Chapter Twenty-Three
JJ slumped in his chair, slipped off his
sandals, and wiggled his toes into the microfiber area rug.
"Care to tell me your recollection of events?"
"He came over, we did your assignment, and it
got boring asking each other questions, so I suggested we play Never Have I
Ever. That turned into Truth or Shots, and next thing I know, he's going in for
a kiss. Then he backs away like I smacked him or something, and the kid's
ghost."
"Hmm," Dr. Dull said when JJ had
finished. "And what made you think it was a good idea to introduce alcohol into
the mix?"
"I thought it would loosen him up, and we'd
have a good time."
"Why was that important?"
He faltered, then managed, "I wanted him
to like me."
Dr. Dull nibbled on his pen cap and scribbled
on a legal pad. "It's important that people like you?"
"I don't know. I guess?"
"Which is it?"
"Yeah, okay. I want people to like me so that
. . . so that I won't be alone."
Dr. Dull scribbled on his legal pad. "So, you
don't have many friends?"
"Tons, but they only like me because of all my
stuff and the parties I throw, and `cause I'm funny. If they knew the real me,
then they'd . . ."
"What?"
"Never mind."
"No, finish your thought."
"They'd hate me and wouldn't want me around."
"Okay, and who is the real you you're afraid
they won't like?"
"I'm a geeky, dorky, spaz who likes DnD,
sci-fi, and fantasy. And I'm . . ."
"Joshua, it's all right. You're in a safe
space."
A serious look came over JJ. "You promise you
won't repeat what I'm about to tell you to anyone, even my parents?"
Dr. Dull smiled. "Yes."
"I'm gay, and I'm so in love with Travis that
it hurts."
Without meaning to, JJ revealed everything
about how he'd bullied Travis to be close to him and how he'd been stalking him
for months. Afterward, he felt lighter than air but scared shitless.
"What should I do?"
"That's up to you to decide. However, I will
say this: if you hope to have a relationship with Travis, platonic or
otherwise, then you must be honest with him."
"And what if he doesn't want to be with me?"
"That's a risk you must take. 'Tis better
to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all."
"That's about as true as fat bitches loving
salads."
"I'm not saying you must tell Travis about
your feelings for him this instant, but you should consider doing it before you
fall further for him, only to discover he's not interested."
"Yeah."
"And promise me you'll stop going by his house
and watching him without his consent. I think we're done for today. If you'd
like to continue one-on-one sessions with me, I have an open slot Mondays from
5-6PM?"
"I'd like that."
Dr. Dull added him to his schedule and gave
him his business card.
***
On the ride home, JJ had much to think about.
What was more important to him: honesty or losing the boy he loved? He didn't
know how Travis felt about him, and after today, he wasn't even sure if he
wanted to be with him. But some part of his heart still swelled with joy at the
thought of them kissing. His busted lip, however, reminded him Travis was a
threat, and there was no telling what he might do if he found out the truth.
No, JJ would hold off confessing his feelings until he knew Travis's feelings
for him.
When his uber pulled up at the entry to his
house, he spotted Marianna talking with a delivery person in clipped Spanglish.
"It's okay, Marianna. I ordered the pool."
"The piscina is yours?"
"Si, Si. But you have to sign for it, firmar,"
he said, miming signing. She nodded and signed the tablet, and the delivery
person unboxed the pool. When she was done, he emailed several pool companies to
get quotes for setting it up and maintaining it. That done, he went inside to
eat. Then he read comics until he fell asleep.
The next morning, he was awakened by his
parents' homecoming. "You simply must breakfast with us," his mother said with
a slight slur.
"I can't. I have to get ready for community
service."
She pursed her lips. "Nonsense. You can do
that another time. Shower, dress in your formal attire, and meet us in twenty
minutes so we can have a family meal at the country club. And do something
about that lip of yours."
JJ rolled his eyes. Great, a day spent
listening to them schmoozing people, then off to the junior members' lounge to
hear an army of entitled brats complain about how their parents got them the
2016 Bugatti Chiron instead of the 2017. Fun.
JJ washed, then put some concealer on his lip
and reported for duty, sporting his tailor-made black Armani suit with matching
Italian leather Oxfords. He rode shotgun while his mother lunged in the back,
sprawled on the bench seat. As soon as he was in the car, his mother started in
on him. "I noticed you ordered a pool. Why?"
"Well, Mom. It's the middle of summer, we're
in a heatwave, and since you won't allow me to get AC installed, a pool is the
next best thing." He sighed loudly.
His father glared at him. "Don't use that tone
with your mother. We gave you that credit card, and we can take it away."
