Date: Mon, 28 Jan 2008 16:54:31 -0800 (PST)
From: Journeyman Harper <journeymanharper@yahoo.com>
Subject: Development (gay male/sci-fi fantasy)

                         Development
                    By Journeyman Harper

This story is a flashback to a prequel. If you are reading
this for the first time, it will make more sense if you
ready the baseline story, "Legacy" first. If you decide to
skip that, and dive in here you will find a self-contained
work inside the lead-in and lead-out text. Many thanks to
those who kept asking for the prequel.

Star Trek, Deep Space Nine, etc. are all property of
Paramount Studios. All other characters are works of fiction
and bear no resemblance to anyone whatsoever, etc.

Welcome to Development!

***

Kerryn and Jacen lay in each other's arms, panting. It had
been especially good today. It was Jacen's seventeenth
birthday, and they had been together now as lovers and
partners for a year.

The mental link during their sex was never stronger, and
Jacen relished being so enclosed and protected. It was the
answer to all the loneliness he had always experienced. He
was himself, that was true, but he could always come back to
the one who would protect him, support him and love him.
That knowledge filled him with profound and deep joy.

Kerryn could feel the good feelings radiate from Jacen. A
flicker echoed through his mind that he had never had that
kind of security from another person. He had always been on
the edge. Not adventurous, but independent, and usually with
others depending upon him. The long years of being the only
reliable supplier of cargo through the Aurigaen Belt had
been formative, that way. That civilization had depended
upon him and his father.

Jacen felt the wandering of his lover's mind, somehow, and
realized that he still didn't know very much about the
Kerryn before they met, especially well before. Wesley
Crusher had told him some things, but some were also second
hand, or rumor. He felt suddenly a burning curiosity to
know.

"Kerryn?"

"Mmm?"

Jacen grinned. Kerryn was tired. "You old men tire so
easily."

"Ha. Someday I'll tell you about Zink." Now where did that
come from?

Jacen pounced on the opportunity. "Zink? I think I hear a
story I'd like to hear." He shifted slightly, and he felt
Kerryn's cock nestle back against his butt. Jacen loved the
intimacy. "I know so little about you before."

"I've given you the highlights."

"Yes, but I want to know more." He then took a daring
chance. "I don't suppose you could remember it into my
head?"

Kerryn was startled. "I've never thought of that. Reliving a
memory into someone else? It might take a while."

"We've got all night."

Kerryn grinned. "You really want this?" He reached over and
stroked Jacen's cock gently, sensually. "More than that?"

Jacen took a deep breath. Kerryn was such an incredible
lover. But his thirst for knowledge deepened. How did he
learn it all? "For now, yes. I want to know it all, Kerryn."

"All right." Kerryn sighed. Jacen had no idea what he was
going in for.

Naked and spooning, Kerryn snuggled as close as he could to
Jacen, their bodies fitting perfectly together. Shoulders
wrapped in arms, arms across chest, heads together on the
pillow, Kerryn slipped into Jacen's facile mind and searched
back in his own memories. Surprisingly, they were there, and
as he opened his mental eyes back to his earliest
recollections, he felt and heard Jacen gasp in awareness.
And the tapestry of Kerryn's life began to unfold.

***

He cried. It had been a week since she had left. She had
explained it carefully to him, her mental touch soft and
reassuring, yet sad at the same time. She loved him, and he
loved her, and they had shared that last mental exchange
before she left. Even now, he understood that it made her
feel so trapped and closed in on their home ship. But he
missed her. And his father was very sad too.

Little Kerryn was five Earth years old. It was his birthday.
It flashed through him that it was mean for her to leave
just before his birthday, but somehow he understood that she
had to. He had been able to help his mother through the
worst of it, sharing with her the memories of her homeworld
and the open air and skies that he someday might see. But it
had gotten harder and harder.

There was a big word for it. Claustrophobia. It was a word
that meant, to little Kerryn, that people got very scared in
small places. He loved small places, and could be found at
times hiding inside the smallest nook or cranny of their
ship. But when you are a freighter family, nearly all your
time is spent in space and in the closed-in confines of your
ship.

Doryn had joined his Betazoid wife seven years ago. Analee
Fori was a full Betazoid who, feeling the confines of the
Betazoid society had broken free and gone out as a trader's
assistant. She had met Doryn on Delvin Six, the Freighter's
Guild home planet during one of his brief stopovers. After
meeting to negotiate cargo, she had been caught off guard by
Doryn's sparkling eyes and easy manner. Her grin had gotten
her fired by her trader, and Doryn had felt so badly that
the he took her out to dinner. A brief courtship followed,
and the next time Doryn visited Delvin Six, she left with
him.

They had never formally married. Somehow, neither was quite
ready to take that ultimate step but they each were totally
devoted to each other. Doryn painted the walls to minimize
the closed-in effects of the ship, and for a while they were
happy.

Then, little Kerryn was born. With quite a normal birth on
Delvin Six, he spent the first couple months on the planet
with his mother. When he was able to walk, and had begun
talking in his often strident voice, they had embraced him
and decided that it was time to resume their shipboard life
style.

That transition did not go well. For one thing, Analee began
to suffer the closed-in paranoia of claustrophobia again.
Controllable, but anxious. Doryn became worried when she did
not adapt back to the lifestyle. But more prevalent than
that, little Kerryn screamed through his Terrible Twos,
laughed and shrieked with joy through the threes, tried to
dominate the universe in the Formidable Fours, and in
general was loud, busy and a physical and emotional drain on
his parents. Being in space, there were no nannies, very few
play dates, and no one he could really call a friend. And
that meant no relief for the parents.

So, here he was on his fifth birthday. His father was trying
to be cheerful, but Kerryn was half Betazoid and he could
already see through people's bluffs. So after some cake, and
a neat holographic target game, he decided to try talking to
his father.

"Daddy, will we ever see mommy again?"

Doryn felt the absence flood him. What could he say? "Little
Kerryn, I don't know. Maybe someday we can take the long
trip and visit Betazed where she lives. Or maybe she will
come visit us."

The little boy nodded. "I guess we will have to wait and
see, right?"

"That's right."

"Well, I'll do just what she used to do so that the ship and
you won't miss her."

Doryn regarded his little boy with pride. "That would be a
big help."

They each went out of their way for each other to cover the
gap left by Analee. Doryn knew it was unlikely she would
return. But just the same, he could not let the idea wither
away so fast. But it was not mentioned between them again
for a very long time.

Kerryn fundamentally changed that day. It was as if years of
idle childhood were washed away on a sandy beach. Sure, he
played with his toys, but he spent more time watching his
father. With no other guardian, he spent more time with his
father when Doryn negotiated deals, loaded and unloaded the
cargo, and went about the general business of a freighter
pilot.

For extended appointments, most starbases and freighter
exchange facilities had child-care play centers. Kerryn met
Illiar at one such location when he was seven. With only one
parent, and many exchange points to visit Kerryn was very
likely to see the same cluster of children occasionally. He
had seen Illiar before but never really met him. This time,
though the children were playing space ship and both Kerryn
and Illiar wanted to be captain.

They stood in the middle of their group, eyeing each other
closely as only children can do. Kerryn, being seven and
slightly younger, spoke first.

"I think I should be captain."

Illiar frowned. "Why you? It's my turn."

"I wasn't here yesterday. I get credit for being new today."

"Then you don't know our rules. That means you can't be
captain."

The adults watched in amused amazement as the two boys
negotiated for position. Finally, after everything from
strength, height, voice, experience, and number of planets
visited was exchanged, Kerryn rolled his eyes.

"All right, you can be captain if I can be Admiral."

Illiar fell for it. "Deal." He paused. "What's an Admiral?"

"The one who gives the captain the orders."

Illiar sighed. "All right." He straightened. "My name is
Illiar."

"I'm Kerryn. You were tough."

"So were you."

On that basis the friendship started. The strengths of the
two boys were obvious. Illiar was a charmer. His winsome
smile, his magical presence and his enthusiasm were a
positive flow throughout whoever was near by. Kerryn was
competent, stable, and almost obsessive with detail. Once he
got wrapped up in a project, he would not deviate from it
until either it was completed or it exploded. The latter
more often happened in play when the group would tire of the
same game.

Such an explosion took place during one of the visits when
Illiar was there with Kerryn. They were building a structure
with interlocking blocks, and Kerryn insisted over and over
on a proper foundation. It took an hour longer, and most of
the children were bored because their fortress wasn't done
for play yet. Finally, Illiar had to say something.

"Kerryn, forget about the bottom. We need the rest of it.
Everyone is tired of building rows."

"But it has to be done, otherwise it won't stay up. It's
only a few more-"

"That's what you said the last few times."

Kerryn dug in. "It won't stay up if we don't."

"No one will want to play if we do."

They stared at each other. And then Kerryn burst out, "Fine.
Go play. I'll finish this alone and then we can all use it."

The other kids went off to other things. Kerryn went back to
his rows. Illiar stood there, and then followed the group.
Kerryn finished another set of rows, and then the tears
flowed. Silently. Why did he have to do this? Couldn't he
just let it go? But then, it wouldn't be done right and it
would fall down. He put another row on. Eighteen more and he
would be done. The others were laughing, maybe at him, maybe
not. Was it fair for them to play and he to do this alone?
Inside him, it said yes, because that was what he said he
would do. Resolution surprising for one his age bloomed
through him. Whatever it took, even if he died a miserable,
horrible, lonely death from being crushed by these
interlocking blocks, this toy structure would be finished.
So there!

He looked up and saw Illiar standing next to him. He knew
Illiar could see the tears on his face. Defiantly, he said,
"It won't stay up if we don't do it right."

"It's OK." And Illiar started to lay on another row.

The teachers watched the entire exchange, and Doryn was
informed that Kerryn was ready for the Educational Program,
even though it was two years early.

Two weeks later, Kerryn was fully immersed in the
Educational Program Unit, or EPU. The EPU was a guided
tutorial system with student monitoring and feedback. It
would pace the student at the right pace, and could
recognize signs of boredom or distraction. Reports on
progress were sent both to the parents as well as to the
Freighter Guild, which was truly a pseudo-nation in its care
of its members.

The EPU fascinated Kerryn. He got the hang of the controls
quickly, and Doryn set aside an entire cabin for it with
lots of table space and materials. He then imparted the most
valuable information that Kerryn would ever learn.

"Neatness enables everything. You should use and keep this
room neat and organized. Things get dirty, and can get
cleaned up, and that's OK. Dirt happens. But mess, clutter,
piles of stuff, disorganization, there is no room for that
on a ship. It doesn't have to be attractive, either. But it
does have to be organized." And Doryn showed his son both by
example and by instruction how important it truly was.

"Thanks, Dad."

Doryn regarded his almost nine-year-old son with pride.
"Kerryn, from now on as well I want you with me when we
negotiate. You will need that too."

Kerryn grinned. "I've done pretty well so far."

"We'll see."

The trip through the Aurigaen Belt was upon them. This was
the longest string of short exchanges, and it would be four
months before they emerged. Kerryn saw an opportunity and
decided to snag it.

"Anyway, father, the EPU is very happy with me."

Doryn could smell a rat. "Yes, it has reported your
excellent progress."

"Well, it is customary for work well done to receive
compensation."

"True. Your customary compensation is room, board, and care
on this ship."

"Agreed, but that is more your obligation than compensation.
I am your blood descendant and responsibility until age
sixteen."

Doryn couldn't fault that. "I will concede that, although
you do have more than obligatory accommodations here under
my purview."

"So then, beyond my personal motivation, I have no incentive
to excel at the EPU?"

Doryn chuckled. "Big words!"

"Chalk it up to the EPU. Point, though?"

Doryn knew he was cornered. "Conceded. What did you have in
mind?"

Kerryn took a deep breath. "Access to the subspace nets. I
want to talk with my friends."

"Subspace costs money."

"Isn't proper socialization part of my obligatory
upbringing?"

"Now you are on two tracks!" Doryn grinned. "Never do that.
You are faulting me on lack of socialization as well as
justifying the cost as a reward for good progress."

"You are changing the subject." Kerryn knew that one cold.

They stood, and Doryn tried his playful tactic. "What were
we talking about?"

An opportunity! "You were granting me access to the subspace
nets at no cost."

"NO COST?!!"

Kerryn grinned.

Doryn clapped his hands. He was good. "What will you do to
offset the cost of the subspace access, should I grant it?"

Kerryn took a long breath. "I would think about any options
you would have."

Doryn nodded slowly. "Here are my terms. I want you to
optimize ship performance. We lose money hiring engineers to
tune the ship systems. You do the maintenance and repair,
and the difference I will allocate to the cost of the
subspace nets."

Kerryn's face fell. "That will take some time to accrue
before I can get on the nets."

"Deal?"

Kerryn sighed. It was a good deal. "Deal."

"Good. Now, as a reward for excellent performance, I will
give you the cost of a year's unlimited access to the
subspace nets."

Suspicious. "A year on what planet?"

Doryn chuckled. "An Earth year."

Doryn was not ready for what happened next. Kerryn leaped
onto his father in a huge hug. "Thanks so much, Dad!"
Neither of them were demonstrative under normal
circumstances, but this moment spanned many years of much-
needed family interaction. And so Kerryn joined the spread-
out community of his friends.

That community became his lifeline. When Kerryn turned
twelve, he had completed the EPU, four years ahead of
schedule. Doryn then updated the unit for the Basic
Navigation and Operations program, and Kerryn was introduced
into the virtual world of piloting small one-seat ships.

His first flight was memorable. After completing all the
theory for flight, he sat in the simulation chair, and
studied the controls. A Level One cockpit had a flight
stick, thrust and counter-thrust, and navigation displays.
He sat, wiggled the stick, played with the buttons, and then
started the simulation. The instructions gave him all lights
green, and he gave some thrust which blasted him off and
immediately into a bulkhead, crashing. Less than two
seconds.

But he got better. Within three weeks he was doing
acrobatics, could land and launch flawlessly, and could
execute maneuvers that sent his father to the toilet. He
continued the EPU program, and flight training until as a
single pilot there wasn't a ship he couldn't fly. The Level
Two cockpit added additional controls, warp drive, shields
and phasers. Kerryn played war games with the simulated
dogfights, and eventually coordination of squads.

At age thirteen, he hit Level Three. Level Three added two
key features to the program: command of a small crew on a
larger ship, and subspace networking to other players. The
simulators were not sophisticated like a holodeck would be,
but audio cues and verbal commands were used to guide and
control the ships. Kerryn practiced and practiced and
practiced with his four-person crew until one day an
invitation appeared on his subspace link.

Dear Simulator Pilot:

We are organizing an exercise for the Flight participants
and would like you to participate. If interested, please
submit your evaluation record for consideration and
placement.

Regards,

Commander, Freighter Guild Pre-Flight School

"DAD!!!"

Doryn entered the classroom. "Something going on?"

"Look at this!" Kerryn showed his father the message. "Any
idea what this is about?"

Doryn knew. As a child, his best friend had gotten one.
"Kerryn, that is a very rare ticket into flight school. Very
few kids get them." He grinned widely, and explained that
the school conducted a subspace-networked exercise among the
selected pilots in their simulators as a pre-qualifying run
for Flight School. "If you get in, and perform as
advertised, you get invited to Flight School! I'm so proud
of you, Kerryn!"

Together they signaled acknowledgement, and the evaluation
profile was sent. Kerryn waited anxiously for a few days for
a response, but these things are slow to act. Illiar had
been invited too, and that just fueled their excitement.

Kerryn and Illiar had been in almost daily contact now that
he had subspace access. Illiar's parents were wealthy, and
had a much larger and more modern vessel than the Totentanz.
Both were well respected in the Guild. Once in a while the
two vessels would cross paths, and nearly always they would
stop together for a few hours of camaraderie. They were
growing, although Illiar was nowhere near as far along on
the EPU as Kerryn was.

He finished up the advanced EPU program, and then one day en
route when he was working on the warp drive it started
dumping diagnostics on him. The problem was, they were all
in Romulan. The Totentanz used a modified Romulan warp core
for propulsion, and while the main parts of the core used
Interlac to communicate, the diagnostics were still in
Romulan. Kerryn started swearing, and called up to the Nav
deck.

"Dad, I'm back here in Propulsion. We've got a problem."

"Oh?"

"We're going to have half efficiency on the warp core. There
are diagnostics everywhere but they are all in Romulan. Do
you know any Romulan?"

"Only a few fragments. Keep an eye on it, but we'll get a
tech at the next starbase to look at it."

A few moments, then, "I'm sorry."

Doryn laughed. "Not your fault."

Later, on impulse, Kerryn connected the EPU to subspace and
tried to search for a module on languages. Romulan drive
systems were popular in the Guild, and as a result he found
several modules on conversational Romulan language, formal
High Romulan and Technical Romulan. Downloading all three,
Kerryn dug into language as his next course of study.

He told Illiar about it, but Illiar shrugged. "What good is
Romulan if no one else speaks it?"

Kerryn grinned. "Just imagine if you and I could."

Illiar laughed. "Well, we could confuse our parents, that's
for sure. Speaking of which, when are you coming out of the
Belt?"

"Three weeks. What's up?"

"Mom and Dad want to invite you to stay with us on one of
the short cargo runs for a sleep-over."

"ILLIAR! That would be so cool! I'll have to ask Dad."

"Sure, but let the parents set it up. You know how they
are."

Kerryn nodded, and they signed off.

Their acceptance for the simulation came the next day. Both
were to be members of a squad of four single-seat ships that
would be asked to go through some maneuvers. There would be
eight sessions, and the ratings would be released after all
sessions were complete. Both Kerryn and Illiar checked their
simulator configurations, and while Illiar was comfortably
equipped, Kerryn's just scraped by. He hoped that they would
take that into account.

Kerryn figured out how to link his simulator to Illiar's and
they began some practice together over the subspace link.
Kerryn found that his friend tended to overcorrect a bit.
Illiar did not complain about his flying, so he guessed it
was OK. It was key to the underlying philosophy that Kerryn
had always adhered to: do it right.

With so much time on the Totentanz, and his regular exercise
of running the decks alternating with the EPU, Kerryn
absorbed much more schooling than just about any other kid
his age. He loved it, though, and the subspace chats with
several of his friends provided the right balance. He hoped
they got in to Flight School. That would at least bring them
all together in the same place for a while.

The warp core acted up again, but this time Kerryn had
enough Romulan to be able to understand the problem. It
always came back to flow regulators and relays. He became
adept at switching them, and when the tech did come to
service the engines (Doryn was no engineer) Kerryn watched
and learned, fascinated.

The night before the flight exercise, he and his father had
dinner together. Doryn had realized that he had less and
less contact with Kerryn, but dinner slipped into their
regular and familiar ways. It was then that Doryn had some
news for him.

"Kerryn, you are now thirteen years old. We have one more
week in the Belt, and then we're going to take a break.
Illiar's parents have asked for a sleep-over, and we've
agreed on four days on their ship, a rendez-vous at Starbase
290, and then four days on Totentanz. How does that sound to
you?"

"ABSOLUTELY AWESOME!! Thanks, Dad!" Kerryn could hardly sit
still. "Will we have cargo?"

"Yes, we have an easy run to Mobius. I'm actually going to
take Totentanz in at Starbase 290 for a systems overhaul and
do some guard duty on Invincible. I'm up for my rotation."

"Cool! What're we getting?"

"Upgraded subspace and a simulator upgrade for you. A new
navigation computer, and some hull skin."

"Can we afford all that?"

Doryn nodded. "Yes. I am also getting you the complete
Starfleet EPU sequence."

Kerryn's jaw dropped. "Starfleet?"

"It's everyone's dream, Kerryn, to go live in a world with
no money and the best technology. You are about to hit the
age limit in the Guild EPUs. May as well glean what you can
from Starfleet."

"Dad, you are amazing."

"One other thing. Have you finished the Guild Ship
Operations sequence?"

"Yes, last week."

"Good. You now have duty shifts starting today. Mostly when
I am too tired, but at least a couple of hours a day and on
demand."

"Wow, Dad! Thanks!"

Kerryn was so charged that night he barely slept. Doryn
looked in on him once. The little boy he knew was growing up
fast. He already had longer hair than Doryn liked, but oh
well. And he was in great shape. A little experience and he
would be quite the lady killer. All the more reason to get
him trained and confident now.

Morning came, and the launch of the exercise. Kerryn and
Illiar were in different squads. No names were allowed, but
each was designated with a color and a number. Kerryn was
Gold Four. He later found out that Illiar had been Blue One.

The first run was all straight maneuvers. They had to form
different patterns - diamonds, lines, diagonals, and more,
and hold them through turns and loops. Trivial stuff.
Commands came from the simulator itself, which was
identified as Gold Zero.

The second sequence involved pairs. Again, Gold Zero gave
commands and Gold Three and Four paired against One and Two.
More maneuvers. The third sequence added three other squads
for a group of sixteen.

The fourth sequence was a race. Everyone had to chase down a
target and get a tractor lock on it. The trick was, the
target was fast and smart, so all those who blasted their
fuel away in the beginning ran out of power at the end.
Kerryn and a few others had an eye for conservatism, so they
held out longer. But by some good celestial navigation,
Kerryn was able to slingshot around a white dwarf star and
gain enough momentum and a lucky intercept course that he
was able to get a tractor lock on the target.

Sequence five was in groups of eight. The difference was
that a student was a group leader. Most of the candidates
had trouble with this, but since Kerryn had been through
Guild Flight Operations on the EPU, he could plan and
achieve the objective. Hence, when it was his turn to
command, things went smoothly and predictably. Gold Two was
a terrible leader, but One and Three were OK.

Sequences six and seven were in groups of sixteen, with
command rotating among several of the different students,
and complicated objectives. No one, not even Kerryn met all
the objectives for the exercise. But Kerryn met as many as
than anyone else in his group for these sequences.

It was sequence eight that scared Kerryn. Rather than orders
being displayed and time allowed for planning, a scenario
outlay came out. They were all a part of a virtual ship,
operating in different departments. All thirty two
participants were involved. And when the screen showed the
crew assignments, he found Illiar first as Operations
Officer. Kerryn's assignment: Captain.

"Oh shit." That echoed among the muttering. But he knew
Illiar heard it.

The simulation began, and there were no objectives visible.
What were they supposed to do? A moment's panic washed
through him. He was not ready for this. Sure, simulations
were one thing, but he had a whole crew of live people now.
That was different. He froze a bit.

Amid the muttering, he heard Illiar call out humorously,
"Captain On the Bridge." That brought a round of nervous
laugher, and it shocked him into the realization that that
meant him. The engineering curiosity took hold, and he
wondered what kind of ship they were on, anyway?

 "Welcome aboard whatever we are on." After that, Kerryn's
first command was a full ship status assessment, and that
apparently was right because there were problems in the warp
core that got fixed, misalignments in the sensors, and a
variance in shields. He prioritized them, and as the
attention was given by his virtual crew, the problems went
away. Within thirty simulation minutes, they were in best
form. He organized on-shifts and off-shifts in two-hour
intervals.

Hmm. He checked cargo manifests, found that his ship was
empty and there was cargo waiting for him at the starbase.
Without fixing the warp core, they would never have made it.
As it was, he hit Warp Five to get there. Cargo was volatile
in atmosphere, so the cargo bay was depressurized and in the
process a pump went bad. But they had fixed the backup
earlier, so all was well. The rest of the simulation was
spent delivering the cargo, and running routine diagnostics.

After that, many of the crew relaxed. But Kerryn, being
frugal even in simulation, undocked and moved out to a high-
altitude orbit so as not to be charged docking fees. This
proved fortuitous, as plague was brought aboard the station
after their departure and it would have killed half the crew
and caused financial disaster. This was obviously a test on
many levels.

Six hours they had been in the simulators. Kerryn realized
there was another test here as he rubbed his eyes in
fatigue, and gave the conn to his first officer with
instructions. The moment he did this, his display went
blank. No results showed up and the simulator was clearly
running, so he assumed he must be asleep. He knew there was
an audible wake-up alarm, so he did lean back and close his
eyes for a bit.

His simulator gave him a loud alert, and the display started
counting down from 20. At zero, it came full up and Kerryn
swore. His first officer got them into an asteroid field and
they were being pummeled. Taking command, he immediately
slowed out of warp, gave full power to the shields and
looked at the log. They had taken on a cargo of antimatter.
Antimatter in an asteroid field was like the twentieth-
century analogy of tap-dancing in a mine field. They were
probably goners. He let loose a verbal stream of swearing in
Romulan, and surveyed the field.

There was a path out if you went upwards. Flinging commands
at his Navigation officer, they swung up only to have their
starboard warp nacelle slammed by an asteroid. Fortunately,
it broke cleanly away and on a different trajectory, so that
when it did detonate and spew plasma everywhere, they were
away. Five minutes later they cleared the field, and limped
towards the nearest starbase.

Ship's damage was severe. It would be weeks before they
reached a starbase. They had no communications other than
short range. They needed help, as they were essentially in a
space coffin. The warp core was shot, they were on ship
sustain only, and would exhaust their resources. There was
only one thing to do.

"Cargo, this is the captain."

"Roger."

"Release the cargo into space. Helm, move us to a safe
distance."

A minute, then, "Captain, cargo is released and is now at
one million kilometers."

"Tactical, target the cargo and fire phasers."

"Sir? That will destroy the cargo."

"Yes, it will. An explosion that big will surely have an
someone here within hours instead of us starving to death
over weeks."

The explosion was tremendous. The shock wave sent them
reeling several million kilometers, but the explosion would
be noted and a ship would be dispatched.

Within one minute of the explosion, the screens went blank
and read that the simulation was over. Exhausted and stiff,
he disengaged himself and made his pit stop and then went to
see his father.

Doryn was appalled at how Kerryn looked. "My god, Kerryn,
how did it go?"

"Lousy, I think. At the end, we had no warp, were missing
one nacelle, on batteries, no communications, and we
phasered the cargo to create a call for help." He related
the details.

"Sounds like the captain did the best he could. Where were
you in the crew?"

"I was the captain."

Doryn was amazed. "Wow! Son, you made all the right
decisions. Captain! That is terrific! How many crew were
there? Will they give a debrief?"

"Ratings come out tomorrow at 1400 ships time. Including
myself, thirty-two."

Doryn let him finish his soup. "Go to bed, Kerryn. Hell, I
haven't dealt with that much on even my hardest trip."

"Thanks, Dad." And as he stumbled wearily to bed, he saw
that Illiar had been trying to get a hold of him. He sent
him a quick message that he was going to sleep, and then he
did just that.

Two hours before the debrief, Illiar and Kerryn were
exchanging experiences.

"So Illiar, honestly, how did I do? You were two tiers below
me. What was it like?"

"It was both cool and scary. You were calm, knew what to do,
and that we found so many problems means that they set us
up. When you went off duty, the first officer was Red One.
He was an ass. He kept ordering people around for status
reports. That asteroid field was on the charts, and
Navigation missed it. Red One's last words were, Oh crap,
what do I do, and I called out, Summon the Captain to the
bridge, damn it. After that, the sim connected you back in
and man you were good. We could tell you were swearing, but
no one knew what it was. Most of us who live on ships knew
what you did with the cargo, but the landlubbers had no
clue. How did you like the questionnaire?"

"What questionnaire? When it disconnected me, it just
reported the debrief time and cut me out."

"Crap. The rest of us had to rate all the departments, and
what was going on."

"Well, it's done. I guess we'll hear at 1400."

"1500, Kerryn."

"Mine says 1400. Guess they want to crucify the captain
personally. My Dad is also invited to attend."

"That means it is on comms instead of sim. Good luck."

"Thanks. Totentanz out." And Kerryn leaned back. Red One had
fucked it up for them. Oh well. He got dressed, ate, and
fidgeted a little. Maybe his Dad would know.

"Dad?"

"Hmm?"

"What should I wear to a court-martial?"

Doryn dropped his fork. "Why do you say that?"

"Well, under my command, my ship got trashed and my cargo
blown to bits. My Number One blew it, but I am the captain."

Doryn thought. "Try grey or black, solid, nothing flashy.
You don't have a uniform, but try to be as formal as you
can."

"OK. Thanks."

"Kerryn, relax. It was an exercise."

"It was just so real, Dad. I tried to do everything right.
And it went nova."

"See what they say. There is always room for improvement."

And so, at 1400 hours, they sat down in front of the comm
station. It activated, and a panel of nine men and women sat
there. Upon first viewing, their eyebrows raised.

"Well, captain, welcome to your debrief. Before we begin,
just how old are you?"

"Sirs, I am thirteen years old."

Murmurs. Then the leader said. "Thank you. Please describe
your mission history."

Kerryn did, noting the problems, impacts, and fixes, his
duty shift off, and his reinsertion into a ship bent on
destruction, their extraction, and finally the detonation of
the cargo.

"Anything to add, captain?"

Kerryn thought. "No, I don't think so, sirs. But please ask
if you have questions."

One spoke up. "Why specifically did you detonate the cargo?"

"We had no long-term power. Our warp core was shot. We were
missing a nacelle. Our communication system was fused solid.
We were a floating space coffin. Detonating that much
antimatter caused a ninth order power wave to be generated,
and would certainly capture the interest of the Guild, if
not Starfleet itself. It was a distress flare, although on a
large scale."

"You could have waited."

"Perhaps. But if we had kept the cargo intact, but killed
off all the crew, how does that solve the problem?"
Nervously, to himself he added, what is the going price on
human life, especially thirty two of them?

They nodded. "A sound argument."

The leader spoke. "Here now is our debrief of the
simulation. We were able to find only one fault in your
handling of this scenario. You did not pull up a
qualifications profile on your key officers. That
information would have shown you his lack of capability."

Kerryn's eyebrows furrowed. "Sirs, I do not recall on my
simulator seeing the option for officer profiles."

Some muttering, and a look at a list, and the leader
grinned. "You are using a PK-series simulator?"

"AN/PJ-32, sir. It predates the PK-series."

"Comment withdrawn. We are very pleased with your handling
of this scenario. Your rating will be listed at the full
team debrief. And get yourself a newer simulator. The PJ
series is antique."

"Thank you, sirs."

The communications unit closed. Doryn grinned. "See? You
must have been amazing."

The full debrief came later. That was truly amazing. Team
One did not detect any problems with the ship and never made
it to the starbase to get cargo. They didn't even check the
manifests or schedules. Team Two made it to starbase, but
caught the plague and as a result had a mutiny.

The leader of the panel spoke. "Team Three was an incredible
experience. We had to extend the scenario in order to catch
the ship unprepared. After seven hours -" at this, loud
muttering and outcries from the team, then silence. "After
seven hours of scenario time, the captain Gold Four went off
duty, and Red One assumed command. We had to invent an
asteroid field as a hazard, and fortunately the Navigator
Red Three missed looking for it. Severe ship damage had
taken place before the Captain was called back, and Gold
Four extracted the ship and despite being a `floating
coffin' in space in his own words, he detonated the cargo in
a ninth order power shock wave. In his own words, either the
Guild or Starfleet would have investigated immediately, and
we concur. That ended the simulation at seven hours forty
nine minutes. Team Three performed beyond any exercise to
date."

That was followed by a roar of cheering. The leader then
concluded, "The earlier sequences all were well executed,
with particular distinction by the Gold, Blue, and Silver
squads. Gold Four again was the only ship to get a tractor
lock on the target."

More cheering, and the time began to close. The leader ended
with, "The ratings list will be posted shortly, by Team,
Squad, and individual. This, as always has been a pleasure
and exciting, but I think this time I will add hair-raising.
Any rating one hundred or less will be issued an invitation
to Flight School. Any rating ten or less will be eligible
for War School as well. Thank you and good day." And the
debrief closed.

Kerryn drew a breath of appreciation. They had to extend the
scenario to trip up his ship! That was so cool. And seconds
later, Illiar and some of his friends were on the subspace
net.

"Way to go, Kerryn! You're in for sure!"

Kerryn took a bow. "You have no idea how terrified I was
when we started."

"How did you know what to do?"

"I didn't. When you called out about the captain being on
the bridge, it kind of hit me that we were on the bridge of
what? And in what condition? And then, why are we out in
space anyway, right? Cargo. First thing to do is see what we
have and where it is going, and the next, etc, right? That's
what I did."

The simulator beeped and the subspace link was suddenly
abuzz. Ratings were out. Kerryn scrolled through the ninety
six names until he found Gold Four. And what was there made
his heart almost stop.

He had a rating of one.

A quick skim showed that ratings went down to five hundred.
Most were in the two hundreds. Illiar had a forty. "Well,
Illiar, at least you and I are in."

"Yup. Milo and Danel as well. Milo got a sixty two and Danel
an eighty."

"Cool!"

Illiar then spoke slowly. "Kerryn, you got a one. The
highest possible. Dude, YOU GET TO GO TO WAR SCHOOL TOO!!"

"And no wonder, too!" That was one of his friends.

Kerryn yawned, but felt elated. "My Dad's gonna shit."

Illiar grinned. "I don't think so. By the way, we're only a
parsec apart. We'll be at 290 in a couple hours. Better
pack!"

"Thanks!" And they signed off.

Doryn was elated, to say the least. As they approached
Starbase 290, Kerryn had packed his things for the four-day
break. Totentanz sidled up to the station, and within
minutes of docking Kerryn and Illiar were together in the
one of the nearby bars.

Drinking a carbonated beverage, they went over every instant
of the simulation exercise. His more modern simulator was
able to report the status on the others beyond his group,
whereas Kerryn's was ancient. He made up his mind to find an
upgrade somehow.

Illiar just sat back. "I am so tired."

Kerryn grinned, and regarded his friend thoughtfully. Illiar
had grown since their last meeting. He was taller now, and
his black hair was short and pristine. His eyes were blue,
and Kerryn noticed that there was something enticing about
him. It made him feel warm inside to be with Illiar, and
unconsciously he scanned his friend briefly.

What was there surprised him. Illiar was looking at him, and
he was seeing him very differently. Kerryn's brown eyes had
Illiar's attention, as well as his longer brown hair. Illiar
seemed to want to fix it somehow. And then a thought of
Kerryn with no shirt on fled through his mind, and the
sensation of that was entirely new to Kerryn. He broke
contact, and knew that Illiar would never know it happened.
Kerryn was very good that way. But he realized that Illiar
was attracted to him.

With new interest, he tried to look at Illiar that way.
Charming eyes. Nice hair. Great smile. And the question
swept through Kerryn: What did Illiar look like now without
a shirt? Or pants? Kerryn realized he wanted to know.

"Something on your mind?"

Kerryn blushed a little. "A lot. Hard to describe. But I am
looking forward to our days together."

"And nights! Mom and Dad say we can stay up and do whatever
we want."

Kerryn yawned again. "Sleep, tonight. Then we'll see
tomorrow."

Illiar leaned forward. "I've got some stuff to show you.
Later. But its gonna be good."

Kerryn grinned, and again scanned briefly. Illiar had porn.
And not just any porn, he had gay porn. Suddenly lots of
things clicked into place. This would be exciting.

They made their way onto Illiar's family ship. Its name was
the Tarantella, and it was large, sleek and very state of
the art. Illiar's parents gave Kerryn his own cabin, but
also run of the ship as long as he stayed out of the flight
and engineering sections. This surprised him; didn't Illiar
help run the ship? Apparently not.

That night, in Illiar's cabin, he closed the door and Illiar
revealed his stash.

"Ever hear of porn?"

Kerryn nodded. "Yeah, my dad has some. He doesn't know it
but I have seen some of it. Reasonably tame."

"Tame?"

"Yeah. Guy fucks girl, girl fucks guy. Same scenes over and
over again. Turns a two minute experience into an hour long
flick."

Illiar grinned. "Well, I have better than that." He stopped,
took a breath, and said, "Kerryn, can you keep a secret?"

"Sure."

"Do you know what being gay is?"

Kerryn nodded slowly. "Its about boys liking boys more than
girls. More than just friends, but sex too."

Illiar just looked at him. Worry and terror etched his face,
and for a moment the effervescent personality that so
defined Illiar was lost to him. Illiar just couldn't
actually say it. So Kerryn jumped forward. "You think you
might be gay?"

Illiar nodded. "Uh huh."

"How do you know?"

"Ever get hard?"

Kerryn blushed. "Yeah, lots."

"What makes you hard?"

"Lots of stuff. I never really thought about it."

Illiar gave him a knowing look. "Well, I have. What gets me
hard are boys. Forget girls. This," and he indicated the
pile of media, "is gay porn." He shuffled a little. "I was
kind of hoping that we could figure out what I am feeling."

Kerryn nodded. "Illiar, I was noticing you earlier tonight,
and I think it kind of describes what you might be feeling.
We probably owe it to ourselves to figure this out."

Illiar looked relieved. "You'll help me?"

"We'll do it together."

That night, the two boys slept in Illiar's cabin. They
decided to take their shirts off as a start. Illiar was pale
and nicely developed for a fourteen-year-old. Kerryn,
however had the influence of his Betazoid blood and his
coppery skin encased a nice, muscular body. He certainly
wasn't a body builder, but he was lean, smooth, and etched.
Illiar couldn't take his eyes off him.

"Wow, Kerryn. How do you get like that?"

Kerryn grinned. "I'm not all human. I'm only half,
remember?"

"What is the other half?"

"Can you keep a secret?" Illiar nodded, intrigued, so Kerryn
told him. "My mom was full Betazoid. It's really close to
human, but some minor differences."

