Chapter Twenty-Nine
Travis glared at Josh's retreating form.
That moronic, maladjusted midget. He said he
wouldn't leave me alone, and there he goes, off for who knows how long this
time.
"Travis, why are you mopping?"
He about jumped out his skin at Oblivion's
words. What do you want?
"Merely to remind you of the ticking
clock. You only have a short while left, yes?"
Yeah, so?
"So, forget Josh and have some fun. There are
plenty of drinks and mates of either sex from which to choose."
Technically, that should be `of either
gender.' However, gender is a socially constructed spectrum--
"Are you going to lecture me on the finer
points of political correctness, or are you going to, as the kids say, do it up
big?"
Travis smiled. You're right. Screw
Josh.
He made his way through the crowd to the table
where drinks were laid out, and picking one at random, he downed it and winced,
then downed another.
"Slow down, dude. You're gonna hurl."
He turned at the sound of the mellifluous
voice, ready to tear the speaker a new one when he was struck by her all-black
garb.
"You don't look like the type to be at a place
like this," he said, giving her a once over. He took in her combat boots,
corset, leather micro-mini, fishnet stockings on her arms and legs, and
lipstick.
She flashed him a wry smile. "Usually, I
wouldn't be caught dead in a den of such idiocy, but my cousin convinced me to
tag along with her, then bailed on me."
"Same. My soon-to-be ex-friend said he
wouldn't leave me and has spent the whole night blowing me off to hang with his
other friends."
She pursed her pouty lips, shaking her head.
"That's a violation of rule one of the friend code.
Leave no friend behind."
He chuckled. "I know, right? I'm Travis, by
the way." He stuck out his hand, and she shook it.
"My legal name's Ashley, but I go by Raven.
Aren't you going to ask me why I'm wearing all black?"
"If I were to guess, it's to symbolize the
omnipresence of death and how we're all hurtling toward the great abyss."
Her mouth hung open, and then she snickered.
"I didn't take you for a goth."
"I abhor labels. But if you press me on my
philosophical underpinnings, then, while I empathize with the Goth ethos, I'm
more an anti-natalist, Nietzschean Nihilist, with shades of Secular Humanism."
Raven gave him a half-smile. "In other words,
kids suck, and everything's pointless, but we should try to make the best of
things while we're here?"
"Basically. Want to sit and talk about it?"
She sipped her drink, her pale-faced scrunched
up. "It beats standing around listening to this shite."
Travis snagged another drink, and they made
their way to the couch, which, given the number of people at the party, he was
surprised to find empty.
After discussing Nietzsche's concept of the
Uber Mensch, during which Travis bragged about reading Beyond Good and
Evil in the original German, they moved on to the purgatory that was
middle school.
"I can't wait until I'm old enough to drop
out. The whole education system is just a racket to indoctrinate us into
becoming brainless worker drones for the capitalist machine," Raven said,
pausing to vape, her sandy-blonde hair falling in her face.
"True, though learning itself is a worthy
endeavor that we should strive to continue all our lives, short as they may
be." He took a sip of his drink and made a sour face as the next song started.
"Whoever chose the music has awful taste."
"I know, right? I've been trying to hack into
the Spotify station all night, but no luck."
Travis racked his mind, trying to remember
whose house this was.
Nolan, something. James? Johnson? Graham?
That's it!
He told her to input Nolan's name, but
that wasn't it. Next, they tried, "NolanRulez." Nope.
Then they tried, "NolanRulez!"
"I'm in," she said. "Now let's play something
that doesn't make me nauseous."
She selected Disposable Teens by
Marilyn Manson, an oldie but goodie, and they bopped their heads, singing
along.
Raven laughed, her hazel eyes sparkling.
"Didn't take you for a Manson fan."
"If it's angry, anti-establishment, and has a
good beat, I like it."
She smiled and stood. "Shall we show these
sheeple how it's done?"
Travis looked from her to the dance floor. "I
guess--"
He barely had time to down his drink as she
pulled him to the dancefloor, her body mashing into his as he tried not to make
a fool of himself. She held him close and said, "Relax." He relaxed his
shoulders, calming the ball of nerves in his chest, and got into it, gyrating
along with her.
