Saturday, Christmas Eve, was a
busy one, and we really didn't have much time to think
about our budding relationship or the sexual aspect of it.
First was breakfast, and practically as soon as we sat
down, Mr. Perkins began to outline their plans to help Sid
and his family.
Of
course Mike and I were just as excited as the grownups,
and we couldn't wait to see the look on Sid's face when we
laid the good news on him and his family. Then I
remembered what mom had said about the family coming into
her store today to pick out new clothes and I mentioned
that to the Perkins.
"Yes,
dear...in fact...we're all going to go to your mom's store
at 10 o'clock to meet the family and invite them to stay
in our garage apartment," Mrs. Perkins said.
"Cool,
what about my brothers, are they coming too?" I asked
curiously.
"Yes,
Mrs. Turner is going to drop them off on her way to do
some grocery shopping."
Mrs.
Turner was our next door neighbor, and sometimes, like
today, when I wasn't around, she watched my brothers, and
even though mom tried to pay her, she refused to take any
money. She said ever since her kids had grown up and moved
away, that she missed being needed, and that taking care
of my brothers was a pleasure. A pleasure? I thought, boy
she must really be lonely, cause sometimes they were a
royal pain in the behind.
Mike
and I hung out in his room after breakfast, but soon it
was time to go, and we loaded up in Mr. Perkins Chevy and
off we went.
Downtown
was sparkling and festive looking in the sunlight, and
people were coming and going from every store, making
those last minute purchases or just window shopping. As we
pulled up in front of the store, I noticed an old beat up
Ford parked a few spaces away, and suddenly the back door
opened and out popped Sid. His family soon followed, and
for the first time we got a good look at his mom and dad,
as well as his younger brother, Paul.
Paul
was 9 and in third grade, right between my brothers, so
they really didn't know him all that well, though they
said they'd seen him around school and on the playground.
Like Sid, Paul was small and slender, with the same color
hair and eyes, but I would find out he wasn't nearly as
shy as his older brother.
As
we met on the sidewalk, Mr. Perkins introduced us and the
adults shook hands while us kids sort of moved aside and
waited for them to finish. I noted that Sid's dad was
skinny like him, but that his mom was a bit heavier, not
fat mind you, but certainly not skinny. She was wearing a
plain cotton dress, low heels, and a light sweater, while
her husband wore Khakis and a flannel shirt, no jacket.
The boys were dressed in faded jeans and pullovers, with
heavy winter coats that looked worn, but still in pretty
good shape. I guessed this was the clothes the Salvation
Army had given them, but soon they'd be getting new
things, and for that I was glad.
Paul
seemed to take to Mike and me right away, and didn't
appear to have any of the misgivings Sid had when we'd
first introduced ourselves at the lunch table. In fact,
Paul chattered on like we were old friends, and when at
last we started for the door, he took both mine and Mike's
hands and led us inside as if he owned the place.
Mom
met us at the door, and I wasn't surprised to see the
store was packed with shoppers, the clerks running around
helping two or three people at once. I waved to the
ladies' who worked there and the Perkins exchanged hellos
and seemed to know each of them by name as well.
Mom
took charge then and for the next hour or so, she helped
Sid, Paul, and their dad pick out clothes. Sid's mom
helped as well, ushering the boys to the fitting room to
try on their new things. Eventually they had all the items
rang up, bagged, and mom took Sid's mom to the ladies'
side of the store to help her pick out her clothes.
While
the women were busy, us boys headed to the pop machine at
the back of the store by the office and Mike and I
bought drinks for us and the two brothers. We'd just made
our selections when my two younger brothers came flying
through the archway from the mens' side of the store, and
they screeched to a stop before us.
I
was about to offer to buy them a can of pop when Billy
pulled out two quarters and handed one to Danny and soon
they too had a can of pop. It was so crowded in the store
that we finally decided to wait out front, and as we stood
there drinking our pop, we all got better acquainted.
Paul
and Danny seemed to hit it off right away, and I figured
with Paul living so close now that maybe the two could
become friends. Maybe even as close as Mike and I. Then I
blushed thinking about how close Mike and I had become,
and I wondered, did boys as young as Danny even think
about that kind of stuff? Then I remembered my talk with
Billy and I blushed. I guessed all boys did it, and my
brothers were doing what came natural, just as I had.