"Wicked." Illiar's eyes were hungry, and Kerryn really was
grateful for his friend. He knew that he loved Illiar almost
as much as his dad. So he daringly offered, "You can check
me out if you want, for differences. Maybe it will help with
the gay thing."

Illiar nodded, but held his breath in excitement as Kerryn
slipped off his pants and undergarments. "See? Same cock,
same balls, same butt. Betazoids aren't very hairy, so I
won't be either." He walked slowly around.

Illiar was a study in realization. "Kerryn, you look so
great." He came over, closer, and asked very quietly, "Can I
touch you?"

Kerryn nodded, uncertain now, and Illiar brought his hand
and gently stroked Kerryn's chest. That was enough, and
Kerryn's cock stiffened immediately. But neither one moved,
as Illiar's hand slid down over Kerryn's abdomen and down to
his cock. He stroked it, gently, and Kerryn whispered,
"Don't do that or its gonna shoot." And Illiar stopped.

"Oh god, Kerryn! That was so awesome." Illiar looked away.
"The way that felt, I think I've got to be gay. I've tried
the same with a couple girls but there's nothing there. This
felt so much more."

"I got hard too. That surprised me."

Illiar looked back at Kerryn's hard cock, and his face took
on a look of deep desire. "I want to make you shoot so bad,
Kerryn." His voice dropped to a whisper. "Will you let me?"

Before Kerryn thought, he blurted out the words. "Only if I
can do the same for you."

Illiar nodded, and came over to Kerryn with a towel. His
hand slowly came in contact with Kerryn's cock, and then
slowly began stroking it up and down. Poor Kerryn was so
excited in one way, and so adventurous in another way that
he couldn't relax enough to cum right away. So a minute
passed, and suddenly the manipulations going on was too much
for the adventurer and with an "Oh, fuck!" Kerryn's cock
surged in intensity, meeting that focused pleasure point and
then with strong spasms pumped out the cum that Illiar
caught in his hands and on the towel.

"Kerryn, that was awesome!"

"That felt so fucking good. I almost couldn't stand up!"

They giggled, and cleaned up. Illiar was still half dressed,
and a moment of embarrassment came over him. "You still want
to keep going?"

Kerryn nodded, and then grinned. "Have to do it right, you
know."

Illiar slowly dropped the rest of his clothes. He was pale,
his lower half was not nearly as developed as Kerryn's but
that was OK. Kerryn made him lie down for this, and with his
hands he stroked Illiar's chest, like before, and worked his
way down to his cock. But Kerryn didn't stop there. His
hands stroked the inside of Illiar's thighs, causing Illiar
to shake and twitch. He gently cupped Illiar's balls,
feeling them in his soft skin, and then with fingers ready
he began to sensually stroke Illiar's cock. Illiar lasted
half a minute before spewing his own cum on his chest.

Illiar was amazed. Kerryn almost seemed to know what to do.
A sudden suspicion rose in him. "Kerryn, how often do you
wank?"

"Wank?"

"You know, play with your cock until it spurts."

Kerryn blushed a little, and then said quietly, "Once or
twice a day. You?"

"Not that much, but I think I will start."

Adventure was over, and they got ready for bed. Illiar made
the first offer. "Want to sleep up here with me?"

"You bet!" And they climbed into bed. Illiar gave him a
little kiss goodnight, and said, "Thanks, Kerryn. You are
the best friend I could have."

"Thanks too, Illiar. I love you." And they went to sleep.

Four days later, Illiar and Kerryn had wanked themselves and
each other at least a half dozen times each day. There was
no doubt in Illiar's mind that he was gay. Kerryn also had a
good understanding that he would very much enjoy other boys.
And Illiar's parents were none the wiser, as they had barely
seen them.

Totentanz was another experience. Kerryn and Illiar arrived
to find that Illiar could have his own cabin or move in with
Kerryn. They chose the latter. Illiar could have the run of
the ship, including the Navigation and Propulsion sections.
Doryn was much more interactive with them, and while the
trip was fun and entertaining, Kerryn and Illiar didn't have
as much time alone. However, the gay interests of the two
boys were cemented on the evening of the last day.

They had said goodnight to Doryn, and were in Kerryn's
cabin. Neither was really interested in wanking. In fact, it
was Illiar who was staring out the window at the stars when
Kerryn came over and sat next to him.

"OK, I know it's going to be hard. I've been so happy these
eight days."

Illiar nodded. "Will you wait for me?"

"You've decided you are gay?"

Illiar nodded again. And Kerryn laughed. "Good, because I
decided I was six days ago. And yes, I will wait for you."
And he gave Illiar a kiss on the cheek.

Illiar turned. "Would you kiss me for real?"

Kerryn nodded. "Yes, although I don't think I am very good
at it."

"Do it anyway, please?"

Kerryn stood, and pulled Illiar up. "Shirts off." And they
pulled their shirts off, exposing the chest and skin that
each were so familiar with now. Kerryn slowly took Illiar
into his arms, and stared right into his eyes. He tilted his
head slightly, and brought his face close until their lips
touched, and Illiar moaned as the contact strengthened. But
it was Illiar who parted his lips, and when their tongues
touched it set a wave of desire, friendship, and intimacy
through them both. They explored this new sensation, and
then broke to catch their breath.

"I liked that a lot."

"So did I." And like two young lovers, they got into bed and
snuggled together. Sex was over, this was two friends
keeping warm and close.

When Illiar had returned to his family, and Kerryn had
resettled to the routine on Totentanz, Doryn decided it was
time for a chat with his son.

"Kerryn, sit down. We need to have a chat."

Maybe the days of separation had made it more obvious, but
Kerryn had grown up a lot. He moved his lanky form into a
chair. "What's up, Dad?"

"You're different after your vacation with Illiar. Want to
talk?"

Kerryn shifted uncomfortably. "I am different. I guess I
know who I am a little better. And I miss Illiar."

"That is quite obvious." At Kerryn's surprise, Doryn
grinned. "The question is, what about him are you missing?"
A blush crept into Kerryn as Doryn watched. "I think I know,
but you have to say it for yourself. You can't hide from it.
It is a part of you."

Kerryn gulped. "Dad, I'm gay."

"That wasn't so bad, was it? How do you know?"

"Well, Illiar had some questions, and I guess I did too. We
explored a little, and it became pretty obvious."

Doryn nodded. "OK." He coughed uncomfortably. "Kerryn, your
mom gave me some specific information about Betazoids for
you. You need to know it, and I want to tell you about it.
OK?"

Kerryn nodded, amazed. They never spoke about Analee. "OK.
Why now?"

"You're of age in Betazoid culture. And your admission about
Illiar sealed it."

First, Doryn explained that he would mature earlier. All
biology was compatible, although the average Betazoid had a
larger cock by a little bit than the average human, although
humans had greater variability in size. Any sexual
orientation was acceptable in Betazoid culture. Betazoids
were sterile unless a particular herbal beverage was
consumed, and that kept the population down as well as the
openness and sexual interest of the culture up.

Kerryn blushed furiously through the beginning of this, but
dealt with it and realized it was a sincere cultural study
he was getting from his father. He didn't realize the hard
parts were coming up.

Doryn got himself a glass of water. "Kerryn, there are two
things left. The first is mental. You can enter the mind of
your partners during sex, and increase their experience a
hundredfold with careful stimulation in the right place." He
smiled. "Analee used to do that for me. It was absolutely
amazing. I will give you some information on this, as well
as other mental exercises. You are part Betazoid, you should
use it."

"OK, Dad. Thanks. I had no idea on that one."

"Here is the last one. Betazoids call it the Frenzy." And he
explained how one in every fifty or so meetings of Betazoid
descendents make a chemical-biological synergy bond that
must be seen through to completion or else pay the price of
insanity. "The key feeling seems to be a burning desire to
be one with this total stranger. Once on, it stays on and
grows until the experience is over. And the Frenzy does not
discriminate between men or women, gay or straight, willing
or unwilling. Just go along for the ride."

Kerryn's eyes were wide. "That's pretty scary, Dad. I'm
surprised the Betazoids allow it."

"They can't avoid it. It is going to happen to you, probably
several times." He handed Kerryn a data chip. "This is the
Betazed standard educational program for their biology. It
goes in the EPU." He grinned. "Knowing that you are a horny
young man, I suggest you study it. The mental ones too." He
shook his finger. "Just don't try them on me without asking
first. I know how to deal with wily Betazoids."

A moment of pain flickered, and Kerryn asked the question
that had not been brought up in almost eight years. "Dad, do
you think we will see mom again?"

Doryn shrugged. "I don't know. I haven't gone looking." And
that ended that.

While they kept in contact, Illiar and Kerryn had nearly
eight weeks before flight school. During that time, Doryn
acquired a broken PK-90 Simulator, and Kerryn brought it
back to full working order. Now he saw what a lot of the
others had seen from their simulators, and he could
appreciate what was going on. They took their annual stop at
Delvin Six, where the doctors pronounced both Doryn and
Kerryn in excellent health. At that point, Kerryn was
surprised to receive an implant.

"What's that for?" Implants were like old-fashioned shots,
injected just under the skin.

"Flight permit. Your results qualified you for basic flight.
You just needed to be thirteen to get it." Doryn smiled
knowingly. He had a surprise for Kerryn.

"A Flight Permit!?! This implant will let me fly in a real
ship?"

"You bet, after you've trained on it. It is updated as you
go, but you needed the implant first."

Doryn knew then that his son would love the little trainer
craft that he had bought. It was used, and not the best
model, but he had the fairing on top of the Propulsion deck
extended and pressurized as a hangar for the little craft
while Kerryn was with Illiar.

As they walked back to Totentanz, Kerryn noticed from a
window that the fairing was larger. It wasn't often that you
get this view, and Doryn had made special arrangements to
ensure Kerryn would see it. And like the observant thirteen
year old that he was, he saw it.

"Dad, what did you do to the aft dorsal fairing? It's
bigger, and extends to the end of the ship."

Doryn grinned. "Ah. Well, you see, I had it extended and
pressurized. We needed the extra space."

"It looks like a little hangar. What do we need the space
for?"

"You'll just have to see, won't you?"

Kerryn couldn't resist. He scanned his Dad, and found the
image of a small two-seat spacecraft in his mind, sitting in
the hangar. "DAD!! YOU DIDN'T, DID YOU??"

Wow, Doryn thought, he lifted that out without a touch. But
in words, he nodded. "What good is an implant if you have
nothing to fly? Happy birthday, Kerryn."

Well, that was the end of coherent thought for Kerryn. He
just couldn't believe it. They went up together, went over
every system, every aspect of it that they could get their
hands on. They ran diagnostics, checked controls, and Kerryn
climbed into the seat and just stretched for a moment. Then,
like lightning he was all over the controls and indicators.

"Dad, thanks ever so much! When can I take her out?"

"After we depart and are in open space for a while, and also
after you have read the documentation." He handed him an EPU
chip. "You've got a modern simulator, now. This little ship
here should be in its database. Get some qual hours on the
simulator, and then we'll see."

Kerryn took that very seriously. But before he dug into her,
he had to tell Illiar.

It was a week before he felt that he could actually fly. The
first flight was out in clear space. He had his new flight
suit, and was ready to go when Doryn came on the comm unit.

"Are you ready?"

"Yes, Dad!"

"Be careful. On return, match velocity with the ship first,
and then ease yourself in."

With all green lights, he released the hangar doors and they
slid open. The next button released the force field, and the
hanger depressurized. Finally, he released the magnetic
catches, and with a touch on the thrusters he was off.

He was free. His aft scanners showed the Totentanz
retreating behind him slowly. He pulled some sharp turns,
and the little craft strained in response. The simulators
were close, but nothing could compare to the actual flight
in a real spacecraft.

"Dad, it's awesome!" And he pulled more of his nauseating
spirals and corkscrews that he had gotten so good at on the
simulator.

"Watch it, Kerryn! Don't push too hard or you'll puke. It
isn't quite the same as a sim."

That was too true, but before Kerryn really did puke he
evened out his flight. He realized that he was very
disoriented, and it took a couple seconds for the scanner to
show him Totentanz. Gracefully arcing back towards the ship,
he slowed and measured her lengthwise. It had been years
since he had been out in a space suit, and this way he got
to make detailed surveys of Totentanz. He then shot full
speed out ahead of the larger ship, and found that he could
get quite a bit of speed out of this little craft. He could
actually hit half light speed! Pulling a perfect inside loop
and roll maneuver, he returned back to Totentanz. With his
dad's advice, he matched velocity to the Totentanz, and
slowly eased himself into the hangar. The force fields came
on, magnetic catches held, and the when the little hangar
was pressurized, Kerryn climbed out of the craft and just
ran his hands all over it. He loved it, and it was his.

Of course, he immediately went over the engineering manuals
for it, and changed out dozens of flow regulators and
relays. He recalibrated all the inertial dampers, and
cleaned and polished the thrusters. A little touch-up paint
here and there, and while it wasn't the latest and sleekest,
it was his and it was good.

Doryn had warned him about bragging. "Kerryn, you and most
of your friends have the implant now, but I asked around and
you are the only one who actually has a permit to fly on
your own. Be careful about that, OK?"

Kerryn nodded, surprised. "How did that happen?"

Doryn grinned. "All that time on the simulator, and your
completion of the Guild Operations EPU. Most of your friends
haven't started it. Which reminds me, how is Starfleet
coming?"

"OK. Engineering is actually kind of similar to the Guild.
I'm gonna get bogged down in the Ambassadorial ones,
though."

Talking with Illiar was great. Illiar's parents had bought
him a ship too, a nice new one from Prevyar. Kerryn's was
built by Turian Shipworks, which was considerably smaller
and less mainstream, but had none of the nice features or
expensive look as a Prevyar did. But Kerryn was not the
slightest bit jealous.

"It's beautiful, Illiar! How does it fly?"

His friend's face fell. "Don't know yet. I'm still getting
qualified on her. Another week or so. But I'll get there,
and when I do I will swing and dance among the stars! I'll
do spirals around the Tarantella, even the Totentanz!"

Kerryn laughed. "I bet you will. How fast will she go?"

"Half light speed."

"I'll bet we could tune her up to go faster."

Illiar's eyes popped. "Go under the hood? Not me! Let a tech
do that."

And that was Kerryn's first exposure to the prevalent
attitude among most freighters. Captains didn't do tech
work. Techs did the menial maintenance work. Kerryn let it
slide, but it did taint his happiness. And Doryn noticed.

"All right, son, what's going on?"

"Huh?"

"Something's bothering you. It isn't the ship, is it?"

"No, Dad." He sighed. "It was something Illiar said. He
seems to think that techs are not as good as captains, and
as if captains and their families were better than techs."

Doryn also sighed. "Some of the more wealthy families tend
to look down on the techs, that is true. It kind of depends
upon who your customers are. If you do work for planetary
governments, then you get a little used to that. Techs work
for us and with us. The reality is that without the
technical experts and engineers, we wouldn't be anywhere."

Kerryn then voiced his real fear. "Dad, I'm just afraid that
it is gonna be a problem between Illiar and me. I like the
tech work, and I really am good at it."

Doryn nodded, and gently said, "Well, then if Illiar can't
adapt, then he may not be the right one for you."

Flight school was a day away, and the momentum was gaining.
Kerryn decided to arrive the night before and check in
early, as was his option. Totentanz was on a tight cargo
trip, so Kerryn and his dad decided to fly the little Turian
in to the school and keep it in one of the small side
hangars with the other small craft.

Crossing the immense hangar platform of the school, he began
to appreciate its size. It was as large as the largest
starbase he had ever seen, and there were ships of all kinds
here. The entire hangar could have held fifty Totentanz
ships! But it was clearly marked, especially for one who had
the training required, and Kerryn and his duffel bag made it
to the orientation center.

A Guild member was present at the desk. "May I help you?"

Kerryn responded, "Yes. I am Kerryn of Delvin Six, here to
start in the Flight School, for an early check-in."

"Very good. Station time is 2310 hours. Your suite is in
section 23, cluster A. Orientation is at 0700." A device was
handed to him. "Tomorrow will be devoted to station
orientation and some socialization. Schooling begins the
next day. The callsign you were given on the exercise is how
you will be referred to, and you are Gold Four. Do you have
an implant?"

"Yes, sir." Kerryn held his wrist to the scanner.

The Guild member's eyebrows rose. "Thank you. Since you are
already licensed, you have full access to the school
although tomorrow you will be told that you do not. No one
will know this unless you disclose it."

Kerryn was surprised. "Is it that unusual?"

A shrug. "It happens sometimes."

His suite was actually a common room with study areas,
bathrooms and a separate bedroom area where six boys stayed.
Not quite barracks, but certainly close quarters. Kerryn
knew he would have trouble sleeping, so he picked a low bed
by the door. He put his things away, and was shortly greeted
by another boy.

Kerryn stood and gave the traditional greeting. "Kerryn of
Delvin Six."

"Thomas Silver of Mobius II." Thomas was a somewhat older
boy, fifteen, serious but with that twinkle that showed he
was excited to be there.

"Welcome, Thomas. I just got in half an hour ago."

"Cool. Any bed we want?"

Kerryn nodded. "I don't sleep much so I took this one." Some
more idle chatter, and one more boy came in. He was about
the same age as Thomas.

"Mike Bonno, Aran III. Am I last?" Mike was an easy, affable
type guy. His deep voice betrayed his age, and he had a
relaxed confidence about him. He would be everyone's basic
friend.

The older two boys took beds near Kerryn's, but up high.
Both of them were on the same simulation run that Kerryn
was. Both were on Team Two, and Kerryn had been on Team
Three.

"So, anyone got a ship?" This was Mike. "I have a Prevyar
EPX. Modest, but very comfortable inside. Flies like silk."

"Prevyar EP3." This was Thomas. "Almost as nice. I'm working
towards a new one once out of school, maybe an FX10."

Kerryn grinned. "I lose. I've got a Turian Zephyr. It's
pretty agile."

Thomas grinned back. "The Zephyr was pretty good in its day.
Don't sell it short."

Mike, however, was unimpressed. "Well, you can always
upgrade later."

Kerryn shrugged. They would find out sooner or later. "We
don't have a lot of money lying around. I got it and had to
rebuild parts of it." Oops, well, maybe they didn't catch
it.

They didn't. It was Mike who sealed it, though. "Can't wait
to get off that tether, that's all I know." A large yawn
flooded him, and set the other two boys doing the same. "I'm
going to bed."

They all got ready, and took to their beds. Kerryn looked
around for a light switch, but Thomas beat him to it.
"Computer! Dim lights to 5 percent." And the lights went
down.

Shortly thereafter, the other two boys were asleep. Kerryn
felt very much alone and isolated. There was a word for him,
one that he didn't like but it was probably true. Boonie. A
boonie was someone who spent a lot of time out of social
circles. These guys he was with were used to technology and
the customary luxury environment. Kerryn was not, but he
figured he could get used to it. Voice actuated commands.
Doors that opened by themselves. No wall switches. None of
those things were present on Totentanz.

The next day saw a flurry of activity. So much to see and
learn. He saw Illiar, and they greeted each other warmly.
Illiar seemed to have no trouble integrating. Kerryn wished
that he had such a skill. But the shining socialites led the
day as all focused on their new surroundings. The next day
they would start the school.

The spacecraft they used for flight school were cool. They
could go to half light speed, had shields and micro-tractor
beams on them, and were overloaded with safety features
including anti-collision deflectors. Kerryn had mastered the
simulator in half a day, and received his additional
qualification on the implant to fly that class of spacecraft
at will. He grinned at that one. All the others would be on
supervision. After lunch that day, he was the first and only
one to make it to the training hangar, where he could select
his ship. The head of the tech department followed he and
the instructor through the field of ships.

They watched as Kerryn inspected the new ones, and shook his
head. He worked his way down the row, and finally he looked
back at the lead tech in frustration.

"Which one is the oldest?"

Eyebrows raised, the tech pointed at one four ships down.
"That one. It is in good working order, as are they all."

"Really?"

The tech started slightly, and then realized that this
wasn't some random flyboy. "Well, it wasn't used last
session but it was in every other one for fifteen years."

"Let's go look." And the instructor followed curiously.

Kerryn saw it then, and it was what he wanted. Turian had
made it, too. Slightly heavier, dented, scraped, but sound
and the thrust nacelles were well worked in. He climbed up,
ran a systems check, climbed down, and went under to open
the service panel. Things were in order, but he could see a
dozen things that needed attention. Perfect.

He stood back, and for show, kicked the hangar clamps, which
set the tech laughing. "This is the one."

"You are sure?" The instructor was skeptical.

"Yes, sir."

"So be it." He brought a scanner over, and gave it Kerryn's
command codes. "Scan in, please." And Kerryn turned red as
he raised the implant to the ship, and it immediately showed
his independent flight status.

"You have your permit already?"

"Yes, sir, although I was advised not to advertise that."

"I see. Good work." And then it hit the instructor. "What
are your engineering qualifications?"

"Engineering Level 7, Propulsion Level 9, Operations Level
9, and Power Systems Level 11. Sir."

"Why are you in flight school?" The tech was grinning fit to
split.

Kerryn got scared. "I don't understand, sir. Everyone wants
to go to Flight School."

"Those engineering qualifications outrank even the
graduating techs here. How did you get all those quals?" The
instructor suddenly realized he was scaring Kerryn, and
changed his mind. "Come on over to the benches over here.
You aren't in trouble and you aren't being thrown out. But
it is most unusual for someone with your quals to be here."

The three of them sat down, and Kerryn tried to calm down a
little as the instructor asked him, "Tell us about your last
couple years, please."

"Well, sirs, I grew up on a light freighter. My mom left
when I was five, and ever since then my father and I have
been working cargo in the Aurigaen Belt."

"That's pretty far out territory, and not easy space either.
Where were you in the crew roster?"

Kerryn shook his head. "No crew. Just the two of us. I spent
a lot of time in simulator and on the EPU when I could.
There isn't much else to do out there. Repairs are expensive
too, and I had to learn another language to interact with
our drive. In exchange for subspace access, I worked
maintenance for the ship. Someday my dad will want to
retire, and then I'll need a flight permit and
qualifications, so I was really happy to get into the Pre-
Flight Exercise and then the Flight School itself."

"What language?"

"Romulan. It really is-"

The instructor turned to the tech. "Know any Romulan?"

"Some." He turned to Kerryn, and haltingly asked a question.
Kerryn giggled, and responded in a phonetic flow of
symbology that was both stunning in its complexity and yet
had a technical beauty to it. It was like listening to
crystal.

The tech turned back to the instructor. "He's way beyond
me." He turned and grinned at Kerryn. "What was so funny?"

"Well, sir, your accent is terrible."

The tech laughed. "I don't warrant a sir, you know. I'm just
the tech."

"Oh no. Everyone warrants a sir, and there is no such thing
as just a tech."

Silence. The instructor rolled his eyes. The tech stood in
shock, as the instructor looked at Kerryn. "Do you know what
a boonie is?"

Kerryn looked down. "Yes, sir. Among other things, it's me."

"It is not a bad thing. It means you are much more self-
sufficient and independent. You can survive on your own. And
you don't have much experience with the social peculiarities
here. Many see it as a negative thing, but the reality is
that they will be dead long before you will." He turned to
the tech. "Get him whatever he needs. I suspect the guts of
that ship he just selected will be on the floor within an
hour. He has carte blanche access." He turned back to
Kerryn. "You'll find out what that is later."

"Thank you, sir!"

The instructor got up to go, and then turned back. "What is
your callsign?"

"Gold Four, sir."

He stopped. He stared. "You were the captain for Team
Three."

"Yes, sir."

"Damn. And you did it on a PJ series simulator." He laughed
suddenly. "Your ass must have been very sore after that. PJ-
series were very uncomfortable."

"I won't deny it, sir."

The instructor left, and the lead tech got him some basic
tools. "May as well hold onto them." He assigned him a
locker, and then turned back to Kerryn. "You are going to
need stuff. Either come to me, or ask for Ramon. Ramon is a
gifted tech, though not as qualified as yourself. He also is
a boonie, and I think could use a friend. Don't force it,
but I think you guys could do well together." He said
quietly, "He loves to fly, but doesn't have the ear for it."

And that was how the first week went. Kerryn would start in
the simulator, and then leave to go work on the ship. The
lead tech was there the first couple times to watch, but
knew expertise when he saw it and left Kerryn alone. He ate
with the other flight boys, did homework, and ran around the
station for exercise. Some of the older boys liked to drink
synthehol, as was their prerogative, but Kerryn avoided it
after a taste.

His roommates queried him once in a while, but he was always
doing something or going somewhere. Eventually it would
break, though, and Kerryn started to get anxious. More boys
were qualified now, and fortunately he had finished the
overhaul on his ship. And it flew absolutely beautifully.

It was at this point that there was scheduled a social
event. The Flight School was coeducational, but the students
had been in simulators so much that there was really no
interaction other than in their suites. This first mixer had
many rumors about it, and Kerryn knew something was up when
the older boys began partitioning off part of the room.

"What's going on?"

They looked at him in surprise. "We wanna get laid tonight,
dude! This way we can get two to a room." They had all laid
out nice clothes, perfect for strutting around in. Kerryn
realized he hadn't brought any formal wear. "Here are the
rules: If the curtain is open, that side of the room is
free, otherwise it is occupied." They finished the
partition. "How long has it been for you?"

"Hey, I'm only just fourteen, remember. I haven't done all
that much." That was a risk, but he wasn't going to hide it.

"Really?"

Mike chimed in, bailing him out. "Dude, I didn't do anything
until I was fourteen. So shut up."  He looked at Kerryn.
"You look a lot older than fourteen. I've seen you in the
buff and that is not an fourteen year old's body."

Kerryn could respond to this one easily. "I'm not entirely
human. I've got at least a little of some other race in me.
That, and I do keep myself in shape." He grinned. "Anyone
want to join me in a run at 0500?"

"NO!" And Mike added, "I hope to be getting laid still at
0500." That brought a round of laughter. And at that point
Kerryn knew where he was going tonight.

The confrontation came later. His roommates had all gone on
ahead, and Kerryn told them not to wait for him because he
would be late. He dressed in ordinary clothes, and was on
his way to the hangar when he met Illiar in the crisscross
of corridors.

"Kerryn! How'ya doing?"

"Good, good enough. Qualified yet?"

"Just today. You?"

"Only a little earlier."

Illiar looked at him. "So like, where are your glad rags?"

Kerryn shook his head. "I didn't bring any. Didn't know we
needed to have some. So I figured I would sit this one out
until I could get some." He smiled. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you too. It's been so busy, though, and so many
new people." Illiar was fifteen now. The difference between
them was ever wider. "How are your roommates?"

"Fine. Older. They've all used blankets to put up walls in
our bedroom so that they can get laid in privacy. I decided
it was easier to all-nighter it."

Illiar knew something was up. "C'mon, Kerryn. I'll loan you
some clothes. This is the first mixer. You've got to go. Who
knows who is waiting for you?"

Some of the other students saw the discussion, but did not
hear the content. Like flies to a light, it began to draw a
small crowd.

"Illiar, you remember what I declared to you. I'd rather not
deal with any of that right now."

Illiar stared. "Kerryn, that was before girls. Who was the
last girl you met?" At the shake of the head, Illiar
snorted. "Let me tell you, they can be just as amazing.
Maybe you and I both will get lucky tonight."

Kerryn stepped back, hurt. "No thanks, Illiar. I'm not in
the mood."

"Damn it, Kerryn you are acting like a damn boonie!"

Something in Kerryn snapped then. The first thing that
caught his eye was the restricted corridor, which he knew
among other things led to a bar. It was only for licensed
pilots. Fury blew over him, and those watching saw his
features harden and his eyes begin to burn with a bronze
glow. He stared at Illiar for the first time, realizing that
his friend had become an elitist, and said, "That's because
I am a boonie." And he stalked off towards the restricted
section.

"Kerryn, wait! You can't go in there. It's restricted." And
as he and the crowd watched, Kerryn stormed up to the
scanner, held up his arm, and the light flashed green and
admitted him, and he disappeared.

Illliar stood, stunned. How did Kerryn get in? Then it
dawned on him that he must have his flight permit already,
on that ridiculous little Turian. Oh well. He turned and
rejoined the group on their way to the mixer. And he did get
laid that night, with a pretty blond thing, and Kerryn far
from his mind.

Kerryn stormed down the corridor, but with each step the
fury abated and the resignation of being exposed flooded
him. By the time he entered the mall, he found the bar and
headed for it with a more controlled step. It was not
crowded, and having been to bars many times with his father,
he went up to the bar and sat on a stool.

The bartender came over. "What'll it be?"

Kerryn had only before ever had carbonated beverages. He
looked up at the top shelf, and picked the first name he
saw.

"Bourbon." And he handed over a credit chit.

The glass of amber liquid was delivered, and deducted.
Kerryn tasted it slowly. It burned, but in a pleasant way.
He closed his eyes and savored the flavor. Rich. He liked
it. And it made him warm inside.

"You're pretty young to be drinking already."

Kerryn turned to find the lead tech standing there. Well,
whatever. "I've been in bars all my life. That's where you
pick up the route news."

"Mind if I join you?"

"Not at all." And the older man sat next to him.

"Want to talk about it?"

"Not really. But I probably should not have retreated into
here. I was hoping to explore on less sudden terms."

They were quiet, and then Kerryn gave in. "All right, you
talked me into it. Illiar is my best friend. We've spent a
lot of time together, but always on a ship. Apparently he
has a more eclectic lifestyle than I knew, and I was more of
a boonie than he knew. It came out today. I've worked hard,
invested a lot of myself into this, and to have it thrown
back at me because I didn't want to go to the mixer . well,
I snapped. There'll be hell to pay."

They were quiet, and then the lead tech spoke. "I saw the
whole thing, but didn't know what was going on. It looked
more like a lover's quarrel."

Kerryn blushed. "It could have been, except it wasn't. And
that is something I don't want to discuss."

"All right. So, tell me about your ship. You had said that
it was in the main hangar."

"It's on the older side. A Turian Zephyr. My dad bought it
for me a couple months ago. It was flyable, but they
couldn't sell it for much because it had some custom parts.
There are revisions all over the manuals. It was pretty
worn, so I had to overhaul it. It took me about two weeks,
but oh was it worth it!"

The head tech nodded. "Turian put out a great ship. I used
to have an A-series Zephyr. What series do you have?"

"D-series. It looks like they had taken the C-series manuals
and marked them up for the D. Kind of annoying, but at least
they were accurate."

The head tech looked at Kerryn in disbelief. "You have a
Turian Shipworks Zephyr D? What serial number?"

Kerryn shrugged. "I don't know. Why?"

"Is it really here?"

"Yeah, its in the hangar."

He got up and dragged Kerryn with him. "Let's go see it."
And on the way, he told Kerryn that Turian had only made
five of them. The shipworks had sold off the small ship
business to Prevyar, who tossed out the expensive design and
mass-manufactured the small ships on the cheap. When they
got to the hangar, both were admitted and they walked to the
side location.

There was the little Turian. Kerryn had forgotten how much
he liked the little craft, and how good it looked now. The
head tech was all over it, his fingers itching to caress
like it was real. He leaned over and looked at the
identifying plate, and read. "Turian Shipworks, Zephyr D,
Serial Number 5. Soli Deo Gloria, Turian, CEO and
President." He turned to Kerryn. "He signed it himself. I
had never thought to see the actual last Zephyr D. You've
got it in great shape."

Kerryn was a little wary. "You treat it like it is sacred."

The head tech laughed. "Well, to Turian enthusiasts like me,
it is. Ramon too. When you can, you have to show this to
him. He'll be in love with it, and you too."

They walked back. The head tech smiled. "Thank you, Gold
Four. Since you are licensed, you can fly in and out of here
on it in your free time. Not like the others."

"Thanks, I'll remember that."

"Shouldn't you be on your way to bed now?"

Kerryn laughed. "I doubt I could sleep with all the fucking
going on." Then he blushed.

"I see. Hold on." He accessed his communicator. "Ramon, it's
me. I need you to put someone up for the night. He's got a
Zephyr D."

"NO SHIT!" sailed over the communicator.

The head tech rolled his eyes. "We'll meet you at the tech
entrance. Tech out." And then he apologized to Kerryn for
the language.

"Don't worry, I've heard the term before."

"Ramon is a boonie too. He's very easy to get along with.
He's right over there." And Kerryn turned to find a young
man sprinting over to them.

Ramon gave the traditional greeting. "Ramon of Alamander
II."

"Kerryn of Delvin Six."

"So you got screwed out of your bed tonight?"

"In a manner of speaking."

They eyed each other. The head tech was smiling to himself.
The best tech, the best flyer, spanning a social gap a mile
wide. It was like Romeo and Juliet.

Ramon was pure tech. Flexible, sinewy, light brown hair
clipped and out of the way, with sparkling blue eyes and a
veritable bottomless pit of energy. He was taller than
Kerryn was, and older, but not much. Kerryn must look like
such a little boy to this powerhouse. Kerryn wasn't quite as
tall, and he was younger in age, but his body wasn't. Kerryn
was more cautious than Ramon, and the two would balance
themselves out well.

"C'mon, lets go eat and then figure out what next."

"Sounds good to me." And they both entered the common areas
for food and beverages.

Ramon started. "So, you have a Zephyr D?" And the
conversation devolved into engineering-speak for a long
time. Kerryn could really open up to this boy, and finding
out the same with Ramon the basis for friendship was quickly
cemented.

When they finally took a break, they realized that it was
only an hour short of the start of the school day. Ramon
shook his head ruefully.

"Not how I expected to spend the first night of the mixer,
but this was far better."

Kerryn felt terrible. "I'm really sorry about that."

"I wasn't going anyway." And a look of longing passed over
him. Kerryn couldn't help it. He did a light scan on Ramon.
What was there amazed him. Ramon was very horny; so horny it
was right on the surface. And he wasn't thinking of girls
either. He was thinking of Kerryn.

Sensuality flooded through Kerryn. He decided to come out to
Ramon. It would be right. "Ramon, you've been great. But
I've got to share something with you. It's really personal.
But you'll find out anyway, and I'd rather do it this way."

"OK, shoot."

"Well, I'm gay." There, he had said it.

Ramon's jaw dropped. "You're joking, aren't you? How did you
figure me out? This isn't funny, you know."

"No, no, no, I'm serious. I really am gay. It sounds like
you are too?"

Ramon nodded. "Yes."

"I'm glad. I thought I might be the only one."

Ramon shook his head. "There aren't many."

"Well, anyway now you know. If you need help or get bogged
down in maintenance, let me know. I'd love to help."

"You got it, dude!"

They grinned, and then Kerryn stretched. "Today's gonna
hurt." So they stopped and got coffee. Kerryn returned to
his room to find his roommates sprawled everywhere and the
blankets still up. One girl came trotting out of the
bathroom, waved at Kerryn and blew him a kiss, and then that
was it. At least they had not violated his bed. So he
showered, changed, and was one of the few on time for
breakfast and the start of class.

Kerryn saw Illiar at breakfast. Illiar caught sight of him
too, and came over to sit with him.

"When did you get your license?"

"Illiar, I don't want to argue."

"When did you get it?"

"On my birthday. You have to be fourteen in order to get the
license."

Illiar looked up table, and Kerryn saw the hickey on the
side of his neck. So. He had kind of expected it by now.

"Have a good night?"

Illiar answered without thinking. "The best! Three times,
and she was so tight I could feel everything." He then
realized who he was talking to, and looked down. "Sorry
about that."

"You're straight now, Illiar. Nothing wrong with that."

"And you aren't."

"Nope."

They were quiet and finished their breakfast. Finally Illiar
said, "I'm sorry, Kerryn."

"S'OK."

"So how was your night?"

"Better than expected. The head tech called someone to put
me up, but we ended up talking tech all night."

Illiar couldn't stand it. "Why are you talking to the techs?
Don't you want to fly?"

Kerryn stood up. "In case you didn't notice, I have a
permit. I have a dozen tech certifications. I am a tech AND
a flyer. That makes me a boonie, remember?" Perhaps a little
too loudly, but the words echoed down the table and heads
turned. Softer, Kerryn continued. "I didn't want to argue,
remember?"

He left the table with his tray, and made his way to class.
Once there, he sat down and got ready, only to be joined by
Thomas, Mike, and the others from his room. Mike started.

"You didn't come back last night. Good time?"

"Sort of. No, I didn't get laid, but I found someone to hang
out with all night so as not to disturb you all."

Thomas spoke. "That was really great of you, Kerryn. You
didn't have to do that."

Kerryn shrugged. Mike spoke up again. "Actually, we saw you
have another argument with the same one as this morning, and
then you went into the FQ corridor and it let you in. How
did you do that?"

"I've got a flight permit. I was qualified on my Turian, and
have the permit on the implant. The Guild advisor told me
not to tell anyone, but I was so mad at Illiar that I just
needed to escape. That was the place he could not follow."

"Wow. Way cool." Agreement from the others.

"You may as well hear it from me before it goes around, but
I also have a lot of tech experience `cause I'm a boonie.
I'm used to roughing it and doing my own repairs and
maintenance. Illiar has a problem with that."

They were silent. Then it was Mike who spoke. "Boonie or no,
you've got a permit and you were the captain of Team Three.
I checked. Maybe we all should be boonies." That drew a
laugh.

Thomas was kind of quiet. "Well, what makes you a boonie
anyway?"

