BDH16

"What's he talking about?" Walid asks me.

I shake my head. Mayorga has come out of nowhere to confront me about killing Qadir. There was only one way he could have found out about it. He found out through the Witchdoctor. I should have known the Witchdoctor was going to cause some more fucking trouble when Walid threatened to come back for a "visit". This must have been that trouble.

"It's complicated," is my answer.

"What?"

Walid gives me a weird look.

Mayorga starts to growl and change back into his wolf.

"Mayorga don't do it..." Walid warns him.

"He KILLED Qadir!" Mayorga repeats.

"DON'T fucking change," Walid commands him.

Mayorga has a madness in his eyes. The fact that he isn't listening to Walid shows just how emotional of a stage he's in at this moment. I get that he's upset. If I knew Mayorga at all I knew that he loved Qadir with all his heart. He would do anything for Qadir. Little did he know that his man was a piece of fucking shit.

Mayorga face ripples, "You don't tell me what to do anymore. You aren't the Alpha anymore. Remember?"

Mayorga changes back into his wolf. Saliva is spitting from his teeth. His is growling and steadily approaching. I think about changing to my wolf as well to defend myself if I need to. I even start taking off my clothes. I think Mayorga catches onto that because all of a sudden Mayorga attacks! He runs straight at me in top speed.

His teeth are chopping, ready to rip me apart. He gets so close that I can feel the hot breath of his wolf inches away from my face. I don't even have time to react to it. I can barely even blink.

Luckily Walid is there.

With his bare hands Walid snatches up Mayorga's wolf and throws him back. I've never seen anything like it. The wolf hits a snow patch in the distance.

"Calm down," Walid warns Mayorga again.

It's useless. Mayorga comes at him again. This time it doesn't end well.

Walid catches the wolf yet again, takes his neck and SNAPS it with his bare hands.

Mayorga lays in the snow and he just dies there. I'm shocked something like this is happening. I'm shocked that Walid was able to kill him with his bare hands, but he warned him. He warned Mayorga over and over to stop. It was useless. Walid is looking at Mayorga right now on the cold road. He looks at his dead body.

Walid is shaking his head. He looks down at that body and then he does something I'd never expected to see Walid do. He starts crying over the fact that he killed Mayorga.

"It wasn't your fault," I tell Walid, "He wasn't going to stop. This isn't your fault at all."

Walid is slow to respond but when he does he turns his red eyes to me.

"No. It's your fault," he tells me.

I'm shocked when Walid says that. The way he is looking at me right now is almost like he doesn't even fucking recognize me. I take a few steps back. I just saw what Walid is capable of doing. He was able to take down a fully transformed werewolf with his bare fucking hands. He was no joke. Walid doesn't approach me in a threatening way. No. It's not physical punishment that I'm scared of right now. It's another sort of punishment. The way that Walid is looking at me right now I would probably prefer if he just grabbed me up like he usually does when I misbehaved.

This was different.

I feign ignorance as best as I can, "What are you talking about?"

"Qadir is dead," he says, "He has to be. He would have never left the pack otherwise. So tell me. Why did Mayorga think that you had something to do with it? You said it was complicated. Simplify it for me."

I'm struggling. I made a deal with Genesis. I was supposed to walk away. At the same time Genesis broke that deal before I did. He sent Mayorga to kill me before I left the Vanderbilt territory. I was so close to leaving freely. I was so close to my happily ever after. The look in Walid's face is far from a happily ever after.

"Baby..."

I pause again.

"WHAT DID YOU DO!"

"I didn't kill Qadir. The thing is that Qadir was working with the Witchdoctor. He wasn't a good guy. He didn't even care about Mayorga. This was all Qadir's fault really. He let the Witchdoctor in. Nasir was never brought to life. The witchdoctor used Nasir's bones to take on his image."

Walid stares at me. It's a cold stare. I can't read what he's thinking. The worst thing in the world is when you are talking to someone you love and you don't know if they are falling out of love with you right at that moment.

He stares back down at Mayorga. His tears have dried. The emotion is still there though.

"You knew. This whole time you knew?"

I nod.

"I made a deal," I explain to him, "With Nasir. I made a deal with Genesis. I just take you away. I know it sounds crazy. I know I shouldn't have done it. I had no choice. The witchdoctor is powerful Walid. There is nothing I could have done. Nothing would have changed things. So I told him. I said I'd take you away. I told him we'd leave. We'd go be happy. Let him have the pack. I want you. That's all I ever wanted..."