I'd
discovered rather early that rubbing myself down there
felt good, but I'd been about 11 before I'd learned to do
it properly and to get that wonderful feeling at the end.
Looking back, I felt kind of silly for not having figured
it out sooner, and a little cheated knowing I could have
been having those shudders all along. Then I had this
sudden thought. If I'd had an older brother would he have
taught me how to do it right from the start and saved me
all that lost time? Then that caused another thought to
come into my head. As the older brother was it my
responsibility to make sure my brothers learned how to do
it right? But from my talk with Billy it seemed they
didn't need my help after all. I was saved any further
thought on the subject as Mike suddenly began explaining
to Sid and Paul about the garage apartment.
"You
mean we're going to be living right over you guys?" Sid
said sounding unsure.
"Yeah,
in fact, you'll be right on the other side of my bedroom
wall," Mike chuckled, "so...don't be noisy."
"We
won't," Sid said, sounding fearful as he shook his head.
"I'm
kidding, dork," Mike said cuffing Sid playfully.
At
first I was worried Sid might take offense at the name and
Mike cuffing him, but I think it had the opposite effect.
By treating Sid as he would any friend, Mike had convinced
him, at least for the moment, that he was accepted as one
of the pack.
The
rest of our visit was pleasant as we talked about school,
sports, and other subjects of interest to boys. I was
reluctant to bring up Christmas after what Sid had said
about them not going in for the Holiday, but Mike didn't
have any such misgivings and eventually breached the
subject.
Paul
seemed especially excited when he learned that the church
was providing presents for the family and chattered on and
on, speculating about what toy he might get. Sid seemed
more reserved, but I could tell he too was a bit excited,
and I'd begun to wonder if their trailer burning wasn't as
bad a thing as we'd first thought. Because of that tragedy
the family was finally getting some help, and this
Christmas they would have something to celebrate.
Eventually,
the adults reappeared and Mr. and Mrs. Perkins helped
Sid's family load up their purchases in the old Ford. Mom
came out long enough to tell us all goodbye and to say she
would be home early since the store was closing at 3
o'clock today. That was welcome news for us boys as we
really hadn't had much time with mom since the season had
begun. Tonight, as was our tradition, we'd open one gift
each, and I knew just the one I wanted mom to have.
Since
Mrs. Turner had dropped my brothers off at the store, then
gone on grocery shopping, so Billy and Danny would be
riding back with us. The plan was to drop us off at my
house, but Mike suggested that we go back to his
house and his folks bring us home later, and his folks
agreed easily.
Sid's
family was following along behind us, and when we got to
Mike's house they pulled up to the curb and piled out. I
could tell from the way they were looking at Mike's house
that they were a bit intimidated, just as I'd been the
first time I'd seen it, but they would soon get over that,
just as I had. The Perkins were just such down to earth
and friendly people that you soon forgot about the house,
or the cars, and all the material things.
Mike
had learned from his folks and he never made me feel bad
about how little I had, or how much he had, in fact, I
think if I'd have let him, he'd have given half his stuff
to me. But the most valuable gift Mike ever gave me was
his friendship, and now it seemed, his love as well.
Us
boys tried to stay out of the way as Mr. Perkins led the
family up the stairway to the garage apartment. The
stairway was enclosed and located at the far left side of
the garage. Entry to the stairway was through an unlocked
door, but of course the door at the top had both a lock on
the knob as well as a deadbolt.
The
apartment had an open floor plan, the only enclosed spaces
being the small bathroom and the closet, both located at
the backside of the apartment. A huge bed filled one
corner, while a couch, chair, end table, and coffee table
occupied the other end. Next to the bathroom, also on the
back wall, was a small kitchen with fridge, a small gas
stove, and raised counter with two stools in front of it.
The place had actually been designed for a single occupant
or a couple, but with the addition of another bed for the
boys it would do for now.
That
other bed would have to wait however, because the
furniture company couldn't deliver it till Monday.
Meanwhile, it was decided that Paul would sleep on the
couch, and Sid would bunk with Mike. I didn't know how I
felt about that at first, but we'd already discussed how
we felt about messing with other boys and I trusted Mike,
so I wasn't about to bring it up again.
