Date: Wed, 29 Aug 2001 11:39:43 +0000
From: Hessa Meena <hessa_meena@hotmail.com>
Subject: High School - The Good Ol One Twenty

Thanks to everyone and their kind notes about my other stories, this one
isn't as steamy, more ... mushy?

SO IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE TWO PEOPLE OF THE SAME SEX IN LOVE/ MAKING LOVE
...whaddaya doing HERE?

...nuff said, write me at          hessa_meena@hotmail.com

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

High School
The Good Ol' One Twenty

I first started wondering about Sara in Spanish class. We had a substitute
for the first few weeks, and she younger and cuter than any of us were used
to. When she left the room for a moment, one of the guys leaned over to his
friend and in his classroom accent, said "la profesora es que bonita, no?"
his friend nodded.

"Word, she looks like Gina Gershon," my ears burned. Over the summer when my
parents were out of town I rented "Bound" and nearly drooled on the remote.
Gina Gershon was a little cheesy, but more than enough to get my teen, newly
out lesbo self going.

It was senior year, and I'd finally started telling people I was gay, and
didn't give a shit anymore. I knew I'd get into a good college, and in my
goof-ass teeny private school that's all that mattered. Only one more year,
and I could withstand the boredom, weird looks and loneliness because I had
to.

Sara looked up too, she'd been thumbing through a music magazine, and raised
an eyebrow when someone, a boring sort of popular girl glanced up from her
nails and asked, "who's Gina Gershon?"

My brain kept prancing around saying, "she's fine, and she's so much finer
than you," because she was one of the ruder, meaner ones in our class, but
Sara made my day.

She sighed, put the magazine away and looked at her. "She's an actress who
was in the movie "Showgirls" and "Bound" and had her own TV show for a
while." I looked at  Sara in shock, someone obviously dug Gina. I smiled
back into my notebook and hid behind my long blonde hair maybe this year
would be more interesting than I thought.

I barely knew Sara, she transferred to a beastly boarding school by my first
year, but I remember her visits when she was on break. She was like the
returning queen, and everyone, even the girls were in her business. But now
she was back for senior year, and disinterested in the social ranking she
used to reign over. She was changed somehow: Not as preppy and icy, and she
always had a walkman.

While she was different, Sara still wasn't disenchanted enough for my crowd-
I was getting bored with them too. All they seemed to care about was getting
high, and while I still liked to smoke pot -  lots of it, I also wanted to
do other things.

I was so bored by my senior year that I could have chewed my hands off.

As luck would have it Sara and I were partnered in a social studies study
group, and spent most of our time goofing off in the library "researching."
She was friendly and smart and had a great sense of humor. By the end of
that first class we were already trading CDs with each other. By the second
class I felt confident enough to get down to what I really wanted to know:
Or at least what I felt comfortable asking.

"So why did you leave boarding school?" She sighed.

"It was just a mess. The girls were really horrible." I smiled.

"Worse than here?" I winced. "I'm sorry, I know they're your friends." She
looked at me.

"No, Kelly." She took another bite of the bagel I smuggled in.  I liked the
way she said my name. "You're my friend."

Uh oh, was I getting a crush on this girl?

"You feed me." I caught the sparkle in her eyes then looked back down to the
book I was thumbing through. We were supposed to do something about
Picasso's paintings and wartime Spain for this project, and I readily
slipped back into the schoolwork.

I refused to let myself read more meaning into what Sara said, particularly
because she looked way too adorable in her tight baby-t shirt. We were both
melting in the heat of the library, and I guiltily noticed her arm muscles
as she rubbed her shoulder while she read.

I swallowed, wishing we were somewhere else and I actually had the guts to
offer her a backrub.

I really didn't want to have a crush, not now, not on someone at my own
dreaded high school, but Sara was nice to me, and we made each other laugh.
But late at night in my bed, when I had to be honest with myself to get to
sleep, I knew it.

I was falling for her.

The next week two guys in a different project group were in the library.
Jeremy, was sort of king jock and grinned at Sara predatorily. He had an
amazing body for a guy his age, and sauntered over to our table, ignoring
me, as usual. Which was fine, I was staring at Sara's hands, I liked how
graceful, but sturdy they looked and noticed that she kept her nails short,
not painted or chewed up.