Kerryn laughed. "A lot, actually. Can you take the truth?"
They nodded. "Well, I've spent nearly all my time on the
past nine years on a light freighter with no voice response
units, no turbolifts, and just me and my dad. Our first
night? Thomas, you dimmed the lights. I had no idea where
the wall controls were, and voice activation never occurred
to me. The biggest reason I didn't go to the mixer was
because I had no formal wear. I just didn't bring any."

Mike laughed. "You're kidding, right? None of us brought
any. We had it replicated."

Kerryn shook his head. "Of course. That was stupid. We only
use the replicator for food. Clothes and stuff we buy on
station."

Thomas was awed. "So that's what being a boonie is like?
Doing without?"

"And conserving everything you have. Most of my social life
was over subspace."

"Shit."

Kerryn continued, "So please pardon my occasional weirdness
and abnormality, because I just haven't seen the wonders of
technology before."

"HA!" That came from one of the others. "Apparently boonies
also are good at sarcasm."

"I hope you all are OK with it. Seriously."

They nodded. But it was Mike who commented, "Well, then with
all that tech, you will probably whip our asses in your
ship."

"Not yet, that's for sure. I almost hit a bulkhead on my
last landing."

Class resumed and Kerryn felt better than before.

By the end of the second week, all could fly tethered.
Kerryn was still the only one who could fly independent, and
he did not flaunt that capability. Rather, if he wasn't
working tech with Ramon he would go to the hangar, take out
his trainer and fly on his own. He racked up flight hours
faster than any student on the school. But he still only
casually interacted with his peers.

Ramon, of course was different. He nearly cried when Kerryn
took him to show him the Turian Zephyr D. And when Kerryn
flew it together, packing in the lanky Ramon in the jump
seat behind him, it was extreme pleasure for the tech and
flyer both to share the experience.

Performance ratings were not discussed, but the first break
came in the form of a long weekend. Nearly all the boys went
off for the break, but a couple stayed behind. Of course,
they were all ones who either could not afford to go off-
school, or whose parents were too far away to pick them up.
Kerryn was in that category, and he had known it ahead of
time. Ramon too.

Kerryn watched from a distance as Illiar was transported
back to his parent's ship. They actually had a transporter.
Sure, it was easy, but it took a lot of power.

"Kerryn." That made him jump a mile. It was Thomas, his
roommate. "You OK?"

"Yes, thanks."

"Will you be honest with me? Just between us?"

Where was this coming from? "OK, within limits."

Thomas looked straight on at him. "Are you gay?"

Kerryn looked off into the hangar. Thomas had never treated
him with anything but respect. "Yes, I am afraid I am."

Thomas looked relieved. "Good. My family is full of
psychologists, and some of that rubs off. You hide it really
well. But did something go wrong between you and Illiar?"

Kerryn nodded a little. "Sort of. But it wasn't the gay
thing. It is the boonie thing."

"You haven't asked whether I am."

"It's none of my business, really." He glanced at Thomas,
looked at his meticulous hair, well manicured hands, and
said, "Are you?"

Thomas nodded. "Yes. But I've got my true love already, and
he and his family will be here soon. Kerryn, you're doing
great. I've found that I can be gay without making it an
issue. You can be true to yourself without hiding it. You
just have to reveal yourself to the right people."

Kerryn smiled. "Thanks, Thomas. That makes a lot of sense.
And have a wonderful weekend, OK?"

"You too." He leaned forward. "I think you and Ramon, your
tech friend, could work out very well. Don't ignore him.
Even I can tell that he is nice." And Thomas wandered off to
the transport site in response to a signal, and beamed out
as well.

That was the last of his roommates. The suite was all to
himself. He and Ramon were having dinner together tonight,
and then had decided to find out how much they could drink.
Kerryn didn't even know if they were serious about it, but
hey! Why not?

He found Ramon, and they had some good laughs walking
through the mall area. They stopped at a bar, and
automatically now Kerryn ordered bourbon. Ramon ordered the
age-old rum and coke. They would drink, chat, pay, leave
walk around a bit, and then come back and have another.

Two hours later and five rounds each, they were walking
through the mall when Ramon just looked at Kerryn.

"I've got to sit." So they found a bench.

"I feel so incredible." Kerryn spoke slowly and precisely.

"I know what y'mean." And then he giggled. "Even my cock is
hard."

"Mine too." Kerryn couldn't stop that. "I wonder why."

"Maybe `cause I turn you on."

"Maybe you are right."

A moment of silence. Ramon then ventured, "You do turn me
on, Kerryn. Lots."

This was it. It had taken drink to break through. Kerryn
caught Ramon's eyes, and said, "All my roommates are gone.
Why don't we go back to my suite and I will show you just
how much you turn me on."

"Oh god, Kerryn, let's go." And they got up, and walked a
little erratically back to Kerryn's suite. On the way,
Kerryn was very attuned to the young man next to him. He was
older, but both were at the same age level. His body was
nice. Kerryn could tell through the shirt as they leaned
waiting for the turbolift. Once inside, Kerryn couldn't
resist and pulled Ramon to him, just to hold.

But Ramon had other ideas. He leaned forward and their
mouths made contact, along with a shared long groan between
them. Ramon had very agile hands, and they wasted no time
getting to Kerryn's chest.

The turbolift doors whooshed open, and they made their way
to the suite. They encountered no one on the way, but that
wouldn't have mattered. The door closed, and privacy was
theirs. And after some very intense kissing, Ramon pulled
off and they looked at each other.

"I feel so good right now, Kerryn."

"Me too." And after lying down in the bed, fully dressed,
Ramon passed out. Kerryn had enough awareness to kick his
shoes off and then he was lost in drunken slumber as well.

Morning came. Kerryn's eyes opened slowly to a killer
headache. Short light-blond hair was in front of him, as
well as the bare skin of a neck and some ear lobes. Despite
the headache, Kerryn grinned as he snuggled closer to the
boy in front of him.

"Mmm." That was from Ramon. "My head fucking hurts."

"Mine too."

They lay peacefully, but in that aching irritation that
comes from a hangover. Finally, Ramon had to get up.
"Where's the bathroom?"

"Over there."

He got up and disappeared. Kerryn sat up as well, smiling
anyway. He made his way to the replicator and said, "Water,
sixteen ounces, cold, two servings." A whirr, and two ice
water glasses appeared. He started on his, and handed one
wordlessly to Ramon.

"My dad said to drink as much water as you could before
going to bed after drinking alcohol. Maybe it will help."

It did. They grinned at one another. "Kerryn, was last night
real? Did we really make out like forever and then sleep
together?"

"Yup. It was amazingly real for me." Kerryn had known it was
right for him. "It was right, Ramon. It was right between
us."

Shyly, Ramon nodded. "I think so too." He looked at Kerryn,
his blue eyes a little wide and a little vulnerable. "It's a
little weird, you know. It isn't like tech at all. I'm
guessing, and feeling, and I'm so unsure about it. It's not
like, constant, you know? There's no theory, no equation."

Kerryn nodded. "You're right. We can't predict the outcome
based on the process." His eyes grew a little wistful, and
Ramon could see a buried hurt there. "My best friend, I
thought he might be the one a while back. But he changed,
and I don't like what he has become, or maybe the revelation
of what he really was. He and I more or less discovered that
we liked boys together. Trouble is, he went straight and I
stayed gay. I'm scared, Ramon. I loved last night, I loved
waking up next to you. I'm just kind of feeling my way along
too." He stared into Ramon's eyes. "I think that is the way
it is supposed to be."

Ramon's smile returned. "You're right. And don't be scared.
I loved it too, and I think we should give this every chance
we can. We can find ways to be together."

"We can always escape on the Turian."

"You bet!" And then as if not quite sure, Ramon asked, "I
want this. Do you?"

Kerryn felt it reverberate in his heart and soul. "Yes,
Ramon, I want this very much. More than flight school, I
think."

Ramon yawned, and it was contagious. "You've just out-deeped
me. I need to freshen up. Meet you in the cafeteria in half
an hour?"

"Yes, sir!"

Moving slowly, they separated, and each started their
morning routine. Kerryn felt elated once the headache eased.
And at breakfast, they were again friends, but each knew
there was more to it than that.

Ramon and Kerryn spent every hour that break together. Not
drinking, although they did go back and try only one or two,
but watching vids, checking out the larger ships, and
tinkering with the craft that Ramon needed to tune up. The
head tech smiled knowingly, and commented that the trainer
fleet never looked so good.

Break ended, and school resumed. Thomas had quirked his
eyebrows at Kerryn, who grinned back impishly, and nothing
more was exchanged there. The next two months were a hard
push to get operational on several different ship classes,
including shuttles, escorts, and other freight-handling
craft. On this there was a level playing field, and Kerryn
took his share of problems. Shuttles were boring. Escorts,
the equivalent of tugboats, were only a little better. It
took some finesse to land a freight carrier with an escort.
Kerryn got the most fun out of the survey ships, partly
because they were so agile and sensitive but also because
they let the pilot inspect and examine all the exterior
features of the larger ships. Kerryn spent hours out on
these, and achieved the best rating possible in that class.
Everyone else thought it was dismal work.

He saw Illiar several times. Illiar, who tended to
overcorrect his piloting still, had just achieved the lowest
allowable rating on the survey class. He had exited his ship
with a look of disgust, and the instructor sighed.

"Blue One, you have now achieved the Acceptable performance
on this craft."

"Thanks. Hope I never have to see one of those again." And
he sauntered off. Kerryn was amazed at the change in his
friend. He decided that at the next opportunity, he would
corner him and ask.

That came later that day. Illiar was having lunch, and
Kerryn went over to sit with him.

"Hey Illiar. How are you doing?"

Illiar looked up, a look of distain crossing his face.
Kerryn raised his eyebrows, and the look melted. He was the
old Illiar again.

"Oh hi, Kerryn. I'm ok. You?"

"Good." He decided to get to the point. "You've changed.
I've never seen you hostile to anyone, and now that's all I
see. What happened?"

"Nothing happened."

"Bullshit. That's not the guy talking who helped me build
forty-eight tiers of interlocking blocks for a fortress we
would play in for an hour after that."

Illiar stared at him, and then laughed a little. "Maybe
you're right. Let's talk about it, but not now, OK?"

Kerryn nodded. "All right." He ate some, and then continued,
"How are your quals?"

"I got my last today on those surveyors. You?"

"I have them all too. Shuttles are so boring."

"You can say that again."

They finished with some small chat, and then Kerryn saw
Ramon come in. Panic was spread across Ramon's face, and his
hands were visibly shaking. Kerryn excused himself, and went
over to Ramon.

"What is it?" He took his tray, and set it down. "What's
going on?"

Ramon started shuddering. "There's been an accident. One of
the shuttle nacelles blew. Bobby got it on the right arm.
He's going to be fine after a week, but they won't say what
happened." Haunted eyes turned to Kerryn. "It was one of the
ones we did. I know that nacelle was fine a week ago. But
what if we missed something? I just can't remember! It's
ripping me apart."

Kerryn decided right there. "Ramon, do you trust me?"

Ramon stared at him. "Trust you?"

"I can help find the memory. But you have to trust me."

Ramon nodded. "You more than anybody."

Kerryn slipped into his mind, and Ramon hissed in shock.
Memories riffled back until Ramon muttered, "That's the
one." Kerryn walked him through the procedure, and the
visuals from the nacelle were all in perfect order. The
memory continued over the rest of that shuttle, and
surprisingly into the little kiss that followed before
Kerryn stopped.

Ramon had stopped shaking. "It wasn't my fault. We did it
right. Oh god, Kerryn, if I had messed up it would ruin me!
Techs are supposed to be flawless. We didn't see a problem.
It wasn't there when we did it." Ramon had calmed down a
little, and then looked at Kerryn suspiciously. "Now, how
did you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Sift through and find my memories like that. I could feel
you there."

Kerryn smiled. "Don't freak, OK?"

"No, not OK. I will freak if I want to. How the fuck did you
do it?"

"I'm half Betazoid. It's in my genes, and I've had
training."

Ramon stared at him. "You're half Betazoid? And you didn't
tell me?"

Gently, Kerryn replied, "You didn't ask, you know." He
looked around, and no one was watching them quite yet. "You
aren't going to freak, are you?"

Ramon took a deep breath. "No, I don't think so. When were
you gonna tell me, huh?"

"When we were a little closer. It's not a bad thing, you
know. And I haven't gone into you like that before. I keep
my distance in my mind."

Ramon was slowly calming down. "This has been a hell of a
day." He quirked again, and then said, "OK, tell me what I
am thinking."

"OK." Kerryn dipped into his mind, and caught an image of
the head tech wearing a multicolored toga. "Well, I don't
think that toga would suit him."

"Shit, you can do it." Ramon grinned suddenly, and pointed
over at another student. "What's he thinking about?"

Kerryn shook his head. "Ethics, dude."

Ramon nodded. "Good answer." His face settled into a very
serious pose. "Dude, love, keep your distance with me unless
we agree on it, OK? Privacy is really important to a boonie
tech like me."

Kerryn nodded. "You've got my word, and promise on that."
And then he asked the question that Ramon had just
triggered. "Do you really love me? Really?"

Totally impassive for a moment, and then melting into a
gentle smile. "Yes, Kerryn, I love you."

"I love you too, Ramon."

Each knew that a kiss would betray them, so Kerryn
whispered, "Settle for a high-five?"

"You got it." And they reached up and high-fived each other,
grinned and Ramon finished his lunch.

Totentanz stopped by later that week, and Kerryn had the
enjoyment of showing Doryn around in the evening. He, his
father, Ramon, and the head tech had a pleasant time in the
FQ bar, and Doryn was amazed at how mature and successful
his son had become. Of course the conversation devolved into
tech talk, and Doryn was left out of some of it, but the
manly way that Kerryn would toss down Bourbon and laugh gave
him such pride.

Of course, they went out to Totentanz, found a dozen small
problems, fixed them, and Kerryn showed off his Romulan
interaction with the warp core. Doryn presented Kerryn with
a precious item for this visit: a Turian-sized micro-warp
drive. With proper installation in the expansion bay, power
routing, and controls, the little Turian Zephyr could
achieve Warp 2. And so Ramon and Kerryn spent all their
spare time doing the upgrade. Kerryn had the head tech
examine it just to be sure, and the head tech congratulated
them on a perfect installation.

It was no surprise that the maiden flight of the warp drive
was perfect, except for one thing. The range on Kerryn's
implant would handle several days of sublight travel, but at
Warp 1 in seconds he was out of Flight School range. When he
returned after only two minutes of flight, he was ordered to
land immediately.

Grinning, Kerryn executed a perfect landing in the hangar,
shut down the Zephyr and climbed out of the cockpit to find
himself standing in front of the head tech, the Flight
Commander, and the Station Commander. Uh oh. Or more likely,
oh crap.

"Sirs?"

The head tech was grinning. The Flight Commander spoke
first.

"Your implant tracer went off scope for two minutes. The
station is in an uproar. Please explain yourself."

Kerryn was confused. "I don't understand, sir. This is my
vessel, a Turian Zephyr. I am qualified to fly independently
on it. Since I was staying within the same parsec, there was
no requirement to file a flight plan."

"Your implant!" Kerryn held up his arm, and the Flight
Commander scanned it. His eyes popped wide open.

The head tech commented to the Station Commander, "As I told
you."

The Station Commander nodded. "Gold Four, how is it that you
are warp capable in a Turian?"

So Kerryn explained the installation of the micro-warp
drive. He showed the Station Commander and Flight Commander
the adaptations and installations. He powered up the system
and showed them the performance profiles.

The Flight Commander looked at the other two. "I'm lost. Do
you get it?"

The head tech nodded. "Not only do I get it, I inspected it
at his request before flight. It is expertly done."

The Station Commander nodded too. "It has been many years,
but from what I can tell, I agree. There is no safety risk,
and no violation of procedures. We seem to have assumed that
none of our flight students would be able to manage a warp-
capable ship. Especially a Turian Zephyr D, if I am not
mistaken?"

Kerryn nodded. "Yes, sir."

"Formidable work, Gold Four. Even now, you are a person to
be reckoned with." He turned stern. "Don't let it go to your
head." The Station Commander turned to the others. "Cancel
the alert. Amend procedures so that all warp-capable student
assets must file a flight plan before departure." And with
their agreement, they turned and departed.

Kerryn started shaking. Formidable? Him? He was fourteen.
Crap. But he had done nothing wrong other than to catch the
station off guard. And that was an accident! He went over
and sat down on a lift, to settle down.

One of the techs came over with coffee. "Here. We heard it
all. Jeez, you got them riled!"

"How riled?"

"Riled enough for a yellow alert, and an all-persons report
as to your whereabouts."

"Oh fuck. Ramon knew where I was going." The shaking had
returned briefly.

"He probably told the head tech."

Kerryn drained the coffee. "Thanks, but I needed something a
lot stronger than this."

"Next time you are in the bar, I guarantee you someone will
buy you a drink. This NEVER happens."

Ramon made sure he was OK when he saw him. His roommates
pounced on him and wanted to know what happened. Rumor flew
for the rest of it. But within a couple of days, it had
settled down.

Ratings were published, and Kerryn was up there. Not the
best, but in the top ten. That guaranteed a position in War
School. Illiar had also now almost made it up there, and
while he was happy for his friend, he didn't think Illiar
had the right temperament for war.

Ramon and Kerryn were in the bar again when suddenly things
got suspiciously subdued. Kerryn glanced out the side of his
vision and saw none other than the Station Commander there,
looking for someone. He was in casual clothes, and it was
obvious that the respect of the man was commanded by his
presence. If he had been in uniform, everyone would be at
attention.

Kerryn knew when the eyes landed on him, and sighed. "Ramon,
don't freak, but the Station Commander is on his way over."
Ramon nodded quickly, but Kerryn could see him torque up.
And then he was on Kerryn's right side.

"Gold Four?"

Kerryn turned, and nodded. "Yes, sir." And then on impulse,
he gestured to the chair. "Would you like to join us?"

The gentleman smiled, and could recognize when a student was
buffering for another one. But why not? "For a few moments.
But then I have to go watch the mixer." He looked at
Kerryn's clothes. "Most students enjoy the mixers. You
haven't been to one."

Kerryn nodded, surprised. "No, sir. They are a bit too
eclectic for me, and Ramon too, so we usually drink and talk
tech instead, sir."

The commander's eyes flicked to Ramon, who had calmed down
and gained some poise. He was amazed at how cool Kerryn was.
"Sounds like you think of yourselves as boonies."

Defiance rose, but politely Kerryn nodded. "Yes, sir."

The commander stopped and shook his head. "Well, the mixers
serve a purpose more than getting laid, you know." Kerryn's
eyebrows raised high, and Ramon gulped. "Social skills are
important, and while I have no complaints after talking to
you, Ramon here could use some socialization. I suggest that
it would be a very good idea for you two to go to the mixer,
and at least talk tech there. You can also watch our pride
and joy make complete asses of themselves if you want also.
This bar," he gestured around, "is a great place to be. But
not always."

Kerryn heard an implied order. "Sir, thank you for your
guidance. We'll see you there."

"Good answer. Much easier than me ordering you two to go."
And he bade them farewell, and they left.

"OK, Ramon, what do you have that is sexy to wear?"

"Huh?" Ramon was quaking.

"Come on, he's right. If you can't have an off-duty
conversation with your commander, you need more practice.
I'll tell you what. We'll go together, and before each one
we'll come here and get loaded. How's that?"

Ramon laughed. He had such a great laugh, and it was
relatively rare to hear. "Deal. Meet back here ready to
conquer in thirty minutes." They split up and went to
change.

Kerryn knew what he wanted to wear. After all, he was
dressing for Ramon. He had replicated a nice matte dark
brown pants and shirt combination, where the shirt was
longer and more like a tunic. With his long hair, this gave
Kerryn a nice, comfortable feel but the outfit showed off
his body well. The only ornament was a Guild Membership pin
on the collar. He brushed his hair until it hung like rough
silk. And he thought to himself that this was the first time
he had ever actually gone to lengths to make himself
attractive for anyone. He hoped Ramon would like it.

They met back at the bar, Kerryn first. He was well enough
known now among the older regulars that they recognized
someone dressed for an occasion. Whistles echoed through the
bar, and Kerryn grinned and winked in response.

Ramon entered. He looked good in a gray shirt and pants.
Somewhat techno in style, whereas Kerryn was going for
neutral. But when Ramon saw Kerryn, his eyes widened, and he
just stared. Kerryn decided to bail him out.

"Ramon, you look great! Who knew you would clean up so
well?" And Ramon flushed, grinned and joined him.

"Kerryn, you could fuck me now if you wanted to, you look so
incredibly hot."

Kerryn spoke softly. "Someday soon, I promise. But we
usually take our clothes off for that." And that sent Ramon
laughing again.

Two drinks, and then they went to the mixer. That turned out
to be a lot more interesting than they considered. For one
thing, girls kept coming over to them to talk and socialize.
Kerryn had no problem with girls, being truly neutral on the
idea. Ramon remained kind of quiet, until one of them sat on
his lap as a greeting. Kerryn winked at him, and Ramon
laughed and found some skill at bantering.

This puzzled the girls to no end. And so they kept coming
back, although everyone's patience eventually runs out and
it slowed down. It was odd enough to see a flyer and a tech
at the same table, let alone conversational, but to be also
really cute and uninterested? Bizarre.

Qualifying exams were approaching. These were a series of
day-long written and flight tests over a period of several
weeks that were designed to evaluate, certify and grade the
flight students. During the tests, Kerryn and Ramon barely
saw each other as the exams were so intense and continuous.
But all those who passed would come out with a third class
flight license. For Kerryn who already had one, it just
meant extra quals on the different ship classes. Just the
same, he might get an upgrade out of it.

Eight weeks later, the ratings came out, and again Kerryn
was near the top, but not at the top. That was fine by him,
and when he went up for the update on his implant, the
Flight Commander grinned.

"Gold Four, congratulations on excellent performance. Since
you already had a third class license, you earned an
upgrade. More importantly, your upgrade was sufficient for a
first class flight license and certification.
Congratulations, Lieutenant."

Kerryn flushed red with excitement. "Thank you, sir!" And
they handed him his three star pin, which he immediately put
on the left collar tab next to his Guild emblem.

"Before you go, Lieutenant, there is one more thing." The
Head Technician stepped forward, and updated his implant as
well. He handed him a bronze pin as well. "Congratulations,
Master Technician."

Kerryn's jaw dropped. "How is that possible, sir?"

"We techs continually test and evaluate. We have our ways.
Even though you did not enroll in the Tech program, you have
met all its qualifications, as has Ramon too, and when that
is done, rank should not be withheld." He grinned, shook
hands, and then shooed him off.

An hour later, Kerryn stood in front of the mirror in his
new Guild uniform. Brown shirt, brown pants, brown boots,
with an optional brown jacket. Good thing it was brown. The
Guild crest was on his shirt, and he placed the first class
flight pin on the left collar, and the Master Technician pin
on the right collar. He struck a pose in the mirror, and a
sexy young Guild member looked back at him. A mixer tonight,
the bar beforehand with Ramon, and then a month-long break
before Flight resumed.

He hadn't told anyone how that month was being spent. He
intended to tell Ramon tonight if he thought it would go
well. Belay that, Kerryn thought. I'm going to tell him
anyway. I owe him that much.

When he entered the bar, Ramon was there as were some of the
other senior techs. When they saw his two pins, the
deafening roar of approval that took place echoed out into
the mall area. Ramon was speechless for a moment, and then
hearty congratulations abounded.

They looked so good. Lieutenant Kerryn and Master Technician
Ramon. Side by side, grinning. No one knew who started it,
but someone started chanting "Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!" and while
the bar suddenly realized the truth between these two, the
approval and chanting grew and grew.

Ramon looked terrified at Kerryn, and Kerryn just grinned
and looked at Ramon. "What do you think? They're expecting
something."

"KISS!! KISS!! KISS!!"

Ramon nodded. "Just this once." And amid the catcalls and
screaming, they faced each other squarely, smiled, came
closer, and just briefly brushed their lips against each
other. Breaking contact, their eyes squarely looking into
each other among the applause, Kerryn felt the sizzle of the
only time he ever would feel the unique feeling of first
true love.

He said the words. "Imzadi, I love you."

Ramon flushed bright red, and they clung together briefly,
and then each had to have a drink after that. Four later and
quite merry, they sailed into the mixer with grins on their
faces.

One would almost call it an anachronism. This mixer had more
formality than any other, in that all the newly licensed
flyers and techs were strutting around in new uniforms. It
wasn't quite as much about getting laid as it was showing
off. But that only lasted an hour or so, and then it was
back to finding someone to get laid with.

Thomas and Mike, Kerryn's roommates noticed Kerryn enter
with Ramon. Thomas grinned, and Mike made a curious noise.

"Jeez, Thomas, you'd think they were dating or something."

Thomas decided to let him in on it. "Dude, they are.
Where've you been?"

"Shit. Look, he made First Class. And a Master Technician!"
Mike was awed. "He's incredible that way."

Thomas nodded. "Yeah. If only he would loosen up a little.
He's going to be miserable if he can't relax."

Mike saw the truth in that. "You're right." He grinned.
"Come on, we owe him his recognition."

There were many congratulations among all the students.
Kerryn was generally liked among those few who knew him, but
no one could fault his flying. There was only one hurdle to
make it through. Illiar.

Illiar saw Kerryn, and went over to congratulate him. They
had kind of resolved the boonie thing. But when Illiar saw
that Kerryn had made First Class, his feelings were mixed.
Illiar had done well. But this boonie had taken all the
glory.

They finally stood opposite each other. Kerryn saw Illiar's
Third Class pin, smiled and congratulated him. "Illiar, way
to go! You are going to absolutely love the independence. I
am so happy for you."

Illiar fought with words. He wanted to lash out. He wanted
to make some snide remark. But Kerryn had devoted all his
waking moments to this, whereas Illiar had played, gotten
laid, and moved in political circles. Important circles. He
realized that someday he might need an ally in Kerryn, and
Kerryn had done nothing against him. So he bowed somewhat
stiffly, put on a plastic smile and congratulated him on
doing so well.

Kerryn knew it was hard. But Illiar would have to adapt. And
as he watched the sequence go by, he let Illiar come to his
conclusion, and all was well enough.

Much later, Kerryn and Ramon sat at a table in relative
quiet. Kerryn was dreading bringing up the next topic, but
fortunately Ramon was observant enough to know something was
bothering his love.

"OK, little boy, what is it?"

Kerryn rolled his eyes. "It's Lieutenant Little Boy to you."

"Sure it is. What's up?"

Go ahead, Kerryn thought. "Well, we have a month off. You're
going home for the time."

"Yup. I'm going to miss you."

"I am going to miss you. But I'm going to be really busy."

"Oh? Totentanz have that many problems?"

Kerryn shook his head. "No. I'm going to take a series of
qualifying exams during most of the month."

Ramon picked his head up in interest. "Oh? With who?"

"Starfleet."

Ramon looked at him, dumbfounded. "Starfleet? As in the
Academy?"

"Yes, although I have prepared to test out of the Academy."

"Why?"

Kerryn looked away. "My dad and I have discussed it for
years. It is every pilot's dream, in a way. Big ships,
latest technology. Not scrounging around like I do for
Totentanz. Not having to worry about money."

Ramon was silent. Then, he said in a small voice, "Starfleet
is what everyone hopes for someday. I knew you and I might
be hired in different places, but somehow we could make it
work. Would Starfleet allow that?"

Kerryn nodded. "There's a lot of crossover between the Guild
and Starfleet."

Ramon sat there. "Well, you will come back for me?"

"Oh god, Ramon, I won't go into Starfleet if I can't have
you near me!"

They just held hands for a moment, and then Ramon nodded.
"You have to try, and we will find a way to be together."
And before it turned into more, they exited the mixer and
went to Ramon's rooms for some intensely physical sharing
and support. They as yet had not made it past really intense
kissing and stroking, and there was no need tonight. They
fell asleep together, half-naked in Ramon's bed.

The following morning, Lieutenant Kerryn escorted Master
Technician Ramon to his waiting ship, meeting his parents
and seeing him off. And then, raising the implant for hangar
access, he strode confidently across the huge hangar towards
the little Turian Zephyr D in full sight of the remaining
class, filed his flight plan, and gracefully launched from
the hangar out into space before going into warp for his
rendez-vous with the Totentanz. He was fourteen, and so far
a walking success story, and of course, a boonie.

Doryn was bursting with pride, and together they spent a
week going through the Starfleet EPU. Kerryn had completed
the program, but wanted to refresh it from his new
perspective. It might help him glean a few insights. And it
filled the time until the handoff.

Finally, Totentanz arrived at the handoff point. The USS
Lexington, a Federation starship would be meeting them there
to pick Kerryn up for the external exam meetings. It had
cost them a thousand credits, but once that exam fee was
paid, it was up to Starfleet to collect, test, and redeliver
the candidate. So, for Totentanz in the middle of its cargo
flight, Kerryn would depart in the Turian Zephyr and meet
the Lexington nearby.

Kerryn was ready. He lifted the little Turian out of the
hangar, waggled his wings in farewell, and went to warp. It
would be about forty minutes. During that time, he thought
carefully about Ramon, and the Guild. Was Starfleet reaching
too far? His success in the Guild seemed ensured. His
thoughts continued to run deep until he was hailed.

"Turian Zephyr, this is the USS Lexington."

"Lexington, acknowledged. ETA is two minutes. Please secure
your hangar to receive me."

"Very good. Here are the coordinates."

"Thanks."

Kerryn saw the ship now, and guided her behind the main
section until he matched their velocity vector. The doors
opened, and he eased the little craft in. All stop, magnetic
catches in place, and a system shutdown, and he was there.
He jumped down from the cockpit to be greeted by an Ensign.

"Ensign Dallow, sir. You are?"

"Lieutenant Kerryn of the Freighter Guild, Flight Officer
First Class and Master Technician."

Ensign Dallow seemed unimpressed. "Right this way. All the
students in for the exam are on Deck Ten, which includes the
testing center, the holodeck, and Ten Forward, our main
lounge. You don't have a Starfleet clearance, so you will be
restricted only to Deck Ten without an escort." And he
rattled on with standard information and protocol.

At one point, exiting a turbolift they passed a large
window, and Kerryn stopped to look. It showed the entire
back end of the vessel, the engineering section, and the
nacelles. Clear, clean, pristine. Well-lit. It was like
heaven.

Ensign Dallow coughed politely. He loved doing this. The
boonies always loved this view.

He entered his quarters, to get settled. Ensign Dallow gave
him a communicator and had one more comment for him.

"Lieutenant, we have one final piece of advice on the
testing. For this exercise all your simulations will be
using a Soyuz-class starship. You have about twelve hours
before the tests begin, and often it helps to review the
class."

Kerryn nodded. "Soyuz A or A Plus?"

Dallow grinned. No one had ever asked him that before. This
one would do well. "A Plus." And the door closed.

Kerryn was in awe. A real starship, larger than any he had
been on before. Self-opening doors, crew running around busy
with tasks, unlimited replicator use, and no money!
Everything was free! Well, that wasn't quite true, but it
was much less focused on monetary values. His hand caressed
the walls and furnishings around him. Oh yeah, voice
activation.

"Computer."

Chirp.

"Dim lights to seventy percent."

Chirp. The lights went down a bit. Less harsh, a warmer
feeling. Slowly he began to immerse himself in this
environment. He called up a deck ten outline, found where
everything was, and then went out and wandered the deck. He
could easily get lost except that this was he - he never got
lost in space. And so with curiosity he entered the lounge
at Ten Forward.

Wow. It was like a nightclub. Tables scattered around, quiet
music in the background. Very much out of the element for
him. This wasn't a freighter bar. Many officers in uniform.
Quiet discussions, occasional laughter.

"Here for the exams?" Kerryn turned to find an older officer
addressing him. He nodded mutely.

"Well, best of luck. It's open seating, and synthehol is
available at the bar."

Without thinking, Kerryn asked, "Any real alcohol?"

Surprised, the officer shrugged. "There's always something."

Kerryn took a seat at a small table. He stared out into
space, the star field streaming by. He was very far from
home, and very alone. Suddenly, he wished he were anywhere
other than on the Lexington. Ramon was very far away.

"No panicking." Someone had sat down with him. It was an
ensign, young, and female. She smiled at him. "Sorry, but I
could see it building. You must be from far out of
Federation space?"

"Pretty far. Delvin Six."

She whistled. "Near the Cardassian border, too. Tense area."
She held out her hand. "I'm Maria.You?"

"Kerryn." Apparently they were leaving rank behind.

"You're pretty young for the exams."

Kerryn smiled. "I'm almost fifteen." He regarded her
curiously. "Did you attend the Academy?" When she nodded, he
continued, "What was it like?"

"Wonderful, hard, challenging, thrilling, all those things.
It isn't easy, but it is certainly formative. I grew an
awful lot there." And she went on to describe the
activities, the flight school, and the rest. It would be
like a dream come true.

The doors to the bar opened, and Kerryn glanced back warily,
but only more officers were admitted. Maria noticed this.

"You're a little touchy. Is it that sensitive out by you?"

Kerryn nodded. "Freighter Guild members are ok, but every
door opening could be a business opportunity or a threat."

"Hmm. Starfleet gives us a modicum of security."

They chatted a bit, and Maria grew to respect this kid. He
was years older than he should be. And cute. He would be
gorgeous someday, but right now he was like a puppy that she
wanted to stroke, cuddle and hug. When Kerryn finally began
to relax a little, Maria noticed that his eyes twinkled and
his smile was easier. Maybe he was gorgeous now, she
thought.

"Kerryn, it has been a pleasure. But I'm going to bed. It's
been a long shift."

Kerryn stood. "Good idea. It's been about twenty hours since
I left. Eight to go to the exams. Thanks for joining me."

"You're welcome." She leaned over and kissed his cheek.
"Good luck!" And she left him.

Kerryn went back to his cabin. He took an ultrasonic shower,
which he hated but it got him clean, and he went to bed. His
last thoughts were of the Soyuz A-plus class vessel. Not
bad.

At 0700 Kerryn was admitted to the testing center, for basic
paperwork and the exam selection. He paid his thousand
credits, and checked off all the exams on the list. The exam
coordinator raised his eyebrows, but said nothing. For a
thousand credits, Kerryn would take every exam they had!

Eight hours later, he was exhausted and his fingers were
very stiff. It had been grueling. Engineering was very
tedious but he knew he aced that one. Communications too.
The next set were sixteen hours from now. The examiner
addressed the five candidates.

"On this deck you will find the Holodeck. You may find it
some use in relaxation."

Kerryn got his first look at the other students. He was not
impressed. Three were human, and were older, perhaps in
their twenties. They were obviously friends, and not taking
this very seriously. The fourth was a girl, who on the break
had kept saying, "Admiral Nachayev told me that ." to some
obscure topic, fact or fiction. They were all Federation
members, but apparently not on the regular exam sequence.
That kind of made Kerryn feel even more alone. There were no
other outsiders.

They did try to chat at the lunch break. Kerryn had felt a
little foolish, standing in front of the food replicator as
he asked for Cholyuk Soup. It was a distinctly Romulan dish,
and the Federation system did not recognize it. So he
settled for a chicken sandwich and vegetables. But even
lunch separated Kerryn from the others. He had more than a
year of flight experience, and a lifetime in space. These
four were all planet-bound. They had never flown in anything
smaller than a shuttle, and never piloted anything. The one
thing they had in common was their awe of a starship.

Kerryn thought back to his virtual captaincy as Gold Four.
In hindsight, he had loved it. Maybe he would someday be a
Starfleet captain.

Surprising, the ensign named Maria met him in Ten Forward
that evening. They were much more conversational, and he
opened up to her about feeling awkward as the only outsider.
She sympathized. And then the magic happened.

"So, I hear you flew in on your own. You have your own
ship?"

Kerryn nodded, his eyes lighting up. "Yes. It's a little on
the dated side, but I've got a micro-warp drive installed so
I can hit warp two."

Her eyes lit up. "You know engineering?"

He grinned, straightened, and said, "Lieutenant Kerryn,
Freighter Guild Flight Officer First Class and Master
Technician at your service."

Her jaw dropped. "Wow. Very good, lieutenant."

This was the first girl, no, the first woman, that had
interested Kerryn. "Would you like to see my ship?"

She grinned, and nodded. "Let's go. It's in the shuttle
hangar?"

"Yes." And she escorted him down to the hangar, where the
little Turian was parked.

"Ah, a Turian Zephyr! With some modifications? Very nice.
Much better than the Prevyar crap that they keep selling."

"I see you know your craft. Then come see this. This is a
Zephyr D, the last of five made, and hand signed by Turian
himself!" And together they went over the ship.

Maria kept her objectivity. But this kid knew his stuff if
he could install a micro-warp drive in a Turian. She hoped
that he wouldn't figure out her secret. And so she claimed
fatigue, and they returned to deck ten and she took him back
to his quarters.

Kerryn smiled. "Thanks, Maria. You didn't have to listen to
all that."

She shook her head. "No, but I enjoyed it immensely. I'll
see you tomorrow." And the door closed.

Kerryn went to bed. But his thoughts were of Maria.

Kerryn was the only candidate being tested the next two
days. Ambassadorial took nearly the entire second day, and
included a holodeck simulation of an encounter. That had
blown his mind, as the holodeck was so incredibly lifelike.
He could smell the stench of the race he was negotiating
with, but was able to hold his composure. But his Betazoid
skills did not help with a hologram.

Cultural Qualifying wasn't too bad, although it was short.
Vulcans, Klingons, Ferengi, the other Federation races he
could keep track of. Too bad Romulans weren't in the exam.

