This Strange World Needs A Kicking! – Ch. 14
By Laura S. Fox
Copyright © 2021 Laura S. Fox
All Rights Reserved
Gay Romance
Intended for Mature Audiences Only
This story will contain graphic depictions of sexual intercourse, strong
language and it is not meant for readers who are less than 18 years of age.
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Chapter Fourteen –
Vocabulary Problems
Apparently, Prince
Sebastian's body could do many things, but surviving underwater for more than
any other human being wasn't among them. Kai came back to the surface and
inhaled noisily.
Three pairs of eyes were staring
at him from up close. These guys didn't have any idea about what personal space
meant, for real.
"I think this water's too
hot. I need to get out."
Galien
pushed against his shoulder playfully. "Don't even think about it, Sebastian.
Life in the countryside can be quite boring. I'm dying for some palace gossip."
"Kelonia
is hardly the countryside," Pepin argued. "Your duchy is famous for the
beautiful balls your family throws, Master Galien."
Kai wasn't entirely sure
whether Pepin was complimenting Galien or wanted to
contradict him. What was sure, however, was that Pepin's light pink nipples
looked absolutely –
What the hell was he
thinking now? His mouth was dry, and he had the crazy impulse of wanting to
suck on Pepin's nipples just to see how they tasted like.
"No way," he whispered to
himself. "I'm a total perv."
"What's that, a perv?" Pepin asked and moved slowly to his right.
Galien
and Conrad chose the opposite side so they could face him. Still, Kai only had
eyes for Pepin. Such dudes could only exist in BL shows. The curve of his neck
belonged to magazine covers, and his skin was unblemished. His amazingly blue
eyes were fringed by dark blond eyelashes that looked curly and long from up
close. His lips were so soft, parted in slight hesitation, and so full. And
their color... just reminded him of the last time he had tasted strawberries. Not
that they were that red, but surely they had to be just as delicious. He could
still recall Pepin's kiss as being the sweetest thing he had ever had.
Now, that had to be the
steam getting to his head.
Kai bit hard his bottom
lip and began chewing on it. That should do for now to stop the munchies.
"Sebastian, is it polite
of you to ignore your guest of honor so that you can gaze upon your manservant?
In a manner that leaves the rest of the audience rather vexed, if I may add," Galien said teasingly.
Kai shook his head and
frowned. Galien quirked an eyebrow and challenged him
with a sly smile. "I heard you proposed to Pepin," he said.
To his ears, Sebastian's
royal voice sounded petulant, like a kid's that just got his candy taken
away.
"You heard?" Galien chuckled. "That was three years ago, and you didn't
seem troubled by it."
Ah, right. Nevertheless,
he would not be caught wrong-footed this time around. "What I meant is that I
heard that you proposed to him again," he said triumphantly.
Galien
shrugged. "And? What of it? Don't you have Conrad? I must say," his voice
dropped to a seductive whisper, "that the fallen prince of Estfalia
is even more enthralling than the tales made him to be."
Conrad threw Galien a haughty look.
"A true challenge," Galien added, "but not for you, dear cousin, of course. May
I touch him? He has such gorgeous shoulders." The way the duke rounded the
vowels as he spoke was tickling Kai's ears like some kind of ASMR. He put one
pinky in his right ear to get rid of the sensation.
"Do that, and I won't be
responsible for the fate that will befall you, Sir Galien,"
Conrad said through his teeth.
"So hot to handle." Galien sank into the water and sighed in delight. "You're
everything I expected and more, Sir Conrad." He made no move to touch Conrad.
Most probably, he didn't want to end up with a broken arm or something. Kai
wasn't sure he would intervene. After all, this troublesome cousin was why he
was in such a difficult position right now.
Pepin stood at a polite
distance, but Kai found himself drawn to him despite whatever his rational
thoughts wanted to insist on, like how he wasn't really a BL character, and he
couldn't find a dude cute.
"So, about that
assassination attempt," Galien suddenly said.
