Date: Fri, 13 Jun 2008 19:16:38 -0500 From: juilian james Subject: what makes a family /chapter 2/ gay relationships/interacial WHAT MAKES A FAMILY BY: Julien This story is 100% fictional and is by no means depictive of the life of any person, place or thing. It contains sexual activities between males and should only be read if it is legal to do so in your area. Read at your own risk and enjoy. Comments are welcomed and would be very much appreciated. ENJOY! This will be a short mini series of sort. Comments are always appreciated. Thanks. J. CHAPTER 2 THREE MONTHS LATER JAMES David had been the first one other than myself to see the new apartment and from the look on his face, I knew he approved. "This is so cool! You even have a gym! Shit, this is so cool!" I smiled at his excitement and squeezed his shoulder as I watched with wide eyes wander as this sixteen year old got excited over a rusted apartment with an out of sync gym room. "I'm glad someone likes it." I stated. "It's not that bad dad. At least you have a decent view." And I had to smile at that. Our old apartment had a window facing a dingy alley and even though Neil and I had planned to buy a house, we could never agree as to the location among other things. "I'm glad you like it David, and I hope that means you'll drag your little behind around here more often." He looked at me and smiled. It was his father's smile and even though I was over Neil, it was hard for me to look at David and not feel as if a part of me had stayed behind with them. "It's just that I've been busy with school and stuff and it's hard getting all the way here with dad and all." He didn't elaborate and I didn't ask. This had to be hard on him. Having to deal with his father's reaction to all of this. "Well if you need a ride or anything, give me a call and I'll come get you, ok." With that, he looked up at me, smiled, and nodded. We spent the rest of the afternoon just basically chilling. He showed me the new hand game he had bought and told me all about his girlfriend Deanna. "Are you guys playing it safe?" I asked. He looked up at me all embarrassed and nodded. "Good. I'd prefer it if you weren't sexually active at all but if you're gonna be, I'm glad you're being smart about it." "I am." He confirmed. "And what about you?" The question caught me off guard and I found myself looking at him. "What?" "Are you playing it safe?" The smirk on his face was a testament to how truly funny he thought my predicament was. "That's none of your business." I challenged. But he was far from letting it slide. "So you are seeing somebody. When do I get to meet him? Is he cute?" I had to smile at his persistence but behind that smile I saw something else. Sadness maybe but I wasn't sure. I hadn't hooked up with anyone since leaving Neil but for some reason I didn't want him knowing that. "I'm not having this conversation with you kid so stop asking." And as if making my point, I asked about his father. "How's your dad doing?" "He's fine." The monotone answer worried me and I pushed the issue. "Fine? That's it?" I prodded, hoping for something more substantial than fine. "You walked out on him dad, what do you expect." And I'm sure his words weren't meant to hurt me but they did. "I mean he's still the same if that's what you want to know. He still sits around in his boxers when he watches the news and he rides my ass for being late for school, so I guess he's fine." His straight to the point mannerism meant that he was uncomfortable with where the discussion was leading so I decided to drop it, for now. "So, how are things at school?" He shrugged and turned his head to look out the window. His body language was off but that was about all I was able to decipher. It seemed strange, but after three months away from him, it seemed as if I were a stranger getting to know him all over again. "It's going. Testing is riding my ass but things are better. I haven't gotten into any fights recently so..." He didn't add anything else and I didn't ask. I guess I would have to find out about it from Neil. Neil Just thinking about his name made me shudder silently. I wanted to pick up the phone and call him. Find out how things were going with the rent, the car payments, his job, David's school life. But he refused to let me close enough to get a word out. Whenever I tried calling from my house phone, my number would not go through thanks to Verizon's phone block. And the few times that I managed to get through, he would hang up the moment he recognized my voice, not giving me a chance to say anything. It was as if he has obliterated me out of his life, both his and David's' life. He cashed out on our joint account and mailed me a check for half, took me off his life insurance policies, and requested that David be taken off of my health insurance plan. Not the most mature way to handle things but it was Neil's way of getting back at me. He knew how much I loved David and was trying his hardest to put a giant wedge between us. But David being David, the ever defiant one saw through his father's game and found a way around it. He refused to let me just melt away from his life like a bad dream, and for that, I was grateful. David's phone rang, interrupting me out of thought and I leaned into the sofa, watching him intently as he took his call. ""Hey dad, what's up?.... No I'm not at home yet. I told you I was going to stop by Jimmy's before I got home. Yes I did! Damn, I told you not to worry. No, I don't need a ride. Please dad! No! Do not come over to Jimmy's, you know how his dad is about you. Ok, Ok. I'll see you in an hour." I didn't have to think at all as to who was on the other end of his phone. "Shit! I hate how he rides my ass now that you're gone, it's like I'm 4 years old or something. I'd wish you'd go talk to him for me dad. He listens to you." His word touched me but we both knew better. "You