Science Qualifying took the third day. That wiped him out.
Engineering science was one thing, but life science was
nasty. He knew he couldn't remember the reproductive habits
of the Hoorta, but he had no problem with the Andorians.

At the end of the third day he found the holodeck empty as
he passed it. Curious, he entered to find the lined black
and white grid around him. Hmm.

"Computer."

Chirp.

"Set to evening, planet Betazed, middle latitudes near the
ocean."

"Program complete." And swoosh, a warm breeze blew over him
as he stood in the orange fading daylight with the purple
waves gliding on the white sand. A pristine city was nearby,
and the air was warm and sweet.

He stood there, just absorbing the amazing feeling and yet
knowing it wasn't real. But suddenly to his left, the arch
appeared and the door opened. The girl came in with one of
the boys, both from the testing center. They were giggling
together, and didn't notice Kerryn for a few seconds.

"Oh! I'm sorry, did we interrupt?"

Kerryn knew the look. They were here to fuck. Bitterness
rose in him, but he graciously shook his head. "No, I was
just leaving. End Program." And the grid returned.

"It was beautiful! Where was it?"

"My mother's home planet. I'd never visited it before. Good
bye, now." And Kerryn left.

He was frustrated. Didn't they take these exams seriously?
Was Starfleet to be blown off like this? Angry, he was on
his way to Ten Forward when he saw Maria. The coincidence
never hit him.

"Going somewhere? Looks like you had a bad day."

In the hall? Why not. He sighed. "I was on the holodeck, in
a very special place. Two of the other students came in
unannounced looking for a place to fuck, and didn't notice
me until it was stupid." Sheepish now, he continued. "I was
so tired, I just wanted a little peace and wonder, and they
ruined it, so I let them have it."

Maria could see the agitation. "Come with me. There's
another holodeck on deck twelve." And she brought him down
to it, and followed him in.

"Go ahead. Where were you?"

"Computer."

Chirp.

"Set to evening, planet Betazed, middle latitudes near the
ocean."

"Program complete." The swoosh, and it was all back again.

Maria exclaimed, "It's beautiful!"

Kerryn could talk to Maria. "It's my mother's home planet.
She left my dad and I when I was almost five years old. She
was claustrophobic, and had to return home or go insane." He
stared into the ocean mist and the darkening sky. "I could
help her remember places like this, where it was open and
beautiful, and it would ease the feeling, but near the end
there was nothing I could do." He turned to her. "We don't
have holodecks, and it is likely I'll never visit Betazed,
so this is the next best thing."

"I'm sorry."

"S'OK. Was a long time ago."

They stood and watched night fall. Maria tucked her arm in
his. She was only a very small bit shorter than Kerryn. "I
like this."

"So do I." And ripples of sensation propagated through his
body.

Some time later, he yawned, and they laughed. "Time to go.
Computer!"

"Wait." Maria stopped him. "Computer. Save program as Maria
Four."

Chirp.

He looked at her, and she grinned impishly back. "I liked
it. It's a great place for making out, you know."

"End program." And the grid returned, and they exited.
Kerryn went to bed, but his thoughts were of Maria.

He woke to find they were in orbit around Earth, and a
message saying that his final three exams, the Commander's
Qualifying and the Crew Qualifying, and the Operational
Qualifying Exams would be administered down on Earth.
Lexington had orders to continue onward, so he climbed into
his Turian and flew down.

Earth bustled with activity. He landed in the largest hangar
he had ever encountered, and settled his ship. He still
loved it. But once in the hangar, an escort was present to
show him to the Academy. A brief walk outside, with the
imposing buildings, the furor of activity and the dramatic
statue of Jonathan Archer daring the Academy enrollees to
adventure onward, it was all intoxicating. He did not need a
room to stay in, as the exams would be over today.

He entered the room, to find the other four already there.
The three boys were relaxed and bantering. The girl was
explaining something with the word Nachayev to the other
escort.

Suddenly, the door opened and four people dressed in black
jumped into the room, firing phasers! Beams crisscrossed
everywhere, and cries of surprise echoed throughout.

Kerryn had heard the doors whisk, and instinctively glanced
at the doors. He saw the first phaser come out, and he flung
himself to the floor with a shout of "GET DOWN!" He slid
quickly behind a table and tipped it over in front of him as
a shield.

Within ten seconds, everyone had stopped firing. The other
four students had red glowing marks on their uniforms where
the simulated phasers had marked them. Kerryn was unmarked.

"OK, your four fail the reaction test. You," pointing at
Kerryn, "you pass with an outstanding. One mark is
acceptable, none is exceptional." The examiner noted down on
a pad. "Carry on."

Kerryn righted the table, and they were admitted to an
identical testing center as on the Lexington. And the Crew
Qualifying Exam began. Hours later, the other candidates
left and Kerryn alone took the Commander's Qualifying exam.
Neither of these were as hard as Science.

He was next escorted up into a high building, and admitted
to a plush office. His escort informed him that Admiral
Nuri, the head of the Academy would be interviewing him. And
seconds later, he stood in the room overlooking the campus
and the flight center nearby, when a short but fit man in a
uniform entered.

"Please sit." And so Kerryn sat, after giving his formal
greeting.

They covered his experiences, his trip out, why he wanted
attend the Academy. Nuri's eyebrows raised a bit when Kerryn
related his flight experiences. His age, though caught
Nuri's curiosity.

"How old are you?"

"Fourteen, sir."

"Bit young for the entrance exams. We normally require a
minimum age of sixteen."

"Sir, I am human with some Betazoid ancestry. That changes
the age profile a bit."

The admiral nodded. "True." He looked at Kerryn shrewdly.
"You've come a long way. Thank you for your interest, and we
will be in contact. I believe your Operations exam is next."

Kerryn nodded. "Thank you for your time, sir."

And there he stood, minutes later, at the entrance to the
simulator. The logo said Soyuz A-plus, just as advertised.
Six people joined him, and introduced themselves. The lead
was a young man named Ensign Holstein.

"Welcome to the Operations Exam. This is actually a subset
of the Commander's Qualifying Exam. You will be the captain
of a Soyuz-class vessel near the Cardassian Neutral Zone.
You will receive a distress call from a freighter. We are
your crew. Rather than worry about names, just call out to
us by our function. Any questions?"

"How was I supposed to prepare for this?"

Holstein grinned. "You can't study for everything." The
doors zinged open, and they marched in and took their
positions.

Kerryn had learned a thing or two. "Ship's status, all
systems." But everything checked out OK. Kerryn sat in the
chair. Any moment now.

He was right. "Communications, sir! A freighter is lost in
the Neutral Zone. She is identified as Kobayashi Maru, and
is signaling distress."

"Helm, set intercept course. Maximum warp."

"Warp five it is, sir. Five minutes to intercept."

Kerryn had a gut feeling. "Signal Yellow Alert." And alert
status was signaled. "Tactical view," and a display came up.
She was deep in the Neutral Zone. This was bad. He began to
swear softly in Romulan.

"Navigation, sir. Sensors are picking up three vessels in
high warp." A pause, then, "Cardassian warships."

"Damn." That was Kerryn again. "Damn fool freighter for
being that deep in the Neutral Zone. No real freighter would
do that." And that raised some eyebrows. "Red Alert. Bring
shields up, bring all weapons online. Maximum warp."

"Do we exceed the Warp Five limitation, sir?"

"Yes. We're in the Neutral Zone now, and outside Federation
space. Get us there now."

It got worse from then on. Three Cardassians against an
antique Soyuz. Still, the Soyuz packed some firepower and
some judicious timing and maneuvering with Kerryn's command
and they had disabled two of the Cardassians, and were in
heated battle with the third. Then the disaster hit.

CLANG, and a shudder. A panicked voice called, "Engineering
to bridge! We've got a Warp Core Breach in progress!. Ninety
seconds until she blows."

Kerryn clung on. "Can you stop it?"

"No way, sir." BONG! "Sir, we just lost the starboard
nacelle! It's been sliced clear off!"

"Damn!" And Kerryn swore violently in Romulan. "Why is it
always the fucking STARBOARD nacelle?" Another direct hit
and half his bridge crew were on the floor. Smoke was
everywhere.

"TACTICAL! What's the state of the target?"

"Heavily damaged. Shields almost gone."

An idea hit him. "Do we have our tractor beam?"

"Yes, but -"

Kerryn pushed him away. "Get out of the way! Go to helm, use
whatever we have in thrusters to get on the far side of the
Cardassian, but up close as you can." He set the weapons on
continuous fire, even though it was pointless. "Engineering!
Full power to the tractor beam NOW!"

"Aye, sir?"

Kerryn set the tractor beam on their detached nacelle. He
would have one chance. It lanced out, and grabbed the
nacelle. And with the entire ship whining in strain, he
swung the tractor beam across their side and released it,
with a prayer and saying, "Take that, asshole!" In Romulan,
of course.

The surviving bridge crew watched their detached nacelle
swing majestically across the space unmolested to score a
direct impact across the engineering section of the
Cardassian. Plasma vented everywhere, and the outer hull of
the Cardassian collapsed. It was going nowhere.

"Warp core breach in twenty seconds!"

Kerryn ran to the stunned Helm operator, pushed him out of
the way, and set full thrusters on to the Cardassian. Shit.
They wouldn't make it in time. Furious, these damned
Cardassians deserve to die and someone might remember the
name Kerryn someday. Go for it all.

"Ten seconds to warp core breach."

Kerryn set course for the Cardassian. They'd at least get a
push and it should be enough.

The Tactical officer stood shakily. "What the hell are you
doing?"

"Forcing a draw." And he engaged Warp One, which shot the
Soyuz A-plus vessel forward just enough so that the warp
core, seconds from exploding on its own, was overtaxed to
push energy out and milliseconds after the thrust, detonated
in a fiery explosion, taking the Cardassian with it at point
blank range.

Or it should have. In reality, the lights went out, and the
Holodeck grid returned with the six crewmen. Kerryn was
breathing hard, grinning with the heat of battle. He looked
up to find the other six crewmen gaping at him.

He knew the freighter survived. But they escorted him out,
and Kerryn saw a row of spectators in a booth behind a
visualization screen. They had watched everything, and they
were staring at him.

Staring.

He had died. He had destroyed the ship. His crew, gone.
There must have been something he missed. Some way out, some
option not played. He failed. The looks from the crew
members had been bad enough, but the spectators staring at
him, that made him miserable. Embarrassed. Shit, how could
he have killed off the whole ship?

They showed him to the bathroom, where he relieved what was
necessary. He washed his face, and looked at his eyes.
Tired. Failed. Too many exams. He couldn't have, shouldn't
have handled it. So much for a promising Starfleet career.

He exited the bathroom to find one person there. Maria. She
looked at him, and smiled.

"So, flyboy, how are you doing?"

He shook his head. "I've had it." Curiosity got him again.
"I thought you were on Lexington."

"No, actually, I am a member of the testing staff. You've
been my assignment."

"Assignment?"

She nodded, not quite matter-of-factly. "Off-duty
assessment."

He stared at her. "And program Maria Four?"

She smiled. "I really did like it, you know."

Something snapped. Too far. Kerryn walked straight over to
her, and stopped right in front of her. "Then perhaps you
should include this in your assessment." And without
waiting, he put his hands on her shoulders and placed his
mouth directly on hers. Hungrily. She melted into him, her
hands creeping up his back and shoulders. But after less
than a minute, he broke the kiss, staring at her with fire
in his eyes.

She grinned back at him. "Full marks on that one."

Defeated, Kerryn let his hands drop. "Whatever. Thanks for
being there. I don't hold your assignment against you. But
I'm done here." And he turned, without looking back he
exited and made his way back to the hangar.

Meanwhile, the evaluation team was in an uproar. All the
Romulan speech had caused them great agitation, because they
didn't know what it meant. Finally they got a translator,
and realized that he was swearing, including certain raucous
comments about the fidelity of the scenario. But by the time
they went to find the young candidate, he had departed the
main hangar and was out of orbit.

Kerryn had found a Guild freighter ten hours away, and by
subspace secured transport for himself and his ship. Ten
hours at Warp Two. With each moment, he felt Starfleet
recede from him. The last simulation was the only thing he
thought he had blown. He would have to see what came out of
it.

When the Guild Freighter Botula picked him up, he paid five
hundred credits plus all the engineering help they needed
until they arrived at Delvin Six. Both Kerryn and the crew
of Botula were pleased with this result, and three days
after arriving at Delvin Six, Totentanz arrived. With tears
in his eyes, and the joy of his home, he settled the little
Turian into its hangar, and went down to greet his father.

Doryn was very happy to have his son back, but was he
different!! Out had gone a little boy to flight school with
his eyes and heart in the stars. What came back was solemn,
downcast and exhausted. Doryn had shaken his head, knowing
now that Starfleet had probably been a bad idea, but the
opportunity had presented itself and Kerryn was ready. Now
his son had gotten a lot taller, had Guild rank and
privilege on his own, and was so much more than the little
toddler who used to race around the decks.

Kerryn just felt the overwhelming comfort of home. Things
were familiar, waiting to receive him without challenge, and
he knew every inch of it. The only thing missing was Ramon.
His dad was his dad, but Ramon was his love, and the more he
realized this the more it struck him. He just wished he
could have finished Starfleet with a positive.

***

Kerryn was shaken out of his link because Jacen was sobbing.
Hours had passed, but a lifetime had flown by. He held Jacen
close until the younger man settled down.

Jacen found words to ask. "How did you get through it?"

"I had to. Like it or not, life goes on. You just endure and
focus on what's next."

"Take me back."

Kerryn hesitated. "Is that such a good idea?"

"Do it. It has been explaining so much about you."

"OK." And they slid back into the continuing thread of life.

***


Kerryn and his father shared a long catch-up period. Kerryn
then announced what he had been planning on the long flight
back.

"Dad, I want to apply for the Ship Master program."

Doryn looked surprised. "You are already a Master
Technician. Ship Master is a long pull."

"I'll be done with Flight in two months. I can do three
months at the school, and the remaining program based from
Delvin Six North, and finish up the last month back at the
school."

Doryn thought it workable, and so while at the Delvin Six
North station, they notified the Guild of the entry and
plan. The Guild Director endorsed the program heartily, and
while Starfleet could think, Kerryn was moving forward.

When he talked with Ramon over subspace, he told him
everything. He told him about Maria, the holodeck, and the
fatal simulation. He told him about the goof-off other
students, and how alone he had felt. Telling it all came
back to haunt him, and after several hours with Ramon he
felt like he had cleared his conscience.

Ramon was intuitive. "Kerryn, you are such a worry-wart. I
am sure you aced everything." He said that for the umpteenth
time.

"Not the sim."

"Did you ever think that the sim might have been a no-win
situation?"

Kerryn thought about that. "No way. None of the Guild sims
do that. What would be the point? Even with the Guild one,
we saved the ship. With Starfleet, the scenario wasn't even
right. No freighter in this world is going to risk being
deep in the CNZ alone, let alone signal distress. Duh. No, I
could only have missed something, probably early on." He put
it out of his mind.

Ramon smiled, and stretched the view a little bit. Kerryn
took a deep breath as the bare skin of Ramon's chest came
into view. "You need to concentrate on what is important."

Kerryn rose to that one, in more ways than one. "Oh god, you
don't know what that's doing to me."

Ramon's eyes lit up. "Really?" He stretched the view a
little more, and Ramon's bare skin was showing from the
waist up. "Wanna know what it is doing to me?" He leaned
forward. "I'm naked."

Sensuality surged through Kerryn. "Y-y-you are? Oh that's so
hot."

"Yup." Ramon moved his hand down, and it suddenly became
obvious that he was stroking his cock. "And it feels so
good, too." He began to breathe a little harder, and
Kerryn's hands went down to his own cock. He dropped his
pants fast. This would not wait.

Meanwhile, Ramon was enjoying a good long wank. Once, Kerryn
saw the tip of his cock cross onto the screen, and that sent
lightning through him. Ramon looked up, saw Kerryn's
enraptured face, and exclaimed "Oh YES!" as he came,
shooting small jets of cum up onto his chest.

That sent Kerryn over the edge and he did likewise. However,
Kerryn wasn't prepared and his cum splattered on the desk
and his leg. One mortified moment, and then the both began
to giggle.

"Oh jeez, Ramon, you looked so fucking hot."

"You too. Intense, almost predatory. I think you are gonna
be one hell of an aggressive top."

"Ha. Back in a moment." And he quickly stepped out of view,
giving Ramon a quick glimpse of his butt in the process,
cleaned up, and dressed again. By the time he returned,
Ramon had done likewise and was in a light shirt.

"One more week, and we're back in school."

Kerryn nodded. "I love Totentanz, but I love you too,
Imzadi."

Ramon looked at him funny. "I looked that up. That's the
Betazoid word for first love, although it is sometimes
called the true love. Am I really that to you?"

Kerryn nodded. "Yes, Ramon, you are."

"Wow. If so," and Ramon looked sly, "we're gonna have to get
us some very private time together. Are you ready for that?"

Kerryn nodded. He had come to that conclusion earlier. "All
the way, dude." A thought occurred to him. Ramon was older.
"Have you ever before?"

A shadow crossed his face, but Ramon nodded. "A number of
times. I know what I am doing. You?"

"No. But I read a lot."

That sent Ramon laughing. "Wow, a virgin! I have so much to
show you."

Kerryn felt tingly inside at that pronouncement. "I most
certainly hope so!" And they finished the call warmly.

One week later, he was back at school, and Ramon returned as
well. The problem was, the techs were sent out on an
internship cruise almost immediately, and Ramon would be
gone for months. But in the seven days before the departure,
Kerryn and Ramon took the adventure into sex.

Two days before he left, they had gone to the bar. They had
had some drinks, and then they had gone back to Ramon's
room. He was lucky in that he had one roommate who had been
firmly told to go sleep somewhere else that night. Ramon and
Kerryn had returned there, merry, and with the lights low
and the door closed, they slipped into each other's arms and
began their ritual of kissing, deeply. Shirtless.

Ramon was taller, and older. He usually started the kisses,
and he wasted no time with Kerryn. It was his hands that set
Kerryn on fire. Hands that caressed his smooth skin,
brushing his nipples on his chest, stroking his neck and
shoulders. Hands that boldly slid down his body, down to his
waist, and then very slowly below and onto his butt. The
groans of pleasure from Kerryn's still high voice fueled
their passion, and when the kiss broke Kerryn buried his
face in Ramon's neck, savoring the skin there. His own hands
had crept onto his love's chest, palms spread flat and
fingers splayed.

Into the older boy's neck, Kerryn whispered, "I am ready for
anything." And with that, Ramon tucked his caressing hands
down inside Kerryn's clothes, over the taut skin of his
butt. Kerryn, not to be outdone, dropped one hand down
across Ramon's stomach, and undid the snap that was binding
Ramon's pants. Deftly, Kerryn slid his hand across the front
to stroke the hard cock that was hiding there.

"Oh god, Kerryn!" And before he could stop it, Kerryn had
dropped to his knees, and was gently pulling his pants all
they way down. "What are you doing?"

A playful grin, and then Kerryn replied, "The best that I
can, of course." And taking a step in to a marvelous new
world, Kerryn covered Ramon's cock with his mouth, and
tongue. Ramon cried out in pleasure as Kerryn put his
fantasy life to use and worked sensational miracles, his
tongue covering the head, snaking down along underneath
until reaching the bottom, and then wrapping itself back
around out to the head again. He alternated his tongue with
straight up and down motion, and little by little he could
taste the elusive flavor of pre-cum on his tongue.

Looking up, Ramon was staring down at him in wonder and
amazement when he suddenly widened his eyes and said, "Dude,
I'm gonna cum!"

Kerryn wanted this, his lover's cum, desperately. Placing
his hands on Ramon's hips, he sped up his ministrations
until Ramon exclaimed as his body went rigid with pleasure,
and began the rhythmic thrusting with orgasm. God, he loved
it as it shot into his mouth. The taste too, but the
knowledge that he had done this for his boyfriend and had
made him feel so good, that gave him the glow of success.

When Ramon was done, they sat down on the bed. Kerryn looked
incredibly smug. Ramon finally returned to normal breathing,
and then revealed the mystery to Kerryn.

"No one ever did that for me before."

Kerryn was surprised. "Really? I thought you had done a lot
of this before."

Ramon shook his head. "I've butt-fucked, but nothing like
that. It must have tasted gross?"

Kerryn shook his head. "No, not bad at all really." He
smiled. "I liked doing it, especially watching you and
knowing that it was because of me that you felt so good."

Ramon stared at him. "That's deep." He smiled. "Thanks,
Kerryn. But I don't think I can do that for you."

Kerryn nodded, though inside he was disappointed.
"Understood." But he reached over, seeing Ramon's cock
slowly hardening, and began to stroke it gently.

"Mmmm, dude that feels so great." Ramon tilted his head, and
as he got back to full hardness, he whispered, "If I'm real
gentle, and we go real slow, can I fuck you?"

Kerryn nodded, slowly. "Oh yes sir."

Ramon grabbed some lube, and positioned Kerryn on the bed on
his back. He lifted Kerryn's legs up, and uncapping the
lube, applied it liberally to his cock. With a little extra
on his finger, he gently pressed his way in Kerryn's tight
pink entrance.

Oooh, that felt good to Kerryn. He closed his eyes. He knew
it would hurt, he knew it would feel superb for Ramon, but
it would be hard for him the first time. But they needed
this intimacy, this experience together. Kerryn needed it.
He needed someone to love him, to want him, and he needed
that someone to fuck him. Now. He was ready. And as he felt
the pressure of entrance from the finger, he sighed and
tried to relax.

The finger removed itself, and he heard Ramon ask one more
time, "Ready?" to which he nodded. Freighter training in
place, he froze his features in a happy look as he felt the
coolness on his butt hole turn to a push, then a stretch,
and finally a stretching burn as Ramon eased his cock in.

"OH GOD KERRYN!" was all Ramon could say, and the burning
grew until tears formed in Kerryn's eyes as the cock of his
lover forever severed his virginity. Wider, stinging, until
he thought it could take no more and Kerryn was about to
stop him when the crown of the head passed, and Ramon
groaned in appreciation. Kerryn felt the muscles ease just a
little, and the pain lessened a bit. He had done the hard
part.

"It's so fucking tight! Oh my god it's so tight!" breathed
Ramon. He just held there, staring at the gorgeous boy whom
he was impaling, staring at the tight little entrance that
was gripping his cock. Kerryn's face was covered in sweat,
and with a tinge of guilt he realized that he had really
hurt this little boy.

A minute passed, and Kerryn felt the transition happen.
Opening his eyes wide to the sensation-ravaged features of
his lover, he wiggled slightly and grinned. "Fuck me,
Imzadi. Fuck me hard. Fuck me like you want to, like there
is no tomorrow, no yesterday, just now. Fuck me!"

Well, with encouragement like that, thought Ramon, he must
be ready. And so he began his stroking, and the slick
pistoning in and out. Kerryn was so incredibly tight that
Ramon could feel the orgasm building again and so he sped up
even faster.

All Kerryn could see was that pleasure seared his lover's
face as he pummeled his butt. But it was fine, and the
filling and emptying sensation was causing him his own waves
of pleasure. With a cry he felt his orgasm hit, and he threw
himself into it, squeezing his butt as tight as it would go
as the jets of cum rocketed out of his own cock and onto his
stomach.

Ramon felt it happen, and slammed his full length into
Kerryn at Kerryn's moment of orgasm, which seconds later was
followed by his own, pumping more cum into the warm and
satisfying inside of his lover. This had been close to the
hottest sex he had ever had. His other friends had all been
experienced, but this time with a virgin who was younger
than himself had been the ultimate thrill.

The moment passed, and Ramon pulled out to lean forward and
kiss Kerryn. Kerryn's cum squelched between them, and that
caused a round of giggles both at the sound and the
sensation. This was new for both of them, and for just a
short moment they played, sliding around in the gooey liquid
before it dried and became annoying.

They took turns cleaning up. A kiss, a smile, and a short
conversation. How else do you end something like this?
Kerryn wanted to stay the night, but he could tell that
Ramon needed privacy, solitude, or something. He was not a
post-coital cuddler.

"Ramon, I loved that."

"So did I. I'm sorry it hurt so much."

"It was worth it. Remember, I've read a lot." That sent them
giggling. "Good night."

"Good night." And Kerryn left to return to his room.

However, it was 0230 when he returned, and Thomas was awake.
Thomas was no dummy, and he caught the slight odor of sex
from Kerryn. Figuring he was new to this, he decided to give
him some advice.

"Kerryn?"

Kerryn jumped. "Thomas! Didn't mean to wake you."

Quiet, then, "Your first time as a bottom?"

Kerryn blushed. "Yes. It was wonderful."

Thomas grinned in the dark. "It takes a while for the
muscles to return to normal. Wait half an hour, take a
shower, then sleep on your stomach and you will be fine in
the morning."

Kerryn realized the sense in this. "Thanks."

Thomas nodded. "I'm happy for you."

Kerryn did as he was told, and in the morning he was sore
but otherwise unaffected. But he had this silly little grin
on for a while, until the rigors of school got back to him.

Ramon spent the rest of his time in orientations, and then
departed. They only had a few minutes, in which Kerryn
wished him the best and told him that he would miss him.
Ramon nodded, his eyes full of emotion that he could not
express. And then he was gone, and the ship was gone.

Kerryn overloaded his class schedule, and pushed ahead. He
continued  to log more flight hours in the different craft
than any other student. When they started training on the
standard Guild fighter craft, Kerryn was ready. It was even
more agile than the Turian, and much more sensitive than the
trainer craft. But all the fliers pushed through the sims,
the flight training, maneuvers, and more. Kerryn was near
the top in performance. But then again, he virtually lived
in the craft, or under it for the tech work.

>From the War School curriculum, he took individual and small
unit tactics. He studied weapons, defensive strategies, and
surveillance. He especially took to reconnaissance, although
there wasn't much use for that. And on a whim, he took
external cultural tactics for both Romulans and Cardassians.
The former might help him with Totentanz if it came to that.
The latter was reality, in that the Cardassians were the
nearest threat to the Guild operations.

Kerryn saw that Illiar had avoided all the small craft
choices, and had gone straight for warship and flotilla.
Kerryn would have to wait for that, if he got to it. It was
pretty far removed from where his preferences were. He
grinned. Admiral was not in his desires, despite his early
childhood precocious position.

He waited for Ramon. No word from him, but that was not
unusual. He realized that he would be back on Totentanz in
another month himself, after having graduated Flight School.
Doryn had already booked him a suite of rooms on the Delvin
Six North station, from whence he could base his study and
ship out for the required internships.  He and Ramon would
have two weeks of overlap. That made him smile. Kerryn's
butt had just itched for another opportunity with Ramon.

Four months is a long time. During that time, Kerryn's voice
finally settled into its light baritone. He grew to his
final height - not tall, not short, but somewhere in the
middle. He started shaving regularly, and his cock seemed to
have a mind of its own.

There was not a single word of communication from Starfleet.
Occasionally this would hit Kerryn, usually just before bed,
when his thoughts drifted to the future. But a cold silence,
like that of infinite space was the only message from
Starfleet.

Dressing for one of the mixers that he now went to, he
looked at himself in the mirror. He was very, very nice.
Kind of wary, but not threatening. But when he smiled, it
was warm and inviting. And each time, he went to the bar,
had two bourbons and talked with the techs who were there,
and then went to the mixer.

He selected a girl, remembering Maria, and made a pleasant
acquaintance. He learned how to do basic dance, and decided
that that was NOT good for him. Without Ramon, he used the
opportunity to polish his social presence. On the boring
mixers, he would pretend that there were hostile spies from
Cardassia in the mixer and he would play the elaborate dance
of reconnaissance with them, even though they had no clue
what he was doing. In fact, they didn't know he was doing
it, and that was his goal.

Days counted down, he turned fifteen, and finally the
engineering cruise returned. Kerryn stood at the hangar, and
waited to see Ramon come down the exit. Finally, he did,
chatting amiably with one of the other techs. And when Ramon
caught sight of Kerryn, he smiled, waved, and sighed. Kerryn
looked gorgeous. And that was why he sighed.

Kerryn had known not to scan Ramon, but when they hugged in
greeting Kerryn felt that it was just a little cool. Four
months of familiarity lost. But he was talkative enough, and
they soon were back in the groove of things. They went to
the bar, and had a few drinks.

Things were different. Kerryn could tell. But he wasn't sure
how. Ramon looked tired, and a little distracted. He bade
Kerryn goodnight early, leaving him in the bar. Odd. Kerryn
was just a bit disappointed because he had been hoping for a
joyous and enthusiastic reunion. Ramon had just blown him
off. He shrugged. Imzadi was allowed moods, too.

After a while, Kerryn decided to call it a night. He left
the bar and began walking back to his room. He stopped,
however, when he heard fragments of a heated discussion in
the hallway.

". you're an asshole, that's what."

"He's not. He's just found better, that's all."

More muttering, then, ". totally waiting here for you, and
this is how you repay him?" That sounded like Thomas.

"Fuck off, flyer." That was hissed in a whisper. And then as
Kerryn was about to go forward, Thomas rounded the bend.

"Oh fuck."

Kerryn's eyebrows raised. "You OK?"

Thomas was ashen, and caught in indecision. "You probably
don't want to go that way."

"Why? What's down there?"

Thomas sighed. "Truth."

Kerryn's resolve hardened, and he gave Thomas a bizarre look
as he went round the corner. And stopped dead.

Two figures were glued to each other. Without realizing it,
Kerryn scanned them and found them totally engrossed in each
other. They were both techs. One of them was a boy whom
Kerryn had seen from time to time.

The other was Ramon.

Kerryn stood rooted to the spot, not sure of anything. The
couple broke their make-out session to some sultry laughter,
and then the other boy noticed Kerryn. A quirk of the
eyebrows, and Ramon turned to face the one who had called
him Imzadi. The smile left his face.

"Kerryn, I ." his voice trailed off. He looked at the other
boy, who now Kerryn remembered his name was Pelossi. "You'd
better go."

"No." Kerryn found his voice. He heard it deep, he heard it
steady. "He can stay."

There was a tense silence. Kerryn just stood. He didn't care
what his face showed. And then Ramon began to speak.

"Four months is a long time. I'm lined up for a job on the
same ship as he. We can be together. You know that you and I
could never guarantee that."

Kerryn spoke softly. "We said we would try."

"What can I say? I changed my mind."

"I guess you did." He paused. "You know what hurts the most,
Ramon?" He whispered then, "Fuck off, flyer."

Ramon turned bright red and angry. "He was butting in."

"He is my friend." Kerryn started shaking. "What about you,
Ramon? Can you still be friends with a flyer?" In the
silence that followed, he finished it for him. "I am still
friends with my fellow techs. I guess you have a problem
with that."

"Damn it, Kerryn, you don't understand!"

Kerryn broke his own rule then. "I will understand." And he
slipped into Ramon's mind. And there it was. Pelossi was
hot, experienced, and rich. His family owned the ship. Ramon
wanted so much to be eclectic and have money after the four
month tour that he had basically slept his way into
Pelossi's life. The feelings between them, though, were
sincere and true. Horrified, he slipped out and back to
himself.

"Ramon, now I do understand." He spoke in a tragic voice.
"I'm so sorry."

Ramon seethed in fury and embarrassment. "Don't you EVER do
that again."

Kerryn knew the truth in that statement. "I won't have to."
He smiled, sort of oddly. "Good bye, Ramon. So long, and
thanks for all the fish."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's an old Earth saying." And Kerryn walked past them with
Thomas in tow. The last thing he heard was Pelossi
commenting, "That went better than expected."

Kerryn and Thomas made it back to the bedroom. The others
were still up, and one comment from Thomas told them to
leave Kerryn alone. Woodenly, he got ready for bed and
slipped into the sheets. He had eleven days before
graduation.

He lay there all night. It was as if he was mentally
paralyzed. Kerryn could not get past the fact that his
Imzadi had not only cheated on him, but left him, and more
so, shattered the whole sharing and respect relationship.
The slur against flyers echoed in his mind. He wondered what
it would be like tomorrow, when everyone knew. Laughing at
sorry little Kerryn, the flyer who got dumped by a tech.

But no one laughed. When he entered the bar, no one treated
him any differently. The rest of the techs were still
friends. The flyer boys didn't bat an eye. He saw Ramon
eyeing his Turian Zephyr D once, but other than that they
had little contact.

It took a long time for Kerryn to get over the event. Maybe
it was because he was a boonie, and he interacted with few
enough people that no one had hurt him that badly. He took
his Master Pilot implant update in private, along with the
congratulations, and the day before the formal ceremonies he
bade his roommates farewell.

Thomas was seething. "You should be at graduation, Kerryn.
You should get that Master Pilot cert in full public view,
and the accolades with it."

Kerryn shook his head. "No. Until I can get over this, I
have nothing to rejoice over."

Thomas wouldn't give up. "What are you doing next?"

"Ship Master program on Delvin Six, finishing here for a
month. Then I'll partner with my father and move cargo."

They could not convince him otherwise. They all had two more
terms at the school. But with sincere farewells, they saw
him to the hangar, watched the little Turian take off for
what they thought would be the last time, and go to warp.

Back on Totentanz, Doryn could tell that Kerryn was hurting.
But Kerryn refused to talk about it. Doryn realized that his
little boy was a young man now, albeit only just, but that
he now had his own demons. He cornered Kerryn on that
briefly at dinner one night.

They had just finished, and Kerryn had just gone staring
into space. Doryn decided now was good.

"You don't have to tell me, you know. But part of growing up
is making mistakes, having regrets, or even just having
things happen that go wrong despite the best planning."

Kerryn stared hard at his father. Did he know anything? He
ruefully figured he must, since Kerryn had stopped talking
about Ramon altogether. He realized now that he had split
the experience in two pieces - Imzadi was the boy before,
and Ramon was the guy afterward.

"Well, dad, lets just say I've had my heart broken for the
first time."

Doryn nodded. "I had figured as much. It's hard, but you
will get over it." He changed the subject. "Are you ready
for your string of internships?"

"Yes. I put my qualifications out and am all booked. There's
quite a spread." He sighed. "Dad, I keep trying to do
everything right. But I'm not getting anything out of it. I
used to love the feel of a perfectly tuned system. Now, I
just can't get the same feeling."

Doryn regarded his son thoughtfully. "You need a change. The
internships will be perfect."

"I hope so." But it lifted his spirits that his dad thought
so too.

The next nine months were spent in internships. Truly, he
had a varied experience. Interns were cheap labor, and
Kerryn was still fifteen but they worked him hard. However,
the experience was very useful as Kerryn realized the
variety of problems. His Romulan was invaluable in
diagnosis, and he achieved a long list of endorsements and
recommendations. He worked small ships all the way up to the
immense supercargo freighters. Often, having a Master Pilot
license, he was allowed to be flyer as well as tech on the
more permissive ships. And he learned an incredible amount
about improvising fixes. He tried some of his own, most of
which were successful but a couple did not help at all. His
peers took his mistakes with good humor; after all, that was
what he was there for.

His last internship was on a supercargo vessel named the
Tiny Tim. He had thought it very humorous, but as they
approached Delvin Six and the end of his internships, the
captain summoned him to the command deck.

"Ah, Kerryn. I see you are a Master Pilot."

"Yes, captain." Kerryn nodded with a smile.

"Most unique." He squinted, and then put on a lofty
expression. "I feel a bit off right now. Please dock us at
pylon seventeen." And he waited.

Kerryn nodded. "Which docking port?"

"Good, good. Number 5."

Oh crap. Docking Port 5 was underneath. But he did know what
to do. He slowly rotated the immense supercargo, and began
the descent onto the pylon. Slowly, slowly, and then with a
gentle kiss the pylon connected, secured itself, and all was
brought to rest.

The captain had watched him shrewdly. "You're a decent
pilot. Why are you going out for Ship Master?"

Kerryn shrugged. "I'm a boonie. I've got to be both."

Laughter filled the command deck as the captain clapped him
on the back. "Remember that, lad. Remember that the only
reason there are socialites is that the others have to be
the boonies. No boonies, no Guild."

"Yes sir, and thanks." He slipped slightly and grinned
widely. "You've got a real beauty of a vessel here."

"Yes, I do." They bade farewell, and Kerryn returned to
Delvin Six North, to his suite of rooms. He was only a
little lonely. The last trip on the Tiny Tim had been
spacious enough, but they were still three techs to a room,
and one of them had had really smelly feet. Kerryn had gone
back to his four hour sleep schedule just to avoid that.

In a month he would be sixteen. That was the age in which he
would be recognized as an independent adult, and not
dependent upon a guardian. He was pretty independent as it
was, but that age would seal it.

The silence from Starfleet echoed through space like the
freezing of ice.

When he arrived at his suite, after stopping in the bar for
a drink and to catch up on route news, he noticed that his
comm unit was beeping at him. Hmmm. He had been out for
almost four weeks. This would be pretty old. Starfleet,
perhaps? His heart raced as he turned it on and the message
appeared. It was yesterday, and it was the Station Commander
at the Guild Flight School. His heart slowed, but only a
little.

"Greetings, Gold Four. Allow me to introduce Team Two in the
upcoming War Game." And as Kerryn watched, both his
roommates, Mike and Thomas, and a dozen other fliers, and
another two dozen techs filled the screen.