Kai straightened up and
forgot about staring at Pepin. That was serious. As OP as he was, he couldn't
ignore the possibilities regarding someone trying to get rid of the obnoxious
prince. BL story or not, he didn't want to gamble on bad endings and whatnot.
If this was a game, and his choices influenced the final resolution, he needed
to take it all into consideration.
"How did you learn about
it?" he asked.
Galien
no longer looked like the social butterfly from earlier. His eyes were shrewd,
and he was staring at Kai like there were words in there that couldn't be
spoken. What was that all about now?
"I have my sources," Galien said rather bluntly.
Kai didn't miss the short
glance the duke threw at Conrad. Could it be that Galien
suspected the royal concubine of being involved in that failed attempt at his
life? But he had taken that poisoned blade right to the belly, so it couldn't
be.
"Conrad got hurt, as I
told you," he said out loud.
"I know," Galien replied, and a small smile followed. "How is it, Sir
Conrad, to feel so strongly for your captor that you are willing to put your
life at risk for him? Sebastian must truly be an exquisite lover."
Conrad set his chin high.
"How crass of you, Sir Galien. One doesn't mention
such details in polite company."
"Will you two cut it
out?" Kai intervened. "Let's talk about that assassin," he added quickly, after
two pairs of eyes set on him, filled with unspoken questions. "He was a dude
about this tall," he gestured, "wore all black, and he was really, but really
suspicious. Kind of like a ninja."
"What's a ninja?" Galien asked, his shrewd eyes still inspecting Kai.
"A dude in black that's
really, really suspicious," he replied in a deadpan voice.
Galien
quirked an eyebrow, and his lips twisted. Then, taking everyone by surprise, he
began laughing. "I see."
"You see what?" Kai
asked.
This time, the clever
eyes left his face to turn toward Conrad. "Why even the proud prince of Estfalia would put himself between the man he presumably
hates and a poisoned blade."
"And why is that?" Kai
questioned further.
"Because," Galien blinked lazily as he looked at him, "you appear to
have changed, just as the prophecy foretold."
Kai rolled his eyes.
"What's that prophecy about, anyway?"
Galien
ignored him. "You should allow Pepin to leave your side. I'd be happy to have
him. Even if you touched him, I wouldn't mind. I'm not exactly a chaste flower
myself."
That earned an offended
sputter from the manservant. "I am untouched!" Pepin protested.
Kai put his arm in front
of him just in time to bar a vicious but cute little dog from shredding Galien to pieces and turn the water crimson.
"That's great news!" Galien said, seemingly unaffected by furious pretty eyes
and clenched fists.
Kai turned toward Pepin.
"Don't mind my cousin. He's just talking smack, okay?"
Galien
clapped in unhidden delight. "What strange expressions you have added to your
vocabulary, Sebastian. What's the meaning of this word, smack? And where did
you pick them?"
Right. He needed to watch
his mouth. So far, people had been too afraid of the real Prince Sebastian to
question his new quirks, but the duke was a different matter. He was
Sebastian's equal, not to mention a clever character that must have known the
prince since they had both been in diapers.
"From some barbarians,"
Kai replied. "They were talking weird, and it just rubbed off on me."
He could tell even
without looking that Galien didn't buy such obvious
lies.
"It might have been part
of the prophecy," the duke commented, and it was so clear that he didn't think
that for a moment. "Now let's enjoy our bath. We'll have plenty of time to talk
during my stay here."
It was on the tip of
Kai's tongue to ask how long exactly Galien intended
to stay but stopped. He needed to act more royal, and showing how annoying he
thought his cousin to be wasn't at all along those lines.
"Would you like me to
massage your shoulders, Your Majesty?"
Pepin's voice so close
startled him. "No, I'm good, I'm good," he hurried to say.
"Maybe His Majesty wants
Conrad to do it," Galien said in an insinuating
voice.
"No!" Kai protested
loudly. "I'm like completely chill. I don't want a massage or whatever."
"Pepin," Galien added in the same teasing voice, "be careful. It
appears that your presence so close to our esteemed protector affects him
greatly."
