This is all fantasy fiction. None of the events are real.
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This story is an original work of fiction ©Copyright 2023 Tux - Please do not copy or post without permission.
I appreciate all the emails, suggestions, offers, and support that I get and for those who haven't emailed yet and are waiting or don't feel comfortable or safe emailing let me, let me express my gratitude for reading my story and tell you a little bit about my story. I've been reading nifty for many years about two months ago I just decided to start emailing people and let them know how much I appreciate their stories. I got replies almost instantly. The responses were supportive, encouraging, and some even held spoilers. I struck up a friendship with Andrew and it grew with my confidence and now Andrew is my most trusted editor. I cannot do this without him. Other authors like Lucas and Eric Murphy offer advice and support with my stories and it means the world to me. So, take a leap email an author and tell them how you feel, did you like the story did you not like it, all opinions matter to the author. Do you have suggestions on where you think the story could go, all suggestions interest the author. So take that leap and email your favorite author, you can change his day for the better, and might even influence or change the story. Thank you to all those that were supportive to me and I can't wait to show you the rest of... Counting.
This story and my other work can be found on AO3 at the following link. Tux Edwards - Archive of Our Own
Andrew Thomas and I are trying something new. We have co-written two characters. This chapter introduces Beau and Colt to Counting, however, they originally show up in Boys of Grizzly Valley 3 - Go Bag Find it here
They then show up in Andrew's Trust, chapter 6 for a few chapters. Feel free to read about them here They will be regulars here in Counting.
Being aware of my breathing isn't as easy as one would think. Out and in, out and in, sure we all have them mastered, but when you're told to hold the second one to steady your body from moving, it gets more complicated. I grip the barrel tightly, but not with a death grip. Out and in. Raising the barrel to my cheek, I take aim down the sights. Out and in, and hold, bring the sight on the target, and squeeze the trigger -- BANG! Then my hand slides the lever down, and the ejection port opens, kicking the empty casing out over my shoulder. With a flick of my wrist, the lever is back in position and loads a new bullet--BANG! I can do all this in a matter of seconds, and I do. BANG! BANG! BANG!
The plastic milk jug jerks violently on the string we have it tied to. We watch it swing back and forth, and the water inside it pours out of its ten holes. Dad pats my back and tells me, "That was a great grouping, AJ. Good job, little cowboy," and he pulls down my cowboy hat, making me giggle, and takes my empty rifle from me from over my shoulder.
From behind us, I can hear the older boys coming back from their stupid dance that I wasn't invited to. They are talking about me shooting my rifle.
"Wow, that was awesome! Did you see that?" Asks Zack.
"Man, little bro, that was so cool!"
I turn around and scowl at the boys, still in their tuxedos, but just barely. Not one of them has their bow tie tied or their vests buttoned; hell, Zeke isn't even wearing his jacket. Parker says with a weak smile, "We'll have to start calling you Deadeye."
"How was the party, boys?" Asks dad.
Parker talks the most, but Zeke says a few words. Zack just stares at me like he is so ashamed. Dad hands me my rifle after he loads it with five more rounds, and I check to make sure the safety is on. Zack walks over to me and asks softly, "You still mad?"
"Of course, I'm still angry!" I shout back. "Why couldn't I go?"
"Now, AJ, it was a welcome to the ninth-grade party," dad interjects. I look at him, daring him to stick up for Zack.
My scowl explodes. "I'm in the ninth grade too! And what about Parker? He went, and he's in tenth grade!" I yelled, pointing at Parker, and put him on the spot.
"Well, Parker is my boyfriend," whispers Zeke, to the surprise of Parker.
"I am?"
Zeke looks the most uncomfortable and begins to fidget. Once he finds his voice, it cracks almost immediately. "Is that okay?" he asks.
Parker smiles and takes his hand, saying, "Yeah. I'd like that."
Totally ignoring Zeke and Parker's little love awakening, I get close to Zack's face and whisper harshly at him, "Just say it! I know why, but I want you to say it!"
Zack looks unsure but whispers to me as if he is hoping I won't hear him, "I just wanted to hang out with kids my age for once. Why are you so angry about that?"
