Date: Mon, 5 Dec 2011 22:12:18 -0600 From: J Wolfstone Subject: Sons of Sparta, Book 3 - Chapter 13 Sons of Sparta - A Story of the Spartans, Book 3 (inspired by the story 'Spartan' parts 1 through 4) by argouru Note: All credit for the creation of the Spartans and Amazons, as well as the Spartan mythos belongs to the author 'CF', to whom I owe special thanks for his allowing me to write about these incredible people. WARNING: Portions of this installment of the series includes a section regarding mental illness. 13. Joshua stood within the entrance hall of the temple dedicated to His father, looking around with interest. The people who were there couldn't help but to stare at the immortal, who allowed His divine radiance to pour forth freely. He had figured that it would be pointless to conceal His identity, so was in His true form as Tina and Ahmed followed a step behind Him in their standard positions of attendance as Joshusite priests. Together, they let Sam in his role as Head Priest give them a guided tour of the temple. Sam showed them the food kitchen, armory, med center, daycare room where parents could let their children they had to bring to work with them stay during their daily duties, offices and altar room. Then he showed them the basement and stopped in the janitorial storeroom. "And here," he said with a flourish, "is the single most important item in the entire temple." The trio looked with confusion at the old rusted porcelain and steel device mounted to the wall. "It's... Just a tap and sink," Ahmed said, feeling baffled. "Ah-hah! Exactly!" Sam said wisely. "It's the -basement- sink." "Well what about it?" Tina asked. "It doesn't look like much." Joshua's face was impassive. ***Father?*** He asked His divine parent. He felt Apollo sigh inside His head. ***Just smile and nod, Joshua...*** Apollo said in an exasperated manner, so the British immortal did as instructed. "Well what's the point of a sink?" Ahmed asked, sounding slightly put out. "Now you can say that you've seen every part of the temple, of course," Sam said matter-of-factly. "You can tell your friends back home that you received the most painfully thorough tour of the temple possible and even discuss this at parties." Ahmed's mouth fell open. "And why would we possibly want to discuss such a thing?" "Oh come on!" Sam nearly pouted. "L-look at the quality! Look at the craftsmanship." He paused, staring at it with a look of realization. "Wow that thing is -really- rusting over fast!" he added, frowning at the dilapidated state of the faucet, which had rusted over almost completely. He shook his head sadly. "I told the janitors to keep me apprised of anything that needed repairs... I'll talk with them later... Well, that concludes the tour. Shall we?" he asked, gesturing for them to return upstairs. As they walked, Ahmed thought to Josh. *Is he mad?* ***No... Sam just has a warped sense of humor. Dad Apollo warned me about it in advance, but I have to admit that actually seeing it is something else entirely. Don't worry, he's more making fun of himself than anyone else.*** Ahmed sighed in disgust, but said and thought nothing more on the matter. Sam led them back to the main entrance and turned to them with a smile. "So what do you think?" Joshua smiled at the mortal. "You should be very proud, Sam... This place is truly amazing. Dad Apollo speaks of it from time to time and I know He's very grateful to you for creating it, as well as the one in Iowa. I'm glad I got to see it. Thanks for showing us around." "Well I'm glad you like the temple. You guys are heading home tomorrow?" "Yes," Joshua said. "My Dad Gabriel tends to worry, even though I'm immortal now." He reached into the man's mind, sensing hesitation, then smiled warmly. "Of course we'd love to come to dinner." "Huh?" Sam asked in shock, then looked flustered. "Isn't that cheating?" he teased with a smile. "Sorry, force of habit. I've had telepathy all my life and it's only natural to read the thoughts of others. Even though I don't require food, My priests need to eat, so we accept the invite," He said, sensing the agreement from both His partners. "Good," Sam said with a nod. "I know Henry wanted to see you once more before you left. Swing by around seven?" "We'll see you then," Joshua said with a smile... Life in a Spartan household was certainly different, John had to admit. He was up in the attic, going through his pitiful belongings and making sure that nothing was missing. It all seemed to be here, so he sat there, looking out the window at the roof of the temple next door, feeling lost and confused. It was as if his entire life had turned upside down and he no longer knew what to think or feel. *What's happening to me?