This Strange World Needs A Kicking! – Ch. 7
By Laura S. Fox
Copyright © 2021 Laura S. Fox
All Rights Reserved
Gay Romance
Intended for Mature Audiences Only
This story will contain graphic depictions of sexual intercourse, strong
language and it is not meant for readers who are less than 18 years of age.
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Chapter Seven – Am I
Supposed To Make Dragons Cry?
Luckily, Pepin was
already inside the royal chambers, busy dusting around with a feathery
implement.
"What happened?" he asked
and hurried to them.
"Conrad's hurt. Bring the
court's physician," Kai said in a steady voice. It was all a fantasy or a dream
or a BL show, and probably he would get pulled to the real world anytime soon,
but that didn't mean that he would take the situation lightly.
"Right away," Pepin
replied without asking for additional details.
Kai carried Conrad to the
bed and helped him lie down. "Are you all right? Any nausea? Dizziness? Is your
whole life flashing before your eyes?"
Conrad tried to laugh,
but then he winced in pain. "Why are you so different?" he asked.
"I'm not. That's who I
really am," Kai retorted.
"Then I've been told a
lot of lies," Conrad whispered, and his eyelids grew heavy.
"Hey, hey, don't you dare
feint on me. I have no idea what to do if you suddenly died."
Conrad's eyes snapped
open. "Why would you care?" he asked, looking pretty suspicious of Kai's
reasons to say such things.
"How could I not? You're
in my care or something."
"Why would you feel
responsible?" Conrad insisted. "I am but a tool for you to use."
Oh, please, don't say it.
Conrad continued. "Your concubine,
your slave to use as you wish."
Kai closed his eyes,
squeezed them hard, and then released a drawn heavy sigh. "It's only because
you insist," he said and pointed a finger at Conrad.
"Don't worry, Your
Majesty. I know you would quickly discard me if I failed to have my uses." His
eyelids were closing again.
Kai snapped his fingers
in front of him. "You didn't lose that much blood, right? Why do you keep
falling asleep?"
"It... hurts," Conrad
hissed. "I'm so tired."
"No," Kai said in a
determined voice. "No, you're not allowed to sleep. I have no idea why you
shouldn't, but that's how they say in those – I mean, I order you to stay
awake, dammit!"
The doors opened, and
Pepin, followed by a man with long grey hair, rushed in.
"Your Majesty," the physician
said and took a long and unnecessary bow.
"Yes, yes, I know. Just
come here and fix him."
The physician didn't have
to be told twice. He stepped closer to the patient and began examining him. Kai
moved out of the way, not wanting to interfere with the medical act, whatever
it entailed in this world.
Pepin touched his arm.
"Who did this to Conrad?"
"A suspicious hooded
figure," Kai said promptly.
"Are you joking?"
"I'm serious," Kai
protested. "I think it was someone sent to assassinate me."
"Assassinate? And you
didn't call the guards?" Pepin raised his voice.
Kai shushed him. "There's
a patient in the room, what the hell? And he was gone, like in an instant.
Plus, I had to take Conrad to safety."
Pepin appeared surprised.
"You let the assassin get away," he said slowly like he was just starting to
realize something.
"Well, if it means so
much to you, go and tell the guards to search the castle for suspicious hooded
figures. Actually, not so hooded, since Conrad grabbed his robe. He was dressed
all in black if that helps."
"The robe, where is it?"
Pepin asked impatiently.
"In the hallway, where
the attack took place."
"Let's go get it, and you
can inform the guards on our way to search for this assassin."
"It sounds like a waste
of time, but as you wish," Kai said, a tiny bit vexed. "Hey, who's ordering who
around here, um?"
Pepin threw him a pointed
look. "With all due respect, Your Majesty, you appear to forget how important
you are for the kingdom of Ifigia."
It hadn't occurred to Kai
until now that he hadn't even known the name of the place where he had been
transported by, apparently, a whim of fate. "Again, Pepin, I'm not letting this
guy," he pointed at Conrad, "die on my watch."
"Why?" Pepin asked and
pouted like a petulant child. "Are you in love with him?"
Kai groaned. "Stop being
jealous. I just don't like it, you know, people dying and stuff."
"So you're not in love
with him," Pepin concluded for himself.
"He's a dude," Kai said.