While
my brothers hung out with Sid and Paul, Mike and I made
our escape and went to his room. The first thing Mike did
when we got there was to put his ear to the wall that
separated his room from the garage apartment and listen.
"Nothing,"
he said at last, "dad said the builders made this wall
thicker, like six inches instead of 4, or whatever, so I
guess I don't have to worry about noise."
"Yeah,"
I said distractedly, still thinking about the fact that
Sid would be sleeping with Mike the next two nights.
"What?"
Mike said, reading me perfectly, "you're not worried about
me and Sid sleeping together, are you?"
"Nah,"
I said quickly, "I trust you."
"But
you don't trust him, right?" he chuckled, "man, we don't
even know if he likes that stuff. Besides, I already told
you, you're the only one I wanna do that stuff with."
"Yeah,
me too," I said perking up, "too bad we don't have time or
privacy..."
"Hmm...what
about the bathroom? I really need to pee," he said with a
wink.
"Yeah,
me too," I said, my dick already starting to get hard.
So,
minutes later Mike and I stood side by side at the toilet
and jerked each other to a spectacular orgasm. We splashed
our young seed into the toilet, and though we'd have liked
to done more, that was enough to get us through till our
next sleepover.
All
too soon it was time for me and my brothers to go, and
Mike rode up front with his mom while the three of us took
the backseat. Mike sat facing us most of the time and we
had a good time laughing and joking around all the way
there.
We'd
exchanged gifts the night before when I'd come over, but
we weren't going to unwrap them till Christmas morning.
I'd gotten Mike a new record album, but mom had wrapped it
in a bigger box so he couldn't tell what it was. The gift
Mike gave to me was medium sized and kind of heavy, but
then for all I knew Mike might have packed a few rocks in
there just to give it some weight. He loved to play tricks
on me, and I wouldn't put that, or anything for that
matter past him.
At
our house, Mike got out and walked us to the door, and
while my brothers ran on inside, we lingered for a few
minutes.
"Well,
Merry Christmas," Mike said, looking at me with those
amazing eyes and that smile that melted my heart every
single time.
"Merry
Christmas...I...I love you," I said, feeling a little
teary-eyed, "you're the best Christmas present I've ever
gotten," I said sincerely.
"Oh
wow, I'll wear a bow next time you're over," he joked,
then turning serious, he added, "I feel the same way, and
the weird thing is, we had each other already, we just
didn't know how to say what we felt."
"Yeah,
well...now we do, so let's not let things go back to how
they were."
"We
won't, things can never be the same now...cause,
well...cause...now we love each other, and...and now we
can come," he said grinning, "we made that happen cause
we're so good together."
"Yeah,
I think so too," I said happily.
A
soft tap on the horn said Mike's mom was tired of waiting,
but before Mike headed her way he had one more thing to
say, "Don't worry about Sid and me. I only love you, and I
only want to do that stuff with you." Then before I knew
what was happening, Mike threw himself at me and gave me a
ferocious hug. Then he pulled away and bounded to the car,
leaving me to stare after him, my cheeks warm from
embarrassment, my heart aglow with love.
I
somehow managed to pull myself together and I waved as
they drove out of sight, then finally went inside to find
my brothers parked in front of the TV. They barely looked
up as I entered, and I drifted off to my room, floating on
air as lovers often do.
Mom
was home by 3:30 and she suggested since she'd be cooking
tomorrow that we eat out Christmas Eve. There were a
number of restaurants open that night and we wound up with
hamburgers and fries at a little drive-in we especially
liked.
Afterwards,
mom drove us around to look at the Christmas lights and we
didn't get home till almost nine. The first thing my
brothers did when we got home was to run to the tree,
waiting for mom and me to get inside so we could open a
gift.
I
gave mom her gift, neatly wrapped with the help of Mike's
mom, and she pointed out the gifts she wanted us boys to
open. Unlike some families, our folks never waited till
Christmas Eve while we boys were asleep to put the gifts
under the tree. Though the gifts still said 'From Santa',
we'd never really wondered why Santa kept leaving gifts
the whole season instead of waiting till Christmas Eve. Of
course, once I figured out that Santa wasn't real, and
that our folks bought the gifts, it all made sense. And
now my brothers knew the truth as well, but it sure didn't
dull their joy or anticipation.