Thomas spoke. "Kerryn, we need you here. I know it is just
flight school, but frankly all the elitist assholes got
together and rigged the selection, and we are at a severe
disadvantage." The word "language!" echoed in the
background, and Thomas rolled his eyes. "Your two favorite
people are leading the other team. All our team wants is a
fair chance. The Station Commander has granted us favorable
terms on other choices, but we need you to pull it together.
Please acknowledge when you can; we know you are on an
internship right now but should be back soon. Thanks,
Kerryn." And the image faded.

Back to flight school, to help with a war game? Some of the
angst returned, and he could use a break. He had learned a
lot of dirty stuff that could be used. And his two favorite
people . that would be Illiar and Ramon. He snickered at
what that friction would be like. And he decided that he
could take a month off if the program would let him.

He called the Station Commander, who appeared on the screen
shortly.

"Good day, sir, this is Gold Four."

The commander nodded. "Ah yes. What can I do for you?"

"Sir, I am trying to find a way for my program to allow me
to return to the school to help Team Two in the War Game,
and would appreciate any advice you might have."

The commander grinned. "Interesting. As it turns out, I've
already cleared the way. You will be here to fly the game,
yes, and take away an additional qualification in
improvisational tactics if you win. The Ship Master program
is in concurrence with this."

Kerryn's eyes went wide. "That easy?"

"Well, we anticipated that you would not be able to resist
the opportunity, for a number of reasons. The most prevalent
one is that with all those internships, you would not want
to lose the skill of command since your success on Team
Three." And his eyes twinkled.

Kerryn groaned. "Can I speak freely?"

"Just this once."

"What role do they really want me for?"

"The discussion I overheard was that they wanted to make you
Admiral."

Kerryn shook his head. "I don't want to be Admiral. Leading
Team Three wiped me out."

"I think you could pretty much create your own role."

That caught an idea. He grinned suddenly. "Sir, if I do not
accept, who is likely to be chosen as Admiral?"

"Thomas Silver. He has shown the greatest aptitude. But note
that the opposing team is formidable."

Kerryn nodded. "Yes, Ramon is certainly formidable that way.
How about Illiar?"

"He performs well on structured operations." And that sealed
it. The word structured was what Kerryn wanted to hear.

"Sir, I believe I will accept this opportunity, though not
as Admiral."

The Station Commander looked at him wryly. "Here we go out
of the box again."

"Thomas said we had favorable preferences. What does that
mean?"

"You have first choice of ships, and choice of location.
Three ships per team."

Kerryn grinned. Yes, he could get into this. "When can I
start?"

The Station Commander nodded. "Now. Begin planning. A
shuttle will arrive for you to bring you to the station
shortly."

"Sir, I can be ready in six hours." That would be cutting it
close.

"Good. I will inform your team." He leaned forward. "I am
looking forward to your performance in this." And he broke
contact.

Kerryn flew out the corridor and down to the hardware
salvage section. He knew what he wanted. He had recognized
it but hadn't had time to buy it. And it would make all the
difference in the world. Panting, he showed up outside the
Salvage Office.

Derrigan was a mild mannered man. He collected junk, sorted
junk, and sold junk. Most of what he got was free for the
taking, so when he sold it, he always turned a profit. If he
didn't understand it, he didn't care. He did well enough.
And Kerryn was a long time friend, having scavenged for
Totentanz. But today, Kerryn slid into his office, looking a
bit wild.

"Kerryn, my friend! What's the rush?"

"I've got a hot project. I need to buy Lot 83, and I won't
be back for a month."

"Lot 83, eh?" He pulled it up on his terminal. A metallic
object, hourglass shaped, with some odd couplings. Probably
Romulan. "Fifty credits."

"Deal."

"Aren't you going to argue?"

Kerryn shook his head. "No time."

Credits exchanged, and Kerryn was handed a large package.
"No charge for the anti-grav this time."

"Thanks, buddy!" And the transaction was complete.

Derrigan was curious, though. "So, now that you have robbed
me, what is it?"

Kerryn grinned. "If I'm not mistaken, it is a Romulan
Cloaking Device."

"Holy shit."

"Yes, indeed! Mark it down, my friend. I'm holding your
retirement."

Derrigan laughed. "Not this time, but the next one,
absolutely. Let me know if it works."

"Will do." And Kerryn bolted on down back to his room to
pack.

The Guild shuttle arrived on schedule, and let Kerryn land
the Turian in its hangar before going to warp. Kerryn used
the time to scour the device. Indeed, it was a Romulan
Cloaking Device, and Kerryn had learned enough from
Totentanz systems to know what to do with it. It would be
the one thing that both Illiar and Ramon would never
suspect.

He landed with the Guild shuttle, flew the Turian to its
assigned side hangar, and approached the Guild Office. The
Station Commander and Flight Commander were both there, and
when he uploaded his implant information to the station
computer, they were both grinning.

"Lieutenant, it is good to see you back." Kerryn still
wasn't used to the Master Pilot title he had been granted.

"Thank you, sirs. It is a bit odd being back after so long."

They handed him an orientation package. "Your old bed is
full; we have assigned you private quarters in the Pilot
quadrant. We have also arranged it so that you may escort
one person of choice into that quadrant." They handed him a
communicator badge. "This communicates with anyone on your
Team."

"It works like Starfleet ones?"

They stared at him, and then nodded. "Yes. Have you
interacted with Starfleet much?"

"My allegiance is to the Guild, through and through. We can
discuss Starfleet some other time, please." Kerryn was still
anxious over that one. His sixteenth birthday was only a
couple weeks away and he was hoping to hear from them.
Still. Even though there had been no contact since he left
Earth.

The Head Technician skidded into the office. "Shit like a
nova, you ARE back!" He pumped Kerryn's hand up and down.
"We've got to talk. Later. Meet me in the bar." And he ran
off.

The other two men rolled their eyes. "Team One has been
giving him grief."

With a straight face, Kerryn nodded. "That is to be
expected." And then he laughed. "Oh god, this is going to be
good."

The Station Commander realized that Kerryn had a plan.
"Shoo. And give them hell."

The Flight Commander clicked his tongue. "Really, Marshall,
we are supposed to be bipartisan." And they dismissed
Kerryn.

Kerryn went to his room to get settled. Now THIS was a ROOM!
Living room, work area, bedroom, private bath! King size
bed, large enough for three people. Of course, he had no one
to share it with, but it was nice. And most importantly, a
view. He really missed seeing the outside of space. Here, he
could hide and recuperate.

But he needed someplace to plan a war. Calling up a station
plan, he found unoccupied retail space in the main access
area. It was at the end of the main corridor, a little out
of the way, but it had ten thousand square feet, some tables
and a good solid door. Without even thinking twice, he
booked it for a month. Five hundred credits, but it would be
worth every one!

His communicator beeped. He tapped it, and before he could
say anything, Thomas's voice came across the unit. "Team
Two, strategy meeting in the cafeteria begins in five
minutes." Kerryn quickly closed out his comm unit and
hurried off to the cafeteria.

What he didn't realize was that he was still in Guild
uniform. Heads turned and followed him as his heels clicked
quietly along the floor. He apparently was nearly the last
one there, as they were closing the door when he slipped in.
Nodding at his emerald commbadge, which matched all those on
Team Two, they let him in.

No one recognized him. That was for sure. Had it been so
long? Maybe it was the uniform. He shrugged, as Thomas and
Mike stood up. His two former roommates would make a
formidable team.

Thomas spoke. "Team, I have good news! Lieutenant Kerryn has
agreed to team with us!" A round of applause. "It is
imperative that we place him in a position of leadership. He
was, after all, Gold Four and the captain of the winning
exercise team. He should be joining us relatively soon."

Thomas's jaw dropped as Kerryn stepped forward, grinning.
"How about now?"

The roar of enthusiasm was embarrassing to say the least,
but Kerryn realized that they were really desperate.

Thomas finally spoke. "All in favor of naming Kerryn Admiral
for Team Two?" A round of approvals. "All opposed?"

In the silence, Kerryn spoke aloud. "Opposed."

The team was aghast. Against the outcry, he grinned and put
his hands up. "Look, you all have done just fine without me.
Who would you select without me?"

Mike spoke, grinning. "Thomas, actually."

Kerryn nodded. "Well, Thomas it should be." And when the
muttering started, Kerryn raised his voice. "However, I
would very much like to be one of your captains and your
Chief Strategy and Reconnaissance Officer, Admiral." In the
silence, he continued, "Let me do what I do best. Flight and
Tech."

Thomas began clapping. "You got it!" And the rest of the
discussion got underway.

Kerryn spoke a while to the team. He told them about the
rented space, and that became the hub for all the team
planning. To him, this was as much a mind game as an armed
conflict. "Everyone, realize that to win a war, exactly one
man must have awareness and control. It isn't the admiral.
It is the tactician, the planner, the strategist. The
Admiral focuses on execution." He had grinned. "In more ways
than one." It was a quote from a Romulan tech manual, but it
was funny enough that the team laughed along. To keep his
role ambiguous, everyone would refer to him as the CSRO. Or
captain.

The next day each team would choose its three ships. Team
Two got first pick of the first two, then Team One got to
pick two, and then the last one each. After studying the
ships, Kerryn had carefully coached Thomas into choosing the
biggest and most powerful, and then the sturdiest. The ships
were named only by Greek letters, but Alpha was the
behemoth. Delta was almost the smallest, but it had been
built by Turian Shipworks and Kerryn knew that engineering
better than anything other than Totentanz. Delta was also
the hardiest, and no slouch on weapons. Of the remaining
ones likely to be chosen by Team One, Kerryn planned on
Upsilon as Team Two's third ship.

The actual selection meeting was priceless. Team Two arrived
first, with the three Commanders joining them. Thomas, the
Admiral, and his two captains Mike and Kerryn. Kerryn was
waiting for the moment of the other team's arrival. He, of
course, had worn his Guild uniform rather than the school
uniform. He could fix that later.

The doors opened and Illiar, two unknowns and Ramon entered.
They shook hands with the commanders, and when they turned
to Team Two, Illiar and Ramon both stopped cold.

Kerryn smiled. "Greetings, Team One." He put his hand out,
but it was not accepted.

"What are you doing here?"

"I am here supporting my Admiral for Team Two." His smile
changed to one of lofty superiority. "I am still enrolled in
the Flight School, you know."

They apparently didn't know. Neither shook his hand, but
looked venomously at the commanders, who nodded. The Station
Commander responded, "That is correct."

Ramon stood in shock. His boonie upbringing should have let
him rebound from this, but apparently Pelossi had been
primping him. Waste of a good boonie.

Thomas stepped forward, grinning. "Admiral Thomas Silver,
Team Two. My captains, Mike Bonno and Guild Lieutenant,
Master Pilot and Master Technician Kerryn." Thomas could
play drama, and he let the quals sink in.

Illiar recovered, and introduced his two captains. Kerryn
now remembered these two as prima donnas with little
expertise. Ramon was his best resource. He grinned. Taking
the Delta would be a double dig, because it was Turian and
Ramon loved Turians.

Illiar then introduced Ramon. "And finally, this is Ramon
who is my lead tech."

Ramon turned and glared at Illiar, who then lamely
continued, "And a Master Technician."

They chose ships. When Thomas called out for Alpha, Illiar
flinched. When he called out for Delta, Illiar snickered but
Ramon flinched and elbowed Illiar, who then looked pained.
They then called out their ships, Phi and Theta. Kerryn
laughed inside. Theta was a disaster, but it was as large as
Alpha. Just hopelessly underpowered.

Ramon pulled Illiar aside for some violent whispering.
Kerryn could just pick out, ".. Shut up. You're here because
I said so."

Thomas called out for Upsilon, and Illiar took Rho. Kerryn
could barely suppress his glee. He had gotten the ones he
wanted, and what was more, he saw lots of contention on Team
One. Leave it to Illiar to rule with a fist. He then
realized how they could guarantee their victory. They had to
lose the first battle. The team wouldn't like it, but it
would pay off.

That was just what happened. The rules said that the winner
would be the best out of all battles on a two week period.
One week to refurbish their ships, two weeks to fight.
Kerryn did not sleep most of that first week, nor did most
of the techs on Team Two, but when they were done Alpha was
as ostentatious as it could be, Upsilon was a close second,
and Delta was a rock-solid fighting machine with one special
component: a Romulan Cloaking Device.

He had only told Thomas and Mike about it, but when he did
they literally whooped with joy. Kerryn and the Delta crew
used it for reconnaissance about Team One, and saved it for
the final conflict. The endgame battle was the last one of
the two week period, and counted five times as much as the
other battles.

They lost the first one. Not badly, but enough to ensure
that Team One got cocky and trusted Illiar. They fell for it
hook, line and sinker. Periodically, and before each of the
other battles the cloaked Delta would go out, watch Team
One, report back, and then when ready Team Two would strike.
Team One only got an offensive posture on the first battle,
and one in the middle when Kerryn had gone on recon for them
and found them gone. Team Two was ready, but only just. That
had been their hardest victory until endgame.

It wasn't that mistakes weren't made, but Team Two's were
correctable. Team One seemed to be acting on arrogance.
Kerryn figured that there would be some interesting stories
later, mostly from the techs.

The endgame battle was ferocious. Each side had to win.
Illiar could win by one point if he won endgame. Upsilon and
Phi exchanged fire and disabled each other. The mighty Alpha
had directly engaged Theta, and Delta was working over Rho.
But it was here that Illiar caught them unexpected, and had
Rho break off and join the attack on Alpha. Together they
tried to disable Alpha, but Rho could not function on that
scale and was hopelessly lost and adrift afterwards. Since
the flagships were nearly disabled, it looked like Team One
would win.

Except for Delta. Theta could have wiped Delta out in
minutes, whereas Delta barely could thump a fully functional
Theta. Delta, however had disappeared. Kerryn had seen the
move, and elected that now was the time. He engaged the
cloak, and they moved Delta down and under Theta. When Rho
was disabled and Theta exposed and on the brink, he
decloaked immediately under Theta and let fire with
absolutely everything he had. Delta could be disabled as
long as it took Theta with it, before Alpha went down.

On the bridge of Theta, Admiral Illiar sat in his chair,
watching the eventual destruction of Alpha. Victory was
certain. The crews were very tense, though. And rightfully
so, as the proximity alarm went off.

"Admiral, Delta just appeared under us!"

"WHAT THE FUCK??" He never got another word out before the
entire ship clanged and thundered with Delta's full barrage
of weapons. Suddenly all his lights went red, indicating
that they were disabled.

"FUCKING SHIT!!!"

Aboard Alpha, Thomas sat, wary. They were losing, and Theta
was out there in space, gloating. Suddenly, he saw a flicker
under Theta, and a desperate hope filled him. "Everyone
watch the screen NOW!!!"

They did, and they saw little Delta rake Theta from head to
tail, and then Theta's status on tactical miraculously
changed to the red of disablement. Thomas called out,
"Ship's status!"

"SIR, WE ARE STILL FUNCTIONING!!!"

We won, thought Thomas. And what's more, Delta was still
intact too. He opened a comm link. "Team Two, this is your
Admiral. All of the enemy is disabled. As for us," he
paused, "Upsilon is disabled, but both Alpha and Delta
survived. We WON!" And he could hear the thunderous roar of
victory.

Back on the flight school, a credit chit passed to the head
tech from the Flight Commander. "How did he do all that? How
did he sneak under Theta?"

The head tech grinned. "My guess, since Delta is Turian, and
Kerryn would know that engineering better than anyone, is
that he's got a cloaking device on Delta."

They stared at him. "Where would he get one of those?"

"How about Salvage?" And they grinned. Kerryn was a boonie,
and absolutely familiar with the various Salvage offices.

"Son of a bitch."

The victory was tremendous. The commanders had planned a
mixer on an unprecedented scale, and the other students had
begged Kerryn for a debrief. They agreed to hold a debrief
led by Thomas and Mike two hours before the mixer for anyone
who wanted to attend. The audience eventually comprised of
all the teachers, all of Team Two, and all the techs from
Team One. Only a handful of Illiar's flight team attended,
and they were so pissed off at the handling of Team One that
they had no problem with Team Two's victory.

The only place large enough for such a debrief was in the
main foyer, so while everyone was well behaved and silent,
they went through the strategies, some of the dirty ploys
that Kerryn had learned, and highlighted everywhere Team One
made a significant mistake. Thomas and Mike went through all
Team Two's mistakes as well.

Two persons attended of significance. The first was Ramon,
who stood in the back, amazed. Kerryn had outdone himself.
He knew Thomas, and some of the other Team Two staff, and
they were not capable of the level of planning done here.
Illiar had lured all the highest performers, but did that
help his team? Illiar had been such an ass, and his whole
group of friends too. For just a moment he remembered how
things had been with Kerryn, and the feel of that hot mouth
on his cock, and then the reminder that Pelossi gave him
security and luxury pervaded.

The second person of significance was the Guild Director. He
too had been amazed, but with the vicious satisfaction at
seeing those arrogant boobies get their butts whipped. And
he had one very pleasant duty yet to come.

When the debrief was over, the three commanders got up and
spoke briefly in support and congratulations. And that was
when the Guild Director moved out of the shadows, stood, and
the commanders stopped speaking mid-sentence.

"ALL STAND FOR THE GUILD DIRECTOR!" That was the Station
Commander. Humph. Hating formality, the grizzled old Guild
Director approached the front of the crowd.

"Please be at ease." He turned to Thomas. "Congratulations
on a very well executed war, from all aspects, Admiral. No
question that your command staff has met qualifications."
This brought a well-rounded cheer, and flushed smiles from
Thomas and Mike.

He turned to Kerryn. "There is one more thing. Lieutenant,
how old are you?"

"Fifteen, sir." Kerryn still felt the awe of this powerful
person in front of him.

The Guild Director shook his head. "I believe you are
mistaken. You turned sixteen years old yesterday."

Kerryn blushed, thought it through, and grinned. "You are
correct, sir. It must have been the fog of war."

"Whatever." He grinned at Kerryn, and winked. "Anyway, it is
my pleasure to inform you, Lieutenant Kerryn, Master Pilot
and Master Technician, that since you are now only sixteen,
that title is no longer sufficient for you." Kerryn looked
surprised, and there was muttering started. "Congratulations
on the completion of your program with high distinction,
Ship Master Kerryn."

The din was deafening. Kerryn just gaped at him as the other
students from both teams screamed their approval, and all
three commanders clapped and cheered.

The Guild Director loved these moments. They were what
defined the Guild. And with Kerryn still standing there with
a tear slowly running down his face, the Guild Director
shook his hand, handed him a small box, and took out what
looked like a solid gold scanner. He pointed at Kerryn's
arm, since they couldn't speak because of the noise, and
with that gold scanner he updated Kerryn's implant.

"Thank you, SIR!!" Realization hit the only just sixteen-
year-old, and joy and accomplishment swept through him. He
had made it. The Guild worked in mysterious ways, it seems,
because he didn't remember anything that could have been
hidden as a test.

The crowd finally quieted, and the director spoke again.
"That was a well-fought war out there. I am very pleased
with all the combatants.  But the duties of the Director of
the Freighter Guild are many, and so I can not stay for your
revelry. But you have my congratulations to all, both techs
and fliers. Without both of you, there would be no Guild."
And amid another round of applause, he departed. He loved
visiting the school, but some emissary needed stroking now.
Always the little things took him away from what he enjoyed.

Kerryn stashed the box in his uniform, and then followed the
crowd to the mixer. He stayed for a little bit, but it was
quickly reverting back to sex acquisition time. It made
Kerryn sick to see Imzadi - no, it was Ramon, with Pelossi.
So he chatted most with the teacher chaperones for a while,
and then made his way to the exit.

Thomas and Mike ran over and came to see him. Mike was the
one who started.

"Where y'going? This is your best chance!"

Pelossi's really irritating high-pitched laugh echoed at
that moment. Ramon was with him, and both had dressed in
expensive clothing that was stylistic of the wealthy. Mike
looked over, and understood immediately.

"I see."

Kerryn sighed. "It still gets to me."

Mike finally had it. "Look, your sex life has totally sucked
since you got here. You haven't brought anyone back, boy or
girl, and yes I know about that. Right now you could have
anyone you wanted. So pick one and go relieve some tension!"

Kerryn knew that things like this bugged Mike. Mike always
came home with a girl from the mixer, and apparently was
quite noisy about the whole thing. Kerryn had heard the
other roommates discussing it. So on a whim, he looked at
Thomas, whose eyes bugged out as he said, "Well, you're
taken." So he turned to Mike, batted his eyes and took on a
simpering posture. "Well, what about you, Mikey-boy?"

They all froze for a moment, and then Kerryn couldn't help
it. He snorted and had to sit down from the laughter. Mike
had been precious. He had looked horrified at first, and
then resigned like doing Kerryn might be his duty. Then it
had apparently crossed his mind that Kerryn would be fucking
him, not the other way around, and he went back to
horrified.

Thomas was filled with amusement, and Mike finally eased up
and shrugged wryly. "Out of pity, you almost got me there."

Kerryn shook his head. "I don't want a pity fuck."

"I know." He grinned suddenly. "It was my only way out." But
a curious thought crossed his mind. "But, really, would I
have enjoyed it?"

Kerryn nodded. "I make sure whomever I am with will enjoy
it." He looked over, now eager to get past Mike's
embarrassment on this, and saw a blond girl ogling the three
of them. Kerryn blew her a kiss and pointed at Mike as he
turned around. "The blond over there is daydreaming about
your butt."

"Really? Time to make dreams come true." And he departed in
pursuit.

Thomas had to ask. "She wasn't really, was she?"

"No. But he was feeling awkward." Kerryn grinned. "Good bye,
Admiral Silver."

Thomas nodded. "I had a feeling you might leave before we
recovered. You were awesome, Kerryn."

"WE were awesome. One man does not make a war."

They shook hands, and Kerryn left. He returned to his room,
collected his things, when he noticed that the Cloaking
Device was missing. Damn. Where the fuck had that gone.

The answer arrived quickly. "Ship Master Kerryn, please
report to the Station Commander's office." That was his
receptionist.

"May I ask why?"

She replied, "A student has challenged the outcome of the
war." And when she rolled her eyes, Kerryn realized that
this was not threatening to him, at least.

"I'll be right there."

He waited only long enough to put the Ship Master lapel bar
on his collar. It was getting quite crowded up there.

Somehow, he knew it would be Illiar. As he was on his way,
one of the Team One techs stopped him in the hall.

"Kerryn, you've got to be aware of this. Illiar is
complaining about the device. But Illiar sank some of his
own money into our ships too. Five thousand credits. We had
the best audio music system and vid players in the galaxy.
It was part of the bribe to get people on his team."

"Thanks. He really was a jerk about this whole thing. I just
never realized how bad." Kerryn shook his head. "I knew him
from our space care centers. He never used to be this way."

The tech rolled his eyes. "People change. Mostly for the
better."

Kerryn showed up at the office, and the receptionist held
him back for a moment. "He's going eloquent in there.  I can
tell from everyone's attitude that this is the most
unwelcome thing right now. Don't lose your cool."

He grinned nervously at her. "It's still kind of
intimidating to a boonie like me." She laughed at that, and
admitted him.

The three commanders were there, and their deputies as well.
Six. Illiar was had apparently been talking for some time,
but stopped when he entered. The cloaking device stood in
its crate on a table.

The Station Commander stood. "Ah, Kerryn. Come in." He
gestured to a seat, and Kerryn took it in appropriate
posture. "Procedurally, we must listen to any objections
that are brought before us on the outcome of the war. The
Team One Admiral and several of his staff have elected to
object on a topic. They did not attend your most excellent
debrief."

Kerryn kept calm. But there were a million tricks coming to
his mind right now. "I see. Please continue. I will
cooperate fully."

They grinned. "We appreciate that, thank you."

Kerryn turned to his opponent, and nodded in greeting.
"Illiar."

"Kerryn."

First trick. It might be his only dig. "You mean sir, of
course."

"I beg your pardon?" Venom in his voice.

But Kerryn managed a lofty, condescending tone. Thank God
for negotiation skills. "Sir is a customary sign of respect
for a Ship Master at an investigative hearing."

Illiar stared at Kerryn, then at his collar, and turned
absolutely purple. He choked out, "Of course, sir," and
looked like he would detonate on the spot.

The Station Master coughed. "The objection is the use of the
cloaking device, that the procurement of outside equipment
of great value changed the outcome of the war in an
inappropriate way."

Kerryn nodded. "I see. May I speak informally?"

"By all means."

"It is true, that when I accepted the position of Chief
Strategist and Reconnaissance Officer in Team Two and before
I arrived at the flight school, I did go to the Salvage
Office at Delvin Six North where I was based. I did procure
the device, without knowing what kind of ship or interface
might be available. I had to gamble on it working, and my
engineering skills to integrate it at no risk to my
shipmates."

Illiar glared at the committee. "An admission of guilt."

Kerryn shook his head. "Not quite. Illiar, did you make any
procurements for your fleet outside the flight school?"

Illiar turned purple. "Some."

Kerryn faced the committee. "One of his techs reported that
he procured over five thousand credits worth of audio and
video theater equipment, as incentive for team members to
sign on with him in advance of the official recruiting
schedule."

Illiar's jaw dropped, and Kerryn continued. "So it would
seem that we both procured items prior to the selection of
ships. Mine impacted myself only and had significant utility
to the war. I can't assess the role or effectiveness of
his."

Illiar recovered slightly. "Mine had no impact on the
outcome of the war."

Kerryn countered. "Didn't it? Wouldn't your choice of staff
impact the outcome?" He smiled again. "There are a great
many factors, you know. Not all of them are ship related."

The Station Commander finally made a comment. "Per your
debrief, Kerryn, you showed that you only cloaked while on
reconnaissance and never in conflict until near the end of
the final battle. That shows judicious use of a key asset."

The Flight Commander spoke. "I have verified station
procurements, and the exact amount procured off station by
Team One is five thousand and eighty two credits. I have
zero credits for Team Two, but as you said, Kerryn, you
procured it at Delvin Six North." He leaned forward. "How
much did you spend?"

Kerryn looked directly at him, and said, "Fifty credits."

Illiar exploded. "No fucking way! It must have cost over a
million, or you stole it!"

Eyebrows raised all around. "Flight Officer Illiar, are you
accusing Ship Master Kerryn of Grand Larceny?"

That hit Illiar like a splash of ice water. Going absolutely
white, he shook his head. "No, sirs. I meant it only as a
figure of speech."

"Good." The Flight Commander was colder than ice water.

Kerryn spoke up. "You can verify it with the Delvin Six
North Salvage Office. The man who runs it is named Derrigan.
He is aware that when I bought it from him, I knew what it
was and he did not. It was identified as Lot 83."

"Fifty credits." All six officials stared at him.

"Yes, sirs." Then he added, "A boonie like me doesn't have a
lot of credits to throw around, you know."

That brought a round of laughter, and Illiar turned deep red
again. Finally, the Station Commander asked Illiar directly.
"Any further objections to add?"

"No, sirs."

"Before we rule, would you like to withdraw the objection?
Once we rule, it becomes a permanent part of your record."

Illiar was smart, that was true. He knew when a way out was
being offered. So he nodded, and said, "Sirs, with this new
information I withdraw my objection."

"Meeting adjourned." Everyone stood, and they all left,
leaving Illiar and Kerryn to themselves. Kerryn walked over,
enabled the anti-grav packaging and began pushing the crate
down to the main hangar. Illiar had ruined the whole feeling
of victory for him just now, and again all he wanted to do
was get away.

Illiar followed him to the hallway, where they split. Kerryn
looked at Illiar, and spoke quietly but evenly.

"Enjoy the mixer. And best of luck. We probably won't meet
again."

Illiar nodded, and almost stormed down the hallway. Kerryn
got on the turbolift, handled the device and his departure,
and soon was at warp towards Delvin Six North. He had two
weeks before Totentanz would pick him up. He had flown three
times around the school before leaving, and once around
Delta who was placidly in orbit. Oh, to be a captain
someday! He had loved Delta and his crew.

The Turian hurtled through space, and shortly landed in the
main hangar. He stowed her, and went back to his suite.
Really, all his possessions were there. Very little of his
was on Totentanz. But not for long. He and his father could
now treat each other as equals in the Guild. That would take
a big strain off his dad, who was getting older quickly.
Sometimes it showed, now more often as not.

He bought himself some new uniforms and clothes. Rather than
guess, he actually went to a clothing specialist. The
outcome was spectacular. Kerryn had known how to dress as a
trader and freight mover, but not as a young man. When he
had put on the first outfit and looked in the mirror, he
realized that he hadn't looked in the mirror in a long time.
His hair had grown really long, but it looked really good
that way. He had gotten tall - not tall for a person, but
tall for him. His legs were much longer and his arms too. He
looked very attractive. And that gave him confidence.

On the fourth day he woke up, feeling edgy. Everything
seemed to be missing from him in a way. He couldn't find the
right clothes. He wasn't happy with breakfast, or lunch.
Other than an edgy and incomplete feeling, he had no other
symptoms. He had started to move in the larger circles of
the Guild, as his Ship Master rank on the implant got him
into virtually all the Guild facilities. He planned a week's
vacation down on Delvin Six itself, which was famous for its
lush beaches and tropical islands in the middle latitudes.

It got worse. He literally felt like he had mental hives
when he left a lunch restaurant where he had eaten with one
of his Tiny Tim technician friends. And so, preoccupied as
he moved down the hallway, he was totally unprepared for
what happened next.

Totally.

A handsome and important figure led an entourage through the
hallway. Her flowing skirts of an iridescent material
complemented her figure. She was older, true, but still
supple with a certain girlish flair that she used to
advantage. Most of the Federation trembled in fear and awe
of her. And she, too, had many things on her mind as she
moved through the corridor. Just on the pure off chance, her
eyes flicked around as she went, and they landed on a very
young man wearing a Guild uniform, whose brow was furrowed
and he looked devilishly attractive. She smiled to herself.
He would probably be inexperienced, but have a lot of
stamina.

And that was when it happened. At the same moment in time,
he lifted his eyes to hers, and statistically, one in about
fifty such encounters results in a Betazoid biological
experience known as the Frenzy. Lwaxana Troi, Federation
Ambassador to Betazed, Daughter of the Fifth House, and
Keeper of the Sacred Chalice of Riix, realized that a couple
hours from now she was going to be very intimately engaged
with this young hunk. And that made her flush all over. The
Frenzy was no mystery to her.

Kerryn had seen the entourage, and as he went by he glanced
at them. But when his eyes hit the handsome woman's eyes,
the mental zing was so pronounced that he actually walked
right into a bulkhead. His mind started humming to him that
she would complete him, she would be his, and his body
joined right in with the clamor. In less than ten seconds,
Kerryn went from preoccupied young man to off-the-scale
horny sex machine with . well now, NOW, with the most
exquisite piece of humanoid female in the galaxy!

He tried to walk again, but hit the bulkhead. Again.
Finally, the woman was somewhat gone, but one of her
retainers remained, watching him. When Kerryn surrendered,
and came over to him, the man spoke in a quiet contralto
voice.

"You are part Betazoid?" Kerryn nodded. "My lady will
accommodate you in several hours. Have you experienced the
Frenzy before?"

Kerryn's jaw dropped. "Is that what it is?" He shook his
head, and terror and dread filled him. "No, never."

"I will contact you soon when she is ready."

Kerryn finally blurted out, "Are you sure?"

He nodded. "My lady is never wrong."

Kerryn took a deep breath. "OK. I am Kerryn, staying in
section thirteen." He had to double check. "There's no
avoiding this, is there?"

The man shook his head. "No." And he left.

Kerryn went back to his suite. He tried to contact his dad
on Totentanz, but it wasn't on subspace. He had no one to
talk to about this, and it was going to happen in hours, not
days. He showered to help relax, splurging for real water,
but all he could think about was fucking and the close
intimacy of that handsome woman who now dominated his
thoughts. He would worship her, fawn for her and happily do
anything she asked, which he realized he hoped was a lot.

What the fuck? A part of him realized that this was out of
control. But he couldn't help it. His mind didn't belong to
him anymore. He paced. What had his father said? Just go
along for the ride. It was natural, it was biological, it
had nothing to do with preferences or orientations. He began
to breathe deeply, and when the comm system chimed he ran to
it, in breathless expectation.

But it was just a text invitation to one of the best suites
in the station. Stepping in front of the mirror one last
time, he looked superb. And then he all but sprinted to
where his sex goddess was waiting. For him, and only for
him. She would complete him.

The door chimed, and it opened. And there she was. And there
was no question that he would serve her every whim, her
every desire, and as the door closed he realized that she
was ready for him NOW. He pulled his clothes off without a
second thought and dove forward into rapture.

Six hours later they lay on the expansive bed. Kerryn's mind
was sizzling with memory, and a mental sting that was slowly
abating. They had just separated, and he was slowly
remembering who and where he was, and what they had done.
His mental balance was regaining.

A creak, a rustle, and the handsome woman he was with stood
in front of him, wearing a light robe. He saw her survey
him, still totally naked and still half aroused, and having
regained at least a little aplomb he lay back and stretched.
There wasn't much to say, really. At least for him.

She spoke, her voice slightly hoarse from all the moaning.
"Well now, little one, I haven't had that much fun in a long
time."

Kerryn flushed. "I hope I didn't hurt you."

She laughed, and shook her head. "That was mild compared to
some. But oh, did it feel good." He could do it, she
realized, and she came and sat next to him. "One thing I
have learned, and since this is your first time you should
learn it too, is that after you have been through all this,
try for one more time. One more time that you choose to do,
not are compelled to do. It proves the kindness and openness
that we Betazoids believe in."

He nodded. "That makes a lot of sense." His cock now rising
again, he put on his most sexy expression and shifted
slightly for what he hoped was the best effect. "Would you
oblige me?"

She grinned and dropped her robe. "Oh yes, little one, but
this time you are going take me." And they rolled on the bed
together, Kerryn now easily finding the right position, and
they began the buildup of excitement together. She had been
in his mind the entire time, and this time Kerryn was
emboldened by his success. So as they got closer to orgasm,
him feeling the rich sensations of pleasure he slipped into
her mind, elusive, and zeroed in on the pleasure point.

The reaction he got was totally unexpected. Her entire body
went rigid in orgasm, and her mind tried to escape. But he
had caught her off guard, and as he made the last final
strokes before his own orgasm he held her captive as best as
he could. He felt a warm glow together, and with a cry he
crossed the line of no return and emptied himself deeply
into her. But he knew that for that moment, that exquisite
complete instant of tension and sensation, he truly held her
captive and she could not escape. She was his, and his
tension broke, and with it his hold on her and his mind
crawled out of hers.

Lwaxana Troi was dumbfounded. No one had EVER controlled her
like that. EVER. True, it was short, and she was exhausted,
but the mind! Well! She deserved it, and she had enjoyed it.

The intimacy then drained away faster, and Kerryn got up to
freshen himself. When he returned, she was in her robe,
smiling, and he had managed to get half dressed. As he
finished, she spoke to him in his mind.

You haven't spoken to me this way.

He shook his head. "I haven't done it since I was five.
Maybe someday."

She nodded, and continued in his mind. You have a great mind
there. Let me show you some tricks.

He nodded slowly, and the next ten minutes gave him an
arsenal of mental tools from this handsome woman. He thanked
her, and was ready to leave, but she stopped him.

"Leaving is always the hardest, and most awkward. Thank you,
little one. You were exquisite."

Kerryn responded, a little wryly. "I understand so much more
now. I was a virgin until this, you know."

She nodded, and her eyes twinkled. "You were a virgin the
first time. The dozen or more times afterward, you were
definitely not."

He laughed, and stood at the door. "I don't even know your
name."

She smiled, and winked. "I probably am the Betazoid
government. Daughter of the Fifth House of Betazed. Keeper
of the Sacred Chalice of Riix. Do you need more than that?"

"A name would be nice."

"Then, Kerryn," she said his name for the first time, "You
may call me Lwaxana."

He nodded, and the door closed. Kerryn slowly made his way
back to his own suite, where he now desperately needed a
shower from all the sweat and other secretions, and then
about a week's worth of sleep.

Two days later found him on the beaches of the planet side
of Delvin Six. The experience with Lwaxana and the Frenzy
had given him a new confidence, and many of the people he
knew just assumed that he had finally gotten laid. Certainly
his swimwear would attest to that. After Lwaxana, he had
been overcome by a daring and nonchalant feeling, which when
combined with a really hot body like his, the beautiful
beaches of his home planet, and finally the very small patch
of bathing suit that he was wearing, together gave him all
the confidence he needed, and more. He was sixteen, he was
beautiful, as a Betazoid he was sterile until he chose, and
he was a great fuck.

Kerryn had promised himself that he would take any
reasonable offer for sex, male or female. He would be back
on Totentanz in a few more days, and he needed to be
satisfied. He stayed away from the normal pollutants and
substances, but his first night was with a young blonde girl
named Olivi who was on them. He could tell that she was
feeling lots, but too stoned to be active in her response.

The second one was a guy, Manuel. Manuel was a little older,
but gentle enough when Kerryn bottomed for him. Manuel could
tell that Kerryn had little experience, but he made up for
that with his mouth. Manuel had shown Kerryn the value of
taking one's time in the experience, and Kerryn had
stretched a good long suck on Manuel's cock and balls to
almost an hour. By the time they were done, Kerryn's jaw
ached a little bit and had cum four times.

