TWT13 LUIS LOPEZ PILAR

On my block clout is the cornerstone of the street. Clout is influence and power. They call Chicago clout city. A long time ago they used to call it pull. They changed. I guess some motherfucker realized that we weren't pulling anything behind us. The levy system was broken. So we are sitting next to this broken wheel. We aren't able to pull it anymore so all we can do is push. Push away the pain. Push away the emotions. Push away the humanity. And when you've pushed away all those things then and only then will you have clout.

"We proved our point," Meech says, "We shouldn't do this."
We've surrounded Yusef and Ty. A part of me realized that he was going to do this. A part of me knew that Ty was going to back down and have cold feet when it came to pulling the trigger. He wasn't like me. Maybe that is why I was so in love with him. He wasn't a killer. He is one of the few people who hesitated to pull the trigger on my block.

"Meech..." is all I can say.

It's hard to argue with Meech especially when he is making that face. I look over at Yusef and Ty. Neither of them are saying anything. I think they might be hoping that Meech is going to convince me not to do this.

Meech stops me from speaking to finish what he was saying, "Lopez we can send them away. Maybe embarrass them. I don't know. But that's my cousin Lopez."

"And that is my brother!" I argue with him, "You think I want to do this?"

"I think you do," Ty says.

I turn to Ty. He's staring at me. He's always been difficult. We were both raised to be dominant from birth. Ever since we were kids. We both knew that this would end only one way. Maybe at times we tried to remember the fact that we had the same father. Maybe sometimes we acted like brothers but when it came to the streets the rules changed. You had to do what you had to do in these streets. It's as simple as that.

Meech approaches me. If it was anyone else walking up to me like that I would have pushed them away. My guys are around me. They were waiting for the order. They are looking at me wondering why I am listening to Meech in the first place. He walks close to me. He's dangerously close. The intimacy is clear as day but none of the guys have the balls to call me out on it.
Meech touches my shoulder. He traces the lines of my arm. I shiver. The boy might not have clout but he has pull. His wheel hasn't broken. Even with a touch he has so much pull on me.

"Please. Don't do this," Meech explains to me, "We're better than this. Ty and Yusef got the point Lopez. You run the block now. We all see it. We all made it clear. The Bakersfield boys are armed to the teeth. Send them away."

I look at the others. The Bakersfield boys are watching me. They are curious. Why am I letting this boy get to me? Why am I hesitating.

"Ok," I tell him.

"OK?" he asks me.

I nod, "You're right. There's been too much dying. There's been too much drama. We're all bad but we can't stoop to that level. The violence has to stop. The crime has to stop."

The Bakersfield boys look at one another. They are confused as hell. Tonio is standing there looking at me. He attempts to walk over to me and talk some sense into me. I watch as he even attempts to use his hand to pry a way between Meech and I. It doesn't work. I'm so close to Meech right now that it would take a lot more effort. I don't plan on letting anyone get in between us either.

I was in love with Meech.

Tonio gives Meech a venomous stare. He turns to me and tries to reason with me, "We can't just let them go."

I give him a hard stare. For a long time, I let Tonio believe that he was in charge of the Bakersfield boys so that I could get close to my brother. Maybe after so long he was really starting to believe that. The fact that he was questioning me right now didn't make sense. I saved his ass so many times when we were locked up together. Tonio owed me complete loyalty but right now he was seeming like a little snake. They were all snakes though so it didn't surprise me.

Meech was the only one who wasn't a snake. Meech was perfect.

"Tonio take Meech home and let the others go. Leave me a car and a gun. I'll drive Ty and Yusef out of town. I'll leave them but naked in Wisconsin. They won't be coming back."

Tonio shakes his head. He thinks I'm making a mistake. I'm sure he is going to run his mouth to people and tell them how I let Ty and Yusef go. The others seem to be a little uneasy too. None of them have balls enough to act on it right now but I was sure the rumors would start that I was soft on Meech. It was OK. I would just have to get tougher. I would have to make up for the rumors soon by being just as big as Ty was...if not bigger.

The block was mine now and everything that came with it was mine too.

It would be nice to be in charge completely and not have to worry about Ty. Truthfully there was only one thing I wanted more than the clout. I wanted Meech.

Meech smiles at me. It's soft. It's intimate. It's gay. He even licks his lips a little bit. I think he wants to kiss me right now. I smile back not caring about what the others were saying. By now the rumors were going to start anyway so I might as well just do what I wanted.

"I'll come over your house after I leave Wisconsin," I state, "If that's cool..."

