Reformatted
Please note: This is a true story about what happened to ME. It started when I was 8. This includes various forms of sex between teenagers and a boy (grade schooler). If this is not your thing, do not read. If freedom of expression and thought is prohibited where you live and this written account of a person's life is illegal, then do not read it either. All rights are reserved and protected by the author.
This is my FIRST attempt to write a story of any type, besides what I had to do in school all those years ago. It is based on my memories of the events. Any feedback is welcome. Spams and haters will be blocked. Email is at bottom of the page, after you read the story.
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Category: Gay/young-friends/ [T/b, b/b (oral and anal) next will include TTT/b]
Learning How to Be a Big Boy
[and the lasting effects of childhood events]
(part 1)
This is basically the story of my life or at least the parts that have really had major impacts on me, and that left lasting impressions on me. These long-lasting effects on me that might be relevant to help others or at least how pain and hurting a young person can affect him the rest of his life. Please keep in mind that the names have all been changed in this to protect the innocent and even the evil despicable bastards. This is TRUE, and not some fantasy, this is what happened to me growing up.
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When I was growing up I was the older of two children. My younger sister is a couple years younger than I am and handicapped severely. So I was protective of her but also that meant that she got most of the attention growing up. My toys would be broken by her often a day or 2 after I got them on my birthday or Christmas. Even when they within a month of each other, so the few I got for my B-day were even more special, since most the family forgot my B-day because it was only a few weeks after Xmas. :( I was always told she didn't mean to. But when you're aged 6 – 9 when your toy that you had just got for Christmas or your birthday the day or two before is destroyed it still hurts. Even if it was not intentional it still hurts. It hurts even more when your parents don't seem to grasp that pain you're suffering because of it and kind of tell you to grow up. I never had a normal childhood because of that. I was always the one that my friends, the few (3) I had, would have negotiate for them when they wanted something from their parents, like staying over or going to play. This was mostly after I was 10 because before that I had a 2 friends and really they were not much of a friend looking back. Both of them were using and manipulating of me in different ways.
My little life totally went upside down the during the spring after my 8th birthday. Our neighbor across the small side, we lived at the corner, had a teenage soon (John), 16 or 17 as he could drive. I thought that was cool. I never knew what the car was but know I know it to be a Convertible Mustang, 1965-1966.
He first babysit my sister and me for New Year’s Eve. He and his girlfriend were having problems and we ended up talking about it. I have always been “logical” and straight forward in my thinking, so I gave him my ideas as an almost 8-year-old. IE the innocence of youth. Being a pretty bright boy, it gave him Insight to seeing things without the “blinders” that teen love can cause.
He gave me a big hug and told me I was a really good boy and he said I thought a lot more like an older kid, instead of being almost 8. I was on cloud nine because this cool teenager was complimenting me and saying I was COOL.
Everything was fine until the next time he babysat my sister and I. It was in that spring right around my mom's birthday in March. He was babysitting my sister and myself, but he also had his girlfriend's little brother with him when he came over. He had already told my parents he had to watch him, and they said it was okay.
Just like on New Year's Eve he had me take a bath and he helped me again with it which I thought was kind of strange but didn't really say anything about it he was a guy so it wasn't like I had to wear a swimsuit in the bathtub like I did when a girl was babysitting. As you know most normal eight-year-old boys doesn't want to be seen naked by a girl. John was real polite and positive and told me that Eli, his girlfriend's brother who happened to be in my class, had already gotten ready for bed and so he wouldn't be taking a bath. It was just me. I didn't think much of it I was eight. John played with me tickled me in the tub made sure my hair was good and washed and told me he had to check my backside to make sure I was clean back there which I thought was strange. He then made sure that my privates were very clean and took the time to clean them which got my attention really quick. After that he told me to hop out. He wrapped me the towel and we went into my room. He helped me put my pajamas on. I told him I was a big boy & I didn't need that help. He told me “I know you're a big boy but that's okay I'm the babysitter, so you got to do what I say and I'm going to help you”.
I got dressed and it was still early so we went and watched a little TV. My sister being blind, deaf and having other mental health issues, was changed and put to bed early by him in her room. Then when we got done watching TV, he told us that I and Eli were going to lay in my bed for a while and we would all hang out. So we went into my bedroom. Once we got in there he decided that he wanted to teach me how to be a “big boy”.
I asked him what he meant, and he said that big boys make themselves and others feel good. It’s even better to other boys feel good, especially older boys.