The third time was Kerryn's most extreme adventure. After a
day of taking in the sunshine and just letting the
sensations of the planet wash over him, he had gone to the
bar and ordered his usual bourbon. It was late, the double
suns were setting and he had just pulled a light shirt on
when two young men approached him. Kerryn recognized them
from their position higher up on the beach.

They took chairs next to him, and laid back and closed their
eyes. Kerryn took the opportunity to study them briefly.
Nice bodies, both. Both had a nice sprinkling of chest hair,
more than Kerryn would ever have. He realized then that it
had been shaped that way, because it was too perfect for
reality. They were probably showing off. Well, he could too.
So Kerryn rolled over, letting the setting suns kiss his
barely covered butt. Yes, the thong bathing suit looked
very, very good on him. He grinned with the exposure. This
is my vacation, he thought, and so why not?

He heard a double-gasp next to him, and that sent him even
further in confidence. Very gently he scanned the nearest
one. What he found there was intoxicating. The nearest one
wanted to be fucked, badly, and his thoughts were filled
with the image of Kerryn's tight little swimsuit. When he
scanned the other one, he was focusing on his friend and
Kerryn together.

The two of them were communicating somehow. He could feel
the exchange, but there were no words spoken. So Kerryn
squinted one eyelid open and saw a series of hand signals go
back and forth. They wanted him, but were unsure how to
start. Kerryn grinned inside, and realized that two at once
would be interesting.

So he wiggled his butt just a little bit. Each time he did,
he could audibly hear the gasp. His own cock started to get
hard, and Kerryn knew that there was only just enough
bathing suit to cover that. Hmm! So he rolled over again,
face up now and showing off his incredible body as he very
carefully adjusted his suit around his cock. He sighed,
perhaps a little dramatically. And waited to see what would
happen. And his cock grew a little more.

"Everything OK over there?" That was the nearest one. Ice
broken!

"Yeah, I've just got this one little thing that's bothering
me."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. There are two really hot guys next to me, and I can't
keep my mind off them." Kerryn opened his eyes at the first
one and winked. Oh, he loved to be a slut!

The second one laughed, and the first smiled as well. "Well
now, we should probably see what we can do about that. I'm
David, and this is my very dear friend Richard."

"I'm Kerryn." They chatted a bit, innocent for now. The two
were sons of merchant familes, and after a profitable year
they were taking a vacation. Kerryn skimmed over the basics
of his background. David was definitely the near one, and
the bottom. Richard was the top.

Kerryn's stomach growled loudly at a quiet moment, and that
set them all laughing. So Kerryn decided that he needed
sustenance before anything else, and offered such. "Look's
like I've got to eat. Care to join me? I'll buy, since it is
my invitation."

They agreed, and the meal went very well. Each had put on a
little more clothing, and that had only helped define who
they were. Kerryn looked like the total beach hottie, with
his loose white shirt and light and loose pants. The others
wore slightly more clingy clothes. But the meal was good,
and warmth grew. The suns finished setting, and the decision
point was here.

It was David who brought it up. "Thanks, Kerryn, for a great
meal. We've only a short time, but I wish we could get to
know you much, much better." It was in the much that the
offer was made.

Kerryn nodded. "Same here. Any ideas on what to do next?"

The two looked at each other, and then looked at Kerryn.
Richard said, "We have no other plans tonight. How about
you?"

Shy. Not quite ready to jump. Kerryn laughed, and it relaxed
the whole situation. He wanted to fuck, and fuck soon.
"Well, there's a dance club nearby, but I suck at dance."
That drew some laughter. "I've heard that the boat ride they
give at night is really cool with the moons and the ocean
phosphorescence." He paused, and then looked at them
straight on. "Or, we could all go back to my suite and get
to know each other much, much better."

Richard grinned, and David's face lit up. "Really?"

Kerryn walked up to David, his eyes on fire, and placed his
hands on David's shoulders. "All honesty, all sincerety, all
openness, and all the way." David closed his eyes, and
Kerryn brushed his lips gently on David's.

"Oh god, that was hot." Richard's eyes were wide with
amusement. "Let's go!" And they sauntered down the boardwalk
to Kerryn's suite with the ocean view. It was cool,
comfortable and the king-size bed would definitely
accommodate them all.

And did it! On the way there, Kerryn had just let them know
that he was pretty versatile, but liked to take things
slowly. David pointed that, true to the scan, he loved to
bottom. Richard was also versatile, but he hadn't bottomed
in a while since David didn't like top. But once in the
room, the clothing came off and the three stood close
together. David was so turned on that Richard stood to one
side.

"Kerryn, I'll watch this one, to start at least. David needs
it bad." At which point he took a chair on one side, and sat
back, stroking his cock.

Kerryn held David, placing his mouth on his for the deep
kiss that Kerryn had been craving. David all but melted into
him, and it wasn't long before David was laying on the bed,
with Kerryn's mouth firmly and demandingly working its magic
on his cock. David had a nice one, and Kerryn was able to
give it the attention he needed. The moans from all three of
them gently echoed in the room.

David's first orgasm hit when Kerryn went all the way down
on his cock, burying his face in the other young man's skin,
the head well into his throat. At the same time, Kerryn felt
a very nice warm and wet sensation on his own cock, and knew
that Richard had joined the fray.

It was absolutely wild. The lube was passed around without a
word, and the oral play moved forward to become gently
probing fingers. Kerryn had not had this opportunity before,
and with David cooing in excitement he slowly inserted one
finger. He knew where the prostate was supposed to be, and
David's reaction was all that he hoped for when he found it.
Kerryn marveled at how smooth and yet softly hairy David
was. His thighs were toned and sleek, with his balls snug in
below the circumcised cock. Kerryn kept up his tongue action
on him with his finger now working to stretch David just a
little bit.

Kerryn felt a coolness on his own butt, and breathed deep as
a finger slid into him, expertly and gently, and then
without warning slid and caressed his own magic spot.
Sensation flooded him, and he moaned loudly over David's
cock. Richard chuckled softly, and began the expert
ministrations.

David spoke slowly. "Enjoy Richard. He knows exactly what to
do." A gasp, and then, "You're no slouch either. That feels
so incredible."

Two fingers entered Kerryn, and he knew that Richard's cock
would be next. Breaking off David, he swiveled around and
climbed over Richard to attack his cock with his mouth.
Kerryn knew he was very good with his mouth, and he made
sure Richard knew it.

Richard continued his ministrations, and suddenly David had
snuck between them and was working on Kerryn's cock with his
mouth. A three-way groan took place, and after a few minutes
they broke apart.

Kerryn looked at David, lust high in his eyes and David
flushed in anticipation. "I'm ready." Kerryn placed him on
his knees, and began again to lube his cock. Richard started
on his own, and Kerryn knew what was going to happen. The
thrill of that just about got him there. But he slowly
penetrated David, and the feelings through him were
incredible. David was gasping and moaning plenty, too. And
when he felt hands on his own waist, and the burn of
penetration into him, Kerryn entered that state of sustained
sexual bliss that he had never achieved before.

It was incredible. He looked forward and down on David, who
had grabbed the bed headboard and was moaning
uncontrollably. His long back was in front of Kerryn,
glistening slightly with excitement as the pure smooth skin
continued down to his waist. Kerryn's hands gripped that
waist firmly, right at the top of his hips as he drew
himself in and out of him. The halves of David's butt gently
brushed against him on each stroke, and the tight clenching
of his entrance sent waves of sensation through his cock. He
could do this forever, except for one thing: Richard.

Richard had his hands firmly wrapped around Kerryn's chest
and his mouth nibbling and licking his neck. He was also
deep inside Kerryn, and moaning, his hot breath cascading
down Kerryn's back as the tickle of hairs from Richard's
chest brought nerves to sensitivity. But what dominated it
all was the long, hard cock that also was drawing in and out
of him, and it was going faster. And faster. Richard was now
chanting "oh, fuck" over and over again, and Kerryn began to
speed up and go harder into David. There was an ideal
rhythm, where Richard and David were almost still and Kerryn
was the only one moving, and when they reached it all three
groaned loudly with excitement as Kerryn sped up, deeper and
faster, until finally Richard exclaimed and slammed into
Kerryn, who slammed into David, who cried out as all three
stood at the precipice of orgasm before falling off the
cliff of pleasure and into the rhythmic pumping sensations
that poured cum out of their venerable cocks. The unwinding
period was short, and Richard popped out of Kerryn first.
Kerryn then pulled out of David and crawled over on the bed
a little bit.

"That was the best." Richard spoke. "Kerryn, you are one hot
fuck."

"Hell, yes." That was David.

Kerryn grinned. "That was awesome."

Richard's eyebrows went up. "You're still hard, Kerryn."

"What can I say?"

Then it was David who spoke. "You can say you'll fuck
Richard as hard as you can. He likes that the second time."

"DAVID!"

"Well, it's true. You said so yourself that some of your
best fucks were when you bottomed after topping."

Richard looked at Kerryn longingly, and Kerryn took over.
"On your back, dude." Richard quickly rolled onto his back,
and presented himself.

"Just do it." Kerryn nodded at that, and now completely hard
and with a little more lube he pressed onward into Richard,
and with Richard groaning and gasping Kerryn drove himself
fully in with one long stroke. Richard was tight, even
tighter than David. With a grin he realized that Richard
must not get fucked very often. Double the pleasure, then.

"Oh god yes!" That was Richard. His hands automatically went
to his own cock as Kerryn slowly but firmly drove himself in
and out. "You're about the best I've ever had! Oh, mmmmm!"

Did he dare? Kerryn stopped for a moment, and stared right
at Richard. "I can make this the best fuck you will ever,
ever have." He wiggled a little, and Richard gasped as he
touched his prostate. "I guarantee it and it won't hurt." He
surged back in, and then whispered, "But you have to let
me."

He saw a flicker of concern cross his face, and then the
wanton pleasure returned. "OK. Do your best." And he held
his breath.

Kerryn rolled him on his side, so that one leg was at an
angle and the lower leg was straight. He slid along that
lower leg, his own balls rubbing along Richard's sensitive
inner thigh skin, and when he slid all the way in, he went
an inch deeper than before. Richard whimpered in pleasure,
and thought that this would be it.

But Kerryn knew what he wanted. Thoroughly impaling Richard,
he shot into Richard's mind, ignoring the things around him
and found the place where he could unlock the feelings. His
mental touch sizzled through Richard, who cried out and
started chanting "oh yes" over and over. Kerryn drove his
cock into him firmly and then with both a vicious and
delicious intensity as he stroked the mind in his grasp. He
felt Richard try to escape, and knew that it was time. With
one last push, he forced Richard over the edge and Richard's
entire body again tensed to incredible passion, and then
with a scream he came violently, thrashing about as Kerryn
pummeled his butt through his own orgasm.

David looked frightened, but Richard quickly settled that.
"Dave, its OK, god is it OK, oh fuck nothing has ever been
like that." He was breathing very hard, and Kerryn pulled
back and moved away. David immediately went over and began
stroking Richard, but turned to Kerryn.

"What did you to him?"

Kerryn grinned. "I'm half Betazoid. One of the talents we
have is the ability to heighten our partner's sexual
response. I don't usually do it this casually."

Richard had regained some normalcy. "I could feel you in my
mind. It was incredible." He got a little serious. "I've
been scanned by Betazoids before, and they usually pick up a
lot. What did you pick up from me?"

Kerryn shook his head. "Nothing. I ignored everything around
me and just went for that one receptive area. I've had some
training in precision." He smiled reassuringly. "I know
nothing more about you than I did before." Which was true.

Richard grinned. "Well, it was different. And yes, that was
probably the best fuck I will ever, ever have until I meet
another Betazoid with a bigger dick." And they laughed at
that one.

Dave shook his head. "I'll pass, thanks. It looked just a
bit too intense for me." He nudged Richard. "You've never
screamed before."

"I've never been porked in the mind before, either."

Relaxed, casually, they dressed and acknowledged their good-
byes. It was back to their normal lives for all three on the
next day. But when they had left, Kerryn went out into the
night and walked the beaches alone. He was sated, he was
rested, he was satisfied. David had been good, Richard had
been terrific, but being between them both had been
superlative. He filed that memory for future reference.

The next morning, he dressed again in his Guild uniform. It
felt a little funny after being nearly naked for so many
days, but that was to be expected. He looked in the mirror,
and saw a gorgeous sixteen year old young man with a number
of rank pins on his collar. Yes, he was a Ship Master,
Master Pilot, Master Technician. It would be his crowning
achievement to have a Starfleet acceptance waiting for him.
It had been so long, and he still had heard nothing.

When he checked out of the resort, he headed for the main
hangar. On the way he stopped for coffee, and there he saw
David and Richard. They were in smart business suits, and
looked very much the part. Grinning, he went over to greet
them.

"Good morning, I hope your night was pleasant."

They turned, and their jaws dropped, although David
recovered and laughed in glee. "David Anderson, Sales
Representative, and my associate, Richard Worring. And you
might be?"

"Ship Master Kerryn, Freighter's Guild. You look great in
clothes." And then he winked, knowing their reaction.

"So do you." David looked at Richard, and kicked him gently.
"Close your mouth." Turning back to Kerryn, he shrugged.
"Richard works for me. Go figure."

They chatted for a minute amiably, and then Kerryn had to be
off. "Best of luck, you two. I enjoyed your company
immensely."

"So did we." That was Richard. David rolled his eyes, and
said to Kerryn, "Can you hit him one more time with your
mind?"

Kerryn looked at Richard, and like lightning zinged in and
brushed the spot. Just once. But Richard had taken a
shuddering gasp, and breathed out, "Oh jeez! That was
close." In a voice dripping sarcasm, he turned to his boss
lover.  Thanks, Dave."

Dave shook his head. "It's that effective?"

Kerryn and Richard nodded. And then he departed for the main
hangar. Richard watched his ass for as long as he could see
it. And then David dragged him off to their transport.

Back in the Turian, the beaches miles and memories away, he
flew back to the comfort and familiarity of space. Totentanz
was two days out, which gave him enough time to pack and say
goodbye to his friends. Yes, he had friends on Delvin Six
North. Other pilots, techs, and their friends had all warmed
up to the young Ship Master. Kerryn had kind of settled into
the title, meaning that he was still Kerryn, but Ship Master
was more of a qualification. It did not change his humor,
his living style, or his drinking habits. Sex had completely
changed him, though. He shone with confidence, and together
with the rank he had earned made him visible.

Landing the Turian, and making his way back to the suite was
his chance to re-orient himself. He passed a dozen others
who welcomed him back and congratulated him on his tan,
usually with a wink. At least half of them knew he was gay,
and now they would conclude that he was experienced as well.
So be it. But upon entering his suite and bringing up his
comm system, the Guild thrust itself back on him.

He had had it on ten seconds when a priority flash message
had shown up from the Guild Director. Shit, thought Kerryn,
what could that be about?

At that very moment, the Guild Director and three of his
captains were in the Guild Office. They had a Disciplinary
Hearing to conduct, and in the Guild Regulations five
command-level officers were required to sit as a hearing
panel. The director and his three captains made four, so
they were one short. The list of available candidates
included every captain, base commander, and master in the
Guild, but they could only muster the four needed. The panel
had to be drawn from a list of Adjudicators, each who were
appointed for a one year term to serve on demand. The Guild
Director was ready to appoint the next one to walk on the
station in order to convene this hearing. Money would be
lost if it didn't happen soon. Big money.

They had just been reviewing the list one more time when a
chime came from their computer. Hoping beyond hope, one of
the candidates had just returned to the station. The Guild
Director looked at the name, first in surprise, then in
recognition that it belonged there, and then in great humor.
He had complete confidence in this individual. He laughed
his brisk laugh.

Captain Vexer looked up, irritated. "Now what?" He was the
one who was involved in the investigation, as one of his
crew was the accused.

The Guild Director smiled. "We have a fifth."

"Adjudicator?"

"No, but I'll appoint him on the spot to get on with this."

Captain Qualo's eyebrows raised. "Really?" She looked at the
other captain, Allianderoso, and clapped her hands once.
"Let's look at him."

The Director spoke. "Ship Master Kerryn, returning from
vacation planetside. He's on Totentanz."

"I thought Doryn ran Totentanz."

"He does." The Guild Director looked at him with a grin.
"This is his son."

Vexer threw his hands up. "Doryn can't be that old."

He was loving this, the Director realized. It felt good to
toy with his captains again. "He isn't. Ship Master Kerryn
is sixteen years old."

You could hear a pin drop. All three started talking, and
the words "mockery" were most prevalent. The Director rode
it through, patiently, until they were done. In his most
stentorian voice, he admonished them. "It isn't your
decision who is and who is not on the list, you know. I
myself conferred the Ship Mastery on him, high distinction
by the way, and was very very impressed. That title
qualifies him to be on the list, and MY decision will make
him an Adjudicator. Period."

The captains were aghast. The Director NEVER took this pose
with them. Mutely, they nodded, and the Director continued.
"Now, the nearest current Adjudicator on the list is a week
away. The nearest candidate other than Kerryn is eleven days
away. Doryn isn't qualified on the technical level. I am
open to any other alternatives."

Silence.

The Director smiled. "Done. I will speak with Kerryn
shortly. What's it going to be, Vexer? How much are you
losing an hour? Will you contest this?" He snickered. "It is
your right."

Vexer looked horrified. "No contest. I'll trust your
judgment."

"Good answer." And he dismissed them, and had his
receptionist get Kerryn up to the office as soon as
possible.

Back in his suite, Kerryn received the message and called
the receptionist, who in turn politely told him to get his
ass up to the Director's Office for official business that
could not wait. Still in his Guild uniform, he hurried out
and up to the office, and was shown immediately in to see
the Director.

Yes, the Director thought, he has been laid. It shows. And
he needed it. He greeted Kerryn, and asked him to sit, and
got right to the point.

"Ship Master, you are familiar with the role of Adjudicator
in our Guild?"

Kerryn nodded, perplexed. "Yes, sir. A one year term of
availability to sit on hearing panels and other procedural
processes."

"Well, we must conduct a hearing immediately. I myself am
one, plus three other captains. That means four. Anyone with
two master qualifications is eligible. Congratulations, you
are number five."

"I what?" Kerryn's mind spun. "Am I to understand that you
just appointed me an Adjudicator for the Guild?"

The Director grabbed Kerryn's arm and with his scanner,
updated the implant, grinning. "That's right. Be back here
in three hours. The others are Captain Vexer, Captain Qualo
and Captain Allianderosa. There is additional compensation
for being an Adjudicator, and your credit balance will be
updated weekly with the difference." He smiled. "You were
not my first choice, but you are qualified and I think you
will make an excellent Adjudicator." He stood. "Now, shoo.
I've got work to do."

"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir."

"Ha. Thank me later." And Kerryn found himself outside the
office.

Adjudicator? YIKES! He would need a dress uniform. He ran to
the Guild Supplier and bought a dress uniform in his size.
He would just have to hem it himself, and back in his suite
he did that. The rest of the time he paced in a mild panic,
until it was time and he went back to the Guild Office.

They showed him into another room, with a table with five
chairs in front and a small auditorium-style seating area
behind. It was about half full. The Security Officer
regarded Kerryn speculatively, but when shown his implant he
grinned and let him in. The other captains were there, and
they regarded Kerryn with distain. He took the end seat
designated with his name. Kerryn, Ship Master. That gave him
chills.

Captain Vexer was on the opposite end. He was a short, round
man with no hair whatsoever. He looked uncomfortable in his
formal uniform. He resembled a walrus having an attack of
nerves.

Captain Allianderoso was a tall, old man with much grey hair
but a twinkle in his eye. When his eye caught Kerryn's, he
bowed floridly. Kerryn smiled and inclined his head like he
had seen other captains do, but added a wink. He needed a
friend here, and Allianderoso might be one.

Captain Qualo was a quiet, reserved woman who looked like
she could have been the entire government. She regarded
Kerryn only thoughtfully, almost reprovingly. She must have
caught herself, because of all of them she alone came over
to talk to him.

"Congratulations, Adjudicator."

Kerryn felt like saying something about the negativity.
"Thank you. I hope to meet expectations today."

She sighed. "Don't mind me. I am old enough to be your
mother, and I don't like long hair on men. Other than that,
you should do fine. This is a fairly clear case, as you will
see."

"Thanks." He impishly batted his eyes at her. Something
about this captain brought out the kid in him.

She rolled her eyes. "I thought as much." And she smiled.
"You'll do just fine."

The Director came in, sat down, and convened the hearing.
The accused, a Master Technician had allowed a cargo
mounting system to degrade and break off, causing the cargo
to work lose and break free into space. It ruptured, and
several million credits of goods were scattered at warp
speed. The bracketing had been recovered and analyzed, and
the report was given to the panel. The accused stood, stony
faced, as the case mounted against him.

Something nagged at Kerryn. "May I see the report, please?"

Vexer looked daggers at him, but passed him the report.
Kerryn skimmed through it, as Vexer made a comment that they
didn't have all day. The Director, who was watching Kerryn
with interest, though, quelled that.

He found what he was looking for. The fatigue cracking had
many many minute fissures. It just happened to be the
largest one that unzipped. The Master Technician, true
should have caught this, but so also should have routine
maintenance inspections. Damn. Fliers versus techs again. He
closed the report with a sharp snap.

The Director saw that he was pissed. Here go the fireworks,
he thought. Wonder what he found? "Adjucator Five, you have
a concern."

"Yes, Director." Kerryn spoke clearly and slowly. "The
report shows a large number of crazing and fissures around
this bracket joint. It appears that the bracket broke loose
because the largest of these fissures unzipped under load."
He put down the report. "That many fissures do not develop
over a period of weeks, and would be caught under routine
maintenance inspections for safety. Per Guild regulations
those inspections are compulsory according to a schedule. I
would like to know the date and inspection record for the
bracketing before continuing."

The panel was stunned. Vexer turned absolutely purple.
Allianderosa looked surprised, but he nodded. Qualo's eyes
were wide, but she too nodded. "An interesting observation,
Adjudicator Five."

The Director spoke. "Records officer, please report the
information requested."

There was a pause, and some muttering, and then the Records
Officer read back the computer report. "Report shows active
crazing around the bracketing. Rework recommended in the
near future. The latest report is dated two years and four
months ago."

Muttering around the room, and before Vexer could react, the
Director stood. "Quiet, please in the audience. Guild
Regulations require annual safety inspections. It would seem
that you, Captain Vexer, were negligent in obtaining the
proper inspections. Two and a half years ago there is a
rework notice, and you failed to follow up on it."

"I . I . I wasn't fully aware at the time -"

The Director cut him off. "The facts state themselves,
captain." He looked at Kerryn. "Good catch. Justice will be
served here after all." He banged a gavel. "The panel is in
recess, but I want to meet with all the adjudicators
informally afterwards in my office. Except you, Captain
Vexer." And he quickly departed.

Kerryn saw the Master Technician look at him and gulp. He
knew he would get some of the blame, but at least not all of
it. This could have ended his career. With that moment,
Kerryn took a formal dislike to being an adjudicator. The
weight of the decisions were too large for him. What if he
hadn't spoken up?

He made his way to the office, and passed Vexer on the way.
He looked anxious, but regarded Kerryn with a modicum of
respect. Kerryn remained neutral, and entered the office
with the others. The door closed, and the Director regarded
him thoughtfully.

"Well, Kerryn, you are off to an interesting start. Did
anyone else catch that?"  Shakes of the heads. "Well, well,
well. Vexer blew off his advice, and blew off the
inspection. There was no record of objection by the Master
Technician. Shall we split the fault?"

Allianderosa nodded. Qualo nodded. Kerryn nodded. The
Director nodded, and he commented, "Four yes, one abstain.
Now, to the split. Any ideas?"

"Fifty fifty." That was Allianderosa.

Qualo didn't look happy, but said, "That's one way."

"Kerryn?"

Kerryn shrugged. "Maybe I am being a purist, but Captain
Vexer knew about that report. I'd say there are three
issues. First, the tech didn't catch it. Second, Captain
Vexer didn't follow procedure on the routine safety
inspections. Third, Captain Vexer knew about the report and
chose not to act on it. That makes two thirds the fault on
Captain Vexer, and one third on the tech. Any one of those
faults corrected and this problem wouldn't have happened."

The Director stared at him. It made perfect sense. "Perhaps
adjudicators are not being formal enough in their judgment.
Kerryn, that was perfect. Any opposed?"

The other captains shook their heads, and regarded Kerryn
with respect. The Director nodded, and smiled at Kerryn.
"Didn't I say you were formidable, and one to be reckoned
with?" He turned to the others. "Thank you all. As a
reminder, you may not discuss these deliberations with
anyone other than we in this room. That means no discussing
this with Vexer. My job is to take it from here." And he
showed them out.

The other adjudicators were quickly accosted by the crowd,
but Kerryn managed to slip through and down to his suite
again. So that was how the Guild worked. All he did was try
to find the truth. And then he realized that he could have
scanned the accused and the guilty captain. Leave that for
next time.

Back in the suite, he finished packing. He checked his
credit balance to make sure he could cover the suite, and
was amazed to find that the Guild had deposited fifty
thousand credits in his account, as well as a five hundred
credit per week retainer. Maybe being an adjudicator wasn't
so bad.

When Totentanz arrived, he and his dad had a joyous reunion.
Doryn was amazed at how much Kerryn had changed in the
couple of weeks. He was bursting with pride at the
Adjudicator appointment, and at the same time Kerryn was
absolutely itching to get his hands back on his beloved
Totentanz.

Over a very nice dinner at the station, Doryn was watching
his incredible son. "You know, Kerryn, Totentanz is going to
be a little dull after all this. It's just me, cargo, and
the ship. You've been moving in social circles for a while."

Kerryn nodded. "I know. I think I am looking forward to it,
though. I love space."

Doryn broached the subject. "It isn't good for a sex life."

Kerryn laughed. "Dad, I've had enough sex for a year." And
then he caught himself, blushed for a bit, but then
shrugged.

"Really?"

"Yeah, really."

"How so?"

"Well, you know when I got back here before going dirtside?"
His dad nodded. "I had just gotten my title, and was
circulating a bit when I got hit with the Frenzy."

Doryn nearly fell off his chair. "Already?"

Kerryn nodded. "I was terrified. But she was a handsome
woman, an ambassador or government official of some rank,
and she knew just what to do." He described in general
terms, and Doryn nodded, having heard about it from Analee.

"Sounds like you got a lot out of it."

Kerryn laughed. "Well, I certainly got a lot of practice
real fast." And then the shadow crossed his face. "Dad, she
was so incredibly strong in the mind. But the last time, I
figured what the hell, so I jumped into her mind and put
such a lock on her that she couldn't break free. Couldn't,
not at all. And when it was over she showed me so much about
the mental thing." He sighed. "I owe her plenty."

Doryn had tears in his eyes. "I had always wondered how I
was going to get you educated with your mental skills. I'm
so lucky that she took care of that for you."

Kerryn just kept going. "After that, well I went down for my
vacation. I promised myself that anyone who wanted sex from
me would get it. After all that, I've had enough for a
little while."

"Until tomorrow?" That brought a laugh.

They went over the year's schedule together. Doryn had added
a social stop every three months, since Kerryn was now an
appointed Adjudicator and they both wanted more social time.
Then, departing Delvin Six North, they headed out deep into
the Aurigaen Belt for the four month run of cargo.

Kerryn rejoiced in it. The wild space, tuning and
maintaining the engines, and the fact that he outranked his
father all coalesced together so that they worked shifts in
cooperation. Doryn was aging, and his alertness wasn't what
it always had been.

For Kerryn, the stops in the Belt were no longer cargo loads
and unloads. They were visits to the bar, renewal of old
acquaintances, and in one case out on Dulzian IV a contest.
Apparently Doryn was feeling his age, and issued a unique
challenge to Kerryn.

"Son, you're a man now."

"Really? I hadn't noticed."

Doryn laughed. "Well, Dulzian IV is a special place. I'd
like to challenge you to a special bet."

"Terms?"

"Principal ownership of Totentanz."

Kerryn's jaw dropped. "You've got to be kidding."

Doryn shook his head. "No. Look at it for real. I love this
ship. But I'm tired. You outrank me, you now fly her better
than I do, and you can maintain her much better than I can.
I have retirement credit stored, and while I think it is
still some years yet, rather than a big hullabaloo over
ownership transfer I'd rather you won her in a bet."

"Why?"

Doryn grinned. "Surely it is elementary."

"So we don't have to pay sales tax?"

They laughed hard on that one. "No, to ensure your
credibility in the future."

Kerryn could see that. "OK. Hypothetically, what is the
bet?"

"First one to get laid here at Dulzian IV gets ownership."

Kerryn's jaw dropped again. "You want to go out, pick
someone up, and get laid? As in like a race?"

"Yup."

Kerryn took on a crafty look. "Does buying sex count?"

"No prostitutes."

"You have someone in mind for yourself? I'm coming in cold,
remember."

Doryn felt the negotiation start. "I have the benefit of
reputation, yes, and my experience. But stamina and
attractiveness are well in your favor, I think."

"Oral sex count? Anal sex? Or does it have to be straight
fucking?"

Doryn laughed again. His son was apparently very
experienced. "No oral, yes anal. Fuck is actually a good
word. First one to fuck wins the ship."

Kerryn took a serious moment. "You aren't going to throw the
bet, are you?"

Doryn smiled. "I was, but I like a healthy competition. So
no, I'm not going to just throw the bet."

Kerryn laughed. "You are on, dad!" And they shook hands.

***

Kerryn found himself holding a violently shaking Jacen. But
before he could wonder what happened, Jacen had cracked up
and doubled over in laughter. Tears streamed from his eyes,
and finally he got some control and grinned at Kerryn.

"You got Totentanz in a bet as to who got laid first?"

Kerryn nodded. "Yes sir!"

"That must have been one hell of a lay."

Kerryn grinned. "Actually, it wasn't quite as expected,
although I did make a pass at my dad just in case."

Jacen's eyes bugged out. "Did he agree?"

"No. But it caught me off guard, just the same."

Jacen lay back down. "Continue!" And Kerryn eased his mind
back into that time.

***

Now, Kerryn had never gone out on a mission for sex. He was
sure his father had, so that was to his advantage. But his
vacation experience had been priceless in that way. He knew
what to do. He was not sure how to capture the initial
interests of his victim? Subject? Target was more likely. He
studied the Dulzian IV culture reference. Lots of bars on
the station. He picked several that were attended by the
younger crowds, and had provocative atmospheres. He dressed
carefully, choosing a brown outfit again that was distinctly
revealing on his lower half while accentuating the upper
half. His hair he brushed and brushed. And when he met his
father at the docking port, Doryn was amazed at what a hot
young stud his son was.

Kerryn was surprised at how nice Doryn cleaned up. He had
dressed in black, and was still in good shape although his
hair was graying. He had cultivated the experienced, I-can-
make-your-dreams-come-true look for those looking for an
experienced lover. They sized each other up, and Kerryn then
had the audacity to make his dad a humorous offer.

"You know, Dad, you are hot enough that I could fuck you.
Who would win then?"

Doryn had laughed. "Whoever topped." He winked at Kerryn.
"I'm not totally inexperienced there either, you know." And
that sent Kerryn's mind reeling. His Dad, butt-fucking?
Inconceivable!

They left, and went their separate ways. Kerryn went to the
first bar, and it was so disgusting he left immediately. The
second one was almost as bad. By the time he got to the
fifth bar, Kerryn had to rethink whether a fuck here was
possible without catching a disease.

So, he took the opposite approach. He found some attractive
people, and followed them. They led him to a trendy bar, all
techno, and Kerryn would not have any of that. He gave up.
Dulzian IV had a flight bar, the usual sort where Kerryn
would go, and so he went in for a while.

This was his kind of place. Fliers, techs, various people
who were not here to play but here to relax. He got his
regular bourbon, and joined in a conversation about
Cardassian tactics. It was then that a young brunette tech
had joined next to the group, and was looking kind of down.
Kerryn felt bad, and moved next to her.

"Hi. Saw you come in. Everything OK?"

She looked tired. "Yes and no. I came in to take a break. My
ship is having problems."

"Let me buy you a drink. Then tell me about it. What'll you
have?"

"Tangueray and soda." Kerryn signaled the bartender, and the
brunette immersed herself in it for a moment. Kerryn watched
her. She was pretty, perhaps mid twenties. Large eyes, but
sparky. When she smiled at him, everything lit up.

"I'm Kerryn, by the way, of the freighter Totentanz."

"Tanya Johnson, of the Palos Verde. I'm the lead tech, but
she's such a hodgepodge of systems that this one has me
baffled."

"Oh? I'm a Ship Master. Maybe I can help."

"This is what it is telling me." And she rattled off some
phonetics with a terrible accent. "I haven't any idea what
that actually is."

Kerryn laughed. "It's Romulan." And he repeated what she
said, with correct pronunciation. "It means that your power
grid is fused in several quadrants."

"Damn." She looked at him carefully, as if for the first
time. He was gorgeous. Young, too, and a Ship Master? "I
don't suppose you would like to come over and take a look?"

He finished his bourbon. Screw the bet. "Let's go. I could
use a good technical problem." And they left together.

The Palos Verde was fairly large, and it was a hodgepodge.
Together they went through the diagnostics, and Kerryn's
Romulan was invaluable. They replaced the power grid
together, and Kerryn swept through the rest of the ship
systems, which were in very good shape. It was just this one
spot. The last coupling was in an access tube, and they both
had crawled into it in order to get to the coupling.

Fate struck. Gotta love fate! Access tubes are slippery, and
Tanya slipped. Her hand came down on his chest, and her head
came down on his cock. From all the movement, Kerryn was
half hard already, but this sudden proximity brought on a
full raging erection. Which, of course, was what his
clothing was designed to show off.

"Wow, I guess you are happy to see me, or does tech do that
to you?"

Kerryn laughed a little awkwardly. "Well, I am happy to be
with you."

The close proximity, pheremones, something changed at that
moment, and Tanya moved her head slightly and raised one
hand to stroke his cock. "Oh Kerryn, it's huge! And it's
been such a long time for me." Her other hand reached over
and stroked his butt, also in clothing designed to show it
off, and that caused a long moan from Kerryn.

"Do you mind me doing that, Kerryn?"

He shook his head. "Oh no, although I never would have
thought of a Jeffries tube for it."

She laughed a wicked laugh. "So you aren't a virgin. I think
I know how to thank you for your help tonight." And she gave
him a look of pure lust.

Kerryn's heart raced. "I think we should be able to freely
thank each other." He winked at her, and gave her his best
smile.

They slid out of the tube, and while she pulled on his arm
he pulled her back to the console. "Come on, let's just make
sure its right, OK?"

She pouted, but an analysis came up all green. The instant
it was all green, Kerryn turned, took her in his arms, and
greedily kissed her. She responded instantly, and they made
out wildly in Engineering. Tanya finally broke the kiss,
panting.

"Follow me. There are cameras in here and we aren't putting
on a show."

Kerryn laughed, and followed quickly. "At least not without
selling tickets."

They made it to her cabin, and the clothes came off and she
tackled him. There was no foreplay, just pure fucking
energy. They all but wrestled on the bed, and Kerryn finally
decided to lose as she pinned his shoulders, her breast
hanging right in front of his mouth. He grabbed it with his
tongue, and she responded by leaning lower. Kerryn felt the
hot wetness surround his cock, and knew that he was now deep
inside her. But oh, she was generating such feelings down
there as she rocked back and forth. She was lithe, muscular
and forty years younger than Lwaxana, and every bit of it
showed. He gave himself into the experience, and let her top
him savagely.

He felt her orgasm, felt her relax from the exertion and
then laughing he rolled her over onto her back, without ever
leaving her warm haven. He wanted his fuck. And so he slid
her legs up over his chest, his hands gripped her breasts
and he began his slow thrusts in, out, over and over. She
started breathing hard again, and he moved his hands back to
her thighs, pushing her down even further. This caused her
whole opening to contract, gripping him even tighter as it
caressed the underside of his cock. He could feel the base
under his cock come in contact with the skin just above her
other entrance, and the complete sensation was filling him
with satisfaction when she cried out in a second orgasm, and
her muscles began gripping him strongly and rhythmically.
Kerryn gave one final push deep inside, and succumbed to his
own climax. Releasing her slowly, he leaned forward and
kissed her gently as they squelched apart.

She opened her eyes to find him smiling at her. Any
awkwardness vanished, and they giggled slightly. Tanya broke
the silence first. "Well, I would call this night a definite
success."

"Me too. Thanks, by the way. I really needed that."

"So did I. You're awfully experienced for what, eighteen?"

"Sixteen."

"Crap. I almost robbed the cradle."

"I've read a lot. And I certainly am no virgin."

"That's for sure."

Kerryn then snickered slightly. "And neither are you."

"Now THAT's for sure!" And they laughed, separated and
Kerryn started to dress.

Her comm unit beeped, and she jumped into an informal
outfit. "I hate to do this to you, but you are going to have
to run. Now that the systems are back online, they want to
leave pronto."

"Parting is such sweet sorrow."

She laughed, and they sprinted to the docking port. Kerryn
was the last one out, and he blew her a kiss as they sealed
the port. Wow. But he had loved it. Trading tech for a fuck.
What a tramp he was! Talk about fuck and run.

Fuck.

He fucked.

He fucked on Dulzian IV.

His father had bet him that whoever fucked first on Dulzian
IV would have ownership of Totentanz.

