a donation. This is the revised and retconned version of Naval Tradition, told in chronological order. While the overall story is the same, there is lot of new content here (and some of the old parts didn't make the cut in this version). This revision has been a collaboration with fellow writer Corporal Cody. My thanks to him for his considerable contributions to and inspiration for this version. Feel free to drop a line if you enjoy it: billdrake@hotmail.com. I hope to have a (free) ebook version at the end of this, so you can let me know if you want to be on the mailing list for that. PART SIX: BASEBALL DREAMS Chapter Forty-Eight Fayetteville, Christmas 2006 I tried not to keep checking my watch. It was Christmas Eve, and I still had my shift to get through before hitting the road to head down to North Carolina. Sean had invited me down to spend Christmas with him. "I know it's a long ass drive and you don't have long off," he'd said when we talked the week after our meetup in Philly. He'd explained the holiday would be low-key but there'd be dinner with a couple of his Army buddies. "But it would be great to see you, Jimmy. Even if it's just for a bit. Anyway, think about it." His gruff voice sounded hopeful. "I don't have to think about it," I asserted. "I'll be there." Dad had plans to visit my brothers for a week over Christmas. I had considered the option of driving up to Holt and Scott's for the day, but I now knew I had my holiday plans with Sean. As it turned out, Sean and I ended up barely talking in the couple of weeks leading up to Christmas, as he was away on a final Field Training Exercise before the holiday break. I was slowly learning what Army jargon like FTX meant. And I was getting a taste of what might come when Sean was deployed again. I had gotten a little spoiled with late night calls and phone sex on a regular basis, but now those were on hold. Even the usual quick texts were slow to get a reply from Sean, who was normally immediate in his response. On the other hand, the dialing back of our regular phone chats and check-ins made me anticipate seeing him even more. I had my weekend bag packed and a post-work change of clothes in the car, ready to go after my shift. Even if we were a local retail store rather than a chain, the holiday season was the big rush, and one of the reasons I was hired on. Plus, I'd already agreed to pick up a couple of my coworker's holiday shifts to pay her back for my Army-Navy weekend. It's what precluded me from accompanying Dad to visit my brothers. Even my trip to Fayetteville would be a quick turnaround of a visit. However, as a local, family-run business, our store was noticeably less busy in the afternoon. By 3 p.m. it was quieting down. By 4, the manager told me to go ahead and take off and to enjoy my holiday. He handed me an envelope with a card and bonus money. "Merry Christmas, Jim," he said. "You, too, sir," I said. "Best wishes to your family." As I walked out of the store and to my car, I pulled out my phone and called Sean. One ring. Two rings. "Hey, Hot Stuff," he greeted. "Hey, Chief," I replied, smiling at the sound of his rich baritone voice. "I got off a little early. About to hit the road." "Awesome. I'll be waiting. I'll have some dinner for ya. Be safe." "Will do," I said. I hung up and when I got in my car, I pulled off my work knit polo and slipped on one of my well-worn Virginia baseball T-shirts. I texted Dad to give him an update. After a long deployment, my father was overdue to see my brothers and especially his only grandchild - my niece, Emily. Matt had also finished up the last of his training and was due to be deployed right before the New Year. So Dad's plan was to fly to Jacksonville, and spend Christmas with Matt before flying to St. Louis for a belated holiday celebration with Paul and his family. John and his girlfriend, Rachel, would be joining them there. I didn't get an immediate reply from Dad, but knew I would by the time I'd made it to Sean's. Within four minutes of getting off work, I was on my way. I was nervous that the holiday weekend traffic would be bad, but about ten miles out of Norfolk it was smooth driving. I think I even sped some on the highway, I was so eager to get to Sean's and see him after weeks of little communication. At moments like this, I was grateful Sean wasn't further from me - of all the Army bases, Fort Bragg wasn't too far. But with each highway exit I passed in the dimming daylight, the more I was reminded that we were separated and we'd have to continue to figure out dating long-distance. Finally, I passed the signs for Fort Bragg, a sign that I was close. It was my second time there, and I now recognized the streets when I crossed over All-American highway, the road that led right up to the Army base, and drove into the suburbs of Fayetteville. I spotted Sean's familiar white Jeep Cherokee in the driveway and pulled up behind it. I got out and grabbed my bag, then sauntered up to ring the doorbell. A couple seconds later, there was a jostle of the handle before the door swung open to reveal the familiar sight of my hulking 6'5" Soldier. My smile kicked in automatically as I took in his handsome face, now covered in a dark, dense stubble, flecked with just some stray silvery hairs. He was dressed comfortably in a t-shirt and jeans as he stepped aside to let me in. I took off my ball cap and ran my blond hair back with my fingers, while Sean took the bag out of my hand, only to drop it there in the foyer as he shut the door behind me. I was never sure what version of Sean I was going to get, but he stepped right up and kissed me deep. His tongue was already slipping into my mouth before I felt his large hands feel up my lower back and pull me a little into his hard warm body. Taking the cue, my own hands began feeling him up, running along his strong lats and pulling some against the fabric of his shirt. Sean was a great kisser, and now I was experiencing the contrast between the softness of his tongue against mine and the facial scruff against my cheek. We made out a few more seconds, Sean pulling me into his body, giving me a chance to smell his woodsy cologne. I sucked on his tongue some, drawing it further into my mouth. Part of me worried the move was a little needy, but Sean responded excitedly, plunging in and out deeply with his oral muscle. The kiss had quickly turned lewd and sexual, and when Sean finally pulled back, I half expected Sean to be in full ravage mode. Or at least for us to start taking off our clothes. Instead, the Soldier seemed to regain some composure, even as his eyes continued to eat me up. "Great to see you, kiddo," he winked, still holding me close as his eyes scanned my face. "Glad you came down." "Me, too," I replied, a little giddy. I reached up and felt Sean's cheek, which was covered in that soft bristle. "You skipped the shave," I observed. His brown eyes brightened. "Annual Christmastime break from the routine," he said. "You like?" I did. If I had to choose, I'd probably go with Sean's clean-shaven, squared-away military look, but he looked pretty fucking sexy then. Then again, I'd been thinking about sex the whole drive down, and any version of Sean Carter in the flesh was going to fire me up. "I feel like a kid with a new toy," I laughed, running my fingers along his strong chin just a little longer before relinquishing my touch. Sean smirked. "That's how I always feel with you around, Hot Stuff," he laughed. I could see his own lust in his flared nostrils, but he let me go instead, hands coming up my back to gently rub my upper arm. "Let's get some chow and we can catch up, OK?" I could sense he was channeling his self control as he nodded his head