Date: Wed, 25 Jun 2008 18:50:46 -0700 (PDT) From: Blake sanders Subject: "Coming Out Within The Hurt" Chapter 3 BB AUTHOR'S NOTE: THIS IS A 100% FAKE, MADE UP, AND COMPLETELY UNTURE STORY. THERE IS NO SEX IN THIS STORY IF THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE LOOKING FOR, FIND SOMETHING ELSE TO READ. IT DOSE HAVE GAY CONTENT WITH YOUNG BOYS. IF THIS IS SOMETHING THAT IS ILLEIGEL FOR YOU TO READ STOP NOW. THE NAME OF A WEB SITE MALESUVIVOR.ORG IS A REAL SITE THAT HELPS WITH HEALLING OF ABUSE FOR MEN, BOYS, FRIENDS AND FAMILIES OF SURVIVORS, HOWEVER THE EVENTS THAT HAPPEN ON THE SITE IN THIS STORY ARE FAKE. THE SITE IS LISTED HERE FOR THOSE OF YOU THAT NEED HELP DEALING WITH CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE. Sorry this one is so short, but things are really rolling. I thought this needed a chapter all to itself. It closes a chapter in Justin's life.....or is does it? You may want to put on a seat belt at this time. The roller coaster of life is starting to fly! "Coming Out Within The Hurt" By: Kirk Gilbert © 2007 Chapter 3 "Caught" "Ready?" I said to Cody as I came down from my room. "yep." It was not really that hot out, but still warm at the same time. You could hear bird sing as they perched on the power lines above. Some kids were playing games in their front yards, and some parents watered their lawns. We headed to Cody's house that was across the street and around the block. We had not said much from the time we had left our after school get together, but that was normal for us. He kept looking at me, and it was making me nervous. "Hey want to watch Cop & A Half or Titanic?" Cody was first to speak. "Titanic" I replied still deep in thought about the conversation with shiver_boy. "You like Leo, huh?" He said while he was starting to laugh. "Fuck you!" He had my attention now. "I'll think about it." I stopped dead in my tracks. Cody turned and stopped. We just looked into each others eyes. Without another word he smiled, turned around, and continued on to his house. I knew Cody was just joking around just by the look on his face. You know the look that you get right before someone dose something to you. Well he had that look, and he thought my reaction was hysterically funny. Cody is always one to crack a good joke when you didn't think one could be made. I just was not used to this new type of joking around, but I must say, I did find it funny. Soon after I just shook my head and ran to get caught up with Cody. We arrived at his house that we soon found to be empty. It was not all that different from my house. Unlike my house you had to walk through the kitchen to the dinning room and then you could walk into the living room, or you could walk straight from the front door into the living room. We headed straight for the kitchen. Yeah, I know that's the last place you should find a boy, but we know just where to find one of our favorite things. That's right, food and drinks! I grabbed up a root beer and Cody got a Sunny Delight from the fridge. We sat down at the dinning room table where we found a note with twenty dollars. Cody, Your ant Jane died and we had to leave for the weekend. Here is twenty dollars for you and Justin to get a Pizza or something with. There is also a ton of food in the fridge. You know where the emergency phone numbers are and if you need anything you can call my cell or go next door. Above everything, STAY OUT OF TROUBLE! Love mom "Sorry Cody." I said trying to ease the pain. "Sorry for what? Ant Jane was a real bitch. My whole family hated her." "Oh." I said thinking I was looking real stupid. "Oh it's no big deal. The only reason my folks went was coz of the fam would be there, and to look like they really cared about my ant. My family has always been weird about looking good for each other." "We must be related coz my fam dose the same thing." I said laughing "Like I said today, we're brothers!" He said laughing, and trying not to fall out of his chair. We finished our sodas and headed for the living room to watch the movie. It was long, and we were beat from a long day at school. I took the floor as I almost always did, and Cody took the sofa that he was only half way on. The phone rang and Cody said he would be right back. I thought it would be a good time to step out side. I grabbed up some stuff from my back pack and headed for the side of the house. When I got back in Cody was just standing there with this mixed emotion on his face. "What?" I said. He came over to me and started moving around me in a close circle. "What in the hell are you doing, Cody?" "Why didn't you tell me you're in to drugs?" He stated almost yelling in a worried, but angered tone. "I'm not I..." "Bullshit Justin! Did you drop something?" He handed me a broken joint that must have fell from my back pack. "I also found three more along with this white powdered dope in your bag." "What, now you're going threw my shit too?" I was getting pissed "I will if I think you could die from that shit. Yes!" "Well I'm not going to die from it, asshole. I don't do that much anyways." "Even a little is too much, dope head. How long have you been on that shit anyways?" "A little over a year or so...I think...I don't know. What's it fucking matter?" "It matters coz it's killing you, shit head. That's what it matters. I don't want too loose you like I lost Brian." "Brian? Who's that?" I said softly, but surprised. "He died before we moved here five years ago. I loved him with all