Who am I?
Contents
Note:
This Story does not pretend to be about the real Royal Family in Sweden. All the characters in the story are pure imagination and have nothing to do with the members of the Royal Family.
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If you are looking for lots of slam bam sex, you are in the wrong place.
I want to write a story about young boys and love. Some might think that young people cannot love for real. That's not true. I know that from my own life. When I was a young teenager, 13 -- 15 years old, I was passionately in love, I just did not know. I had no clue that it was love that dictated that I HAD to be together with him every possible minute.
When I came home from school, I just threw my schoolbag into my room at home, and then ran off to my friend's home. I was always so disappointed if he was not home, and I would use the next hours to try to find him. It was very frustrating, and so good when I found him, or when he was home when I came.
Now, many years later, I'm wondering if his mother understood. She must at least be wondering about this boy that called at her door every day asking for her 3 years younger son. But she never said anything to me about this. On the contrary, she was so kind to me and helped me to find him when he was not at home.
His father did understand, or more correct, he thought he understood. He had been a pupil on an English public school (boarding) and told me in certain words that he thought I was out for sex with his son. Of course, we had some sex, but only what normal teenagers did, like comparing and mutual masturbation, sometimes a bit sucking. The real sex came 25 years later, but that's another story.
Love can for a young teenager be fantastic, but also very painful. I hope that I can manage to show both sides of love in this story.
If you have comments to my story, you can write to davidi50@hotmail.com
David Lundquist.
His world fell apart late April 2007 when the first secretary from the Swedish Embassy in Tel Aviv told him that his mother was dead.
He had lived alone with his mom in Tel Aviv all his life. They had a good life together. His mom was teaching part time in a primary school in Tel Aviv. He was in his second year in middle school in a school close to home.
They lived in a big apartment in the northern part of Tel Aviv. He knew that it was a very expensive part of Tel Aviv, but he never wondered how it could be that they had such a nice apartment, which must be way out of what his mom was paid at the school. He knew that they got some money from Sweden, he even got an allowance from a fund in Sweden, not enormous, but he always has enough money to spend. Naturally he guessed that mom has inherited money from family in Sweden.
He had lived in Israel all his life. He and his mother had moved to Israel just after he was born in Stockholm, Sweden.
Earlier he asked his mom about family in Sweden. He knew that she was Swedish, and he even had a Swedish passport in addition to his Israeli passport. But she would not talk about family in Sweden, neither about his father nor any other family. She just told him that her family had disowned her when she got pregnant with a man she was not married to. So, they never talked about family. Sometimes he missed family when he saw how much joy family gave his friends. But he accepted that this was his life. Besides he had lots of good friends.
But one day in April, in the last lesson they had that day, a very serious rector came into their classroom and asked Joav to come out to the corridor. In the corridor the first secretary at the Swedish Embassy waited for them. He did not remember much of that day after the man from the embassy told him that his mother was dead. She had been shot dead by a terrorist in the Mall at Diezengoff Square.
The rest of the day was black, and the following days was a terrible nightmare. Lots of people trying to comfort him. But everything was like in a haze. He neither could nor would sleep alone in the apartment. His best friend's family let him sleep at their place. They offered him a bedroom for himself, but he insisted sleeping together with his friend in his bed. His friend's comfort at night made it possible for him to go through the first week.
They were very nice to him, but it must have been difficult for them to have him. He cried most of the time, and he broke completely down during the funeral a few days after she was killed.
The Swedish embassy took care of him. It never crossed his mind to wonder why they looked after him the way they did, but they took hold of his life 100 % after his mother died.
After a week it was decided that he should move to Sweden. He had no idea who decided this, and he was first very much against it. After discussing it with the embassy, he had to agree that it would be very difficult for him to live alone in Israel. He was only 14 and had no family in Israel, and to live alone in the apartment in Tel Aviv would be too difficult. The embassy told him that he had relatives in Sweden; they had found a cousin of her mother, a Lisa Hultman. She had agreed to look after him. It was also decided that he should start in a boarding school not far from Stockholm; Sigtunaskolan Humanistiska Läroverket. It was an international boarding school, and they thought it would be easier for him to find friends in a boarding school, where the pupils were together all day.