Pointing to Zack, I let him have it: "...and I'm supposed to be your boyfriend. Zack, I took the spanking so when you asked me, I could go to the dance. You should have taken me!" I walk away from him and pass Zeke and Parker mushing all over each other and yell, "GAWD!" As I throw up my hands and walk toward the house.
"AJ, don't be like that!" Dad says he's trying to defuse the situation.
"Dude? I can't believe you said that to him, harsh," Zeke says, taking a break from mushing out with Parker to scold me.
"Shut up," I tell him, annoyed. Wow, is AJ mad! I've never seen him so mad. I know I have to fix this, but I'm not sure if I want to. Does he have to be with me 24/7? Can't I hang out with my friends without having a little kid hold my hand? Soon we'll be real brothers; should we even be boyfriends anymore? Isn't being brothers enough? I sigh and begin my slow walk up to the house to fix this.
Turning the door handle, I begin to crack it open just a little bit. The wailing of AJ hollering and Mom saying she's had enough of his attitude for today is enough to make me hesitate. Stepping inside, I slowly begin to take off my jacket as Mom, sitting on one of the dining room chairs with AJ, no pants and no underwear, laying across her lap with his pale, beautiful ass up in the air. Mom just finished whipping that poor boy something fierce, as if AJ had snapped her last straw. He stands up and is sobbing and wheezing pretty well. I pull the emergency inhaler out of my pocket and walk over to show Mom.
She takes it, thanks me. Both of his hands block his ruby-red bottom from further assaults, but something tells me his defenses are not enough. Mom looks pissed. His jeans and white briefs hang tightly around his ankles. She didn't even unhook them; she just yanked them down. AJ's face is soaked with tears and is all contorted from sobbing and fighting for air.
Mom hands him the inhaler and reprimands him, "How dare you come in here yelling and screaming like someone cut your fool head off? And when I ask what's wrong, you say, `Don't fucking worry about it!' Are you kidding me? Don't ever talk to me like that, or to any adult, for that matter. You shouldn't cuss at all, because if I hear it again, you're eating soap for dinner, got it?"
AJ half-assed puffed on his inhaler, saying something inaudible that sounded like `I'm sorry,' and, with a shaky hand, gives it back to me. Then mom pointed a finger at me, and for a split second, I thought my little white ass was about to get tanned. "And you listen up, young man. You and your brother had better watch the cussing around AJ. He repeats everything he hears, and I know he got this from one of you. It stops now or you'll be eating soap while sitting next to AJ at dinner, you understand?"
My hands subconsciously goes to cover my butt, and I just nod, saying, "Yes, ma'am."
She turns to AJ, who hasn't stopped crying or shaking, for that matter, and points to him, saying, "Now go pick up that stool you kicked and go up to your room. I think you're supposed to be there anyway."
AJ squats down, and with one hand on his ass, he uses the other to try and pull up his jeans and underwear. They're so tight around his legs, he only manages to get them up above his knees so he can walk without falling. He works his way over behind the bar, and now I notice that my stool is lying over by the stove. So, he was taking out his anger on my stool. How immature. Mom and I watch the sobbing boy pick it up and then slowly make the walk of shame up to his room. His little ass is so red, it looks painful to do anything, and I bet it's a hundred degrees. Is it wrong that I want to go feel it?
"Zack," mom addresses me once AJ is out of sight.
"Yes ma'am."
She climbs up on AJ's stool, and I consciously move over to mine on the other side of the bar. She takes a deep breath and calmly says, "Why don't you tell me why he's so angry?"
"Well, it's like this," I sheepishly start. "The guys and I were talking last Friday about the `Welcome Dance' today, and they were like, `You're not bringing AJ, are you?' and I was like, `Yeah, why wouldn't I?' and they were like, `Um, cuz he's nine,' and I was like, `So, he always does things with us,' and they laughed and said, `What happens is someone likes you and wants to talk to you. You can't talk or dance with him with AJ holding your hand,' and I didn't know what to do cuz the first thing that went through my mind was, Some guy my age is interested in me?"
I take a second to catch my breath and look at her face. It's changed. She's trying to hold in a laugh. "And then, when we were at the rodeo arena while AJ was off with Beau, Zeke and I were off hanging with Alex and his cousins. After a while, they started making fun of me cuz my boyfriend is nine. It hurt real bad. I just don't know what to think or feel anymore." I laid my head on the bar and began to count the notches, and she reached over to play with the curls that had fallen on my face. "Oh, little Zack, I think what is bothering AJ is what is bothering you."