There is a cold distant stare he gives me. He doesn't speak for the longest time. He's taking off his clothes. I know what this means. He's going to turn into a wolf. A part of me knows this is going to change everything when he gets naked in the cold.

I stare at his body, worshipping every muscle of Walid like I did a million times. I stare at his strong thighs, his lean abdomen, his bulky chest. I stare at how his tattoos wrap around his body in the sexiest way. I make a mental note of his firm ass and his long, thick dick before he changes into the wolf. I stare wondering if he was going to leave me right here and now.

"You made a deal with the devil."

"I did what I had to do to win you over," I explained to him, "I did what I had to do to keep you."

"Don't you fucking get it? I thought Nasir was back and I STILL chose you. I chose you out of how many boys? You didn't have to win me over. You ALREADY had me. How could you fucking not tell me Nasir wasn't the real Nasir. How could you have NOT told me that?" Walid asks me.

I shake my head. I made a deal with the devil and it was coming back to bite me now. I feel weak in my knees. My legs feel like glue. I'm staring at this man that I love and realizing that I've hurt him in the worst way possible. I find myself on my knees before I know it in front of him. I'm begging. I'm crying. I'm scratching at his legs.

"Please don't leave me..."

I'm finally being completely submissive. Isn't this what Walid always wanted? He wanted a boy to put aside his pride and roll over. Here I was doing exactly that? I was pleading for him to stay with me. I was pleading for him not to leave me.

"Get off me."

Walid take a few steps away from me. He doesn't even let the cold affect him even though it has to be under 0 out here. He just stares out into the distance. He looks down at Mayorga. He blames me for Mayorga's death. Maybe things would have been different if I had told Walid earlier. Maybe he wouldn't have had to kill Mayorga. I didn't know the answer to that. All I know is that Walid doesn't trust me anymore. He doesn't look at me the same.

A part of me wished I let Mayorga kill me. Now that I know what it's like to have had Walid's love...I couldn't imagine living without it.

"Please Walid. I'm sorry. Please..."

"I'm going to burn Mayorga and win my pack back. Don't follow me..." Walid says to me, "Leave Vanderbilt. Don't ever come back. You're not welcome here."

His words are final. I look at him and realize that Walid isn't going to forgive me so easily. What I've done was beyond anything that required forgiveness.

Walid changes into a wolf, throws Mayorga's limp wolf over his coat and takes off into the forest.

I just watch the white wolf until I can't see it any longer.

"You need to get out of bed sometime..."

I'm back in the Pittsburgh territory. My mother is the one who is in my room bothering me. A part of me knows she's disappointed with me over Walid but she doesn't say it. It's been almost a month that Walid has been gone out of my life. Every day for that month I loved him. Every day for that month I missed him. I knew that it was pointless though.

"I'm not in the mood to do anything."

"You used to love to go running. You haven't changed into a wolf in such a long time."

The Pittsburgh woods weren't like the woods in Vanderbilt. They weren't close. I hadn't changed. A part of me just wanted to forget the fact that I was a werewolf.

"I told you mom. I'm not in the mood."

She shakes her head, "You should be more like your brother."

I roll my eyes, "Here you go again."

"Seriously. You both were in the same position. You know what your brother did when Walid didn't choose him to be his Beta? Your brother went and found another Alpha wolf. He's the Beta of the entire Alaska area. He has one of the biggest packs. You can do the same thing. Walid wasn't the only Alpha. The Vanderbilt pack isn't the only werewolf pack."

"Nothing compares," I tell her.

She throws Yuma in my face a lot. He's doing well for himself. Basil who got eliminated early in the competition ended up going on to becoming a powerful Alpha. He always seemed more like an Alpha to me anyway. Yuma ended up becoming the Beta to Basil of the Alaska pack. The last time I saw him I saw that he was happy. He learned to find happiness in the next best thing. I couldn't do that. Nothing compared to the woods of Vanderbilt. Nothing compared to the Vanderbilt Pack. No one compared to Walid. I wasn't going to settle for the next best thing like Yuma did. Besides. Who would want me anyway? I was just a used Beta wolf without a tail.

She shakes her head. I can read the disappointment on her face.

"Well you have a guest."

I sigh.

"I don't want one."

"Fine. I'll just tell Dakota to go away."