towards the kitchen. "Sounds good," I said with a little laugh, feeding off Sean's amusement about how transparently my mind was on sex. It was going to be a warm Christmas, and it was nice to be out on Sean's back deck, the dusk very quickly turning to winter dark as he threw some dinner on the grill. "Maybe you can help me with the barbecue for tomorrow," he said, manning the grill. I leaned up against the deck railing close by, a beer already in my hand. "I'm not sure how much help I'll be," I said. It was cool to see that Sean was a single guy who knew how to cook, but I had to admit that I wasn't the best cook. "But sure." It was a good thing it was a quick dinner to make, because by the time we sat back inside at the table, I was starving. I tried not to scarf my food down so Sean and I could have a normal conversation - me talking about things at the store, Dad and my brothers, him about his three-week FTX and Army life around the holidays. I was surprised to hear how different Sean's experience was around Christmas compared to mine. I dunno, but I guess always having my family around skewed my expectations. I know Sean didn't get along with his father, so going home was not always his plan. But hearing that he had his military family with him made me feel better. "So it's gonna be a small gang tomorrow," Sean said, his plate finished as he leaned back in his chair next to me. "Kevin's deployed, so it'll be Joe, and a couple of stragglers. Kind of an annual tradition, though it depends on who's around." "I got used to having Dad away a lot over the years," I said, turning in my seat to face Sean, thinking of the parallel to my own upbringing. It wasn't the same as serving, of course, but our family felt Dad's absence for a lot of holidays. "When Mom was alive, Christmas dinner was always a big deal, but afterwards, when it was just me and my brothers... we just made do some years." "Jesus, that must have been tough," Sean said. He looked at me empathetically, and I had a sense he was talking about my mom's passing more generally. "Yeah, it was," I said, putting on a stoic face. "It was hard to watch her get sick... and then she was gone." I didn't often like to talk about Mom, and there were probably a lot of emotions I never fully dealt with at the time. "My big brothers looked after me a lot," I added. "I think that was one way they dealt with the loss.... Jesus, that was ten years ago." Sean patted my arm and gave it a soft rub. "Sorry to bring it up." "No, it's good," I said. I hesitated whether to ask Sean about his family, but I decided it was work going ahead. "So... you ever see your parents?" I asked. He shook his head. "Nah. I talk to my folks maybe once a year, usually around the holidays. I'll give `em a call tomorrow," Sean replied. "But it's been about five years since I've seen my mom. She was in Charlotte for some church trip. My dad's been even longer." I was tempted to pry more, but felt it was a sore subject for him, despite his matter-of-fact tone in discussing it. "Well, you know I have an independent streak a mile wide," Sean said, the cocky grin coming back to his lips. "But it's nice to have someone to spend the holidays with... thanks for coming, Jim." "I'm happy you asked," I said, turning even more into him in my seat. With perfect timing, Sean slowly leaned forward. I met him halfway, and we shared a kiss. It was soft, sensual Sean, slowly making out with me. His gently probing tongue had goosebumps breaking out over my flesh. His hand snaked up to cradle the back of my neck, holding me to his kiss, not that I wanted to break free. "Bedroom?" he finally asked, his voice deep and rumbly, breaking our kiss only to kiss me again. I nodded, gently pulling myself from his grasp and I pushed back my chair to stand up. Sean followed suit, letting me see the mound forming in his jeans. We smiled back at each other, then Sean muttered a soft, "fuck!" I laughed, pleased with the implied compliment but also feeling the same about him. He walked by, brushing his fingers along my trap muscle, then casually led the way down the hall. Sometimes he could approach sex like a military mission - hard charging and forceful. But that evening, his mood was relaxed, romantic even, and the holiday time had set me in one, too. In the dim space of his bedroom, we stripped off quietly, both of us holding each other's gaze as shirts came off, belt's unbuckled, and jeans came down. The soft light made Sean's furry military muscle seem even more rounded, and his dogtags dully shimmered between his meaty pecs. I slipped off my boxer briefs, and my 8-inches bounded up, jerking in a couple of quick successions until it stood fully erect. Meanwhile, Sean was peeling his jeans off his thick quads to reveal his solid, 7-inch, dripping dick. Methodically, he pulled down the comfy bed covers, and I slid in from the other side. Our hard cocks were the only telltale signs of our urgency. Under the covers, we scooted together and Sean's hands reached out for me just as I touched his own hip. Three weeks away from Sean could feel like an eternity, but it made the physical reconnection that more powerful. As big as I was for a 23-year-old baseball player, Sean was still bigger and stronger, and something about his physical presence next to me sent my lust into overdrive. I ran my hand up his side and over his hard furry chest. There's a look on a man's face when he's about to kiss. I'm sure I had it on mine. My prick nudged against Sean's steely hardon and his body hair and dogtags lightly grazed my own softer blond chest fur that was starting to grow in. Our lips connected, and I took the initiative to run my tongue along his parting mouth. We made out some, deeply, and Sean was soon plunging his wide, thick tongue back into my mouth. We clung to each other's muscle, feeling along the lats and lower back as we humped gently against one another and made out. It wasn't rushed, but we were connecting cock-to-cock and getting worked up. Finally, Sean began kissing along my neck, toward my ear as his bristly beard dragged across my exposed skin. I hadn't thought of that as a magic spot, but with Sean, it sent a shiver down my body. I could feel the urgency in the firm meat pressed against mine, moisted with our combined precum. "I've been a patient boy, Jim," he hissed. I knew what he meant. The last couple of times, fucking had been off the table. And now this seasoned Soldier wanted to be back inside me. I'm sure his desire had been fueled by our frequent phone sex, since our talk had gotten a little raunchier lately. "Fuck me, Chief," I growled through my teeth. Sean's barbed face was still in my neck as he dug his thick fingers into my firm ass cheek, but he raised himself up to look into my eyes. "God, you're a hot fucker," he hissed. Now it was my fat cock communicating my excitement to him as it jerked against my abs, and his. He rolled me onto my back and slowly began sliding down my body, kissing down my chest, between my pecs, then lower. My fingers running over his bristly scalp as his dogtags dragged down the middle of my abs. I was getting used to those metal tags, as part of Sean, an extension of him, but they didn't fail to turn me on big time, the sight of and the tickling sensation of them against my bare skin. Sean gripped my sides as he licked down the center cut of my abs. I looked down at him, his tongue out, licking my skin down each side of my raging hard prick. The fact that he was avoiding contact with my dick was driving me wild and I bucked a little, making him laugh and press down on my hips. "Easy, Hot Stuff," Sean grunted. "I'm gonna get you off... don't worry." I felt his hands snake around my