I asked if Eli was a “big boy”.
John said “no, Eli is a little boy because he still wears diapers because he wets the bed.”
At that point he told Eli to pull his pajamas down and sure enough he had on very thick diapers and was already wet. John started to tease him a little bit about being a little boy or just a big baby.
John then said, “little boys only get to suck on a special pacifier because they're a big baby and don't get to feel good like big boys do..”
At that point John reached down and pulled my pj's down and said that I had a little dickie, almost baby size so it would be perfect for Eli to use this as pacifier. At that Eli started crying and said he don't want to suck it.
John told me that since Eli was a “little boy”, little boys only get a suck on pacifiers they don't get to do the rest of the fun things that big boys do. Now it was my turn to learn all those fun things. I was scared, and then John started fondling me. After a few minutes of that John told me he was going to show me where else a boys can feel really good, and since I had a baby dickie it is what would make me feel good. I was embarrassed with his saying I had a baby dickie, and I tried to complain, but he gave me a seat on the butt and told me to “behave or ELSE”. Now I was even more scared.
He told me to turn around, bend over and stick my butt out at him. I didn't know why he wanted to look at my butt, but I was scared to not do what he told me to do. He then took and ran his finger down my butt crack and said you got a nice bubble butt. Then he pulled my undies down to my ankles. Then I felt his finger trying to push into my butthole and I told him that was dirty and not to touch me there. He gave me a SWAT on my butt and said don't talk to him like that!
Then he told me “this is your little boy hole, and it will make me feel good and make many others feel good too.” He was going to teach me all about it. I looked at him scared and he had a weird look on his face and his tongue was licking his lips, like he was drooling over a special meal.
He then proceeded to go get some lotion and lube up my bottom with his fingers. After a couple minutes I told him it felt really weird. He reached around and noticed I had a little erection.
He says, “obviously you like it, that's why you're got a little boner”.
I felt really embarrassed and told him to stop. He said he was in charge and this is what big boys do to smaller big boys. If I want to be a big boy had to learn this or I would end up a lonely big baby. Since I had no older brothers that he was going to do me a favor and teach me.
Over the next 30-40 minutes he played with my bottom. I was also embarrassed because Eli was laying on the bed and watching everything happening to me. He had a look of interest, but also one of fear in his eyes. John had eventually gotten several fingers in me, as he kept telling me how much I liked it because I was hard the entire time.
He tried to penetrate me with his penis, but I screamed because it hurt so much. He told me to be a big boy and suck it up, and that the pain would be gone once he was in. He put his big dick at my butthole again and pushed but it hurt too much, and I was crying and screaming for him to stop.
He stopped and told me I wasn't ready for that just yet, but he would show me some other stuff. At that point he told me to lie down and watch what else I need to learn to do.
John told Eli to take off his pj’s, so he was only in his diaper. John told him he knew what to do and to watch his teeth. Eli nodded and John said it was time for Eli to suck on his dick or for Eli it’s his “special pacifier” because he was a little boy.
Eli started to cry a little bit, but John gave him a SWAT on the leg and said do it. So Eli took off his pajamas and sat there in his wet diapers. John told him to be a good little boy and ask for your pacifier. Eli looked like he was going to cry, but the then asked John if he could suck on his special pacifier.
John told him he was a good little boy and that he could stuck on the pacifier.
At that point John had Eli slide over on the end of the bed. John stood up and proceeded to put his hard-on into Eli's face. Eli then opened his mouth like he was taught to do. Then John started pushing his penis into it. John started making weird noises and told Eli to suck on his pacifier and use his tongue.
I couldn't believe what I was seeing but I also didn't really understand it. I wasn't sure what was really happening, but I just thought it was dirty. I realized I had an erection going again because when John tried to put it in my butt, my dickie went soft fast.
I felt like my body was betraying me because it wasn't supposed to be seeing stuff like this or liking it. But if I had a hard on. At that moment, John noticed I was stiff and told me I liked what I was seeing and wanted to try it. I was really confused.
After about 5- or 6-minutes John made a really weird noise and told Eli to swallow it all. I thought maybe he was peeing in his mouth. But after a few seconds I saw white stuff leak out the corner of his mouth. After maybe 20 sec. John let go of Eli's head and told him he did a really good job he was a good little boy.
Then he told me to lay totally flat on my back and Eli was going to show me how it felt to have my little baby boy dickie sucked on. I told him I didn't like being called a baby boy or baby boy dickie.
