Date: Sun, 05 Oct 2003 00:19:25 -0700 From: bawdy pen Subject: DISPOSAL THINGAMABOB (scat ws) DISPOSAL THINGAMABOB by bawdypen "Uh, what are you doing in here, sir?" He looked around. "N-nothing, officer!" the guy stammered. "Nothing? Why were you...looking under the stall?" He glanced down and jerked his head as if in mimicry. "Um, looking for a f-friend I thought was in here." "I see. So, why were you making all those sniffing noises. You know your friend by his smell?" "Uh, I just have a little cold, that's all." "Unh hunh. Sure you weren't down there trying to sniff up some smells while the gentleman in there takes a shit?" "Certainly not! How could you suggest such a thing?!" "Well, you're in here an awful lot, sir. We've been keeping an eye on this restroom, and frankly, no one could shit or piss that often...nor have that many friends. We've also had complaints about some fellow peeking up the partitions while guys do their business--obviously sniffing around. One man complained that the fellow offered his tongue as a replacement for toilet paper. Would you be that person, sir?" The fellow in the stall came out, buckling up. He'd heard the conversation and nodded to the guard and glared at the fellow weirdly. "Officer, do I look like someone who would do such filthy things as that? My goodness!" he cried, after the man left. "Well, I don't know, sir. Obviously, that was not your friend, and that leaves the place empty. Except for you...and one patrol officer that needs to shit real badly. I must have a three-day-old turd up there. My, I certainly hope there's enough paper in the cubicle. I can't imagine what I'd use as a substi- tute, and my partner won't be back for an hour. Oh, well, I guess I'll just have to chance it. If you'll excuse me, I'll take the cubicle on the end." "C-certainly." "Oh, you might do me a favor. As long as you're here, would you mind taking the cubicle next to me...just in case that fellow comes along and tries to bother me? I'm going to be a while with what I have up there, and I'd really appreciate it if you'd keep an eye out for me. You know, check underneath once in a while to make sure no one else is looking up at me. Unless the smell would bother you too much?" "No, no! That wouldn't bother me in the least! Believe me, I'll keep a good eye out!" "Thank you, sir." The officer went into the cubicle and audibly voiced his complaint that indeed, there was no paper left. He sighed, and sat to do his duty. "I'm sure something will turn up!" The man went into the next cubicle and waited to hear the sounds of the cop attempting to shit. Grunts and groans and then a voice speaking to itself. "Did I do something? I'm not sure. Perhaps I should check and see." Peeking underneath, the man saw the guard's naked ass squat down right next to him as the guy was seemingly checking the bowl. "Nope, I guess I didn't. Dammit! My hole is so stuffed up. I wish I had something to loosen it a bit. Perhaps if I just squat like this for a while, the position might help." Tentatively, but guessing he'd not be wrong, the guy slid his hand under the man's large, smooth buttocks and felt for his asshole. It was large and puffy and he ran his finger over it in circles. "Hmmm, yes. Perhaps this might help somewhat." Not being rebuffed, the man put his other hand down there and traded fingers so he could smell the one he'd first used. It was a game, and he played it. Louder than usual, he sniffed his finger, gasping in obvious delight at what he was smelling. "Oooh! Yeah! That smells incredible!" he spoke to himself, as if alone. Again he traded fingers, after rubbing a bit harder and more thoroughly. "Aw, fuck! I could really lick something like that!" A glangle of keys hit the floor. "Damn! My keys fell off. Sure wish I'd have locked that door so I'd be alone." Quick as a flash, the man grabbed up the keys and rushed out to lock the door. Now, all was safe and the game could be played. "I don't know what it is. I squat down like this and still my ass doesn't want to give. I know I've got an absolutely huge turd up there, but how to get it out? Like it needs something slippery to help it." The keys came sliding into the cubicle...along with the man's head as he squirmed himself under the cop's butt on his back. He stared up at the huge, white globes and nearly hairless, large asshole. The smell was intense now, and his sniffing reverberated throughout the room. "Yeah, maybe something wet and probing." He could have sniffed all day at that luscious butthole, but he knew the officer wanted more. He stuck out his tongue and fluttered it around the smelly opening. "Yeah, this seems to be a good position. Perhaps I should squat down a little more so my turd has a clear angle." "Aw, fuck! What a hot suckable ass!" The man drove his tongue up into the cop's rectum and licked it out! The damned thing gaped immediately and