"So Sara, Friday Todd's having a party." He leaned closer, he smelled manly,
doused in the proof that he already had to shave. "Come with me." Sara
totally surprised me, I expected her to be excited: To most of our female
classmates, Jeremy was the catch of our school. Instead she leaned back in
her chair and shook her head. "Too late, Jem, I'm going with Kelly to the
movies."  She fanned herself with one of her notebooks and Jeremy tried to
pretend like all was cool. I blushed, knowing that Jeremy would be pissed
off, but also wondering why she'd lie to him like that.

"So," she scooted over to me and put her hand on my knee. "What do you want
to see?"  Maybe it was because I was already blushing or because I liked her
hand on my knee, but my brain wasn't behaving that day. "I dunno, but do you
think our substitute looks like Gina Gershon?" Somehow my brain traveled the
Freudian loop between "Bound," the hot Spanish teacher and Sara's hand on my
knee. Even if she couldn't read all of my thoughts, something equally weird
was running through hers and she shifted uncomfortably giving me a cautious
look. Then she leaned back in her chair, removed her hand from my knee --
keeping her cool in one smooth move.

"Saddly, Miss Gershon nor Miss Espanol are gracing our theaters this
weekend, but we could still hang out." I couldn't believe it, I'd completely
made a fool of myself and Sara still wanted to hang out. And beyond that she
refused a date with the hottest guy in school by announcing her plans to
hang out with me, freak burnout girl who played loud electric guitar when
most girls barely played a decent set of hoops.

I didn't know what was going on, and that night I couldn't get her out of my
head, I brushed my teeth and tried to imagine why she wasn't already grabbed
up by some cute guy like Jeremy. I sighed. She couldn't be interested in me.
That would be the ultimate laugh track. Then I might actually have to do
something, instead of just mope behind my bong and guitar.

I was a mess, I'd never been crushed out like this, and she wasn't making it
any easier. When we watched the movie, I felt her thigh against mine, and
even though the theater was crowded, I think she did it on purpose. By the
end of the night I was so distracted I just wanted to go home.

"Let's go party at Columbia." I knew she liked to hang out at her brother's
dorm sometimes, but never thought I'd be invited along. We were standing on
Broadway, outside the huge Lowes movie palace on 84th street, and I imagined
running into everyone we went to school with. I already told my parents that
I would be home by eleven, the movie was over at ten, and it was only a
quick subway ride home. She must have read the hesitation in my eyes,
because before I even uttered my first `I can't' etc, she had her hands
gripped around my jacket collar and was shoving me into the phone booth.

"Call your folks and tell them you'll be home by two." It sounded workable,
but my mind flashed to my parents and the explanations later of trust and
was there alcohol, etc. etc. blah blah, and I balked. Sara had me cornered
in the phone booth, and if she was a guy I'd be sort of scared, she was
close enough that I could feel her warmth in the October chill, and there
was something in her eyes that was way too mischievous. I took a deep
breathe and wondered why I was sweating. "So call them."  Sara's eyes were
on mine - so tempting, I almost gave in.

"I can't," I thought of some lie I could tell her, but she knew me well
enough that any good Samaritan line about errands for my folks wouldn't fly,
I hid when I was home.

"Are you scared?" Sara's tone changed, instead of taunting she was
concerned, sharing. And her hand was still on my collarbone. It felt warm,
more real than anything I'd ever imagined. We weren't talking about a party
at Columbia. Or at least I wasn't. I blinked, I hadn't smoked pot all day,
but still my brain wouldn't function.

"No." I heard myself blurt. Sara gave me a sad sort of smile and let me out
of the phone booth.

I wanted to puke.

"Maybe next week?" She asked, friendly again. I smiled, but wanted to cry.
What had just happened? Why did I feel my head cracking open?

"Yeah, thanks for the movie, Sara."  I ducked out of her grip and up towards
the subway, I definitely couldn't hug her, not now. If she touched me I
might not let her go.