John said well you may be a big boy but your boner sure isn't. I've seen 4-year olds that have a bigger one. Then I started to cry a little bit. I felt hurt and betrayed.
Then all of a sudden I felt this weird feeling of wetness and warmth was all around my dickie. I looked at my classmate and he was sucking on me like he did to John. I later learned it was called a blowjob or BJ.
Eli was sucking on it with all the gusto he could. It felt really weird and really good but also kind of dirty at the same time. After a couple minutes I told him I had to go pee and John told me that I wouldn't pee it was my special feelings that I would get. To just go with it. I was scared because I did not want to pee in my bed. I couldn't take it anymore because I felt like I had to pee so bad. Then I just pushed Eli off me and ran to the bathroom. But, then I couldn't pee.
After the hard on went away I was able to pee and then I went back into my room. John yelled at me told me that I was supposed to let him continue sucking on to make me feel good. He then gave me a SWAT on my butt told me to get on the bed on my tummy. I did and Eli was next to the wall in just his diaper. John started putting his fingers in my butt again then all of a sudden he touched something give me that made my whole body shake and tingle. I had no clue what was going on, I was shaking, and my body was not in my control. John told me that's it I knew you were going to like this. Because my dickie was so small it meant my butt would be very sensitive. He also said he was going to make me get those special feelings again, and that I will enjoy it every time.
John said that it was time to get dressed and told me to just put my underwear on. Eli put his pj's back on, and his diaper bulge was even more noticeable now. Then we went back to the sofa and watched TV. John told me once we were on the sofa told me that this was boy stuff and not something that I need to tell anybody because I would get in trouble. I didn't want to get in trouble, so I never told anybody. I tried once but my mom never understood what I was trying to tell her when I said I wanted to be a little boy and wear diapers and not be a big boy because it hurts to be a big boy. Mom just told me that I was a big boy and sometimes it hurts when your growing up and you just got to deal with it and keep growing up.
While watching TV I heard a little noise and saw Eli moving his head up and down. John was playing with Eli's hair, while he was sucking on John's hard-on John moaned and told him swallow it like a good boy. I stared in awe.
That was all that happened that night. But I didn't know that the following weekend my parents were having John babysit again and this time it would just be John, my little sister, and me.
The next weekend he comes over Saturday afternoon about 3:00 pm. My parents are having to leave early because they were driving a ways. John was going to be spending the night. My parents would not be back until the early afternoon or so on Sunday.
My mom told me to “be a good boy and do whatever John says.” Off course John was there when she said it and he used that to his advantage the rest of the evening.
By 4:00 my parents had left, and we were watching a TV. Then John wanted to play cards.
As we were playing cards he told me that he was going to teach me some more fun stuff tonight. I told him I didn't really want to learn anything or do anything. He said, “too bad your mom said do what I tell you to do and you're going to do it”.
We had dinner around 5ish and after dinner he told me it was bath time. I told him I didn't take baths on Saturdays. He said too bad I'm telling you; you're taking a bath and you're going to get it now.
He filled the tub up and told me I can play in it, because he put bubbles in it for me. While I was in the bath, he got my sister changed put in her bed. After he was done with her, he came to check on me. I was pretty wrinkled he told me he was going to wash my hair for me. After that was done he decided he wanted to check the rest of me out and told me to stand up. When I did, he played with my genitals and made sure that they were clean and told me to bend over so he could check my bottom. I bent over and he told me my butt wasn't clean yet and so he was going to clean it.
He soaped up his hands and then after rubbing my butthole for a minute or so with his fingers all of a sudden he shoved one finger in me. It hurt and I was not expecting it. He told me just to suck it up.
He started moving his finger back and forth and around inside me and it started to felt pretty good. It stopped hurting and I noticed that I had another stiffy going. John did too and said, “see I knew you were going to like this.” Then he said, “You're going to really enjoy it when I take your butt.”
For probably 5 minutes or so he played with my butt with one finger. Then he told me just push out like you're taking a poop. As I did it, I felt something bigger slide in, so I think it was two fingers and it hurt again. I was getting cold bent over like that in the tub with now cool-cold water.
After I was clean to his satisfaction he told me to get out of the tub. He grabbed a towel and said, “okay Champ I'm going to towel you off.” From that point on he always called me “Champ”. I hated that name. As I got older, I always saw the sexual connotations with that name, “Champ.” John or the other boys he shared me with, only called me “Champ”, and that meant he was going to use me for sex stuff and normally hurt me and not care about me as a real person with feelings or emotions or anything else.