Kai narrowed his eyes.
"No, really. In what way?"
Galien
quirked both eyebrows and then let his eyes travel slowly across his body, even
the part obscured from view.
Kai looked down. His
cousin couldn't see through all that steam, right? Nonetheless, he closed his
legs and placed his hands in front.
"I made you look," Galien said and laughed.
Kai scoffed and turned
away from him. And Pepin. And Conrad. Couldn't they see he was suffering?
***
With the fluffy robe on,
he felt much more protected from Galien's wandering
eyes. The duke was completely shameless, staring at each of them and commenting
on their bodies. He was a wild BL character. Pepin had blushed while Galien praised his slim waist and perfect skin. Conrad had
replied with small huffs and grunts as the duke proposed that he would pose for
a renowned painter only so that he could look at him whenever he wanted.
The annoying cousin was,
therefore, the soul of the party. They were gathered around a low table on
which various delicious foods were displayed. Kai complimented Pepin on doing a
swell job on the table arrangement and got a shy smile in return.
He was a great cook, and
all praises were deserved.
"Why do you insist on not
marrying Pepin off to me?" Galien asked with an
exaggerated sigh as he delicately took a small canapé and admired it. His robe
was opened in front, and Kai could stare at his chest. Did every dude in this
world have perfect pecs? At least, it was natural for Conrad to have them,
being a warrior and all that, but the duke didn't in the least look like a guy
who cared about fighting too much.
"So that you can keep him
in the kitchen?"
Galien
chuckled, making Kai shudder. Yeah, if he ever traveled to the modern world or
whatever Kai's real world was to these people, the duke would be an ASMR star
for sure.
"Oh, but it is not the
kitchen where I intend to keep him," came the reply. "It is --"
"No, no, I don't want to
know," Kai said quickly.
"Why?" Galien feigned innocence.
"Because I know you'll
say something dirty, like your bed or something."
There was no answer to
that. Kai examined his so-called cousin, and the dude just kept staring at him
with the same sly smile on his face.
"What?" he asked,
unnerved by that pointed look.
"Nothing. I'm just
wondering whether you've been asleep or blind this whole time and just opened
your eyes or --"
To his surprise, Galien stopped. His smile didn't fade, but for some reason,
he didn't want to say what he had been about to say.
"Or?" he insisted.
"Or there's more to you
than even the prophecy cared to tell us," Galien said
promptly.
Kai had a feeling his
cousin was keeping things from him, but he couldn't just insist. Maybe if they
drank something, Galien's tongue would become a bit
loose.
"What's the strongest
stuff we have?" he asked Pepin in a low whisper. "You know, alcohol."
The servant gave him a
surprised stare. "Your Majesty and such delights do
not agree too well with one another."
"It's not for me. It's
for Galien. He keeps things from me," Kai put it
bluntly.
Pepin nodded. "I'll see
what I can do." He stood and walked out of the room.
"I hope you didn't send
your manservant away for fear that I would snatch him from underneath your very
eyes," Galien commented. "I am a seducer, as you know
it well. I will convince Pepin to follow me to my estate on his own accord."
"I'm sure," Kai said dryly.
"I assure you, Sir Galien," Conrad said after keeping silent until now, "that
His Majesty's possessiveness of his manservant has nothing to do with romantic
feelings. It is a matter of loyalty," he added courteously. "He trusts Pepin
with his life, and it would be cruel of you to separate them."
Good boy Conrad!
"Oh, I see. Since we're
on matters of possessiveness, don't you feel at least a tad jealous of the
attention Sebastian has bestowed all evening upon the servant in question?"
The molten lava eyes set
on Kai. "Not in the least. His Majesty bestowed his unbridled passion upon me.
If he had ever cared about doing the same to his servant, he would have done so
by now."
And... you ruined it!
Still, Kai couldn't be
upset about it. As far as facts stood, Conrad had a point. If Sebastian had
ever wanted Pepin like that, he could have had him like a thousand times. But
how could the prince be so unaffected by a bishonen
like his servant? That was beyond his comprehension.