Whatever. It's not like you care about
me anyways. "Yes, sir. Sorry, Mom."
"That's better," his father said, then
proceeded to lecture him on all the networking and internships he'd miss out on
this summer due to his `silly' fight.
"If you ask me," his mother said, "they
shouldn't allow his type at AP Prep."
JJ whipped around and gave his mom
stink eye. "And what's that supposed to mean?"
Sighing, his father said, "Son, do we have to
get into one of your social justice arguments? You know your mother meant his
being poor, not his racial heritage."
Seeing his chance to one-up his father, JJ
said, "Ha! Shows what you know. Travis's grandmother is Helena Aurum."
His mom laughed. "Dear, don't believe
everything you're told. I've met Ms. Aurum, and there's no way that Turner boy
comes from her stock."
He wanted to retort, but they'd arrived at the
country club.
***
Breakfast dragged on. What time
his parents weren't networking or on their phones, they spent grilling him on
his plans to make up for this summer.
"I'll look up internships, extracurricular
camps, and college courses to take when I get home."
"You do that," his dad said, taking a bite of
his bagel and lox.
His mom finished her glass of champagne and
ordered another. "I trust you've cleaned your room per our last discussion?"
He wanted to roll his eyes but knew that would
only earn him another lecture, so he counted to ten mentally until the urge to
cuss her out passed. "Yeah, Mom. And if you don't believe me, you can see it
when we get home."
"We'll both examine your room," his dad sad.
"Now, why don't you go mingle with the other kids?"
Nodding, he trudged to the junior members' lounge.
Upon entering, all eyes turned to him.
"Looks like the jailbird escaped," Adolfo
said, and the others joined him in laughing at JJ.
"Must be tough slumming it with the plebs,"
Kimiko said. "I'd rather kill myself than be stuck slinging soup all summer."
God, how he hated them. Adolfo and Kimiko
ruled the junior members' lounge. Adolfo's father was a Spanish entrepreneur
who'd invested in Google and Amazon early. Kimiko's father was a former yakuza
boss--which Kimiko constantly reminded them of--who used his money to come to the
US, where he started an import/export company that trafficked in gray market
items.
JJ answered their stupid questions about
whether he had a probation officer and if he'd dropped the soap.
If these are the future leaders of the
free world, we're screwed. For the love of Kami, I'd rather be anywhere but
here.
He was contemplating strangling Adolfo
with his tie when a server came on the intercom system and told them JJ's
parents needed him as they had to leave ASAP. Fear quickening his steps, he
rushed back to the dining room, where his parents looked crestfallen.
"Dear," his mom began as she scribbled her
signature on the bill, "we just received an emergency call from our people in
Dubai. The deal we were working on fell through, and we have to leave
immediately to begin renegotiations. Sorry."
Typical. They're not home one full day and are
leaving again? Forcing a smile, he said, "No problem. We can spend time
together when you get back."
"That's the spirit, Joshy," his dad said and
hugged him, pulling away almost as soon as he'd embraced JJ. The ride back was
full of their promises to make this up to him, but he ignored them, going
through the motions as they said their goodbyes.
Once his parents were gone, he returned emails
with the pool places and had a guy out that day. The tech filled the pool, put
in chlorine tablets, and told him the process for maintaining the pool's pH and
cleanliness.
"Can't I hire you to do all that?" he said,
and the tech smiled, whipping out price charts. It wasn't his money, so JJ went
with the platinum package, which included weekly cleanings and pH balancing.
When the tech was done, he told JJ to give it a day for the chlorine to evenly
mix into the water since the pool was so large. With that done, he called up
his friends to organize the pool party. He told them not to invite anyone as he
wanted it to be a small group, and he'd supply the food if they supplied the
drinks. Jason said his older brother could score them beers and wine coolers
for the girls.
While he'd promised Dr. Dull to go easy on the
alcohol, what harm could a few drinks cause?
***
He was scrubbing dishes at St. Michael's
when he caught Travis giving him weird looks. "Dude, what's your damage?" he
shouted when it worked his last nerve.
"Nothing," Travis said, dumping a stack of
dirty dishes on the counter.
"Then why do you keep side-eyeing me?"
"No need for dramatics. I was merely curious
as to why you weren't here yesterday."
An ember of hope flared in JJ's heart.
"Miss me, huh?" he said, quirking an eyebrow.
"Not hardly. Thanks to your bailing, I had to
pull double duty. You're welcome."
"God, you're such an ass. Go already."
Travis shrugged and went back to the front,
returning a few minutes later with more dishes. When JJ saw them, he went off.
"There's no way I can wash all those before my shift ends."