Luckily, nobody else called me that growing up. But it ended up costing me a relationship My Junior year in college because my girlfriend, called me” champ” as she was going to wash my back in the shower before we went out. I freaked out because I'd blocked everything out I didn't even understand why I freaked out. I went to my bedroom crying and locked the door. I told her to just leave and we could talk later. We were still friends, but my first relationship ended because of the abuse I suffered and suppressed.
So after he towels me off, he grabs and picks up my chubby frame. He carried me into my room and tosses me on my bed. I laugh and giggle. He tells me to “lay there for me and I'll be right back”. He went, grabbed his bag, and brought it into my room. He pulled out this tube of stuff and said he was going to check my butt now. As he did that he took the tube and put stuff on his finger. He started playing with my butthole. It felt really weird, but I got to a stiffy right away. He commented on it too. He told me to turn around and he was going to make it feel good for me. He started rubbing and playing with it. He still had his finger in my butt. Then all of a sudden he started sucking on it. I signed and then he pushed his 2nd finger in my butt. Then moving them around and making my butt hurt and but he touched something inside me again and it felt great. I was scared and had no where I could go. I was impaled on one end and held in place by his mouth giving me a blowjob.
All of a sudden I felt like I had to pee, and I told him, and he just kept sucking and play with my butt. He was pushing even harder with his fingers. I almost passed out as touched that special part of my body again and then my whole body just started to tingle. I just tensed up and I shook.
I didn't even realize that he had laid me down on the bed. He still had his fingers in me. I realized my butt now hurt again. He just pushed a third finger in, and he rolled me the rest the way on to my tummy. He said, “oh yeah this is going to be fun.” For probably the next 5 minutes he working those three fingers in until he could get them in fair enough without me grimacing and begging him to take them out.
He finally took his fingers out of my butt. He then told me crawl off the bed. I did as he stood up and told me that it was my turn to suck on his pacifier. I told him that I was a big boy He said that good big boys still suck on bigger boys pacifiers. I didn't want too. He said, “you're going to suck my dick you little shit”. That's when he grabbed my head put his penis to my mouth told me if I touched it with my teeth or tried to bit him, that he would hit me so hard I wouldn't wake up until after my parents got home, if ever. I was so scared because my parents weren't there, and he was babysitting me all night long until the next morning and I didn't know what to do.
He tried pushing it and I would not open my mouth. He then looked at me and said, “well if you're not going to pleasure me I know your sister will one way or the other”. He had an evil grin on his face. I could not let him hurt my little sister. She was handicapped and couldn't defend herself. I was the big brother, and it was my job to protect her. I think he knew that and used that against me.
So he looked at me and said, “it’s going to be you or her”. I started to cry and lowered my eyes in defeat. He said, “open your mouth” and I did. He then shoved his penis into it. I gagged on it real quick. I thought I was going to throw up and he just slapped me on the side of my head and said watch the teeth. I had tears running down my face and felt like I had no choice but to let him do whatever he wanted, and I resigned to comply to his requests/demands.
Over what seemed like an hour but was probably no more than 5 minutes he slowly worked the first couple inches of his penis into my mouth. He called me HIS cocksucker and said you do it so good so just keep sucking on it. I did not even realize I was sucking on I was just trying to breathe through my nose and that thing being my mouth and it was big and filling my entire mouth up. I could barely squeeze it in to my mouth and not rub my teeth on it. He told me to really start using my tongue on the tip of it and to suck on it like it was a bottle, or a pacifier, or my favorite lollipop. He reminded me that if I didn't he was going to hit me. Then I would have to watch as he did it to my sister. I looked up at him and just started using my tongue on it and did whatever he wanted.
After a couple minutes he started moaning and held my head really still and said I want you to swallow it all. I didn't know what he was talking about. Then all of a sudden some stuff started filling my mouth. I thought it was pee at first and I started panicking. He looked evilly at me and told me to swallow otherwise you're going to choke on it, and you'll die so swallow. I had no choice so I started swallowing what I could. It was coming out of my mouth dribbling down my chin and all over me.
He was laughing at me, and he had an evil laugh that really scared me. When he was done filling my mouth, he finally took it out. He a little rag to wipe my face off. A little had spilled onto my chest. He looked me in the eyes and told me I “was his good little cocksucker”. I was scared of him and just smiled so that he would not hurt me or my sister.
