Date: Wed, 14 Mar 2001 16:49:12 -0500 From: fsw99 Subject: Chapter 9 of Dear Diary Legal Notice: The following story contains descriptions of graphic sexual acts. The story is a work of fiction and has no basis in reality. Don't read this story if: **You're not 18 or over, **If it is illegal to read this type of material where you live, **Or if you don't want to read about gay/bi people in love or having sex. The author retains copyright to this story. Placing this story on a website or reproducing this story for distribution without the author's permission is a violation of that copyright. Legal action will be taken against violators. E-mail responses to the stories, story suggestions or other 'constructive' comments or advice may be sent to: fsw99@mindspring.com. All e-mails will be answered. DEAR DIARY By Stan Chapter Nine "I don't want to be your best friend. I love you. I want to be your boyfriend. If I can't have that, being your best friend would hurt lots more than losing you completely. I would be wishing for more every day I was with you. It would just hurt too badly. I can't do that. I just can't," Matt answered, as he turned away from me and ran for home. I watched him run away from me, stunned. I had lost him. I had totally lost him. I walked dejectedly towards my house, my head spinning. Maybe I could get Brian and Bruce to talk to him. Maybe all four of them. But, they were all boyfriends, and I didn't know if Matt would listen. All he wanted was what they had. They all did seem totally happy together. Each pair seemed to really know each other inside and out, and were pissed when they found out something that they didn't know about the other person. That had happened earlier today with Bruce and Dave. I was totally depressed. I had lost my best friend, probably forever. And I loved him!! Why did all of this have to have happened? I stopped walking and just stared into space. What had I just said? OK, thought. Thought, said, who gives a fuck? I loved him? I LOVED HIM? Yeah, that is what I had said/thought. Thought/said. Fuck this!!! I loved him and I knew it. And, it finally dawned on me that what he had just said to me before he ran off was that he loved me and couldn't just be friends. And I loved him back, but didn't tell him. What an idiot!! All this time, I had been secretly blaming Matt for all our troubles, and all he was trying to do was show me how much he loved me. I understood so much more now after walking to school with Brian, Nate, Bruce and Dave. They could openly talk about how much they loved each other. Why couldn't I? Yeah. YEAH!!!! Why couldn't I? They were all comfortable being boyfriends. That was all that Matt wanted. And, I did love him!!! I DID LOVE HIM!!! I knew it now, I knew it in my heart!! Why couldn't I tell him? I could. I WOULD!!! After what had seemed like hours, but actually less than a minute, I started running after Matt. I had to see him, and I had to see him NOW!!! It didn't take long to get to his house. I was winded from the long run, but not much. I didn't sprint all the way. I wanted to be in complete control when I talked to Matt. When I was finally at his front door, I started to knock or ring their door bell, but I knew both of his parents weren't home from work yet, and none of the three brothers would mind if I came in, so I tried the door, found it unlocked, and walked in. I removed my shoes at the door so Matt's Mom wouldn't bar me from their house for the rest of my life, and put them next to Matt's. I guessed that no one else was home. I walked carefully through the downstairs, and didn't see Matt. I walked up the stairs to his room, and saw that the door was closed. I didn't know if it was a good idea to just open it and come in, especially the way Matt had been acting towards me, so I just opened it a fraction of an inch and looked inside. Matt had taken off all his clothes except his briefs, and was laying on his side away from the door. I could tell he was crying softly. Oh shit! What do I do now? Barge in and tell him how sorry I was? Ask him to forgive me? Tell him I love him, too? What if he throws me out of his room? I made what I now think was one of the best decisions of my life. It has been only a few hours since then, but I do. I just pulled the door shut and walked out! Are you crazy? Of course I didn't do that! I did pull the door shut, not where the lock would engage, but just to block out any sounds. Then, I started to take off all my clothes. As fast as I possible could!! I was naked in seconds. I opened the door as silently as I could, dropping my clothes near the door as I eased it shut. Again, I shut it but didn't use the lock. I didn't want to make any unnecessary noise. I walked silently over to where Matt was laying. He still hadn't heard me when I laid down next to him on the bed. He rolled over like he was being attacked. What could you expect? He had thought he was alone. I caught his arms and forced him down on his back, with me on top of him. "Matt, I am really sorry. I guess I really didn't understand what you have been trying to tell me for the last few days. I think I do now. And I love you, too." Matt had a look of hate in his eyes as he had stared up at me at first, but now that look melted from his face. "Really?" "Really. And I want to be your boyfriend, more than anything." Matt didn't say