When the song ended, all eyes were on
them, but he didn't care. Travis had her cue up Beautiful People and
shared a smile with Raven as they danced. Raven's body ground against him as he
stood there in shock. It felt good, but he couldn't help thinking he was
betraying Josh. But Josh had abandoned him, so he went with it and ground his
crotch into hers; his head bobbed to the baseline as she grabbed his ass, pulling
him closer.
When the song ended, he wiped the sweat from
his brow and tried to catch his breath. "That was fun."
"Yeah," she said, then looked down and
giggled. He followed her gaze and wanted to die.
He tried laughing it off, commenting it was due
to her sensuality. Raven smiled and queued up another song when a blond boy
with cornrows stepped onto the dancefloor and shouted to get everyone's
attention. "Yeah, let's listen to something not on the school-shooter
playlist."
He put on a slow song, and when Raven tried to
change it, she told Travis someone had changed the password. His face fell as
disappointment washed over him. "So much for that."
"We can still dance, even if the music's
crap."
Why not?
Taking her hand, he wrapped his other arm
around her waist, and she did the same, her breath warm against his skin.
"I like you," she said, then kissed him full
on the lips.
Part of him felt he should stop this, but the
larger, drunker part of him said, "Fuck it," and he kissed her back.
Raven's lips were smoother and softer than
he'd expected, and she wasn't shy about taking charge, grabbing his hands and placing them on her breasts.
He was edging his way down her back when he
heard a familiar voice.
"What the actual fuck?" Josh yelled, storming
up to them and grabbing Travis's arm.
"What's your problem?" Travis said, slurring
his words.
"You. Me. Outside. Now!"
He looked to Raven, who shrugged.
"Be right back," he said, then followed Josh
behind the house, where a few people were smoking a joint.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Josh
said when they were a safe distance away from the others.
Travis scrunched up his face, confused. "I was
having a little fun like you told me to."
"You call making out and feeling-up that girl
a little fun?"
Face warming with rage, Travis raised his
voice. "Why are you getting mad? You left me alone after you said you
wouldn't."
"I can't believe you right now."
"What? Jealous much?"
Josh grunted. "You're so full of shit right
now."
People were starting to shoot them looks, and
Travis had about reached his drama limit for the night. "Maybe you shouldn't
have abandoned me."
Josh threw his hands up in the air. "I can't
even with you right now. You put on this big act like your heart's made of
stone, but I know the truth."
He got in Josh's face, their noses touching.
"And what's that, Giovanni?"
"Your heart's made of glass, and you're so
scared of it getting broken, you push everyone away."
"Since when did you care so much about whom I
kiss?"
Josh shoved him. "That should've been me!"
Their gaze met. There was longing in Josh's
eyes, but Travis couldn't deal with that right now. He ran back inside,
exchanged numbers with Raven, asked Nolan to call him a taxi, then went outside
to wait for it, ignoring Josh, who kept shooting him hurt looks.
When the taxi arrived, he got in over Josh's
pleas for him to stay.
He got as far as his $20 would take him and
then Popped home once the taxi was out of sight.
After fixing Bobby and Amber grilled cheese
sandwiches and tomato soup, he stood in front of the mirror, staring at his
reflection.
Joshua-fucking-Giovanni likes me romantically? That's impossible? I'm not as handsome as him, and I could
stand to lose a pound or twenty. And if Josh likes me, then why has he bullied
me for so many years?
No, this has to be a
sick joke.
After eating, he trained, focusing on his
pyrokinetic abilities until his vision blurred. Still keyed up, he sat on the
scorched ground and meditated. Try as he might, Travis couldn't get Josh's
words out of his head, so he called it quits. He crawled into bed, hoping
things would make sense in the morning.
Travis woke up to five voicemails and ten
texts from Josh, all saying some variation of, "I'm sorry. Can we just be
friends and pretend last night never happened?"
However, it did happen, and now Travis didn't
know what to do.
***
Over the next week, Travis ignored Josh at
community service and didn't return his calls or texts. He would have continued
avoiding Josh had Dr. Dull not called him on his bullshit.
Josh gave him an anemic smile as they passed
each other in Dr. Dull's waiting room. "Hey,
stranger."
"Hey yourself. Um, I'm--"
Before Travis could finish his sentence, Dr.
Dull called him into his office. He started with his usual question about if
anything interesting had happened since their last session.