He said I was going to be doing that a lot for him from now on.
I was scared to death. I didn't like that, and I didn't want to do it. I was even more confused because he then said he knew I liked it and wanted to do it more because I got a stiffy from sucking on his cock. At that point I hated my body because it was betraying me. I didn't like the fact that I was overweight, and everyone teased me for it. But now my body had a mind of its own and was betraying me and I couldn't stand that. I hated myself and my body as much as I hated John, if not more.
I was mad & I was crying. I asked him why he peed in my mouth and he started laughing. He told me it wasn't pee it was his man juice. That it was really good for me because it was full of protein it would help me grow big and strong.
He said it's normal for big Brothers to teach little brothers to do this and that's how little brothers grow big. Since I didn't have any big brothers he was going to be my big brother now and teach me all this so I could grow bigger and stronger.
He then said that he would also help me so I could learn to be throw the ball better in baseball or football. Also how to catch the ball and then now I'm after school I can come over and hang out at his house listen to music with him and all that other fun stuff that he and his friends do because now I was going to be part of their group. He said if I could throw and hit the ball I would not be picked last for the teams. I hated to be picked last all the time, so that made me think it might not be too bad and worth it.
I was confused because I thought it would be really cool to be hanging out with him and older boys. But I didn't like what he just done to me. He told me that it was normal for boys to do it and that it was a boy thing, so it was no big deal. He was older than me, he was in high school, so I believed him. After he had me all cleaned up we went out watch TV. He had me only in my underwear, and he won't let me put anything else on. He had me sit on his lap. He had on a pair of shorts. As I sit in his lap, he started rubbing my thighs and working his hands up towards my privates. I could feel his hard on pushing into my butt. We snacked some more and then he said that it was time for some more fun now that we had extra energy. I asked him what do you mean?
He said, “I'm going to teach you how to actually use that butt of yours to make you and me happy.” He then said, “there's two ways to get my love juice. Your mouth is one way but the second way is even better for you and that's in your butt because its closer to your privates to help them grow bigger, and by the size of that baby dickie, you need as much as you can get in your butt as often as possible.”
He then said I bet the reason your dick is so small is because you've never done, and it means that you need lots of it.”
He looked me in the eyes and asked me, “do you like having a little baby dick or do you want to have a big boy dick?”
I said I didn't like having a baby one I wanted a big one because I'm a big boy.
He said, if I do what he tells me and get it lots of it his and his friends man love juice mine will grow big like his. At that point he pulled his shorts down and showed me his hard-on. To me it looked huge. Looking back it was probably only 6 or so inches, but it was also pretty thick. To me it looked huge, especially since mine was probably only 1-1.5 inches long when it was hard and not real thick at all I mean it was the size of a pinky. Even Eli's had been bigger than mine I found out later. John had showed me a Polaroid of Eli's and his was bigger than mine and so I felt really bad because if he was a little boy still wearing diapers and had a bigger one than I did that meant I really had a baby dick.
John went and checked on my little sister said she was fine. He told me to stand at the side of the bed so he could take off my underwear because that was something that big brothers do for the little brothers. I stood there and he took off my underwear. Then he played with my big butt. He told me “I like your butt it's going to be really nice and soft and feel great when I get in it. He was rubbing my butt, and I didn't know what he meant but I just said “okay.”
We crawled into my bed together and then he started rubbing his hands all over me. He was saying my skin was so soft. He kept reaching around with one hand and always rubbing it on my butt and the other hand would go on my tummy and my chest.
I knew my parents love me, but they didn't show me a lot of physical affection besides the hugs once a day. My sister got almost all the attention and the affection. By 6.5 years old, or so, I wasn't even able to sit on Dad's lap anymore. Maybe once a month I could snuggle with Mom on the sofa for 10-15 minutes but that was really about it.
He pulled me in close to him so that I was up against his chest and then I felt his hard on rubbing me in my butt, so I squirmed around a little bit, so it wasn't poking at me. It ended up coming right up between my legs. He reached down and chuckled. He said, “it looked kind of funny with my little baby dick there and his big cock next to it. There is such a big difference”
I felt really embarrassed and minuscule at that point. I think he realized that, as I was withdrawing so he put his arms around me into a big hug. He was rubbing my chest, it kinda tickled. He was telling me that I was special and that he cared about me.
He asked if I liked being held, snuggled, and cuddled. I told him yes.
He said you'll get lots of that too because that's what big brothers do for little brothers we hold you and make sure that you're nice and close when we love you. I was shocked when he said, “love you”.