I turned out that he had a Swedish guardian that had been appointed when he was born, a lawyer with a very funny name; Axel Calissendorff. He flew down to Tel Aviv from Stockholm and met Joav at the Swedish Embassy. He was an old dusty man, but friendly and quite funny. Joav took a liking to him fast.
Calissendorff went together with Joav to the apartment where Joav picked out a few things he wanted to bring to Sweden and his new life. It was very hard for Joav to be there, and he cried a lot. The rest would stay in the apartment for the time being. After Joav's wish, it was decided to let the apartment be as it was. What would be done with it could be decided later in the year. A man from the embassy would look after it.
Joav took a tearful goodbye to the apartment where he had lived 13 happy years. Then he met with his classmates to take farewell. He tried as hard he could to be manly and not cry, but he could not help it. The first hug was all it took. He cried through hugging with all his classmates, and he was not the only one crying.
After a special goodbye to his friend where he had slept the last week, he flew to Sweden together with his new guardian. The last he saw of Israel was the shoreline at Tel Aviv slowly receding behind them.
Stockholm was cold, even though it was late May. He was sure it would take time to get used to the temperature. Aunt Lisa met him at the airport. It was a stiff and formal meeting, but she looked ok to Joav.
The first thing he did in Stockholm was to buy warmer cloths. Aunt Lisa helped him. She had tidied a room for him in her apartment, with a bed and a desk. It was nice. The school uniform (gray pants, a dark blue jacket, white shirts, and a dark blue tie with white stripes) he purchased in the school shop when he moved to the school in mid-august. It looked stupid to Joav, and he did not look forward to wearing it.
He had the choice to have a single room for himself at the school, or to share the room with another student. He chose to share. The few days he slept alone in his room in his aunt's apartment had been hell. He did not sleep much and cried a lot.
His roommate, Jan, was a nice Swedish boy a year older than himself. He was very understanding. Joav guessed the school had told him about what had happened.
It was difficult for him to mingle and interact with the other boys in the school. The pain was still too massive, so he spent most of the time for himself. The nights were still very difficult. He woke up crying almost every night, and he did not dare to crawl up in his room-mate's bed. His roommate understood how he felt, his parents were divorced, so he had kind of lost his father too and comforted Joav as good he could.
But Joav was desperate for physical comfort, like what he got the week he stayed at his friend's in Tel Aviv after his mother was killed. When he woke up at night crying, his friend had crept up in Joav's bed and hugged him till he fell asleep.
At last, he could not take it anymore. Blushing he asked Jan if he could come up in Jan's bed when he woke up at night. Jan looked at Joav with understanding eyes and said yes. But Joav had to promise not to tell anybody about it. The following night Joav woke up from a nightmare, and Jan told him to come over to his bed. With Jan's strong arms around him he quickly fell asleep to a long sleep without nightmares or bad dreams.
The first weekend he was invited to a get-to-know-each-other party in Stockholm for new and old pupils. He went to Stockholm for the party and stayed over at Aunt Lisa's.
He changed to party clothes at Aunt Lisa's and was driven to the party by auntie. The party was in a restaurant that was closed for other guests that evening. The party clothes -- like the school uniform - were new and very unfamiliar to Joav. He was used to wear shorts all the time. If he wore big boy pants, it was always jeans, the only kind of long pants he had ever had.
The party was very nice. He met a fellow student from his house at the school. He was new at the school just like Joav, and they bonded at once and stayed together the rest of the evening. He told Joav that he was Swedish, that his name was Karl Filip, but just Filip with friends. His family lived in Stockholm, and he was a full-time boarder at the school. He was 14 years old, just as Joav.