Dakota?

"Where is he?"

"Outside in the yard," she explains.

I take a deep breath. It's been a month since I've seen Dakota. I decide that I should at least go over there and meet him. I freshen up. I look like shit. I had to admit it. I haven't been doing much of anything. The depression shows on my face. After spending so long cooped up no amount of water splashed on my face is going to help. I don't have Dakota's makeup team to help me anymore. I can't get glammed up.

So after a few minutes I give up, walk downstairs and walk into the yard. I'm nervous when I get out there. I see Dakota's dirty white wolf sitting on the steps there. It looks over at me when I approach.

Dakota lets me pet him. He lets me play in his fine hairs for a few minutes and give him a tight hug while he's in wolf form. After a few minutes though he changes into a human. He remains sitting there completely naked next to me. We are both just staring at the full moon in the night sky.

"I've missed you," I tell him.

"Yuma said you haven't been doing well..."

"You still talk to Yuma?" I ask him.

Dakota nods, "We're still good friends. Nothing more than that. I couldn't lead him on knowing that I was in love with you. There was nothing to work out. Yuma understood it after a while. He's happy now as you can see."

"Do you regret it?"

"What?"

"Not choosing Yuma. It would have been so easy."

Dakota shrugs and laughs, "Do you regret not choosing me instead of Walid? It would have been so easy."

"Is that why you're here. To throw it in my face that Walid and I didn't work out?"

"No. Not at all. I couldn't come see you," Dakota states, "I'm sorry. I have been just clearing my mind over everything that happened in Vanderbilt. I spent a lot of time running those woods, living off the land and hunting like a true wolf."

"Walid..."

"I've seen him up there. I ran into him. He told me about what happened."

I shake my head.

"It was my fault."

Dakota doesn't disagree with me. I never thought that he would bullshit me into believing something that wasn't true just to save my feelings. I think he knew that I could have handled that situation better. The way I handled the situation cost me Walid in the long run.

"The pain goes away," he explains, "I promise you that much. It goes away. Sooner or later everything stops and you move on."

I wonder if he is talking about me moving on from Walid or the fact that he's moved on from me. I don't want to think about either one of those honestly. I guess I'm being selfish. I just sit there and take a few deep breaths allowing myself to really feel the cold breeze of the night before speaking again.

When I speak again I have a mission. I need to know what happened to Walid.

"What happened to him?"

I don't have to say who. Dakota knows I'm talking about Walid.

"He's up on that mountain. They call him the lone wolf now."

"Where is the pack?"

Dakota shrugs, "No one knows. He returned to Vanderbilt Castle and his pack was gone. Nasir took them. God knows what a power hungry witch doctor is going to do with a pack of werewolves."

"Actually...I do."

"What?"

"He mentioned something about a place named Eden. I think he wants to take it over. I think he needs the wolves."

"Eden. The vampire city?"

He nods, "Yes. That's the one."

"You should tell Walid."

"We both know he wants nothing to do with me," I explain, "He'd never speak to me."

Dakota shakes his head.

"Well then. That's his loss."

He pats me on my back at that moment. He does it slow in the most caring way. I don't know what comes over me at that moment. Maybe it's the warm air. Maybe it's how lonely I've been feeling. I just start kissing Dakota.

Dakota kisses me back. There is all that passion that we used to have reunited at that moment. My tongue is down his throat. Dakota holds onto it, catches it and caresses it.

He's already naked and before I know it we are rolling around in the dirt in my backyard. I'm ripping off my clothes and mounting on top of Dakota. Dakota's naked firm body lies underneath me looking up.

"Wait...wait we should stop...." he says.

"No. Give it to me."

"Yas..."

I ignore him. I mount on top of his hard dick. His mouth may have been wanting me to stop but his body was saying something else. His dick goes straight into me. It's already lubricated from his precum. I feel his dick fill my warm insides. I feel my body get tense as I struggle to get used to the penetrating cock in my walls. His dick throbs a few time, releasing warm precum into my whole as though knowing that I needed just a little bit more lube.

Dakota roles his head back. He spreads out his arms. I put my hands down on his muscular chest. He's always been there. He's always been there for me when I needed him. Right now I needed Dakota more than anything.

"Damn this feels so good..." he finally gives in.