I asked him if he really cared about me. He said, yes sweetie I will even show you tonight how much I love you. I didn't know what he meant then but found out the hard and painful way later.
He told me that he was going to make me his little lover. He told me I would get to that special feeling from him because he loves me.
After another 5 or 10 minutes of snuggling, while he was slowly rubbing his penis in between my legs, John told me that I needed to roll onto my tummy for a few minutes. He was going to show me how good the special feeling can be from just touching my butt.
I wanted to make him happy because I like being close to him and it made me feel good when he was holding me. So I did whatever he wanted. I was laying on my tummy, he then proceeded to play with my butthole again and start working his fingers into me some more for the next probably 10-15 minutes. He said he had three fingers in me. I said it hurt. I had some tears and was crying a little bit and he told me, I was a big boy so tough it up you WILL do this.
Then he said that if I didn't then I couldn't hang out with him and he would never show me how to do any other things that boys do and how to be good brother. I wanted to be a good brother for my little sister so I thought I could learn things from him on how to be a better big brother. At that point I made the commitment to give in and do whatever he told me to do.
He continue to play with my butt. He got it dilated but he was getting very forceful with it and every time I objected he would give me a SWAT on the butt and tell me that he knew what was best. He reminded me that my mom told me to be a good boy and do what he said so I needed to do it.
I wanted to make him happy even though it hurt I just kept biting down on the pillow or my tongue, lip whatever I had so I wouldn't make any loud noises as he kept pushing his fingers in and out.
It started to hurt less and then I realized that he had probably all three fingers into me is when he said I think you're ready to really learn what it feels like to make a big boy happy.
I didn't know what he meant until John pulled me up by my waist into, so I was on my hands and knees. I know now it’s the doggy style. He told me to stay just like that as I had my knees underneath me my head on the pillow.
Then he told me that he was going to give me his love juice AKA “cum” in the best way so I can absorb it and grow bigger.
He started rubbing more lotion or what I thought was lotion into my butt and I heard him also putting some it sounded like on himself, but I wasn't sure where because I wasn't looking. I had my head face down in the pillow and was just trying to deal with everything going on. I was kinda ready for him to put his fingers back into me, when he reached underneath and noticed I had an erection. He said, “oh you really do enjoy this don't you. Don't worry I will give you more to enjoy and we will do it all the time.”
I was even more upset at my body because I was scared more than anything and didn't know I had a stiffy going. At that point he told me to bury my face deep in the pillow and if it hurt or anything to keep my face in the pillow and not to move. I could cry or yell into the pillow, but he didn't really want to hear anything.
Then John put the head of his penis at my young little virgin butthole. He told me that to push out when I felt the pressure. To push like I was taking the biggest poop ever otherwise it was going to hurt really bad. As he started to put the pressure on my virgin butt hole it hurt too much, and I pulled away from him which really upset him!!! John gave me a very hard smack on the butt and said don't do that again or ELSE! The look on his face and is eyes told me not to move again or I would really suffer.
Then he said that if I were too much of a sissy, he would do it my sister. And that would mean was bigger, braver, and tougher than I was.
He sure knew how to push an 8-year-old's button because you don't tell an 8-year-old boy that his 5-year-old sister is bigger tougher and better than he is.
John could see the look of my face that I was determined then to prove him wrong that I was not some little sissy. I knew that it was going to hurt and would hurt her even more. I did not want him to hurt my sister. At the same time if what he had said was true and it would help make me grow bigger and stronger and have a bigger thingy (as I had called it, or stiffy) then it would be good in the long run so it might be worth it.
I got back in a position put my face in the pillow and stuck my butt at him, knowing that it was going to hurt but that I had to do this.
It was the most pain I've ever felt in my life, over the next 30 seconds. He grabbed me by the hips. I felt this big thing pushing at my butthole and all of a sudden I had this giant searing pain as I screamed. He grabbed my head and pushed it back down into the pillow and told me to “just take it.” I was crying my eyes out. He told me I was a good boy, and that he had the tip in and that that was the hardest part.
He then said “WOW, you are so tight! That's the best pussy I've ever had.” Being 8 I had no clue what he meant when he said pussy. We had shown dogs and I thought the female dog had a pussy, so I was confused but never really understood it at that point. Later on he then explained what he meant when I asked him when we were all done why he said I had a pussy.