anything. His mouth fell open and he just stared at me. "Are you sure?" "Yes, I am positive. I think I fell in love with you two days ago, but I just couldn't make myself say it or believe it. But, I do love you, and I'm not ashamed to say it to you." Matt just stared up at me, but he did have a smile on his face. I saw a tear trickle down his cheek. "You know I love you." "Yeah, I know. You have made that perfectly clear. I was just confused. Our four brothers helped me understand this morning." Matt got a confused look on his face. "Four brothers? Oh, I get it." "I am tired of talking. You want to be my boyfriend or not?" I asked roughly. Matt stared up at me with a big grin on his face. "I don't know. You sure aren't asking me very nicely. Maybe I should just turn you down and look for someone better." "You could get someone better, huh?" I asked, as I released his wrists and started tickling him with both hands. "No!! No!! Quit!! I give up!! OK, I'll be your boyfriend, if you will just STOP!!!" he screamed. I stopped tickling him and grabbed his wrists once more, pinning him to the bed. "And you will be my boyfriend from here on? You won't want anyone else?" Matt just grinned up at me. "Not if you don't." "Well, you have to prove it to me. You have to be my slave for the rest of the day. You have to do anything I tell you. Think you could do that?" Matt just grinned bigger. "I think so." I released his arms and started tickling him once more. "You can't just think so, slave, you have to know so. Now can you or not?" "QUIT!!! I will. I promise. I will do anything you say for the rest of the day if you will do one thing for me!!" I quit tickling him, and grabbed his wrists again and forced him back down. "And what is that, slave? Masters don't usually give favors to slaves." "I just wanted you to kiss me," Matt answered with a look of hunger in his eyes. "I think that might could be arranged," I answered, as I leaned down and kissed Matt passionately I could tell an immediate reaction from both Matt and myself. We were not lying nearly as close together as before down below. It was like two pistons were trying to pry us apart. (OK, I know pistons are overdoing it, but you get the point, right? Hehehe) In any case, we were grinding against each other and getting more and more aroused. I thought about everything that I had learned from my four new brothers. I was getting used to the idea that they were now my brothers. And I liked that idea. I forced Matt's legs up my back, as I kneeled over his body, in between his legs, still keeping his hands pinned. "Raise your hands, slave, when I release them. Grab the bed posts. You have to be naked like I am." Matt got a wild look in his eyes, as he realized for the first time that I didn't have anything on. "Yes, master. Be gentle with me, please!" "I don't know if you deserve me to be gentle. I may have to take you by force. If you are a good little slave, I might cut you a break." "Cut me a break? Come on, you can think of something better to say than that, can't you?" Matt giggled. "Oh, now you have to suffer! You have pissed off your Master. Now, you have to pay!!! Just stay right there, slave, don't move or else!" "Or else what?" Matt asked, grinning as I walked over and got my socks. It took me a little while to find both of Matt's socks under all of his discarded clothes on the floor, but I found them. Matt watched while I tied each pair together. "What are you going to do with those?" Matt asked with a question on his face. "For me to know and you to find out, slave. You will see soon why I am the Master and you are the slave." I grabbed his left hand, stretched it out against the spindle of his bed post and ran the two tied socks though it and then around his wrist. I put two knots in it, where he couldn't get it loose. "Come on, you don't have to tie me up. I'll do anything you want me to do," Matt said, a little afraid. "Matt, you know I won't hurt you. I just want it this way, OK?" He just grinned back. "OK." I grabbed his other wrist, and he didn't resist. Quickly, I had both his hands tied and he was immobile. I hadn't totally planned this out, and I wasn't sure what I was going to do next, but decided quickly. I had better do it before I chickened out. I walked over the foot of the bed with Matt watching every step I took. He had a big grin on his face, waiting for what was coming. But, he sure wasn't expecting what I did next. I crawled in between his legs and took his dick into my mouth all at one time. I heard him gasp when I did it. I kind of gasped when I did it, too. I wasn't sure if I could or not. The taste wasn't anything like I had been imagining. I had thought I might throw up if I tried it. But, it didn't taste bad at all. I kind of liked the taste. I kind of liked it a lot. And I could tell from all the noise above as I ran my lips up and down the shaft that Matt liked it, too. Probably lots more than I did. Matt began to really buck his hips as he came closer, and I just let my head ride him. He was doing all of the work now, and all I had to do was hold on for the ride. I could feel him tense, and I had my first real doubts. Did I really want him to cum in my mouth? I wasn't sure. What the Hell, I had done this much. Why not do it all? I didn't have to wait for very long. Seconds later, Matt shot several streams of hot cum into