"I love AJ with all my heart..."
"...and you're wondering if that is enough for you."
"Yeah, I mean, I see Zeke and Parker, and they really love each other. I'm not sure if the love I feel for AJ is... the right kind of love. I think it's brotherly love, you know?"
Mom smiles at me and gives me a slight nod. "You're growing up, Zack. You and Zeke will be fourteen next weekend, and you're starting to think like adults. When we first met you, your feelings were all bottled up before you met AJ. He pulled the cork on that bottle, and you fell in love with the first person you saw. At your age, you shouldn't be nailed down, and you shouldn't be embarrassed by your boyfriend around your friends."
"I'm not embarrassed by AJ!" I blurt out defensively. Her look is both questioning and understanding at the same time. I slump back in my chair, knowing the lie I just told isn't believable to anyone, not even myself. "Oh my god... I am. Aren't I? I'm a terrible boyfriend. I'm a terrible brother." My tears tickle my cheeks as they begin to mirror my twisted feelings.
"Zack, honey, I'm so sorry," mom says, holding her arms out for me, and I take her up on her offer. I get off my stool and work my way over to her. Once my head hits her shoulder, I let it all out.
"He's changed so much in the past few months; I don't even recognize him anymore. He doesn't listen. He's constantly getting me in trouble cuz he runs off. He's always mad at me for wanting to do stuff I like. I just don't know what to do anymore."
"Shh, Zack, it will be okay. You've pulled my little boy from the darkness, and now he's addicted to being in the spotlight. Even Lana has been spending time with him, and that is something I thought I'd never see. One thing is clear: You must tell him how you feel. The longer you wait, the worse it is going to be for you when you do tell him."
I wipe my eyes and nose on my sleeve, yuk, and step back from her. Agreeing with her, I tell her, "I know, but I don't think I can. It's really going to hurt him. I mean, nothing will change, just that we won't be boyfriends." Her eyebrow goes up at that, and she gives me the `I don't want to know,' face, making me smile and chuckle. "I don't mean that. You know what I mean."
"So, what's his name?"
"Who?" I answer her question with a new question and try to look innocent with a shit-eating grin on my face.
"Okay, honey, keep your secrets. Just don't forget, you must tell AJ and try and do it tomorrow at the earliest, something tells me that if you tell him tonight, he might implode."
"Yes ma'am."
The night goes as anyone would expect, with Zeke and Parker celebrating their newfound love. Does it make me a bad person to see Zeke happy while I'm miserable and confused and hate them for it? Anyway, the rest of us sat and watched TV, and then it was time to go to bed. Mom and dad turn off the TV, and Zeke leads Parker to the back door, holding hands. Suddenly I get an odd feeling in my chest like I'm nervous, warm, excited, and unsure of myself. It's coming from Zeke, and I know what it is: it's love, but I don't recognize that feeling. I thought I loved AJ; what is wrong with me?
I get into the room and, after a quick count of the balusters--don't ask--I strip down naked, and sigh when I see AJ's little jeans with his tiny briefs still tangled up in them on the floor by the bed. So, I pick them up and toss them in the dirty hamper with mine. AJ lays on his side of the bed and has not moved since I got into the room. The sheet lays gently over him, with his bottom and back visible to me. The rosy evidence of the spanking is still showing slightly on his perfect cheeks. Man, two spankings in two days--he's having a rough week. I pull the covers back and gently slide onto the bed, getting into position to plug myself in next to my soon-to-be brother. Hesitating, I place my hand on his back; it's cold. I glide it down till it cups his bottom. The heat of the spanking is still there, and I suddenly feel worse. This is my fault.
My hand slides back up to AJ's back, and I kiss his neck. After the kiss, he pulls away. Not far, just enough to let me know he doesn't want me touching him. "AJ, I'm so sorry," I whisper and roll over to my side as far as I can go and close my eyes. I whisper a little prayer to anyone who listens for dreams of hope instead of nightmares about how I'm feeling.
