Chapter Twenty-Nine

Travis glared at Josh's retreating form.

That moronic, maladjusted midget. He said he wouldn't leave me alone, and there he goes, off for who knows how long this time.

"Travis, why are you mopping?"

He about jumped out his skin at Oblivion's words. What do you want?

 "Merely to remind you of the ticking clock. You only have a short while left, yes?"

Yeah, so?

"So, forget Josh and have some fun. There are plenty of drinks and mates of either sex from which to choose."

Technically, that should be `of either gender.' However, gender is a socially constructed spectrum--

"Are you going to lecture me on the finer points of political correctness, or are you going to, as the kids say, do it up big?"

Travis smiled. You're right. Screw Josh. 

He made his way through the crowd to the table where drinks were laid out, and picking one at random, he downed it and winced, then downed another.

"Slow down, dude. You're gonna hurl."

He turned at the sound of the mellifluous voice, ready to tear the speaker a new one when he was struck by her all-black garb. 

"You don't look like the type to be at a place like this," he said, giving her a once over. He took in her combat boots, corset, leather micro-mini, fishnet stockings on her arms and legs, and lipstick.

She flashed him a wry smile. "Usually, I wouldn't be caught dead in a den of such idiocy, but my cousin convinced me to tag along with her, then bailed on me."

"Same. My soon-to-be ex-friend said he wouldn't leave me and has spent the whole night blowing me off to hang with his other friends."

She pursed her pouty lips, shaking her head. "That's a violation of rule one of the friend code. Leave no friend behind."

He chuckled. "I know, right? I'm Travis, by the way." He stuck out his hand, and she shook it. 

"My legal name's Ashley, but I go by Raven. Aren't you going to ask me why I'm wearing all black?"

"If I were to guess, it's to symbolize the omnipresence of death and how we're all hurtling toward the great abyss."

Her mouth hung open, and then she snickered. "I didn't take you for a goth."

"I abhor labels. But if you press me on my philosophical underpinnings, then, while I empathize with the Goth ethos, I'm more an anti-natalist, Nietzschean Nihilist, with shades of Secular Humanism."

Raven gave him a half-smile. "In other words, kids suck, and everything's pointless, but we should try to make the best of things while we're here?"

"Basically. Want to sit and talk about it?"

She sipped her drink, her pale-faced scrunched up. "It beats standing around listening to this shite."

Travis snagged another drink, and they made their way to the couch, which, given the number of people at the party, he was surprised to find empty.

After discussing Nietzsche's concept of the Uber Mensch, during which Travis bragged about reading Beyond Good and Evil in the original German, they moved on to the purgatory that was middle school.

"I can't wait until I'm old enough to drop out. The whole education system is just a racket to indoctrinate us into becoming brainless worker drones for the capitalist machine," Raven said, pausing to vape, her sandy-blonde hair falling in her face.

"True, though learning itself is a worthy endeavor that we should strive to continue all our lives, short as they may be." He took a sip of his drink and made a sour face as the next song started. "Whoever chose the music has awful taste."

"I know, right? I've been trying to hack into the Spotify station all night, but no luck."

Travis racked his mind, trying to remember whose house this was. 

Nolan, something. James? Johnson? Graham? That's it!

 He told her to input Nolan's name, but that wasn't it. Next, they tried, "NolanRulez." Nope. Then they tried, "NolanRulez!"

"I'm in," she said. "Now let's play something that doesn't make me nauseous." 

She selected Disposable Teens by Marilyn Manson, an oldie but goodie, and they bopped their heads, singing along.

Raven laughed, her hazel eyes sparkling. "Didn't take you for a Manson fan."

"If it's angry, anti-establishment, and has a good beat, I like it."

She smiled and stood. "Shall we show these sheeple how it's done?"

Travis looked from her to the dance floor. "I guess--" 

He barely had time to down his drink as she pulled him to the dancefloor, her body mashing into his as he tried not to make a fool of himself. She held him close and said, "Relax." He relaxed his shoulders, calming the ball of nerves in his chest, and got into it, gyrating along with her.