Filip looked a bit younger than Joav, even though he was the same age. But he was very beautiful, Joav had to admit that. Brown hair a bit long, big dark brown eyes, just as Joav. Joav could clearly see a dark shadow over his mouth. He would probably have to start shaving in a few months' time. His lips were dark red and very kissable. Joav blushed when thinking that, and it tingled in his groin. He was not as high as Joav, but he seemed to have a very tight body. He was dressed up very smart, and Joav suddenly thought that his suit was shit.
Filip found Joav's story very exciting, and they talked most of the evening about how it was to live and be a teenager in Israel. Thinking back, Joav realized that they spoke next to nothing about Filip. Joav just learned that Filip did not have any siblings, and that his father was dead, he died in a car accident two years ago. After a few tears was shed, they agreed that they both had deep sorrows, and that they would try to help each other out.
The party was fun. The only thing he did not like was that a couple of men went around in the restaurant and took pictures of the guests. One of the men took several pictures of Joav, it was very uncomfortable. Filip said he should not bother. They were reporters, they were allowed in to take pictures to their newspapers.
When the party ended at around midnight, Filip asked if Joav wanted to sleep over at his place. Joav was so happy, already making friends in his new school, and answered yes at once, forgetting that he was supposed to stay at auntie the night.
They had used older pupils to get them some wine, and they were both quite tipsy when leaving the party. Filip had some kind of security with him -- Joav had learned that a few of his fellow students had some or another form of security -- and being from Israel he knew what security was. Filip changed some angry words with his driver when he said that Joav was coming with him. But Filip insisted, and soon they sat in the car driving through a dark Stockholm. The stopped at a very big and impressive building where a security man at the door made some fuss when Filip told them that Joav was coming with him. Joav had to show his ID card. Being Israeli he was used to having to show security, and always carried his with him. The only trouble was that Joav gave the security man his Israeli ID card. This caused a lot of talk between Filip and the security man.
"Do you have another ID cards, maybe Swedish?" Filip asked him.
"Sure." Joav gave the security his brand-new Swedish ID card and got his Israeli in return.
The security admitted him after a few questions, but Joav could sense that he was not satisfied. Joav and Filip thought it was hilarious funny and could not help giggling. The security man clearly did not think it was funny. He did not look happy, and Joav saw that he picked up his phone when they left him.
"What was all that about?" Joav wanted to know. "So much security? Who are you really?"
"We talk about that tomorrow, OK?" Filip looked suddenly unhappy, so Joav just nodded.
They tried to be quiet, but just before reaching Filip's room, Filip stumbled and crashed into a chair. And this time Joav could not stop laughing. But almost at once a man came half-running round the corner, asking Filip if everything was ok. Filip said yes, but the man helped Filip up on his feet, it was obvious that Filip had trouble with his balance.
Joav felt that the man looked at him closely before he opened the door to Filip's room for them.
"Make yourself comfortable." Filip said and pointed vaguely at a big king size bed, before he fell on his back in the bed.
"Do I sleep in the bed?" Joav hurried to ask Filip before he fell asleep. Filip nodded, "It's room enough for two." With that statement Filip closed his eyes and fell asleep.
Joav was unsure about what to do. He wanted to go to sleep himself, but what about Filip? He was fully dressed in his beautiful suit, except for his jacket that he had thrown on a chair. Without thinking much about it, Joav decided that Filip could not sleep with his shoes on. Carefully he loosened the laches on Filip's shoes and took them off his feet. He pulled off his socks. It looked more natural.
After thinking a few seconds about it, Joav opened the button in Filip's trousers and pulled down the zipper. Filip had on black boxer briefs underneath. Before thinking much more about it, he took hold of the legs on Filip's trousers and pulled his trousers down and off his legs. Joav held his breath. Filip was so nice, so...so exiting. He could clearly see his dick, pointing to the left under the black cotton. So close, so far off! He thought a few secs if he should lift up the briefs to look, he was sure Filip would not notice anything. But he did not. Still, his breath came faster, and he felt the sudden warmth in his crotch.