thick thighs, curling underneath and tugging at my hamstrings. Silently, he was urging me to pull back my legs. Sometimes I was amused, and even annoyed, by Sean's hangups about who does the fucking and who gets fucked. But at that moment, I realized those hangups were rubbing off on me. I worried Sean thought less of me for bottoming so willingly. It was the misgivings I had about our one-sided arrangement making me self conscious now as I complied, pulling my athletic legs back and letting him see my blond-furred pucker splayed open for his gaze. But as I wrapped my hands around my knees, Sean didn't give me time for any doubts. Already he was down there, licking me with a soft wet trace of his tongue from the base of my balls, down to my vulnerable hole. Sean's rough hands slid down the back of my thighs until they were cupping each cheek. I looked down to see the bristled short haircut and his bulging shoulders. His tongue flittered more, surprising me in the ticklish-sexual sensations. It had been almost a month since I'd had sex with Sean and this rimjob felt different than before, almost like he had missed this as well. Or maybe my body was just primed for his rimming differently. I felt his wide fat tongue slowly lick up my crack then return back to my ring. "Fuck yes," I hissed once his mouth made contact with my hole. THIS was the man's rimjob I remembered. Sean's tongue methodically wetted me down with broad swipes against my entrance. He pulled back, only to gently bite and nibble at the soft, sensitive skin around my hole. And then I felt his tongue back on me again, circling and prodding against my pucker. I had been watching the top of his head as he did this, but now I relaxed my body and leaned back against the mattress and downy pillow while Sean went to work. That amazing tongue zeroed in on my hole, giving me a few quick flicks with the tip before it hardened to press gently at my opening. The man was spearing his way into me. I'd almost forgotten how thick Sean's tongue was. Gone was my lingering hesitation about being Sean's bottom. I gripped the back of my thighs harder to pull back my legs more fully. I wanted Sean to be able to get in as deep as he liked. He growled into my ass, tongue fucking me wildly. Suddenly Sean pulled back, leaving me to feel the cold air on my wet pucker. Then just as quick came the feel and sound of Sean's thick wads of spit slap right over my hole in a bullseye. He growled as he did it again, two, three more times, his thumbs pulling at my pucker, working his saliva into the pink crinkled folds until I felt the excess roll down my cleft. "Tell me you want this, Jimmy," he said, more softly than I expected, given the sexual edge of his words. He kissed my inner thigh, and I could feel the bristles of his beard tickle my skin. "Tell me you want my fucking cock." OK, here was my hesitation coming back. My ego wanted him to be asking for my cock, too. But he was right. I needed this. I looked down at him, and his hard brown eyes smoldering with a fire that seemed to wait for my answer. He cocked a grin as his fingers played with my pulsing hole, before his lips and tongue began tracking a path along my high inner thigh. "I want your cock, Sean," I said back to him, trying not to beg. There was only a lingering second while his eyes flashed. His hands pulled my cheeks open even wider, and he dove right back in. Sean's face smashed into my crack. I felt his thick, 2-day beard scrap and scour my sensitive skin, his square jaw so wide as I felt his lips lock around my ring as he began sucking and pulling at my asslips. "Fuck, Sean... yes..." I pleaded as his tongue pushed back into my now loosening ring. I rolled my head back into the pillow again. His mouth sucked at me, his jaw flexing, and his tongue fucking. My Soldier was hungry, and he was unleashing the hunger in me as well. He was slower in his pace than the last time, though, and the contrast between the deep probing of his thick tongue and the almost gentle kissing and sucking of his lips had a novelty that made my dick rock hard and dripping wet. For all our arguments about topping and bottoming, there was no doubt that I missed having my legs pulled apart for this Army stud. His brown eyes were hungry when he pulled away. In the lamp light of his bedroom, his dark-complected looks were handsome and hunky. I watched as he methodically reached over for the lube he'd set out. A couple of pumps and his hand was between my thighs, his fingers greasing my hole, rubbing it into my pucker with the pads of fingers before pressing in with a steady in-and-out motion. With his other hand, he wiped the spittle from his stubbled chin. I looked up and took in the view of his hard furry muscle, his dogtags, his tattooed arm, and the tight buzz cut completing the picture. I wanted him so bad in that moment, to make up for the time we'd spent apart. I didn't need much effort to relax for him, and two fingers easily became three. Our communication was nonverbal at that point as Sean's eyes held my gaze. He pulled his fingers out slowly then slicked up his long, hard rod and scooted forward. I wrapped my legs around his waist as he set a pillow beneath my hips. Even the fussiness of setting up the right position felt easy and natural. He leaned forward some as he reached down to guide himself in. I gasped at the smooth wet feel of his plum-sized, bell-shaped cock head nestling against my hole, gently grinding and rubbing, smearing the slick up and down my asslips. Sean leaned down even more, his hands sliding under my shoulders. In turn, I wrapped my arms around his thick neck, his dogtags now resting on my chest. My hole puckered agasint his leaking cockhead, almost kissing it. Sean was gonna be back inside me now, any second. It had now been over three months since the man had fucked me. So it took me a moment to adjust. Sean looked down and then back up into my eyes as he held his hardened body still. Then he applied the gentlest of pressure. I gripped his bicep with one hand and his neck with the other. His face was an inch from mine, and I felt his breath heavy on my lips. The closeness let me see that he was just as needy as I felt. I watched his silent plea. I nodded, even if I was a little scared I wasn't quite relaxed enough for him. He applied more pressure. I bit my lip and pushed on my ass muscles, feeling my ring begin to open up around the fat cockhead. Then, I felt him pop inside me. The last time we were together, we'd used poppers on the cadet we'd tag teamed. They probably would've helped me relax now, but this was so much better. Feeling Sean Carter's cock enter me, both of our heads clear beyond the testosterone and adrenaline coursing through our veins. Still, Sean's prick stung a little and I felt my ring stretch in that slight discomfort which also was a turn on. In a fucked up way, I enjoyed that it hurt a little. I could feel a tension in his body as he pressed more of his dick into me. Sean was fighting his inner urge to just root in and rut. "You're tight," he hissed, his jaw tensing. I nodded. "Give me a minute." My ring was slowly regaining its muscle memory, remembering what was involved in getting fucked, but I could feel my insides clench around his cock, trying in vain to push him out. Sean's lips curled, and more of him nudged into me. His hand was in my hair, brushing it back. "You got this, Hot Stuff," he assured me, enjoying how he was taunting me and pushing the envelope with me. "Damnit, Sean," I said. My reply had as much excitement as annoyance. "Tell me I'm wrong," he said, his brown eyes bearing into my gaze. Again, his hips were pushing forward. Already, like magic, I was opening up for