Elated terror ripped through Kerryn as that thought settled
in. He had given up on the bet to help out Tanya, and ended
up in her bed. Proof? His underwear still had vaginal
secretions and his cum on it in trace amounts, he was sure.
Incredibly bizarre, but his sex-stained underwear was worth
about twenty million credits right now.

He noted the time, just in case, and with a wide, wide grin
he sauntered back to the ship. He traversed the docking port
and aimed towards his father's cabin. The light was on, and
his dad was in there. Alone. Dressed. What did this mean?

Doryn looked up at his son. They stood there, looking at
each other. Kerryn's hair was a mess. His clothes were OK,
but rumpled. Could it have actually happened?

Kerryn decided to play. "So Dad, get any tonight?"

"Sad to say, no, my son. Lots of chatter, but no one looking
for an old guy like me." He grinned. "It's just as well,
though. I tried, but next time I may just throw the bet."

"Dad, you don't have to."

Doryn nodded. "That's my choice. I know what my plan is.
I'll throw it if I want to."

Kerryn came over, grinning ear to ear, and said, "Dad, you
won't have to." And the aroma of sex eased its way over to
Doryn. And that was what woke him up.

"You got laid."

"Yup."

"Son of a bitch." Doryn grinned, and jumped up. "Ha! I had
hoped you could do it!" He hugged Kerryn tightly, and then
with a father's camaraderie asked, "How? How did you do it?"

"Luck." He told him how he scouted out the bars, and finally
gave up and went to the flight bar. He told him how he met
the frustrated tech, decided to forget the bet tonight, and
how his Romulan helped them solve their problem. He
humorously described how she had slipped, and grabbed him to
hold on, thus revealing his erection. "Dad, she was so
excited we nearly did it in the Jeffries tube right there.
It was luck, and we both were pretty desperate." He laughed.
"I didn't even think about the bet until I was on my way
back and I had realized what happened."

"She's yours now, Kerryn. Fair and square. We'll do the
paperwork tomorrow."

"Are you sure, Dad?"

Doryn nodded. "Absolutely."

 And that was how Totentanz received its last owner. No
longer Ship Master on Totentanz, but Ship Master OF
Totentanz. The Guild officials had grinned as Doryn proudly
disclosed the terms of the bet, which was not necessary but
it still made for a great story. While most remembered that
Kerryn's cock had bought him his ship, a few remembered that
it was an act of tech and kindness that enabled that to
happen.

Very little changed. Doryn showed Kerryn the accounts, and
more of his operational education came into play. With
Totentanz came an escrow account of several million credits,
and without his father noticing Kerryn immediately doubled
the contribution from their cargo runs into his father's
retirement account. They laughed, they joked, and during the
rest of the Aurigaen Belt run Kerryn assumed all the
responsibilities of Totentanz. He truly was effective, even
at the young age of sixteen, but when one has lived the
process nearly one's whole life, the transition of
responsibility isn't that hard.

And still, the cold silence of disinterest filled the void
between Kerryn and Starfleet.

It was six months after Kerryn had been declared Ship
Master, and four months after his ownership of Totentanz
that Doryn and Kerryn were in a flight bar at Koppel IV.
They had just picked up cargo, and were listening to the
route information. The normal chatter around the pilots and
owners was unusually subdued this time. And with good
reason. Cardassia was growing more hostile.

 The situation was grave. Major routes that had been close
to the Cardassian Neutral Zone were now risky. Cardassian
warships had been seen in greater numbers, and while it did
not confirm anything, Kerryn and anyone who had studied
Cardassian tactics knew that there would be a major conflict
soon. Starfleet had also increased its presence here, and
that alone was credible enough to be wary.

Doryn and Kerryn had left the bar, uneasy. They had just
cleared the set of colonies closest to the Neutral Zone.
Space was tense, and there was one more stop before back to
Delvin Six. This pass they had made it through, but the next
one was even more in question now.  Doryn realized that he
and Kerryn were vulnerable, and he had to assess where his
son stood on this. If they had to react, they had to be of
one mind, and Kerryn was the boss now. At dinner that night,
Doryn brought it up.

"Kerryn, we need to discuss something very important."

Kerryn leaned back, and folded his hands. "OK."

"What will Totentanz do when the Guild is attacked?" As
Kerryn reacted, he put his hands up. "I'm talking in
general. You know the risks. We aren't big and powerful. We
are the best that we can be, thanks to you, but a mouse is
still a mouse, and many mice run away." His eyes blazed at
his son, challenging him to take stand on this. "You own the
ship. Will we run, or fight?"

Kerryn breathed deeply. What was his father asking? He saw
for a moment a fierce Guild veteran and wily freighter ready
to die for the Guild. But was he? He was only a short time
from his planned retirement, and to have that ripped away
because of Cardassia? His father changed then into an old
man, tired and looking for a desperate hope that he might
make it there someday.

But the Guild was everything to them. Everything! And it
protects its members. His War School teachers had emphasized
the utility of a small but well-placed weapon as well as the
domination by firepower. Anger flooded Kerryn at the thought
of running, but there was a time for running. He carefully
chose his words.

"We fight, Doryn, as long as we can make a difference." Some
of the anger flooded out, and he bit off wryly, "But I am
not taking on the Cardassian Fleet alone."

Doryn nodded. "My thoughts exactly." And then he continued,
"People die, son. They die of age, of disease, and often
enough they die making a difference. It could be you or me,
or anyone. Until Cardassia calms down a bit, being in space
is just a bit dangerous."

Kerryn then voiced his own fear. "Dad, something's going to
break out soon. Everyone can feel it. I just hope that I
don't have to choose between fighting or fleeing."

Doryn smiled. "Whatever you choose, I know it would be the
right decision." And a little of the old confidence was
restored to both of them. Nevertheless, Kerryn checked the
shields constantly.

Their last stop was a good-sized freighter base at Rana 7.
Rana 7 would go down in the Guild history as the worst
massacre of Guild men, women, children, families, and less
importantly, ships and cargo. The Cardassians apparently
needed to make a statement, and they did so.

It was as if time stood still and that dinner conversation
echoed back to Kerryn as he saw four large Cardassian
warships drop out of warp. Three went after the base, and
fourth and largest began hammering the hell out of the
freighter ships in its path. Within seconds the freighters
opened fire on the Cardassians with everything they had, but
for four warships this would barely scratch a dent.

Kerryn and Doryn were small, but they let loose with phasers
and the ion cannon. Kerryn focused the firepower on the
bridges of the warship, and the shields glowed red with
energy. They were making a difference, and the surge of
indignation and wrath was hot in their minds.

But it was too much for Totentanz. She blazed like a hornet,
but her shields faltered and with a resonant shudder one of
her shield generators went down.

"DAD! We've lost the primary shield generator!"

Doryn had seen his son's strategy. "I'll keep the attack up;
you go get to that generator!"

Kerryn looked back, a prickling on his scalp. "Dad, you take
damn care of yourself, OK?"

"I will!"

Kerryn flew down the stairs, past the cargo bay and into the
Propulsion unit. Sure enough, the shield generator had
overloaded. He pulled out a back-up control board, slammed
it in and reset the generator. They were seconds away from
being protected as the generator charged.

Suddenly, a massive shearing screeching sound filled the
room and the emergency force fields kicked in as Totentanz
spun wildly out of control. It was all Kerryn could do to
climb over to the emergency attitude controls and get their
inertial control back. SHIT! What had slammed them so hard
to do that? As he worked their stability, he pounded the
comm button.

"DAD! We've lost stabilization! I'm working on it!" But
there was silence at the other end. Comms must be down. He
worked the controls, and slowly the ship stopped spinning.
Visual sensors were down, but tactical was up. And the only
set of green lights in the entire section was for the Ion
Cannon. He saw the massive Cardassian ship slide by him, and
then like a miracle five new ships dropped out of warp and
started blazing into the Cardassians!

The symbols on his display showed that Starfleet had
arrived. But they were fighting all wrong. This was becoming
a protracted battle. Minutes ticked by, and he could not get
the comms unit back up. A glance at tactical, though and he
saw it. Starfleet was being hit hard, but the Cardassian had
re-allocated his rear shields. One look at the carnage on
tactical and Kerryn knew what he could do. He set the Ion
Cannon charging to maximum power.

Attitude control was shot. But a glance up into the hangar
above showed that his Turian was intact! Pulling panels out,
and hooking up a diagnostic conduit from the Turian to the
maneuvering thrusters, he climbed up into his little ship,
set it in a test mode, and very gently touched the controls.
Totentanz's thrusters fired haphazardly, but Kerryn could
figure out how to aim. By staring down at the tactical
display on the deck below and touching the controls, he
slowly aimed his only weapon at the now-vulnerable
Cardassian. Once they noticed him, they would crush him like
a bug, but the fire of his father's words seared through
him. One touch, and they were aligned for about twenty
seconds.

He jumped down, keyed in the emergency shutdown sequence for
the singularity core, ran to the Ion Cannon controls which
reported 105% charge, lifted the manual cover and pressed
the button.

"Fuck you, assholes."

All the lights went out except the emergency lights. Kerryn
felt the rumble of discharge, and he watched on tactical as
the Ion Cannon slammed its entire power, fusing itself solid
in the process. But the energy ripped across space, and
shredded its way right into the main engine cores of the
Cardassian. His studies had told him that they were arrogant
as a culture, and that their engine systems were most
vulnerable when the ship was unshielded. Kerryn grinned in
satisfaction as he scored the direct hit. He may be a bug,
and about to be squashed, but he had stung and he hoped it
had hurt.

Tactical displays did not do it justice. What they did not
see was that the entire engine section overloaded and
detonated, severing the whole drive unit from the Cardassian
main body and sending it hurtling off into the void. Devoid
of its power source, the main section of the Cardassian ship
was quickly pummeled into wreckage, and the Starfleet ships
went to join the rest of the conflict. Now with more
Starfleet and fewer Cardassians, the tide of the battle
turned, and when the second Cardassian was destroyed the
other two fled with heavy damage. Rana 7 was won, but at
huge cost.

Totentanz was a mess. Life support was barely up. Kerryn
stood, lights flashing. He worked his way forward, slowly.
Everything was down. He tried to open one of the safety
doors, but it showed red. That meant decompression. Not
good. He began to worry. How would he get to his dad?

He went around the port side and found he could get a bit
further forward. But it was there, looking out the window at
the cargo bays ripped apart with ore flung in all
directions, that he saw with horror what had actually
happened. The Navigation deck was gone. All that was left
were bits of twisted metal. And his father had been on the
Navigation deck.

Desperately he flung his mind out, searching for a trace, a
hint, a thought of Doryn. Maybe the deck was just cut off,
and still pressurized! But empty space echoed back at him.
He ran back to the Turian, tears flowing and unable to
speak, and flung himself into it and it out into space. With
its fully functioning systems, Kerryn finally realized the
nightmare in space at Rana 7. Dozens of freighters drifted
idly nearby.

Opening an all channel communication, he finally spoke.
"Totentanz to Master Pilot Doryn. P-p-please come in." And
again, silence echoed in space.

He saw it, then. A few shreds of hull plating, but he had
welded them enough times that he knew now that the Nav deck
had been destroyed, and his father had died instantly with
it. Make a difference, they had decided. Well, they did, but
the price! Slowly going numb, Kerryn just sat there in his
Turian, the wreck of his fathers ship - no, his ship -
floating idly below him, surrounded by dozens of friends in
similar states. He could not go on. Not alone. The tears ran
silently down his face. He was alone. Truly alone.

***

Jacen was sobbing again. Kerryn felt him as they nestled
together. He was again filled with the sorrow and the fierce
defiance that had let him continue. He stroked Jacen slowly,
and waited for him to breathe more evenly.

"I'm so sorry."

"We knew the risks. Space is not always a nice place. But
Rana 7 was a tragedy beyond any comparison. When I built
this station, I made sure it would never, ever happen here."

"How did you go on?"

Kerryn sighed. "Work. Repairs were going to be very
expensive. A freighter needs cargo to survive."

Jacen nodded, and settled back in. "I think we can go on,
now."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Definitely."

***

He might have stayed that way for hours or days. But
Starfleet had begun mopping up the survivors, and his comm
unit cackled.

"USS Hood to Turian Zephyr. Please respond."

Kerryn stirred, and found his voice. "Hood, this is Ship
Master Kerryn of the Freighter Totentanz." What else could
he say? "How may I help you?"

"We are collecting survivors. Are you injured?"

"No."

The Hood communications officer sympathized. Shock would set
in. Get him landed and then deal with it. "Please vector
your ship to these coordinates."

"My ship is disabled."

"Please vector the Turian Zephyr to these coordinates." A
set of figures showed up.

"OK." He transmitted Totentanz's beacon enabler to show that
she was not for salvage but still his, and slowly aimed his
way over to the coordinates. The Hood was an Excelsior class
starship with a large shuttle bay, and he successfully
landed. Upon his arrival, though, three med techs and a
security officer took him immediately aside.

"Wait." He ran back to the Turian, and spoke the deny access
code in Romulan, and the little ship shut down. He then
returned to them, and they escorted him to Sickbay.

That was the last he remembered for a while. His mind shut
down. His father was dead, his ship destroyed. Hundreds of
others were killed, and dozens of freighters disabled. He
lay on their bed in numb shock for an interminable amount of
time, until an orderly came over.

"Sir, I am sorry to ask this, but I must. Can you list any
of your crew that are known deceased?"

Kerryn's eyes filled, but he nodded. "My father. Master
Pilot Doryn." Panic seized him. "Can I see the list?"

The orderly handed it over, and he scanned names. Thomas and
Mike were not there. But his grief was complete when he saw
the names of Illiar, Pelossi, and he began to sob at the
sight of Ramon's name. His Imzadi and his father, gone. He
didn't see the orderly signal the nurse, nor the blessed
hypospray send him to oblivion.

Some hours later, he woke. He remembered it all, but somehow
it was there but not there. The orderly came in, nodded, and
spoke to him gently.

"Sir, there is going to be a mass memorial gathering
shortly. Do you think you can attend?"

Kerryn nodded. He found his voice, then. "Yes. I owe them
that much." He stood, and found that he was only a little
shaky. "Can someone escort me?"

A young man entered, in a red uniform. Security. Sheesh.
Like he was a threat. "Right this way."

The memorial was poignant. They stood in the Hood's shuttle
hangar, overlooking space, the carnage, and they read the
names of those lost. A tear ran down his face for Ramon, and
again for Illiar. For his father he stood tall and defiant,
not willing to give in anymore to the pain. They had decided
to make a difference. They had, however small, and Doryn
would have thought it worth it.

The Guild Director heard Doryn's name, and his heart fell
but his eyes searched the crowd when he didn't hear Kerryn's
name. He found him then, on the side, with a cold fury in
his eyes. And suddenly, he knew. Kerryn had been the one to
take out the flagship from behind. Pride in the young man,
pride in the Guild raced through the director like it had
not in a long time.

The memorial finished, and the people began to filter out.
Kerryn suddenly realized that he had a livelihood to
continue, and his ship was wrecked. Damn! He literally ran
to the nearest replicator, collected some food, and within
five minutes was airborne and exited the Hood's shuttle bay.
After this, parts were going to be a premium and he
desperately needed a new deck for Totentanz.

Totentanz was too big for the Turian to tow. So instead, he
set course at his little warp two and eleven hours later he
landed at Delvin Six North. Kerryn immediately ran to see
his friend Derrigan in Salvage.

Derrigan was surprised to see Kerryn. "Hey, Kerryn! I
thought you were holed up at Rana 7. What a tragedy!"

Kerryn nodded. "Totentanz is pretty shot. I need a new Nav
deck. Romulan would be good."

Derrigan laughed. "Good luck. Let me see what I have." They
ran through the inventory, and it was pretty bad. Most of
the good stuff had been reserved by the big guys. But
something caught his eye.

"Kerryn, you should consider this. Lot 477." He turned the
screen, and showed a view of a round saucer-like deck, two
decks deep. "Duranium alloy hull, systems intact but
untested. They're antique. But this bridge is built like a
tank." He winked. "It's ex-Starfleet."

Kerryn looked. "Bridge? It looks like Constitution class
from Starfleet." He glanced at the interior views, with the
silver walls and black control panels. The blocky command
chair stood proudly in the center, but the whole thing was
scored. "Will it pressurize?"

Derrigan nodded. "What do you think?"

Kerryn stared at it. He had studied Federation engineering.
The systems would adapt to Totentanz OK. Get rid of the
turbolift, move things around a bit. "How much?"

"Two million."

The negotiation began. "For THAT? Try again." And they
bickered. Finally though, Kerryn and Derrigan hit he crux.

"Seven fifty, and that's it."

Kerryn sighed. "If it's been around so long, why are you
asking so much for it?"

Derrigan smiled. "Supply and demand, my friend. Now, I have
this Ferengi sweetie here that -"

"OK! Seven fifty it is."

"Finance?"

"Short term. I'm due insurance."

They worked out the details, and Kerryn had his Nav deck. He
booked an escort to move it for him, and donning a space
suit and welder in hand he began the tedious task of
marrying the bridge to Totentanz. There was enough scrap
left around Rana 7 that he liberally grabbed and used
structural members and interfaces. Two weeks of welding, and
the bridge was sound and secure. He then reactivated the
singularity core on Totentanz, and slowly moved her back to
Delvin Six. The next three months consisted of refitting the
bridge with compatible systems, and repairs on Totentanz to
bring her back to cargo-worthiness. He had a goal: be ready
for the Aurigaen Belt run.

Insurance money showed up, and Kerryn dug deep into it. All
his father's assets were willed to him, and so he had the
benefit of his father's retirement account. He worked, and
worked, and worked, alone, and barely spoke to anyone short
of the computing systems. And with one month to spare,
Totentanz had been completely restored, repaired and adapted
to her new readiness. It was inspection time.

The inspection of Totentanz was in the middle of the repair
cycle for the ships damaged at Rana 7. The big ones were
being repaired fast, but it took a lot of work. The smaller
ones had to wait. And so it was that when Kerryn got his
inspection, he was the first of the smaller ones to be
ready. Needless to say, the inspection passed.

And yet, in the distant emptiness of space Starfleet
continued silent, and as he worked on Totentanz Kerryn gave
up hope for the Academy. Each bolt, each conduit, each
system was a part of his investiture in the Guild, and a
step away from the marvel of the Academy. Occasionally he
would have a moment of awareness, a pang of loss and
disgust, and then it would abate. No time for moping now.

The Guild Director stopped over when Kerryn was ready to
leave. Besides wishing him congratulations and best of luck,
he took a more personal note and they went to a bar. The
Director noted how old Kerryn looked, realizing that his
youngest Adjudicator was still sixteen, but it was sixteen
going on sixty.

"Kerryn, no one can fault you work. Your father would have
been so incredibly proud." He smiled at Kerryn's slight
stiffening. "I know it hurts, but he is somewhere bursting
with pride." He leaned forward. "When you shot the ass of
that Cardassian, do you know what you really did?"

Taken aback, Kerryn shook his head. "Not really. I got a
direct hit."

The Director nodded. "Yes, and changed the outcome of that
battle. Starfleet itself was losing. We were losing. But you
placed that one shot, and it destroyed the flagship."

"Destroyed?" Kerryn was aghast. "I knew I shot their engines
apart. But what about the rest?"

"Chain reaction. And then with no power, Starfleet pummeled
them. You, my boy, saved that battle." He shook his head
again. "Hooking up that ridiculous Turian to your ship, and
then using an antique weapon to achieve such results! Well
done. Appalling circumstances, and I miss Doryn dearly. But
he would be so incredibly proud right now."

"Yes, he would."

"So where are you off to now?"

Kerryn sighed. "Aurigaen Belt. It's as good a place as any
for a shakedown cruise."

"Alone?"

Kerryn nodded.

"That isn't a good idea."

"Probably not, but it is what I am going to do."

The Director wasn't surprised. "The Guild has invested a lot
in you, Ship Master. I'll revoke your command if you are out
on a death wish or try to pull something stupid."

"Understood, sir, but I am not out for either of those. I
just want to be alone, and I've got to clear some debt."
Kerryn hadn't thought of a death wish. It would have
appalled his father. No, he realized, he had much to do to
uphold himself in the eyes of his father's ghost. And it
still haunted him through Totentanz.

Satisfied, the Director finished his drink. "One more thing.
The Belt run is four months?"

"Yes. It's pretty reliable that way."

"Just remember that you are still an Adjudicator, and I will
be calling on you heavily for that when you get back."

Kerryn nodded, the director wished him luck, and departed.

Totentanz, incidentally was a name that referred to a Death
Dance in old German. And that four-month trip in the
Aurigaen Belt literally was that, as the freighter leapt
from stop to stop in the ornate and well-defined
trajectories it had been following for decades. Doryn's
ghost followed everywhere, and Kerryn received condolences
(but no favors) at each stop. They were relieved to see
Kerryn follow in his father's footsteps.

The hardest stop had been Dulzian IV. The Palos Verde and
Tanya were not there, but the station echoed with his moans
of bliss and victory from the prior visit. Kerryn realized
at that point that he was letting himself be haunted by the
whole experience. Maybe it was because he was greeted here
with enthusiasm on his own right, and it was the first stop
not to immediately offer condolences on Doryn's death. But
he began to shake off some of the grief.

Totentanz was now more than his ship. It was his adaptation.
It wasn't his father's ship that he won in a bet, however
ridiculous that might seem. It was his, with his bridge, his
repairs, his new systems. And his cloaking device. She went
faster than before, was more efficient than before, and had
a bigger bridge than the old Nav deck had been. Slowly the
ghost of Doryn let him be, and more of the fond memories
dominated his mind when his father's image flashed through
his mind. His last pain was that he wished Starfleet had
responded to him while he was alive.

Kerryn turned seventeen in silence. He was at Mobius II for
the event, and bought himself a bourbon at the flight bar.
More route news, more tension with the Cardassians. Rana 7
was still disabled, which made Kerryn snort in disgust. It
doesn't take that long to rebuild such an important station.
Their engineers must be nuts.

His one outlet were the vids. Each stop has at least a dozen
pornographic vid dealers, and Kerryn began collecting some.
He would watch them while in flight, taking his time for a
good long wank. Watching the vids helped him cum, but they
also kept the memories of Imzadi at bay. Seventeen is a
horny age, and Kerryn was no different there. He was
grateful, actually because sometimes when he was so
incredibly horny and would even fuck a Cardassian, there was
no one but his hand and the vids. At least he stayed out of
trouble that way.

When he got back to Delvin Six, it was hard not to label
Kerryn a boonie. He was quiet but jumpy, and his hair made
him truly look wild. His voice was gruff from disuse. The
Guild immediately put him on assignment to clear the backlog
of technical investigations. With the frightening
thoroughness that was now an indelible part of him, Kerryn
would visit the site of the technical issue, which was
usually on a ship, sending the support staff in wild frenzy
to answer his questions. He was thorough, he was fair, but
he always found a voluminous list of problems that needed
correcting.

Two months more of freight, and back to Delvin Six. He began
docking less at Delvin Six North, and started planning newer
routes. Starbase 277 was small, but on the fringe of the
Federation and still offered freight services. It seemed
that every time he ended up at the Guild station, he got
more work from the Guild. By going to 277, he could slip out
of that role.

The Flight School had actually made him realize that he
needed to get out of civilization. The Station Commander had
contacted him about visiting the Flight School to talk to
the current class of students, and was surprised when Kerryn
politely declined. One more link severed, one more step
towards his peace.

It had caused some personal concern on the Director.
Seventeen, and alone for months at a time. Yet every time he
had talked with Kerryn, the young man was quick, efficient
and moderate. Reticent, more so than ever. The Director had
actually contacted the Tech Commander at the Flight School
for advice, and began to understand more. The loss of his
lover, the tainting of his best friend, his father, and then
all their deaths while he survived - it was a lot to deal
with. Kerryn needed something to inspire him.

That opportunity showed up quicker than ever. Starfleet,
after being decimated by the Borg had lost a number of ships
and as a result had designed some new ones. All in a hurry.
Most were operational, but the new Defiant class was having
problems. Unable to resolve them due to resource time on
their own, they had assembled a team of experts to help, and
the Guild was contributing some veteran members. The
Director saw an opportunity, and remembering the work with
the Turian Zephyr, he named Kerryn to the list.

Fortunately, Kerryn was at Starbase 277 after just unloading
cargo when the flash priority message arrived. He read it in
disbelief. It was from the Guild Shipworks Office, and it
ordered Lieutenant Kerryn to Starbase 290 immediately to
support an engineering review. Oh, and he would have a
passenger who was also on the team.

Kerryn sighed. He had just begun to feel normal again. He
would need a new Guild uniform. And so he started the
preparations. He cleaned a cabin, not that it was dirty but
hey, that's what you did. The rest of Totentanz was in tip-
top shape, except for the bridge lighting. It would go out
for no reason periodically. Kerryn had made a mission of
tracing the problem but he always got sidetracked as he got
close to it.

Dressing in a ship suit, he met a pleasant good-looking man
named Zink Battan. Zink had been pulled off of another ship
to join this team. He was older, with those unremarkable
features that describe general good looks. He grinned at
Kerryn.

"Lieutenant Zink Battan. Permission to come aboard?"

Kerryn smiled, and shook his hand. "Welcome aboard
Totentanz. I'm Kerryn."

"Call me Zink." He squinted. "You're a lot younger than I
expected." Apparently Zink spoke his mind.

"Seventeen, to be correct." They entered the ship, and he
showed Zink to his cabin. "This is your cabin. We can make
Warp Five at best, so it'll be six hours or so. Feel free to
wander around. I'm without cargo just now."

Zink looked around the cabin in appreciation. Spartan, yes,
but functional and nice sized. "Thanks. Where's the rest of
your crew?"

Kerryn laughed. "No crew. Just me." He described the ship's
layout, and then waved. "I've got to get us under way. The
bridge is all the way forward and up the stairs."

"Thanks again." And as he watched Kerryn depart, he
moistened his lips. Kerryn was definitely a hot guy. A
boonie for sure, but frustrated boonies made the most
exciting sex partners.

Kerryn reached the bridge, departed and made best speed to
Starbase 290. It was close, but it was a lot bigger. Humph.
And more expensive. He would at least get to expense the
docking fee to the Guild.
Zink joined him up there shortly, and laughed.

"Starfleet, eh?"

Kerryn nodded. "After Rana 7, it was what I could afford and
what was available. It actually works out really well."

"They aren't big on interoperability."

"Nope. I had to replace all the systems. They were antiques
anyway. But the structure and the hull are well worth it."

"It's nicely done. Who did the work?"

"I did. Took almost three weeks in a space suit, but it
isn't going to come off."

Zink whistled. "So, you are a flier and a tech?"

"And a boonie. But my Guild title is Ship Master."

Zink nodded. "Ah. Got it. I'm only a Master Technician. I
can see why you are on this team, though."

Kerryn brightened considerably. "I know nothing. What is
this about?"

Zink took one of the few seats. "Starfleet built a new class
of ship. Defiant. It's got problems and they want help
fixing it because all their shipyards are busy. It's also
supposed to be a model for others to build off of. They got
hit really bad by the Borg."

Kerryn shuddered. "The Borg give me nightmares." His
thoughts turned back to the Defiant class. "What's the big
problem they have?"

"Poor power use. It's nonfunctional. It fused half its
systems on the first mission."

They chatted, and Kerryn found out that Zink was from the
Palos Verde. "I met a friend on Palos Verde some months ago.
Tanya Johnson?"

Zink nodded. "Oh yes, we know Tanya. She is good, and she's
a legend among us. We were at Dulzian IV with an
undiagnosable problem. She goes to the bar, finds a genius
who comes back with her, they fix it and then have the
hottest make-out session most of us have ever seen.
Apparently he got a clue, and then they went off together.
She won't tell anyone how she did it. She had to run the guy
off the ship though, `cause the captain saw green and wanted
to go." He laughed. "I guess we'll never know how she pulled
it off."

Kerryn was bright red. His sex life was never before general
knowledge. Before he could stop himself, he said, "It was
just luck. We were in the bar at the right time."

Zink stared. "Holy shit, it was YOU! Man, you are legend on
Palos Verde! Both for fixing the grid, and for whatever you
did to Tanya. She was purring like a kitten for weeks." He
leaned closer. "So what really happened?"

Kerryn shrugged. "I wasn't looking for anything." That
wasn't quite true. "But I was in the bar, she came over and
ordered something strong. So I asked what was going on, and
she told me." Kerryn grinned. "I speak Romulan, and so we
went back to Palos Verde. We fixed the problem, but-" and he
stopped.

"But what? C'mon, tell me! You must have been hot for her."

"Not until she grabbed me in the Jeffries tube."

Zink laughed. "She slipped and grabbed you? Where?"

"Where do you think?"

"Nice. Then what?"

"Well, you saw the rest."

"Ha." Zink continued to grin. "The rumors are a lot better.
The truth could use some embellishment."

Kerryn liked this guy. He was easy, he was relaxed. "Rumors
are rumors." He shrugged. "But I'm glad to hear that she is
doing OK." He moved back to the topic. "Defiant, hmmm. What
are we doing there anyway?"

Zink rolled his eyes. "I almost forgot. Give me your
implant." Kerryn held out his arm, and Zink applied what was
known as an encrypted one-time use uploader.
"Congratulations, you are now a Delegate of Delvin Six and
the Freighter Guild. That gives you full Ambassadorial
status."

"Cool. So what are we really doing?"

And Zink explained that they were there to review the
Defiant class. With a sufficient vote, the Guild and others
would contribute experience and cooperation in exchange for
several of the vessels, crewed by Starfleet but at non-
Starfleet discretion. "The Guild is relying on us to make
sure that they get something useful."

Kerryn nodded. "OK."

Zink looked at him carefully. "Kerryn, I'm a blunt outspoken
guy, and a good tech. The Director is concerned that you may
not be vocal enough. What do you think?"

The young Ship Master considered this. "He's probably right,
at least at the beginning. I've been out alone for a long
time."

"If there is anything you need to say, and you can't do it,
tell me. That's part of my job. The Guild has incredible
confidence in you."

Kerryn nodded. "OK, call it a backup plan."

They continued, and then Zink yawned widely. "I'm going to
bed for the next four hours. Wake me an hour before
docking?"

"Will do." And Zink went to his cabin and closed the door.

Six hours later found them docked and debriefed on the
procedures. Zink had donned his formal Guild uniform, but
Kerryn stayed in the ship suit. He fully hoped to get a nuts-
and-bolts view of Defiant, and they entered the auditorium
with eagerness.

That was shattered quickly. The first hour was spent
discussing rhetoric. The second hour was all about posturing
by Starfleet. They broke for lunch, and then four more hours
on concept of operations. Kerryn took patchy but detailed
notes. Zink was bored out of his mind.

The chairperson, Ambassador Lankov from the Federation, make
some remarks. "Gentlemen, ladies, it has been a long day.
Let us close the day with a vote: Pass for continuance, or
Fail." General murmurs followed after that, and a lot of
head shaking. Kerryn was surprised. Was this just a
political farce? He knew the rules for voting, and already
had his choice.

The vote was cast, and as the votes were counted the tension
grew. One by one the votes were tallied, and with only
several to go the majority was in question. Finally, with
the last vote counted, pale and disturbed Ambassador Lankov
spoke up.

"The results are seventeen Pass, seventeen Fail, and one
Undecided."

The uproar flooded the room, and Zink turned to Kerryn as
Kerryn himself turned bright red. "Undecided?? That was YOU?
Jeez man, welcome to the spotlight! Shit!"

The room was quieted, and the Ambassador spoke again. "Would
the undecided vote like to step forward and share with us
his rationale?"

Zink turned to Kerryn. "Well?"

Kerryn nodded nervously, and stood. "May I approach the
podium?"

"By all means."

As he walked, he saw the scheming stares of what appeared to
be politicians around him. Damn them. This is a design
review, not an election! Fury began to rise in him. Cold
fury. Millions died because of the Borg, and this mishap of
a vessel was being negotiated as a solution?

Zink watched him gather momentum, and grinned. He should
have sold tickets.

Kerryn approached the podium, and the Ambassador stepped
aside. He began to speak. "First, I am Ship Master Kerryn, a
Delegate of the Freighter Guild. I have level twelve
qualifications in all areas of ship operations and
engineering. I have elected to vote Undecided because this
meeting is a Technical Design Review called by Starfleet,
and I have yet to see one shred of technical discussion." He
took a deep breath. "My Guild has entrusted me with
technical responsibility of seeing its objectives met. Being
as how I joined this review seven hours ago, at this time I
have no basis by which to cast the vote entrusted to me."

There was a dead silence, and the Ambassador nodded,
shredding Kerryn with his eyes. So Kerryn continued,
"Ambassador, please, what is the procedure for obtaining
technical design information on the Defiant class, and for
scheduling a flight test?"

PANDEMONIUM! Cries of astonishment from Starfleet, and
disbelief from many of the members present, although a
faction in the back stood and began clapping loudly. The
Ambassador assumed the podium and called them back to order,
at which point Kerryn shrugged his shoulders and grinned. "I
didn't think that was such an unreasonable request."

Lankov realized that there might be something productive
finally out of this after all, but it wasn't going to be the
rubber stamp he had hoped for. "We can discuss that after
the meeting."

Kerryn shook his head. He knew a blow-off when he saw it,
and a quick scan of Lankov proved him right. "I'm sorry, but
that would be biased and unacceptable. I should have access
only to the same information that everyone else is entitled
to, although they may decline it at will."

Lankov's eyes narrowed, and Kerryn saw a necessary
confrontation coming. So he beckoned to Lankov, and they
stepped back from the podium.

Lankov made the first comment. "You're in over your head,
boy."

Kerryn smiled. "Perhaps. This is for your knowledge only. I
have nothing to lose here, except the welfare of my Guild if
deception takes place. I am incorruptible. I also am half
Betazoid, so nothing, and I mean nothing, gets past me,
Ambassador."

Lankov went completely pale. "Understood. But you are
playing with fire, boy."

"My proper title is Ship Master, Ambassador. I have not yet
shown you any discourtesy." He sighed melodramatically.
"Being so young-looking, I'm so misunderstood." Play up the
fear. "I've probably killed more people this year than
you've had dinner with." And he stepped back, next to the
podium.

Shaken, the Ambassador knew he was trapped. But they at
least would get a technical solution on Defiant now, that he
was sure of. Guess this would be an honest one, as this kid?
Killer? Tech? Delegate, he realized, more than anything.
This Delegate would see to it that it went that way.

"Ladies and gentlemen, technical details on Defiant are
available by request through my office. We don't have many
data pads, so please bring your own for upload. We also have
a holographic design center put together. Our next meeting
is in thirty six hours. Meeting adjourned!" And he moved
quickly out of the theater before anyone could further trap
him.

Zink was staring and grinning at him, and as Kerryn finally
realized what he had done he began to shake. What the fuck
was this? Thrown to the lions, with an impossible task? If
he weren't so pissed at Starfleet in general, would he be
doing this? He looked at Zink, and said, "Let's go to the FQ
bar."

They went, and while Kerryn could feel many of the other
delegates rushing behind him, he knew his way around and
slipped up the back stairs. Many of them wouldn't recognize
a staircase if it hit them. A wave of his implant, and they
were in the Guild section of the station, and then the bar.
Sitting, without any greeting he called the bartender and
ordered three bourbons.

Zink raced to keep up with him, and when he saw the three
glasses he knew Kerryn was rattled. God, it had been
something to see. Kerryn held the trump card, and a dozen
nations now hung on his every word. The Director was going
to shit.

Five minutes, and Zink started talking. "I've never seen
such a farce all day today. I don't know why the Director
sent us here if it was going to be like that. Maybe to do
just what you did, and shake things up a bit. But tomorrow
they will all have recovered from the shock." He leaned
forward. "Just so you know, I have to make daily reports to
the Director, about our status. He was desperate to do
something about this, and he feels bad about throwing us
in."

Kerryn finally looked at Zink. "S'OK. Just tell the truth."
He sighed. "Zink, I don't know if I can keep up that pose. I
mean, they're all such big, important people and I'm, well,
me. A boonie on a one-man cargo freighter."

Zink stared, and then laughed. "You need a good lay, my
friend. Maybe I'll have Tanya warp in."

Kerryn stared again, and then laughed as the liquor took
hold. The incongruity struck him, and Zink was bound to find
out anyway. "Zink, don't bother. I'm gay, although I can
claim to show a woman a good time once in a while."

"You're gay?" Zink shuddered. Oh yes, he knew what he would
do. "When we get back, we're going to discuss that." He had
seen one of the other delegates come over, a tall man with
gray hair and blue eyes that twinkled merrily. "Uh oh, here
comes one of the delegates. Guild cleared, though."

The man spied them, and came over to sit next to Kerryn. He
ordered something, and then looked him square in the eyes.
"That was really something, today. We've been clamoring for
details all along, and nothing happens."

"Well, I've got a job to do, and people will die if this
isn't done, and isn't done right."

"A most excellent philosophy."

Kerryn started to like this man. "A way of life, really.
Knowing you can rely on certain things makes survival
easier."

The man nodded. "I have thought so, and every ship I have
designed has echoed that philosophy."

Something clicked in Kerryn, and he reached forward and
downed another bourbon. One to go. He held out his hand.
"Ship Master Kerryn, of the freighter Totentanz. My
associate here is Master Technician Zink Battan, of the
Palos Verde."

The man nodded, and took the hand. "Turian, Director and
Chief Designer of Turian Shipworks."

Kerryn froze. "Turian? THE Turian?"

The man nodded, grinning. "In the flesh."