Mom's
gift was a pair of fluffy house slippers from all three of
us boys, and she made a big fuss over them and insisted on
wearing them the rest of the evening. For Danny, a dump
truck, and for Billy, a bow and arrow set with suction cup
tips. My gift was a new View-Master to replace the one I'd
accidentally squashed when I fell on it. I already had a
bunch of reels, but usually I just checked them out at the
library.
"Oh
mom, thanks," I said giving her a hug, "I've really missed
having one of these."
"Well,
I enjoy looking at the reels as well," she said, "so, may
I borrow it sometime?"
"Sure
mom, so can Billy and Danny, as long as you guys don't sit
on it," I joked, and we all laughed.
It
was bedtime by then, and I could tell mom was tired. She'd
worked hard the whole season, and even on Christmas day
she'd have to cook dinner for us, but I vowed to help her
as much as I could. I knew from past years that she'd be
up early, putting the turkey in to bake, but she'd
actually been busy all week, baking pies and cookies, and
making fudge, which we had a bounty of.
Mike's
family had invited Sid and his family for Christmas
dinner, but I knew there would be plenty because Mrs.
Perkins was an excellent cook and knew how to feed a bunch
of hungry people, especially boys. I was looking forward
to dinner with mom and my brothers, but it would have been
nice if both our families could have had dinner together.
Maybe next year, I thought, and made a mental note to
suggest that next Christmas.
I
guess I was more tired than I thought, and after a quick
shower I was under the covers and asleep in no time.
However, no Sugar Plum Fairies danced in my head, nor did
the clack clack clack of reindeer hooves invade my dreams.
No, I dreamed of Mike and me snuggled up in a warm bed,
holding one another and sharing our love, and I slept
better than I had in a long time.
Christmas
morning dawned bright and early, with no snow in sight.
In fact, the weather forecast called for sunny skies and
above average temps, perfect for kids to spend the day
outside enjoying their new toys. I wondered how many
kids were getting bikes, or scooters, or roller skates,
and I smiled. Boy, they'd sure be happy today.
I
lay in my bed staring at the ceiling for a long time
before I heard noises in the hallway, and minutes later
my two brothers came bursting in my room without so much
as a knock.
"Hey!"
I protested, but I knew in their excited state they'd
given no thought to my privacy or the rules.
"Sorry,
but...it's Christmas, brother," Billy said excitedly,
"Come on slow poke and let's open presents!"
"Give
me a minute, need to pee," I said throwing back the
covers, boldly revealing my morning wood.
Danny
giggled and Billy just stared, but nothing was said, and
they soon bounded out the door. After relieving my
aching bladder, I washed up, splashing cold water on my
face, and went back to my room to get dressed. By the
time I'd joined my brothers in the living room, mom was
up and had a cup of coffee in her hand and a cup of hot
cocoa for me. Two cups of hot cocoa sat on the coffee
table, abandoned by my brothers for the moment as they
waited impatiently for the passing out of the presents.
"Let's
see," mom said, "last year it was Billy who passed out
the presents, and if I remember correctly...it should be
Danny's turn this year."
"Yaaay!"
Danny said as he snatched up a package and carefully
perused the to and from card, "Umm...to momma," he said
jumping up and handing the gift to mom.
"One
for me please," Billy said impatiently.
"Hold
on, hold on," Danny said, "you'll get yours when I get
to it," he said, causing me and mom to laugh and Billy
to fume.
"All
right, all right, but hurry, I ain't gettin' no younger
you know," Billy said, causing mom and I to laugh again.
"This
one is for...ta ta, Tony," he said handing a small
brightly wrapped package to me. To save him time, Billy
and I had moved closer so he would only have to get up
to deliver mom's packages.
"Isn't
there anything for me?" Billy groused.
"Dis
one is for you, grumpy pants," Danny said shoving a big
package Billy's way, and for the moment he was silent as
he began to rip into it.
Danny
liked to take his time, making a big show of reading
each name tag and delivering each gift, perhaps enjoying
himself as much as Santa might, if Santa was real of
course. I'd yet to open any of mine, but Billy made
quick work of each of his as they were passed his way,
and mom had opened a couple of hers, though she didn't
seem in any hurry to open the rest.