We didn't talk the whole weekend, we still weren't into the phone thing, and
Monday morning, going to school was worse than usual, I couldn't keep the
memory of the fumbled weirdness outside the movie theater out of my mind,
and would have cut class if I didn't have a Math quiz.

I struggled up the stairs to Spanish, which was boring as hell, our normal
teacher was back with a tan and bunch of slides that no one wanted to see,
and Sara and I sat in the back writing notes to each other under the
projector's flimsy light.

How was your weekend?

Blah -- homework, etc...yours?

Fine. Are you pissed at me?

N-

I put the pen down, the teacher was drilling us on vocabulary we were
supposed to know from the Gina Gershon stand in. And I dutifully droned with
the rest of the class. I wanted to take Sara's hand, I wanted to touch her
face and scream about how I was afraid I was falling in love with her.
Instead all I wrote was:

Do you want to hang out this weekend?

She smiled. Her parents were notoriously out of town doing preppy things at
their Connecticut country house, and she usually had the place to herself.
After class she went to her homeroom, and I smiled to myself at how strange
life was.

We started having lunch together too, and that's when people started talking
about how weird it was that we hung out. I thought it was weird too, I was
used to having a lot more time to myself, not that I minded. Sara was the
best distraction from myself that I could have asked for. Still I had no
idea what she was doing with me, and I asked her as we left school after our
last period social studies class.

"You know, I really like hanging out with you, but..." We were walking uptown,
me to the subway, she to the cross-town bus.

"But?" she looked worried.

"But," I looked into her eyes, she'd been trying to tame a stray lock of
hair all period, and without thinking I tucked it behind her ear. It was too
intimate, too weird. We both sort of stared at each other. "But I don't want
you cutting off your other friends just to hang out with me."  My hands were
at my sides, I'd just touched her, and I wanted to do it again. I loved the
way her shampoo smelled and her skin felt so soft. I grabbed onto the bus
stop, things were all swimmy.

"Kelly," she kept looking in my eyes. We both knew she had to be at her
parent's house to help them prepare for a dinner party in thirty minutes,
this was no time to start the conversation that we needed to have. Or at
least that I wanted to have. I had to tell her that I'd been thinking about
her in a way that you don't think of people who are just friends. "Kelly, I
don't want to be with anyone else." She took my hand, I swallowed.
"You're the most honest, real person I've met at this shit school."

For a moment I wondered if she was going to cry, something was definitely
too strange about the moment, and Kelly dropped my hand. "I gotta go, look
I'll see you tomorrow?"

I went home and finished my homework. My parents went to some benefit so I
smoked pot and played my guitar until I went to bed. My life was getting too
out-of-control, I had to at least tell her that I was gay and allude,
however vaguely, that I might have a crush on her. I was acting like a
freak, my old friends had stopped asking me to go smoke with them at lunch,
and I was actually doing well in math.

But then I woke up Friday morning stunned. I dreamt that Sara and I were in
a bathroom at a party and we were making out against a wall with her pants
down and my fingers deep inside her. I cooed as she trembled and moaned into
my neck. I could feel her hot breathe on my ear, and how her wet heat
clamped down on my hand. I woke up to the sound of my alarm completely
shocked. It was the hottest thing my brain had ever conjured, and I groaned
wishing I could keep the image and feeling for one more second. Instead I
wandered to the kitchen, embarrassed to see my parents, as if they could see
into my libidinous thoughts.

I got to school late, but had a free period and didn't see Sara all day, she
had a field trip, and by the time she got back I was with my advisor
plodding over college applications. Sarah walked by her office, peeked in
and stuck her tongue out at me. I completely lost my train of thought and
grinned. My advisor put down her clipboard and took off her glasses.

"Kelly, that's the first time I think I've ever seen you smile like that,
and certainly it's not your electives for spring, so I'm not going to ask, I
just hope that you keep it up, you look radiant."

Radiant?

Mrs. B. got weird sometimes, but she was sort of a sixties casualty, I
shifted in my seat. "Could it be that some young man has caught your eye,"
my eyebrow arched up, "well I think that's LOVELY." I stifled a groan and
looked at my watch.