Meech looks at me and smiles, "I'll be waiting."

Tonio sighs deeply but he does what I say and he takes Meech home. They leave me a gun and a car. I turn back to Ty and Yusef. They are still standing at the piers. Yusef is sweating bullets and seems relieved. Ty is just crossing his arm. Whether I saved him or not I knew Ty would never trust or have love for me again. All the love between us has been gone for such a long time.

Ty stares at me, "This about that kid huh? The baby savage that died."

The name didn't matter to Ty. It was just another young kid who fought for him. There were so many young kids who fought for him. I remember the first day I came out of jail seeing that little boy running around with a rocket launcher. That was what Ty did. He was the worse. I could run these streets better than him. I wouldn't have any kids working for me. That was for sure.

"That kid you are talking about was my son," I state.

Ty starts laughing at that moment, "Kenyatta's kid was yours! Wow. It makes sense now! You must have been really butt hurt."

"He was a kid," I respond.

Ty stares me down and says something I'll remember for the rest of my life, "Ain't no kids in the hood. They are just baby savages. They are just killers in training."

"Shut the fuck up," Yusef says.

"Who the hell you talking to?" Ty asks Yusef.

Yusef ignores him. I can tell Yusef is pissed at Ty. Funny how the only time he gets sick of Ty is when Ty isn't as powerful as he used to be.

Yusef approaches me probably attempting to shake my hand. I step back and show him the pistol in my arm before he gets too close and gets smart. He steps back and raises his hands.

"Sorry about that. I was just trying to thank you," Yusef stated shaking his head, "Man. You know I was wrong about you. Meech chose a good one with you. You two will be great for each other."
"I'll take good care of him," I tell Yusef.

I had plans for Meech. If I became powerful enough it wouldn't matter if we even came out of the closet. We could be happy together. We could live perfectly together. I'd make sure that he was my little lover. I'd make sure I'd take care of him. Everything he needed I would give it to him and one day...one day I would tell the world about us and we would live happily ever after.

"You just going to let us go?" Ty asks me, "That's dumb as hell."

He's stupid but he's honest. I turn to Ty and notice he doesn't really understand what kind of situation he was in just a few minutes ago. Maybe he understood but he just didn't care. I always thought that Ty didn't care too much about life. It took a certain amount of recklessness to get a lot of clout in Chiraq.

"Ty shut up. He's not doing this for us. He's doing this for Meech," Yusef responds crossing his arms at that moment.

"You soft. Just like that faggot Meech," Ty responds laughing at me.

Yusef looks at Ty then he looks at me. The others are gone but Yusef is annoyed at Ty, "He's doing it for love. Idiot. Something you know nothing about you piece of shit."

I almost feel bad for Yusef a little bit. Love made him betray his family. Love made him do some crazy things to protect Ty and he was just realizing that Ty didn't give a fuck about him. Ty was dangerous. He was an absolute savage. Savages didn't really fall in love. They might like someone. Hell they might even care to the point of falling, but they never fell in love. The only time a savage fell was when they got a couple bullets in their chests.

I raise my gun.

"Yusef you're right," I stated, "I'm doing this for love."

Yusef is sweating all of a sudden. He is breathing so deeply that I can see his chest rise and fall rapidly. He's panicking. I point the gun at the two boys and Yusef looks at me in a shocked manner.

Ty is different though. He understands. He even smiles, "There it goes."

I wonder what he means. It's almost like he sees something when he looks at me. Maybe it's something that he saw in me. What does he see? Why is he telling me "there it goes"?

"You said you weren't going to kill us," Yusef states.

"As far as everyone else knows I let you guys live. But I can't let you live. You both understand that right. I have to run these streets. I'm doing this for love. I'm doing this for me and my prince Meech. But in order for me to give him everything that he wants I'm going to have to get rid of the two of you. There can only be one power couple in Chiraq. You understand that don't you?"

"You won't. You said you were tired of the violence. You said you wanted something different?" Yusef tells me and points at Ty, "Don't you want to be different from that piece of SHIT!"

I just wish Yusef would have recognized earlier how much of a piece of shit Ty was. Maybe I wouldn't have to do this right now. Maybe I wouldn't have to end him like this.

That wasn't the case though. Yusef has proved where his loyalties lyed.

Ty knows the game he's played is over. He laughs, "Yeah. He'll be different all right. He's going to be so much worse."