 When the song ended, all eyes were on them, but he didn't care. Travis had her cue up Beautiful People and shared a smile with Raven as they danced. Raven's body ground against him as he stood there in shock. It felt good, but he couldn't help thinking he was betraying Josh. But Josh had abandoned him, so he went with it and ground his crotch into hers; his head bobbed to the baseline as she grabbed his ass, pulling him closer.

When the song ended, he wiped the sweat from his brow and tried to catch his breath. "That was fun."

"Yeah," she said, then looked down and giggled. He followed her gaze and wanted to die. 

He tried laughing it off, commenting it was due to her sensuality. Raven smiled and queued up another song when a blond boy with cornrows stepped onto the dancefloor and shouted to get everyone's attention. "Yeah, let's listen to something not on the school-shooter playlist."

He put on a slow song, and when Raven tried to change it, she told Travis someone had changed the password. His face fell as disappointment washed over him. "So much for that."

"We can still dance, even if the music's crap."

Why not?

Taking her hand, he wrapped his other arm around her waist, and she did the same, her breath warm against his skin.

"I like you," she said, then kissed him full on the lips.

Part of him felt he should stop this, but the larger, drunker part of him said, "Fuck it," and he kissed her back.

Raven's lips were smoother and softer than he'd expected, and she wasn't shy about taking charge, grabbing his hands and placing them on her breasts.

He was edging his way down her back when he heard a familiar voice.

"What the actual fuck?" Josh yelled, storming up to them and grabbing Travis's arm.

"What's your problem?" Travis said, slurring his words.

"You. Me. Outside. Now!"

He looked to Raven, who shrugged.

"Be right back," he said, then followed Josh behind the house, where a few people were smoking a joint.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Josh said when they were a safe distance away from the others.

Travis scrunched up his face, confused. "I was having a little fun like you told me to."

"You call making out and feeling-up that girl a little fun?"

Face warming with rage, Travis raised his voice. "Why are you getting mad? You left me alone after you said you wouldn't."

"I can't believe you right now."

"What? Jealous much?"

Josh grunted. "You're so full of shit right now."

People were starting to shoot them looks, and Travis had about reached his drama limit for the night. "Maybe you shouldn't have abandoned me."

Josh threw his hands up in the air. "I can't even with you right now. You put on this big act like your heart's made of stone, but I know the truth."

He got in Josh's face, their noses touching. "And what's that, Giovanni?"

"Your heart's made of glass, and you're so scared of it getting broken, you push everyone away."

"Since when did you care so much about whom I kiss?"

Josh shoved him. "That should've been me!"

Their gaze met. There was longing in Josh's eyes, but Travis couldn't deal with that right now. He ran back inside, exchanged numbers with Raven, asked Nolan to call him a taxi, then went outside to wait for it, ignoring Josh, who kept shooting him hurt looks.

When the taxi arrived, he got in over Josh's pleas for him to stay.

He got as far as his $20 would take him and then Popped home once the taxi was out of sight.

After fixing Bobby and Amber grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup, he stood in front of the mirror, staring at his reflection. 

Joshua-fucking-Giovanni likes me romantically? That's impossible? I'm not as handsome as him, and I could stand to lose a pound or twenty. And if Josh likes me, then why has he bullied me for so many years? 

No, this has to be a sick joke.

After eating, he trained, focusing on his pyrokinetic abilities until his vision blurred. Still keyed up, he sat on the scorched ground and meditated. Try as he might, Travis couldn't get Josh's words out of his head, so he called it quits. He crawled into bed, hoping things would make sense in the morning.

Travis woke up to five voicemails and ten texts from Josh, all saying some variation of, "I'm sorry. Can we just be friends and pretend last night never happened?"

However, it did happen, and now Travis didn't know what to do.

***

Over the next week, Travis ignored Josh at community service and didn't return his calls or texts. He would have continued avoiding Josh had Dr. Dull not called him on his bullshit.

Josh gave him an anemic smile as they passed each other in Dr. Dull's waiting room. "Hey, stranger."

"Hey yourself. Um, I'm--"

Before Travis could finish his sentence, Dr. Dull called him into his office. He started with his usual question about if anything interesting had happened since their last session.

Against his better judgment, Travis told him about the party and Josh's revelation. "What should I do?"