* he thought. For the first time in his life, he wasn't either suffering a bout of depression or trying hard not to think about himself. With his mental illness and its intense self-hatred now gone, he felt as if a huge chunk of his life had been carved away. He had suffered for so long that he no longer knew how to think or feel about himself. He had spent the last eleven plus years waiting for his life to end, only enduring his painful existence while waiting for the day he would die and finally be free of his suffering. Death had been the only thing in life to look forward to and now he no longer wanted it. In truth, he didn't know what he wanted anymore. Every constant in his life was gone and replaced with things that felt as intangible as dreams to him. He literally had no clue as to what he should do now. The only thing that felt strong to him was his love for Henry. To be honest, he still didn't know what to think about that. Everyone seemed to expect him to settle down with the man, but how could he? John was used to everything in his life, save the depression and his family, being transitory. John still wasn't sure that Henry felt for him what he did for the Spartan. He wanted it to be true, but was unable to believe that it was real. Everyone else seemed somehow convinced that this was a sure thing, but John couldn't bring himself to be as certain as everyone else was. He was too used to things falling apart. Henry was very handsome and in John's experience, the men he'd always found to be gorgeous had never wanted anything to do with him. He'd practically had to pay them just to get the time of day. He didn't know what to think about Henry's behavior. Was Henry really in love with him too? He sighed. *What the fuck is wrong with me? Is Fred right? Am I so fucked up in the head that I can't figure myself out now that I'm well? My depression took up so much of my life and with it gone, I feel empty inside... Hollow. What do I fill that emptiness with? What do I do with my life now?* He didn't think that having children was a very good idea. What did he know about being a successful parent? He'd had... Past tense now... An alcoholic mother, a father who had abandoned the family shortly after he was born, a sister who had run away from home at age sixteen and no longer wanted anything to do with anyone else in the family and no other living relatives. Family wasn't exactly his strong suit, he had to admit. *This is crazy! I'm contemplating a future with a man I barely know who I can't get out of my head and miss so much right now that it's a wonder that I'm not in actual pain! Is this really love? Does he feel the same way about me? I just can't be sure. It's like I somehow fell instantly in love with him and now most of my life centers around him being a part of it. His whole family is so certain that this will work out, but nothing ever has for me before...* He waited to have another attack, but it never came. There was fear, nervousness and doubt, but not the self-hatred or criticism that normally engulfed him in times like this. No deprecating thoughts about himself, just what he guessed must be regular emotions. The effect was jarring and left him even more confused than before. Even his feelings were nothing like they were before. Life, both present and future had been so clear before... A present full of self-hatred and despair and a future that ended with his eventual death. Now there was nothing to fight except confusion and doubt. The present was upside down and the future a giant question mark... John had fought himself for so long that without it, he no longer had any purpose or direction. He didn't have the slightest clue as to what to do with his life anymore. The thought made him scared. He found himself wishing that Henry was here to comfort him right now. Henry seemed to be the one stable thing that offered any certainty in his life anymore. *I thought that once my depression was gone, everything would be a lot better... But with it gone, all I have now are questions. What am I going to do?* He felt weak and helpless. *Some man I am!* he chided himself gently, feeling a slight amount of self-criticism that didn't go any farther than that. John hated the idea of being effeminate, but also hated the concept of being super macho, so had tried to strike a neutral balance of behavior in his life. He'd always strived to be a strong and self-sufficient man... But right now he only felt weak, like a scared little child that wanted to be held... Henry wanted to hold him. He'd been the first person to do so in a very long time. John sniffed to himself, then found that he had been hugging himself in a fetal position without realizing he had been doing so. He let go of his legs and slowly got up. They only direction he could go now was forward. Whatever the future held, he had little choice but to wait and see what it brought to him. He only hoped that Henry would stay a part of it. His stomach growled then. *How can I be hungry at a time like this?* he wondered, shaking his head in disbelief as he made his way back down to the kitchen. At least an empty stomach was one problem he could fix right now. Everything else could wait... Henry arrived at his family's house, glad that the work day was over. It had been hard to get through his first day back to work since he'd found his partner, but the Spartan had endured by reminding himself that the lives of others depended on his reliability. He sighed. Being bonded was taking some serious adjustment on his part. As soon as he thought that, he felt guilty. *It's not John's fault he's so hurt inside. But Joshua has healed him, so everything will be alright.