I shoot several times. I shoot them over and over until they die and long after. I want to make sure they are dead. It's necessary they are dead. A lot of these young savages don't shoot to kill in Chiraq. That's where they make the mistake. Drive-byes were reckless. If you going to shoot at someone you better kill them. I look down at Yusef and Ty. They are dead at my feet.

At least they died together.

It's going to take a long time to wrap up their bodies and throw them in the river. I'm going to have to keep it to myself though so people think I let them get away and Meech isn't mad. I can't have Meech mad at me but I couldn't have the threat of Yusef and Ty lurking around. Meech would never understand if I did.

~

It's six months later. The doorbell rings. I go to the doorbell and I answer it. I'm shocked at the person that I see standing behind the door. It's Sterling. Sterling is just staring at me with this blank face on. He's grown a thick goatee. Maybe he's trying to look tougher or something. Word around the street is that Sterling has been making moves around the streets. He looks a little different. He's cooler. He's way more laid back and not as uptight. I have no doubt that he's probably out in the streets trying to start a charity or something. He's a guy from the suburbs. If it was anyone else, I would have been a little concerned but it's not. It's Sterling.

"What the fuck do you want?" I ask him.

"Meech."

"Fuck off..."

I start to close the door. The boy literally sticks his foot in the door to block me from shutting it.

I wonder if he notices the house we are living in. It's the closest you are going to get to a mansion around my parts. I rented out a whole warehouse. I fixed the upstairs for my prince and the downstairs I turned into a factory for the boys to package up drugs. It's efficient as fuck. I wonder if Sterling can recognize that."

"Someone told me that Meech moved in with you. I just came to see if he was doing OK. He hasn't been answering his calls."

Sterling has some balls coming up here. I'll give him that.

"Someone?"

"I can't say who it is. They told me not to say."

Interesting.

"He doesn't want to see you."

"Why?"

"Because he's with me," I respond, "And he's loyal and he doesn't want to see you."

I can't be too careful. After taking out my own brother I realized that you can never be too careful. Sterling may have seemed harmless but he was a good looking guy. There was no way in hell I was going to let Meech too close to this guy. I got Meech a whole new phone and made sure Sterling's number was blocked on it.

Sterling seems broken at that moment. He probably should be.

"OK. But hey if you see him can you tell him that I just want to check up on him?" Sterling asks, "I'm leaving town and I just wanted to see him before I leave."

I look at Sterling. A part of me wants to call up Tonio and tell him to follow this white boy down the block and end him. The problem with that is that Sterling was wealthy and well known. A dead white boy even in Chiraq would be problems that I didn't really want at this point. A part of me thought about just threatening him but I had a feeling that if I threatened him he would probably want to stick around even more. He's probably catch onto the fact that I've been keeping Meech away from him.

"I'll make sure to tell him, but Sterling I can't force him to see you if he isn't interested," I respond, "And honestly I don't think he's interested."

Sterling looks at the ground. I would feel bad for him if he wasn't after Meech. The guy was in love. I knew the feeling. I'd loved Meech from the first day I met him. I'd feel bad for the guy but the problem is he was a dog and I was a dog and we were in a fight over the same bitch. Sometimes the bigger dog just had to win and the little dog just had to disappear.

That's how some stories ended especially around these parts.

"OK," he responds, "Thanks though."

With that Sterling walks away. I text one of my guys who is around the corner to pull up and follow Sterling and make sure he leaves the city. The guys aren't doing much but sitting around on the block waiting for marching orders anyway. Now with Ty gone I was the one who was making those marching orders.

Within seconds I get a response saying: I'm on it.

I wait for a few minutes until I verify that Sterling has left my blocks. It's good. One less thing I have to worry about. I walk upstairs to the apartment in the warehouse. I open the door at that moment. I'm on a mission looking for my gun but I'm distracted when I see none other than Meech walk out of the bedroom and into the living room.

"Damn sexy..." I recognize.

Meech has on these short that make his ass look amazing. He walks slow as he sees me walk in. He gives me a long hug. Pulls up my shirt and rubs on my abs. He loves to feel on my six pack and within a matter of seconds I feel my dick getting a little hard.

"You're the sexy one..." he tells me.

"Baby was someone downstairs? I could have sworn I heard some talking," Meech says.

I shake my head, "Nah, just DJ and Kool-Aid. You know since Ty left all of his old guys have to come pay me any money they make daily."

Meech smiles, "If Ty is smart he'll never show up again."

I give Meech a kiss, "I have a feeling he won't."

Meech nods, "Well now that you are done with that...how about I take you in the room and take care of the stress. You work so hard for us."