"Why would I be in love with him?"
Pepin exhaled, more relaxed
now. "Should we see about that robe, Your Majesty?"
"All right, let's go, if
it means so much to you. Will Conrad be safe, only with the physician here?"
"Why wouldn't he?" Pepin
asked.
"Well, there's an
assassin on the loose," Kai pointed out. Maybe he was a scatterbrain, but Pepin
didn't seem much different. The servant seemed to have already forgotten about
calling the guards and ordering a full-scale manhunt.
"Yes, the assassin,"
Pepin said, and his alertness returned in full force. "After you, Your Majesty. And are you sure that you're not doing this
because you love Conrad?"
"Oh, shut up already, you
annoying jealous..." Kai hesitated, not knowing what to say so that it didn't
sound too insulting to those delicate and quick to pass judgment ears.
"I am not jealous," Pepin
said airily. "Just concerned."
"Yeah, concerned someone
might take your place. Don't worry, Conrad seems like the kind of guy who would
be completely useless with a feather duster." Kai
grabbed Pepin's hand. The servant looked at him with loving eyes. He was so hot
and cold, it wasn't even funny. "Now let's grab the robe and put the guards on
high alert, yes?"
"Yes," Pepin said quietly
and let himself dragged away.
***
The robe was still on the
floor, which meant that the assassin hadn't thought of coming back to wipe his
traces. Pepin took the garment and began studying it intently. "As I suspected.
The house of Uxilan." He pointed at a small dark red
crest that would have been easy to miss on that black fabric.
"Who are they?"
"You destroyed them,"
Pepin said. "They were dealing in black magic and tried to keep you from
marching through their territory."
Kai didn't dare to ask
more about that. "Apparently, I didn't do that good of job, if some of them are
still alive and trying to stab me with pointy blades."
"Pointy? Oh, no," Pepin
gasped.
"What? What is it?"
"Let's hurry back to
Conrad," Pepin said quickly. He was the one to grab Kai's hand.
"Now who's in love with
the guy?" Kai tried to joke.
"It is possible that he
was poisoned," came the hasty reply.
"Poisoned? Oh, shit,
that's bad."
They started
running.
***
The physician must have
reached the same conclusion if his drawn face and worried eyes were any
indications.
"How bad is it?" Kai
asked directly.
Conrad had his eyes
closed, and his face had a sickly pallor. He was sweating profusely and looked
gone to the world.
"You did well to freeze
the blood, Your Majesty," the physician replied. "But it is poison, and not
even ice magic will prevent it from spreading."
"Is there an antidote?"
"Yes, there is one, but
not easy to get. Leaves of angelica, hyssop root extract, and --" the physician
hesitated.
"And?" Kai asked, tapping
his foot.
"The tear of a dragon,"
the old man finally answered.
"Are you kidding me? I
mean, is this a joke?"
"No, Sire."
"How am I supposed to
make a dragon cry? Should I tickle him? Have him watch
sappy movies?"
"I do not know, Sire,"
the physician said apologetically.
"All right," Kai said and
began to pace the room. "I was heading over to that dragon cave anyway. I'll
figure out a way. Pepin, get my horse ready, and whatever I need to take with
me to fight dragons."
"Just killing a dragon
won't make him cry," the physician pointed out. "They are creatures made of
fire and anger."
"Well, then I won't kill
him. I'll find a way," Kai said. "The rest of the ingredients, do you have
them?"
"Yes, of course," the old
man replied. "But, Sire, it is a perilous quest. Of what I heard, to touch a
dragon's heart, one needs to reach it. Cold steel and magic won't work. And the
few who ever succeeded if we were to believe the tales, went against dragons
alone."
"Fine by me," Kai said.
"I'm overpowered anyway, and I need to put my skills to the test. So I'll go
face this dragon by myself."
"Don't you dare," Pepin
shouted, ignoring that they had an audience.
Kai frowned. "Don't
lecture me, Pepin. I'm going, and that's final."
"Sire, if you allowed me
a piece of advice," the physician intervened, "allowing this man who until
yesterday used to be your enemy, to perish, wouldn't be seen as an act of
malevolence. You could always get another concubine."
"Talk to the hand," Kai
said and put one palm up in front of the physician.