him. The sensation started in the deeper walls of my ass slowly being wedged open by Sean's thickness. Then the outer ring no longer fought his entry but now relaxed around his cock. "You're right," I admitted. Sean's dick was entering me further, its length on its way to bottoming out. Those hungry eyes were now challenging me. "Three months and I gotta break you in all over again," Sean grunted, no doubt feeling the tightness as he watched my face. He kept spearing into me. Not hard, but a little steadier now, the man swiveled his hips and as he got further in, he clenched his glutes to drive the final inches into me, his balls tapping my tailbone as his pubes smashed into my cleft. "Fuck, Sean!" I hissed, overcome with the sensations of being shafted again - the stretch of my ring and the stimulation of my p-spot. I held on to his body to ride it out, clutching his muscle and tightening my legs around his waist. The Soldier pulled back and thrust right back in, all the way. Eyes on me, Sean was enjoying watching my reaction now. Again came another thrust. I nodded at him, open and ready now. "Hell yeah," Sean muttered and just started fucking for real, coaxing my chute to open up and accept him. He was quickly working up the pace. We'd fucked missionary before, but this embrace, my legs around him, his face close to mine, made our mating feel intimate. Sean's lower body was in steady motion, sawing his meat in and out of me, while he held his upper body steady, a serious look on his rugged face. "You ready, Jim?" he asked, his square jaw almost set in place, but his scruffy lips curling up into a slight grin. I realized he was looking forward to going full strength. Like our first fuck in Philly, like his homecoming sex in Tennessee. "Yeah," I replied, my voice now clear and excited. Bam. Bam. Bam. I was getting all of the stud's hard inches in rapid succession as his groin slapped my ass, his dogtags clanking. God, this was a Sean Carter fuck all right. Powerful, hard in its way, but hitting the right spot. Over and over, it turns out. Because the Army man was in the saddle again and taking full advantage. He didn't even have to use his full body. Instead, his thrusts powered about four inches of hard steel in and out of my hole. He leaned down for a deep kiss, filling my moaning mouth with his thick tongue, making me cling tighter to him. It was romantic and domineering at the same time. I'd never met anyone who could combine those feelings in me like Sean, and my own emotions were amplifying the physical sensations. My cock was hard and dripping over my abs as Sean's furry torso rubbed the underside. Sean's pistoning cock was opening my chute for him. I'd missed this. The fuck ratcheted up when he lifted back up on extended arms, his dogtags now dangling above my chest. The hunched over missionary position was easier for his movements and more comfortable for me. I gripped Sean's thick tensing neck, keeping his mouth close as I felt each of his grunts and groans over my lips. His skin shimmered with sweat in the dim lamp light. I tightened my legs to hold Sean tight, but mostly to communicate my desire for him. "I need it, Sean!" I grunted. "Fuck me." He liked that a lot. More power entered his thrusts, which were getting rougher by the minute. It was a lot to take, but leave it to Sean to get me to that headspace. Those brown eyes were on me with each stroke, too. The roughness was making my prostate go from feeling buzzed to battered and back to something else entirely, like he was gonna push all the semen out of my younger, athletic body by sheer force. "Like that," I urged loudly. His prick kept punching my butt nut and deeper, with each precision stroke. My blue eyes pleaded with him to keep it up, to keep pushing my buttons like this. "Oh God... fuck... Sean!" "Yah," he growled, seeing me getting close to an orgasm. Just a little bit of brushing of his abdomen against my hard cock was going to be enough stimulation to get me there, hands-free. "You're gonna... I'm..." my words clutched in my throat as I felt the sting in my pisstube. I grunted and gripped him tightly as I felt the pleasure blast through me, head to toe. My vision went white hot as I let out another indistinct cry, feeling my battered chute choke down on his cock. His prick kept pounding me while my cum ripped through my shaft and splatter up my heaving chest and streak just under my chin. "Fuck yeah," he hissed excitedly. He was getting a cardio workout and I could sense his breath was getting especially ragged. Still, Sean overpowered my ass muscle, fucking me in time with each blast, as if he were fucking the cum out of me. I kept my eyes on his, barely, and that connection only added to the intensity, particularly when I could see Sean's face get that familiar look of a man in sexual climax. "Unn...," he hissed, burying his cock as deep as he could, and I felt my deeper chute grow wet with his seed. Just like my own pearly semen that now clung to his torso and mine. He gave me the smallest of jabs, timed with each blast. I watched him savor the clenching of my own orgasming muscles coiling around his cock. I held him through it, keeping him lodged in me until he was drained. Sean slowed his hips, but not before burying deep, all the way deep, one last time. He stayed there for a moment as we caught our breath, sweat sheening both our bodies. "Damn," he muttered as we held each other's stare and grinned at each other. There were no words, but it was clear that he knew I loved every second of it. Then he leaned back up onto his knees, my legs coming undone from around his waist. Sean took my calves in his hands and looked down to watch his softening dong clear the breach. I hissed at the immediate tenderness. It was hard fuck after months without. I wasn't sure if I was leaking, or how much, but he seemed to enjoy the view. For my part, I was now glad I could stretch my legs and unclench my core. I relaxed back into the bed, lowering my legs as Sean sat down next to me on the bed, patting my chest. "Thank you for that, big guy," he said. He paused and his eyes took me in. There was something vulnerable and affectionate in his look that softened the harder features of his handsome face. "Love ya," he said softly. It was the first time he'd said those words, or the first time either of us had said it. It was very Sean to say it right after a hard fuck, but maybe for that reason it was the perfect timing. "Love you, too, Sean," I said. Relieved and happy I could say it, too. I realized I'd been holding back on my feelings. I felt immature and part of me worried I didn't have the experience or the wisdom to distinguish infatuation or puppy love from something more profound. But Sean's words had given me permission not only to say it, but to feel it. He lay back next to me, letting me curl up into him as he wrapped his muscled arms around my waist. I smiled up at him, feeling up his chest, my fingers tangling in the ballchain of his tags before tilting my chin up to take his lips, loving the feel of his bristly scuff and the taste of his mouth as he kissed with a slow softness. Eventually, Sean pulled back with a smirk. "I'm afraid I don't have much holiday tradition going on here, but it's a nice night out if you wanna enjoy a drink on the deck?" "Eggnog?" I joked. "Thinking maybe something stiffer," Sean laughed. We got up and Sean slipped on some sweatpants and a long-sleeve T-shirt with a zip-up jacket. I stepped into the bathroom to wipe off my chest and abs. I felt a little surprised at the soft sting of my battered hole. Sore but weirdly pleasant, in a way I enjoyed. Sean had gone rough, and I was reminded of the feeling I had after