Finally,
all the gifts were passed out, and Danny sat before his
own stack and began to rip into them, "Oh, neato, more
Hot Wheels," he said opening a box with several of the
small collectables inside.
"Thanks
mom," I said opening one of mine which contained one of
the plastic models I'd scoped out at McCrory's, "how did
you know?"
"A
little elf told me," she chuckled, and I took that to
mean one of my brothers, or perhaps Mike had filled her
in on my wishes.
Despite
my fears that this Christmas might not be as good as
past Christmases, I was impressed at the number of gifts
each of us boys got, and in a way I felt kind of guilty.
I knew there were other kids, like Sid and Paul, whose
families could barely afford a place to live and food on
the table, and I felt myself very rich indeed compared
to them. I was glad we were able to help them, even if
my only contribution was to offer my friendship to Sid.
I guessed I could take partial credit for what mom had
done for them, perhaps even some credit for what Mike's
folks had done, for I'd certainly encouraged them to do
something. But what I really wanted was to give them
something of me, something that was mine, and suddenly I
had a wonderful idea.
"Mom,
can I talk to you alone for a minute?"
"Well,
sure honey," mom said glancing at my brothers, who were
busy playing with their new toys.
I
led her to the kitchen and she looked at me expectantly.
At first I didn't know how to begin, then I took a deep
breath and started and didn't stop till I had it all
out.
"What
I was wondering was: would it be okay if I wrapped up a
couple of the things I got for Christmas and gave them
to Sid and Paul? I mean, I know they got gifts from the
church and all, but I really want to give them
something...something from me."
Was
that a tear I saw trickle down mom's cheek? Dang, I'd
done it again, made my momma cry.
"Oh
honey, that is so sweet of you. Are you sure about
this?"
"Yes,
ma'am," I said, my lip quivering as I wiped a tear from
my own eye.
"Then
I think it's a wonderful idea. You're a very sweet and
thoughtful young man," she said hugging me close, "Have
you decided which things you'd like to give them?"
When
we returned to the living room, Billy was the first to
ask what was going on, and despite my being a bit
embarrassed about it, mom proudly told my brothers what
I'd decided.
"That
sounds fun," Danny said, perking up, "hey, what if I
gave Paul some of my new Hot Wheels?"
Well,
Billy wasn't about to be outdone by his little brother,
so a hand held game went to Sid from my middle brother.
Mom helped us wrap the gifts and between us we had two
for each boy, and mom said she had something for the
family, and produced a nice fruit basket that someone at
work had given her. I don't know if we invented
re-gifting, but that was certainly what we did that
year, but when we saw the happy looks on Sid and his
family's faces we knew we'd done the right thing.
That
Christmas was special in many ways, I'd discovered the
real meaning of Christmas and I'd found my first love.
Maybe it wouldn't last, maybe it was just a passing
crush, but it sure felt real, and exciting, and I was
eager to see how it all played out.
As
I sat there at the dinner table that day, gazing at my
brothers and my mom, I realized just how important my
family was to me, and I vowed to never take them for
granted again. Of course, I considered Mike and his mom
and dad a part of my family too, and now it seemed we
could add Sid's family as well.
I
don't think I'd ever felt as happy as I did that day,
devouring turkey and all the trimmings, joking with my
brothers and making my mom laugh. It was good to see her
laugh. She worked so hard, and ever since dad had died
she'd been both mother and father to us boys. I guess I
always knew my mom was someone special, but that
Christmas I finally saw just how special she was. She'd
not only kept a roof over our heads, and provided food
and clothing for us, she had given us hope for the
future, and we were looking forward to what lay ahead.
After
dinner, my brothers and I helped mom clean up, without
being asked, and afterwards we set about sorting out the
presents for Sid and his family and re-wrapped them. Mom
called first to make sure it was okay to come over, and
as expected we were welcomed with open arms.
Sid
and Paul seemed surprised to see us, and when we handed
them their gifts, the look on their faces were one of
amazement and joy.
"We
didn't get you nothin'," Sid said looking embarrassed
now.
"Oh,
that's okay. This was just sort of a last minute thing,"
I said smiling, "go ahead, open em."