That made the old man
confused enough to stop making his case against Conrad.
"And make sure to keep
him alive until I get back, or there will be consequences."
What consequences those
would be, he had no idea, but, at the moment, putting the fear of Prince
Sebastian into those old bones looked like the right course of action.
The physician went back
by the patient's side right away. "Of course, Your Majesty," he said grimly.
Kai felt a little bad
about lying to the old man, but dire times called for dire measures. "Pepin,
get guards to the door. They should be here at all times, in case someone tries
something shady."
"Yes, Your
Majesty," Pepin replied as a servant should. "But you're not going alone to the
dragon's cave. I'm coming."
"Why? I don't need a
sandwich while I'm sneaking into that beast's lair." Actually, he might get
hungry, but whatever, he'd just grab some supplies.
Pepin seemed calm and
composed. "You need me."
Of course, he had no idea
about the way to the dragon cave. "Why?" he chose to play his hand. "Do you
happen to know how to get there?"
"Of course I do," Pepin
replied, now full of indignation of being suspected of such lack of knowledge.
"Then you're coming," Kai
said like it was the most natural thing in the world to change his mind at the
drop of a dime.
"I'll make all the
arrangements," Pepin informed him. "We'll be riding west before nightfall."
"Yeah, let's hurry. And
you know what? Grab some sandwiches for the road."
"What are those,
sandwiches?"
"You take a slice of
bread --" Kai began, "oh, shoot, never mind. Some food and water."
"Of course. What kind of
royal servant do you think I am, Your Majesty?" Pepin bristled, now taking
offense over this underhanded attack at his skills.
With Pepin rushing
through the door, Kai started looking around for things he might need in his
quest. His eyes fell on Conrad. Even pale and worn by the poison trying to
wring the life out of him, he was still handsome.
He took a step toward the
bed, then another. He hovered and whispered, "I promise, you'll get better." He
touched Conrad's face with hesitant fingers, taking in the contour of his nose
and lips.
The physician shifted in
his place. "Your Majesty," he cleared his throat, "you might need this." He
offered him an empty vial. "For the dragon's tear."
"Oh, right." Kai shook
his head. A warm and unfamiliar feeling deserted his heart as he pulled his
eyes away from Conrad's face. "Don't worry. I'll make him cry a river."
The physician inspected
him with clever eyes. "They keep gossiping about a change in our cold but just
Prince Sebastian."
Oh, no, Kai groaned
internally, not this again.
"But it was foretold," the old man added, "that love would do that to our
protector."
Love? Even this old dude
thought he was in love with Conrad?
"What change? I have no
idea what you're talking about, man." He used a harsher voice than usual to stop
the physician from talking nonsense.
"Forgive an old fool,
Your Majesty." The physician cowered and looked down.
Well, even to his ears,
he sounded like a total prick. Everyone was right to fear him. And since it
served, he could use that to his advantage. But better not get used to it, Kai
thought. If he were to re-write this story, he would do it his way.
***
Eventually, Tani had settled for walking between him and Milo after
they got off the subway, so now she was chirping happily while swinging their
arms around. Milo appeared to be quite fond of his sister. Could it be that he
intended to marry her once she was of age?
The thought annoyed him. Tani was from a royal house, regardless of her manners that
left plenty to be desired. He was still unsure of Milo's position. He wasn't a
scholar and didn't appear to have the sternness required by a knight's
education. Asking directly would be considered an affront, so it was another
thing he had to figure out on his own.
That wasn't all. Milo
pledged loyalty to him. He belonged to him, Sebastian decided. And as someone
who belonged to him, he should have known better than to try to use the
attention lavished on him to get to the princess.
Tani's
hand was warm, clammy, and slightly unpleasant, but Sebastian held it tightly.
He had never had siblings and not exactly a family either. At least, not one
that resembled what everyone else had. He had been born into his role as the
protector of the realm, and that left no room for unnecessary sentiments.
To begin with, sentiments
were a bother. They fogged one's mind and weakened the spirit. For that reason,
he had to be careful around this family. They appeared to be prone to excessive
emotions. Tani was too loud and joked about
everything, and the mother worried too much about his wellbeing.
At least Milo appeared to
be a lustful creature. Lust, he could understand. He saw its uses, and the
sensation of elation that came with it succeeded where sentiments couldn't. It
cleared the mind. It strengthened the spirit.