Hearing mom moving around downstairs, I review my choices. I can stay here in bed, freezing my ass off, because AJ took all the covers, and I do mean all of them. He looks like a caterpillar wrapped in a cocoon. I was left with enough of the sheet to cover my knees, and I'm sure that was an accident. When he woke up in the middle of the night, he thought I was asleep, and so he gathered all the blankets on his side, leaving me naked and freezing. I didn't fight him or let him know I had been up all night feeling like I was the lowest life form on the planet. I figured I deserved this, so I just lay there and shivered. Well, now it's seven in the morning, and I'm getting up. It's better than sitting here and freezing my ass off.
I roll my legs off the bed and sit there. I feel terrible. I hate when I don't get any sleep. I am halfway down the stairs when I realize I'm still naked. I head back into the room and over to the pajama bottoms I keep on the dresser for my mornings. I slip them on, and the feeling inside makes me feel warm already. I grab one of my oversized hooded sweaters and head downstairs, dragging it behind me.
Stopping by the bathroom, I pee and clean up a little--my face, armpits, balls, and butthole. Then I head down to the kitchen, slipping my sweater over my head. I wrestle with getting my head out of the sleeve, but I get it on by the time I get to the bottom. Mom is sitting at the bar, and by my stool is a steaming cup of coffee. I walk over and take a seat. "Is this coffee for dad?"
"Nope, you look like you could use it, but just one," mom says, holding up her finger to emphasize my limit.
"I've never been allowed to drink coffee before."
"Here," she says, getting up from her stool to go to the refrigerator. Mom gets out some flavored creamer and pours some into my cup. She hands me her spoon and sets the creamer on the bar with us. The milky creamer swirls and is almost hypnotic with the smell of white chocolate tickling my nose.
"This smells great," and I take a little sip, "Oowe, it's still a little hot, but really good. Thanks."
"My lord, son, did you get any sleep?" She asks and plays with my hair a little.
"Not really; AJ was still mad at me, so I wasn't allowed covers. It doesn't matter; I couldn't sleep anyway. I just feel so bad."
"Why, for growing up. For realizing that the feelings you have for AJ aren't what you thought they were? Honey, you're talking to the `Queen of falling in love too fast.'" We laugh a little, and it feels good to be able to talk my feelings out like this. Maybe I'm not a total piece of shit. "I've been married twice already," she continues, "and soon to be three. I wish I could tell you that you get better at knowing what kind of love you have for a person, but you don't. Unfortunately, at your age, it's fleeting, and each time you learn a little more about what your heart needs, so will AJ. But Zack, you must tell him how you feel. No more sex until you do."
"What?! Why?!" I protested before it registered that my soon-to-be mom had just grounded me from having sex with my soon-to-be little brother. That is all kinds of messed up. I sit down in a huff, irritated that I already know the answer to my protest and why it has to be that way. "Fine, no more s...se..." I can feel my cheeks blushing as the word gets lodged in my throat.
"Sex," mom says with a finality in her voice. "Until you tell him how you feel, having sex with him will just feel... wrong. And if you two want to continue to have sex, you have to make his nine-year-old mind understand it's just for lust, not love."
I drink a little coffee and lay my head on the bar, feeling the heat from the mug on my face. "Can you stop saying the word `Sex' please?" Mom smiles and heads into the kitchen, kissing me on the forehead as she passes. She asks me if I have anything I want to eat for breakfast, and I tell her eggs and bacon sound good. I plan on staying here and mulling over what she said, trying to decide what I'm going to do when she places a big glass bowl in front of me and the carton of eggs.
I look up at her with a look of confusion on my face, and she suggests, "Why don't you help me make breakfast this morning?"
Mom and Zack let me sleep in, and when I woke up, I found a plate of cold eggs and bacon sitting on the nightstand. Zack must have picked the breakfast. He always makes eggs and bacon. My nose curls, spite, and pride take over. I don't need his breakfast. I just won't eat.
I take my naked body to the second floor to pee, and the noise of the TV is coming from the living room. I kneel next to the handrail and peek to see what's going on. The floor is cold and feels good on my sore butt. My legs spread out far enough so my butthole sits on the cool wood. My attention is diverted by trying to get my balls to lay completely on the floor, and that leads to me playing with my dick when Lana's door opens, but Lana isn't the one that comes out...
"So, do you just like want to meet me at the mall or... Lana, your little brother is out here with a hard-on," announces her friend, laughing.