Sara and I planned to put a few hours on our upcoming Picasso presentation
before starting the weekend. When we got to her house we took some Chinese
leftovers out of the fridge and walked into her room with our backpacks. The
presentation was due in two weeks, but it seemed easier than talking about
what was really on our minds.

We sat at either side of her desk listening to music and organizing note
cards, but soon the sound of loud guitars came crashing through the wall.

"Oh fuck," she rolled her eyes. "My brother's here with his girl friend."
Her brother was a sophomore at Columbia, but still took advantage of his
parent's house with all the free laundry and food he could hoard. She put
her book down. "Maybe I can get some pot from him, come on." I followed and
watched as she barged in on her boyfriend, obviously in the middle of more
interesting things with his girlfriend.

"Hey you two, I've got company so don't be so loud, and I'm stealing this
joint, ok?" She laughed and walked out. I heard some yelling, but also some
laughter, and was amazed that she was so free with him. Back in her room we
sat on her bed, and Sara pointed at the wall that separated she and her
brother's room. "They've been together forever, and I'm really happy he has
someone he loves, it makes him so much less psychotic," she rolled her eyes
and lit the joint."

I nodded. When she handed me the joint over there was something in her eyes
that made ask.

"What?"  We both took some nervous puffs.

"I have to tell you something."  I looked at her and we smoked in silence.

"Ok...Yeah?" The joint was down to a roach now, and I leaned over her to put
it in the ashtray, we were both sitting on her bed, and it was getting dark
in her room.

"Well today Jeremy asked me out again, but I told him I was hanging out with
you." I didn't like her tone, and I wondered where this was going. "He
called you my wannabe lesbian lover and the whole class laughed." This was
nothing new, I was often the butt of their homophobic jokes, but now a
friend of mine was getting involved, what was worse, it was true: I was her
wannabe lesbian lover.

"Well Sara..." I looked at her. How was I going to do this? "You do know I'm
gay, right?"  I really wanted more of that joint, even if it was down to the
roach and we
both leaned together so fast, me for the joint and Sarah to pass the lighter
that we bumped heads.

"Ow!"

"Ohmigod, I'm sorry." She was in front of me holding my head as I leaned
against the wall by her bed. I'm sure, from her brother's perspective when
he walked in, unannounced, we must have looked quite intimate.

"Whoa, sorry." We both jumped. "I didn't mean to..." His eyes went from Sara
to me then back at Sara as if he had finally figured something out. "We were
going to do some bong hits, but considering you took that joint without
asking, you probably don't want any."

Sara rolled her eyes, but walked after him. I introduced myself to his
girlfriend, Ann, and we sat across from them on their parent's couch. Ann
sat next to Mark and had her hand on his thigh, Mark whispered something to
her and she looked at me then at Sara and raised an eyebrow at him.

"Ok I know, let's play Truth or Dare?" Sara rolled her eyes.

"No way." She started to stand up, but I was intrigued, besides I wanted to
see what Mark said to her.

"It's ok, Sara."  I said, but something in my voice told us both I wasn't
too sure either.

"Yeah come on, Sara, Kelly isn't a wuss." At that, sibling rivalry kicked in
and Sara sat down. She packed herself a bong hit, smoked it, smoked another
one then passed it to me, by now we were both quite stoned and well into the
game. Soon it was my turn.

"Ok, Ann, Truth or Dare." Ann shrugged.

"Truth," We were in a circle, with Ann sitting to my right, it was her turn
next.

"What did Mark tell you before we started playing that made you both look at
us that way?" Mark choked on his bong hit. I looked at Ann, she looked at
Sara, then Mark then me.

"Well," Ann took her time smoking, then shrugged. "He said, `I swear my
sister is fucking that girl.'"  I stared at the bong on the table and
wondered what to say. I looked at Sara, but she wouldn't look at me.

When Ann caught my glance, I must have looked mortified, and she tried to
lighten the mood. "Looks like it's my turn." I looked at her, Mark did too.
"So Kelly, Truth or Dare." I blinked, I couldn't believe after something
like that she'd actually think we were still playing. I must not have said
anything, "ok, I'll take that as a truth then." I looked over at Sara, she
didn't look as if she'd ceased breathing, I guess things were ok.