"You'll have to walk back
home by yourself today," Milo told Tani.
"Why? What are you two
going to do?"
"Study," Milo said in a
deadpan voice.
"Study, right." Tani snickered.
Sebastian couldn't
imagine what could be so funny about studying that his sister had to neigh like
a horse at every mentioning of it.
"Yes, we will study," he
said sternly.
Tani
disentangled her clammy hand from his and gave him a quick hug. "See you at
home." She dashed to a group of girls her age, dressed in the same fashion. The
yard was full of young men and women between Tani's
age and his and Milo's age. This system of education that involved so many
youngsters flabbergasted Sebastian. He couldn't imagine how someone could learn
anything in that clamor.
Reminding himself that
this strange world needed to have its rules obeyed, he followed Milo inside the
building. They entered a class, and each one took a seat at an individual desk.
Sebastian was all eyes and ears.
***
"Mr. Martin? Mr. Martin?"
Someone shook him. He blinked and looked around.
"Dude, wake up," Milo
whispered.
Sebastian straightened up
and stared around. Then he remembered that he was there to study. The lesson
had been so unexciting, and the teacher's voice so lulling that he had fallen
asleep.
"Mr. Martin!" The
teacher's voice boomed.
She was an elderly woman
dressed in clothes that looked fit as a home for moths.
Finally, he understood
that she was calling for him. Her small owlish eyes were also set on him, which
was another sign. "Yes?" he replied.
"Will you be so kind and
come here?"
He stood up and walked to
the blackboard on which symbols were written. Oh, yes, that was math, and he
had learned new things last night. Apparently, they were a bit more advanced in
the study of that topic in this world.
"Don't just stand there.
Solve the equation." The teacher pointed at the symbols.
Sebastian turned and
looked at them. Yes, he was starting to remember something. "X multiplied by
--" he began.
"Here." The teacher threw
a piece of chalk at him.
Now, he recalled
everything.
"For the record, Mr.
Martin, if you fail to solve this, your grades are going to suffer quite a
bit."
"Suffer? Do you intend to
torture them? How?" he asked, puzzled.
Soft snickers could be
heard from the class.
"Ah, you think yourself
smart, on top of everything."
"I do not think myself
smart. I am smart," Sebastian replied, triggering another bout of laughter from
the class.
The teacher's owlish eyes
grew wide. "Then prove it." She tapped against the table with her knuckles.
He turned toward the
blackboard. Yes, he remembered this quite well. His hand began to dance on the
surface. Math had been one of the many topics he had been taught while growing
up. And he enjoyed a challenge.
The entire class fell
silent, and it appeared that everyone was scribbling on their papers. The
teacher tapped her foot while watching him. She looked a bit like a witch.
Maybe she was there to test him.
Very well. He would not
falter. And it was good that finally, everyone was silent.
He finished and turned
toward the teacher. She was staring at him in disbelief. "Where have you been
all these years of high school, Mr. Martin?"
Oh, it was a question
meant to catch him in a tangle of lies. Maybe she wanted him to deny his true
nature. But he had always faced witches without running or hiding. "I've been
fighting monsters and protecting the land," he said proudly, squaring his
shoulders.
This time, the class
erupted. Sebastian couldn't fathom why they reacted as if he were some jester
brought there for their entertainment.
"Go back to your place!"
The teacher yelled, now red in the face. "And stop being a smartass!"
A smartass? What did his
behind have to do with his intellect?
"Dude," Milo whispered at
him from his right, "what was that all about?"
Maybe his decision to
answer honestly had been wrong. "I just said it in jest," he told Milo, also in
a whisper.
"In what?" Milo leaned
toward him more, unable to hear him over the commotion in the room.
"Mr. Bennett, stop
talking to Mr. Martin! Quiet, everyone!"
She slammed her palm
against her desk. Everyone fell silent.
So, Sebastian found
himself saying out loud, "What a witch!", rightfully
impressed by her ability to steal everyone's ability to speak.
"That's it, Mr. Martin! I
don't care that you appear to have turned into a math genius overnight! You're
going straight to detention after classes!"
"Am I to be jailed?" he
asked, utterly flabbergasted and forgetting that he was speaking in a too
formal manner for a high school student. "What for?"