my mouth, yelling loudly as he did. Huh! What had I been so worried about? The taste wasn't bad at all. I kind of liked it. I looked up to see Matt conked out, but with a smile still on his face. That look was worth everything I had done for him. I had pleased my boyfriend, my lover, and that was all that mattered. I went over and untied him so he would be more comfortable. He finally opened his eyes and looked over at me. "Thanks. That was awesome. I love you." I walked over next to him. "I know. I love you, too." I leaned down and kissed him once more, then stood back up, looking down at him. "You didn't have to do that, you know. All I wanted was you to tell me you love me and wanted me to be your boyfriend. If you never want to do that again, you don't have to. Why did you decide to do it, anyway?" "I had a long talk with our brothers on the way to school. They explained I shouldn't think I had to do it if I didn't want to. That you should never do something sexual just because you think you owe somebody cause they did it to you first." "How did that help?" Matt exclaimed. "Well, Dave also said that when Bruce went down on him first, he didn't know if he could do the same to Bruce or not, but when he saw how great Bruce was making him feel, he had to do the same for him. They all said that they do for each other what they do out of love for their partner. After you ran off, I finally figured out that I loved you, too, and I just decided to tell you and show you." Matt grinned hugely. "That's sweet." "Kind of a screwed up combination, huh? Tough karate guy who is also sweet." "I wouldn't have it any other way. But I mean it. If you don't want to do that any more, it would be fine with me. I just want you to love me. That is enough." "Oh, no. You can't get away from me that easy. I want some more of that tasty little sausage you have between your legs. When you are ready again, I want us to both try it at the same time, like Bruce and Dave said they did their first time. I'm horny just thinking about it." "You said little sausage. Am I too small for you?" Matt asked quietly. "Matt, you are perfect just the way you are. Your body is really sexy. I wouldn't want it any bigger. It fit perfectly in my mouth. It didn't hit the back of my throat, so I didn't gag. It didn't stretch my mouth because it was too big around. You are worried about nothing. I love you just like this." Matt looked like he was about to cry, then jumped up and hugged me to him so hard I thought he was going to squeeze all the air out of my lungs. "That makes me so happy. I love you so much." "I love you more," I said, as I started kissing him and running my hands up and down his back. Matt practically purred in my arms, as my hands massaged his butt cheeks. I could feel him start to get hard once again between our bodies. I was already rock hard. I ran my hands around his thighs and between our bodies, and I could feel him shiver with excitement. I slowly let both hands run from his thighs all the way up his body to his neck and shoulders, gently massaging as I went. "Oh God!" Matt moaned as I continued. We had broken off our passionate kiss and were now just giving each other small pecks on the face and lips. I let my fingers trace down his chest to his nipples, which I made small circles around with my fingers. I could feel the tips already starting to harden, so I lightly pinched them to help them on their way. I also could hear Matt's moans get a little louder and also felt his dick stick into my stomach a little harder. Matt finally pushed me away, and grabbed my hand. "Come with me. I kind of like the idea of a 69 right now, too. I especially like it because you want it, too." "Hey, I thought I was the Master?" "We can take turns. Now, lie down with your head at the foot of the bed. Not at the very end, a couple of feet down." I didn't know exactly what he had in mind, but it seemed like a good idea, so I did it. Matt made me move up a little until I was exactly like he wanted me, and then he climbed on top of me. From the opposite direction. Suddenly, it did make lots of sense, as I stared up at Matt on his hands and knees above me, with his hard dick hanging right down in front of my face. This I understood perfectly well, so I took it into his mouth eagerly, as he did mine. He pulled off long enough to say, "Go slowly. I want to make this time last. I came way too fast last time." We both started doing more licking than sucking. But even doing that, we were moaning in between our licks. We were so into pleasuring each other that neither of us heard the door to Matt's room push open. I guess that was my fault for only pushing it completely closed. Anyway, we were both shocked to hear Brian say, "Where is a camera when you need it the most?" We both stopped in mid-lick. We both froze. Matt slowly turned his head back at the same time I pushed my head up to where I could see upside down. All four other boys were standing inside the room. All had huge grins on their faces. "I guess our talk to Jamie didn't do much good, did it, guys?" Brian laughed. Matt got off of me and we both stood up, wet boners and all. Neither of us were embarrassed at all, which was kind of amazing. "Actually, it helped more than you think. After I thought about everything all of you said, I finally decided that I really did love Matt, and if I