my times with Admiral Henson or even with my father's own oversized cock. I found my clothes and got back into them, slipping back on my sneakers. On the way to the kitchen, I stopped at my bag, where I pulled out the Army fleece Sean had given me. As I slipped on the olive green hoodie, I remembered how a part of me had felt silly wearing it, like a crushed out high school girl or something. But I had Sean's fresh load inside me, my hole felt pleasantly used, if a bit tender, and I was riding the emotional high of our first "I love you." At least for the moment, I was happy to be in Sean Carter's world. "Beer?" Sean asked as I stepped into the kitchen. "I got some good scotch, too. Though, you're a bourbon man if I recall." "Bourbon is good," I replied. Sean reached up to a shelf to pull down a bottle and two shot glasses. Handing them to me, he had me go ahead and take them out. Out on the back deck, I took a seat at the wooden patio table. It was chillier than earlier, but still not bad. The wind was still and there was a nice silent calm. Some of the houses in the neighborhood were lit up, but Sean had a privacy hedge that blocked some of the surroundings. I wondered how many Soldiers were away, visiting family across the country or deployed overseas. Sean slid the door shut and stepped out with two beer bottles in hand. "In case you need a chaser," he said, plopping a beer on the patio table in front of me. "And I had an ulterior motive for coming out here," he added, pulling out two cigars from his jacket pocket. "You interested?" he asked. I hadn't smoked one since that night that I met Sean and it felt like a perfect way to commemorate the time we'd been together. I don't know when it made sense to count things - since we met? Or since Sean came back? Or more recently, maybe. "I shouldn't make a habit of it," I said. "But sure." This time the cigar was easier to light and smoke. I didn't know what made one cigar better than the other, but Sean explained these were a gift from Kevin. He lifted his shot glass, which hadn't poured full, just a half inch maybe, and toasted, "Here's to Kevin, Hundred and First, 506 Infantry Regiment, Currahee. Thinking about you, buddy," he said to the night air. It was sweet and emotional, and we downed the whiskey. I took the initiative to refill to the same level. "Can I make a toast, Sean?... My brother Matt has his first deployment next week." "Damn, Jim," Sean sighed. "You didn't tell me." I shrugged. "I try to tell myself it's normal. And that he'll be fine. I'm gonna call him tomorrow, if we have some free time." "Oh yeah, you should," Sean said. Then lifting his glass, he gave a quick, "To Matt." He let the word hang, and I finished the best I could. "Navy Patrol Squadron Eight, Tigers," I added. "To Matt, Navy Patrol Squadron Eight, Tigers," Sean said with a raised tone. We clinked classes and let the alcohol give its warm, welcome burn down our throats. **** I didn't think I slept in late, but not only was Sean not in the bed with me, his side was stone cold. It took me a second to realize it was Christmas morning as I lay in Sean's bed under the down comforter, slowly waking up. I could faintly smell him all around me as I finally opened my eyes. The sky was still dark, but I could see the hues of faint blue coming through the blinds. Naked, I slipped out of the warm bed and slid on my T-shirt and jeans before I made my way through his house. It was empty, though the lights were on in the kitchen and when I stepped towards the backdoor, I could see him out on the deck, next to a big black grill. I stepped out. It was cool, cold even without a coat, and indeed Sean was there in a thicker parka, Georgia cap on, sweats, and sand-colored combat boots - and a beer bottle open on the table next to him. "Merry Christmas," I greeted, my hair still messy as the backdoor shut behind me. "Merry Christmas, Jimmy," he said back. "You're starting early," I said in surprise. Sean saw where I was looking and laughed, "Nah, Jimmy. That's for the pork butt. I had to get an early start on this beauty." He readjusted his cap on his head and turned back to the grill, checking a thermometer before nodding toward the kitchen. "There's coffee made for ya. I got some cream for you this time." "Thanks," I said. I really needed my cup to wake up some. I went back in and made myself a cup. I was two sips in when Sean stepped inside. "That puppy is good for an hour. Gotta keep checking it though." "Damn, that's involved," I said, laughing with amusement. Sean nodded, taking off his parka. "Can't rush perfection. Nothing beats Georgia barbecue pork." "Is that what you grew up with?" I asked. My family had frequented a couple of barbecue places growing up, but it wasn't as big a deal in Virginia like it was in the Carolinas. He nodded proudly. "It was the one thing Daddy would cook. Barbecue butt and Brunswick stew. Every Christmas and every Georgia game day. The high holidays," he joked. "It took me a while to get the technique down but now mine is better than Daddy's." It was wild to hear his Southern accent get thicker at times. "Maybe you can help me out some today," he said. "Sure. Just tell me what to do. I'm pretty helpless in the kitchen." "Don't worry," Sean winked, stepping around the kitchen island to stand next to me, his arms around me to hold me briefly for a quick kiss. "I'm pretty damn good at giving orders." He reached behind me and pulled out the coffee pot and refilled my cup. "Breakfast is gonna be pretty basic, I'm afraid." I wasn't picky. I had to laugh to myself that Sean's version of a basic breakfast was more involved than my normal routine. But in short order, he whipped us up a couple of omelets, and we ate, hunger catching up with us. Afterwards, Sean tended to the smoker while I went to shower up. I was sitting on Sean's bed, half dressed in just my jeans, my hair still damp and brushed back out of my face. I was pulling on my socks when Sean came in, ready to hop in the shower after me. "I don't know how much is the smoker and how much was the cigar," he announced as he gripped the hem of his shirt, pulling it over his head as I got to see his magnificently muscled body once more. He gave me a smirk as he sat down next to me to take off his boots. "But I smell like a fucking campfire." While he showered, I went out to my car to fetch the present I'd bought. It wasn't much, but I'd taken advantage of my store discount on a few things. I was sitting in the living room, waiting for him. The wrapped gift sat neatly on the coffee table. "I thought we said 'no gifts'," Sean grinned as he strutted in, skin flushed from the hot water, barefoot in just a fresh t-shirt and sweats. "We did," I admitted. "It's just a little something." He walked over to his credenza and opened a drawer. He pulled out a small, wrapped box. As he plopped down on the sofa next to me, one arm reached out and rested along the back of the sofa behind me. He set the box in front of me on the coffee table, next to his gift from me. "Good. `Cause I lied, too," he smirked as he leaned in and kissed my cheek. "You go first." I read the small tag, "To: Hot Stuff, From: Sean". I looked back up at him, I could see the anticipation in his eyes. I ripped the paper and opened the small box. Inside was a piece of paper that I quickly realized was a gift certificate for a hotel chain. Sean looked on with a smile on his face. "If you ever want a trip somewhere, Big Guy. Or just get sick of your crappy apartment this summer..." I'd told Sean some about the lousy living conditions minor league players could deal with, It was a generous gift, but more than that, I was touched by the thought of it. "Thank you, Sean," I