* He parked the car and headed into the house... Having grown up here, he had no need to knock. He found the house to be rather quiet which surprised him. "Anyone home?" he called out. "Henry?" John asked from the top of the stairs. "John," he said, seeing his partner standing at the top of the staircase, looking at him as though he was pleased but trying hard not to show it. "You're early," the human said gently, sounding half surprised and half pleased. "I... I wanted to see you again," he answered softly. John looked at Henry's clothes with a gentle frown. "That's your work uniform, right? Don't tell me you came here right from the hospital. You could've gone home and rested first. Dinner's not for another three hours, you know." "Oh," Henry said, his spirits falling. "I just thought..." John sighed, looking guilty. "That came out differently then I meant... It's good to see you, but you shouldn't skimp on rest just to be with me. It's not very healthy." "Yeah, I guess you're right. But still..." "You want to shower and rest before dinner?" "Good idea," Henry said. "I did think as far as bringing a change of clothes to work today. Let me go get them from the car." He walked back outside and took his duffle bag from the trunk of his car, then headed back to the house. *Why is he acting so strangely?* Henry wondered to himself as he went. *Is he hiding something from me?* He entered the house and heard water running upstairs. Curious, he headed to the second floor bathroom to find John fiddling with the tub. "Hey." "Hi." John said, turning to him nervously. "I warmed up the water. You... Like baths or showers?" "A shower's fine, thanks." "If you want to leave your work clothes outside," John said nervously, "I can run them through the washer for you." "No, please. We may be partners, but you don't have to wait on me like this. We're equals John." "Oh... Sorry," he said, looking uncertain as he moved out to the hallway in order to give the Spartan room inside the bathroom. Henry turned off the water, stepped out into the hallway, up to John and hugged him. John stood there tensely for a moment before he relaxed and returned the hug awkwardly. Henry noted the reaction with a mixture of sadness and deep thought. *It's as if he's never even been hugged before... Or at least not in so long that he can't remember what it's like... What did those people do to him to make him like this?* "I won't hurt you John," he said softly. "You're my partner and I love you. I don't know what all you've been through, but things will be better now." "I wish I could believe that," John said softly. "You're not still suffering from depression, are you?" Henry asked with concern, pulling back slightly to look the man in the eye. "I thought Joshua got rid of it." "He did..." John said, then hesitated, looking downward. "Then what is it?" He saw the pain on John's face and touched his cheek softly. "Please talk to me. I want to help you." John looked sad, his eyes growing moist. "I spent over eleven years either hating myself or trying hard not to have an attack... I never knew just how much of my life that took up. With it gone, it's like there's nothing left of me. Depression ate up my entire life and left nothing else. Now that I'm not sad, self-hating and suicidal, I... I don't know what to do with myself. That accident cost me everything. I lived, but lost my job, my home, even what little family I had left. Even the depression is gone... I don't have anything left to hold on to... I don't know who I am anymore. It's like the depression was the only thing there was about me. Now everything I knew and had is gone. I feel lost and alone now..." "You're not alone, John... You have me. My family is your family now too and as for a home, you have here now. My dads will let you stay as long as you need to. Dad Sam's offering you a job at the temple, but you don't have to take it if you don't want to. You can always look elsewhere. You have your diploma here, right? So-" He stopped at the look of shame and embarrassment on the human's face. "John...? You didn't graduate from high school?" "I never actually made it that far," he said quietly. "Why not?" Henry asked gently, seeing that this was a sensitive issue for the man. "I moved around constantly as a kid. When I was enrolled in school, I was already a year behind everyone else as I didn't get registered in time and had to wait until I was seven to start school. Then when I was twelve, I was having a lot of family trouble at home and didn't put very much into my lessons and fell too far behind, so I flunked that year and was held back. When I was fifteen, we ended up homeless and had to live in an old trailer in an old church parking lot and it was outside the range of the buses and school districts, so I missed a third year. The next year I tried to go back to school, but the junior high said I was too old to attend and they turned me away. I tried faking my way into high school by saying my school records had been destroyed in a fire, but without proof I'd graduated junior high, they wouldn't let me in, so I was cheated out of the rest of my education. I was about a month shy of finishing seventh grade when I stopped going to school. So I never made it to high school, let alone graduated." He hung his head, feeling ashamed. "What about a G.E.D.?" Henry asked. "You could always get that." "A what?" John asked, looking up in confusion. "General Equivalency Diploma. It means you know the basics and counts the same as a high school diploma in most places. Lots of people have them, even some actors." John thought it over. "I guess I could try that," he said slowly. "Okay then... I'll help you study up for it. Don't be ashamed, John. It could happen to anyone... I don't think any less of you for it." "But still... Working in the temple wouldn't be too bad. I don't mind." "Good... But don't think we're trying to convert you. Whatever you want to believe is fine with me. I'm Apolline, but