did, I wanted to do anything I could to show him how much I did love him. And I wanted to do this. In fact, I have already done it once before you came in snooping around," I said. "Yeah, and we are officially boyfriends. So either leave us alone for some quality love making time or join us. Your choice. I do have a big bed. But make your minds up quickly, because I am really horny after waiting for 13 years for my first and only boyfriend," Matt kidded. "And hopefully, the only one you will ever have," I answered, hugging him to me and kissing him passionately. "Wouldn't you two really rather be alone?" Nate asked. "Yeah, if you want to know the truth. I feel really funny standing here with a hard on in front of all of you. But not that funny. I have been telling Matt that you are all my four brothers ever since I came over here after Matt ran off, and I feel that in my heart. All of you really did help me this morning, and I appreciate it. I'll show you how much as time goes on. Somehow, all of us together just seems right. So, join us if you really want to," I answered. "But, we are going to continue with or without you." Everyone just burst out in laughter and came over and hugged both Matt and I. I guess I did get that hug everyone said this morning they would give me later. I really felt like I was now part of the group, part of a new family. I was absolutely glowing with happiness. We finally broke the group hug, Brian and Nate and Bruce and Dave kissed quickly after exchanging huge smiles, and clothes started flying all over the room. Soon, there were six totally naked boys in the room, and we were trying to fit six bodies onto one queen sized bed. Hey, when you are young, you can do anything, at least that is the way it seems. I laid down in the middle like I was before, Nate laid down to my left and Dave to my right. All three brothers decided that they all wanted to be kneeling over the top. Now remember, diary, four days ago, the only sex I had ever had was with my right hand. OK, I guess with my left hand, too. Got to build up that coordination, you know? Might help my karate!!! hehehe I had heard about orgies from studying ancient Rome. I had always thought they would have been disgusting. But, I don't know now. I had a clear view of Brian thrusting down into Nate's mouth on my left and Bruce doing the same to Dave on my right. I was a novice. I was watching both of them unashamedly. I saw that they too, were watching me, maybe more so than I was them. They had thought this morning that I couldn't possibly do what I was doing, and I was doing it without shame. In fact, I was having the time of my life! Nate was the first to let Brian out of his mouth and lean over and kiss me on the cheek. Then Dave did the same thing. I let Matt out of my mouth to kiss Brian, and he turned his face to me at the last moment, and we kissed mouth to mouth. Talking about throwing gasoline on a fire!!! That started a whole new set of circumstances. Hands started flying everywhere. I would suck Matt for a little bit, then kiss either Dave on my right or Nate on my left. We would stimulate our partners enough to keep them fully hard and enjoying our love making, but also making our love making last LOTS longer. We could tell from the body movements above that the three brothers were also getting in on the act, just they didn't have use of their hands like we did. It seemed to go on for hours, days. I have no idea. All I know is when I finally exploded, it was WAY BEYOND anything I had ever experienced in the past. Thank God Matt exploded at almost the same time, or I might have chocked and died right there. All I know is when we all finally recovered, we were in a mass of tangled arms and legs. Everyone was lying all over everyone else. It was like a house of cards that finally topples over. If you start with the deck of cards, all in order of suits, when the cards finally collapse, some are face up, some are face down, and the order has been totally changed. That is the best way to describe our bodies. We all took several minutes to recover. When someone finally recovered completely, they would say something. If anyone answered, they would talk quietly until all six of us was back to reality. I have no idea where I was in the pecking order. Maybe third or fourth. I don't know. All I know is I wasn't the first and I wasn't the last. Unpiling was more difficult than setting up. No one had a clear path to get up. We did manage it, though. Didn't I tell you previously that when you are young, you can do anything? When all of us were on our feet, we just stood there, staring at each other with huge grins on our faces. Six naked boys, all really exhausted, and not caring if anyone looked at them at all!! Matt was the first to speak up. "I can't believe it. Wasn't that the best you have ever had?" Everyone had to agree. I certainly did. Matt ran over and hugged and kissed me. I kissed back just as hard. The other four actually applauded. I knew now I was part of a new family. I was loved by all. All the other four came over and hugged and kissed me, everyone. I really thought it couldn't get any better than this. Boy, was I wrong. To be continued. Comments are appreciated and always answered. Comments can be sent to fsw99@mindspring.com and are forwarded to a group e-mail account so all the guys can read them too.