He squeezes onto my dick. I'm tempted to take Meech in the room and pound his back out. Honestly we have sex way too much and it's amazing. There are fireworks every time I'm inside of him. Hell maybe they are really just gunshots from outside but it feels like fireworks.

"I can't bae. I got some business to handle. You seen my gun."

He walks over and hands me it. Meech always knows where I keep things.

"What are you doing with it?" he asks me.

I know he doesn't like me taking my gun out.

"Nothing. I promise. I just...have to see a woman about a horse," I tell Meech.

I've tried my best to hide the fact that I had to be aggressive in the streets to take control of it. Ty's boys needed a lot of convincing. There were a lot of breaking bones and a lot of bloodshed to get them to fall in line. The Bakersfield boys weren't much better. They attempted to turn on me when Meech moved in starting rumors that I was a "Sissy". A lot of those guys who started those rumors are in the river right now floating with Ty and Yusef.

"I hate the violence," Meech explains, "I just want it to stop."

I smile at Meech. I'll do anything to protect him. He's an angel. I don't just mean physical protection either. Sometimes I had to protect Meech from the truth.

"Listen baby. How about you go shopping, buy some things for the apartment."

"I'm broke," he responds.

"You're never broke when you are with me."

I reach in my pocket and pull out wads of cash that connected in a rubber band. He looks at the money and counts it.

"Baby you always give me so much money just to go shopping," Meech argues, "I don't need all this. I should find a job. I am thinking about hustling. Maybe going back to school. Maybe even getting a job. Remember Sterling...he had a job that he wanted me to take. He hasn't been responding."

That was because I changed the number that Sterling had saved as Meech's phone when I got him one. He probably never thought to check what number Sterling was actually saved as.

"You haven't heard?" I ask.

"Heard what?"

"Sterling is dating girls now," I respond, "That guy wasn't your friend Meech. Guys like him they come into the inner city and try to save people. Once they get their dose of what it's really like out here they are gone. It happens all the time. It's not your fault though of course."

Meech sighs a little bit, "Yeah. You're probably right."

"Hey. No frowning. Ok?" I state, "Go get dressed. I'll go handle some business. After I get home I'll take you to get something to eat and then I got a surprise for you."

I just got Meech his own car. It was a Benz. Usually you can tell who had money in the hood not by where they live but by what kind of cars they drove. I already had his windows tinted on the car and rims added to it. I wanted people to look at Meech's car and know that he was fucking with the most powerful man in Chiraq. Even if they were too scared to keep spreading those rumors I wanted people to know deep inside that Meech was mine.

And I was going to provide for him, by any means necessary.

"I can't believe how happy you make me man," Meech says smiling, "Growing up I never thought there was any happy ever after for guys like me. Not in the hood. Not growing up in Chiraq, but honestly I think this is what this is. This is like a fairytale."
I smile at my prince. I lean him into me and give him the longest deepest kiss I can. Every day I was falling deeper and deeper in love with him. Every day I knew I was ready to give the world to him and the only way I could give the world to him is if I took it.

And this was going to be a happily ever after for him. I'd make sure of it. I just had to tie up one loose string.

~

I end up knocking at the door hard. I'm banging on it. The door opens. My boys are standing outside but the person who opens the door looks at us with a clear disdain in their eyes. She steps back at that moment and lets me in.

"Wait out here," I tell my boys.

I walk into the house.

"How'd you know I was still alive?" she asks.

Kenyatta is standing there. She's still alive. She's been brutalized but she's still living. We'd all thought that Ty had killed her but I knew better. I ran these streets and I was smart enough to know when this bitch was around.
"I always knew. Figured Ty spared you because you snitched on Meech. That is the only reason Ty would probably have wanted to get rid of Meech so much is if he knew that Meech was definitely working against him. I assumed since you went into hiding that you wouldn't be much of a problem anymore."

"I'm no problem," Kenyatta states, "All I want to do is be left alone. Please."

She looks like shit. I'm not talking just physically. Her wounds were still healing. That wasn't the point. Ty did a number on her in that room though. He fucked her up something serious. It was mental too. Kenyatta just had this real defeated look on her face.

"I thought that. See I was considering killing you when I figured you snitched on Meech," I stated, "I don't like people messing with my baby. People die for less than that. But I felt bad. Ty did enough to you I thought. You've had enough punishment but now you still out here talking shit."

"How am I talking shit?"

"You told Sterling where Meech was," I respond.