Given that Sebastian
liked dudes, of course. Not from where Kai stood or anything like that.
Pepin entered, holding a
black bottle with a golden inscription on the front. Kai looked closer and
noticed that the strange letters seemed alive. "What's that?" he asked.
The servant smiled and fiddled
with a small cup which he offered to Galien. "His
Majesty doesn't treat just any guest to this."
Galien
took the cup and raised it. "To golden truths, then. But, please, Pepin, don't
be a cheapskate now that you plundered the royal reserve of this incredible
delight. Get everyone a cup. Including yourself," he added with his signature
sly smile.
Hmm, why was he smiling?
Kai narrowed his eyes even more. And what was that thing about golden truths?
"Your Majesty," Pepin
interrupted his train of thought. "Should I proceed as Master Galien suggested?"
Kai had never had more
than a glass of beer once. But, he couldn't back down that he had been
challenged. He would just dip his lips in it and pretend to drink. According to
Pepin, Sebastian didn't like alcohol, so nobody would hold it against him if he
didn't drink it all.
***
Sebastian had to postpone
any worries he had about Kai playing his role as the protector of Ifigia since there were other challenges ahead. For years,
he had heard of a prophecy concerning a change in the Ice Prince that some
thought it would happen because of him falling in love with someone, while
others because of much more nefarious causes. Like many other prophecies in his
world, this one was ambiguous and leaving too much room for interpretations. He
hadn't given it much thought until now, but the current events no longer
allowed him to overlook it.
What if the prophecy
could have foreseen this strange thing that had caused him to travel through
space and time to a completely different world and inhabit someone else's body?
It was a possibility and one he would have to explore at large once he had the
time.
For now, pressing matters
required more attention on his part. Milo was dressed in black pants that
hugged his lower body nicely and a black t-shirt adorned in the same fashion as
the one he had seen Beatrice wearing. He had also placed a small stud in his
left ear, and Sebastian felt intrigued and enticed by it. Something of how the
little stone shone in Milo's earlobe made him want to grab it with his teeth
and tease its owner.
Milo had also done
something with his hair. It looked slightly wet and sexy, and Sebastian could
hardly stop himself from imagining how it would feel to run his hands through
those blond strands and enjoy their silkiness.
He had opted for the same
plain clothes that Kai had in his wardrobe. The cosplay outfit was stashed away
in Milo's bag, and that gave him the much-needed confidence that he would
succeed in earning the contest prize.
"You're staring." Milo
threw him a shy smile. "Not that I mind, but I'd like to know what you're
thinking."
"You're beautiful,"
Sebastian said promptly. "Why are you with..." he was about to say Kai, "me?"
"You're beautiful, too.
Oh, gawd, you're making me say corny stuff again."
"Compared to you, I'm
barely above average."
"I'm sure you don't look
in the mirror much." Milo shook his head. "You're cute as hell. Good thing
you're an airhead because that's the only thing that kept the girls from our
school away from you."
"I have no interest in
girls. Not that kind of interest," Sebastian hurried to say.
"That's great to know.
Hey, we're almost here. We'll search for B and her band, first, and ask her if
she has the time to help us with your makeup."
Sebastian stopped in front
of the entrance and stared at the doors that looked like they had been painted
with tar. "Is this a portal to the underworld?" he asked. A lot of young people
dressed in the same fashion as them were gathered there. They were laughing,
talking, or using their phones. That sort of crowd attending a funeral seemed
out of the ordinary, if not downright disrespectful.
Milo patted his shoulder.
"It's just The Pit. Let's get inside."
Sebastian didn't ask
anything more and let himself pushed through the doors. Inside, the crowd was
much denser, and the people were cheering while a group of musicians was on a
stage in front. He was starting to get that there was no funeral involved, only
an entertainment event of sorts, one addressed to the masses that appeared to
be in a state of exultation at the loud music blaring in their ears.