Against his better judgment, Travis told him
about the party and Josh's revelation. "What should I do?"
Dr. Dull steepled his fingers and sighed.
"That's not up to me. However, if you're asking my advice, I'd say to look
inward and ask yourself how you truly feel about Joshua. And if you don't want
to be more than friends with him, tell him and let the chips fall where they
may."
"But what if I don't know how I feel about
him?"
"Then tell him that and ask that he respect
your boundaries until you've come to a decision. First loves can be tough. But
if you do want to be more than friends with him, I'll be here to give you the
advice I wish I had when I was younger."
"Right."
They talked about the upcoming school year,
and Travis told him he didn't see the point as he probably wouldn't finish the
year anyway.
"You know, the mind is a powerful thing, and
research has shown that our thoughts influence our bodies at the quantum level.
If you think positively, things will turn out all right for you."
"As Grams would say, wish in one hand, shit in
the other, and see which one fills up first."
"Give it a try. What have you got to lose?"
He grunted and grabbed his messenger bag. He
passed Josh in the waiting room, then stopped. "Give me some time to sort
things out, please?"
Josh hung his head. "Okay."
He hugged Josh, his embrace lingering a little
longer than was accustomed of friends, and they parted ways.
***
Travis stared at his phone, typed out, U
wanna hang? and then deleted it for the
fifth time in a row.
What do you say to someone who's basically
admitted they love you when you don't know if they're telling the truth?
He shook his head and turned his phone off,
channel-surfing until he landed on a cheesy fantasy movie. As he watched, he
couldn't help thinking if Josh were there, he'd be cracking wise about the
cheap costumes and bad CGI effects.
Damn it. Why can't I stop thinking about him?
After flipping through the stations and
finding nothing good on, he turned off the TV and Popped to the park where he
trained for a while. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw Josh's hurt look.
"Admit it. You miss him, Prometheus said.
I don't need crap
from you today.
"Not my fault Josh has you all twisted up in
the game."
He does not.
"Keep telling yourself that, and maybe you'll
believe it. I don't care what you feel for dude. Just admit you feel something
for him and go see him, so I don't have to listen to ya
wangst all day."
When I want your opinion, I'll ask.
Raising his mental shields, Travis pushed
Prometheus to the back of his mind and focused on levitating himself. He made
it a few centimeters off the ground before he lost his concentration and
crashed to the ground with a thud. Rubbing his butt, he tried
again but only lasted thirty seconds before thoughts of Josh intruded again.
He cursed Josh and himself for being in this
situation and returned home, only to find his parents screaming at each other
about the budget, which his mother had blown by buying $60 worth of lottery
tickets.
Nope.
Popping back to the park, he walked around
aimlessly until he found himself in Josh's neighborhood. Whether accidentally
or intentionally, he couldn't say.
Sucking in a lungful of air, he walked past
the security station, his heart pounding as he neared Josh's house.
"What are you doing here?" Josh said when he
opened the door.
"The sperm and egg donor are on the rag, so
you get the pleasure of my company. Ya gonna let me
in or stand there looking all shook?"
"Why don't you go hang with Raven since you
like her so much?"
"You're acting childish. It's not even that
serious."
Josh's face went red. "Then, you go around
kissing everybody?"
"Nope. She was my first kiss."
"Why are you even here? Go kiss her."
"I miss your shrimpy, red-headed ass." He
pulled Josh into a hug, and they stayed that way until Josh pulled away,
clearing his throat.
"I guess we should go inside, huh? FYI, I'm
still legit pissed at you."
Blushing, Travis smiled. "Yeah. Mortal
Kombat?"
"You read my mind. Prepare for total pwnage."
"In your dreams!" Travis shoved him and ran
off giggling.
Josh chased him, pinning Travis against the
wall in the foyer. "Caught ya."
"Let ya."
Staring into Josh's eyes, Travis had the urge
to kiss him but pushed it away. He didn't want to mess up things again.
"Come on." He pantsed
Josh and ran away as Josh hurled death threats at his back.
Once in Josh's room, they kicked off their
shoes and settled next to each other on beanbags. He gasped when Josh's knee
touched his.
"Sorry." Josh scooted away, turned on the
game, and they played several rounds. Travis didn't miss the tension between
them. Perhaps if he had more time, he could fix things, but now the best he
could hope for was an amicable detente.