said, feeling a little emotional. I gave him a soft, thank you, kiss. "Now yours..." I urged. You'd think Sean Carter would be a man to tear into a gift wrapping, but instead he meticulously undid each piece of tape and unfolded the paper. "It's just a few things I got from the store," I explained as he opened the box. On top was an Astros ballcap - black with a simple maroon star for the logo. "Wow!" Sean said as he pulled it out, turning it in his hand. "Nice." "Who knows if I'll make the team, but I figured you weren't gonna wear a Virginia cap," I said. Sean put it on his head, feeling out the fit. He shot me a cheeky grin from under the clean flat brim. Something about his older, more rugged face seemed especially handsome in a ball cap, and his stubble only made it so. The fit seemed pretty good. He looked back into the box. "There's more?" he asked, goofily surprised as he rooted around the tissue paper. There were just a couple of weightlifting accessories, wrist bands, that kind of thing. "They're great, Jimmy. Thank you," he said, leaning in to kiss me again softly. "Merry Christmas, Chief," I said with a big smile. "Merry Christmas," he whispered back, his baritone voice extra low and gravely before meeting me for another coffee-flavored kiss. More than a peck, but shorter than our usual makeout. I took off his new cap, setting it down out of the way. Sean waited till I faced him again to pull me toward him. We enjoyed the softness of our lips and tongues against one another. His bristled beard brushed my lips. Sean would be back to a sharp, clean shave in the matter of days, but for now I enjoyed the scruff, leaning into his embrace. Sean's tongue chased mine, but I broke our kiss before it got too deep. Our faces inches apart, there was definitely sexual tension developing quickly. "I have something else for you, Chief," I finally said with a sly smile. I stood up as he sat back on the sofa, watching in patient expectation. I fumbled with the button of my jeans then unzipped the front. I didn't really have any cheesy striptease moves, but I figured what was underneath was the important thing. As I pulled down the denim, Sean's eyes widened to see the clean, white jockstrap I was wearing... a classic one with a thicker waistband with thin blue stripes and the cotton-mesh pouch filled up pretty full with my fat dong, hardening up quickly. "You said you liked these," I said. Sean let out a low whistle and sat up. Reaching out, he ran his hands up along my bare outer thighs. "And how, Jimmy.... damn stud.... turn around." I did as he asked, proud to show off my body and jock look for him. Sean's large hands cupped my bare ass cheeks which only contributed to the fun of this scene. His fingers ran over one round globe of ass muscle, playing with the strap, then did the same on the other side. His fingers gave me slight goosebumps on my bare flesh. "That's fucking beautiful," Sean said while he leaned forward to kiss the inside curve of my left cheek, and then the right. "Lose the jeans," he urged. He let me go and leaned back into the couch. I looked back at him pawing at his cock in his sweats, his brown eyes fixed on my naked glutes. Under his gaze, I kicked off my sneakers and stepped out of my jeans. I was feeding off his lust as I finally stood in front of him in just my jock, socks, and t-shirt. My dick was now approaching full staff, constrained in my pouch, but I kept facing away from him to give him the best view. Sean gripped my hip with one hand and the waistband of my jock with the other, just below my back as he guided me back towards him. With my feet now free, I could spread my legs a bit more until my calves tapped his shins. I looked back at him briefly to see him knead my glutes and pull them apart. The man leaned in and began licking. His tongue didn't reach my hole at first but wetted my crack with soft, long swipes, which was lewd in itself. After a minute, though, he pried my cheeks apart to get full access to my sphincter. "God, Chief!" I gasped as he began eating me out. If the night before the man had been soft and sensual in his approach, he was going at it now, munching my hole and alternating licking and drilling against it with his wide tongue. He grunted into my ass then pulled back and gave me a light slap. "On the couch, stud... I wanna take my time with this." That commanding, NCO side of him was coming out in his horny voice. I did as he asked, his hands on my waist doing some of the work to position me face down. I pressed my chest into the arm of the sofa as my knees came up onto the seat cushions while Sean crouched down and shifted his weight behind me, getting right back to business. "Yes," I grunted while his square jaw wedged deeper. Once more, I was enjoying the novelty of his scruffy beard bristling against my skin. With an eager repetitive motion, Sean's tongue drilled back into me. In response, I pressed back on Sean's muching, growling face. The jock pouch didn't hold my dick entirely, but it did mostly, my hardon nestled against the couch cushion as Sean's tongue went deeper, some of his spit even running down my inner thigh. "Damn, Chief," I hissed. I loved everything about what Sean could do to me with his tongue. "Eat me out." I arched my back just a bit, opening up a little more for him. Sean gathered the jock waistband in his fist, just above my ass, to pull me back onto his mouth. Firm, steady jabs of that oral muscle slipped past my ring each time and had me relaxing some. With a really intense rimjob there was also that ticklish sensation that added to the more purely pleasurable ones of my hole. Sean's tongue licked higher. Soon he was kissing my glutes and lower back. Then higher, until he bent over me, kissing and nibbling the sliver of exposed shoulder from under my shirt. "You got an amazing ass, Jimmy," he hissed, his lips seeking out the spot behind my ear. I felt his heavy, strong body on top of mine press down on me and smelled his cologne in my nostrils. I loved the feeling of him, and the way I could feel that military muscle from between our T-shirts. I reached back with one hand to run my fingers over the back of his buzzed head while his lips and beard brushed over my neck. It took me a second to realize his cock was out. Bared and now humping my spit-soaked crack, the underside of his shaft slid between my buns and over my hole. At first it was just horny humping, but pretty soon his leaking hot dick was lining up with my hole, gently applying pressure. "Can I get in ya like this, Jim?" Sean hissed softly against my neck. "I'll go easy." It took me a second to realize he wanted a dry fuck. He'd talked about that before, but I thought maybe it was phone sex bluster. The request was very real now. I could sense the urgency and excitement in his voice. And, damnit, I loved the primal feel of sex like this, being covered tightly by Sean's tall, strong body from behind. I had a moment of doubt flash in my head, but his dick was leaking a lot, I could feel its tacky slickness against my hole. It was the only lubrication I'd be getting. And I was as relaxed down there as I'd ever be, turned on by Sean and still feeling opened up some from yesterday's harder but easier fuck. "Yah," I agreed. "But easy..." I cautioned him. He nodded and leaned back, kneeling behind me as I stayed bent over the arm of the sofa. His hands were back on my ass just as the flared head pressed against my pucker. His thumbs dug into my cleft as I willed my hole to open for my Soldier. I gripped the sofa arm and I clenched my eyes a second, then I could feel my hole begin to give in to his persistence. The firm pressure of his hips allowed his cockhead to forcibly