I can see the look on Kenyatta's face. She doesn't even deny it. After playing stupid she realizes at least that there would be no point in denying it. I stare her down. I'm pissed. I have to admit it. Now she was trying to fuck up my relationship. She was getting real personal. She put Meech in danger time and time again. I should kill her. I know it but then I think about what Meech would do if he found out I did that. I already have the ghost of his cousin Yusef hanging on my back. I couldn't risk Kenyatta too.

I think Kenyatta notices that because she gets real bold.

"What are you so scared of? Scared Sterling might still steal him away?"
"This is over. Sterling left. I won."

Kenyatta looks down. She looks stupid. Yet again.

"Then why are you here. If you aren't concerned?"

"I have a feeling you might contact Sterling at some point and tell him to come get Meech."

"Meech isn't safe here. If you cared about him you would know that he isn't safe here," She responds.

I roll my eyes at Kenyatta, "Bitch. You of all people talking about keeping Meech safe. What do you want out of the deal of helping Sterling? You think he'll give you money? Maybe you think he'll give you this job at his family's company? Is that why you're helping him?"

She doesn't even defend the accusation.

"Doesn't matter."
"Let me make this short and clear," I respond, "If you contact Sterling and try to ruin my relationship with Meech there will be issues."

"If you were going to kill me you would have done it already," she responds, "You're scared Meech would hate you forever if you did."

I stare at her and smile.

"Wouldn't be hard to kill a dead woman, now would it? As far as he knows Ty killed you Make no mistake girl. These blocks are your world. I run these blocks. I run your world. After today you don't speak to anyone I don't give you permission to. You don't meet with anyone I don't give you permission to meet with. You don't even take a shit unless I give you permission to. You think Ty was bad when he had you in that room. You have no idea what I'm capable of."

I'm walking away at that moment. My threat is clear. My threat is real. Kenyatta was a bitch but I knew just what it took to put her in her place moving forward.

"Cold. Killing doesn't mean anything. Maybe that's why you killed Ty and Yusef," she responds.

My eyes get wide. I'm panicking.

"How did you know!"

She stops at that moment, "I didn't until now."

I look down at my pants. Damn. I didn't want to have to kill this bitch today. I really didn't. Sucks. I cross my arms though and stare at her. I wasn't even worried about if she went to the cops with this info. What the fuck would the cops do? They didn't care about a couple dead gangbangers on the Southside of Chicago. I was worried about Meech.

"You got a death wish."

"No I don't. I won't tell Meech. I think you know that," she responds, "You can stop being scared. I just find it funny that's all. He thinks you are the person he was supposed to end up with and he's completely wrong. He probably just let the love of his life walk out of the door."

"Sterling?" I laugh at the idea.

"That's who he belongs with," she responds but shrugs, "Oh well though. This is Chiraq. You get what you get out here. I won't tell him."

I take my hand off my gun.

"Good. Smart woman."

"I wish I could say you were a smart man."

"Excuse me?"

"You killed your brother. Who does that?" she asks, "I should be thanking you. I wanted Ty dead for years."

"We both did remember?" I ask, "He was the reason our son died."

"Our son?"

"What?"

"You've hated your brother for no reason," she responds, "You killed him for no reason. You were NEVER the father of my son idiot."

"You're lying..."

Kenyatta shakes her head, "No. Why do you think Ty took such an interest in the kid? Ty was the father all along. I won't tell Meech your little secret. It dies with me. That's just as a thanks for killing your brother over a little lie I told you. It was never your baby. You basically did all my dirty work for me."

I leave Kenyatta alone in that apartment.  I go outside.  I take a look at my block.  All the decisions I made come into mind.  There is a little kid running around.  He has his face covered with a scarf and is pretending to shoot a gun with his fingers.

Bang.  Bang.
He's not a kid.  There are no kids in Chiraq.  That's what Ty told me before I killed him.  There are only young savages.  Everyday we grow up and we become worse and worse.  I'm not different from him.  Ty told me when he died, "there it is".

At first I didn't know what he meant.  Now I'm sure.  There was the savage.  There was the man who would do anything to survive in a place where nothing grows.  My block was a concrete jungle full of bullet holes and dead dreams.  It was a cemetary of disappointment.  Meech wanted a fairytale.  There are no fairytales on my block.  There are no happy endings.

 

I see Ty in my mind.

 

"There it is".

 

We all had the tendencies in us.   We all had the tendencies to become a savage.  I always had the tendency to become just like Ty.  That's what he saw when he looked at me.

 

There it is...

 

The END

 

 

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