you don't have to be if you don't want to. I just want you to be happy." "Thanks," John said with a timid smile. "We'll figure things out together John, don't worry... I'm here for you. I love you." "I love you too," John said. He looked nervous but willing, so Henry kissed him. The kiss became more tender, but they stayed with only that, exploring each other's mouths for well over five minutes. Finally, they pulled apart gently. "So that's what kissing is like," Henry said softly. "You've never kissed before?" John asked with shock. Henry shook his head. "You're my first. I've... Never been with anyone. I know what to do, but haven't actually done anything." "You're a virgin?" John asked with surprise. "But you're gorgeous! You must've had guys all over you before." "I never got that way with anyone. I took care of all that by myself." "It's okay," John said hugging him. "I don't think any less of you for it." After a few moments, his nose wrinkled and he pulled away. "No offense, but you really need that shower." Henry laughed and made his way alone into the bathroom... After he showered and changed, Henry came out of the bathroom, still wondering where everyone was. "John?" "In here," the human said, poking his head out of the bedroom door. The Spartan moved to the doorway to see John putting a few more of his things away in their new places within his room. It felt odd to see the man now residing in what Henry still thought of as the twins' room. He remembered how he'd thrown a fit the day the family had first moved in here and they had taken this room after guessing right at a game Dad Sam had them play to see if they or Henry would get first pick. He had felt better a few months later when they complained about how hot the room got in the summertime, whereas his own north-side room remained cooler. "How are you settling in?" he asked. John shrugged. "Okay, I guess. It hasn't even been a full day, though, so no way to really tell yet. Although your brothers... They're very strange." He blushed, thinking back on something. "Is Fred always that forward?" Henry sighed with disgust. "What did he do this time? I swear, it's like he has to make a scene all the time." John blushed. "It's nothing," he said simply, but Henry could tell that it wasn't. "What happened?" he asked. "He... Kind of tested me... To make sure I was loyal to you." Henry muttered under his breath. "I swear I'm going to... Damn... I can't think of anything to do to him that he wouldn't get off on! Having a leather man for a brother is a real pain in the ass sometimes. How far did he take things?" he asked calmly. "He tried to kiss me and grabbed my ass. When I told him I didn't want to hurt you, he let go and told me I'd passed the test." The Spartan sighed, then walked over and hugged John, who once again hesitated for a moment before returning the embrace. "It's okay John," he said softly. "I forgive you... Thanks for thinking of me first." "I didn't want to cheat on you again... Even if the first time was because I didn't know it was you." "John, stop beating yourself up over it. I knew what He had to do before He went into the room with you. I didn't like the idea of it, but you deserve to be well, so I went along with it." "But... I really thought it was you. I kissed Him... And told Him that I loved Him. I really thought that it was you." "I love you John. That's all that matters. I already forgave you, alright? So just let it go. The only thing that matters to me is that you're well now." "I guess," John said, still sounding guilty. "But with the depression gone, I don't know what to do with myself anymore." "We'll figure it out together." Henry suddenly realized just how worn out he was from the workday and yawned before he could stop himself from doing so. "Told you that you should've rested after work first," John said with a hint of amusement. "You want to lay down for awhile?" "I think so. Wanna join me?" Okay," John said nervously. Henry saw the hesitation. "We don't have to do anything more than cuddle," he said gently. John nodded, and they laid down together on the bed, Henry spooning up behind John. As they settled into place, Henry sighed in contentment. "This is nice," he said softly, almost whispering. It took several moments for John to relax and get into it, but he finally settled into place and the tension left his body. "I kinda like it too." "No one's ever done this for you?" John shook his head silently. "Why not?" "I've never been in a relationship," the human said softly in a sad tone. "No one ever seemed to want me for more than a quick fuck before." "Well, we don't have to do anything like that until you're ready. Don't feel obligated to have sex just because we're partners, okay?" "Okay," John said, relaxing further. Before they knew it, they had fallen asleep, still snuggled together... Henry awoke about an hour later, the house still quiet, and looked to see John still sleeping. He had rolled over to face the Spartan, who gazed at his slack face. The lines of tension were slowly fading from his face, but still lingered. Henry wondered what all had happened to this man to make him end up such a sad and self-hateful person. The depression was gone, but the scars of it were still with him and might very well be for the rest of his life. How horrible had his life been that he had been driven to suicide? Henry had mostly talked about himself during their time together in the hospital, not out of