dilate my ring, his copious precum lessening the soft sting of the stretch as he entered me. Even with both of us now wordless, I could sense the man's excitement. His prick was steel-hard, too, harder than normal even as it nestled just inside my chute. He only held still for a second before I felt the power of his hips feed me more of his dick. I hissed at the lack of lube, feeling and fighting the tighter, coarser penetration as he speared further - stopping, pulling back, and then feeding me more. This was so different than yesterday's mating, but I relished the familiar fullness of Sean Carter buried inside me. Slowly, he powered himself deeper and collapsed back onto my back when I finally felt his pubes mash into my cheeks, That body contact turned me on and helped my clenching chute ease its grip enough to let his prick work back and forth. Sean's cockhead tapped just a little deeper, making me bite my lip. His breath tickled my neck and I heard Sean choke back an excited grunt. I knew I could do this now, and part of me was glad I could give him this special Christmas present. I pushed my ass back into his hips. The movement worked more of his shaft into me and let Sean feel the extra friction of my pucker. But mostly it gave him the green light, which seemed to turn him on as much as anything. "Oh fuck!" Sean growled. He knew not to go hard. He just moved a couple inches back and forth, over that friction. One muscled arm wrapped around my torso as his other hand gripped my side, just above my waist. Sean's breaths quickly grew ragged and his deep voice grew more tightly wound. "It's gonna be quick, Jim," he grunted. I loved hearing him out of control excited like this, and I spread my legs some in a signal for him to fuck me, hiking my ass back all the way on to his crotch. I wouldn't call the fuck super pleasurable for me, but I was starting to get into the pleasurable feelings of Sean's bare dick pressing deep inside of me and the warmth of his body covering me tightly as his hips fucked. His kisses grew more fevered against the exposed skin of my neck. "Do it, Sir," I hissed. I hadn't used the S word in bed lately, but it seemed right now. "Cum in me. Cum in my jock ass." This was like our porn-talk phone sex but brought to life. "Fuck!" Sean growled. He wasn't going hard, but his thrusts were quick shallow stabs in and out of my ass. The thrusts were ALMOST uncomfortable, but I loved the urgent feel of a man approaching orgasm. Besides, I was starting to get some relief from the amount of precum Sean was now leaking, just seconds before his real ejaculation. "Oh SHIT!" he hissed, but already I was feeling that prick go super slick with his load. The man's forehead bore down on the back of my head as his hips jerked and locked in me. His upper body relaxed a second on me, weighing me down with its heaviness before he kissed my hair one last time and pulled back. Breathing heavy, I twisted my body to look back. Sean was clothed except for the mostly hard dick still poking out, his sweats pulled down to upper mid thigh. He had a big, happy look on his face as he caught his breath. "THAT, Hot Stuff, is hands down my favorite thing to do. In case you were wondering." I grinned. I felt some discomfort about an inch or so inside my chute, but I loved that his cum was there as well. "Well, maybe that's more a special occasion thing for me," I cautioned, reaching back, my fingers pulling at my still exposed hole. "But I'm glad you liked it, Chief." He nodded. "And how." He slid off the couch and knelt on the floor. Already, he was guiding me back to a seated position. "Your turn," he announced as he hooked his fingers in my strap to pull it down, just off my hips. My dick had lost its steeliness, but it flopped out heavy from the pouch and was starting to rise again as Sean slipped the jock down my legs. He took a second to hold it up, examining the underwear with a playful admiration. "Hell of a surprise," he winked before tossing it aside. I leaned back, hands over my head and watched with anticipation as this tall stud hunkered down to blow me. My not-quite-hard prick helped him swallow more of it, and it was hot as hell watching Sean stuff his mouth with my dong. Maybe it was his mood, maybe Sean was just getting used to my size. But he was better at it now, learning how to relax his jaw around me and how to take at least some of me into his throat before gagging. What he couldn't suck, he stroked with his hands. He put his all into that blowjob, working me up and down. Sean took in a little too much, making his eyes water and a deep gag choke in his throat for a half second before he readjusted to a more comfortable amount. I curled my fingers in his buzzcut and just rode the sensations. It was amazing how quickly I was getting fully worked up again, and in short order Sean was coaxing a load from my balls. I felt that pleasure radiate in my cock head, and just behind the flared ridge, then my whole prick felt amazing. "I'm cumming, Sean," I warned and the resulting suction he gave me had me firing off. Six or seven heavy spurts, the cum worked up more from the prostate stimulation I'd just had. Sean swallowed, concentrating on sucking just the first couple of inches to help me ride out my O. "Merry fucking Christmas, Jimmy," he growled when he finally spit out my prick. His lips dripped with spit as he gripped my still spasming cock, kind of squeezing out more semen with his fingers. "Damn, Sean," I sighed, feeling that post-sex contentment already sweeping over me. "That was incredible... You're getting better at that." I hope I didn't sound critical, but I knew my own oral technique was pretty honed, and I wanted to compliment Sean for his efforts. Sean chuckled. "You got a hell of a lot of meat on ya, Hot Stuff." He gave a gentle tug at my still turgid rod. "Hell of a challenge." He stood up and finally tucked himself back into his sweats. I reached down and found my strap to slip back on. Sean went to check on the smoker. I got dressed and went out to join him. It was cloudy and cool but not bad, and it was fun hanging out with Sean like this. It felt special and normal at the same time. "Sorry I don't have more of the Yuletide spirit, Big Guy," Sean said. "I guess I got out of the habit of things. Don't even bother with a tree half the time." "This is cool," I said, leaning up on the patio table behind him. "Good to mix up tradition sometimes," I added. Christmas was always a big holiday for the McGraths, certainly, but since my mom's passing, a lot depended on whether Dad was home for the holiday. Sean smirked. "What?" I asked, feeling like he was thinking something. "Just glad as hell you came down, that's all." "Damn," I said, blushing a bit. "Me, too, Sean." We made small talk about Christmas and the holidays growing up. I had Sean explain his process for smoking the pork. It seemed pretty involved. He shrugged. "It's not too bad. You just can't rush it." He looked up at the sky. "I should be able to beat the rain." Sean gave the temperature one last check then we went back inside so he could make the mustard sauce. "Need my help?" I offered, following him into the kitchen. "I'm good Jim," he said, winking at me as he opened the fridge. "Won't take long." I looked at the wall clock. "I might call my family, if that's OK." "Oh yeah, of course," he said. I fetched my charged cell phone from Sean's bedroom and went into the living room to make my calls. I called Paul first. As a cop, he had swing shift for the holiday, but he'd been up with my niece for her Christmas, and Megan's family had come by late morning, and I could hear the din of in-laws in the background. Of my brothers, I probably now