He hurried undressing and pulled his comforter over him, safe on his side of the bed. He was very tired and fell to sleep at once. He woke up once in the middle of the night and had to pee. Filip was sleeping on his side. He had kicked off most of his comforter. Joav stood still and watched him before creeping under his comforter. Before falling to sleep again, he realized that he had had no nightmare, and that he had not woken up once before he had to pee. The last he remembered from that night was that he took hold of Filip's hand and held it while falling to sleep again.
He woke up suddenly by a sound he did not recognize. The first seconds he did not understand where he was, but then the memories of the evening before surfaced. The welcome-party for the new 14-year-old pupils in his new school and meeting Filip.
He yawned, stretched his legs, and turned over on his side. And there was Filip on his side of the big king size bed. He was sleeping on his stomach with his face on the pillow, facing Joav. It was such a beautiful face, soft and kind of glowing in the weak morning light. He was breathing slowly through his partly open mouth. The face was framed by the lustrous brown hair.
It must be early morning. The light was shining through the thin white gossamer curtains. The night had been quite warm, and they had both kicked the comforters away and down on the floor. Filip's body was stretched out beside him. An adolescent body, still a boy, but it has clearly started its way to adulthood. They both had only boxer shorts on, and Joav lay still, quiet watching Filip's body.
He faintly remembered that Filip's offer to stay the night at his place had made some fuss with two men that seemed to look after him. But Filip had stopped them with some hard words. Joav's Swedish was a bit rusty; he had not used it for a long time, but he understood that Filip told the men that Joav came with him, period!
And it was nice that Filip had a driver that took them home from the party to Filip's apartment or whatever it was. What he could remember from arriving to Filip's place was that it was in a big, impressive building downtown.
He was not surprised that Filip had a driver and was looked after by security men. In the short time since he started on his new school, Sigtunaskolan Humanistiska Läroverket, he understood that quite a few of the students had security in one way or another, Filip was apparently one of those.
The mattress heaved a bit when Filip turned over on his back. He lay with his left leg stretched out on the bed, and the right leg bent and standing up. Joav let his eyes glide up Filip's leg to the knee, and down to his crotch. His boxer brief was on the small side, so Joav could see most of his thigh. The inside looked so soft, and he wanted to touch it and feel it under his fingers. He did not.
On the inside of Joav's thigh close to his crotch, he saw a dark figure, like a birthmark. He held his breath. He recognized the birthmark; it was identical to the one on his own thigh.
What was this? How could Filip have an identical birthmark? Filip lived in Sweden, and Joav was from Israel. Where they family? But he had no family, neither in Israel nor in Sweden.
He tried to lie down and fall asleep again. But it was not possible. His head was in a turmoil. He carefully shook Filip's shoulder and whispered:
"Filip, Wake up!"
Filip opened his eyes slowly. He stared at Joav and looked a bit confused, before his face split in a wonderful warm smile,
"Hi Joav! Are you good?"
"Yea, sure! It's so nice here. You do have a beautiful home!"
"Ah, it's too much, just you wait!" Filip threw him an embarrassed smile.
"Eh, Joav"
"Yes?" Joav answered.
"Did you undress me last night?"
"Yes." Joav felt the heat in his cheeks. "I thought you would sleep better without your shoes and trousers. It's ok, yes?"
"Yes, sure. Only a bit different. No boys have ever undressed me before."
"Have girls?" Joav risked.
They laughed together. The laughter broke the tension that suddenly was there.
"But Filip, I must ask you a question."
"Come on, no problem."
"It a bit embarrassing".
"Come on, ask what you want."
"Ok, I could not help seeing that you have a birthmark on your thigh." Joav blushed.
"Oh that." Filip answered. "I've had all my life."
"Can I look at it closer?"
"Sure, but why?"
"I will tell you, just let me look at it."
"Sure." Filip sat back against his pillows and held the leg of his boxer away from the birthmark. Joav noticed that Filip blushed.