At least he was somewhat kind and went semi-slow. Every time he pushed in a little bit probably couple of 1/2 of an inch or an inch I would tense up and start crying a little more again. It really hurt and I felt betrayed. I hurt bad for probably 5-10 minutes. Then one last push and pain and then I felt his pubic hair on my butt. John then told me that he was all in and now the fun was going to come.
He then proceeded to go back and forth real slow at first and then speed up just taking a little bit out and then back in and then all of a sudden he started going harder and harder with more of it. It really started to hurt bad and I was crying again.
He then told me that I was acting more like a sissy than a boy. If I was a big boy I should just tough it up and take it. He said this “was good for me and will make me a better and stronger boy, and that he will give me a lot of practice to get used to it.”
This lasted for what seemed like hours but was most likely no more than 5 minutes after he started to pound my butt. Then he pushed in as hard as he could and pulled me back into him and said I'm cumming.... I felt him shoot his sperm in my butt.
I now understand what that was, at the time I had no clue all I know is he grabbed me by the waist really tight pushed in really hard and told me he to enjoy it.
After I was done with my crying and just staying still as he was still in me, he told me “see you liked it. You should thank me for giving you my man love juice and making you a Big Boy now.”
I didn't say anything at first, so he gave me a SWAT on the back the head and said I didn't hear you. So I lifted in my head off the pillow and said, “thank you for giving me your love juice, thank you for making me a big boy.”
He had a very evil smile going and said, “you're welcome I'll give it to you as often as I can.”
He started to soften, and he pulled out.
I started to move and wanted to get dressed. He took my underwear away from me and told me to not move. I was scared.
Probably 30 seconds later he returned with toilet paper and wiped me down a little bit and shoved into my butt. I asked him why he did that he said this way it'll keep his love juice in me, and I won't make a mess.
At this time it was still early so John said we were going to watch TV. I reached for my underwear he said, “nope you can't have those yet”. It felt really weird to be walking around naked. Especially because he put his underwear on, and I was the only one naked.
As we were watching TV later on he reached down and started playing with my penis and told me that was a good boy and that one day if I kept doing that this my penis would grow bigger like his. He then took it out from his underwear and showed it to me. He stuck it right in my face and it was getting hard.
He then gave me a choice of either taking his love juice in my mouth or my butt again.
He said he was ready to give me my next dosage. I was scared!!! My butt still hurt, and I think John realize that when he looked at me. So instead of letting me choose, John just grabbed the back of my head and started pushing it toward his cock. When it touched my lips, and I didn't open my mouth. He swatted me in the back to head again and said, “take it you know you want it, or else your tight pussy will get it again.”.
Well we were laying there watching TV he made me suck him off, and work as much of it as he could in my mouth and tried to get it in my throat. When he came he pulled it back just so the tip was in my mouth. He told me to swallow it all and if I spilled it I'd have to lick it up.
I wasn't well trained yet, as he would keep teaching me, so I couldn't swallow it that well and I made a mess. When he was done coming he gave me a SWAT on the butt said I made a mess and I had to clean it up and in doing that he then stretched out and told me to lick it all up. I had to lay there and lick his entire crotch and penis up to make sure there was no cum anywhere.
I felt degraded and miserable at that point realizing that I had to do whatever he told me to do. Not only because he was older than me but also my mama told me to do whatever he said.
I fell asleep on the sofa with him and woke up in my bed the next morning with him snuggled next to me. I still had nothing on. I went to the bathroom because I had to go pee and maybe more. I was not sure. So I sat on the toilet. I was scared really bad when I sat down thinking would be full of blood when I went to the bathroom... I was relieved that after making a lot of weird farting noises and trying to be able to go number two I didn't have a lot of blood in the toilet. Actually there was basically none there was a couple little red spots in my poop. I wasn't sure if it was blood or anything else. I was sure that my butt still hurt and hurt when I went poop and wiped it.
After my butt was clean and I flushed, I just felt like I needed to cry. I sat back down on the toilet and started crying. I guess John had moved or somehow woke up and heard me crying in the bathroom, so he came in and asked me what was wrong, and I told him that my butt hurt. He said, “you'll get used to it will stop hurting after the first couple times, so by next weekend it will just feel good and be fun”. I looked at him and was scared as what he said soaked in...
He then said, it was not quite breakfast time, yet we should go back into bed and he would hold me and cuddle me, and I'd feel better that way. So I agreed.
We went into my bedroom he laid down and put his arms out and I kind of crawled up into his arms. He held me and that felt really good.