my heart. He was my hero. He was my world. He meant everything to me." Cody was now sobbing. I could tell he was trying not to cry, but he just could't hold out any longer. After he cried for a while he continued. "Justin, Brian was my real brother he was three years older than me. He said he never did enough to do any harm, but it killed him, and his friend. They took too much at a party one night. I'll never forget that, and I'll never forgive him for that either. It was drugs that took my brother away from me, and now it's going to take my best friend away from me too. I don't want to loose you to drugs as well. Yes I blame my brother for what happened, coz it was his choice to take that shit. It's your choice too, but it would kill me if I have to go through that again. I don't want to loose you too." Cody buried his face in my chest and cried for a long time. "I'm so sorry dude. I didn't know about Brian or even that you ever had a brother. I didn't know." "Yeah well I don't talk about that much, but that's why this shit scares me so bad. Will you please stop taking that stuff? Please?" He said still crying. "I'll try." "Why can't you just promise you won't take it anymore?" "I don't think I can go without it." I said at a near whisper. "You need help Justin, if not before, you need it now." "But who can I get help from that I won't get in trouble from?" "How about that shrink lady at school, talk to her, she might be able to help. If not her, she might know someone who can help." "I'll talk to her Monday, deal?" "Deal, if you need someone to go with you I'll go, I promise." Cody said more dead serious than I have ever seen him be in the years I have known him. "Deal and I can go alone, but be ready if I change my mind." "Ho, I will be" Even though we didn't say everything we were thinking, we really didn't need to. We have known each other for a very long time, well for kids anyways. I know that if I don't tell anyone, then Cody will. I really had no clue about his real brother, or anything with drugs ever happened to Cody. He simply never talked about it, but again, the subject never came up before. That weekend came and went quicker than I ever thought a weekend could go. I tried to keep my word about not getting high again, but I slipped up two or three times. I had knots in my stomach from the thought of having to go in and talk to Mrs. Walton in the morning. So rather than think about it I found things to do around the house, mostly in my room. I had to be the only kid with a super clean room. By the time I was all done with everything I wanted to do, and everything I kept finding for myself to do, it was six thirty in the morning so I hopped in the shower and then got ready for school. I put on the usual things I like for school, blue jeans, T-shirt, and sneakers. My stomach was in knots, and I felt like puking even if I had nothing to puke. I got to school a little late. Yes, I was dragging my feet from the moment I got out of the shower. I really didn't want to talk to Mrs. Walton, but I knew if I didn't then Cody would. I couldn't get mad at Cody, because he was just worried about me, and after what he told me I could see why. I still want to know why he never told me about Brian. I walked in to the office where the lady behind the desk asked for my pass. I told her I didn't have one, and that I was there to see Mrs. Walton, and that it was important. The lady told me to wait there while she looked to see if Mrs. Walton could see me. Soon after that Mrs. Walton came out, and asked. "So are we ready to talk now?" with an ever so nice smile and soft voice. "yeah ...got to or my friend will tell you." "Friend? Tell me what?" "Yeah my friend, and about what happen this weekend." I said sitting down in font of her desk where I had sat last time. "Want to tell me about it?" She said like all shrinks do while getting comfortable in the big tall back chair behind her desk. I told here about the drugs, and Cody's story along with the rest of my stay at Cody's house over the weekend, and she listened inductively. She covered her mouth when I told her about the drugs and needing help. I could see the tears in her eyes when I told about Cody's brother dieing from a drug over dose. "I just can't stop doing it." "Do you have any with you or here at school? I have to ask." "No. I don't take it to school, but I got some at home." I said softly. "Well first I need to talk to your mother about this. You're going to need some major help with this one. Also I am going to make the arrangements for you to start spending your fourth hour class of PE in here for us to talk about how things are going, and so I can keep a better eye on you as you heal from the drugs, that has been doing damage to your body. I can say this it's not going to be easy. Is there anything else you want to tell me?" "No, not right now, but do you have to tell my mom." "I'm sorry, but I have to. You're not eighteen. Sorry kiddo. But, I will do everything in my power to help you." We talked for a while longer till she said I could go, and gave me a pass to class. I left the office and headed to class. For all I knew my life was over.... PEACE IS BEAUTIFUL, BLAKE Well, have we hit rock bottom yet? It seems Justin has many skeletons in his closet. Who know what will happen next, but he is starting to get the help he needs. What will shiver_boy think about this? There are so many unanswered questions... Thank you for reading Coming Out Within The Hurt.