he was able to tongue out the insides quite freely. "Hmmm, that seems to be helping. Maybe if I just stay like this for awhile my turd will just shoot right out onto the floor. Good thing I'm alone. That way I can pick it up and put it away without being seen. If it's still there, of course. And then, the problem of wiping my asshole will still be with me. Whatever will I do?" Between lickings, the man answered the questions with quiet gasps. "I'm a cleaner! I'm a good cleaner!" He sucked the gaping hole. "Hope I'm not holding anybody up. I understand the cleaners come in during the day. Course that's not quite what I need right now. I need a disposal. Something that will snatch my turd right up and devour it and wash out my dirty crack afterward." "Oooh, I'm an automatic disposal service. A little slow, perhaps, but all shit deposited is vacuumed away. And all utensils swabbed spic 'n span! I also have an optional cum receptacle!" "Slow is okay, and I guess that's how it's gonna be. I'm certainly in no rush. Just as long as I can get rid of it ALL!" The man noisily sucked out the guard's asshole for a good ten minutes before he finally felt the lips expand and started tasting the fellow's turd. That made him dig his tongue in further and lick around in a larger circle...licking the inside walls...circling his shit! "Yes, this may work out quite fine. I feel that filthy thing about to begin its departure. God help anyone within range when I take a big shit! I might have a nice, smooth butt that chicks find rather tasty to lick on, but when I take a shit... jeez! Fat, black, and a smell that would keel over a camel! I can't even stand it myself. I guess the only living thing in the universe that could stand it would be a dirty fag that lives to eat hot shit! One of them might be able to handle it." "Yes, yes, yes!" the man gasped, "dirty fag disposal!" "Well, I guess there's no stopping it now. Might be a slow process, but I'm sure every scrap will soon be eliminated from my rectum." The powerful cop grasped the toilet and held himself in the position for about five minutes, slowly easing out more of his tremendously thick, sturdy turd as it was sucked and chewed by the man beneath him! The horrendous stench was no exaggeration, but it was thoroughly enjoyed by both of them. The man could hear the guard sniffing just as voraciously as he was! Every scrap was disposed of, and then he tongued out the gaping shithole and washed it completely. "Ah, that was a fine shitting." "Delicious! Tough, yet creamy, with an incomparable fragrance. You need a personal disposer at your beck and call!" "Perhaps I'll come back every Wednesday at 2:30. Whoops, now I really gotta piss. Oh, well, guess if I can shit on the floor, I'd might as well piss on the floor. Hope that disposal is still working." "So thirsty! Yeah, this machine takes liquid!" He pulled the lowered cock tip to his mouth and sucked away on the fat knob. Soon a veritable deluge burst from the hose and went straight to his stomach. He layed there, holding his breath-- being used as the toilet he was! "Why, I haven't come yet today. Wonder if this thingamabob has a suction cap on it. Be great to blow a wad this way. Hmmm. Seems to be working at that. Hope it's fast. Maybe I'll just lick this toilet seat while it's working on me." The cop didn't lick the toilet seat, of course, but it sure put a vivid image into the cocksucker's mind. Those powerful hips were soon bouncing up and down...fucking him in the mouth. Finding the angle all wrong, the guard pulled out and turned, pulling the man inside and to his knees. "Doesn't fit right. Maybe if I resettle this gizmo I can get my prick in deeper." Sure enough, he was now able to shove all of his nine fat inches straight down the cocksucker's throat as he humped his ass and made sexy, groaning noises. "Damned disposal cleaned me up good, but it didn't seem to know how to clean itself up. Still got caked shit around the rim. Oh, well, guess my cock won't mind much." In fact, it turned the patrolman on more to see the man's lips with a ring of his own shit around them. After all, that was a hefty turd he'd eaten, and it wasn't as if he'd had time to take a breath, much less lick himself up. Not a selfish bastard--and even though he was brutally fucking the man's throat--when it came time to shoot, he lifted up and poured his load directly onto the man's tongue and let the deluge dribble down his throat. Anybody that ate his shit that way would certainly want the full taste of his ballscum! "Yessiree, think I'll be back next Wednesday. Gee, my partner oughta be back by now. I wonder if he needs to take a big shit. I should tell him about the disposal, I suppose." "Yes, yes, yes!" "Yeah, but I wonder if this machine handles large-cocked Negroes." "Yes, yes, oh yes!" Comments appreciated...please mention story name. bawdypen@hotmail.com