Both
Sid and Paul were very grateful for their gifts and
genuinely touched by our kindness, which made me blush.
It was no big deal, I thought, but I guess to them it
was about the most wonderful thing anyone could have
done for them.
After
they'd opened their presents, us boys went into Mike's
backyard where we played Frisbee and hung out. As it had
been most of the season, it was warm and sunny that day,
and before long we had shed our coats and were wrestling
around on the grass.
Once
again Mike pinned me, his face only inches from mine as
he grinned maniacally, and in a voice so low only I
could hear him, he said, "Merry Christmas, boyfriend. I
love you."
"I
love you too," I managed to reply, and though I had the
most overpowering urge to kiss him, instead I did what
boys do, I rolled him off of me and pinned him before he
could react.
"Yaaay!
Tony won," my youngest brother said excitedly.
"We're
both winners," Mike said, giving me a smile, " in fact,
all of us are."
Epilogue:
Sid and his family lived above
Mike's garage for the next six months, but eventually
they'd saved enough money to move into a small, but
well kept house in the older part of town. Sid's dad
went to work at the cement plant, the same place my
dad had worked, and was doing quite well there. Sid's
mom worked part-time for my mom and the discount she
got on their clothing and such were an added bonus.
Speaking of mom, she continued
to do well as manager of her store, and that following
year her bonus was almost a thousand dollars. Her
bosses couldn't have been happier with her, and she
managed that store till she retired, many years later.
You're probably wondering what
happened with me and Mike. Well, despite my fears that
our love was just a passing fancy, we are still
together today. We had our difficulties, especially
when we entered high school, but in the end our love
always won out, and even when Mike went off to college
we managed to maintain our relationship. In fact, I
actually moved to the same city where he was attending
school and we shared an apartment. I took some courses
at the local Junior College and worked part time at a
record store, but Mike's folks paid for most of our
expenses.
Did they suspect that Mike and I
were more than just friends? I don't see how anyone
who knew us couldn't look at us and know we shared
something special. I think my mom had us figured out
from the start, but it was several years later before
she finally confronted us. She wasn't mad or upset
however, in fact, she said we made a nice couple, but
she warned us that the world wasn't as accepting as
she was, and that we needed to be careful. We ended up
exchanging hugs and shed a few tears that day, but now
that we had my mom on our side it seemed as if our
love grew even stronger.
It was not until our senior year
that my brothers finally figured us out, but just as
mom had done, they accepted us as we were, though they
never passed up an opportunity to tease or embarrass
us. I suspected the two had done some exploring of
their own, but I never confronted them. If I hadn't
had Mike to satisfy my urges, who knows what might
have happened with me and Billy.
Today, Mike and I live in the
same small town we grew up in. Mike is president of
the same bank his father once managed, and I am the
owner operator of 'Simply Male', a men and boys
clothing store. I think one reason I went into retail
was because I could see how much my mom enjoyed her
job, and I have never regretted my decision.
My brothers went on to college
and Billy lives in Tulsa, is married and has two boys,
my nephews. Danny moved back home with mom, and when
mom retired Danny took over as manager of the store
that had saved our family. I guess you could say Danny
and I are competitors, but I carry mostly upscale high
fashion items, while his store has more modest
offerings.
Sadly, mom passed away about two
years ago, and Danny now lives in our old house,
alone. Often I've wondered if Danny might be more like
me, that is gay, but he did date some girls back in
high school, though nothing ever became of it. I
suppose it's possible that he just likes his solitude,
but Mike and I have him over often, and he always
seems to enjoy our company.
As for Mike's folks, they're
still alive and kicking, living in a somewhat smaller
house now and enjoying retirement. Though they have
never confronted us about our living arrangements or
our relationship, I am sure they know we are more than
just friends by now. Maybe it's one of those, 'don't
ask, don't tell' kind of things, but it would be nice
to have their approval.
And we may have to press the
issue soon, because now that marriage equality is a
thing, Mike and I are considering getting married.
Yeah, my only regret is that my mom won't be there to
see us walk down the aisle. She was always our
staunchest supporter and we both miss her more than
words can say.
So, mom, wherever you are. We
love you, we miss you, and we're looking forward to
seeing you again someday.