As the hours passed, Josh tried to make small
talk and crack a few jokes, but it all seemed forced.
"Can we not pretend there isn't an issue
between us?"
Josh paused the game. "Meaning what?"
"We're mad at each other, and acting as though
we're just friends isn't working, is it? We're both scared of offending the
other, so we're pussyfooting around the issue. But that's only making things
worse, right?"
"Right, so what do we do?" Josh said,
scratching the back of his neck.
"Damn if I know. But I guess I'll start by
apologizing for kissing and grinding up on Raven."
"Apology accepted if you accept my apology for
bailing on you once we got to the party?"
"Done. But why were you mad?"
Josh rolled his eyes, sighing. "Duh, I'm gay,
and I like like you."
It took Travis a minute to process things. "Then
when you said that should have been you, you weren't joking?"
"Nope. And I totes
want to kiss you now."
"Would you settle for a cuddle?"
In reply, Josh hugged Travis and then pulled
away. "I don't feel like playing, but you can still if you want?"
Travis reset the game for one player and
played a few rounds until Josh got behind him, wrapping his arms around
Travis's back, resting his head against Travis's shoulder.
"Comfy?"
"Mhmm," Josh all but
cooed.
Travis found it hard to concentrate on the
game with Josh so close, and part of him wanted to tell him to let go of him.
But a small and growing part of him reveled in the contact. As all good things
must, the cuddle-fest ended when Travis's mother called him.
"Where are you?"
On the fly, he said, "I'm working in my lab.
Why?"
"Dinner's ready. It's Hamburger Helper
Lasagna."
"I'll be there in a minute."
He told Josh goodbye but promised to call him
later.
***
After dinner, he called Josh, and they talked
about what they were going to do for the rest of summer vacation.
"I want to spend it with you if you let me,"
Josh said, his voice trembling.
"I'd like that, assuming I don't have to share
you with the douche-bag brigade."
"David and Jason aren't that bad."
"David's okay, but Jason's is such a cocksucker. No offense."
"I don't get the hate between you guys."
"Something about him trips my bullshit
detector, and I don't trust him."
"You'll have to learn to share me."
"If I must. Night, Josh. And . . . I'm glad we
hung out today."
"Me, too."
Over the next several days, any time Travis
wasn't stuck at home or doing community service, he was at Josh's house. There
were a few more setbacks when Josh tried kissing him. He declined, as he was
still convinced this was an elaborate joke. Josh would get mad and stop
returning his calls and texts for a while. Travis would apologize, and things
would be all right for a while.
One day, near the end of June, things changed.
Travis and Josh were lounging around in shorts
and tees, sweating rolling off them as they tried to beat the heat. Travis
fanned himself, but it did little good. "Remind me again why your parents don't
have AC?"
Josh pushed his hair out of his eyes. "They
say it's an unnecessary expense."
"Well, I'm dying over here." Travis removed
his shorts and shirt, sighing. "That's better." He caught Josh's gaze and
half-smiled. "See something ya like?"
Smiling, Josh wrapped his arm around Travis
and pulled him close.
Travis let out a little coo. "Hey, I'm honored
you told me. About your being gay, I mean."
Josh gazed into Travis's eyes. "Yeah. Do ya want to listen to some music?"
"Yeah."
Josh hit shuffle, and Crash and Burn by
Savage Garden played. Travis had heard the song a few times before when he
snooped around Josh's favorites list, but today the song took on a new meaning.
As the last verse of the song played, he
looked at Josh and smiled. "You know, it wasn't until just now that I realized
something."
"What?"
"I want a friend like in that song. Someone
who will be there for me through the good and the bad."
Josh trembled, his bottom lip quivering. "I
want to be that friend, more than anything if you'll let me."
Is Josh being honest? There's one way to find
out.
"Do you remember when I wanted to talk to you
about something?"
"Vaguely, why?"
"Get dressed and follow me outside." Josh shot
him a confused look but complied. With each second that passed, Travis doubted
himself more. But he had to do this.
"What's so impor--"
Travis tossed a fireball from hand to hand
before extinguishing it. "Surprise!" he said, looking down. "I have
powers."
Author's Note: What a wild ride this chapter
was. Next chapter finds Josh geeking out over Travis's
powers and them agreeing to record his training progress--for science!
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