"That's why Joan wants me to help you. I wash
half, you do the other?"
Sighing, JJ nodded. "FYI, my lip's feeling
better, no thanks to you."
Travis started washing a pan and mumbled
something.
"What?"
"I said . . . I'm sorry."
JJ didn't say anything and continued drying
his pan.
"You don't look half-bad. Your lip, I mean,"
Travis added hastily.
They worked in silence, and the
whole time, JJ wondered what he saw in Travis. He's such a jizz
rag, but he did apologize. And it was totes wrong of me not to let them know I
wasn't coming in. Maybe I should apologize?
"I'm sorry for bailing on ya. My parents made
me go with them to the country club and wouldn't take no for an answer. Then
they ditched me to go back overseas for who knows how long."
"Right," Travis said, adjusting his Ray-bans.
"You know parents are the worst. They treat us like objects instead of persons
with our own personalities and ambitions."
JJ nodded. "Exactly. From the moment we're
born, they tell us we're the future, and then they treat us like crap."
"Preach it!" Travis said, and they laughed.
Wiping sweat from his face, JJ continued, "I'm
more than old enough to make decisions about my life, thank you very much, Mom
and Dad. They give me all the responsibilities of being an adult with none of the
rights and privileges. How's that fair?"
"It's not. Like you said, we're the future,
yet now that our time has come, they won't step aside."
"Exactly! They had their shot and screwed up
the world. Now they have the nerve to expect us to clean up their mess. Talk
about entitled. The least we should get out of the deal is power." The more JJ
talked, the angrier he got.
"A lion doesn't ask permission to roar,"
Travis said as he scrubbed a plate.
JJ looked at him sideways. "Huh?"
"Power cannot be given. It must be
taken."
Smiling, JJ said, "The Godfather III?"
"Bingo. Our generation has limitless
potential, and that scares the old guard. They're set in their ways, content
with the status quo. If we want change, then we must crack the world asunder
and remake it in our own image."
JJ looked at Travis, awed . . . and a bit
scared if he was honest with himself. "Bro, you're eloquent AF. You should
legit become a politician."
Travis frowned. "One, telling a person of
color they're eloquent isn't a good look. Two, I have neither the time nor
inclination to bother with that."
JJ covered his mouth with his hands. "Shit,
man. I didn't mean to offend you. I just meant you speak well, and I could
listen to you talk all day."
JJ's face flushed, and he wanted to crawl in a
hole and die.
Travis laughed. "Josh, you are something
else."
Looking up, JJ wondered what Travis meant.
"Um, do you like me--I mean like talking with me?"
Scrunching up his face, Travis replied, "I
don't not like talking with you."
It's a start, I guess.
JJ looked at the floor, mustering
up his courage to form the words caught in his throat. "So, they finally
delivered my pool and set it up. It'll be ready tomorrow. D-do you want to come
to the party this Friday?" he said.
Travis looked at him for a second. "I'm
grounded, remember?"
JJ's heart threatened to burst from
disappointment. He wanted to fall into the center of the Earth. "Okay. I
guess--"
"But I'll swing by if I can."
JJ smiled wide. "Look at you, breaking the
rules."
"You're a bad influence on me."
"Oh, you just don't know," he said, wiggling
his eyebrows.
Travis smiled wryly. "You're vexing but oh so
intriguing, Joshua Joseph Giovanni."
He remembered my full name? Now I can
die happy.
Before JJ could ask Travis what he meant
by that, Joan told them it was almost time for them to leave. They still had a
few dishes to go, but working together, they knocked them out and went to get
their timesheets signed.
"Later," Josh said as they parted
ways. Travis nodded and smiled, and a warmness filled JJ's chest.
***
After lying in bed awhile, JJ had called up
the Squad and David and Jason; he put them on a conference call, and they set
their squad goals for the day.
Since it was supposed to be in the high
nineties that day, they would chillax in JJ's pool, listen to music, and catch
up. Marianna had the day off, so they were on their own when it came to food.
They settled on pizza from Little Caesars: one vegetarian pie for Rachel and
Brianna, meat lovers for the men, and a cheese pizza for David. That settled,
they ended the call to get ready.
JJ cleaned the house a bit, but the whole time
his mind was on Travis. Would he come? And if he did, how would his friends react?
At a quarter to five, he slumped on the couch,
sweat-drenched, red-faced, panting. Even with the industrial fans going and all
the windows open, it felt like he was vacationing on the Sun. He was so tempted
to use his credit card to have an AC unit installed. But he could already hear
his parents lecturing him about wasting money. The way they acted, you'd have
thought they were poor or something. Granted, they weren't Helena-Aurum rich,
but then, most people weren't.