"So Kelly...Are um...you and Sara, going out?"

"No." I said too quickly, Sara was getting uncomfortable.

"Look, Kelly, we don't have to play..."

"You're lying," Ann said." Mark looked at her in amusement, and she nudged
Mark.  "Looks like they need the good ol' one twenty." Mark laughed.Sara
looked at her brother.

"What's that?" Ann looked at me then Sara and kept smiling.

"That's when we put you in another room for two minutes, and then when you
come back you try to tell us that there isn't something going on with you
two." Mark explained.

"We had to do it to a friend of ours in the dorm, she so didn't see how she
had to be with this guy..." Mark looked at her, "...anyway..."  Sara looked at me
then back at Mark.

"We are so not..." Sara looked at me, I rolled my eyes and shrugged. I didn't
care what people thought anymore, and for the second time that day someone
had called one of us on the one thing neither of us could talk about.

"Uh huh, whatever, I'm timing you. Two minutes." He pointed to the kitchen,
separated by a squeaky door, and laughed. I heard he and Ann whispering and
I held my breathe when Sara took my hand and dragged me in the kitchen.

"I'm sorry they're being such freaks," she said, but I wasn't thinking. I
shook my head and traced her lips with my fingertips and smiled when she
inhaled sharply.

"We wouldn't be here if we didn't want to." I said, looking in her eyes,
confirming what had been happening between us for the past month. I looked
up again and only saw a smile.

I remembered the dream that had left me so befuddled this morning, and
started to blush. Sara pulled me closer to her and I felt her lips on mine.
They were soft and warm and generous. I felt her sucking on my lower lip and
heard a gasp from my mouth. I looked in her eyes and smiled wanting to show
Sara how delicious her kisses were, but she pulled away.

"Let's go to my room?" I nodded. From behind her closed door we laughed when
Ann yelled to Mark we were already gone. Sara locked her door and put on
some loud music, but I could still hear my heart above the volume. "Are you
sure you want to do this?" I pulled her closer to me, I couldn't stop
anymore, I felt my love for her throbbing through my body.

"I need you." I said, and it was true. I'd never felt so in tune with
another person in my life. "We were kissing again, this time she was leaning
up against her desk and I was pressed up next to her, we were both panting,
and she started to take my jacket off. I looked in her eyes.

"Have you ever been with anyone before?" She asked. I shook my head no.

"Have you?" She shook her head. She started pulling her sweater off, and I
took my turtleneck off and sat down on her bed. She had her hair back in a
ponytail and pushed me back towards the pillows. We kissed until we were
both breathing heavily and I felt her knee in crotch, I couldn't believe how
wet I was. I rolled us back over so she was on her back and started pulling
her shirt off. I put my hands on the fabric of her bra and sighed when I
felt her nipples waiting for me. Sara's hips kept pushing into me and she
was kissing my neck.

I opened the clasp on her bra, amazed by her breasts. I loved the feeling of
her nipples in my mouth and dragging them through my teeth. Soon Sara
started pulling my shirt off, demanding my skin, she had already gotten her
pants off -- and we were two nude girls under the covers. We could feel each
other's wetness, and I wanted to touch her so bad.

"Can I touch you?" Sara kissed me and pressed into me as I spread her lips
to feel her sweet velvet. "Ohmigod," I moaned, almost sounding as if I
enjoyed it more than she did. She was so wet that my finger slid right in
and Sara's eyes widened as she moved her hips towards mine. She opened her
eyes half way and smiled.

"You..." she gasped "...are so yummy."  Judging from her reactions, I'd found
her clit and kept stroking it while Sara started sweating and shaking
underneath me. Soon though her moans got louder and raspier, then everything
stopped. Sara trembled underneath me while clenching my arms and kissing my
neck.

"I don't want to tell you I love you the first time this way, but..." she
opened her eyes and kissed me again. "I do."

"No complaints," I grinned and snuggled into her arms. "There's a first time
for everything."