Dr. Dull steepled his fingers and sighed. "That's not up to me. However, if you're asking my advice, I'd say to look inward and ask yourself how you truly feel about Joshua. And if you don't want to be more than friends with him, tell him and let the chips fall where they may."

"But what if I don't know how I feel about him?"

"Then tell him that and ask that he respect your boundaries until you've come to a decision. First loves can be tough. But if you do want to be more than friends with him, I'll be here to give you the advice I wish I had when I was younger."

"Right."

They talked about the upcoming school year, and Travis told him he didn't see the point as he probably wouldn't finish the year anyway.

"You know, the mind is a powerful thing, and research has shown that our thoughts influence our bodies at the quantum level. If you think positively, things will turn out all right for you."

"As Grams would say, wish in one hand, shit in the other, and see which one fills up first."

"Give it a try. What have you got to lose?"

He grunted and grabbed his messenger bag. He passed Josh in the waiting room, then stopped. "Give me some time to sort things out, please?"

Josh hung his head. "Okay."

He hugged Josh, his embrace lingering a little longer than was accustomed of friends, and they parted ways.

***

Travis stared at his phone, typed out, U wanna hang? and then deleted it for the fifth time in a row.

What do you say to someone who's basically admitted they love you when you don't know if they're telling the truth?

He shook his head and turned his phone off, channel-surfing until he landed on a cheesy fantasy movie. As he watched, he couldn't help thinking if Josh were there, he'd be cracking wise about the cheap costumes and bad CGI effects.

Damn it. Why can't I stop thinking about him?

After flipping through the stations and finding nothing good on, he turned off the TV and Popped to the park where he trained for a while. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw Josh's hurt look.

"Admit it. You miss him, Prometheus said.

I don't need crap from you today.

"Not my fault Josh has you all twisted up in the game."

He does not.

"Keep telling yourself that, and maybe you'll believe it. I don't care what you feel for dude. Just admit you feel something for him and go see him, so I don't have to listen to ya wangst all day."

When I want your opinion, I'll ask.

Raising his mental shields, Travis pushed Prometheus to the back of his mind and focused on levitating himself. He made it a few centimeters off the ground before he lost his concentration and crashed to the ground with a thud. Rubbing his butt, he tried again but only lasted thirty seconds before thoughts of Josh intruded again.

He cursed Josh and himself for being in this situation and returned home, only to find his parents screaming at each other about the budget, which his mother had blown by buying $60 worth of lottery tickets.

Nope.

Popping back to the park, he walked around aimlessly until he found himself in Josh's neighborhood. Whether accidentally or intentionally, he couldn't say.

Sucking in a lungful of air, he walked past the security station, his heart pounding as he neared Josh's house.

"What are you doing here?" Josh said when he opened the door.

"The sperm and egg donor are on the rag, so you get the pleasure of my company. Ya gonna let me in or stand there looking all shook?"

"Why don't you go hang with Raven since you like her so much?"

"You're acting childish. It's not even that serious."

Josh's face went red. "Then, you go around kissing everybody?"

"Nope. She was my first kiss."

"Why are you even here? Go kiss her."

"I miss your shrimpy, red-headed ass." He pulled Josh into a hug, and they stayed that way until Josh pulled away, clearing his throat. 

"I guess we should go inside, huh? FYI, I'm still legit pissed at you."

Blushing, Travis smiled. "Yeah. Mortal Kombat?"

"You read my mind. Prepare for total pwnage."

"In your dreams!" Travis shoved him and ran off giggling.

Josh chased him, pinning Travis against the wall in the foyer. "Caught ya."

"Let ya."

Staring into Josh's eyes, Travis had the urge to kiss him but pushed it away. He didn't want to mess up things again.

"Come on." He pantsed Josh and ran away as Josh hurled death threats at his back.

Once in Josh's room, they kicked off their shoes and settled next to each other on beanbags. He gasped when Josh's knee touched his.

"Sorry." Josh scooted away, turned on the game, and they played several rounds. Travis didn't miss the tension between them. Perhaps if he had more time, he could fix things, but now the best he could hope for was an amicable detente.

As the hours passed, Josh tried to make small talk and crack a few jokes, but it all seemed forced.