egotism, but because John had expressed a wish to avoid talking about himself. The way he'd acted a while ago only proved that he had a hard time being comfortable around others. As far as Henry knew, John had no friends and hadn't even been close to his fellow employees at the car wash he had worked at. His mother and her boyfriend had treated him horribly and his sister shunned all of the family, him included. If there were other relatives besides the father who had disappeared long ago, John had never mentioned them. He seemed all alone in the world now. *Kind of like Dad Sam, but he was an orphan, whereas John was stuck with a horrible excuse for a family. It's as if no one was ever truly kind to him or fought for him before. I can tell that he loves me, but it's like he doesn't know how to show it. I've been a real asshole, that's for sure* he thought, feeling guilty about how he had behaved about being bonded. *I was always worried about how the bond would affect me, but I never even considered that my potential partner would actually need me more than I would need him. John just wants to feel safe, loved and happy, but still can't figure out what to do with it all now that he has it. I love him... And he needs me. I'll have to be patient and give it time, I guess. Show him how decent people behave.* John sighed in his sleep, making Henry smile. *On a shallow note, however, it doesn't hurt anything that he's so incredibly gorgeous, too.* Just then, the front door slammed closed. "We're home!" Steven bellowed from the front entryway. John bolted awake in alarm, rising rapidly and looking shocked. "Relax," Henry said soothingly. "It's just my fourth brother Steven. Have you met him yet?" "Uh... No, I haven't," John said weakly, calming down. There had been a vague ghost of fear when he'd been startled awake, like he was used to people screaming. "Yo! Anyone home? Human guy? You here?" "Knock it off!" Henry shouted back. "Henry? That you?" "Yeah!" "Didn't waste any time with him, did you?" Fred shouted. "I did not w-!" he began, then sighed with disgust. "Come on, before Fred tries sneaking up to spy on us, thinking we're having wild sex!" "Is he... Always like that?" John asked weakly. "Only since he hit puberty. Fred's the family sex freak... Open to anything and likes most of it. Pervert! At least he has enough sense to always play safe! Come on, I bet they're getting started on dinner." "I guess..." John said hesitantly. Henry looked at him sadly. "We won't hurt you John. We're nothing like those horrible people you grew up with. We're a -real- family and we'll treat you right." He held out his hand. "Come on," he finished gently. John rose, looking embarrassed. "I guess I'm acting pretty stupid, huh?" "You're not stupid, John... I think you're just far too used to being hurt by people. But we're not like that. We Spartans value our family, even when they drive us crazy," Henry finished, glaring at the doorway. "Come on, Steven and the twins have been eager to meet you." John took Henry's offered had and together they headed downstairs. Steven was waiting for them. "There you are! You must be Jim." He said, holding out his hand in offering. "John, actually. Jim's my-... -Was- my roommate." "Sorry," Steven said sincerely as they shook hands. "I was always bad with names." Beside him was another man in his early twenties, who smiled in greeting and shook hands with John. "I am Giorgos," he said in a thick Greek accent. "Steven's partner. You are human?" "Yeah," John said. Giorgos nodded with approval. "Good. I will not be alone, then." Steven turned to him with a smile. "Granddad David is coming too, you know. So technically there'll be three of you." "Even better," Giorgos said with a gleam of amusement in his eyes. "We cannot let these Spartans think they are the only men who live." Steven sighed, looking to Henry with an expression of suffering. "Don't look at me," the older brother said, raising his hands. "You're the one bonded to him." Just then, the door opened and two men who looked exactly the same entered. "There you guys are," Henry said. "Marcus and Jason Samson, I'd like you to meet my partner, John Williams." "Hi," the one man said, "I'm Marcus," he said, shaking hands with the human. "Nice to meet you," John said nervously. "And I'm Jason," the other man said. As they shook hands, John noted with shock that the twins had different colored eyes. Jason's were a deep blue like the ocean on a clear day, whereas Marcus had eyes that were a vivid bottle green. Suddenly, Jason turned to glance at Marcus and smiled, turning back to John. He then looked back to his brother again, who shrugged. Marcus raised an eyebrow and Jason looked thoughtful, then sighed, looking wistful. Marcus smiled at John. "It's very good to meet you, John. We're glad Henry finally found his partner. Don't worry, you'll fit into the family just fine." John stood there for a moment, wondering why the two of them were acting so oddly. He had gotten the oddest feeling while watching them that the two had been somehow talking to each other. *Weird,* he thought to himself as Sam, Ash and Will came in with the groceries. "Come on," Sam said. "These pork chops won't cook themselves. Hey John," he said, smiling as he passed the human, "Lend a hand?" John looked at Henry uncertainly and Sam smiled. "You too, Henry." "Sure," the oldest son said, following his partner, siring father and youngest brothers into the kitchen...