"Really, take his picture," Lana teases back as she rushes to the door.
I jump up and rush to the bathroom door, but in my hurry, I miss the knob slamming into it. Stumbling back, I reach for my sore head. Her stupid friend says, "Wow! He's really hung for his age! What is he, over four-inches?"
"Yeah, he's going to break some boy's hearts as he gets older," Lana says, giving me a wink. I cover my dick with my hands, as much as I can, as Lana walks up next to me and opens the bathroom door for me. I'm so embarrassed I can barely breathe. I walk sideways into the bathroom, so they can't see my butt, and right before I close the door, I hear from Lana's friend, "Look at this picture, he's so cute, and I just can't get over how hung he is!"
"Moooommmm!" I shout from the bathroom, "Lana's friend has naked pictures of me!"
From the safety of behind the door, I hear mom come out of her office, I'm guessing, saying, "Girls, erase those pictures please," making me smile.
"Yes, Mrs. D. Too bad, your son is really cute."
"Thanks, Steph, I guess," says mom with a little laugh, then adds, "Boys will be boys."
Once I calm down and the hallway becomes still, I have a proper pee and decide to take a shower without anyone telling me to. The water feels good, and I wrench my back and neck trying to see if my ass has returned to its normal color after the spanking from yesterday. Mom is kind of wild when she spanks me. There is no telling how many times and how hard. To make things worse, she has terrible aim, and my legs take a lot of the swats, making it not so bad as spankings go. Now, Dad's spanking has been hurting for days, and every single one of his swats were in the same spot, making it hurt so much. I poked my ass in different spots and only winced once.
I begin lathering up my dark green luffa and coat my midsection with soap suds. Then I stand with my back to the shower and watch my little dink stand to attention, and a smirk cracks my face. Gliding my fist over my steel rod, I close my eyes till I'm half-lidded. The wave of pleasure fills my body as if I had drunk hot cocoa on a cold Montana morning. My finger slides down my butt crack and circles my rosebud. Sighing from the slight pleasure, I can feel my hole twitch as if it wants to suck my finger in. It slips in and out, but after having Zack in me for so long, my finger just doesn't do it for me. Looking around for ideas, I'm about to give up when I see Zack's toothbrush, which makes me smile.
With the shower water raining down on me, I lube the toothbrush up with conditioner and slide it past my first ring easily, then the second one. I push it in until at least three-quarters of it is in my rosebud. My eyes roll back in my head, and I exhale in blissful pleasure. I move it around until I feel that little boy button and begin moving in and out, hitting that spot. I kneel and lay my face on the tiled floor with my ass up. Moans start slipping out as I begin to jack off my hard cock. Breathing through my mouth, I lick my teeth as my favorite memories of Zack flash through my mind. Moans escape in between my grunts.
Knock, knock, knock... "Hey little bro, I'm coming in to do your meds," says Zack.
"No! Don't come in!" I yell and yank the toothbrush out of my butthole with an inhaled hissing sound from it, which smarts a little. Note to self: take toothbrush off my list as a substitute dick. It's too thin and too hard. I trip over myself as I try to put the brush back on its hanger before he comes in and almost headbutt the toilet. Recovering, I sit up on my knees and look at the toothbrush. It begins to blur out and suddenly I can't feel it in my hand and then, my world goes... black.
Knock, knock, knock... "Hey little bro, are you okay? Did you just fall? AJ! Answer me!" Knock, knock, knock...
I push myself up on my knees and hold my hands out in front of me. The shaking in my hands, the killer headache, and the blackout, it can't be. It's impossible; I'm supposed to be cured.
"That's it, I'm getting mom!"
"No, no, I'm sorry! Hold on!" I beg and hurry to put his butthole toothbrush on his hanger and unlock the door.
Zack comes in and acts like the floor is covered with lava. "Jesus, AJ, what were you doing in here?" and he rushes to turn off the shower.
"I was taking a shower all by myself before you came banging on the door, scaring me half to death!"
He takes the big fluffy towel and drapes it over my head, gets the rest of them in the linen closet, and uses them to soak up the floor and stop the water flow from the open shower. "Did you think maybe you should have closed the shower door?" Clarity is very quickly replaced by guilt, and then anger for him not inviting me replaces the guilt, and now I'm back to where I was before my relaxing shower when he messed up.