know I can't kiddo. Your dad won't even accept the money I send you. What makes you think he'll want to listen to anything I have to say?" "Because despite all the shit you've been through with him, I know he still loves you. He still has up all the photos of you guys and that picture of us at Disney world, he keeps in his wallet." And as an afterthought he added, "He wouldn't even let me say anything bad about you when you left. You have any idea how many fucking days he made me stay in my room because I called you an asshole." I can't say I was surprised that David had held some resentment towards me, but the fact that despite all, Neil was a strong defender of my honor was more than a tough pill to swallow. But I wasn't going to dwell on that, I couldn't. Neil and I were done and there no going back, no matter how much my heart misguiding seemed to be pulling in that direction. NEIL It seemed as if it were ages since I found myself in this predicament, but in fact it hadn't been that long. What was different though was the fact that some guy was knelt down in front of me, my pants drawn down around my ankles while his hands caressed my ass cheeks. And even though the thought of this was enough to give me a boner, it didn't take much to bring me back to the present reality, and back to the fact that was in my doctors' office while he examined a lump stationed between my inner thigh and scrotum. "So Neil, I'm looking at this and it seems to have grown about half a centimeter. That worries me a bit so I think I'm going to go ahead and take some tests and send them to our lab for analysis, just in case." His words chilled my bones but I didn't let him know that. "Just in case what?" I asked cautiously. "Just in case," he repeated again, continuing with, "I don't want to give you any ideas. We'll leave it at just in case until the tests come back, then we'll go from there. Other than that blood pressure is good, cholesterol is good, your HIV test is negative and you do not have diabetes." "Thanks." I responded. I know I should have been happy, ecstatic even, about my prognosis but his words kept on playing in my head. I tried my best to push those thoughts aside, pulling up my pants, buckling my belt and sitting in a chair across from him. "So, how is everything going with David?" I looked across him and forced a smile on my face. Matthew Chase had been my MD since David was three, and more importantly, he had been the one to introduce James and me. They had been high school friends who chose different paths after graduation with Matt going to med school and James going straight into the military, then becoming a mechanic and later, going to university to become a social worker. It was New Years Eve of 1993 when James and I crossed paths, courtesy of Matt. And just thinking of that was enough to force myself back reality and back to the man in front of me, still waiting for an answer to his question. "David is fine. Things have been better since...well things have been better. We're on speaking terms again." Matt smiled at me and reached across his desk to grasp my hand, "See, I told you it would get better. David is a good kid. Remember what we were like at that age Neil?" He winked at me and let out a chuckle. Of course I remembered what it was like to be David's age. It was nothing like the pleasures he had the opportunity of experiencing. I didn't have hoards and hoards of games, DVD's and an ipod. I didn't have curfew till 11:00 and most importantly, I didn't have access to a car whenever I wanted. What I remembered of my 16th year was an 8:00 pm curfew, a no date policy, and a proverbial in the closet mentality, hence the reason that David is even alive today. But of course, I said none of this to Matt because I knew it would lead to one of his infamous counseling sessions where he would offer me an ear to yak off and a shoulder to cry on if needs be. And the last thing I wanted was to be reminded of is that for the first time in twelve years, my life was falling apart and the one person I could run to, was no longer in it. "Yeah, but still. We're adjusting though. We're fine." "Well have you spoken to James since you guys..." I did not give him the opportunity to finish his statement. This was one place that I did not want Matt and me to go. "No and we won't and before you ask Matt, I'm ok with that. Couples break up all the time so it's no big deal. They move on, meet new people and life goes on. James has his shit to deal with and so do I." The look he gave me told me that he understood my need not to talk about it (there goes the sympathy factor again) and for that, I was grateful. "Well I'm so glad that you brought up moving on because Michelle and I are throwing a get together this week and we would love it if you and David would come. And before you ask, it's nothing big, just my in laws, a couple of guys from the clinic, Ronnie and Jermaine and of course, your favorite person in the world, Dorian." I visibly grunted and shook my head, "Well if Dorian is going to be there, I might as well opt out. You know I can't stand that son of a bitch with his cocky attitude." Matt just smiled and shook his head. Dorian was another high school friend of his that I had been introduced to shortly after James and I had started seeing each other. To make a long story short, he had tried to fuck James behind my back. James being James though, let Dorian know that we were together and that was the end of that, according to everyone else. Matt and James may have been able to put that shit behind them but I was not. I didn't trust Dorian even for a hot minute and I wasn't above saying to so to Matt, something which he often chided me on. "This isn't about Dorian, Neil. You know me and Dorian go way back and believe me when I tell you I have dealt with him about all that happened. He would never step to you like