I rock back and forth on his meat. I let my ass cheeks bounce up against his pelvis area in a rhythmic motion. All the while Dakota is humping upwards making sure that every piece of him is inserted inside of me. We roll around in the mud until he is on top of me. The dirt doesn't matter. He long strokes me making sure that it's the right amount of passion and the right amount of pain.

I take deep, solid breaths. I'm holding on for dear life when I turn and let him fuck me doggy style. He hits it from the back like a true wolf.

After a few minutes of hard thrusts, he's panting, "It's so tight."

"I love you Dakota."

I don't expect it to come out. I don't know why I say it. Maybe it's true. Maybe deep down inside I've always known that my love for Dakota is powerful. Having sex with him now as he fucks me doggy style just intensifies it all.

Dakota grunts a thick, "I love you too. I'm cumming."

He doesn't pull out. He delivers me his thick wet nut. He gives me every last drop of it and when he cums he collapses on top of my back. He breathes heavy in my ear. Slowly he pulls out and lays on the ground next to me. The full moon in the sky beams down on us.

I smile.

"It can be like this forever. You know?" I tell him, "You and me. We can go be wolves together. Run around naked. We can fuck. We don't need a pack. I don't need an Alpha. It can just be you and me."

"That's a nice idea isn't it?" he asks.

"Yeah it is."

That's when he shakes his head.

"We can't do it though."

I'm so confused. I thought we were really coming to an understanding here. Dakota doesn't seem to look at it that way. He sits up and cuffs his legs. He looks down on me. His tall slim build is perfectly balled up under the moonlight.

"Why do you say that?" I ask him, resting my hands under my head to get a better look at him.

"What we just did...it's something that I wanted forever. I couldn't pass it up. I couldn't resist no matter how much I wanted to. I had to do that with you at least one time."

"Why would you want to resist?"

"Because you aren't mine."

I shake my head, "Dakota..."

"You love Walid. You want to belong to him."

I roll my eyes.

"Don't you get it? Walid wants nothing to do with me."

"Maybe. But don't give up."

"You're giving up on me," I suggest.

Dakota shakes his head, "That's not the case at all. I'm doing this because I love you. I'm telling you not to give up on him because I know that's where you heart is and I want you to be happy no matter what."

Dakota had a point. I loved Walid. I loved Dakota but Walid and I always had that connection. The fact that I had hurt Walid in the way I did made it impossible to go back to him though.

"He's concerned with his missing pack."

"That's where we come in."

"What?"

"Pack your things."

"Why?"

"We're going to go find his pack. We're going to go make things right," Dakota tells me, "I'm going to help you win back the love of your life."

I look at Dakota trying to figure him out. Here was a guy that was in love with me telling me that he wanted to help me get back with someone else. It was the strangest concept in the world and I didn't get it.

"It's impossible. We don't even know exactly where it is. Besides it's dangerous."

"Witchdoctors. Vampires. I think werewolves would fit right in," Dakota adds with a smile.

"You confuse me Dakota," I explain, "Why would you want to lose me by helping me again by helping me gain back Walid's trust?"

"Remember what I told you in Vanderbilt forest that night we ran out on the run. About what you father told me."

"About the moon?"

"Yeah. Sometimes I'd lose myself and your father would say all I had to do was howl at the moon. And he'd know where I was. He'd come find me. Because the moon gives werewolves power. You are lost right now. And I'm going to be your moon. I'm going to help you through this. Right now Walid is where your heart is. You know that."

I can't lie.

"Yeah," I say.

"Well then that's the plan. We'll go fix things. Don't think for a minute though I'm not going to fight to win your heart away from Walid every step of the way."

Dakota smiles over at me. He is right about one thing. It would have been so easy to just choose him. It would have been as easy as it was for him to have chosen Yuma. Things didn't happen like that. Dakota was in love with me and I was in love with Walid. That's how things were. I knew that Dakota wasn't going to leave my side though.

Together we both change into wolves. We stare up at the moon. He'd run with me anywhere. Dakota would follow me anywhere...even into hell.

I didn't know what the plan was. I didn't know what happened next. Maybe I never find Walid's pack. Maybe Walid never forgives me. Maybe I do end up just using this time to bond with Dakota and I realize the person who I need to be with was with me all along. I don't know the what's next but I know as I look up at that moon that I felt more powerful than I'd ever felt before.

With so many things unclear as I looked at my journey this far I feel proud of how far I've gone.

Overall one thing was clear: I was no longer the Beta werewolf.

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