talked to Paul the least, but it was always good to catch up, and important to check in on the holidays. In his own low-key way, he was excited to see Dad and John in a couple days. I asked about their holiday plans and we caught up a little, but I didn't keep him long. I knew he had a busy morning. He and Megan wished me a Merry Christmas before I could hear the house getting noisier in the background. John was next. He was still in Chicago for the holidays. His girlfriend, Rachel, was Jewish and her parents were in town, so it wasn't going to be a traditional Christmas for him. It sounded like they didn't have much planned for the day - a movie and a dinner out. "Her parents are great," he kind of whispered into the phone. "But playing host is exhausting," he laughed. "I bet," I said. "So... Dad says you're spending Christmas with a new boyfriend." I hadn't really told my brothers about Sean, maybe because I had doubts about how official my dating situation was. I certainly harbored a superstitious fear of bragging about something that might not last. But I hadn't told Dad to keep it a secret, and he hadn't. "Yeah. Sean... he's down in North Carolina, so I came down for the day." I could almost hear a smirk on John's face as he spoke. A kind of glad-for-his-little-brother smile. "Well, I'm glad, Jim. I hope you have a good Christmas today." "Yeah, it's been great so far," I said. "You have a good time today. And at Paul's, too. Sorry I can't join you." "Well, you should come up visit sometime," John urged. "It would be great to have you up. Sean, too." We chatted just a little bit then said our goodbyes. Matt was the third on my list, maybe because I thought he might be the most likely to sleep in. "Hey Squirt," he greeted. "Merry Christmas." "Merry Christmas, Matt," I said. He couldn't see the big smile on my face but could undoubtedly hear it. "Um, Dad's kind of staring at me now. He says you don't like it when I call you Squirt," my brother laughed. I chuckled. It was great to hear Matt's voice. And while I loved all my other brothers, the closeness in age and the experience growing up together meant Matt and I had a tight bond that we seemed to pick up whenever we talked. "I don't mind," I said. "I'd probably miss it if you stopped.... you and Dad having a good time?" "Oh yeah," Matt said. "We decided to spend it in Saint Augustine.... it's been quiet, but Dad found a restaurant open today." "You getting ready to ship out?" I asked. I didn't want to bring up his deployment, but I knew it was a big deal for him. "'Bout as ready as I'll be," he replied. He shared some of the details - which ship he'd be based on and the general region. Matt had trained for prop planes that were the workhorse for delivering materials between ships. "Well, I'll be thinking of you, Matt," I said. I didn't know what to say to my brother, but those words seemed as fitting as any. I was used to Dad leaving, but not Matt. "Thanks, Jim.... so Dad's champing at the bit to talk to you. I'll hand the phone over?" I laughed. "Yeah. Take care, and be safe." "I will," he said. Then a second later, Dad's voice came on. "Merry Christmas, Slugger," he said in that rich baritone. "Merry Christmas, Dad," I replied. "You having a good time?" he asked. Parental concern in his voice. I didn't share too much about Sean with him, but I knew Dad was a little protective of me, given the age gap involved with dating Sean. "I am, sir," I said. "Glad I came down." "Good to hear, Jim," he said. "Sorry to abandon you this year," he started. "Seriously, Dad. I'm having a great Christmas. I miss you guys and all, but..." "Well, I'll make it up to you when I get back. A nice dinner out or something." "Sounds good." "Well. I'll let you get back to your time with Sean. But good to hear your voice." "Yours, too, Dad," I said. Then hung up. I sat on the couch for a bit. I don't know why it was hitting me just now, and not before. But the reality of Matt going off to war felt real - really real, for the first time. I wanted a moment alone as I tried to gather my thoughts and compose myself. I let out a heavy breath and got back up to see if Sean needed help in the kitchen. He was bringing the pork in to rest. I could smell it, and it smelled fucking fantastic. "How's your family?" he asked as I pulled up a seat at the island breakfast counter. "Good," I said. Sean wrapped up the pork and turned his attention back to me. "Yeah? That's good..." He could sense something in my mood. "You OK, Jim?" I didn't want to be the downer on Christmas, particularly because everything about this visit had gone so well. "I'm just thinking about my brother Matt, you know." Sean got a look of deep empathy. He walked around the kitchen island and reached out to squeeze my shoulder. "Sorry, Big Guy...," he said as his hands moved to rub my back a second. "Listen, if you don't feel in the mood to go over to Joe's, you can stay here, or whatever you want to do. I need to make an appearance but I can come back before long..." "I'm OK, Sean, thanks," I replied. "You sure?" he asked, one arm still wrapped around me. "Sure, I'm sure," I said. Sean smiled, slowly letting me go, rubbing my shoulder once then stepped back. "Well, I should shower off the smoke again. Think you'd be ready to go in 45?" I nodded. *** It was a great Christmas dinner, with chosen family. Kevin was deployed, but his boyfriend, MAJ Joe, was hosting. As he pulled me for a hug, Joe said how great it was to see me again and joked about how sorry he was for me that I got stuck with the abrasive Command Sergeant Major Carter for Holiday Block Leave. I had a drink in my hand before Sean even got the meat into the kitchen. Unlike Sean's place, Joe had his and Kevin's house here decorated to the nines - stockings hung and a tree in the living room. Sean introduced me to even more guys I hadn't yet met. They were all senior ranking Army NCOs and Officers, but I was quick to notice that more than a few were clearly couples. And Sean seemed eager to show me off, his arm around my shoulder as we made introductions. I didn't mention my baseball career, but with a couple of guys I revealed that I was a Navy brat, my Dad a Navy Captain. Mostly, I was quieter than normal as I stood next to Sean and listened to him talk about his Battalion's holiday dinner, and an Operation Toy Drop. It still fascinated me just how much rank and Army responsibility Sean had outside of us and our relationship. As the evening wore on, the Army guys shared stories about their worst deployed holiday experiences, each one somehow getting more comical than the other. There was lots of beer. It was my first time eating Georgia barbecue, but not my last. The evening improbably got warmer so we sat outside around the fire pit and drank more beer. I got drunk, and Sean seemed pretty buzzed. We walked home a little after 9. "Fuck, I gotta get up early tomorrow," I said as we put away the leftovers in the fridge. "I got ya, Jim," Sean said. "Alarm clock's already set." We had one more shot of bourbon before it was time to get ready for bed. I was too tired and maybe too drunk for sex, and Sean didn't seem to make any overture either as we stripped and crawled into Sean's big bed. But it felt nice to have his warm, naked body snuggle up to mine briefly for one last kiss. "Merry Christmas, Sean," I murmured against his lips. "Merry Christmas, Jim," Sean muttered back. The alcohol was lulling me to sleep as I inhaled Sean's scent around me. "Love you," I mumbled as my eyes grew heavy. The words were still new, and a superstitious part of me didn't want to wear out the magic of them. I felt rough fingers in my hair. "Love you, too," I heard as the sleep finally took me.