He started running his hands all over my body again and even gave me a kiss on my neck and said that I was so cute. I didn't think I was cute I thought I was fat. Only my mom or grandma had ever called me cute so now I was blushing and kind of Happy.
We laid there and I fell back asleep. Only to awaken to pressure in my butt again. John now had me laying on my stomach while he was working his fingers into my butt, getting me all lubed up for my next penetration.
John said I needed more of his love juice, so I'd go big and strong and that he was going to give it to me the best way possible. Also this way it wouldn't interfere with my breakfast.
He said he was going to go a little slower this time and see if I would get a special feeling. I didn't know what he was talking about, so I just kind of nodded my head. When he told me to get into position on my knees, I did and put my face into my pillow.
It hurt!! My butt was already burning some before, he started to put anything in me. But it didn't quite hurt as much as it did the first time.
He took his time and was a little gentler. All of a sudden I started to get some weird feelings going inside me.
He reached down, felt that I had an erection and told me that I was liking it and that I wanted it! Now I was going to be his little lover because that's what I wanted, needed, and my body wanted.
He was going to make me grow big and strong. I felt really confused because I didn't think boys were lovers. Back in the 70s that was a bad thing , I did not want to be called a fag, faggot or gay. Because that was the worst thing you could be.
It's took who knows, 20- 30 minutes as he proceeded to mount me hardcore. He brought me to my first orgasm. I about passed out. He told me that since I got it without touching my dickie it meant I was a bottom boy and needed to have other boys dicks in my butt, I was confused by that and the strange feelings I was getting from my butt with him in it.
I had my second orgasm when he was working me hard and he came hard in me.
John told me that that was really special and that meant we were bonded together.
He told me that he had now breed me and made me his lover, and since I got my special feeling (orgasm) when he got his it was more special and that I really loved him doing it to me.
I give him a weird look and he said don't worry about it just means that you love me being in your butt, and I will give you lots of love, and help you grow big and strong.
He cleaned me up and put more tissue in my butt. He let me put on my underwear. We had breakfast, and then he told me to go try to go poop. He walked into the bathroom with me and gently rubbed my head as I tried to go poop and make all kinds of farting and spurting noises. After about 5 minutes I said I could not go anymore. He told me to stand up, so he could clean my butt. He got a washcloth wet with warm water and cleaned my butt very well. He said I looked fine there, and that he would check it tomorrow when I come over to play catch.
I pulled up my undies and said, “ play catch?” He said yep, I want you to come over every day after school, and when you can on weekends and we will play catch, or football or even card games. Your my special friend and like a little brother to me, so now you need to come over and hang out with me. I'll introduce you to my friends and you can hang out with all of us. I felt really special now being able to hang out with these teens. Little did I know that it also came at a price, not just to John, but they got help make me grow bigger to, as John would tell me.
_________________ End Part 1______________________
I hope you liked this true story of what happened to me and how I learned about sex. The next part will go over some of the events that occurred over the next 2 years with John's friends and even some of their little brothers too. I might talk about how it has affected me in my adult life also, so that those who were not used and abused, can see how it can affect a boy and do so for the rest of his life.
Please remember, looking is fine, fantasizing is great, but NEVER harm a boy and take away that innocence, as it can never be replaced.
I have been asked by a few friends and a person at my old therapy group, a question. If I had not been forced, used, and hurt by John, and instead if it had been a kind, caring and loving relationship, how would I have felt. .. I will answer that in the conclusion of this story. So you got to read on.
This is my first story. My background is more science, and not this type of writing. I would love to hear feedback. If I get enough positive feedback on this and the next part, I might write more stories. I wrote this to help me deal with the demons I still have from what he did to me, and to educate others as to how hurting and using a boy has lifelong affects.
I also want to thank a bunch of authors I have talked with over the last month. You have encouraged me to write this, as have your kind, caring and loving stories. SO Thank you! This especially goes out to Knottedpup (Matties New Life is AWESOME!!!!)) ; (EricH (so many great stories for over 15yrs! Tutoring JJ, is a classic) , and the wonderful authors of: Founders School for Boys (and at The Ranch ); I DIDNT PEE THE BED ; and Boy Scout Baby Sitter ). You and everyone else that shares their stories on here, I want to say, : THANK YOU!
You can send positive feedback at dldaddy2020@yahoo.com
Thanks to everyone that helped me REFORMAT this!!
Your all AWESOME!!!!!
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