that ever again. And besides, this isn't about him. Michelle hasn't seen you and David in ages and she misses you guys, and besides, if you didn't come, she wouldn't get a chance to ask your opinion on baby names." His words stopped me dead in my tracks. "What! Michelle's pregnant?" "Yes, pregnant with a capital P!" His grin widened and I couldn't help but grin along with him. Matt and his wife had been trying to have a kid since they got married six years ago. "Wow, I know you must be happy! When the hell were you planning on telling me?" He shrugged his shoulders and gave me a lopsided grin. "We've only known for like a week. We haven't even told her parents yet. You're the only the second person I've told." "And who was the first?" I asked, my eyebrow inadvertently arching. "James. He came by the other day to help Michelle with the car. It's been making funny noises under the hood and I've been busy with patients, conferences and all that shit." I tried not to let my smile falter at the mention of James' name but I had a feeling that I was failing that task miserable. Matt must have interpreted the look on my face as he changed the subject once again. "So I know this guy who happens to work in the psychology department and he happens to be single and he happens to remember you from last years' Christmas party and he happens to want your number and..." "And," I continued for him, "You happen to give it to him." "Of course not Neil, you should know that I would never do such a thing." "Good, because you know I'm not ready for..." I started and stopped as his words cut into mine, "I happen to tell him that I'd arrange an intro at the get together that we're having." He stated as he continued to look at me trying to gauge my reaction. "I know it's only been a few months but I think it would be good for you to meet other people. Not necessarily get into a relationship, but to meet other men. You need to get back out there." And I knew what he was saying was true, but was I ready? I knew the answer to that question was an unequivocal no but I didn't say that to Matt, instead, I promised to think about it and agreed to at least make an appearance at his shin dig, if for nothing else, to at least show I was making an effort to at least move forward, no matter how I truly felt. ******************************************************************************** Despite all my preconceived notions, I was enjoying myself. Matt's friend Tim turned out to be not so bad company and the fact that he was cute as hell didn't hurt matters. I didn't see us falling into bed anytime soon nor did I hear wedding bells in the background but I knew that for the time being, he would make a pleasant distraction for me. Even David noticed my change of mood as I made my way over to the open bar, intending to fill up on my gin and tonic. "You having a good time dad?" He asked, his eyes darting over to Tim, who sat on the edge of Matt's balcony. "It's not bad. I appreciate you coming kiddo. I know you would have preferred to stay at home but...I'm just glad you came, it means a lot to me, to Matt and Michelle too." He looked up at me and smiled. "I'm glad you're glad. It's been a long time since you've been this relaxed. So ...You like that guy cause he sure seems to like you." I tried to feel out malice in his words but came up empty. "I'm not here to start up a relationship, David. Tim's good company and all but that's all it's gonna be. Besides, I'm not sure bringing in someone new right now is the best thing for either of us." And of course what I meant to say was that bringing in someone new was not the best thing for me. I'm not sure if it would ever be. And after what I went through with James, I was not sure I wanted to even think about putting myself in that position ever again. At this point, I felt things were getting too intense, too personal, and I asked David to give me a second, as I turned around and walked into the kitchen, knocking into someone coming out through the double swiveling doors. "Scuse me." I started and stopped as I looked up into the all too familiar face. And for a minute, I had to remind myself to breathe. "Neil! Are you ok?" His large hand reached out to steady me but I intentionally pulled away, not wanting him to touch me. "I'm fine." I wanted to be anywhere but in here with him but just as I was about to turn around and walk out, David pushed his way in, a smile reaching his face as he saw James. "Da...uh James, it's good to see you. I didn't know you were coming." He pushed gently pass me and rushed into James' open embrace, forgetting for a minute that he wasn't a teenage boy. James sighed and leaned down to kiss his forehead. "Hey kiddo, I'm so happy to see you." For a minute, I seemed to vanish and it was as if they were having some moment that did not include me. I cleared my throat loud enough to break up their embrace and cast my gaze unto David. "Come on David, let's go." "But Dad..." he started and stopped, probably taking serious heed to the expression on my face. "I'll see you around James." "You too kiddo." And we both watched as David doubled back through the kitchen doors and out of sight. When it was clear that David was out of earshot, I opened my mouth to say something but was cut of by James' words. "So are we going to finally talk this out like the adults that we are or are you gonna continue ignoring me?" Comments for this and other stories are encouraged and appreciated and I do reply to all emails. My new email address is juniorj009@gmail.com Thanks for reading. Other stories of mine include: BEGINNINGS December 3rd 2002 YO B Dec 27 2002 heart-and-soul/ INTERACIAL Nov 5 2004 story-of-us/Jan 2 2003 to-sir-with-love/ Dec 27 2002 heart-and-soul/ MILITARY Dec 21 2002 the-recruiter/ RELATIONSHIPS Nov 5 2004 story-of-us/ Jun 6 2005 redemption/ BI RELATIONSHIPS Dec 20 2002 graduation-day/