"What do you want anyway?"
Zack has a shocked look on his face as he cleans up my water mess on the floor. "Hey, watch your tone. I did your morning chores and let you sleep in. I made you breakfast, and I'm here to make sure you don't forget your meds."
I finish drying off my body and hang the towel up, displaying my four-inch hard-on that he can't have till he makes up for not inviting me. "See anything you like...too bad!"
"All I want is this," he rolls his eyes and spins me around in front of the toilet, joking, "but the hole is a little puffy," and his pinky slips right in as he continues, "-and it looks like it's been spanked to death." I hear the zipper open on the black medical bag and him rutting around in it.
I turn to yell at him, "Hey! You can't do that! You're grounded from touching my butthole." and he pulls his pinky out to force me to bend over once again. Every morning is the same: I have to bend over the toilet and stare at this stupid wicker bowl with potpourri in it. "You can't have it! This free cow is milkless until you stop being mean to me." Turning around again, I see him filling the syringe, but before he's done, he turns me back around again.
"That's fucked up; where did you even hear that?" He asks while flipping the air bubbles out.
I can feel the pressure on my back when he pushes it into the injector. I patiently wait, and when I feel the pressure release, I stand up, and Zack flicks my ear. "Owe! I'll tell mom!" I yell.
"Shut up, and bend over," he says as he fills the syringe again about a quarter of the way up. "Since I let you sleep till 10:30 am, you need a little more to fill it. The light is still yellow." Hmm, strange, but okay--whatever. It's not like I can see the light turn green, so I bend over, and as he injects the last bit, I give my butt a little wiggle to remind him he's not getting this anymore.
My...cock...is ...about...to...bust...nut...all...over...my...clean...underwear. AJ looks so good naked. And with him bent over, I can see his little pink star wink at me. `Zack concentrate' I tell myself, and put the last little bit in his injector as he is wiggling that perfect ass and his little cute balls underneath... No, stop thinking about it! "Go on, go back to your room, you horndog." I joke with him, trying to lighten the mood.
He rushes out, but not before sticking his tongue at me. So, now I need to jack-off. After `doing the deed' and finishing cleaning up after my little brother, I walk into the hall adjusting my rehardening cock, thinking about telling mom about the injector acting funny, and she is leaning on her door frame with a huge smile on her face.
"You, um, didn't tell him, did you?" She asks startling me. Guilt and a little embarrassment hang on my face, and she already knows the answer to her question. The cum that you can never get out of your dick until you stand up, it's flowing down my balls and soaking my underwear. She comes over to me and helps me with all the wet towels I'm carrying. She takes them all but one that I hold on to so I can cover my growing dick and the mess it's making. Mom sees where I'm holding it and then realizes why I'm blushing. She chuckles and adds, "You're a good brother, Zack. He's lucky to have you looking out for him."
Am I, though? Wait, wasn't there something I needed to tell her?
Two and a Half Hours Later
As I climb the stairs to the bedroom, I balance AJ's lunch tray. Mom said if it was too uncomfortable for me, she would do it, but I told her I'd like to try and sit and talk to him; besides, I have a bone to pick with him. Entering the room, my eyes quickly flash over to the balusters, and I begin to count them before I can stop it. `I don't need to count those; I know there are forty-eight.'
"Hey little bro, I brought your lunch," I announced my entrance before I could see him, and what I saw impressed me. Every time I think I've seen it all with this kid, he proves me wrong.
I sit on the bed and watch as AJ, wearing only a red t-shirt, works feverishly on what I can only describe as a four-foot-long by a two-foot-deep replica of this house made from Legos. I mean, sure, it was only the first floor, but it wasn't there when I checked on him this morning at ten. He is just now starting on the second floor, and I'm guessing when he's done, it'll be as tall as him.
"Wow, AJ, this is cool. I can't believe how perfect it looks."
"Yeah, when it's done, even the inside will look just like our house." He gets up and kicks some legos at my feet as he walks over to me, his hard little cock just swinging back and forth. He clearly plans on `Winnie the Poo'ing,' it till we leave this evening for the grand opening ceremony at the rodeo. "Oh, here, mom made you a sandwich," I tell him, and then pull my toothbrush out of my jeans' back pocket and lay it on the sandwich.