And the birthmark was there all right. It looked very much like a shark, as he knew it would. He felt the heat rising in his body, his face must be glowing by now.
Filip seemed not to notice anything and told Joav the story about the birthmark. "It's a family thing. For some reason or another, all male members of dad's family have it, without exception. It looks like a shark, as you can see."
All colors left Joav's face, and he started to shake. Filip looked worried at him.
"Are you ok?"
Joav held his boxers away from his crotch. "Look." he said in a small voice.
And there it was, Joav's birthmark, identical to the shark on Filip's thigh.
"Oh" was all Filip managed to say. "But that must mean, I mean, we ......"
Tears started running down Joav's cheeks. He looked at Filip with a desperate look before he began sobbing. Deep heavy sobs started tearing through his body.
Filip did not know what to do, but he understood that Joav needed help, now. He moved over to Joav and held around him.
"Why are you crying Joav? Is something wrong?"
Joav shook his head, but the tears kept coming in between his sobs.
"What about your father? Does he have the birthmark too?"
"I don't know, I have no father." Joav's sobs slowed down but became sorer.
"Oh." Was all Filip managed.
"I never met him, and mom never wanted to talk about him. I don't know who he is."
"But maybe you can ask your mom about it?" Filip tried an optimistic tone.
"Mom is dead. That's why I'm here in Sweden." He started crying again.
Filip managed another "Oh", but then his brain seemed to work again. "We must speak with mom." He took up his cell phone and pushed in some numbers.
"We better dress before mom comes", Filip smiled to him and put on a t-shirt and a pair of jeans. Joav had only the suit from the party yesterday, but Filip gave him some of his own clothes. They fitted well.
After a few minutes there were some soft knocks on the door. Filip answered, "Come in!" and the door opened. A middle-aged woman came into the room. Joav could see she was family, so much alike Filip. When she saw Joav, she stiffened. Joav saw a mix of fright and shock in her eyes.
"Hi mom." Filip greeted her.
"Will you present me to your friend, Filip?" Joav felt she was scrutinizing him.
"Yes, sure mom. Mom, this is my friend Joav Bonde. Joav, this is my mother, Christina." Joav stood up and shook her hand. She said something to him in Swedish, and he excused himself in English: "I'm sorry, I do not speak Swedish. Not much anyhow."
"No problem, and where are you from, Mr. Bonde?" she continued, now in English.
"I'm from Israel, ma'am."
"But you have a Swedish family name?"
"My mom was Swedish."
"And why are you here in Sweden?"
"My mom died recently, and I've moved here to live with my aunt, and to go to Filip's school."
"Oh, I'm so sorry."
"Please do not be, ma'am." Joav said. "It does not help."
Filip's mother spoke to Filip in Swedish. Joav did not understand everything but got the meaning of their words. She told Filip that he was not allowed to invite to sleep-overs without asking for permission. Filip was angry, telling her that he invited those he wanted to invite, and besides, there was nobody to ask for permission in the middle of the night.
Joav understood it as he was not welcome and picked up his suit. "I better leave now" he said in a small voice.
"You are not going anywhere!" Filip told him in an angry voice. "You are my guest, and you need help!" Joav put down his suit again.
"Mom, there is something you have to see!" Filip unbuckled his belt and showed his trousers down.
"What on earth do you want to show me?" she looked at him with an amused look.
"You too." Filip told Joav.
Joav hesitated a few seconds, then opened his trousers and pushed them down on his thighs.
"Show mom your birthmark, Filip said and held his boxers away from his own birthmark.
Blushing fiercely, Joav held his boxers away from his birthmark.
Filip's mother looked from Joav's birthmark to Joav's. She was quiet for a long time.
"We have to talk, but let's do it over breakfast, I take it you have not eaten yet?" She opened the door to leave. "But I recommend a shower first, you both stink of booze and smoke. See you in 20 minutes in the breakfast room." She did not wait for their answer and walked out.
Filip picked up two boxers from a locker and threw one to Joav.