"B said they would be on
stage after this band," Milo shouted in his ear. "So let's go behind the stage
and search for her."
Sebastian was in utter
shock at everyone shouting and jumping. That was certainly not a way to enjoy
music. He followed Milo, squeezing his hand tightly so that they didn't get
lost from one another. It served that Milo was tall and could carve a way for
them through that jolly crowd, not that he did that forcefully, but with many
apologies.
He took one gulp of air
as soon as they were in a long hallway, and the infernal music was muffled by a
door closing behind them. B was there and waved at them happily when she saw
them. She was just outside a room and had a stick in her mouth from which blue
smoke rose. "My dudes," she exclaimed as soon as she saw them. She removed the
burning stick to kiss them both on the cheeks. She smelled of smoke even. Maybe
that was part of a ritual.
Sebastian scrunched up
his nose.
"We'll need some help
because you're staring at the next cosplayer star of all times if only you gave
us a hand," Milo said. He pushed Sebastian toward her.
Beatrice grinned. "Got
your text. Let's go inside and I'll take care of everything, but let me finish
my smoke. Want some?" She pulled a paper pack from her pocket and offered it to
them.
"My body is a temple,"
Milo said jokingly. "Can't, sorry, need my lungs for practice."
Beatrice shrugged. "No
problem. What about you, Kai? Do you smoke?"
She looked at him like he
wouldn't be capable of burning a stick. "I do," he said with confidence and
pulled a stick from the pack she kept open.
"Since when?" Milo asked.
Sebastian watched
intensely as Beatrice brought a small implement to his face and made fire. He
placed the stick in his mouth as he had seen Beatrice doing and stared as the
fire touched the tip. So, what was next? Was he supposed to keep it like that
and watched it burn?
He inhaled a little, and
a sudden cough made his throat tight. Milo pulled the stick out of his mouth
and made a move to hand it back to Beatrice. "He doesn't smoke. I have no idea
what got into him." He patted Sebastian on the back to help him regain his
breath.
"It doesn't mean that I
don't want to try," he protested, but his eyes were already in tears.
"You don't," Milo said
and no longer seemed like his usual carefree self. For some reason, he seemed
upset over his desire to inhale through that burning stick.
Sebastian felt annoyed by
that reaction. Milo wasn't his tender or anything like that. If he wanted to
smoke, he could. So he grabbed the stick back and defiantly put it into his
mouth again.
"Go slow, man," Beatrice
told him with a grin.
Milo pursed his lips and
frowned. Then he looked saddened for some reason. Sebastian could tell that his
boyfriend disagreed and expected him to start talking. Nothing like that
happened, and Beatrice began chatting about her band right away.
The stick wasn't pleasant
at all, but Sebastian kept at it stoically, mimicking Beatrice's moves and
trying to fight off the cough that came with each time he inhaled too deeply.
She looked so self-assured, and that was something he needed in this new world
with its strange rules.
***
"You're friggin' sexy," Beatrice praised him as she helped him put
on the wig.
Milo had kept quiet most
of the time, but since they had attended Beatrice's band's performance, it
hadn't been like they could make normal conversation. Edible Insanity had a
reputation for being loud, and that was about everything Sebastian could tell
about it. Now, everyone was getting ready for the cosplay event, which had
brought him there, in front of that mirror, with Beatrice fussing around him
and applying strange substances on his face.
Even more than at Milo's
house when he had tried on the clothes for the first time, he indeed looked
attractive.
"Are you sure you want
all the world to see your boyfriend like this?" Beatrice teased Milo.
"Yeah," Milo replied and
added nothing else.
The girl moved her eyes
slowly between them, hesitated for a moment, but then kept quiet. Whatever it
was that she wanted to say, she eventually settled for keeping it to
herself.
"Well, good luck, then,"
she said and gave Sebastian a short hug.
Milo took him by the
shoulders as they walked out. "You are sexy," he whispered as he pushed
Sebastian down the hallway. "You'll get that prize."
That was all he needed to
hear. He was there, after all, with one purpose in mind.
TBC
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