He still couldn't believe his Travis was heir
to the Cadmus Fortune. Hell, with that much dough, Travis could've had him iced
1,000 times over, but he didn't act like any of the rich kids JJ's parents
forced him to network with.
And that was one of the reasons he liked
Travis. JJ could be himself around Travis without worrying about being cool or
bringing shame to the Giovanni name. There were no games with him. If Travis
thought something was dumb or boring, he said so. None of the
passive-aggressive gossip and backstabbing that was common with the kids at the
country club or the functions his parents made him attend.
Brianna's squeaky voice coming over the
intercom interrupted his thoughts. He checked his smartphone; they were twenty
minutes early.
After buzzing them in, he led the girls to the
guest room while he, Lance, David, Jason, and Henry changed into shorts. He
couldn't help sneaking a peek at them and was happy that he wasn't the smallest
in the room.
Once dressed, they marched to the pool, and
Henry did a cannonball off the ladder, soaking the girls.
Rachel shot him a scathing look. "Boy, you
know how long it's gon' take me to fix this?"
"Why'd ya come to a pool party if you didn't
want to get wet?"
"I can't even . . . ooh!"
JJ got between them, which wasn't an easy
feat, with Henry outweighing him by at least fifty pounds. "This is a
drama-free zone. Henry, if you can't stop being a dick, then GTFO."
Henry raised his hands. "Who threw sand in
your vag?"
He ignored the dis. "All I'm saying is stop
being such a jerkass all the time."
Lance laughed. "Someone's on his period."
JJ cupped his nuts. "Both of you can suck it."
Henry's laughter died in his throat, and he
glared at JJ. "We was joking. Damn, we haven't seen you all summer, and you
acting hella petty."
"You can eat a bag of dicks. And FYI, I've
been blowing up your cells, but you've been ignoring me. Or did you forget
that?"
Jason stepped between JJ and Henry. "Jesus,
guys. It ain't that serious."
David nodded. "Jason's right. Ya'll are acting
like this is one of those dumb preteen dramas Asher and Shari watch. We're all
friends here, so chillax."
Henry's face contorted like he'd eaten a
mouthful of Sour Patch Kids. "He started it."
Brianna cut in. "Girls, you're both pretty.
Now, are we gonna enjoy this pool or what?"
JJ looked from her to Henry, then stuck out
his hand. "We cool?"
Hesitating a moment too long, Henry slapped
palms with him. "We're cool."
He nodded, and a splash war commenced, the
girls and Jason against the others. David sat out because his leg was still in
a cast. And though Rachel complained about her hair, she got into the action.
A few hours passed, and they decided to grab
dinner.
JJ snagged the keys to his father's jag and
drove the three blocks to the pizza parlor. Usually, he hated any pizza that wasn't
made by a fellow full-blooded Italian, but he'd make do for the sake of his
friends.
At seven, Lance left, saying he had to clean
his room. Henry followed soon after, excusing himself to work out, and David
and Jason left shortly thereafter.
When it was only the three of them, the mood
changed.
Brianna and Rachel kept shooting each other
looks until finally, Rachel said she had to go water her neighbor's plants. No
sooner had she gone than Brianna pounced on JJ, her lips crashing into his.
What the actual fuck?
He pulled away. She stared at him, mouth
gaping, eyes like UFO's, confusion all over her face. "Don't you like me?"
"It's not you . . ."
"Then what? Is there another girl? Cuz I'll
cut a bitch. For real, for real."
He hesitated a moment. Should he tell her the
truth? Swallowing a lump in his throat, he said, "Another guy, actually."
She laughed, but when he didn't join in, she
stopped. "You serious?"
He nodded.
"Who is he?"
"Travis Turner."
"Oh," she said, and that single syllable
conveyed so much pain.
"Are you mad?"
"I'm so beyond mad, they have to invent a new
word. How could you not tell me this?"
Fear and worry that she might out him to the
others sprang up inside him. "I didn't know how."
"No, I mean, how could you think it would
matter to me? You like guys? Big whoop."
He smiled. "We're cool?"
"Yup. Though your taste in guys sucks."
"Bitch," he said, and they shared a
gut-busting laugh until they had tears rolling down their cheeks.
"Let's not tell the others just yet, okay?"
"Deal. And if Matthew or Henry give ya any
crap, let me know, and I'll kick their ass. Real talk."
They hugged, and she apologized for kissing
him. As he cleaned up the mess from the party, he couldn't help smiling. Things
were awesome . . . so that could only mean they wouldn't last.