His face contorts in discuss, and he flicks it off with his finger, then quickly wipes it on his shirt. "Yuk! Don't put that on there!" Then he takes the top piece of bread it was sitting on and tosses it in the trashcan next to the nightstand.
I give him a stern look and ask, "Why? What's wrong with it?"
He folds the rest of his sandwich and takes a bite, thinking carefully about his next words. With a mouth full of food, he asks, "Did you use it?"
I let my stern look change into a smile when I answered, "No, I didn't use it," causing him to start giggling. "Do you think that I wouldn't recognize the smell of your butt after almost a year of licking it?"
He walks back to the Lego house and sits cross-legged, laughing his fool head off. "I wish you would have used it; that'd be funny," he mused. I even chuckled a little at how innocent his plot to get revenge has been, first with the covers and now with the butt toothbrush.
"Hey, can we talk?" I ask, sitting down on the floor so I can be at his level. "First: I really need you to put some underwear on."
"Oh, come on, at least admit you really want to suck me off or fuck me." He says wiggling that smooth, perfectly cut, and slightly shiny bell end that is just a little darker than the shaft. Shit... I think I'm drooling. I take his apple from the tray and bite into it. It helps a little bit, but I still turn my head and point to the dresser, adding, "Go!"
He reluctantly goes and puts on some boxers and then returns with a small smirk on his face, knowing he's getting to me. He sits down, and just the bell pokes out of his boxer's pee-slit. "Are you ready to say sorry yet?"
"Oh my god, AJ, I didn't do anything wrong!" The worried look on his face makes me calm down, if only a little. "Look, okay, this is going to be hard to tell you. Hell, it might be impossible for you to understand. I don't even understand."
Slowly his tears begin to trickle down from his eyes, dreading the worse, and it chokes me up. "I'm going through something called puberty, and it's changing my body,"
He interrupts me with sniffles and wipes some of the tears on his red sleeve. "Like the hair under your arms and around your dick?"
I just nodded and continued as I felt a tear fall from my eye. "That's right, but my cock is getting bigger too. I know you're having trouble with it when we fuck. The last time it hurt you for a couple of days, didn't it?"
He nods, then quickly adds, "-but I don't mind. I like your dick. It's not like I'm bleeding or anything."
"I know, buddy; I've been keeping an eye on your hole after we do it. But that isn't my only concern... " Oh my god, this is hard. "See, there are different types of love, and when we met, my love for you wasn't like a boyfriend, it was more like lust. I mean, well, you're hot as hell. You understand, don't you? It's what you're feeling now. You just can't get enough of our sexual play... and there isn't anything wrong with that, but now that I'm older... I want more, understand?"
His wheels are turning a mile a minute, and he tries to make sense of what I tried to say. His head nod makes me sigh that he understands. That will make it easier on me, which made what he says next almost kill me: "So, you don't love me anymore." He spins around so his back is to me and begins to cry so hard that it just breaks my heart. "You can fuck me all you want; I can take it. Don't replace me."
I wrap him in my strong arms and try to explain again, "Of course I love you. There is no replacing my little brother, and no matter what, if you need me, I'll be there. I love you no matter what you do or what happens. But the love I have for you is stronger than it ever was. We're family now." I pull his small, trembling frame into my lap and rock him gently. You've had a tough week, and I'm sorry to add to it like this, but this is good news for you too."
His tearful eyes look up at me and ask, "How?"
"This means you can do stuff with your friends too. You're too young, AJ, to be tied down to one boyfriend. You should be playing with all the gay boys, I can think of one that will jump at the chance to have that massive dick of yours in his ass."
His eyes move around as he sifts through that photographic memory of his and asks, "Ash?"
I nod, and he gives me a blushing smile and says, "And all the other boys that might want to `try' stuff."
"But all my friends are your friends?"
"It's true, being in a higher grade than the kids your age like you are, it will be harder, but you will find a way, I'm sure."
"But... we can still play, right? I mean, you and Zeke still play, right?"
"Well, we'll have to rethink how, so that I'm not hurting you, but yeah, sure, I'd like that. Just not as boyfriends, understand?" And his teary head nods.
"The Universe is Made of Stories, Not of Atoms" -Muriel Rukeyser
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Edited by Andrew Thomas