"Well, indeed this is an honor. I had never expected to meet
you!" Kerryn warmed, suddenly. This was the man who had
designed his beloved Zephyr. "Working your ships has been an
absolute pleasure! Not like that Prevyar crap."

That brought out a chuckle. "Yes, well, someone has to make
ships for the masses."

"They brought you in to review the Defiant as well, then.
Wow."

He nodded. "Really, Kerryn, I'm just a builder, not a
miracle worker."

Kerryn laughed at himself. "Perhaps. But you certainly have
my highest respect for ship design and construction."

Turian's eyes narrowed. "That means you have worked some of
mine. Which ones?"

"Well, at the flight school they still use a number of your
trainer craft. I found one of yours specifically and brought
its aging guts up to standard." Kerryn grinned slyly. "But
the one I am most proud of I have back on Totentanz."

"Are you going to tell me, or do I have to guess?"

"A Zephyr." He paused, and then said, "D series."

Turian's eyes split wide, and his grin followed it. "Really?
I've tracked most of them down, and I do not recall seeing
your name on the list. Which one do you have?"

"Number five."

Turian sat back, his eyes speculative. "Number five was sold
as salvage for parts."

"My father bought it in barely flyable condition from the
Delvin Six Salvage Office. I reworked it to specification,
and have since added a micro-warp drive." He sighed. "I love
that ship."

"A micro-warp drive? That would be something to see. The
hull isn't warp capable."

"Wasn't. I had to add some reinforcements and beef up the
inertial dampers, let alone the power systems."

A very technical exchange took place, and the more it did
the broader Turian's grin grew. Finally, he called a halt.
"Sounds like you reinvented my ship. I don't suppose it's
near by?"

Kerryn laughed. "Walking distance."

"Ship Master, I would love to see the D-5 again, at your
convenience."

Kerryn nodded. "It would be a pleasure. But not today, I
think. I've got to get through the Defiant design still."

Turian nodded. "As do we all, now that the tech data is
unlocked." Standing, he gestured to them. "Care for a stroll
to the Ambassadorial Office?"

Stopping at Totentanz long enough to pick up a data pad,
Kerryn, Zink and Turian made their way to the office, where
an ambassadorial aide uploaded the data onto their pads, and
them curtly dismissed them. It was obvious though that the
Ambassador was not cooperating, as the data was locked and
could not be opened by either of them. They needed a
Starfleet id of some sort.

They split up, Turian back to his office and Kerryn and Zink
back to Totentanz, with the promise of sharing anything they
unlocked if they could do it.

Most of the other officials were using hotel services on the
station, but Zink and Kerryn returned to Totentanz. Zink
really didn't mind, but he had booked a large and
comfortable suite on the station. Kerryn, however
immediately opened one of the cabins and began spreading out
information about Defiant. Again, he set up a war room for
designers, and tried to access the Defiant data from the
Ambassador. No luck. It kept asking for a Starfleet id.

Wait a minute. He ran back to his cabin, fished out his
Starfleet communicator badge, and remembered how he had
identified himself for the Academy exams. Zink had followed
him in, and this time when it asked for his id, he wore the
activated communicator and spoke.

"Lieutenant Kerryn, Flight Officer First Class and Master
Technician, Freighter Guild."

The data pad unlocked the file, and copious information
began streaming out. Zink let out a shout, and they began
displaying data on whatever they could. Much of it was
there. Kerryn stopped long enough to let Turian know that
any valid Starfleet id would work, but Turian had gone to
bed. Zink was going to make his report, and was on his way
to bed when he heard Kerryn began speaking violently in some
other language.

"Dude, what is it?"

Kerryn turned to him. "This fucking ship was designed by a
committee! And one whose members apparently didn't talk to
each other. There's integration evidence all over this ship
that shows total breakdown of configuration."

"That's pretty bad."

"Not so bad. I think we'll find that the systems used are
robust and reliable, but it is the infrastructure that is
shot to hell." Kerryn paced. "They aren't going to like this
at all." He grabbed a pad. "I'm going to draft some
recommendations that you will have to introduce at the next
meeting."

Zink put up his hands. "No way. I'm out of my league. You
are going to have to do it. I have to speak to the Director
and he will be elated that we actually have a voice this
time." As he said it, he could see Kerryn slide back inside,
away from a stand. "Oh no, my friend, you can't escape. Not
now. It's too late for that."

"Zink, I can not go up there alone and shoot apart their
design! Are you fucking nuts?"

"Funny you should mention fucking. You need to top, my
friend. Tonight. You need to get used to asserting yourself.
I know you can do it, because I have seen it. But you have
to be able to choose to do it, not be forced into it." He
moved closer to Kerryn. "You said you were gay."

"It's true."

"Well, so am I. You're going to top me tonight."

Kerryn couldn't believe his ears. "What? You aren't
serious."

"Nope, I am. I can tell. You're going to top me, and what's
more, you are going to have to want to, more than I don't
want you to. Damn it Kerryn, you've got to. I'm going to
resist, but you've got to do it. I've even orders from the
Director for you to that effect." That was a stretch, but
hey!

Zink kept goading Kerryn. Kerryn became more and more
irritated. Zink was provoking him into action, and finally
Kerryn had had it. He was going to top him, and give him the
fuck of his life. But it would be on his terms.

Zink knew he was close. One more would do it. Hit him in the
nuts, he thought.

"Shit, Kerryn, you've got to do better. I'm beginning to
think you and Tanya made up that whole thing."

Stung, Kerryn lost it. "That does it, Zink. You want to be
topped?" He stormed over to Zink, who was now wide-eyed with
surprise as Kerryn pushed him back into the wall. His body,
now taut and sensitive pressed into Zink's. His eyes blazed
and caught fire, and without waiting he caught Zink in a
powerful kiss, the older man suddenly trembling helpless in
the fierce, hot embrace. They were both hard, instantly, and
the desire for sex flooded Kerryn.

Kerryn dragged Zink to his cabin, and closed and locked the
door. "Strip." And Zink slowly started, lingering on things
like cuffs, until Kerryn stepped forward and efficiently
removed his clothes. Kerryn spent no time on his own, and
quickly stepped out of them. And there they were, two naked
men, one older one younger. Zink began to wonder what he had
unlocked.

But Kerryn left him no time to think. Pushing him onto the
bed, he attacked the older man's cock with his mouth.
Roughly. Zink was caught off guard, and a long groan escaped
from him as Kerryn expertly laved his sensitive organ. And
when Kerryn's hand firmly closed on his balls, Zink felt the
rapture of being trapped in pleasure. Any wiggle from him
brought on a squeeze that showed him exactly who was boss.

Kerryn satisfied his need there, and then he pulled off and
climbed up over Zink. Zink was now half sitting against the
headboard, as Kerryn stood on his knees in front of him, his
cock right there in front of him. Zink knew what was
expected, but he wasn't going to give in. No, make him do it
himself.

Kerryn saw the inaction, and that flared through him. So he
came closer, and gently taking Zink's head in his hands he
drew the older man's mouth onto his own cock. Shivers of
sensation raced through him. Zink knew what he was in for,
or so he thought. But Kerryn drew Zink's mouth on and off
his cock, and Zink began to oblige with his tongue. Kerryn,
however began to push deeper into Zink, and slowly when Zink
had taken a deep breath, he pushed himself all the way in,
firmly but gently. God, that felt good! Zink then surprised
him by grabbing his ass and pushing in that extra half inch.
Mmmm.

Kerryn pulled out of his mouth, and Zink had that wanton
look that showed that he was enjoying this. Time to fuck.
"Roll over." And as Zink moved, Kerryn reached for the lube
and coated his cock. This was dominance, not sadism. He
wanted it long, hard and slick.

Zink had a great butt. But he wasn't rolling over. So Kerryn
glared at him, and decided that this would have to go to a
new level. "Roll over, damn it."

"Why should I?" He smirked. Kerryn looked so hot and
bothered right now.

Kerryn then did something he had never done before, nor did
he know that he could do it. Lust and dominance were ruling
him, and he reached with his mind into Zink. Zink gasped in
surprise as he felt the other mind flood his, and before he
could stop himself Kerryn had taken command of his body and
rolled him over, his butt exposed, ready and waiting.
Satisfied, Kerryn approached from behind, placed his cock at
Zink's entrance and began the long stroke inward. Gently. He
wasn't there to hurt him, but he was there to top him.

Zink felt the grip on his mind and body, and struggled, but
he knew he had achieved success as Kerryn stroked in and
out. He could feel the other mind in its vice-like grip on
him, and the pleasure it was giving was beyond anything he
had had. He was enraptured too much to care about being
violated, and with one long stroke he reached orgasm and
spilled his seed all over Kerryn's bed. Oh god, that was
good!

Kerryn however did not let up. He continued to build his own
sensations, and managed to convey to Zink that he could
struggle all he wanted but Kerryn was not letting go until
he was done. Zink took the chance then, amazed, to fight and
writhe in the mental grip as his body was pummeled, but it
was no use. He was a captive to the young guy topping him.
And topping him well! With amazement, Zink felt another
orgasm rip through him as Kerryn stabbed at his pleasure
spot, and with a gasp Kerryn himself came long and hard
inside Zink.

After several seconds and the spasming had stopped, Kerryn
released Zink's mind and rolled to the side of the bed. He
was exhilarated, he was victorious, and he was exhausted.
Zink had played him like a fiddle, and yet Zink probably got
more than he had bargained for.

"Well now, that was probably one for the record books." Zink
winced slightly. His butt had been well reamed, but he was
no stranger to that. "I think you'll do fine. But, what the
hell were you doing inside my head?"

Kerryn looked over at the really hot figure of Zink. "It's
not widely known, but I'm half Betazoid. I can give my
partner a superior experience, among other things."

"Did you do that for Tanya?"

Kerryn shook his head. "No, there wasn't time."

Zink looked at him. "You went too far."

"Fuck you, Zink. You asked for it."

And then he knew that he had done it. Zink cracked a smile,
and said, "You're right. Well done. That was awesome." He
groaned and started to dress. "Until this is over, every
night you are going to do just that and more to me. I have
little to hide, so top my mind too." Kerryn stared at him,
amazed. "I'll love it, of course, but I will resist it.
You've got to keep that aggressive edge."

Kerryn stared at him, and then laughed. "You're a whore,
Zink."

Rather huffily, he shook his head. "Not really. You aren't
paying me." Then he yawned widely. "I'm going to bed now.
You?"

"Nope. Shower, though and then back into Defiant."

They split up, and while Zink went back to the station,
Kerryn enjoyed a long shower. During that time, Zink called
into the Director. The Director was most curious to hear
from Zink this time.

"Well, Battan, what's going on?"

Zink related the day, and the Director had to sit down.
"He's really amazing. He won't take an aggressive lead
unless there is no other way. He is disgusted with the
design on Defiant, and that is the best thing in the world
for him because he will fix it, and will not swerve from
fixing it."

The Director nodded. "There's more, I can tell."

"Well, somehow he got a Starfleet id and communicator. The
data we got was locked, and he knew enough somehow about how
the ids work, so the next thing I know he's got a
communicator and unlocked the thing. He used an earlier
title to identify himself, though, so it must be an old id."

"Well, now, that is interesting. Anything else?"

"He's gay by preference. And he's half Betazoid, with the
mental skills to prove it." Zink winked at the director, who
got the point immediately. "He's also got a great friend and
ally now in Turian."

"That is most excellent news. I gave you a sealed container
before you left. Open it. Inside are the Director's Proxy
and an updater. Give it to him."

"Are you serious?"

"Yes. I know him a bit, and he will not abuse the
privilege."

Zink gulped. Kerryn would have total control of the Guild.
"Yes, sir."

"Remember, though, he is not political. Anytime he gets
close to something we want to protect, invoke the need for
an Ultraviolet Clearance. I've just cleared him and you for
that."

Shit, shit, shit! "Yes, sir." And they closed the link.

Kerryn worked through the details. He had no idea what time
it was, but on Totentanz it was 0400 hours when he contacted
Defiant. He wanted a flight test.

"USS Defiant, this is the Freighter Guild vessel Totentanz."

His small screen cleared to show an oldish man. "Totentanz,
this is Captain Delario. How may we be of service?"

"Sir, I am one of the technical reviewers on the Design
Review Team. I was hoping for some flight test time."

The captain grinned. "We were forewarned that you might ask
for that. What did you have in mind?"

"Some stressing maneuvers and actions that characterize
power consumption. I would also like to find an asteroid and
shoot the bloody hell out of it with phasers."

The captain nodded. "Ambassador Lankov is asleep just now."
Kerryn's heart fell. "But I and my night engineers would be
pleased to run some exercises for you."

YES!! "Captain, I humbly take you up on your offer."

"Beam over in ten minutes?"

"Yes, at the standard point."

"Very good." The captain closed then channel, and grinned.
"Alert the crew. Full readiness."

Two hours later they were done, and Captain Delario wondered
whether this had been a good idea. First, Kerryn had them do
some long accelerations and stops. Then some tight turns. He
then asked to take the helm, and put the ship through
tortuous maneuvers in what must have been a dozen
dimensions. The power and propulsion systems had whined in
response, and half the crew was nauseous. Then, at quarter
power across the board they had shot full phasers at an
uninhabited asteroid, blowing it to bits but browning out
the ship. Delario realized that Kerryn knew the faults, and
was testing how bad the reality was. All in this kid. He
collected all kinds of statistics on a data pad, and was
perfectly polite about anything that could be sensitive.

Delario himself had escorted him back to the transporter. "I
sincerely hope you got what you were looking for, Ship
Master. That was one hell of a ride."

Kerryn grinned. "Captain, it was a pleasure. I am going to
make a number of recommendations on how to fix this ship."
The captain bristled at that one. "The individual subsystems
are all fine, but the infrastructure is hell. I may have to
get very nasty about Starfleet design, but you and your crew
have been the soul of courtesy and accommodation. We are
going to fix this ship."

Delario knew sincerity when he saw it. "I believe you will.
Thank you." He turned to the chief. "Energize." And when
Kerryn was gone, Delario went right to Sickbay for something
to relieve the queasiness.

Kerryn flew back to Totentanz, where he found Zink and
Turian patiently waiting for him. Ooops.

"Where have you been?"

"Flight test on Defiant."

They laughed, and then saw him plug in the data pad. Zink's
eyes went wide, and he exclaimed, "You're serious, right?
SHIT! Don't you ever fucking sleep?"

Kerryn turned to look at Zink coyly. "I could start right
here on you in front of Turian. Do you want that?"

Oooh, he was feeling his horns today, thought Zink. "That
will not be necessary, thank you. What did you find?" And
they went through it all. After nearly twenty hours, Kerryn
had formalized his list of recommendations, and had a long
discussion with Turian about the warp nacelles. They were
too weak to be on supports, and needed to be integral with
the ship. Kerryn had no clue how to do that, but Turian took
over and redesigned the outer hull. What came out was what
would eventually be the USS Defiant that would go to Deep
Space Nine under Benjamin Sisko.

Zink and Turian had disappeared at some point. He knew they
each had been yawning and maybe they went to take a nap.
That was fine; he had what he needed. It just had to be
turned into a report and with pretty language.

A chime went off, and a transmission came in from Ambassador
Lankov. "Ship Master, this is Ambassador Lankov. I
understand you conducted some flight tests yesterday."

Was it yesterday already? "No rest for the busy, Ambassador.
Yes, Captain Delario was most obliging, although I am afraid
I nauseated most of the crew."

"You will share your findings with us today?"

Today? He checked his watch, and sure enough it was 0620.
Two and a half hours to go. Kerryn nodded. "Ambassador, I
believe I will need most of the day to discuss Defiant. This
is going to be an honest, dirty little review."

The ambassador nodded. He had thought as much. This kid got
things done. "I would like to conference in the key
designers at Starfleet Command and Utopia Planitia over
subspace." See if he would be scared off.

Kerryn nodded. "A most excellent idea. The less I have to
repeat myself, the better. I'm losing money on this
assignment."

The ambassador's eyebrows raised. "Losing money?"

"I'm a freighter, ambassador. No cargo means no money."

"I see." But he didn't. "We will see you in two hours.
Lankov out."

Turian and Zink had arrived with coffee, and now was
hovering behind him. "I've got something for you." He
slapped on a large, ornate Guild symbol and with a small
device updated his implant. "Congratulations, you are now
the Director's Proxy."

"WHAT?" He looked at the symbol. "Oh shit, Zink! Me?"

"Yes you, you asshole." Zink was grinning. "I've never
delivered one before, but it is real. He is real proud of
you." Zink punched him in the arm. "You don't ever sleep, do
you? You need a shower bad, and a new uniform. You should
wear the formal one."

Kerryn looked at Turian, who had been watching, amused.
"Would you excuse us for a moment?"

Turian knew that look. He had thought Kerryn was gay, but
with the interactions now he knew what Zink's role was. "We
don't have all day, you know." And he exited the conference
room.

Kerryn walked over to Zink, pushed him again up against the
wall and kissed him thoroughly. All he needed was the
momentum from the kiss, and Zink returned it. When it broke,
Zink was panting and grinning, and Kerryn was satisfied.

"Feel better?"

"In some ways."

On the way out, Kerryn took Turian up to see the little
Zephyr D. Turian's eyes were shining as he went over the
craft, touching his signature carefully. "She's beautiful,
Kerryn."

"Thanks. I love that ship more than anything."

"Or anyone?"

Kerryn chilled, and looked at Turian distantly. "I've had
all my loves ripped away from me, either by elitism or by
the Cardassians."

"You survived Rana 7 then."

"My father, two very close but estranged friends and a host
of other friends of mine were killed at Rana 7. But yes, I
survived."

Zink chimed in. "He's the one who wiped out the flagship."

Kerryn glared at Zink, but Turian stared at Kerryn. "Really?
I would like to hear of that sometime."

"Well, suffice to say that that little Zephyr, in diagnostic
mode aimed an antique but powerful weapon into the
Cardassian's engines and started an unknown-to-me chain
reaction that let Starfleet pummel the shit out of them."

They had arrived at the conference room early, and Turian
shook Kerryn's hand. "You have my total support. Defend the
Guild. And this is not the first time I have shook hands
with the Director's Proxy."

Kerryn blushed. "Thanks. It was a pleasure meeting you."
Kerryn already had his exit plan, although Zink probably
didn't know about it yet. He had had enough of this
activity. All it made him want to do was crawl back in to
Totentanz and escape.

They entered, and several tech people were there
coordinating displays. Kerryn worked with them to interface
in the data pad. He had made sure that both Zink and Turian
had an unlocked copy of the data and all the
recommendations. The link with Starfleet was established,
and the others began filtering in.

Kerryn was in full dress uniform, every medal, insignia and
emblem visible, along with the proxy. But it was the sunken
fire in his eyes and the obvious exhaustion that actually
added to his credibility. This guy had invested a lot of
himself, and that had caused a round of muttering.
Ambassador Lankov started the discussion promptly.

"Ship Master, would you care to take the floor?"

"By all means, Ambassador." He went over to the podium with
his coffee, and there was a quiet tension in the air. "Here
is my principal assessment. If you remember nothing else,
remember this: Defiant's infrastructure is shot to hell."
Furor, then quiet. "This ship was designed by a committee.
Each of the subsystems works well and is appropriate, but
power is five times too low. I don't know what the fuck
Starfleet was thinking, but the lead engineer should be
aimed at a supernova."

Shouting and gesturing! Most of it was from the Starfleet
link. Too tired to fight, Kerryn waited five minutes for it
to die down, and when it didn't he gave up and spoke right
into the microphone, deafening the crowds on both sides.
"WILL YOU SHUT UP!!!"

Silence.

"Thank you. We flew some flight tests yesterday morning -"
and more shouting erupted. This was almost comical. He
waited for it to die down again, and said, "If there are any
more eruptions like that one, I will call security and we
can do this from prison cells." He addressed the monitors.
"Starfleet, you are guests here. Please behave like guests."
Damn it, he was the Guild Director right now, and that
deserves some respect.

Zink was filled with fierce joy and pride. Kerryn was going
to nail this!

"These are the power consumption profiles from those flight
tests. My eternal thanks to Captain Delario for obliging me
on short notice." The room darkened, and data appeared
strategically. "As you can see, if you tax any one of the
four tactical assets more than 25% at a time, the power
browns out." More data. He described it all in dead silence.

Now for the interesting part. "Turian and I have developed a
number of design changes to remedy the disaster known as the
Defiant class." Muttering. "I did the systems and power,
Turian did the mechanics and hull." He opened the data pad.

"Please provide a Starfleet Identification."

"Lieutenant Kerryn, Flight Officer First Class and Master
Technician, Freighter's Guild." And the world of the Defiant
was unlocked for all to see. Kerryn made an aside comment,
"I'm afraid my only Starfleet id was rather outdated, but I
was very surprised to have needed one, Ambassador." He
looked pointedly at Lankov.

The next three hours went through all the modifications and
why. No one objected, and Starfleet stood fascinated as the
answer to their debacle was revealed to them. At the end of
the session, Kerryn closed the data pad and the room
returned to normal.

"Ladies and gentlemen, before we break for lunch, I would
like the Ambassador to call a vote." Cries and applause
filled the room. "The vote however, is to proceed with
Defiant with all modifications described in these documents
you have just seen, or improvements thereon. Moreover, the
Guild appoints Director Turian of Turian Shipworks as
overseer and the stakeholder to evaluate the acceptance
tests should the vote pass." Kerryn refused to look at
Turian. "For the Guild to support this effort, the vote must
pass and Starfleet must agree to abide by the decision."
Kerryn lifted up the emblem, and the Director's Proxy was
visible to all. "As you can see, I have the authority to do
so. What say you, Ambassador?"

The ambassador stood, a smile on his face. He turned to the
screen. "Starfleet, what is your position?"

They stood. They cheered, they clapped and the link rang
with applause. When it died down, each side gave the
Ambassador approval to go forward. Kerryn stepped down, the
vote was taken, and it was obvious that the plan had passed
to go forward. The room and the links cheered again, and
then everyone broke for lunch.

Kerryn sat in a chair. This would count as a success for the
Guild. "Zink, get over here." Everyone was congratulating
themselves on a successful outcome. Politics. It made him
sick.

"Yes, Director?"

He took off the badge. "No more. I've had it." He put his
head in his hands, and Zink was at a total loss. The room
was empty now. The links were shut down. It was just the two
of them. Zink could see that Kerryn was shaking. He had to
pull him out of this.

"Did you see Turian's face? He was alternating from
happiness to chagrin!"

"It will put his shipworks back on the map, that's for
sure." He handed the data pad to Zink. "It's all there. More
than I gave you before. Design notes, rationale, formulae I
used, and all the raw test data. A classified file too, that
outlines the basic requirements for an interface to a
cloaking device. Password is `debacle.'"

Zink stared. "Are you going to stop giving me heart-attacks
soon?"

Very soon, thought Kerryn. He nodded. "Go eat. I can't. I
just want to sit here for a while, alone."

"You're going to bolt, aren't you?"

Kerryn looked up thoughtfully. "Do you want the honest
answer, or the one I need to give you?"

Zink sighed. "This wasn't supposed to happen. It's great
that it did, but this was supposed to be a step in getting
you involved in the Guild more. Instead you kill yourself,
pull off a miracle and then are going to crawl back under a
rock."

"Asteroid, not rock."

Zink went over and hugged Kerryn, who stiffened and then
melted into it. Zink was from Palos Verde; he knew about
cargo. They didn't kiss, just a close, long hug. But when
they separated, Kerryn's eyes were misty.

"I'm gonna miss you, Zink."

"I'm sure we'll see each other." He grinned. "Maybe sooner
than you think when they find that you have left. Someone
will be sent to retrieve you."

Kerryn grinned. "Hey, there's a reason I know so much about
cloaking devices." And he winked at Zink one more time in
that upper-hand way.

"Shit." They shook hands. "Be well, Kerryn."

"You too. Say hi to Tanya for me, and if you want, tell her
I got further with you."

"HA! See if I don't." And they parted, Zink to lunch, and
Kerryn back to Totentanz where he immediately undocked and
set Warp Five for Mobius II, the first stop in the Aurigaen
Belt. He might be a week early, but somehow the Belt was his
refuge from chaos.

Of course, Starfleet had good officers and bad officers.
Captain Delario was a good one, and he knew Totentanz from
the transport coordinates. Seeing the vessel depart, he had
an instinctive reaction.

Comms rang out on Totentanz. "Freighter Totentanz, this is
the USS Defiant."

Kerryn sighed. "Defiant, this is Totentanz, Ship Master
Kerryn speaking."

"Captain Delario here. That was some design review."

"Yes, it was. Your point, captain? I'm late to pick up
cargo."

Delario laughed. "You don't think they are going to let you
go now? I'd get ready for at least a two month stay."

Kerryn shook his head. "Not possible. I've done more than my
job. All the notes are quite clear."

Delario looked away, and then back with a pained expression.
"I've now orders to make sure you stay at Starbase."

Kerryn nodded. "I know. Therefore, don't feel any guilt
trying and failing to pursue me. But ask Master Technician
Zink Battan about a classified file he has. Totentanz out."

Tactical showed the Defiant moving after him. Kerryn aimed
Totentanz at Earth, and with Defiant behind he sighed, and
said, "Know when to walk away, know when to run." And he
engaged the cloak, waited thirty seconds, and then put
Totentanz through some torturous corkscrew maneuvers before
settling at Warp 3.2, aimed at Mobius II.

On board Defiant, the crew stood stunned as the docile
freighter shimmered into nothingness ahead of them. They
lost him on all scanners, too. Delario grinned to himself,
and turned to his Communications officer. "Signal that we
have lost him and are unable to hold him." Classified file,
indeed.

Kerryn stood in front of a mirror some hours later, looking
at himself. Seventeen. Tricked or forced into topping.
Redesigning Starfleet's latest, with the head of the most
renowned ship builder in the Guild. Director's Proxy. All
that, and a one-man cargo mover in remote and wild space.
Who am I, Kerryn thought. I am a good engineer. I am a good
pilot. I am responsible. When given a task, I do it right. I
am gay, but can perform straight too. I am a boonie. Yes,
that is it. I am a good, thorough, dedicated boonie. And
setting the ship on autopilot, he got his first four hours
of sleep in the past fifty eight.

Four months of wild space, darting among the different
colonies. This time, however it was not the dance of death,
but the dance of life. Kerryn had been revitalized. Familiar
friends, familiar stops, and he now enjoyed that particular
style of music they had out on the Belt. Earth-style jazz
was always popular, but out on the Belt they had a slight
variant that gave it almost a Renaissance style. It was
music one could dance to, but one would have to dance very
slow and measured for it. Excellent for listening, and
Kerryn found it went very well with bourbon.

It was at Erzahler VI that they caught up with him. A Guild
ship, with Zink and Turian onboard, had been sent after long
searches in the Belt. He had been unlucky that way, as his
route was always the same and after Posaune it was always
Erzahler VI. Apparently he had been tracked to Posaune, and
then they guessed at Erzahler. And so, with cargo of
electronics and systems, Kerryn arrived, unloaded, and then
docked. Heading for the FQ bar, his skin began to prickle as
he recognized the back of Zink's head. Terrific, he thought
wryly. But it did amuse him that he knew the back of that
head so well from his topping experience more than anything
else.

They might not recognize him. He was wearing merchant
clothing, hooded as usual. He really wanted to hear the band
tonight. So he slid into a table at the back, and asked for
his bourbons. Three. They were served, and he leaned back to
listen.

The bourbon gave him away. Zink had asked the server to
point out anyone ordering bourbon, and of course he pointed
at a cloaked and hooded figure at a table in the corner.
Zink stared at him, and the burning eyes under the hood
stared back, and then with surrender the arm came up and
waved him over as Kerryn pulled back his hood and revealed
himself.

"Zink, Turian, please have a seat. Fancy meeting you here."

Zink laughed. "Have you any idea how hard you are to track
down?"

"Some. The Belt is not for the simple."

Turian smiled. "Your little demonstration of the cloaking
device there gave Starfleet apoplexy."

"Yes, well, there is that." Kerryn leaned forward. "OK, so
what are you after?"

"Your opinion on some additional mods. Mostly in the power
systems, and in reaction to that classified document you
left us."

Kerryn leaned back. "After the band is done. I'm here for
the music."

Turian's eyebrows rose, and Zink rolled his eyes. "Don't you
give a damn about anything?"

Kerryn nodded. "I've cargo to deliver to a civilization.
I've a ship to keep running and accounts to keep solvent.
Starfleet can fuck itself for all I care."

Turian and Zink looked at each other gravely. "OK. That's
not like you. But that is one of the reasons that we are
here too. The Director would like to know what your link to
Starfleet is."

Kerryn chilled. "Really? How curious. Why?"

Turian shrugged. Zink looked at him warily. "Why is
discussing it a problem?"

"It's very personal, in a way. I've spent a long time trying
to forget Starfleet."

"What did they do to you? C'mon, Kerryn, you can tell us. It
will just be between you, Turian, me, and the Director. I've
got to tell him."

Kerryn was stonily silent. Zink shrugged, and said, "Well,
I'll just ask someone else."

"They're all dead." Kerryn's voice echoed strangely. "The
only people who knew were killed in Rana 7."

Zink had done his homework. He had heard the ID declaration,
and that was during his period in Flight School. Suddenly,
it clicked. "You applied to Starfleet Academy, didn't you?"

With a long sigh, Kerryn shook his head. "Not exactly. I
applied to Starfleet Academy, but with the goal of testing
out of the basics."

"That explains a lot. How old were you?"

"Fourteen."

Turian asked the big question. "Did you get in?"

And then Kerryn laughed bitterly. "That's the problem. I
don't know. I was too young, it's true, but I know I passed
every exam except one. I can't believe they would fail me
all because of one. But I haven't heard anything from them
at all since leaving Earth almost three years ago."

The three were silent as the music seeped into Kerryn,
easing him into raw emotional oblivion. Not a word was said
for the next hour. Turian was thoughtful, and the music was
OK. Zink kept staring at Kerryn, and Kerryn kept watching
the band, although every time the doors opened he would cast
a wary glance towards them. His approval was what they
wanted. Whatever. But his curiosity began to build.

When the band was over, Kerryn lead them quickly out of the
FQ bar. "Don't ever hang around after the band when you are
this far out. There's guaranteed to be a brawl within
minutes." And sure enough, a crash and shouting was heard
emanating from the formerly peaceful haven.

They went onto the shuttle, and Kerryn had to stop before
getting on. "You aren't going to abduct me, are you?"

Jeez, thought Zink, is this what it is like out here? "No,
asshole. We just want to borrow you. We won't leave the
station."

They went onboard, and went over the changes. Defiant was a
new ship now, and Kerryn reworked all the modifications for
the cloaking device. It was obvious that Starfleet had
followed his directions, but had no idea why. With the new
systems, he saved them considerable complexity, and was
confident that if they ever got one that it would work well.

After six hours, they all sat back. Turian, again, was
impressed. "Kerryn, you've got a remarkable knowledge of
both Starfleet and Romulan systems. Where did the Romulan
come from?"

Kerryn grinned wearily. "Totentanz. It uses a singularity-
driven five by two pulsed warp core according to Romulan
designs and standards. I've maintained that drive now myself
for more than ten years."

"You then are entirely self-sufficient. A one-man
everything."

"We call ourselves boonies." And that made Turian snort.

"Well, whatever. Starfleet is in your debt." And then Zink
grinned. "Boonie or no, you have been made a permanent
Delegate of the Freighter Guild. And I will make sure the
Director doesn't discuss your Starfleet experience with
anyone. But it was damn lucky you had that id and
communicator."

They stood for a moment, not quite ready to separate, but
Kerryn gave in first. "Look, if you need more advice or
consulting, or just want to talk, it's OK. I am hard to
find, but only when in the Belt because subspace is patchy."

They nodded. "Thanks, Kerryn." And they left him, and he
went back to his ship, undocked, loaded his cargo, and was
off and away from Erzahler VI.

By the time the Belt was done this pass, he had turned
eighteen. Again, celebrated in silence, with one bourbon at
a bar at Koppel IV. The same bar where Doryn, his father and
he had discussed what they would do if the Guild was
threatened. Kerryn realized that he continued to make a
difference, both for the Guild and for the millions of
people who relied on him in the Aurigaen Belt. He was a
single point failure, he realized. If he somehow failed
them, there would be no one left to pick up the route.

Kerryn voiced his concern to the Guild regional manager in
that area, and three months later Kerryn found himself
rewarded by being given a fleet of six ships, each with
captains, who were to learn the route from him. Damn the
Guild, he thought wryly. Try to help, and they task you
double. Or six-fold, this time. So he led them all through
the torturous colonies, the hazards, and in each one they
all would gather in the bar, have a few drinks, polish the
arrival route and outline the departure route. Most of the
other ships were less graceful than Totentanz, but they
would get the job done.

Respect grew for this young, quiet and wild-looking boonie
Ship Master. When he wasn't in the Belt, and wasn't with
cargo he ran several reconnaissance missions with his ship,
using the cloaking device and his wily experience. Turian
and Zink visited him twice more, and the last time told him
that Defiant was working well but would be given to Deep
Space Nine since that was where the principal risk was.

He loved space. He loved the freedom, the independence. He
loved being able to satisfy the needs of his customers. His
ship hummed perfectly, and it was during his annual
inspection that a spark of ambition reawakened in his heart.

He was standing there with the lead inspector, who had as
usual just passed Totentanz with flying colors. The
inspector had grinned, nodded, and given the pad over for
Kerryn to approve. He did, and the inspector was about to
tuck it away when the signature pricked his interest.

"Ship Master still? With all the kind of work you've been
given, I'd have expected Commander by now."

Kerryn had laughed politely. "Commander needs a crew. I'm
still a bit of a one man show."

"Commander needs to demonstrate use of a crew, not have one
all the time."

Kerryn had looked at him squarely. "Do you really think a
one-man guy like me could be a CDR?"

The inspector carefully phrased his answer. "It's the next
step. You tell me once you've thought about it."

Kerryn thought it over. He got the paperwork, saw he was
overqualified in most areas except crew, although he might
squeak by on his Flight School scores. No, do it right. Get
a crew member, even only one, and put him through the
process.

Kerryn turned nineteen, again while in the Belt, this time
at Dulzian IV. Rana 7 was now back in business, and for the
first time since the battle he made port there. Rather than
build new, they had reconstructed the old starbase, and it
looked it. Kerryn vowed then if he ever had to rebuild
something on that scale, do it from scratch and do it the
right way. And from Rana 7, he was on to Starbase 277.

On his way to Starbase 277, the Navigation Computer bit the
dust. It was one of the oldest parts of the Totentanz, and
it had just exceeded a hundred lifetimes. Kerryn could
navigate this route manually, and did so. Sharing the Belt
routes had cut into his finances, and the Nav computer would
likely be expensive. What was worse was that Starbase 277
had signaled that it had no docking room, and so his cargo
exchange had been set to Starbase 290. It would be more
expensive, but he could get from 290 to Mobius II without a
problem on manual. And so he unloaded cargo at Starbase 290,
docked, and again Totentanz let him down. It blew an
evaporator in the life support system, and he would have to
get one from Salvage. Of course, they only had new ones, and
so that set him back more on the Nav computer. And what's
more, the FQ bar was closed for repairs. Damn. Grrrrr.

And so it was, slightly grumpy and feeling just a bit like
his ship was out to get him, he went to the mainline bar.
The music was OK and while the band was one he liked, he was
too late to hear them live, so instead he just caught up on
the route news as always. His routes stretched before him, a
long path of familiarity and Guild stability. Confident,
secure, although a little financially challenged right now,
Ship Master Kerryn of the Totentanz knew who he was, and was
satisfied that way. It was the start of a Legacy, in a way,
handed from his father to him. Someday he would pass it on
as his own legacy.

He had no idea what would take place as the doors opened to
admit the Starfleet officers and ensign that would destroy
and re-create his entire existence.

***

Kerryn released Jacen. So many things he had forgotten, so
many details. He had never seen Defiant on Deep Space Nine.
He hadn't seen Turian or Zink in years. Again, he was
outside the mainstream of the Guild although on some very
important routes, but they were all small ships. He didn't
get the supercargos like Tiny Tim, or the big battle ships
like Invincible. And he missed his little Turian Zephyr. But
it had been destroyed in the attack on Starbase 27.

Jacen stirred against him. Naked, still. He was seventeen.
Maybe that was what had started this; the memory that now he
was in Zink's role in a way, and Jacen was in his own
experience. Certainly Jacen had topped him well tonight. But
now his lover knew his whole history.

Eyes sought his, and they were filled with wonder and awe.
Damn, Kerryn thought. It's only me. And he tried to dispel
that wonder with a quirk of his eyebrows. "It's only me,
Jacen. All of that before still is only me."

Wonder melted to love. Deep love. And Jacen replied, slowly,
"And I am so very glad of that."

***

Author's Notes.

All the feedback I got was in favor of a prequel. So, here
it is. I hope you enjoyed it. Inspiration for some of this
matter came from the story of Defiant from Star Trek: Deep
Space Nine. Much inspiration for the Flight School came from
Orson Scott Card's fabulous book, "Ender's Game." The name
Totentanz was derived from the German, with interpretation,
from the Marienkirche organ (Kroger, 1622) in Lubeck,
Germany, which was referred to by that name with the English
translation, "Dance of Death."

Best regards,

The Journeyman Harper
journeymanharper@yahoo.com