"Can we not pretend there isn't an issue between us?"

Josh paused the game. "Meaning what?"

"We're mad at each other, and acting as though we're just friends isn't working, is it? We're both scared of offending the other, so we're pussyfooting around the issue. But that's only making things worse, right?"

"Right, so what do we do?" Josh said, scratching the back of his neck.

"Damn if I know. But I guess I'll start by apologizing for kissing and grinding up on Raven."

"Apology accepted if you accept my apology for bailing on you once we got to the party?"

"Done. But why were you mad?"

Josh rolled his eyes, sighing. "Duh, I'm gay, and I like like you."

It took Travis a minute to process things. "Then when you said that should have been you, you weren't joking?"

"Nope. And I totes want to kiss you now."

"Would you settle for a cuddle?"

In reply, Josh hugged Travis and then pulled away. "I don't feel like playing, but you can still if you want?"

Travis reset the game for one player and played a few rounds until Josh got behind him, wrapping his arms around Travis's back, resting his head against Travis's shoulder.

"Comfy?"

"Mhmm," Josh all but cooed.

Travis found it hard to concentrate on the game with Josh so close, and part of him wanted to tell him to let go of him. But a small and growing part of him reveled in the contact. As all good things must, the cuddle-fest ended when Travis's mother called him.

"Where are you?"

On the fly, he said, "I'm working in my lab. Why?"

"Dinner's ready. It's Hamburger Helper Lasagna."

"I'll be there in a minute."

He told Josh goodbye but promised to call him later.

***

After dinner, he called Josh, and they talked about what they were going to do for the rest of summer vacation. 

"I want to spend it with you if you let me," Josh said, his voice trembling.

"I'd like that, assuming I don't have to share you with the douche-bag brigade."

"David and Jason aren't that bad."

"David's okay, but Jason's is such a cocksucker. No offense."

"I don't get the hate between you guys."

"Something about him trips my bullshit detector, and I don't trust him."

"You'll have to learn to share me."

"If I must. Night, Josh. And . . . I'm glad we hung out today."

"Me, too."

Over the next several days, any time Travis wasn't stuck at home or doing community service, he was at Josh's house. There were a few more setbacks when Josh tried kissing him. He declined, as he was still convinced this was an elaborate joke. Josh would get mad and stop returning his calls and texts for a while. Travis would apologize, and things would be all right for a while.

One day, near the end of June, things changed.

Travis and Josh were lounging around in shorts and tees, sweating rolling off them as they tried to beat the heat. Travis fanned himself, but it did little good. "Remind me again why your parents don't have AC?"

Josh pushed his hair out of his eyes. "They say it's an unnecessary expense."

"Well, I'm dying over here." Travis removed his shorts and shirt, sighing. "That's better." He caught Josh's gaze and half-smiled. "See something ya like?"

Smiling, Josh wrapped his arm around Travis and pulled him close. 

Travis let out a little coo. "Hey, I'm honored you told me. About your being gay, I mean."

Josh gazed into Travis's eyes. "Yeah. Do ya want to listen to some music?"

"Yeah."

Josh hit shuffle, and Crash and Burn by Savage Garden played. Travis had heard the song a few times before when he snooped around Josh's favorites list, but today the song took on a new meaning.

As the last verse of the song played, he looked at Josh and smiled. "You know, it wasn't until just now that I realized something."

"What?"

"I want a friend like in that song. Someone who will be there for me through the good and the bad."

Josh trembled, his bottom lip quivering. "I want to be that friend, more than anything if you'll let me."

Is Josh being honest? There's one way to find out.

"Do you remember when I wanted to talk to you about something?"

"Vaguely, why?"

"Get dressed and follow me outside." Josh shot him a confused look but complied. With each second that passed, Travis doubted himself more. But he had to do this.

"What's so impor--"

Travis tossed a fireball from hand to hand before extinguishing it. "Surprise!" he said, looking down. "I have powers." 

 

Author's Note: What a wild ride this chapter was. Next chapter finds Josh geeking out over Travis's powers and them agreeing to record his training progress--for science!

 

Reminder: Nifty needs your continued support, so spare a few coins for the archivist if you can (https://donate.nifty.org).