"For being a smartass!"
the teacher yelled again.
Sebastian fell quiet. He
didn't have his magic, and this witch was sending him to jail. For the moment,
he would accept his fate only so he could have a deeper understanding of what
the curse wanted from him.
***
The ring of the bell
announced the recess, and the witch left the room. Sebastian had a mind to go
after her and provoke her, but he felt that he was too weak in this world to
emerge victorious from such an encounter.
"Dude," Milo started.
"What the hell, man? You don't just provoke Mrs. Marwin
like that."
If only he had realized
that before ending up in jail. "Is she going to send guards after me?"
Any moment now, that
would happen.
"No, man." Milo
snickered. "But it's a bummer that you got detention. You won't see me
practice."
"Or sweaty, and then
naked, taking a shower," Sebastian said matter-of-factly.
Milo blushed and punched
him in the shoulder. "Dude, what the hell?" he mumbled.
Someone brushed his hair
forcefully from the back to his face. Sebastian turned, in righteous outrage,
only to be met by an ugly, pig-like face. The young man was large and smelled
of grease. He pushed himself into Sebastian's face. "Am I to be jailed?" he
mocked in a high-pitched voice.
"I beg your pardon?"
Sebastian ran his hands through his hair.
"Chet, cut it out, man,"
Milo intervened.
"What?" the pig-faced
young man asked. "I didn't do anything. Stop protecting your girlfriend so
much. What, he can't defend himself or something?"
Sebastian noted the
presence of two other boys, relatively as ugly as Chet, right behind him. He
was about to open his mouth when Milo spoke again. "Chet, beat it. Or we'll
have a problem."
"All right, man.
Whatever." Chet brushed by him on his way out, followed closely by the other
two. "Fucking nerd," he whispered.
What was that, a nerd? He
had so many other questions to ask his phone. He took it out of his pocket,
decided to learn the meaning of that word right away.
"Don't mind them," Milo
said. "They're just douchebags."
"Who is your girlfriend?"
Sebastian asked while typing quickly on his phone.
"Are you kidding me now?
They've been teasing us since forever."
"I'm not kidding,"
Sebastian protested.
"You're such a weirdo,"
Milo said with affection, "but you're my weirdo." He took him by the shoulders.
"Come, let's stretch our legs a little."
***
During the last period,
Sebastian began to understand that he appeared to be doing a lot better in
school than Kai Martin had used to. However, the curse seemed to involve
graduating, and there was only one way to secure that, according to the
teachers: study hard.
He was overly conscious
of the curious eyes staring at him from all directions as the French words
rolled off his tongue with ease. This teacher, unlike Mrs. Marwin,
was much younger and had a pleasant demeanor. She appeared engrossed with him
as they conversed, and for the entire duration of the class, she didn't care
about the other students. Maybe she was a good witch, and it would be advisable
to have her on his side.
The dreaded time had come
to be escorted to his cell. Milo had kindly informed him that he would only be
in detention for two hours, so it wasn't that hard a sentence. Of course,
Sebastian had feared to ask him if any torture was involved, but he was bracing
himself for the worse. As an enforcer of the law in his position as a prince,
he understood that obeying the law was essential for his survival in this
world.
He walked into a
classroom not much different from the one he had just been in. Other boys and
girls were there, apparently for the same reason. So far, this detention didn't
appear so bad.
He took place at a desk
and waited patiently for the jailer to speak. The jailer was a man in his
forties dressed up quite unconventionally. From what Sebastian could gather, he
looked like a Physical Education teacher.
"All right," he said.
"Everyone, surrender your phones."
Sebastian stood there, in
stunned silence, as the others shuffled around and placed their phones inside a
crate. No, that couldn't be. "That's not fair," he said out loud. "My life
depends on it!"
"Martin, it's not often
that I see your face in here. But now, please, hurry up, before you make your
situation worse."
Worse? Sebastian didn't
want to know what that meant. What could be worse than having his phone taken
away from him?
With wooden moves, he
walked over to the teacher's desk and gave up his phone. He dragged his feet
back. What would he do without his phone? It was his only way of understanding
this strange world!
He sank into his seat and
covered his face with his hands. He would have to find another way.
What a cruel and unusual
punishment!
TBC
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